05x05 - Safe House

[bunniefuu]

What was that?Maybe your bike's getting

ripped off again.

Hi, girls. Whoa, it's

Todd. Yeah,

like. Hi.

You candy a*s is just sitting in my spot.

Move. Uh, can we,

like, sit over here on the floor?

Whatever. Block my view and you're

dead.

Cool. Yeah.

Whoa, it's crowbar! Oh, yeah.

They're always taking a dump.

Whoa.

He said he gave his heart and soul to

some shitThat must

have been, like, at least 50 pounds of

meat. Yeah.

This music is... slow and fat. This

is the kind of music you have on a

workout tape if you're skinny and you

want to get fat. Yeah.

It's like you put this on and then just,

like, pig out. And then

every now and then you just go, I gave my

heart and soul

to you. Yeah. And then you just

sit there and get fat.

I think this is, like, a love song.

Yeah. It is a love song, so do I. Did

you see that guy?Yeah, really.

Must be his first concert.

His mom's waiting outside in the station

by him. She said,

Okay, now, what time's the concert gonna

be over?

What a what.

Kay, nobody know where I am, Kay?So if

anybody comes by looking for me, just

play dumb. Got it?Uh..

Um, this is all we got, sir. Me and

Butthead, we're gonna, like, eat it for

dinner, but, um, you know, you can

have it. You call this food?Um, uh,

what should I call it, sir?

Crap?Yeah, this is crap,

Beavis. Shut up, bunghole This is your

favorite food! It used to be butt

wipe.

Get the door, you turds! And remember,

play dumb.

Where's Todd at?Uh, we

don't know. Like, we're dumb.

Yeah, but we're like in his g*ng and

stuff. Well, you can talk to us. That's

cool. We got a message for Todd, so

listen up.

Ohh

Who was it?

They said they, like, had a message for

you, but then they just kicked our asses

Yeah, we told them we were dumb.

Yeah, they probably didn't believe

us. Can we be in your g*ng now?

Shut up and fix the antenna. Yeah,

shut up, Beavis, and fix the antenna.

Circling the globe on a quest for sports,

played only in bikinis, this is Wide

World of Bikini Sports! Yes! Yes

Bikinis rule! Damn it, sit

your a*s down. Yeah, Belus, at least

try to be cool. Dill weed.

Shut up, a*s munch. I'm here

with Tasha Lipton, four-time bikini

tetherball medalist and truly one of the

classiest individuals in the entire world

of bikini athletics. Thanks, Brett. Now

get your hand off my assUm, are we,

like, ready to be in your g*ng yet, sir?

Listen, if you were really loyal, you'd

have kicked those guys' assesTo be in my

g*ng, you got to be more than just--

dunk. Go get

that. Tell him I'm not here. Bring

some of those marshmallow things on the

way back. Or I'll stomp a mud hole in

your a*s

Whoa. Todd's even cooler than we thought.

Boys, I'm looking for a fella who goes by

the name of Todd. He's

not in here. That's not what we heard.

Uh, Sir, I'm afraid I'm going to have to

kick your assYeah, and I'm

going to kick you in the nads.

Hey, cut it out, buttholeI'll kick your

assI'm gonna kick you

in the nest.

Todd's gonna be pissed we didn't get him

those marshmallow crackers.

What's wrong with this dude's hair?Look

who's talking, Beavis. What are you

talking about?There's nothing wrong with

my hair. My hair's cool as sneaky.

Besides, that's not his hair, Beavis.

He's like, wearing some kind of Davy

Crockett hat or something. Oh wait,

Butthead, that's his hair. No, it's not,

Beavis. It's like a squirrel or

something. Oh wait. Oh yeah...

Well, check it out, Butthead. They got

Crocodile Dundee in the band. Uh.. It's

pronounced Dun-Dee, Beavis. Oh yeah...

I didn't know he played. Yeah.

He jams with midnight oil sometimes.

Not really. He sounds better with these

guys. I'm glad to see you hooked up with

a good band.

This dude's, like, getting on my nerves.

It's like, quit wiggling around and get

me some gas. Yeah, really. And check the

oil, dammit. Yeah.

And wash my windows. Butt knocker?

Don't call him that, butthead. Why not,

butt knocker?Damn it, butthead, don't

call me that. I told you that before.

Don't call him that, either. Oh, look,

he's still gonna get it. Settle down,

Brian. Yeah, that was

pretty cool. Hey, but, hey, I might get a

guitar. Yeah.

Then in the morning, you could like just

say, uh, I'm practicing.

I'm waxing.

Yeah?Well, don't drop the soap.

Uh, soap?

Okay. Follow me, girls.

So is Todd pissedYeah. And

he wants us to stop telling people we

know him because it, like, embarrasses

him or something. Oh, yeah.

He's cool. And he wants us to bring him

some food if we ever get out.

Home sweet home, punks.

Hey, it's those wussies from Todd's g*ng.

Uh, we're like, dumb.

Yeah. And now I'm gonna kick your a*s

Don't make me kick your a*s

Whoa.

That's the most naked I've ever seen a

chick on TV. Yeah. Yeah

Except for that, um, that body spray

commercial they play about 60 times a

day. Oh, yeah. Those

black boxes suck.

Whoa,

is this a Women in Prison movie?Uh..

yeah. I think so.

Alright, yeah, I'm up for this here.

Nothing like getting some nachos and

sitting back and watching a good old

Women in Prison movie. Yeah.

Just change heat?Uh.. Maybe this

isn't a Women in Prison movie. It's

like... They're singing and stuff. Yeah,

yeahWhat's the deal here?Uh..

Maybe this is like, you know, drama

chicks in prison.

Oh, wait a minute. Wait

a minute. I know what

this is. This is Cop Rock. Oh, yeah.

Cop Rock sucks. Yeah, that

show would've been better if it was like,

you know, more fights and brutality and

stuff. Yeah. So it's just like, you

know, copped but without the rock?You

know, they're just like copped. Yeah.

It could be a show about people copping a

seal.