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Doux Jesus (2025)

Comedy Movie Collection.
(Buddy/Dark/Black/Parody/Screwball/Slapstick/Sketch/Satire/Spoof/Mock/Comedians/etc.)

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Comedy Movie Collection.

Doux Jesus (2025)

Post by bunniefuu »

Birds chirping

- Gabriel!

Upbeat music

Oh, Gabriel!

She grumbles. - Oh,

Gabriel, come on!

He laughed. -

Be careful!

She grumbles.

- Gabriel!

Gabriel, come back here!

Gabriel! She

gasps.

Gabriel!

Shock

Slow motion scream

She screams.

He laughs.

Gabriel!

- This child is the devil!

This little boy is Gabriel.

Our treasure to all.

I know what you're thinking.

- Gabriel!

Effort

Shout of

Joy Bell

- What is he doing in a convent?

Surprised cry

- Gabriel!

- This time, I've got you!

He laughs

He taunts her.

- Gabriel!

That's enough!

Stop bothering them, you'll

drive them crazy.

Here is a place

of silence

and prayer.

Not... - A

playground.

I know. -

Exactly.

- I present to you Sister Lucie.

I really want to tell

you their story.

I warn you,

We must believe in miracles.

Soft music

Once upon a time there was

a sad, very sad convent.

Very, very, very sad.

- It seems that there are

sophisticated machines

who wash and dry clothes

at the same time.

- At the same time?

Are you sure?

- At the same time.

- Lust!

- There is a machine

that peels potatoes.

- Oh !

- Laziness!

They jump.

- It seems that there is...

Bells

- Quiet time!

She types a coded message.

- I know.

It just keeps growing.

Apparently there is a magic wax

that makes hair fall out.

- Oh! Really?

- Coquetry!

- Do you always have to

arrive by surprise?

- Yes !

A bell rings.

Heavenly Music

Intriguing music

It's not possible! What

are they doing?

At Saint Mary of the Resurrection,

We live in a contemplative

community.

This means that we spend most

of our time praying.

We have no contact with the

outside world, no visits.

And we obviously never go out.

Will it be the same old comedy?

Except once every two years

to see the doctor.

I repeat that you have

nothing to fear.

- Sister Constance has already gotten lost.

She didn't find the convent.

- It was ten years ago.

The police brought you back.

- It's true, they

were nice. - Yes.

So, what?

Enough teg... procrastinated.

- Procrastinated.

- Yes.

Everyone leave in five

minutes. Otherwise,

It's fasting until Easter.

They exclaim.

No stopping.

No exchange with anyone.

We move forward with our heads bowed and in silence.

If all goes well,

we will be back for vespers.

She blows.

-Are you okay, Sister Lucie?

She sighs. - Hot

flashes again.

It's nothing.

It will pass, I'm coming.

Soft music

Not approaching

-Are you still daydreaming?

- Oh, sorry, mother.

Sigh

This garden is sad.

We could plant there

Flowers, that would be

nice. - Of course.

And put a refreshment bar there,

a barbecue, to make kebabs.

You can also invite go-go dancers.

What do you think?

- You are right.

Austerity

and sobriety are the proofs

of our devotion to God.

- Never forget it.

Crash

She gasps.

- It's okay, the way is clear.

Intriguing music

Quick, quick, quick.

- Danger at 11 o'clock, we turn our heads!

Shock Me alive,

never!

- She retired.

- Do I take it? -At

85 years old,

It was about time.

- Miss Lanoix has been following us forever.

This is our only outing.

It's scheduled two years in advance.

-Listen.

He's the only doctor, so

it's that or nothing.

Funny music

- Sister Lucy.

Come on.

Dramatic music

Hop, hop, hop!

Courage.

Come on.

After that, it's up to you.

Pencil rustle

He inspires.

- When did these hot

flashes start?

- A few weeks.

- Anything else significant?

Night sweats? Unusual

weight gain?

- No, no. I don't think so, no.

Nasturtium soup isn't

going to make me fat.

Little laugh

He takes a deep breath

and sighs.

-Listen, even if it only

affects 1% of women,

I fear that these symptoms are the

consequence of early menopause.

- Sweet Jesus...

- It's quite surprising, I agree.

Not to say unexpected.

But hey,

In your case, I imagine that it

won't be too much of a problem.

- Why is that?

He laughs.

- Well...

Vows of abstinence, celibacy...

If you had wanted children, you

would have chosen another path.

Soft music

- Yes, that's right, yes.

To be honest, I had never

thought about it before.

Or a long, long

time ago.

-To you, Sister Anne-Rose.

How are you, Sister Lucy?

Shock

-How are you ?

- Is everything okay, Sister Lucy?

-It hurts a little, though.

She sighs.

Soft music

- A.

- Two.

- Three.

She sighs.

- Easy, darling.

He's restless.

Little laugh.

-Lord, Lord

They hum.

- Bye.

Intriguing music

Upbeat music

Panicked moans

- Excuse me, I have to

get off. Pull over.

- Sorry, I'm not a taxi driver.

Wait for the next stop.

She exclaims.

- Is it far?

-Terminus, madam.

