01x05 - Such Devoted Sisters - Part One

[bunniefuu]

So, can you use a g*n? Well, I prefer fists.
Who will I be fighting? Our enemies.

Have you ever been to prison?
Why'd you ask?

The terms you're willing to take.
What did you do?

My pals saw something in
a shop window they wanted.

So, I drove into it.
It's called a smash.

Smash and grab. Yes, I know.
I do read the papers.

Says here you've recently
worked for a film actor.

Yes. As his bodyguard?

amongst other things.
But before that, in this

bookshop,

why did you leave there?
I didn't care for it. And you're happy

with this this arrangement.
Book has his life. I have mine. It

works. I I'm amazed
more people don't do it.

I knew him. Your father.
I knew him before the w*r.

You knew him,

Jack.
Ah, this is, I can't I, I can't.

Jack, where are you going?

But your previous
employer trusted you? Yes.

Despite your history?
Because of it, perhaps?

And should we trust you?

Well, I suppose you'll find out
when the next assassin comes.

Nora, I never did it.

Never did what?
Made shillings out of ice and put them

in the meter.
What's all this corrosion then?

That's rust. Yes, it is

cold, isn't it?

We could burn a few.
No, we couldn't.

Not even the Georgette Heyers? No, really, Nora.
For someone so new to the

pleasures of reading,
you're fast becoming a terrible snob.

What is it?

Feels quiet without him.

God bless the Walsingham
and all who sail in her.

Oh, God. Oh, bloody hell.
Do forgive me, my dear. I seem to be in

a state of advanced repression.
Oh, I had noticed, Victor, just stay

stay there.
I'll fetch a cloth.

Cigarette, sir.
Dunhill or Capstan?

Can we talk? Thank you.

Thank you.

Here. It's for him.
Oh, thank you.

Please enjoy.
Not enough lemon juice.

Too much ice. And I did not
like the way you shook it.

Too violent. Mhm.

Of course. Excuse me.

They think I'm too violent.
It's a violent art.

Good thing I didn't waste
any gin on them. Then

you're a quick learner.

I'm glad you've fallen on your feet.
I had no idea you'd be here. We haven't

seen you in weeks. How are you?
Look, I haven't got long. What do you want?

Oh, Jack, this is silly.

We miss you. We both hoped you'd found
a safe birth in Archangel Lane. A home.

Book and me. Well, our arrangement is
unusual, I know, but as I said to you

when we first met,
love is where it falls.

And how does my father
fit into all of that?

One of Mr. Book's little
dalliances, was he? Well,

Book needs to talk to you
about your father properly.

Look, our marriage protects us both.
Don't we have the right to be happy?

Happy? But gallivanting
off into the night in

with god knows who.
And you? Give me that.

Is that the latest?
Is it fellow with a moustache?

He's captain before the w*r.
Ah, dreamboat the officer's mess, was he?

something like that?
Listing slightly now, though, eh?

Trottie!
You don't half pick ‘em,

Mrs. Book. Well,
we better not keep him waiting.

Excuse me.

Oh, come to my room and help me dry off.
I'm wet, woman. Give me the damn cloth.

Come on.
Get your ruddy hands off me.

I won't have it, for shame.
Oh dear, sir. Oh, you've had a right

mishap. Who's this? Wet trousers are
against the dress code. You know, this

is the Walsingham. So, why don't you go
back to your room, take the wet pants

off, and have a little lay down.
I have never been so insulted. I'm

sure you have been, fella like you.
Uh, Victor or my old friend. I can't

leave you alone for 5 minutes, can I?
Bloody girl can't take a joke.

Sit down. Uh, can we have a couple of those?
What? What do you call them?

Four cinnamon sours for the two ladies
for their royal highnesses. You mean

these are on me, ladies. And may I say,
you are looking superbly Balkan tonight.

I salute the house of Spitari.
Whichever commisar lives in it now, take

a good look, Trottie. That's what happens
to you when you get dethroned by the

Reds. Oh. Oh dear.

Allow me. So embarrassing.
I do apologise.

Not at all. Not at all. Look after the
pennies and the pounds will look after

themselves, What?

Then.

I, uh, had a bit of luck on the horses.
You, uh, you know Ascot?

Very well, sir.
How was the going?

