So, how's your life going?
Having any chest pains?
Been in an accident?
Are you bleeding anywhere?
I'm the one you call
when sh*t goes wrong.
I am your best friend
on your worst day.
And all of the sh*t
you're about to see
happened to a real,
actual paramedic.
Me.
Well, well, well, Taggert.
Randy.
What's up, Mike?
-Who's your friend?
-Nobody.
Student ride-along.
Not a real person.
Man, don't take that sh*t
from them.
Hey. What y'all doin' here
anyway?
Got a disturbing the peace call.
What?
Taggert, what the f*ck
you talkin' 'bout?
They told us it was
an unknown medical.
sh*t, I hope it is.
Somebody gotta go
to the hospital,
that's yo' paperwork, not mine.
Yep, the ABCs of police work.
"Ambulance before cruiser."
Please be
"disturbing the peace."
Please "disturbing the peace."
Come on!
Police!
OD.
That's on y'all, suckas.
sh*t.
-You wanna get the stretcher?
-Gladly.
Is she dead?
She's not dead.
Dying, but not dead.
What do we assess first?
-ABCs.
-ABCs. Um...
-Airway, breathing, circulation.
-Yes.
First thing,
that's what we check.
-Understand that?
-Yes.
-ABCs. They didn't--
-ABCs...
Oh, man.
Oh, oh, oh! Hey!
Know what the treatment is for
a dirty needle stick? Chemo.
Same as for a cancer patient.
Seventy-two hours
flat on your back and puking.
And a year's worth of HIV tests.
Alright. Now...
Ah!
I'm gonna k*ll
you m*therf*ckers.
I should mention at this point
that you're all going to die.
Heart attack.
Car accident.
m*rder.
Cancer.
Diabetic shock.
Fork in the toaster.
Or peanut allergy.
Rich, poor. Old, young.
Sometimes they don't find you
for days.
You'll be dead too one day,
and sooner than you think.
Because guess what?
It all ends.
You know the movie
of your life?
The one you're starring in.
One day, that movie just ends
and you're gone.
Remember what it was like
before you were born?
It'll be just like that.
Forever.
But sometimes,
'cause of people like me,
you get a little borrowed time.
I'm gonna k*ll
you m*therf*ckers.
Get the f*ck outta my house.
g*n! g*n!
Secure your scene, Taggert!
Secure your f*ck' scene!
f*ck, man. First of all,
I ain't know you could run
that f*ck' fast.
God damn, you fast!
Second of all,
who had a f*ck' g*n?
I'm gonna f*ck' k*ll
dispatch for this.
She shot at us.
You idiot! Someone pulls out
a g*n, you run!
- Clear!
- Get your f*ck' ugly-a*s
motherfuckin' hands off me,
you g*dd*mn ugly f*ck' mutt!
Scene's all yours, EMS.
Randy, man, you okay?
I'm fine.
It's gonna be alright,
okay, ma'am?
We're not gonna let you die.
Seriously, you say that
one more time,
I'm gonna punch you
in the throat.
We never say that to a patient.
-Ever.
-Sorry.
What's that?
This is NARCAN.
It kicks the heroin off
of the narcotic receptors.
This woman just paid
a lot of money
to get higher than Jimi Hendrix
and we're about to take that
away from her like... that.
Okay. Um... You know what?
I wouldn't sit there
if I were you.
Why?
Because...
...of the puke.
It's in my mouth!
What the f*ck?!
What did she eat?!
You stole my high, m*therf*cker!
You're welcome.
Your life was saved.
We're taking you
to the hospital, ma'am.
You need to--
Ma'am, settle down.
Hey, no. Hey. Hey! Calm down!
You need to calm down!
Oh, sh*t! Her arm's free!
No!
Oh, sh*t! Oh, no, no, no!
No, no, no!
Got a needle!
That is ill*gal, ma'am!
Oh, God...
Are you kidding me?
You stuck me
with a dirty needle!
You sh*t!
Hey! Mike, brake!
What the f*ck?
Right...
right in the face.
Hold her down!
Hey! Now-- sh*t!
I fell in it! Ah!
You crazy b*tch!
-sh*t!
-Hey, hit her with the oxygen!
-Breathe, b*tch!
-What are you doing?!
I said hit her with it!
What happened?
We administered oxygen.
Yes, and then the patient
needed to be restrained,
uh, thereby possibly resulting
in some self-administered
bruising.
Is that your medical opinion?
Sorry, what medical school
did you go to again, doctor?
-Not a doctor.
-Sorry?
-Not a doctor.
-That's right!
You're not a doctor.
So what do you say we leave
the diagnosing of the patients
-to the real doctors, huh?
-Okay.
I got a dirty needle stick
in the ambulance,
so if you'd please
write a prescription...
-What a shitshow.
-...for retroviral--
You are unbelievable.
Hope you enjoy
this nice, clean hospital...
-Any dignity left in the EMS?
-...while I'm out on the streets
getting vomited on,
having to take pills
that smell like a hobo shat
in my mouth!
Hey!
In one day, I've been...
shot at...
thrown up on, and... strangled.
And what, we still have...
11 hours left in the shift.
How do you guys do this
every day?
It's our job.
Your job sucks!
Yeah, and it sounds real shitty
when you say it like that.
Yeah, well, I can't go back
on that ambulance.
Okay?
I quit.
I'm sorry, Mom.
Your job sucks!
Now there goes
a future doctor.
Temperature readings
warming up a bit today
into the upper 80s.
By noontime, into the low 90s.
...dry and pleasant
weather continues.
Rain expected to return
next week.
That's bullshit!
You can't talk while intubated.
Crescent Premium,
how may I help you?
Uh, certainly.
One moment, please.
Crescent Premium,
may I direct your call?
Well, I see you've certainly
put in your time as a paramedic.
Well, I imagine insurance
sounds pretty boring,
but we do work under
some pretty tight timetables.
How are you at handling stress?
Well, I'm a paramedic.
So...
I-I'm always stressed.
Is that why you chose insurance?
Well, uh... I think that with
my many years of experience,
uh, as a medical provider,
that transitioning to another
kind of medical
or healthcare field,
I could bring, uh,
beneficial experience.
Beneficial how?
Well, I...
think that being a paramedic
is really important work.
And...
in all honesty, I got into EMS
'cause I really wanted
to help people.
But the reality is...
we hardly ever help anybody.
We're just kind of a mop-up crew
for the worst tragedies
in people's lives.
You know?
And, man, I have seen stuff.
I mean, dead bodies
don't even register.
I've seen millions
of dead bodies.
Body parts. I've seen arms
and faces ripped off.
And, man, that image
gets scarred into your brain
for the rest of your life,
and I'm tired.
I'm tired. I just-- I show up to
work first thing in the morning
and my first thought is,
"f*ck everybody."
And given the opportunity,
I would set fire
to that ambulance.
Because it's broken, Bruce.
It's broken. The whole system
is f*cking broken.
And it's sinking
and I'm out with a thimble,
trying to bail it out,
and if I make one mistake,
someone could die.
And you wanna know
my experience?
I'm burning out.
I'm burning out.
I'm burning out.
I'm burning out, and...
I need the hell out of EMS
before I f*ck up
and k*ll somebody.
Uh... you have
any other questions?
22, are you 10-8 yet?
Negative.
-Waitin' on hospital paperwork.
-Waitin' on paperwork.
They are there
hittin' on nurses.
That's some bullshit.
22, get movin'.
Here you go, baby.
Put that back for me?
Oh, hey, Shanice.
-Hey.
-Hey, Randy.
How'd you enjoy your week off?
Oh yeah, great. All the fun
of cancer without the cancer.
Yeah, I had a needle stick once.
Oh, I remember.
That junkie behind the
chicken place, with the hair.
Oh yeah, I forgot.
I was ridin' with you.
Hey, that's right.