Oh! Brake

squeal

Crash

- Oh!

Pedestrian priority,

for Christ's sake!

Can't you read?

Okay, come on!

-Lord, Lord

-Are you okay, sister?

She moaned in pain.

Come on. -It hurts

a little, though.

- End of line!

- Bye.

- Excuse me.

- Yes?

- Are you going back to Tremblay?

- No, I'm going back to the depot.

It's a strike.

- A strike?

- For our 14th month.

- The 14th m...

She stammers.

How am I going to get home?

- There must be some TERs left.

It's not sure.

This is minimum service today.

- TERs?

The station? - Straight

ahead!

- Excuse me...

Hubbub

- The way to the station?

- Straight ahead.

- Attention.

- Excuse me. I'm looking for the train station.

Rhythmic music

Sweet Jesus...

Doorbell

Squealing brakes

He screams.

- No, nothing's broken.

It's a miracle.

Not even a bump.

On the other hand, she is in the gas.

Yes, I'll pass it to you.

My sister.

My sister!

This is your Mother Superior.

She's not easy, the mother.

- Hello ?

- What got into you?

- But I don't know.

Sob Now I'm

stuck here.

I'll never be able to get back.

Never, never, never.

There are men everywhere...

They exclaim. - But so lucky

to be in the city.

Enjoy!

- Take a regional train. There

should be a few of them.

- Oh, she's going to take

the TER! She exclaims.

My God! - No,

but not the TER.

Sob I don't

feel well.

I feel that the Lord wants

to tell me something.

But what?

What ?

Soft music

Sebastian?

-Sister Lucy?

Sister Lucy?

She hangs up.

She said "Sebastien"

and hung up.

- Sbastien, who is that?

- Sebastian?

- Do you know him?

- Yes, but it's been a long

time since I've seen him.

He was the nicest

boy in the world.

Dramatic Music - Fill

the bag. Hurry!

Go!

-Put your weapon down!

g*nsh*t and scream

He moaned.

-Come on, let's get out of here!

Don't move, you.

- It's impossible.

Sebastian would be incapable of doing that.

- I guess he's changed.

Are you coming? I promised.

to the Mother Superior to escort

you back to the TER.

- Yes yes.

Intriguing music

Soft music

SNCF Announcement

The music becomes intense.

The music builds.

The music becomes soft again.

Train roar

Joyful cries

- We're going to win!

We're going to win!

- Do you have a match?

- It's the final. - They're

noisy, sorry.

- No, it's a change from the convent.

Here, young man. This

will bring you luck.

- Well, thank you, that's so kind.

Shall we take a selfie?

- A what?

- A selfie.

A photo.

- Ah.

Sorry, I'm not very up to date.

Little laugh

Is this your camera?

- No, it's a cell phone.

Are you kidding me?

- No way.

I had never seen one in real life before.

- But no, seriously?

- It's forbidden where I live.

- Shall we take the first

selfie of your life?

- Yeah. She

laughs.

Trigger

They laugh.

- We're not bad.

- She's not bad. She's good.

- We can do

lots of other stuff.

Go online, make videos,

watch movies.

Listen to music, order,

make friends, travel.

-That's starting to be a lot.

Already, between prayers, readings,

the vegetable garden,

laundry, cooking.

My days are full.

- By the way, we wanted to ask you.

Well, I know, it's stupid.

We always wonder how you

manage without...

Finally, from...

Finally...

- Ah! About that?

- Yes !

- I can't do without it.

I live

a love story with Christ.

I live for him, through him.

My destiny is in his hands.

- Ooh, there! Are you serious?

It's forbidden

to think that. No phallocratic

dictatorship.

- Easy.

- For me, it's not the same

thing. It's about our Lord.

- Yes, it's the same thing.

He's just a dude.

You have to remain master of your destiny,

don't let men decide.

- Ah OK.

SNCF Announcement

Soft music

Doorbell

Door

Excuse me.

Do the Froberts still live here?

- I don't know.

- Ah.

- Which is 8,312 euros and twelve

cents. The interest.

- All that?

- Yes.

She laughs.

- Oh, there, there.

Thank you so much.

- It's your money. It's been

there for a long time.

- Oh yes.

THANKS.

- Following !

Upbeat music

She exclaims.

Wow!

Video game sound effects

- And here's to you.

She exclaims.

- Wonderful!

Thank you so much.

- There you go. It's ready to use.

- Can I ask you a favor?

- Of course.

- He's still as handsome as ever.

Little laugh

- Yes.

According to this article, the

case goes back several months.

Employees and customers

were scared to death.

"Before 8 a.m., two

hooded men..."

- Ah, hooded! Mmh.

This is different from what the police officer said.

-Put the money in the bag!

He moaned.

Come on, hurry up!

- Yes, yes.

-Come on!

-Put down your weapon!

g*nsh*t and screams

-Oh, sh*t!

Come on, let's get out of here!

- I should speak to the

supermarket manager.

Do you have his address?

- Without his name, it seems complicated to me.

- Ah. - Unless a

miracle happens.

- Please ?

- Excuse me?

- Come on. Courage, Lucie.

What did I miss?

-We are at w*r.