Oh, um good to firm.
After this, shall we? Uh,

normally my favorite ellipsis,
but I just think we should call it a night

now, Victor. Oh, Trottie.
You're no fun anymore.

It's amazing how different things
can look without the benefit of the

blackout.

Here's to Joe Stalin's next stroke.
Tinker-ty Tonk.

Victor.

This is a Deutschmark. Yes.

This is Chinese. Oh.

And this is a button.

It's a very nice button.
Nora, have you been taking shillings

from this tin?
No, remind me what's the price of a green

Penguin crime novel?

Ah, that's better.

Success.

Ah,

Oh, it's you.
You ready to commit affray, Miss?

No, Sergeant. She was just um browsing.
I hate to seem inquisitive, but why are

you here? Yeah, there's a chap being
k*lled at the Walsingham. Poisoned

dead in a pile of pound notes
on the floor of the River Bar.

Oh, that's just our sort of thing.
Don't get too excited. The inspector

wants a Book. G. Book, esquire.
There's some foreign royalty involved,

it seems. He says, "Uh, do you have
anything on the Balkan Rules of Revenge?"

Specifically, the cannon of Spitari."
How too, too ridiculously obscure. Do you

have it? Almost certainly.
And uh 504, he says.


It's all right for

some, I suppose. Mrs. Book’s already checked in.
What? Oh, uh, she's one of

the suspects.

Trouble in paradise,
is there, sir?

h* h*. What a beauty. Yes.
Might be one of those clues. We

like those. Do you mind?

Yes.

Do people really say what's your
poison when when they're at the bar?

No idea. I don't get out much.
What do you mean? Look at Walsingham.

So is he? Oh yeah.
Let's uh let's get him

somewhere more private. Yep.

Not the main entrance, please.
Inspector,

I'm sorry. We can't be more discreet.
May I suggest the service corridor?

Ah, yes. Yes. Thank you, Mr. Kind.
Nothing to stop you reopening the bar

tomorrow, I think.

Thank you.

Good evening, sir. Evening.

You have a reservation?
Uh, no. My wife does.

Your wife? Mrs. Book.
Have you seen her? I'm afraid

she may be distressed.
Oh, Book.

Oh. 504. Freddy, Ah, no,
I'll keep this one. Thank you.

What's happened, darling?
What's this about a corpse? Why have they been

scouring my stacks for books on Balkan blood feuds.
I'm not proud of myself.

There was champagne. A day at the races.
Riddle Me in the 2:30.

c*ck. More c*ck. And then… Trottie.
We live our own lives. That was

always the deal. Self flagellation is never helpful.
Not nearly as much fun as

someone doing it to you.
Who was he? Victor Orr

‘Orr’. With two ‘R’s.
Naval captain married.

I’d met him before in an air raid 41.
He uh made a pass at me in in

where? Please don't
make me say the ‘F’ word…

‘Foyle’s’. Yes.

Oh,
I just fancied a good time.

Well, there's nothing wrong with that.
He turned out to be the most awful bore.

Where is he now?
In the morgue. Oh,

one last night on the tiles.
And there's something else.

Look, thank God you're here.
You ready? For what?

To interview royalty.
It's a little irregular, isn't it?

I don't care. They terrify me.
I'm not going in there alone.

Haven't you taken their fingerprints?
I've got Morris to do that. I may be a

coward, but I'm not a fool.
I have our primary text, the Kanun

des Scutari. Oh, yeah. Looks expensive.
Will it pay for our suite, Inspector?

Oh, the late captain had taken care of that, Mrs.
But you're in the room next

to the princesses.
Oh, what are they like?

Oh, they're glamorous in a sort of
disappointed and stateless kind of way.

Perhaps it's time I kept a closer eye on them.
And an ear, too. I shall use one of

those little glasses
they keep by the sink.

So, will this help us find who's done it?
It's a book of customary laws for

remote mountain communities without
a magistrate or justice. The village

elders consult the text and then tell
you how much Raki to provide for your

daughter's wedding, what to do if your
bees escape and build a nest on your

labor's land, that sort of thing.
And who you're allowed to k*ll if

somebody kills your cousin.
Ah.

Well, what language did
you think it was going

to be in? Well,
we have three native speakers on

the premises,
but but they're all suspect.