Hey, listen.
Um...
You gotta take me
off the schedule.
Please.
You gotta cut down my hours,
somehow.
Really. I'm in...
I'm in terrible shape, Shanice.
Shanice, listen.
-I'm not okay.
-Randy, I am sorry,
but I am shorthanded.
I don't have anybody else,
so you're in 42 with Mike.
Come on...
Why you always sticking me
with Mike?
He's the only one that can
put up wit' your prickly a*s.
You may not know, but you're not
good at interpersonal relations,
and I hope that's not
a shock to you.
'Cause know what?
I rode with you for two years
but you break most people
within two or three months.
Oh, come on. That's not true.
That's not fair.
Lots of people like riding
with me. Like Kim.
You like riding with me,
right, Kim?
Oh. You do so
like riding with me.
She likes riding with me.
Shanice, when we gon'
get a raise?
Oh, baby, I would love
to give you a raise,
and as soon as the government
ups our reimbursements,
that's when you will
get your raise.
And by the way, Randy,
you have another student.
-No. Unh-uh.
-Yes.
No. There's no way. No.
You are senior.
You get the student.
Is there another paramedic
I should put them with?
Somebody better than you?
-Nobody's better than me.
-What I thought you'd say.
Oh, come on, baby.
Don't do me like that.
You know I'm at work.
Look, I don't get off
'til seven.
No, no, no, not p.m., a.m.
I can get at you at 7:30, baby.
All I need's 45 minutes.
That's more than
enough time, you know?
Mm-hmm, about 15 pumps.
Aw, yeah, you know I like that.
Randy's here.
I'll call you back.
Look at this old creaky b*tch.
You know you only got
like ten summers left.
Don't start with me.
I haven't even
had breakfast yet.
Uh, Mike, you gonna let me
drive today?
Uh, no.
Okay? I drive. You know that.
-Come on. Come on.
-No!
Look, I wheel, you heal.
Why do you wanna upset
the natural order of things?
And look, we got
a student today too.
I know. I'm hoping
we can pull out
before that dipshit shows up.
Dipshit's already here.
Oh, f*ck.
Or Jessica.
- Randy.
- Hey, Randy.
-Thanks for having me.
-Hey!
You know something?
You seem pretty smart.
Bet you on the top
of your paramedic class
and everything, ain't ya?
Hmm. Pretty smart.
I'm smart too.
Game recognize game.
- Okay.
- Listen up.
We work a 24-hour shift,
from 7:00 a.m. to 7:00 a.m.
You really wanna spend 24 hours
in this hot box
with two sweaty dudes?
-Yep.
-You're gonna see things
that you can't unsee.
I'm sorry, did I make a mistake?
Because I asked Shanice
to set me up with the best
because I wanna learn
from the best, so...
am I in the wrong truck, or...?
Okay. Alright.
You wanna tag along, fine,
but here's what you're gonna do.
Nothing.
You are going to do nothing,
you are going to touch nothing,
you are going to say nothing
unless I instruct you to.
You understand?
This is not a democracy,
it's a dictatorship.
Okay? What I say goes.
Period. End of story.
Alright, "d*ck-tator."
Let's hit it.
What the hell? We're supposed
to be saving lives
and you're getting a latte?
We don't get lunch
or bathroom breaks.
We got 24 hours ahead of us,
we gotta grab what we can
when we can,
and right now I am starving.
Hey!
Do you guys really have
to park like this, man?
You're taking up
like three f*cking spots.
We park that way in case
we have to leave quickly
in an emergency, sir.
You know what? All you people do
is tie up traffic.
You know that? You should get
a f*ck' real job.
How 'bout that?
Hey, dipshit, we do have
a real f*ck' job.
What do you do with this
plastic-a*s name tag, Kevin?
Huh? Go back to RadioShack,
m*therf*cker!
-Chill out, man.
-I don't have to chill the fu--
-You chill the f*ck out!
-What an as*h*le.
-Yeah, people are mean.
-f*ck you. I'm not chilling!
You'll see.
f*ck' handlebar mustache
b*tch.
Yeah, I'm sorry, Mama.
Uh, coffee and a muffin.
No, you know what?
Two muffins.
One chocolate, one blueberry.
Two muffins, one coffee.
That is...
$10.25.
Um...
- Free coffee for heroes.
- Oh.
Free coffee for firemen
and policemen only.
I'm a paramedic.
Medic 42, emergency traffic.
Sorry...
Medic 42,
respond emergent
to 5200 West Imperial Highway
for psychiatric patient.
Oh, it's your boy Johnny.
Man, I hope
he's wearing clothes today.
You know something?
I bet ya he's not.
Matter of fact, 20 bucks say
he's gonna be butt-a*s naked.
-Oh, no way.
-Twenty dollars.
-Bet you right now.
-I'm in.
You're payin' for my lunch today
'cause he gon' be
f*ck' butt-a*s naked.
-Let's do this.
-Let's do it.
-Come on, big money.
-Okay.
Hey, student of the year,
what do you think? You in?
-ba*ls in or out?
-ba*ls?
I am Satan
and his only messenger!
Well, there you have it.
It's a draw.
Shirt, no pants.
What are you talkin' 'bout?
That's bullshit, okay?
I can see his d*ck.
That qualifies.
He's not naked!
Call that naked?
He's wearing a shirt.
Shirt, no pants. That's like,
uh... Winnie the Pooh.
I guess Winnie the Pooh
got his d*ck out
because I can see
Winnie the Pooh's d*ck.
Johnny, bring your naked a*s
over here!
Leave this place...
or I'll destroy you all!
Oh, oh. Okay, so you really
wanna test your immortality?
-Okay.
-Leave now!
I am Satan
and his only messenger.
Man, that's greedy as f*ck.
You cannot be Satan
and his only messenger.
Just pick one, okay?
Got too many f*ck' jobs!
I am Satan
and his only messenger!
Okay. You know what?
Have some breakfast. But...
leave people alone.
Lay low. Okay?
Or I'm gonna hook the
defibrillator up to your face.
Bzz! You understand?
It don't matter.
Put some f*ck' pants on
and get your ashy
leprechaun a*s from over here.
Nobody want to see that sh*t!
Satan does!
What...
County, it's Medic 42.
We are available.
No patient on scene.
Repeat, no patient on scene.
Wait. What are you doing?
You abandoned your patient.
You could lose your license.
- Satan loves me!
- That is not a patient.
That is Johnny.
If he was actively schizo,
he'd be pulling out his hair
and biting his lips
until they bleed.
That's what Johnny does
when he's not on his meds.
Right now, Johnny's acting
this way because he's hungry.
-Oh, he's hungry. Yeah.
-Yes.
The guy wagging his d*ck around.
-Yeah.
-That-- He's hungry.
He wants us to take him
into the ER
where they have to give him
a meal before they let him go,
because the ER has no choice.
They legally
can't turn anyone away.
Now, we could bring him in
for his ER happy meal,
but guess what? There's a
sh*t-ton of paperwork involved.
So it's a lot easier for me
to skip the middleman
and give him my breakfast.
And I'm starving!
Okay. So just to recap.
Your medical solution
is muffins.
I sacrificed
my delicious muffins
for the good of humanity.
-Mike, let's roll.
-Alright. We're outta here.
Why are you here?
Because I wanna save lives.
-Is that funny?
-You wanna save lives.
You think we savin' lives?
Come on, now.
We just gave a dude muffins.
Yeah, I used to want
to be a hero,
but the fact is,
we're not heroes.
Okay?
The fact is that
most of the calls we get
are bullshit.
The people that need us
don't call,
and the people that call
don't need us.
People live, people die.
You rarely make any kind
of difference whatsoever.
This is a job.
Okay? You clock in,
you clock out.
At the end of the day
you go home. That's it.
I don't think
you really believe that.
No, I do.
I do. I really, really do.