Rhythmic music

Broken glass

Panicked cries

Laughter

Panicked cries

- But it's the apocalypse.

She gasps.

Intriguing music

Sizzling

She exclaims.

Sweet Jesus!

She's panting. I

have to get out!

Crash

She moaned.

-How are you ?

How are you ?

-It hurts a little, though.

Horn

She sighs.

Soft music

Oh, Lord!

Tell me what I did to

deserve all this.

-That's not nice, indeed.

- Eh ?

Who is it? -It's

me.

- Me? Me who?

-Me, me.

- Hello ?

Is anyone there?

There it is, Lord, I'm going crazy.

-I won't bother answering

that.

- Lord ?

-I'm listening to you.

- Is that you, Lord?

-Religions are a great mystery.

- Sweet Jesus, Mary, Joseph!

But how is this possible?

-No Jesus Mary Joseph

in your contacts.

Intriguing music

- Lord, I need your help.

I jumped in without thinking.

Do you know where Sebastian is?

-Sorry, I don't see Sbastien

in your contacts.

- Oh, I'm lost, Lord.

Sobs And then,

I'm tired...

-Then we have to sleep.

- I don't know where I'm going to spend the night.

-Would the Garden of Eden

suit you? - Very funny.

-The Garden of Eden is

only 450 meters away.

- Is that all?

Moan of exertion

Oh...

How charming.

The phone rings.

Door

She slams the

door. Phone

- Convent of Saint Mary

of the Resurrection.

- Sister Charlotte? It's Lucie.

- Lucie? -Yes,

Lucie.

- No, I don't see.

- It's not possible! Lucie.

- I'm sorry, but no.

- Lucie. Sister Lucie!

- Oh, Sister Lucy!

She laughs. But

where are you?

Everyone is worried.

- No, everything is fine.

I am...

Fallow, that's it.

She exclaims.

- Oh, lucky you!

Bell and alarm

Ah!

Damn, it's time for silence.

It's always the same. That's

when it gets interesting.

Soft music She taps

out a coded message.

She sighs.

Key beeps

She types a coded message.

Key beeps

She types a coded message.

Key beeps

Laugh Charlotte taps

out a coded message.

Intriguing Music

"Words" FR

David

-Words don't come easy to me

How can I find a way

To make you see I love you?

Words don't come easy

- I want to make sure

it's the right time.

- Or the good boy?

- I have no doubt about that.

A.

- Two.

- Three.

Door

- And I forbid you

to see this boy again!

- I hate you!

If Dad was here,

he would agree.

- Don't waste your life with a thug.

Let me see you more

hang around his city!

- You're talking nonsense!

You don't know him!

Sad music

It's you I won't see again.

Sobs

We're going to leave,

with Sbastien.

We're going far away, both

of us. - That's it.

Start by going to your

room or I'll slap you.

another one !

Door

- We're both leaving, Sbastien.

-Are you sure, Lucie?

- Do you love me?

-Yes.

- So, yes, I'm sure.

Meet us on deck at 6 p.m.

She sighs.

Exasperated sigh

- No calls, Sister Charlotte? - Nothing

since Sister Lucy last night.

- And she tells me that with

her delighted nursery look!

- Excuse me.

I need to speak to the man who

was the victim of the robbery.

- The director?

- Yes.

- Not here today.

- Ah.

Could you give me his address?

- We don't have the right.

It's in the rules.

- Excuse me.

- Sorry.

- Coke and apple.

- 3.50 euros.

If you buy nothing...

- Yes. Yes, yes, yes.

- Are you sure?

- Oh! Oh, potato, no!

That.

I have to see this gentleman.

This is very important.

- It's the rules!

Five euros.

- That's not nice.

- You forgot your condoms, sister.

- It's for the poor.

After all, they too have the

right to... There you go.

Embarrassed Moan

Light Music

She sighs.

Lord, it's over.

I will never find this gentleman again.

This stubborn mule didn't

want to help me.

-That's not nice, indeed.

- You want

What to Mr. Hunault?

- Mr. Hunault?

- It's the director.

I know where he lives.

I can accompany you to his house.

- Would you do that?

- Well, no.

But for 20 euros, yeah.

Wow!

- Promise made.

Satisfied moan

Come on. -Your

turn.

- Yes.

She sighs.

She expires.

- Well, you're not ringing?

- He's hiding something.

Why would he trust me?

- Mmh.

Tell him he lied and

he's going to hell.

- I'm not sure.

- So what?

- So,

It's a lie. Lying

is sin.

- To know the truth,

you have to lie.

If you want, I'll teach you.

For 50 euros.

- No. Sorry, but that's impossible.

- Too bad for you.

Good luck, bye.

- No, wait!

Uh...

Perhaps for a noble cause,

I can make a...

a small gap.

Soft music

A small exception. No?

-Listen to me carefully.

When lying, keep your head up.

Not too much though.

You take your time

and you don't blink.

Once launched,

you never stop, you

go all the way.

You lie at all costs.

Go ahead, lie to me.

- Uh...

Well... She

sniffs.

She sighs.

You...

I...

No, I don't have this...

It's not coming out, I have no ideas.

