01x06 - A River Runs Zoo It

[bunniefuu]

[upbeat music]

- [snarling]

- [whistling]

♪ ♪

- [snarling]

[yelling]

- Boom!

[laughs]

So, what do we think?

We likey?

- It's a fence.

- This isn't why
- you brought us here, is it?

To bore us to death?

- [gasps]
- Bore you?

This is

a 20,000-volt electric fence

- that stops stray humans
- from getting in the zoo

And eating your damn face.

- What?
- Sport k*lling stray humans

- Is the only fun thing
- to do around here.

- Where am I gonna get
- my thrills now?

Where, Darby?

- Come on, Glenn.

Don't you love the smell

of mutant in the morning?

- Yeah, totally.
- I...

- [gurgling]

- [coughing and retching]

- I think the fence is cool.

- Ugh!
- Thank you, Hudson.

- But how does it know

to only electrocute humans?

- [yelling]
- [humming fades]

- Damn it.

Spent weeks on this.

The heck?

Where did you come from,

little cable friend?

- The heck?
- What the...?

- Oh, look at that.

[techno music]

♪ ♪

all: Whoa.

Whoa!

[laughing]

- Are you seeing this sh*t?

- Huh, a broadcast studio.

Who knew?

- Welp, I'm gonna go fix
- the fence, clean up your mess,

- Save your lives, et cetera.
- What?

Don't you wanna stick around

and make TV with us?

- I don't know.

I always found TV

kind of boring.

- Go fix your fence, fence man.

We'll be sure to forget you

when we're famous.

Come on, everyone.

Let's make some content.

♪ ♪

[crickets chirping]

[TV signal toning]

[sparse string melody]

- [muffled grumbling]

- [cackling]

- Your sloth style is no match

for the fox fist of fury!

Hi-yow!

Oh, God. Cut. Cut.

- We're live, dumbass.

- No, I'm cut.

Oh, it's right through my arm...

Oh, and part of my ribs.

- [muffled retching]
- Eww, gross, dude.

- I don't know what this is,

- but I want 18 more hours of it
- all at once.

[gentle music]

- Come out of Child's Pose

and push up into

a Downward-Facing Dolphin.

- Feel free to grab...
- Is her voice

Making anyone else feel things?

[moaning softly]

- Whew, I got the tingles.

- [whirring]
- "Vivin' on the Edge."

Edgy!

Totally f*cked!

- What am I running from?
- What is this really about?

[laidback guitar music]

- The sign on the building might say "Sanctuary,"
- but if you're a bird - who can't fly,

- It's anything but.
- That's right.

My quest for thrills

led me to my dumbest idea yet,

- embedding myself
- with the zoo's

Most vile flock of fascists,

The Flight Supremacists.

[audience booing]

- It's Deborah.

[laughs]

Uh-huh.

Uh-huh.

No, well, f*ck him then.

Welcome back.

Today, we talk

to three amazing individuals

who make me sick.

- A masochist who finds escape
- through pain.

- [groaning] Oh!

- An attention-seeking
- thrill sl*t.

- I prefer "thrill wh*re."

- And an impotent cheetah.

- Whoa, what the...

- Stick around and let

the reflecting begin...

- [laughs]
- With Deborah.

[audience cheering]

- Who's on crafty?

We're out of crepes.

- My walkie's out of batteries,

- so I'm gonna shout
- the rest of the day.

- [grunting and whooping]

- I can't work like this.

Does the word "professionism"

mean nothing to you idiots?

- The photogenic panda's right.

[stirring music]

This pretzel cart needs

professional management.

- [gasps] Famed television

producer Guy LeFaux?

Everyone shut up right now.

If you Philip-steins

knew anything,

you'd know this toucan

won two Canny Awards

for Excellence in Broadcasting.

- Guilty as charged.

But it's like I said in my

off-the-cuff acceptance speech,

excellence has many meanings,

- but for me,
- it all comes down to...

Biscuits and sh*t!

What's that?

Oh, sorry.

- Thought the little bugger
- was a penguin.

- Awful pests.
- What'd that guy just say?

- I've been watching

your little dog-and-

whatever you are show.

I've never seen so much

potential potential.

A master of blade craft,

an icon of Vinyasa Flow,

and a badass tiger.

- Cheetah, but it's okay.

You're crushing this.

- Give me two-can weeks,

- and I'll have your faces
- on shirts

Faster than you can say,

"Catch phrase."

[applause]

- I'm a sloth, d*ck-beak.

- And what would you say

are the side effects

- of these performance-enhancing
- miracle drugs

- That I'm so proud to endorse?
- [snarling]

- Well, that's the best part,
- Deborah.

- Mm-hmm?

- There are no side effects.

- I know a cheetah
- who would love this.

[upbeat funky music]

- [groans]

- The ratings are in.
- [excited murmuring]

- Oh, my God.
- Oh, my God.