And you should too
if you want to last.
But you have people's lives
in your hands.
How can you not care?
How can you not give a sh*t?
Caring is what kills you.
The fact is,
most people in this job
can't last a year.
They can't hack it.
And good ones,
the really, really good ones?
Five years.
Five years, max.
That's all they can handle.
How long have you been doing it?
Eighteen years, nine months.
Alright, class president,
this one's for real,
so pay attention.
You're with me. Grab the bag.
-Okay.
-Don't touch anything.
Nothing. Got it?
But then why am I...
...even here?
Walk. Don't run. Never run.
- Why?
- Why?
Oh, sh*t. Door's stuck.
-BSI.
-What?
-BSI!
-What the f*ck is that?
-Put your gloves on!
-Oh. Okay.
- Hey, Jimmy.
- Hey.
Need you
to pop that door.
- Got it.
- Also need an additional driver.
I need Mike in the back with me.
- We're on it.
- Hey. Everything's okay?
What is that?
I answer questions
after the fact.
It's a window punch.
Okay, go ahead.
Pull her out the side.
-Move in.
-Little more.
Alright,
head of her class,
what do we assess first?
Airway, breathing, circulation.
He's breathing,
but it's rapid deep breaths.
Kussmauls?
Wait, am I right?
Rookie, get out the way.
What's goin' on here?
Got Kussmauls.
Possible broken everything.
What about you?
Lady was just a little shook up
but she's alright.
Alright. Grab me a collar,
will ya?
Okay, I got you.
-Get out the way.
-Sorry. Sorry.
Alright, and grab me
a non-rebreather.
You just said
not to touch anything.
And now I'm asking you to touch
a non-rebreather
and bring it to me.
Wait. No. No.
Sorry. Sorry.
Not in the truck. In the bag!
-The what?
-In the bag! In the bag!
Oh, sh*t.
Walk. Don't run.
Hey, buddy. Can you hear me?
One, two, three.
One, two, three.
No. Yeah, I got him.
-How am I doin'?
-Alright.
Nothing in the belly,
good in all four.
Got this, hero?
Oh, sh*t. He's in V-fib.
You, I need you to do CPR.
Now. Go. Go!
Harder.
Harder!
You're not doing anything.
Harder!
Oh, God! I think
I just broke his ribs.
No, no, no. That's a good thing.
A good thing.
Don't stop, okay?
Means you're doing it right.
Yeah. I can fix broken.
I can't fix dead.
Come on!
Um, are we gonna shock him?
No, we gonna wax his chest.
Yes, we gonna shock him.
Charging.
Clear.
Brainiac is clear. All clear.
Comin' through.
Hello? Hello, hello!
Got a approximately 40-year-old
male, two-car MVA.
Restrained driver.
Severe damage to the vehicle.
Ten-minute extrication.
Kussmauls at first,
but once we got him out
went apneic and V-fib.
Been shocked three times.
Last was on the drive here.
Now asystolic.
Ready? One, two, three.
Pupils are fixed and dilated.
Fractured right arm and
depressed skull fracture in--
Hold compression.
Just hold, hold, hold. Please.
He's asystolic.
You said he was traumatic.
Did you ever get a pulse back?
-No.
-No.
No.
Time of death, 10:29.
Oh, God.
You gotta be sh1tting me.
Is that mud?
Well, nice job, Dr. Randy.
Just track all the mud
and bacteria you want
into my ER.
Seriously?
Hey. What happened?
The doctor just called it?
That's it?
Yes, that's it.
Dude was dead when we got there.
Okay, well, if you thought
he was dead,
then why did you make me do CPR?
Because nobody dies
in an ambulance.
What do you mean?
It's an ambulance.
-People die all the time.
-Nobody dies in the ambulance.
It's a legal nightmare.
Once we start working on you,
we're not allowed
to declare you dead.
Only a doctor or coroner
can do that.
So even if he has
zero chance of making it,
even if we're just pumping blood
through a corpse,
we cannot declare him dead.
Now, he can be dead
before we show up,
he can be dead
once we drop him off,
but never, ever in between.
That doesn't make
any medical sense.
It's not medicine.
It's healthcare.
Welcome to EMS.
No.
No! God damnit.
Stay.
No! Go!
Take my dollar,
you m*therf*cker!
God damnit!
Children can hear you.
Fine. Good. You have a dollar?
What I don't understand is,
if you hate your job so much,
why don't you just quit?
'Cause I like to eat and I don't
like to sleep in the gutter.
- So get another job.
- Like what?
Like airline pilot? Huh?
I've tried. I am stuck here.
Okay? Work at the hospital?
All I'm qualified to do is
change bedpans and wipe asses.
My training
doesn't mean sh*t here.
Go to med school? Forget it.
No. By the time I finish,
it will be time
for me to retire.
Okay.
Wait. What? No!
God! I hate you!
No! No! No!
God!
Okay.
Randy?
Oh, Christ. I feel like my
heart's coming out my as*h*le.
Hey. Hey.
What's the matter?
No, I'm fine. I'm fine.
-You havin' a heart attack?
-No. Just stop it. God.
- No.
- Okay, so a panic attack.
-No, it's not.
-Take some slow, deep breaths.
Uh, hello? Paramedic.
Are you okay to work like this?
Look,
I'm gonna be fine. I just...
Just need some-some time.
You don't understand.
You know,
when I was 13...
my mom and my sister and I
went camping
in the middle of nowhere.
And my mom really liked
cold chicken,
so we were eating cold chicken
on a picnic table
with some potato chips,
and my mom got a piece
stuck in her throat.
And I didn't... I didn't know
the Heimlich or anything...
so right there...
in that dumb campground...
...my mother died.
And I just watched.
So that's why I'm...
that's why I'm here.
I'm gonna tell you something
that I wish someone had told me
a long time ago.
Run away from this job
as fast as humanly possible...
or you will end up like this.
That's weird.
Uh, hello? This is Randy.
Okay.
Okay.
What you mean you can't be late?
I know you're a teacher.
f*ck those kids.
Just don't--
It's too early to be...
What the f*ck goin' on wit' you?
Hey, stop.
Mmm!
Yeah, I think Randy doin' crack.
Whoo-hoo!
Yeah!
Hey! I quit!
I quit!
I got a new job. I'm quitting!
That's it. I'm done.
I'm done. I got a new job.
I can't believe...
I totally thought
that I blew the interview,
but apparently
they loved my honesty.
So... that's it. I'm outta here.
So... It's...
Shanice, you've been amazing.
It's not you. Really.
Thanks.
You're the best supervisor.
I really-- Thank you s--
I don't need to give you
two weeks, do I?
I don't think I could stay
another two weeks.
I can't do two weeks' notice.
They need me to start Monday.
Come on. Please, please l--
I can't believe it!
Honestly, I didn't know
that I could feel happy.
Hello?
Are you still there?
Yes, I'm still here.
Can we, uh, re-up
on rubber gloves,
hypos, and normal saline--
Hang on!
Randy!
I did not say you could quit.
And you have to finish
your shift!
- as*h*le.
- Excuse me?
No, no, no! Not you.
Okay! We ride!
We ride!
Ha-ha!
Whoo!
So long, f*ck!
Yeah!
Ah...
I love the smell
of nursing home in the morning.
How you doin'?
Hmm. What's for lunch?
What the f*ck is wrong wit' you?
Sorry?
This happiness
is making me uncomfortable.
It's actually
kinda freaking me out.
Yeah, it's a little unnerving.
Well, in 18 more hours,
I am done with EMS forever.
Uh, hi. Hello.
What took you so long?
What you mean
what took us so long?
We got here in six minutes.
That's two R&B songs.
Six minutes.
We can't get here faster
than six minutes.
The f*ck you think we got,
a teleporter?
Uh, where's the patient?
Alright, look. Just-Just...
follow me.