- Uh...

Explain to me why I'm white,

blond, with blue eyes.

- You are black.

- Lost.

I'm white, with blond curls,

like my mother.

And I have blue eyes,

like my "reup".

- Not at all.

- But yes.

In my family, we have blue eyes.

Look at me carefully.

Majestic Music

It's because of our origins.

We are Norwegian, from Trndelag,

north of Oslo.

- Do you speak Norwegian?

He speaks Norwegian.

Amazing !

He laughed. - But you're

really bad.

I'm lying to you.

- Really? - I'm talking

nonsense.

I'm black, I'm not Norwegian.

- Ah, no, but really...

Extremely gifted.

Doorbell

She blows.

Beep

-Yes?

- Yes hello.

We are developing a home

confession service...

-Of confession?

- Quite.

It is important to

confess your sins

to keep his commitment

to the Lord.

-Only priests

can forgive our sins in

the name of Christ.

Light music

- That was before.

-But before what?

-Before the crisis.

There are not enough

priests anymore,

so... they delegate.

You have to live with the times.

The women fought

against this phallocratic dictatorship.

Why should only priests

hear confessions?

The Church has set up training courses.

To train us, too, to...

confess.

She hangs up.

Gate mechanism

Shout of joy

We did it!

- There you go, you know how to lie.

- I'm proud of myself.

It's mixed.

I hope the Lord will not

be angry with me.

He laughs.

- THANKS.

Message received five out of five.

She sighs.

Good morning.

- Hello. The Lord

sent you.

My husband is depressed,

he needs to confess.

Soft music

Exasperated sigh

Jeans ?

Let me introduce you to

Sister Lucie. - Hello.

- Good morning.

- It's beautiful here.

- Do you think so?

Did you know that each color

of rose has a meaning?

- Really? - Yes.

The red one,

it's love, it's passion.

The yellow,

it's joy, it's...

it's success.

And white is virginity,

it is purity.

It's innocence.

- And this one?

The music turns dark.

- Betrayal.

The lie.

Now that's a bit ridiculous.

It's to please

my wife.

- I'm listening to you, my son.

He sighs. - It's not

easy, sister.

- The Lord does not judge.

He listens

and forgive.

- I cheated on Marie!

With an employee who just arrived.

- Uh, adultery is a serious offense.

Strive to remain faithful.

- Ah, yes, but...

He sighs.

- Nothing else?

- Uh, no, I... I don't see.

- Yes, of course. Look carefully.

- Well, it's true that,

thinking about it,

before my employee,

there had already been the postwoman.

The little nurse.

A trucker.

We only live once.

She sighs.

- And...

Otherwise, apart from these numerous deviations,

at your work,

Did anything bad happen to you?

- I stole from the state, sister.

Exasperated sigh

I lied on my profit

declarations.

- I slept at my grandmother's.

- Pardon ?

- No, nothing. I forgive

you, I forgive you.

Did anything more serious

happen to you?

Really more serious, I mean.

- I lied, sister.

- Yes !

- I lied by omission.

-That's good! That's

nice... No!

This is not good at

all. This is bad.

This is very, very, very bad.

She sighs.

I'm listening to you.

- A few months ago,

I was robbed at the supermarket.

- It's not possible!

Dramatic music

- Fill the bag.

Come on, hurry up!

Empty your cash into this f*cking bag!

You don't move!

- The one who held the weapon

and shot the policeman

had a tattoo.

- A tattoo?

- Yes!

A man threatened me so that

I wouldn't tell the police.

It's shameful to say, but he

scared the hell out of us.

Maybe because of me,

an innocent person will go to prison.

- Sebastian.

- Who ?

- Thank you. And well done!

She sighs.

Light sigh

- Maybe she was kidnapped?

Women are stolen to be

used as sex sl*ves.

- Are you feeling well?

Oh, that bag weighs a dead donkey!

- I just put five sausages,

two cheeses,

six jars of honey, about

twenty compotes

and four bottles of my soup

with nasturtium flower.

- Lucky!

- And radishes,

for Sister Constance's diet.

- We're not leaving

hiking, either.

She coughs.

Sister Solange, I entrust you

with the keys to the house.

I'm counting on you.

They exclaim.

I will bring my lost sheep

back to the fold.

Sister Constance, Sister Marthe,

heads held high and in rhythm.

Upbeat music

Don't take everything

literally either.

The Lord simply invites

his faithful to be wary

carnal and culinary pleasures.

There you go. It's just sausage.

-Obviously.

- Ladies. Ticket.

She exclaims.

- A man!

Funny music

- Well, yes, a man.

So, my sisters.

Are you afraid of the

wolf? He laughed.

- I don't see a wolf. Just

a turkey in uniform.

He clears his throat.

He sighs.

- THANKS.

- Hurry! We're very late!

Hello. - Hello.

Kisses, Mom.

- Kisses. Well, say, Simon!

My kiss, anyway.

Well, then? Have a

nice day, my love.

- How they've grown!

- Lucie?

School bell rings

She exclaims.

What are you getting yourself into now?

- It's Sebastian. I

can't abandon him.

- He didn't hesitate.