Who's the third?
Oh, he's a rather good-looking c*ck

waiter. Well, don't fret too much.
The dutiful.

Teutonic scholar did publish a
translation of it in the German.

Oh, you you certainly speak the
German. in his sleep sometimes.

So, where is this translation?
Norah is looking for it now. Must be

somewhere in the law section or social
science or etiquette or propping open a

door. You said do something else. Yes.
These princesses have been given

gainful employment to one of
the capital’s dispossessed.

Oh yes, I know.

And there he is.

I'll turn down the bed springs.
Sergeant Morris will be along soon to take a

statement. Yes, of course.

I I'd be grateful, Mrs.
Book, if you didn't leave the hotel.

It's perfectly all right, Inspector.
You have to do your duty.

Here to see their
royal highnesses.

Enter. Oh dog, where is it?
Green straight

grained Morocco bound folio with a lot
of academic monographs bound inside.

Slightly foxed according
to the catalogue.

You're no help.

Der Kanun des Scutari.

What would I do without you?

Oh, please.

Time for a little chat, Mrs.
Book.

Poof. I I beg your pardon.

I apologise for it.
That we have sunk so low. Remember the

great banqueting table through here?
chairs made with birch as silvery as the

snow on the mountain tops
upholstered with dammasks or so.

Oh, we've been in more awkward
situations than this, haven't we,

inspector? That we have, Book.
So, which is the policeman? You or this

book? He's taking notes for me.
Helping with

the, uh, Pitman's short hand. So useful.
Tall and redheaded like the poppies of

our homeland.
I realise that this will be very

difficult for you your royal highnesses.
Uh but if there's any

detail you can recall, however small,
it may help us discover who k*lled Captain Orr.

That is easy. I k*lled him.
You, you did what?

It is true. I switched the glasses.
He drank the poison meant for one of us. We

have a routine, my sister and I,
to cause a distraction. I salute the house

of Scutari. Whichever
commissar lives in it now. Take

a good look, Trottie. That's what happens
to you if you get dethroned by the Reds.

Oh no. Oh dear.

So embarrassing. I do apologise.
Not at all. Not at all. Look after the

pennies and the pounds will
look after themselves, What?

It is a habit, a necessary precaution.
Like this.

This was the third attempt on our life
since we left New York. There was a

Steward on the Bearing.
Can I turn over your room? Madame.

So transparent.
And that Salvation Army woman outside

the opera shaking her tin box. Huh?
She denied everything. Of course.

Who do you think is trying to k*ll you?
The communists, of course.

Opera. But they already
have your palaces, your

estates, our summer house
on the Adriatic. There

is a lake there. When the rising sun touches
it, it is like the blush.

In the spring, our country was
proclaimed a people's republic. They

want what's the expression?
A big finish. Huh?

Hence the bodyguard.
And how are you finding him?

As he failed to prevent an attempt on our
lives, I would say he has not

covered himself in glory.
Don't the communists also have your

other sister? We do not speak of her.
Seliyeh? Yes. The youngest. She renounced

her title. We do not speak of her.
Red scum. She

betrayed her birthright,
her country, her family.

Take it. Thank you.

Of course, if this does turn out to be the
case, then your switching of the

drinks will not be without consequence.
We are used to being pilloried. We will

take whatever
comes to us right

Now then in your statement you
said something about this m*rder being

written about in the Kanun of Scutari.
What does that mean?

It means that a k*lling like this
follows certain customary principles.

It means the first thing you must
do is arrest that c*ck waiter.

Ismail Gazili Guili Guili.

Guili Guili? Why?

He's from the mountains.
These people know the rules of revenge. They are

obsessed with them. You must arrest him.
And you must bring in any others on the

staff other

moun, mountain men. Yes.

Yes.

Well, thank you so much.
It's been this has been most helpful.

So, you will do as we say.
No, I will not.

Why? Because,
princess, I am not your

subject. And in this country,
a man is innocent until proven guilty, whatever

altitude he was born at.

Sometimes, inspector,
you make me proud to be from the gutter.

Never really thought of
myself as a Republican.

Well, it's the w*r, Book. Changed us all.
I never really thought of myself as a

Jew. You ever come
here during the Blitz?

They had to let you in if there was a raid
on, even without a tie. We used to

come down to the lower bar.
It was known as the ‘Fruit Cellar’.