This way.
Come on.
How the f*ck
did he get this job?
She's been having a little
trouble breathing lately.
Define "lately."
Newbie, what's your assessment?
Well, she's cyanotic,
appears to have lividity.
In my professional opinion...
she's dead.
Hmm.
-You gotta do something.
-Do something? What? CPR?
She's dead.
Got a better chance
of reviving the nightstand.
You gotta try.
No, we're not touching her.
- Unh-uh.
- Alright.
I'm gettin' the charge nurse.
You can if you want to.
Is the charge nurse a magician?
Because that's the only way
this lady is coming back alive.
With magic!
Waste of time.
Even the newbie knew
she was dead.
No offense.
I am offended.
Hey, County. Medic 42.
Medic 42,
this is County. Go ahead.
County,
we need a coroner.
We have a DOA on the scene
and, uh, we're standing by
for paperwork.
Copy, 42.
Contacting coroner.
What do you mean, coroner?
What's going on here?
Your patient is assuming
room temperature,
I declared her dead,
the coroner is coming,
and we are going to leave.
How do you know she's dead?
What are her vitals?
You wanna know her vitals?
Well, if you must know,
zero pulse,
zero over zero blood pressure,
zero respirations.
Like all... zeroes.
Would you like to know
her blood sugar?
She was just fine when I checked
on her a few minutes ago.
A few... minutes ago? Really?
Shake her hand.
Go over and shake her hand.
Do it.
- I'm good.
- Mike?
Look.
Look!
"Hi. I'm dead."
g*dd*mn, she cold.
You know why she's f*ck' cold?
Because this is rigor.
'Cause she's dead.
This type of stiffness
don't take a few minutes.
We talkin' five or six hours.
Huh? You can iron
your clothes on her,
that's how stiff she is!
Stiff as a board!
Can I be honest wit' you?
You're probably the worst nurse
I've ever f*ck' met.
This is totally unacceptable.
I'm calling your supervisor.
Oh. Please do.
That would be hysterical.
In the meantime, I suggest
you get Mrs. Pustelli on ice.
She's starting to add
to the lovely aroma around here.
I smell dead people.
- Hello!
- Randy,
who is this nursing home lady
screaming at me
on the other line?
Look, these people are idiots,
okay?
They had a patient of theirs
that was dead for hours.
Randy, you have got
to learn to manage these people
and stop acting like
an as*h*le to everybody.
Now I gotta deal with this mess.
What do-- It's my last day,
Shanice.
It's not my last day,
and if you finish your shift
we'll see if it's your last.
Really? Oh, no.
This is definitely my--
I said what I said.
f*ck.
So, Carol, if you were
assessing that patient,
would you classify them
as alive?
I see. No, no, no.
No, you're right.
I don't have a nursing degree.
I was trained as a paramedic.
Uh-huh. Well, let me ask you
something, Carol,
since you deal in elder care.
My grandmother died
12 years ago at the age of 99
and we buried her
next to my grandfather
at that cemetery out
by the airport. Know the one?
Uh-huh. Well, let me
ask you this.
If you and I were to
go out there together right now
and dig up
my grandmother's corpse,
do you think
you could revive her?
Because that makes
about as much sense
as what you're saying
to me right now.
Your patient was dead, b*tch.
Mm-hmm. And your people
didn't realize it
for five or six hours.
That is called negligence.
But you thought
you'd just call 911
and cover your asses,
is that it?
Ah. Well, how 'bout you and I
call your administrator
and go over this incident
point by point
and see which one of us
still has a g*dd*mn job
by the end of the day?
Oh! You're suddenly okay?
We're clear now, Carol?
Great. Well, if you have
any more problems,
my name is Shanice,
you call me immediately.
You got that?
Damn right.
Oh my God, I am so hungry.
Mike, find a taco truck
or something.
My stomach is eating itself.
Got you.
That's all you have to say.
You didn't really quit, did you?
Yeah. I did.
-No, you didn't.
-Yeah, I did.
No, you did not.
Yes, I did.
Look, look.
Let me say this, okay?
Randy has been in this
way too long, okay?
EMS is not supposed to be
working this long.
He don't know what he's gonna do
out in the real world.
This m*therf*cker can't do sh*t.
What are you talking about?
I wouldn't know how
to function out there?
Oh, but you know
how to function out there.
-You damn right I do.
-Yeah.
I function well out there too.
'Cause I'm a normal
f*ck' person.
I go home, I take a sh*t,
then I take a shower
and I put on my clothes
and I pick up my lady,
we go to dinner,
then we come back home
and we f*ck.
Okay? That is called
being a part of society.
You, on the other hand,
would not survive one day
in the real world.
'Cause he ain't did sh*t.
Don't do nothin' besides this.
When the last time
you been on a date?
Hmm? When was the last time
you washed your f*ck' sheets?
Oh...
Well, where are you gonna work?
I'm working
in an insurance company.
- What?!
- What?
-Are you...
-What?
You gon' work in insurance.
Please.
Man, you can't even work
at f*ck' Subway.
I could w-- I could too
work at Subway.
You gotta deal with customers
to work at Subway.
Yeah. I could deal
with customers.
You could?
Let's pretend I'm a customer.
-Okay.
-Okay. You ready?
-Yeah.
-I walk in. Ding!
The little bell go off.
I'm in there.
Oh, hello, sir.
Are you having a nice day?
I'm having a great day.
I would like a sandwich
for lunch.
-Okay.
-You really supposed to--
Would you like a six-inch
or a footlong?
Okay. I want a six-inch
vegetarian sub, okay?
-On wheat with chicken.
-Mm-hmm.
- Hmm.
- Okay.
Uh... that-that doesn't make it
a vegetarian sub
if you add chicken.
No. I would like, like I said,
a six-inch vegetarian sub
on wheat with chicken.
I'm sorry, sir, we can't do that
'cause that's not
a vegetarian sub.
m*therf*cker, it is.
-I'm the customer.
-If you have chicken on it...
See? That's exactly why
you couldn't work there.
-But it's not vegetarian!
-It is vegetarian!
There are rules here, sir.
There are rules.
I can order whatever
the f*ck I want. Alright?
I want a orange Fanta
with grape juice in it.
You can serve
your own drink, sir.
Here's your cup.
Go to the drink station.
What type of r*cist sh*t
is that?!
f*ck that.
I'm calling corporate.
Beep-beep-boop-beep-beep.
Corporate.
Hey! This dude named Randy
that work at the Subway
is a as*h*le, okay?
He tried to make me
make my own f*ck' drink!
Also this is
a Black man calling,
so you know what that's about!
Bye! Fired!
-sh*t.
-Alright. Alright.
Well, you know what?
I'm not working at Subway,
so... win-win.
Medic 42.
No. Come on!
Not now. Don't take it.
No. No. No, Mike. Please.
Come on, man. It's our job.
-42 is here. Go ahead.
-Oh, God.
Medic 42,
emergency traffic.
Respond emergent
in 33 Cooper Court.
Oh man, I hope this patient
is dead so I can eat...
...a taco.
Oh, this is gonna be
f*cked up.
Hey. Hey. Sir?
S-Sir, excuse me. We just--
We just wanna take a look at--
Yeah. Hey.
- What?
- Hey, sir, uh...
Why don't you get on the ground
so we can help you out, okay?
-Here, come here.
-Should I take my helmet off?
No!
-No.
-No.
Real s-- No! Okay.
God damnit.
- Better...
- Oh.
You've had a little too much
to drink this afternoon?
- Just a little.
- Be right back.
I'ma get the rest
of the equipment.
Hold C-spine, please, madam.
-Yep.
-Thank you.
Hello there. My name's Randy.
We're gonna be taking you
to the hospital today.
-What's your name?
-Uh, my name's Matt.
Or Matthew.
Okay, Matthew.