It's been 20 years. You don't know him anymore.

Time has not stopped.

- Time doesn't change anything.

An innocent man faces prison.

- An innocent?

Are you sure? - Yes,

I have proof.

- It's still sad.

We never see each other again.

You hardly know my husband,

my children.

I don't understand, actually.

How you can waste your life...

- Mathilde, we're not going to start again.

- You're right, excuse me.

I just miss you.

- You too.

Little laugh

- Why didn't you tell

us you were here?

- You know very well why.

- After so many years, you still

hold a grudge against him?

Your Christ forgives on the cross

and you don't forgive your mother?

Bells Soft

Music

- Do you have any news from

Sbastien's sister?

- The last time I had her,

she was moving to Doulcon.

- At the green lake?

- Her husband is from there.

- You could

lend me your car?

- My car? Oh, dear.

It's not my car,

it's Xavier's.

He holds it

dear, so...

- Please.

Bumps

This car is noisy.

"Words" FR

David

Sobs

Sad music

Sebastian, if you

abandon me too...

A,

two, three!

Frantic moan

She coughs.

What do I do now?

Desperate sigh Then

that doesn't work!

We are in trouble, Lord!

-I confirm, we're in deep sh*t.

Melancholic music

She sighs.

She sighs.

- Little beast of God.

Make someone stop,

please.

She blows.

Horn

"One Hour To Love Me"

Craig Gildner

-How are you ?

She sighs.

Do you mind if we take a break?

- No. I'll take the opportunity

to wash up.

My dress is in a terrible state.

- Hi, Kevin.

- Hi, Mike.

- Good evening, ladies.

- My sister.

Intriguing music

She sighs.

- Sweet Jesus...

I'll never get all that back.

Good morning.

Majestic Music

Roaring

Sweet Jesus.

Buzzing She

laughs.

Roaring

Light music

Little panicked cries

Oh, it's...

She moaned.

Exasperated sigh

- What a disaster for customers,

this breakdown.

- You said it, darling.

Someone's knocking.

- Ladies?

- Oh, but... - I'm

stuck inside.

- What is she doing here?

- Are you completely naked?

- I'm stuck inside.

She hits. Light

music.

- So, what's it like?

- Good, the bra!

-It's a big change from

my nun outfit.

- Attention !

The music builds.

Pretty woman!

- Julia Roberts! Enthusiastic

shouts

Siren

Doorbell

- Good evening, my daughter.

I am Mother Henriette.

This is Sister Martha, Sister Constance.

We are sisters of Sister

Lucy, your sister.

Embarrassed laughter

- Dear mother-in-law.

My sisters, a little wine?

- No. - Just

a drop.

- No. - The blood

of Christ!

- No way.

- Good...

- I don't want to seem like

I'm making generalizations,

But often our departed sisters

turn to their families.

They reconnect emotionally

with their previous lives.

- Mmh. - Before

their vows.

-Obviously.

- You surprise me.

- Sister Lucy

is maybe in the area.

She is waiting for the right

moment to manifest herself.

- Well, yes, thank you.

I need to call my daughters.

Can I borrow the phone?

- Of course.

Awkward laugh -

Right there.

- Okay, let me recap.

You got caught soliciting.

You have 7,000 euros in cash

and condoms, but you're

religious,

and a hand dryer burned your dress?

- Yes, that's exactly it.

- You know, you're wrong

to take it like that.

I can make your life hell if I want.

- Finally, since I'm k*lling

myself to tell you...

He knocks.

- Yes?

- Well, I checked her identity.

She is indeed religious.

- Oh! Thank you,

sir! - Ah!

- Anyway !

What a humiliation!

- Are you sure?

- Formal. I had one of her sisters.

It's... - Mother

Henriette?

- What ?

Okay, Sister Charlotte, refocus.

For soliciting?

Are you sure?

- Very safe. That's what

the police told me.

- f*cking your mother.

-Excuse me?

- Didn't they say anything else?

- Don't worry, Mother, that was before.

- Before what? - Before

I explain to them

that they were necessarily on the wrong track.

Sister Lucy, I know her very well.

There is absolutely no

way she is soliciting.

on a rest area...

- Yes, good. So?

-So,

They apologized.

Oh yes, very correct. Oh!

And they released her.

- There you go! Why didn't

you say that earlier?

And where is she?

- Who ?

- Your sister!

- What's my sister doing in there?

- Sister Lucy! Sister

Lucy, where is she?

She exclaims.

Tongue click

Damn! I didn't think to ask them.

- Well, there, Lord, excuse me,

but she is completely stupid.

Listen to me, Sister Charlotte.

In the future,

you never touch the

phone again!

She hangs up.

- Hello ?

- You seem upset, Mother.

- Upset? Not at all.

One sister was arrested for soliciting,

another is an idiot.

Other than that, everything is fine.

So, we get our fingers out,

we find Sister Lucie

and we bring her back home, quickly!

"Get Down"

Deluxe

She sighs. - May the peace

of the Lord be with you.

We smile!

Trigger

Scream

Howl

Doorbell

I would like to try the

hair removing wax.

Doesn't it hurt too much?

- No way.