That was quite
the mixed grill.

You did nothing. You're supposed to
be my boyfriend and you did nothing.

Eadie, What did you expect me to do?
Nothing.

Was he the one from this morning? Yeah.
Came at me in a silk dressing gown

with everything pointing north.
His name is Captain Victor Orr.

Not anymore.
They already gave me a warning.

What? Yeah.
Apparently shouting at lecherous

customers isn't the Walsingham way.
I'll speak to Mr. Kind.

It was Mr. Kind who gave me the warning.
One more black mark on my arse.

I Hate this place. You know,

I was doing okay here.
At least I thought I was.

What's the bloody point?
Eadie, I'm sorry.

You know, my dad was right about you,
Ismail, and I should have listened to

him. Leave me alone. What?

Watch this.

Careful, officer. My friend borrows
his jazz mags from the maître d’.

You can't shop me, sir. I've been to the
Windmill theatre and seen those gents

with the newspapers on their laps…
And brought a few into the station.

Been jazzing with this one, sir?
Oh, no. That lot put me right off.

Oh, you hate your royal family, do you?
They're not my royal family. They've

been nobody’s royal family since 1940.
Ever since they left us with that chap.

Hey, Marco. What was his name?
Mussolini, mate?

I knew you'd know, mate. Right.
Oh, sir. Confiscating this as

evidence.
You enjoy this, don't you?

It's just work, sir.
Keep your temper, eh?

Suppose you usually take all that
aggression out on the ice cubes.

Book for Mr. Book. Who?

It's the Kanun Scutari .
It's Albanian.

Mrs. Book's out of the picture.
You can't be certain of that, sir.

I've read a statement and I'm
satisfied it's nothing to do with her.

But sir, I'm satisfied.
Morris.

clear?

So you think it was one of us?
I don't think anything yet.

Senor Barbarini. Okay.
Well, I've narrowed it down to

two. A royal member of the House of Scutari.
Nafije or Ruhije?

Right. Oh, Method. Poison.
Something slipped into the

c*ck glass after he
tried it on with Eadie Rattle.

That's the chambermaid. Yes.
So, where was she when Captain Orr coughed his

last? Gone already.

Motive? You think of any reason why
anyone would want to k*ll Captain Victor.

Orr? Are you kidding?
That captain was always

here with different women,
usually in the same room. 504.

Really? City view. Noiseless bed springs.

Duchess rate for favorite patrons.
And that captain has been coming here for

years. Usually once a
week without a squeak.

You're very well informed.
No secrets at the Walsingham, sir. We see

all the dirt in there because
we have to clean it.

Some might say, Mr. Guz, Guzili
that it's the duty of a grand hotel to

make sure that the private life
of a guest remains private.

And some might say, inspector,
that in a grand hotel, people are usually at it

like cod in a bucket.
So, it's a crime of passion, then.

No, I reckon the
captain was something in

intelligence during the w*r.

How do you know that? They're a type.
Friendly, but tell you

nothing. With a drink. They'll always
have what the other person's having.

So, uh, why would the princesses
want to k*ll a British spy?

Because British intelligence handed
over Scutari to the communist partisans

and the captain
recognised the princesses.

Who are they?
Should I know them? Balkans.

Same to you. Nafije

and Ruhije,
princesses of the royal house of.

Scutari,
deposed by the communists and now

drifting around the world like flotsam.
Very glamorous flotsam. Wasn't there a

scandal? They did a flit and the bullion
from the National Bank somehow found its

way into their hat boxes.
Something of the sort.

And they're drifting
our way – or your way to

be precise. Oh, I see.
In the market for a set of

dictionaries, are they?
They're staying at the Walsingham just

down the road from you.
And, uh, there have been letters,

threats, vicious ones.
You should speak to the Post Office then.

We'd be ever so grateful if
you just kept an eye on them.

I told you

I'm just a book seller. And I

I remind you that we
helped find young Jack.

It wasn't easy, you know.

Oh, it's you. It's me.

Ta for, you know.
Ah, don't mention it.

So, does that happen a lot then?
Does it?

Comes with a job, doesn't it?
Can I do you now, sir?

Wouldn't have k*lled him for it, though.
Somebody did.

Yeah. So,

which side are you on? Sorry.