- I'm freaking out.
- I'm freaking out.

- Congratulations, Deborah.
- You're a star.

- [gasps] Oh, my God.

Am I ready for this?

Oh, wait, I was born ready.

- Ah, and Viv.

We're giving your slot to Deb.

- What?
- I'm one expl*sive episode away

- From bringing down
- a hate group.

- Heh. The only thing
- you're bringing down

- Is the ratings
- during primetime.

- But people love my show.

It's real, it's raw, it's...

- Canceled, sorry.

- Take this
- complimentary T-shirt,

And please,

find your thrills off-air.

- m*therf*cker, think you
- can take my thrills

Away from me, toucan?

- What about my show?

- Yes, the jaguar.

- Cheetah. No biggie.

- Remind me again.

- The limited series I pitched

- about the love between
- a cheetah and a Marny...

I... I mean a marine animal.

- Oh, yes, I loved it.

- Except for the ending,
- which I hated.

Start again, and make it more

adult for our late-night block.

- Adult?

- Yes. Naughty it up.

Debbie, let's walk and squawk.

- Oh, Hudson.
- I almost forgot.

- You're canceled too.
- What?

No one cancels the fox fist.

Hi-yah!

Oh, my arms and legs...

and face and hands and body.

- So we've been getting

a lot of feedback.

Mostly that you want less yoga

and more rolling over stuff

[whispering]

while whispering.

[bubble wrap popping]

- Mm.

I got the tingles.

- [snarling]

[electricity crackling]

- Good job, fence.

What the fu...

What the... fah!

[groaning and snarling]

- All right.

Time to shut

this sh*t show down.

Pun deeply intended.

This whole place

is a mutant magnet.

[grunts]

- Do you know what this means?

We're a crossover hit, baby!

- I won't disappoint

my audience.

It's time to class it up.

Politics, discourse.

That's what

Deborah stands for now.

♪ ♪

[moaning]

- And how do you live
- with the shame

Of being a kink icon?

- Huh? I'm a yoga instructor.

I think...

- Ooh!

- Sounds like someone

has some...

reflecting to do.

All: Reflecting to do!

- Reflect on this!

- Bring back
- "Vivin' on the Edge"!

- Bring back
- "Vivin' on the Edge"!

Bring back... aw, f*ck it.

- Hey, have you
- seen Guy lately?

Son of a g*n

still has my tiki torch.

- Anyway, which one
- is Guy again?

- You know, big beak.
- Hmm?

- Weird accent.
- Huh?

- Said he was leaving
- to pretend to be

A TV producer of some kind.

- The f*ck?

- What else can I say
- about him?

Oh! Hates penguins.

Almost as much as I do.

[laughs] Oh, relax.

I'm not some monster.

I just believe birds

that can't fly are unnatural.

Oh!

[bright music]

- Naughty. Rawr.

Oh, yeah.

Mm, like butts.

Yeah,

like two different butts...

Oh, God, Glenn.

Just face it, all right?

You're not naughty

by nature, pal.

[shouts]

[ominous music]

- [snarling] Must...

Reflect.

- That's not good.

[shouts]

- What is she still doing

on my air?

- I can cancel her too,

I'm just saying,

Marny's actually popular.

- We had a deal.

Now are you a tou-can

or a tou-won't?

- Ow!

♪ ♪

- Well, well,

well, well, well.

Start squawking, as*h*le.

[whimpers and farts]

Ugh, gross, dude.

[upbeat music and applause]

- Tonight's

a very special episode.

Please welcome our guest,

the one, the only...

- Guy, or should I say Guy?

[gasp]

Fames flight supremacist

and secret co-conspirator

to your beloved host, Deborah.

- It's true.
- Debbie told me

- If I canceled
- all the other shows,

She'd help take care

of all the penguins.

[all gasp]

- Yeah, which I did.

[gentle music]

Oh, "take care of."

- Yeah, I hear it now.
- That's really bad.

- I'll give you
- a crossover hit,

You bird-brained mother...

[scoffs]

- [yelling]

Humans!

So, so many humans.

[grunts]

- Ah, my fans.

[snarling]

- Aah! My fans!

What do we do?

- [grunts]

- We put on a kickass show.

♪ ♪

[cheering]

♪ ♪

[cheers and applause]

♪ ♪

[cheering]

[roaring]

No!

[cheers and applause]

- Oh!

[humming fading]

[groans]

[disconcerted grumbling]

- Bring it back!

- Ah, sport k*lling humans,

the original thrill.

Now, I've got

a toucan to cancel.

- Ha, ha.
- So long, suck...

[shouting]

- Ah, well, guess I better

take this boring fence down.

So boring.

- Wow.
- Great work, Darby.

- Loving the fence right now.
- Oh, wow.

It's an electric fence.

♪ ♪

- Welp, I'm bored.

What's on TV?

♪ ♪