Echo

Howl

Ringing

Soft music

- Watch out!

- Oh.

Embarrassed sigh

Hello, Nathalie.

Lucie. Do you remember me?

Sebastian's friend.

- What are you doing here?

- I'm looking for your brother.

I came across the country to come

here. I have to talk to him.

I can prove his innocence.

- Oh yeah?

Well, you're wasting your time.

We have no further news.

Since the supermarket, he has disappeared.

We are living a nightmare.

- I'm sorry.

Nathalie. Do you remember?

if Sbastien has a tattoo

on his forearm?

- I don't quite understand, Lucie.

You disappear for 20 years,

then you reappear?

Are you religious anymore?

- Yes, still.

- Why did you do that?

When you entered the convent,

Sebastian has gone crazy,

you know that?

He did anything.

- He didn't even try to...

- You destroyed his life!

Melancholic music

You're forgetting my brother.

Sobs

- Lord !

Lord, are you there?

If Nathalie is telling the truth,

that means I'm a monster.

Beep

-I'm not sure I understand.

She sniffs.

Dark Music

Anguishing organ music

Crash

Who's the nicest one?

- It's Lulu!

- Tour

general shots!

Rock Music Cries

of Joy

He exclaims. -To

your loves!

- Hold.

- Well, that one is generous.

Well, quite a descent,

huh! She sighs.

-It's been a long time since I've had a drink.

Because me,

I was a nun.

I am not anymore.

Resigned.

I don't deserve it.

- Hey! For Lulu who

is more religious,

hip, hip, hip...

- Hooray!

He laughs.

- Where are you sleeping tonight?

I live next door.

- Stop, hands off. No, but!

Even though I'm more religious,

I have promises I have to keep.

- Actually, you're still religious.

- No. He

laughs.

-

Otherwise.

- She still is.

- I'm not anymore, I tell you!

My banana.

Where is my banana?

It was stolen from me!

My banana was stolen!

Move over!

My banana...

Rhythmic music

You there!

Stop!

Fracas

Larsen

She catches her breath.

Larsen

She gasps.

- Welcome to the world of the living.

Bells

- I will be grateful to you for life.

You saved my child.

- It's not me you should thank.

The Lord put Lucie

in my path. - Ah.

Yes of course.

- Sister Henriette!

Sister Henriette!

You are wanted.

- Ah!

I have to leave you.

Go in the peace of Christ.

And no more nonsense, Lucie.

Promise?

- Promise.

- Yes ?

Melancholic music

- What a pain!

Couldn't you have been rescued

by someone else?

What's this? - A gift from

Sister Henriette.

She exclaims.

- I love him, Mom.

- Sister Henriette?

- But no! Sebastian.

-It will pass.

What did you think?

That you were going to run away,

both of you?

You're so naive!

This boy doesn't care about you.

What else?

The music covers his words.

Beeps

- Cuckoo !

She's awake, our naughty girl.

She sighs.

- How long have I been here?

- Four years.

Yes, it goes by quickly.

We have a new president.

She is a woman and she is black.

Little exclamation

And we won Eurovision.

- It's not possible.

She laughed. - Of course

it's not possible.

I make you

to walk !

You slept for two days.

- Two days!

- We warned the convent.

Your sisters are here.

She sighs.

You're free. But be careful,

no more alcohol.

Because the Lord is not happy.

He punished you well.

She cheats.

Mmh.

- Mother Henriette is going to beat me up.

Light music

Oh, no!

He took my money and my phone.

Sigh of relief

She sighs.

Forgive me, Lord, for having gone astray.

She exclaims.

- Sweet Jesus.

So, one of two things.

Either you come back with us to Tremblay

and we draw a line under

this unfortunate affair.

Either you continue your quest,

Well, call it what

you want.

But then, let's be clear,

you will find the door closed when

you return to the convent.

Have I been clear enough?

- Clear as holy water.

- All that for a thug

who didn't give you

news for years?

You're losing your mind, Sister Lucy.

Remember that you have taken a

vow of fidelity and obedience

towards Jesus Christ.

- But I haven't forgotten anything.

But I also know that Sebastian

is innocent.

and that the Lord sends

me here to save him.

- Sin of pride.

It's called the sin of pride.

- Well, yes.

Sin of pride.

And you know what?

I even learned to lie.

Cry of admiration

And I drink.

She exclaims.

I steal and I swear.

- Okay, that's enough now!

Lord God Mary Joseph!

- Ah!

You swear too.

In a convent, locked up,

deprived of everything,

It's easy to have principles,

to preach.

To keep his promises to the Lord.

In real life, it's

a different story.

She sighs.

And I'm tired of being

treated like a child.

I'm in premenopause!

- Good.

I have a friend who has a monastery

not far from here.

We will sleep there.

You can think about it until tomorrow.

She hits.

Lower.

He exclaims.

- Oh !

The opportunities are so rare to

share our table and our bed

with colleagues.

- Oh! That will be perfect for Sister Lucy.

A little austerity will do

him the world of good.

The door slams.

She sighs. Teenage

crisis.

-At his age?

Little laugh

Sister Martha sings Amazing Grace.