Which side are you on? Whoa.
What are the options? Well,

there's the management in this hotel who
treat their staff like muck and give a

girl a mouthful just for
standing up for herself.

Right.
Then there's the workers.

Okay. Well, the workers then.
Nice to hear your expression of

solidarity, brother. But it's deeds,
not words that count, don't you think?

Right. So, why don't you go down there
to that taxi stand, get me a nice cup of

Bovril? I can't.

Maybe later. I just got to get back
to their royal bloody highnesses?

Afraid. So,
how does it feel working for those

parasites?
Is that what they are?

Well, what would you call them?
Sad,

I suppose.
Yeah, a bit sad. Well,

speaking for myself, I'd line them
up and sh**t the buggers.

I can say a proper hello to you
now, Edmund Kind.

Good evening.
More than Kind, I used to say.

Oh, well, that's too kind.
They closed it, you know, the lower bar.

The Fruit Cellar? Oh, what a shame.
Yes, for redecoration though when the work

will actually start. I don't know.
Seems they prefer it mothballled. The

management. You mean it's
all still there? The mural

and everything.
Well, we could take a look if you'd

like. Uh,
I should really be getting back

upstairs. Of course.

I suppose a, a little
peep wouldn't hurt.

Now the question is how the lights work?
Don't remember

there being any.
You never turned them on.

Blackout, I suppose. I know.
It was just terribly

unflattering. Oh, yes.
You're right. Let's turn them

off. Just a soupçon.

If these walls could talk.

Kim Strang is dead.
Did you hear? Kim Strang?

He used to keep his Max
Factor in a gas mask box.

Well, he'd been in Egypt, hadn't he?
Had to keep that tan up.

What happened to him? He walked into
the sea at Shoreham. I'm sorry to say.

Somebody had his letters.
Dreadful. Really

dreadful.
And you're very married. I see.

Very, very married. Congratulations.

Thank you.
And thanks for your help with the, um,

other matter. Not at all.
What does Jack know?

That my wife and I have an arrangement
that I knew his late father.

Nothing more? He found that difficult enough to take.
Ran out on us that very

night. Floated here

where he is gainfully employed thanks to
you, and able to keep an eye on the other

bodies floating around.
The regal Scutari ones.

Why do you need to keep an eye on those?
It's possible they were the intended

victims, not the captain.

It's a working hypothesis.
Are you with the police now, Gabriel?

You always were a dark horse.
It makes up a substantial part of my

charm. Christ, isn't that dangerous?
I mean, one false step…

I am all too well aware of that, Edmund.
Although, I do have a special letter

from Churchill.
Still, he probably shouldn't be found in

a dimly lit basement bar with with
a terribly handsome old friend. Oh,

perhaps not.

Trouble with the grid?
The Walsingham isn't connected to

the grid. It has its own oil-powered
generators, dipping it in by the barrel.

Everything depends on it, even the plumbing.
And what's a grand hotel

without power and hot running water?
Well, I suppose it's just a big building

full of people who are rather cold
and rather hungry and very, very rich.

I should get back.

Me, too.

No big surprises on the poison front, Inspector.
The deadly glass contained

boring old hydrochloric acid.
Oh, we can't all be virtuosos.

‘Virtuosi’ The the thumbrint.
Enough for an arrest?

Enough for a hanging. Maybe.

Okay. Thank you. Bye.
Where's Eadie Rattle?

Oh, um I'll check. Very good.

Did the blessed sergeant get
everything he required from you, dear?

Well, I took him through it in exhausting detail.
Where did you get to?

I've been talking to the staff.
Oh, yes. Very nice of you.

The ones who served
you c*ck tonight.

Well, it was really only
the younger one. Guzili,

if you say so.
Apparently, he poured a whole round down the sink, ice and

fruit and all.
Could he have tampered with the second

round? Yes.
Nobody was looking because of the

brouhaha. Brouhaha?

Yes. One of the princesses dropped her reticule.
There was loose change all

over the floor.
Yes, I've heard about that. And after

the brouhaha?, well,
I dragged Victor back to the bar.

He made a toast. And then there was the furore.
A brouhaha and then a furore. It

was very confusing.
Oh, and uh there was a woman.