I'm, uh...
just wondering if you--
Know what?
Maybe call me Matt, actually.
-That feels more like...
-Okay, Matt.
Matt it is.
Any other pain anywhere? Hmm?
Eh, just like...
a little headache,
but I don't think
it's a big deal, doc.
Uh, not a doc. Paramedic.
Can you tell us a bit
about what happened?
Uh, yeah.
I crashed my bike--
-Oh, hey!
-Okay!
- We wanna hold you real still.
- Sorry.
Real still.
I don't have to go to the haps--
hospital, do I?
'Cause I don't have insurance.
Matt, don't worry about that.
They're just gonna send you
a soul-crushing bill later on.
Excuse me. Excuse me.
I'm a nurse!
Excuse me. I'm a nurse.
I saw the ambulance
and figured you'd need help.
Let's get this helmet off.
You don't have to do that.
Lady, I don't wanna be
mean to you
'cause you remind me
of my auntie,
but leave us the f*ck alone.
Is this like a turf w*r over me?
Right. I need you
to bandage his eyes.
What's wrong
with my eyes?
Eyes. Both. Both eyes.
Why? The other eye's fine.
Not a democracy.
-Both eyes.
-That doesn't make any sense.
- Why would I do that?
- Both eyes.
Hey, do you guys know
what you're doing?
Because, like, it sounds like
you don't agree.
Oh, we know exactly
what we're doing.
Let him see out of his good eye.
Taggert! Escort this lady
out of my presence immediately.
What?
-Come with me, ma'am. Let's go.
-Out.
I'm not leaving my patient.
-Mm-hmm.
-No. This is my patient!
Mine!
Sorry.
I'm trying to understand.
Did you have me wrap both eyes
because you didn't want him
to panic?
What did I say?
Not in front of the patient.
-I-I don't understand.
-Not in front of the patient!
-I'm trying to understand.
-Dictator, remember? Dictator!
Yeah, dic-something.
I can hear you guys.
Ladies and gentlemen,
this is Matt, or Matty.
- 42-year-old male.
- Matthew.
Conscious but not alert.
ETOH on board.
Penetrating injury
to his right eye.
As far as we can tell,
no neuro involvement.
Vitals are stable. No SOB
or other injuries detected.
Wow. That wasn't interesting
at all.
'Cause to me,
what I'm seeing here
is a stick in the eye!
What?
I'm sorry, sir.
Your eye, it's, um...
jelly.
Aw, man!
I can sew it up
and give you an eye patch.
That's the best I can do
for you, though.
You can thank your friends
in EMS.
I did everything right.
Get out of my ER.
That guy's a d*ck.
No, no, no.
No, no. Why both eyes?
-It is a reasonable question.
-Listen.
Our patient is scared
and confused
and he needs to know we know
what the f*ck we're doing.
So stop asking questions
in front of him
like a f*cking five-year-old.
Know what? I came here
to learn from you
because I thought you had
something to teach me.
Instead, you give me bullshit
about how saving lives
doesn't matter
because you're dead inside.
You're everything
I don't want to be. Everything.
-Shh! Shh!
-Top to bottom. What kind of--
Boo-hoo. Are you jaded?
Are you Mr. Tough Guy?
-What's behind the eyes?
-The brain.
Right. And do we want that
stick moving, carving the brain?
-No, we don't.
-No. We do not. Right?
-How many eyes do we have?
-Oh, come on.
-How many eyes do we have?!
-Two! We have two.
Do they work independently?
Oh, sh*t.
Yeah.
Where one eye moves...
the other one follows.
They move in tandem.
How far is that stick
back there?
We don't know.
Is it digging up the brain?
We don't know.
Our job is to stop the trauma
and get him into the ER
as soon as possible.
Listen.
The problem at an accident scene
is everyone is so amped up
and full of adrenaline
they get tunnel vision.
They're just looking
at the one problem.
They're not seeing
the big picture.
Our job, while everyone else
is freaking out,
is to take a deep breath,
step back,
and see the whole thing.
You're right.
-Sorry?
-You're right.
I didn't think about that.
Thank you.
Uh...
Okay. Uh...
I shouldn't have questioned
you in front of a patient.
I'm sorry.
It won't happen again.
Are we good?
Yeah. Yeah, we're good.
Well...
Let's get a burger
before I drop dead.
Did you put that dipshit
in his place?
No.
Because he was right
and I was wrong.
Okay, look. Randy can be
an as*h*le sometimes, you know?
Okay, yes, he's a as*h*le
all the damn time.
But there's nobody else I would
ride with other than him.
Jesus!
What the hell, man?!
-What are you--
-He's falling apart.
Pedestrians have
the right of way!
You almost k*lled me!
We all end up like that?
-Calling yourself a paramedic!
-A broken mess?
Get out!
Hey. Hey. Hey.
Can we go? Please? I'm hungry.
-Okay.
-Alright.
Let's go feed this m*therf*cker.
Stop!
-Okay?
-What?
What you're doing
is f*ck' disgusting.
-I'm hungry.
-What you mean, you hungry?
Just puttin' sh*t in your mouth.
You're eatin' like
a f*ck' Pac-Man.
You know something?
I don't even wanna eat no more.
You just-- I done lost
my appetite watchin' you eat.
Pretty soon,
I'm starting this job,
I'm gonna have
a real lunch hour.
One hour every single day.
I'm gonna work nine to five.
I'm gonna go home,
I'm gonna sleep.
Hey.
Excuse me.
Um, are you an ambulance driver?
-Paramedic.
-Okay. Wait.
Can I just ask you one question?
Okay. Can I just have
like ten more minutes
and then I'll answer
whatever question you have.
Wait. One thing. Super quick.
What's the worst thing
that you've ever seen?
Why do people
always ask me that?
I mean, I get that
there's a morbid fascination,
but I mean,
why do they ask me that?
What's the worst thing
that's ever happened to you?
Want to think about that
right now?
I sure don't.
I have seen
some terrible things.
I know things that
you do not want to know.
I know what brains smell like.
Brains have a distinct smell.
Did you know that?
Sometimes I smell it
when I come out of the ambulance
and I know right then and there,
better watch my step
or else I'll slip and fall in
some poor dead soul's memories.
You know what's in there?
Dead two-year-old.
She got decapitated
by the seat belt upon impact.
Wanna look in there?
You want that image seared
into your brain
forever and ever?
Well, someone's gotta
look inside.
Someone's gotta have that image
in their brain
for the rest of their lives.
I'm that somebody.
That's not even the worst thing
I've seen.
So we get a call,
unknown medical,
neighbor's complaining
about smells.
Go into the apartment,
meet the woman,
she seems totally normal,
but apparently she's suffering
from postpartum depression.
So I ask her,
"Where's the baby?"
"Where is the baby?"
Sure enough, there it is,
in the microwave.
-Stop.
-And its face...
was like melted cheese.
Oh my God.
That is the worst thing
I've ever heard in my life.
I know!
I ordered it medium rare!
Ah, come on!
-What the f*ck?
-Come on!
Hey, come on.
Don't be like that.
You wanted to know.
You don't want
your chicken sandwich?
You gonna finish that?
Okay, so, there wasn't actually
a baby in the microwave.
See, that's what it is.
You still new to all this.
And you ain't seen sh*t yet.
Like, nothing. Not at all.
You still got
all that resilience in you.
You got the emotional reserves
in the bank.
You got all that in there.
And when bad sh*t happen,
you still got that cushion
inside.
Yeah, but when you been
doin' this long enough...
...you run out
of those reserves.
Yeah, but you keep doing it.
Aw, hell no.
sh*t, I'm goin' to law school
in six months.
-What?
-Yeah.
Why law school?
You know who gets
f*cked over more
than anybody in this country?
Hardworking people.
Hardworking people.
Perfect example: My mom.
She, uh, passed two years ago
of-of cancer.
