01x04 - A Lousy Haircut

[bunniefuu]

private eyes Cut germs

and viruses down to size

Busy defending all the nerve

endings They got

gusting nerves

in the birds

Keep it

insane

Like a love ship Like a love ship I

seek

and tricks

I seek and tricks

Inside the body and mind

From the tip of the nose to the behind

They're the protectors of the

city of Hector I

seek and tricks

Oh, yeah!

Nothing better than a meat sale

sandwich with extra muconnaise.

Hmm,

I think I just saw mine

move.

Stop them! They've robbed the

blood bait!

Stop them stink-gut

bacteria launchers!

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold up a

sec. Nobody

messes with my-- Putting

on a little weight there, huh, big

guy?

Sorry.

Cold Blood Bandits!

Ozzie!

Circle round and see if you can head them

all.

You there.

We've got you cornered,

Contagion.

Rex, move it! I

can't, I'm stuck.

I guess I'll have to handle these guys on

my own.

Ah Thanks, guys. I was

out of a*mo.

Come on, Jones.

Nobody's that good.

Oh, but I... Oh, no.

Careful, careful...

Ohh

OK, that looked

like it hurt. I'm

sorry I let you down, Ozzy.

Hey, man, don't sweat it.

You can't help being freakishly

gigantic.

Come on, I know what'll cheer you

up.

Sit still while I cut you.

I told you a movie'll cheer you up.

Hey, want some polypcorn?No

thanks. Hey,

super economy

size. Get out of the way.

Who threw that?

She did. Quit it. It's

all right, Maria. Perhaps

I should move to the back. Hey,

Godsella, hurry up.

That ain't no cell. That's Godpilla.

Godpilla, I get

it. A little more off the top.

Nah, it's all good.

How about parting it to the left?

Oh, be a fizzy fanny

What?

Did you see that?Look at that head.

Something jumped off the cone.

All I saw was Drix's

behind. I think

his cherry scent may need

refreshing moving.

Sorry.

So what do you think?

Oh, why do I even try

again?

What a great movie! Oh, it's

much better than Hector Gets an

Itchy Rash, for sure. Ah,

this new haircut's just a rehash of

the old haircut. Oh, my.

Oh, good heavens.

Guys, I swear,

something jumped from the comb onto

Hector's head. Oh,

my. Hector's being

invaded by fiendish comb

gremlins.

Hey, I know I saw something.

What about you, Driggs?

Sorry, I've been too busy enjoying

this delightful lobby and its enchanting

aroma of rancid polyp corn

grease. That'll be



busted chair, Jumbo.

Ohh

Humiliation. Thy

name is

Trix.

Are you gonna lie there with a pillow

over your head all day?

Dang, I haven't seen you this depressed

since that time you didn't get invited to

the Medicine Ball. Sometimes

I think I should have

dissolved away a long,

long time ago. Would you

get over it already?

Yeah, you're big. So what?

So I had to take on two

heavily-armed viruses by

myself. So they

nearly ruptured my membrane.

So you wrecked my beauty.

beautiful, perfect car that

I love like a brother.

Where was I going with this?I

simply can't imagine.

Look, let's face it. I-I'm just too

big. Hold on.

Hector's heading into the boys' room. As

soon as he combs his hair, I'll

see it. See

what?Whatever jumped onto

his head.

Oh, no!This

is bad, Drix. And I

don't mean overdue video bad.

I mean grenade in your pants

bad.

Congratulations. You piqued my

curiosity. Check out the left

temple. Hmm

Typical scalp cells always flaking

off. Nuh-uh. That

ain't dandruff, Drix. It's

eggs. Lice eggs. And

when they hatch, Hector's

scalp is gonna be one big

blood buffet for a bunch

of six-legged monsters.

Oh, there goes

lunch.

And so, by tossing the ball into the

basket over and over... And

over and over and over...

Hand-eye coordination can be

greatly improved. Fine.

You guys handle the practice?

I'll handle the games. There's

a shipment of chocolate arriving in the

stomach that I need to taste.

I mean, inspect!

Jones. What is it

now?More jock itch?

No, it's worse. We got

lice eggs.

Ooh, eggs. Scary.

What are you afraid of?Cholesterol?

We gotta do something before they

hatch. I need your approval

to lead an expedition to the scout.

Sir, after basketball practice

today, there's a lice check in the

nurse's office. I'm quite

certain she will deal with the

situation. Lice

check?Do you have any

idea what happens if they find

lice?Heck, I'll have to stay

home from school. Maybe

for weeks. No

school for

weeks. Just think

about it. Video games,

endless TV, ready to

snack cupboard all day.

We can't just... Your audience with Mayor

Spryman is at an end,

Mr. Jones.

Fine. If you guys won't

do anything, I'll take care of this

myself. If you

want to have an out of Hector

experience, go ahead.

But without an

anticoagulation

suit, as soon as you hit the

outside air,

you'll begin to oxidize.

Yes, you'll get all

stiff and dried up and turn

into a big, little scalp.

And I'll still be better-looking than

you, Poindexter.

Yo, Driggs!

We're gonna go to the scalp and rouse

some louse. Where

did you get that

anticoagulation suit?

Hey... Ohh

This guy gave it to me.

HPD?

Jones, you took that from the police

department. Hey, I'm just

borrowing it. It's an

emergency.

Go without me. A big,

clumsy goon such as myself would

only drag you down.

Triggs, I can't go

without you.

I need you on this one.

Hector needs you. Do you

know what'll happen to him if the other

kids find out he has lice?

They will laugh at him.

They... They will?

Oh, yeah. And make

jokes behind his back. He'll be

an outcast. A misfit.

You got that right.

Spurned by society,

hated and reviled.

All this simply because he's

too big. Too

darn big! Uh,

we're not talking about Hector anymore,

are we?All right.

It's delousing

time.

You know, when you said you knew

a shortcut to the scalp,

I foolishly assumed

that it would actually be

short. Where are we?

Right below the scalp.

These are Hector's hair roots. It's

a jungle now, but in 30

years, this will all be one big

parking lot.

Quit clattering around. I got to

locate our contacts. It's

hard to find 'cause he's a little...

Secretive?I was

gonna say crazy, but your word's

nicer.

Ohh

There he is! The mole.

The northern

winds disturb the

gods. But

cats enjoy

potatoes.

Ah, Comrade Jones, you are

being just what my dossier

on you led me to expect. But

Comrade

Rixobenzomethaphedramine,

you are so

much bigger.

How are you fitting through doorways?

You have dossiers on us?Who

told you that?You did. Of

course. So you

are wishing to go to the

scalp?Yeah, we...

Get down! Oh, no!

Is there someone there?

No. Then why did...

They expect you to sh**t

when they are there, but when they are

not there, then you

catch them off the guard.

Say what?Come with me.

Come.

I will be waiting for you when you

return. If

you return.

And remember, trust

Noah. My hat

will self-destruct in two seconds.