- They make their

own olive oil.

It's a ritual, I think.

- It's the heart charged with emotion

that we welcome you into

our humble monastery.

Our cups are full.

Very full.

- Oh, yes!

- SO,

let's empty them.

- Let's empty them! Let's empty them!

Let's empty them!

Moan of pleasure

- Mmh.

Tongue click

He sighs.

Little exclamation

Finally, Father Benedict.

What are you doing?

- Henriette...

-That's enough. Pull yourself together.

We're not children anymore.

- We are not children anymore.

We are no more. -

We are no more.

- Not even a little?

- Not even a little.

She sighs.

Big idiot, you will never change.

- Never.

There is a knock.

- Sister Lucy?

Sister Lucy, please stop

acting like a child.

Since that's how it is, I'm leaving.

Too bad !

Father Benedict has found you

more suitable business.

I put them there.

Goodbye. I'm leaving.

Good night !

Not

- I see your feet under the door.

- I read the report of your

doctor's appointment.

I understand your doubts and your pain.

She exclaims.

My child.

Sobs

It is a huge sacrifice

for the Lord

than giving up the idea of

being a mother one day.

But we must accept it with love.

And humility.

She sobs.

This is proof that we remain

faithful to him.

She sniffles.

Oh...

I understand that in such

a special moment,

you wanted to find this boy.

What do you believe?

We all have a Sebastian

buried somewhere.

- I need to know why he didn't

come to the bridge.

- I understand.

Never forget that prayer

is there to guide you.

Eh ?

- Thank you, mother.

Heavenly Music

She sighs. What

do I do?

Give me a sign. Just one.

Please, Lord.

Shock The goose

cackles.

She exclaims.

- Sister Lucy?

I can cover you until

Assumption.

Afterwards, I will inform the bishopric.

You will answer to the diocese.

- Thank you, mother.

But why?

- Let's say that love between

two beings is sacred.

It is a grace.

Find out how God wants

you to love yourself.

Find the answer to your

question, too.

Sister Constance and Sister Marthe will come.

It's more prudent.

Sister Lucy remembered

that Sebastian

spent the summer with his

grandparents, in Angeot,

a small village on the

road to Compostela.

It was Sebastian's favorite

place in the world.

That was good,

All the nuns dream of making

this pilgrimage one day.

"Stand By Me"

Ben E. King

- Can I ask you a question?

- Of course.

- Do you ever have doubts?

- From him? No. Never.

But to find Sbastien, yes.

Birds chirping

Do you hear?

- I hear the birds. It's

spring singing.

Low hum Disturbing

music

- Pull over!

Quickly !

Cries of pain

- My foot is stuck.

- Sister Constance!

Let me do it.

She's crying.

Horn

Panicked cries

- My God, you're going

to get crushed!

- Go for it !

- Lord Jesus, save us!

Save us, poor sinners!

Squealing brakes

Brake whistling

She gasps.

Thank you, Lord.

She sighs.

- We continue our daily soap opera.

Today, you will discover

an unusual nun.

Here is a day in the life of Sister Lucy.

Sister Lucy walks

for miles

with two of his comrades,

without any particular reason

or specific destination.

Another surprising fact,

A train driver claims

to have seen the nun

stop his train which was heading

straight towards them.

So, miracle or urban legend?

Our special correspondent

went to meet Sister Lucy.

-The train stopped because

it had good brakes.

-Why are you walking?

For world peace?

Against hunger, poverty?

-Not at all. We're walking

to find Seb...

-Inner peace.

We walk to find

inner peace.

-Exactly.

Our movement is called

"En Marche"! - Really?

-How long have you been locked up?

-The convent is not a prison.

I joined it about twenty

years ago.

-And today's world has changed?

- Ah, yes. A lot, even.

-Have you discovered things

you didn't know?

-Oh, full. Full!

I discovered that...

Melancholic music

Sometimes it's useful to know how to lie.

If the Lord gave a color

to each rose,

It was to find our way

around our feelings.

I discovered that we could fight against

the phallocratic dictatorship.

I discovered

that a kebab was almost

a thousand calories.

And above all,

I discovered that people all need

to believe in something.

It doesn't matter whether it's

a god or a real person,

They just need someone

to inspire them.

Which gives them confidence and

the desire to be better.

I have deep conviction

that we must love each other very much.

And help each other, too.

-What will be your next step?

-Yes! We're following the path

of the son of thunder!

-Saint-Jacques de Compostelle.

-Yes, to Angeot!

-All that remains is for us

to wish you a good trip.

Soft music

-Well then!

It's you I saw in the

newspaper! - Yes.

- Oh, your words were so...

It made me feel so good!

Embarrassed laughter

Can I walk with you for a bit?

- If you want.

- What are you eating?

- Flammekueche.

A local specialty.

- What are you eating?

- Tielle from Ste.

Local specialty.

- Can I taste

it? He nods.

Slight hubbub

What are you eating?

- Strasbourg sausage.

- I wonder what all these

people are doing with us.

- I wonder how they make

their pralines.

- They need spirituality,

Sister Lucy.

Of love and spirituality.

Calm music

- In two days, it's

Assumption Day.