And two years before that,
she went to the hospital
'cause she knew something
was wrong.
You know,
and they checked her out.
Her insurance covered that.
They diagnosed her,
and her insurance covered that.
But when it came
to actually helping her...
they told her she didn't have
the right policy.
She did her best. She was
calling the insurance company
and... arguing
and fighting and...
But as she was doing that,
the cancer spread.
And she died.
Wasn't even about the doctors
at that point.
She needed a lawyer.
Look, I wanna help people.
That's why I became EMS.
You know?
I wanted to make a difference.
And I don't feel like
that's what we doin', man.
Also, I...
would love to not make
minimum wage anymore.
I'm broke as f*ck.
I'm taking all this sh*t home
and warm it up later.
I don't have a g*dd*mn thing.
Well, you know,
it's nighttime now,
so it's 'bout to get
really weird.
-Weird.
-Weird how?
Medic 42,
respond to A143 Orange Avenue
for a psychiatric patient.
sh*t, man. It's the president.
I'm the president
of the United States!
Ah! sh*t! He hit me in my nuts!
Mike! Help! Mike!
Get your hands off my friend,
m*therf*cker!
Mike!
Ah!
Hit him with something!
Not fruit!
Don't hit him with fruit!
Call another ambulance!
Charlie, we're trying
to f*cking help you!
- Stop it!
- I'm the president!
I'm the president
of the United States!
This is what happened last time.
So that is why we gotta get him
in the ambulance peacefully
or he will kick
the living sh*t out of us.
He sounds like he needs to be
in a psychiatric facility.
No, no, no, no, no.
Look, he's a sweetheart, man.
He don't mean any harm,
you know?
That's usually
when he's on his meds.
Now, if he's off his meds,
it's a different story.
Plus it's the end of the month.
What happens
at the end of the month?
Look, the system give him
20 pills a month, right?
But there's 30 days in a month.
What do you think Charlie do
with those other ten days?
Loses his sh*t.
Sometimes he makes it
to the end of the month,
sometimes he don't.
Right now look like he didn't.
So we're not calling PD?
-No.
-No.
Look, look, look.
Charlie is a 6'6" Black man
with mental health issues.
Would you call the police?
Hey, Mike, k*ll the lights.
We don't wanna set him off
any more than he already is.
I'm the president
of the United States!
I hate the end of the month.
Wait, wait, wait.
Hey.
-You have all your teeth?
-Yeah.
Then you're gonna wanna stay
about, oh, I don't know...
-Oh.
-...that far back.
Alright. Alright.
Alright, look.
-Y'all ready?
-Ready.
Okay, I'm 'bout to knock.
Secret Service!
sh*t.
Uh, h-hey, Mr. President.
Look, look, um...
The Secret Service, man.
We here to evacuate you
and take you to the White House.
What about the first lady
and the vice president?
We're gonna send
a second chopper.
Mm-hmm.
We're not leaving anyone behind.
- Okay.
- Okay?
-Top secret.
-Top secret, so lay low.
Come. Sir.
-Come on.
-Please. Please. Come. Come.
Come on.
Stay low. Stay low.
Watch for sn*pers, sir.
Right this way, sir.
Right this way.
-Here we go.
-No.
- No.
- It's the chopper.
Hey, show him
that it's the chopper. Like...
The chopper's right here, sir.
Right this way.
Come on, man. You got this.
Come on. It's good.
Alright, we got Mr. President
with us.
Come on, sir.
sh*t.
- Hey. Hey. Hey.
- No. Hey. Hey.
Officers. Excuse me.
Uh, hey, we've got this
totally under control, okay?
This is, uh, a patient of ours.
He's having an episode
right now.
There's really, uh...
-Calm down.
-No reason to panic.
Just relax.
We just came here to help.
We got a call.
Just back up.
If you could please
turn off your lights.
-We got a call...
-Got a psychiatric patient.
The lights are gonna make him
really nervous.
Calm down, alright?
-I'm the president.
-I know you are. You are.
I'm the president
of the United States.
-We're just here to help.
-He's having an episode.
Just back up. Back it up! Now.
Listen. But you gotta chill.
Just relax, okay? We got you.
-I'm the president.
-I know.
-But you've gotta stay calm.
-I'm the president!
-Please.
-I'm the president!
-Calm down!
-I'm the president!
I'm the president
of the United States!
-Whoa!
-No, no, no, no, no!
-I'm the president!
-Hey, chill! Chill! Chill!
Calm him down.
No. Please.
You do not have to do this.
-Ma'am, back up.
-Okay.
Please, you've gotta put
the g*ns down!
He's not a danger!
-I'm the president!
-Now!
-Now!
-Come on!
-I'm the president!
-Calm him down, or I will!
-I will! Okay. Okay.
-Right now! Or we will.
-Okay, let me--
-Right now!
Hey. Hey. Hey. Calm down.
Look at me. Look at me.
Look at me. Calm--
You gotta calm down, man.
Please, please calm down for me.
Okay?
Please calm down.
They don't give a f*ck, man.
But I give a f*ck, okay?
Hey, hey, Mr. President.
Charlie.
I see you, okay?
I see you and I got you.
But you gotta calm down, okay?
I don't want anything
to happen to you.
I won't let nothin'
happen to you.
Just calm down. Okay?
Okay. Okay.
Hey...
As you can see,
he's calmed down, okay?
I'm EMS.
That's our ambulance
right there. We got him.
Okay? He's just havin'
an episode today.
Alright?
Just put the g*ns down, alright?
Please.
Okay.
Alright.
Hey. Hey! Look at me.
I'm proud of you, man.
Thank you.
Thank you.
I'm good.
- This way.
- Everything's fine, okay?
Just have a seat.
She's gonna belt you in, okay?
We can't take off until
we get you belted in, okay?
I'm the president
of the United States!
I'm the president
of the United States!
I'm the president
of the United States!
I can't f*ck' do the IV!
-Okay, I got it. Just breathe.
-I can't get it!
I'm the president
of the United States!
I'm the president
of the United States!
Randy, can you do me a favor
and maybe, um...
maybe keep the president calm
for a little bit?
Yeah, I'm on it.
County ER, it's, uh, Medic 42.
Can I get a physician on?
Copy. Standby.
I need a doctor's permission
to administer a sedative.
This is Dr. Serano. What?
Uh, yeah, Dr. Serano,
this is Paramedic Randy.
Uh, currently en route
to your facility,
and an emergent
psychiatric patient.
Patient was uncontrollable
at scene
and actively fighting
the restraints.
Uh, blood pressure 172 over 100.
Seeking two milligrams
of atropine for sedation.
- Wait.
- Atropine?
Yeah, for sedation. Yes.
Atropine?
Do you mean Ativan?
Are you trying to k*ll
your patient, Paramedic Randy?
f*ck!
Ativan. Yes, Ativan.
Two milligrams for sedation.
Uh, ETA ten minutes.
Wonderful.
Try not to m*rder anyone
on the way.
f*ck.
It had to be Serano. f*ck!
sh*t! You scared me.
Oh, please.
Give me a f*ck' break.
Hey. You know, there are three
other hospitals in this area.
Why don't you drop your patients
in one of them, huh?
It's a busy night.
It's not up to me.
You take care of what,
one patient at a time?
I got 25 full beds in there,
man.
I got a waiting room
with an eight-hour wait.
I got emergency codes going off
upstairs constantly.
I got an administration
that won't hire enough staff,
and simultaneously tell me
that I gotta be f*ck' nicer?
I gotta be nicer
and I gotta be faster.
This whole building
is on my shoulders, man.
And now, now I gotta take time
to fix your mistakes.
Well, I got a better idea.
Maybe you take
your bullshit patients
somewhere the f*ck else.
Dr. Serano,
come to emergency, please.
Well, you'll excuse me.
I gotta go back
to never being done.