A woman? I've just
remembered she handed me a

cloth like St.
Veronica on the road to Calvary

to mop up Victor Orr's trousers.
There was something about the look she gave me.

Poor Victor.
People were recoiling in pure horror.

It was burning his neck out,
but you could hear it crackle.

I'm sorry you had
a beastly time.

I just wanted to get stinko and wake
up somewhere with clean sheets and three

egg omelettes. I wanted something.
So, I wanted him.

I do love you, Mrs.
Book. Dead h*.

Book. Yes.

We never really talk. Talk?

about the arrangement.
What to talk about?

Well, to see that all is
well, that we're both okay.

All is well.
Look, you left the light on for me.

I could be making
love in this

in the dark.
Has anyone told Victor Orr's wife?

It's not like she was
expecting him to come home.

Do you know who she is?
I don't really know who he was.

Still, suppose he did
get us a night here.

Isn't it marvellous?
No clouds tonight.

Nowhere for the stars to hide.
We never really had a proper honeymoon,

did we? Bit of a diary clash.
The Luftwaffe had

their heart set on Eastbourne, too.
Beach was very pebbly anyway.

And covered in barbed wire.
Does it worry you though? Disappoint

you? What?

The absence of
landmarks, declarations,

grand gestures. Oh, no, Book.

In fact, I'm going to make one now.
Who is?

Let's order a bloody
huge bottle of champagne.

Got our papers stamped and signed, tickets, too.
Can't you do anything

discreetly, my love?

We have 5 minutes till it leaves, platform 6.
We're going to be in Paris

for breakfast. There are no Nazis in
Paris, but there are croissants, so it's all

going to be fine.

I can't come with you, Book, for the
same reason that you must leave.

Oh, and I must return
this to you, my

my dear fellow.

I love a good book,
a beautiful book.

And how easy it is to to picture
myself on some winter evening

in the country lying with
this particular book.

It moves me so much.

But I'm afraid I cannot keep it.
I know its frailties.

And some books got
burned, you know,

and I should not like to be
responsible for the loss of this one

because it is so dear to
me that I know it by heart.

Henceforth, wherever
thou mayst roam,

my blessing like
a line of light…

…Is on the waters day and night

and like a beacon
guards the home.

Mr. Kind, I'm doing the rounds
explaining about the situation.

Be so good as to move around a little less silently.
It arouses suspicion.

Forgive me, your royal highness.
It's my training. You see,

it's mine, too.
An engineer is investigating. I do

apologise for any inconvenience.
We are accustomed to hardship.

What are you carrying? Show me.
This is the Kanun. The Kanun of Scutari.

Why do you have this?
I'm taking it to Mr. Book in the next

room. He's helping the police.
This is most interesting.

Continue. Well,
he's a sort of expert witness, and

he's staying here with his
wife, who I believe…

I meant continue on your way.
Good night.

Oh, I thought you were a
bottle of... how dispiriting.

A book for Mr. Book.
What is it, dear?

It was that book you wanted.
Oh, very good.

The lights were on the blink up here.
An engineer is investigating. I do

apologise for any inconvenience.
Is there anything more I can do for you?

Well, tracking down our
champagne would be nice.

Of course,

extraordinary man.
Smells nice, though. Gardinia

Capitol. Just what we need.
They're taking their time with that

champagne, aren't they?
I think they're having trouble below

with the generators.
You don't need champagne, do you, Book?

Just anything with footnotes.
Then the bibliography,

maybe an erratum slip.

Used to love this place.
You know, in the w*r, the rooms were cheap. 35

shillings a night.
Well, the ones nearest the V2s anyway. Always plenty of

life down in the bar.
Bit too much sometimes.

Now the Walsingham is
listing like an old ship.

Well, I'd like to smash
a bottle against it.

Let me tell the story of an old lady
fair, standing sentinel across the years

in the city's Bonny Square.
Let me tell the story of the journey

down to hell, from the dear
dilapidated Walsingham Hotel.

Some came to stay, to rest, to play.
Some came to labor every day. Some came

to sound the passing bell for
the dear old Walsingham Hotel.

But who k*lled Captain Victor Orr?
Princess, waiter, maid, or more? Who

came to sound the final knell
for the dear old Walsingham.

Hotel?

Well, then

that's that.

What was that? Eadie!
Eadie, are you okay?

One more step and I’ll...