Alarm

She sighs.

Alarm

She types a coded message.

Soft music

She sighs.

- Good night, Sister Lucy.

Insect stridulations

- Where are you, Sebastian?

Bells

Hubbub

- Come on, let's go!

She exclaims.

She sighs and gasps.

Heavenly Music

Sebastian.

- Meet me at kindergarten.

Children's hubbub

Here, my dear.

When I saw you in the

newspaper, it...

Good idea to meet here.

- I wasn't sure you were watching TV.

and even less that you understand.

I gave it a try.

-It feels weird.

- A little, yeah.

Embarrassed laugh

-It's okay, you look good.

Are you happy?

- Happy ?

I don't know that.

It's different from the

life I imagined.

- Sbastien Frobert?

Dark Music

I'm going to ask you to follow me.

- You betrayed me?

- But no.

Action Music

- Move over!

Move over!

- Move!

Crash

Squealing brakes

- Get in, quick!

- f*ck...

He gasps. -

Oh, f*ck.

- Do you think I betrayed you?

I don't know this man.

- And this car?

- It's my dad's.

- Eh ?

- Are you taking me hostage?

So cool!

-Are you okay? Not at all!

Why did you steal this car?

- I thought he was going to sh**t you.

Siren

She exclaims.

Sweet Jesus.

Siren -

sh*t.

- Oh, chanm!

Live on YouTube.

- Lucie, I am innocent.

- Then surrender and tell the truth.

Rap music

- Put your weapon

down! Shot!

- What are you doing?

- Start.

- What? - Start

it, damn it!

Siren

- I didn't know anything.

Some guys from the city asked

me to accompany them.

- Show your arms.

- What?

- Show your arms!

I promise you that you will be

exonerated if you surrender.

I have a witness.

- Too late. They blamed

everything on me.

No one will believe me anymore.

- I ran away from my convent.

I came across the country to find you.

I didn't do all this for nothing.

- I didn't ask you anything.

You made a choice 20 years ago.

We could have stayed together.

- You're the one who abandoned me!

Sad Music Why didn't you

come to the bridge?

I wanted to die. You

broke my heart.

- I beg your pardon.

I didn't come because...

Because I was scared!

Fear of leaving, of leaving

my family for...

- For me? - But

we were kids.

We would have returned after two days.

I came to see you to explain.

Your mother told me you didn't

want to hear from me anymore.

That you had entered the convent.

To the convent!

I couldn't believe it.

- I didn't know that.

- You can't make up 20 years, Lucie.

I'll manage on my own,

I don't need you.

- National Gendarmerie!

- It's over.

I'm going down.

He sighs. I have

no choice.

- Hands behind your head!

Go to bed!

- Sebastian!

- A.

Little laugh

- Two.

- Three.

Sad music

- Sebastian!

- Hands behind your head!

They gasp.

- Do you want to do me a favor?

Never try to save me again.

They laugh.

They sigh.

He sighs.

- Sebastian?

It's not fair

to save you that I made this trip.

But also to prove to myself that

I had made the right decision.

That I had made the right choice.

By choosing Him.

- I would never have been able

to compete with this guy.

The competition would have been tough.

- And now ?

- NOW ?

"Words" FR

David

Not approaching

- I have excellent news

about Sbastien.

- Ah!

- His lawyer is optimistic.

Thanks to all this media hype

and his live confession,

The case caused a lot of noise.

Sbastien will be exonerated, that's for sure.

The Lord has heard our prayers.

- Finally !

- Regarding the other matter...

Clearing throat

- Yes ?

- My child, there is still time.

For the last time, are you sure

of what you are saying?

- Finally !

I'm telling you

we just kissed!

You're annoying.

- Boring? -

Seriously!

It's crazy not to believe me.

I would remember it,

if we had done it.

- It's certain, we remember it.

This is...

Well, I guess, because, obviously,

I don't know anything about it.

Sweet Jesus...

I'll call the bishopric right away.

Oh, what a story!

But what a story!

She sighs.

- I think the Mother Superior

is a little lost, Lord.

-We would be at least, Lucie.

Laughter and a little moan

They sing I Say A Little Prayer

by Aretha Franklin.

-The moment I wake up

Before I put on my makeup

-Makeup!

I say a little prayer for you

-While combing my hair, now

- Virgin, menopausal, and

she gives us a baby.

I'm willing to swallow all

the snakes in the world,

but I'm not a fool.

- Mom, it's a miracle.

- Oh yes, of course!

And I'm the Pope.

- Oh, stop.

They continue to sing.

- Gabriel...

- This baby you

see is Gabriel.

- The Church welcomes

you with great joy.

- Do you remember? The guy who was

frolicking, at the beginning.

- In His name,

I mark you with the cross, which

is the sign of Jesus,

our savior.

- And here it is, my story

comes to an end.

I know what you're wondering.

And his father, in all this?

I told you to believe

in miracles.

Applause

"I Say A Little Prayer"

Aretha Franklin

- One, two, three, sun!

Mmh...

She screams.

Sister Charlotte!

- Oh, no! No, she pushed me!

Outraged cry

Soft music

Upbeat music