Alright, here we go.
- Let's go.
- Watch this.
-Yeah. Yeah.
-Can you handle the heat?
I got it, playboy. Come on, now.
Oh!
-Whoo!
-Oh, yeah?
-That's not a home run.
-That's a home run, man.
You didn't even make it
to the sidewalk.
Went right over your head.
The gutter is the home run line.
-That's bullshit.
-Oh, sh*t. That ain't bullshit.
That's a f*ck' home run.
-Don't be a hater.
-Go get your ball.
-I'm up.
-No. No. What...
Know something?
This is crazy that this is...
We been doin' this silly sh*t
for three years now.
You gon' miss me?
Oh...
We're gonna see each other.
We'll hang out.
What you mean?
We don't hang out.
Yeah, we do.
What are we doin' right now?
Dude, this don't count.
We're at work.
-This is fun, friendship.
-This is work.
-This is not hanging out.
-This is...
This is EMS sh*t, man.
I don't know sh*t about you.
We don't even talk like that.
What type of sh*t
you want me to ask?
Like, how's your mom doing?
Or...
if your lawn is being tended to.
If you have a lawn.
I don't even know...
My mom is dead
and I don't have a lawn.
And... I don't know. What else?
g*dd*mn, man.
We're just coworkers, man.
You act like I'm like
your best friend or something.
Come on.
Pfft.
-Oh, sh*t, I'm your best friend.
-Okay, who's up?
I have a lot of friends.
I have a lot of...
- lot of really... good friends.
- Medic 42, respond.
- Damnit. I'm his best friend.
- Medic 42 responding.
-That sucks.
-You're not my best friend!
-Jerry's my best friend.
-Who's Jerry?
-Who the f*ck is Jerry?
-Jerry's my cousin.
He lives in Tempe.
That's why we don't run.
Excuse us. Comin' through.
Excuse us. Thank you.
What happened?
Hit with a line drive in
the chest and passed out.
-I got it. Thank you.
-Are you his father?
No.
Uncle. Uh...
Uh, do you know if he has
any, uh, medical problems?
Uh, problemas...
Yeah,
none that he knows.
Did the AED shock him?
Yeah, twice now.
- Did he wake up at all?
- No.
Let's hold CPR.
Okay, he's in V-fib.
Charging.
Okay. Clear.
- Clear.
- Clear.
Okay, Mike, continue CPR.
How long was he down
before you started CPR?
We thought he just had
the wind knocked out of him--
-Yeah, how long exactly?
-I don't know, maybe a minute.
Okay, that's good enough.
h*! h*! h*!
We have a pulse.
- My chest hurts.
- Oh. Hey-hey, buddy.
What's his name?
Vicente, hey. My name's Randy,
and we're gonna be
taking care of you, okay?
Hey, spike that for me?
Get a blood pressure.
Am I gonna die?
We're gonna do everything
in our power
to make sure
that doesn't happen.
Alright?
My chest hurts.
There's no easy way
to say this, Vicente.
Your heart got hit
with a baseball
and it stopped.
That's why your chest hurts.
In the exact millisecond,
your heart got hit
just as it was contracting.
It's like the ball reached out
and sucker-punched your heart.
It's a one-in-a-million chance.
And as a matter of fact,
after all this,
I would go buy a lottery ticket
if I were you.
So... am I gonna die?
You're with us now, and our job
is to keep you healthy.
Okay? So just lie there
and relax.
BP's 90 over 60.
Okay.
That's not a bad start.
You're gonna feel
a little sting.
Gonna get an IV started.
One, two, three.
Okay.
Now... you having
any trouble breathing?
A little.
My chest hurts.
Any pain anywhere else?
No. Not really.
You have any medical problems?
- No.
- On any meds? Any allergies?
- No.
- No? Okay.
-How old are you again?
-Eleven.
- Are you married?
- What?
- No.
- I get it.
You're not ready to settle.
You wanna play the field.
You wanna keep
your options open.
That commitment is scary.
I get it. I'm with you.
Pound it.
Boom.
I'm gonna call the hospital.
You just lie there and relax.
So... am I gonna die?
You're gonna be alright.
Promise.
County ER, Medic 42.
Medic 42,
this is County. Go ahead.
County, Medic 42
en route to your facility
emergent with 11-year-old
patient post-cardiac arrest
due to a baseball to the chest.
Patient was down
for approximately a minute
before receiving CPR.
Two shocks by AED, one by me.
Patient is in sinus tach.
Conscious, alert,
oriented times three.
Blood pressure 90 over 60.
ETA approximately seven minutes.
County copies.
Medic 42 clear.
Hey, Vicente. So you're quite
the baseball player, huh?
What position
they have you playing?
My chest...
I feel funny.
Start CPR.
Charging.
-Clear.
-Clear.
Clear.
County ER, Medic 42.
County ER, Medic 42.
Medic 42, go ahead.
Update: Patient is back
in cardiac arrest.
Uh, ETA two minutes.
-What do you need?
-Let's get him outta here.
Comin' up.
Okay, we're good.
- Comin' through.
- Comin'. Excuse us.
-Watch out.
-What was his last pressure?
90 over 60. Pulse 110.
About 20 breaths a minute.
He was fine and then
just went right back into V-fib.
Uh, 11-year-old child, male,
hit in the chest
with a baseball.
Was down for about a minute
before they started CPR.
Shocked three times,
became alert and conscious
three times.
Went back into V-fib,
he was defibbed at 200.
One milligram of epi,
shocked again,
second milligram of epi.
He's currently asystolic.
- Do we have a name?
- Vicente.
That-that's all we--
That's all we have is Vicente.
You got half a name? Great work.
Hey.
Thought you'd wanna know.
Your patient didn't make it.
Thanks, Colette.
Yeah, that sucks.
You were great
with him, Randy.
No, I wasn't.
Yeah.
You were. You didn't make
a single mistake.
It's not your fault.
You did nothing wrong.
I made a big f*cking mistake.
I told the boy he was gonna live
and he died.
It's a rookie f*cking move,
and I knew better.
But God damnit, he just kept...
asking... ...and asking.
That boy died...
thinking I was gonna save him.
I have to live with that
for the rest of my life.
And that's...
why we build a wall.
Not to keep people out
but to keep sh*t like that
inside.
This job breaks everybody.
All we wanna do
is save your life.
Oh! sh*t!
Some of you...
don't make it easy.
You should be dead
five times over...
...but no matter
how many times
you brush with death...
you refuse to die.
Respect.
Others of you,
we do everything right...
...and you die on us anyway.
What the f*ck?
We see you struggling.
They can't deny you service...
but they can bankrupt you.
-Wait. Who had the blister?
-She did.
You? Okay.
We carry you on our backs,
every one of us,
and you crush us a little more
every day
until you grind us down
to a nub.
This is all part of the job,
so you deal with it.
You compartmentalize it.
You eat sh*t and shove it
down, down, down,
until one day you wake up
and you say,
you know what?
f*ck the patients.
f*ck the nurses.
f*ck the doctors.
f*ck this ratty-a*s hospital!
f*ck all the blood
and sh*t and puke.
f*ck your documentation!
f*ck the fakers.
f*ck the bullshit calls.
f*ck every shoplifter
who got caught
and pretended to pass out.
Ah! Ah!
-Come on.
-Get up.
f*ck the fire department.
f*ck the PD.
I know my rights.
I know my rights!
f*ck every 2:00 a.m. drunk
who think they know the law.
f*ck the bystanders,
the rubberneckers,
the lookie-loos.
f*ck the dead ones.
f*ck the live ones.
f*ck this bullshit pay.
f*ck me! f*ck you!
f*ck this job!
f*ck everyone,
except the kid who just wanted
to play baseball.
Exit paperwork.
You don't have to sign it.
- I'm goin' home.
- Randy...
Please don't go out like this.
