01x02 - Episode 2

[bunniefuu]

The following programme contains
strong language.

Sexual references and scenes which
some viewers may find distressing

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart.

Antonio Salieri.

The whole reason
why I came to Vienna

was to write
for the Imperial Opera!

[GUFFAWS]

Oh, yuck, who wrote this?
Can I change it?

[LAUGHING] Oh, my goodness!

Bravo! Fantastic!

[APPLAUSE] Thank you!

Court composer...

It's an honour to serve the crown.

I want you to succeed here.

Herr Mozart!

[LAUGHS]

Hello!

♪ EINE KLEINE NACHTMUSIK ♪

It used to be
that I could find his voice

As easily as I found my own.

His?
God's!

Oh, yes... Him!

♪ DIE ENTFUHRUNG AUS DEM SERAIL ♪

There were just too many notes!

Just because you're stuck rehashing boring
old operas doesn't mean I have to be!

Maybe God doesn't speak to you
because you f*cking bore him!

Perhaps it was in that moment

I knew I was gonna k*ll
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart!

[MUSIC RISING]

[FLOURISHES]

[INTENSIFIES]

[CONTINUES AND FADES]

[FLAMES FLICKERING]

You're shocked...

I don't blame you.

It's a shocking thing to hear.

Why... Why share this with me?

Why not tell this to a priest
or a constable?

You and I have no great bond.

Or had you forgotten what you did?

But we have the GREATEST bond,
Frau Mozart.

We have him!

[FLICKERING CONTINUES]

[BIRDS CHIRPING]

[SILENCE FALLS]

Herr Mozart?

[CHIRPING RESUMES]

They're ready for you.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER FLOWING]

♪ SYMPHONY NO. 41 IN C MAJOR ♪

[CHEERING]

[MUSIC AND CELEBRATIONS CONTINUE]

Congratulations!

[LAUGHTER]

[LIVELY MUSIC SNAPS IN]

[LAUGHTER AND MERRIMENT]

I expected better of you, you know!

[ALL EXCLAIMING]

[LAUGHTER]

[MUSIC CONTINUES]

[WHOOPING AND LAUGHTER]

[SPLUTTERS]

Ah, right...!

Ah, Antonio!

Herr Salieri!

Oh, and Frau Salieri!
It's the Salieris!

You came!
Well, of course we came!

Congratulations!
Thank you so much, thank you!

Your bride is on a table...?

Yes, I... I don't know why!
[CHUCKLING]

You know,
I've been thinking about it

and I forgive you

for what happened when
you didn't defend me, I really do!

I understand it now,
you're in a very difficult position!

We all know how beholden you are
to this emperor,

all the constraints and the rules!

It's no wonder
that some of your things don't fly!

You're like a big, beautiful bird
in a cage!

I could NEVER do what you do!

It'd drive me
absolutely f*cking mad!

I heard there's a new one coming,
though!

Is that true?
Yes. La scuola de' gelosi.

La scuola de' gelato!

Ice Cream School!

Gelosi.
Ah, gelosi...

The School of Jealousy!

Uh, well, Stanze's sister
is going up for a part.

Very good singer.

Completely f*cking mental,
but, uh...

Lovely singing voice!
Ah...!

Please make yourselves at home!

Enjoy these sausages and gherkins!

Pow!

[LIVELY MUSIC CONTINUES]

[TRAY THUMPS]

[FADES]

[GENTLE NOTES]

[DEEPER]
Mmm...

[CONTINUE]

Mmm!

[SLOW SEARCHING MUSIC]

[DOG BARKING IN DISTANCE]

He didn't come to the wedding.

Who?

My father.

Neither did mine.

I suppose he is dead,
so I have to forgive him.

[LIGHT CHUCKLE]

[EXHALES]

You should write to him.
Tell him off.

Maybe I will.

[PLAYING]

[ABRUPTLY STOPS]
Argh!

[RESUMES]

Come now, you're getting better,
Your Majesty!

What's the punishment for lying
to an emperor, do you think?

Is it flogging or beheading?
[LAUGHS]

There are people in this palace
who'd drag you out into the garden

And beat you to death with rocks
if I asked them to!

All of them, actually!
[CONTINUES]

You still have some way to go
but you ARE improving, Majesty!

[FLAILING]

My niece Elizabeth
is coming to Vienna.

She needs a music tutor,
lest she ends up like her uncle!

The princess?

[STAMMERS] Your Majesty,
I would be honoured to...

Ha, I'm sure you would,
court composer, but, uh...

No, I think the princess would like
somebody a little bit more...

A bit more...?
Oh, I don't know...

Vibrant!

Well, she's young!

You understand
what I'm trying to say!

Yes, I think I do, sir...

She had a rather fun idea,
how about Mozart?

Mozart?
I think she might rather like that!

He tutors, surely?

I've heard the boy play.

I mean, God, if he can rub some of that
off on my niece then so much the better!

How is he, anyway?

I was worried that he was a bit wounded
by my critique on his opening night.

Well, he's written about 200
concertos and gotten married since then

so I think he's doing fine, sir!

[CHUCKLES]

Yes, I was hoping that he might be given
a chance to write something new for us.

Another brothel-set fantasy
with too many notes, perhaps?

Perhaps a little more judiciousness
in your handling of him next time

But it's funny, I went away from that
opera and couldn't stop thinking about it.

It got under my skin somehow.

We need to be BOLDER, Antonio!

You were right,

getting you to rest age Tarare,
it was...

A success.
Safe.

'A copy of a Parisian hit',
that's what my sister called it.

No, courage is what's needed now.

Courage in court and in government.

We need to be BRAVE, Antonio, hmm?

Brave men win the day, do they not?

Of course, Your Majesty.

I'll let you give Mozart the good
news about Elizabeth. Wonderful.

[FOOTSTEPS RECEDE]

[FUMBLING HARPSICHORD PLAYING]

[GROANS]

[CONTINUES]

My goodness, Rupert...

[HOOVES IN DISTANCE]

Have you been practising?

Um, yes...

Yes, no, I can tell!

You've really improved, haven't you?

I kid, of course.

I jest, I jape, I make merry.

I can tell
that you're lying, Rupert.

I can tell
you have NOT been practising.

In fact, what you just produced

leads me to question whether
you haven't actually discovered

something that is sort of
the reverse of practising,

a kind of NOT practising

so powerful as to completely undo all of the
accumulated knowledge of our previous session.

A sort of anti-practice!

Have you cultivated
an irrational fear of competency,

perhaps?

Did somebody perform
rudimentary surgery

And replace your ten fingers
with flaccid baby c*ck, Rupert?

Do you have flaccid baby c*ck
for fingers, Rupert?

Have you even touched this
f*cking harpsichord a single time

Since I walked out of that door
a week ago?

No, I didn't think so...

And THAT'S why
you're not playing it very well!

Now, I'm gonna go and use your privy

in the hope that the noise of my
intestinal fluctuations are more pleasing

Than whatever the f*ck you just
tried to fart out of these keys!

[CLEARS THROAT]

[CHAIR CREAKS]

Baby c*ck for fingers?
Yes...

You're gonna run out of students!

Don't worry, everybody in this town
wants to learn the violin

or forte piano
or the f*cking triangle!