Just leaving without even
finishing your last shift?
Don't go out like a chump.
Mike, turn on the lights.
Randy, come on, now. You...
You know I can't do that
unless we get a call.
Come on, man.
Alright.
One last time.
Medic 42,
emergency traffic.
-You gonna answer that?
-No.
Let another crew handle it.
Just...
You know what?
Drop me off at home.
What? m*therf*cker,
I don't know where you live.
Medic 42, respond.
I'll get it.
This is Medic 42 responding.
Come on, man.
One more and you're done.
Hey, what the hell?!
Alright, you grab the stuff.
I'll check this out.
-What the hell?!
-I got you!
Where's PD
to control these assholes?
Oh, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa!
What the f*ck?!
That's not good.
f*ck.
All dead in here.
Watch your step.
She's got a pulse.
She's breathing.
Shallow and ragged.
-Hold C-spine.
-Okay.
Okay. Let's roll her on three.
One, two, three.
Grab the collar.
Keep her breathing.
Oh, lucky...
lucky baby.
How'd you get so lucky? Huh?
Okay.
It's okay.
Hey-hey-hey-hey-hey-hey. Oh!
You're a lucky baby.
Stop that car! Whoa!
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
-Hey! Heads up! Heads up!
-Oh! Move!
Move!
Hey! Hey!
You almost k*lled us, as*h*le!
Hey, Jimmy. Take your truck,
park it perpendicular,
-block that ramp.
-Hold on. Wait. What?
Block off
the whole f*ck' freeway!
No one gets through!
Oh, sh*t.
County, Medic 42. Do you have
another unit incoming?
Negative.
Next available unit
is 15 minutes.
Want us to start a second unit?
Negative. We're taking
the baby with us.
- Good lung sounds.
- Good.
A crying baby is a healthy baby.
Alright, switch with me.
Your job is airway.
Keep her breathing at all costs.
Let's see if she takes an OPA.
Yeah, she took it.
No gag reflex.
Mom's got a lot of rib fractures
and head lacs.
She's gagging on
the OPA, but it's intermittent.
-Should I take it out?
-Yeah, take it out.
She's had too much trauma
already.
Talk to her.
See if she can obey commands.
Miss, can you raise
your right arm, please?
Alright, not bad.
Hang on there, Mom.
Ma'am, you're in an ambulance.
You were in a pretty bad wreck.
We have your child. She's okay.
We're taking you
to the hospital.
County ER, this is Medic 42.
Incoming to your facility,
emergent with two patients.
One a Level I,
the other a stable pediatric.
Medic 42, be aware,
we're on diversion.
We've got way too many
patients here.
You'll have to take them
to the ER at University.
Uh, negative. Negative.
She will not make it
to University.
Listen up. Got an approximately
30-year-old female,
a head-on collision, ejection,
massive damage to vehicle.
What's their GCS?
Well, right now it's a 14,
but...
Your patient
doesn't meet Level I criteria.
Yes, she does!
We're gonna be there
in five minutes,
so just page out a team.
Negative,
we are on diversion.
Do not come here, understand?
You need to reroute
to a different ER.
We are coming there
whether you like it or not!
So get ready for us!
-Hey, Astor?
-Yeah?
-Wanna take that baby...
-Got it.
...meet us inside?
Medic 42. What bay?
Two. But they're not happy.
Serano's on the warpath.
No one is happy.
No. No. No.
-Stop.
-No, no, no. Doctor, listen.
-This is a 30-something--
-No!
-A head-on collision.
-No. No. No.
The four other passengers
are DOA.
She is not a Level I criteria.
Do you have any idea how
expensive a Level I criteria is?
Any idea, you idiot?
Okay! This patient meets
all Level I criteria.
She's not even intubated!
You got her bagged?
What the hell is that?
This patient is dying, as*h*le!
-Now listen to my report!
-as*h*le?
How 'bout f*ck you, as*h*le!
-Come on! Come on!
-sh*t.
I will be happy to kick your a*s
and put you in a bed next to her
but you need to listen
to my report!
How 'bout instead
I call your supervisor,
we settle this right now.
Who the f*ck do you think
you are?
Excuse me?
-Who are you?
-This patient just went apneic
three times with no gag reflex
on the way to the hospital.
She's got a skull fracture.
She meets all Level I criteria.
Because last time I checked,
when a patient goes apneic
with no gag,
their GCS goes down to three.
Right?
And I just watched
this paramedic fight like hell
to save this woman's life
while caring for her child
and dodging incoming traffic
at the same f*cking time!
And all I see you doing
is standing there,
like a f*cking as*h*le,
with your d*ck in your hand,
arguing with him
about this patient
who is dying!
Your patient!
And if you refuse to treat her,
you'll lose
your g*dd*mn license.
Who are you?
I'm Dr. Romero.
I'm your new resident.
Oh, sh*t.
Well, Dr. Romero...
I look forward
to working with you.
We're gonna have so much fun.
Get the patient.
O-Okay, look.
You mean to tell me
you're a doctor?
Resident, but yeah.
But you told us
you were a paramedic.
No, I-I didn't. You said that.
I just didn't correct you.
Um... I never said that.
You-- That's what you said
when we first met you.
No. Why would I?
I'm a doctor, not a paramedic.
Hey, Dr. What's-your-face.
Grab a bedpan and come with me.
We're gonna have so much fun!
-Hmm.
-Whoa.
That's, uh...
Huh.
Hey.
Good news:
Patient's gonna live.
I mean, usually once
we drop 'em off
it's not our problem anymore.
But, um...
But it's good to, um,
it's good to know
she-she made it, you know?
Yeah.
Way to, uh, throw yourself
under the bus...
doctor.
Serano's gonna make your life
a living hell.
I know.
I never wanna be
that kind of surgeon.
Thanks for the coffee, doc.
She should have died.
She would have died in my care.
Right now, I'd be telling that
family that their mom is dead.
You know, I thought
I'd come out here today
and I'd meet the paramedics
and...
see what you do, how you work.
And I know you're sick
of your job.
I know you're burnt out.
I know you think
you don't make a difference.
But you made a difference today.
You did.
You saved her life.
And you saved her family.
You're the kind of doctor
I want to be.
Not a doctor.
Well...
if I ever need saving...
God, I hope it's you
that shows up.
Hey, one of those
is for Mike.
Not anymore.
That is a gift from the crews.
This is breakfast, on us.
Dispatch and the crews
chipped in after they heard
you told Dr. Serano
to go f*ck himself.
So this is a retirement gift.
Wow.
Come on.
Aw.
Now, get out of my substation,
civilian.
Keep your password safe.
If you have any trouble at all,
call IT right away.
If you have any trouble
with them, call me right away.
Okay.
Alright. Uh, now, to access
the forms
for the preauthorization...
You guys ever see anyone
choke to death?
You get the fist
like right under here,
and then it's just
straight back.
Ha!
Drowning's the worst way to go.
Absolute worst way to go.
Best way to die?
Decapitation.
What are you still doin' here?
Oh. Is that it?
That's it.
Come on. Let's get outta here.
Uh...
Hi.
So...
Well, as it turns out...
your close-out paperwork
was never properly...
filed.
-Thanks.
-Mm-hmm.
Hey, uh, maybe I could...
thank you properly sometime.
Take you out for lunch.
Alright.
And, uh, you will be in truck 42
with Mike today.
Hey, Randy!
That's right.
That's right.
Listen, man. Uh...
You gotta let me drive this one.
-Nope.
-Mike.
Not a chance.
You know the rules.
Okay? I wheel, you heal.
Come on, now.
Ain't sh*t changed.
"Let me drive
this one."
Yeah, the system
is still broken,
but what am I supposed to do,
quit trying?
I'm no hero.
But... the truth is...
I only feel alive
when you're about to die.
See you out there.
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Code 3 (2025)
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