02x11 - The Shoplifter

[bunniefuu]

what honeydew

Vicky would you pour me a cup of coffee

please pour you a cup of coffee

very clever Viki that's cute what's so

fascinating in the morning paper on it

it's this article on children and

department store shoplifting the word

shoplifting is not in my memory bank

well shopping list D means taking

something without paying for it

it's like cash and carry without the

cash what's happening to kids nowadays

it says here that children pocket over

two billion dollars a year in stolen

merchandise two billion their pockets

must go all the way down to their toes I

blame the parents they should lock them

up and throw away the key hmm kids steal

at school too if you're not careful

they'll steal the lint out of your belly

button thanks morning remember who I am

oh sure you're that lady who helped us

about Nicky please come in I guess you

remembered my face thank you it's that

lady who helped us adopt Vicky

mrs. furball No oh I hope you didn't

find out about the fake documents and

the adoption what else could we do

without them finding out she's a robot

Jamie keep Vicky in here right dad hi

there hi

- what do we owe this unexpected

surprise mrs. Vernon well not that you

aren't always well of course is there a

problem with Vicki the Department of

Family Services just likes to check up

periodically on the progress of adopted

children see if everybody's happy

well I'm happy Joan are you happy I'm

very happy how about thinking oh she

couldn't be happier then I'm happy too

well I guess we're up there eyeballs and

happy oh mrs. Watson I assume that

you've kept up your teaching credentials

and that you're still tutoring Vicki

here at home oh yes that well I'm afraid

though that happy Vicki is still much

too shy a child to go to public school

right Ted oh right but she is smart as a

whip I can honestly say she's got a

brain like a computer

well dropping by also gives me the

opportunity to bring this for the dear

birthday girl that was very nice but I

it's not my birthday oh it's not for you

it's for Vicki Vicki

her birthday I'm the adoption papers you

stated that today is Vicki's birthday

all right right yes

Vicki's birthday do tell me you've

forgotten your own daughter's birthday

no never

it just looks that way because that what

you tell it it no dear you're doing just

fine

oh well because I because we are just

pretending to ignore it

yes actually we're planning a surprise

party today and we just didn't want her

to get suspicious about it matter of

fact I just found out myself well please

give her this and I'll be oh say I just

had a thought why don't I come back for

the party and then I can give her the

present myself come back for the party

well that's not necessary mrs. fern well

I mean we don't want to inconvenience

you never too busy for all my children

especially those with birthday parties

then I guess we'd love to have you what

time is the party what time would you

like it to be I mean what time did we

decide on dear oh I hope it isn't 4

o'clock because I do have another

appointment at 4 o'clock it's at 4

o'clock I changed a point

it's wonderfully been four o'clock it is

surprised parties are such fun goodbye

such a happy home now we supposed to put

together a surprise party it's such

short notice I don't know

surprise me Halley's Comet oh this is

what we call it a permanent store a

department store this will be a good

learning experience for you you know

what we're gonna do here yes we're going

to shoplift no we're just gonna shop we

got to buy you a present so the party

will look real the mrs. fern walls first

we'll do a little browsing is there

something you want young lady I'm just

doing a little browsing Wow

look at all these gold watches I

wouldn't know which one to pick I'd like

to take the whole display case take the

whole display case

I can't take my eyes off you for a

minute

Wow look at that one with all the

diamonds

I'll bet mom would sure like to have

that for her birthday mom would sure

like to have that for her birthday

[Laughter]

[Applause]

[Music]

[Music]

hi Harriet I just had passed me on your

kitchen window this morning and it is

happening I know you just happen to

overhear us talking about giving Vikki a

surprise birthday party no I just have

notice your germanium seeds watering

totally not the party what time's my

visa well Sheree I didn't get fired

enamel you know okay it's at four

o'clock you not to bring a gift if you

don't want it good

cuz I don't wanna

[Laughter]

by Harriet i'm saucin guess what I ended

up finding you for your birthday Vicki

I'm not programmed to guess

well ask me did you get me something I

can use did you get me something I can

use know something I can use

birthdays I got mom a birthday present

what the birthday present you wanted to

get her oh you shoplifted children are

responsible for shoplifting over two

billion dollars a year if dad finds out

he's gonna k*ll me and take you apart

come on maybe we can put it back before

they notice it's gone hi

[Music]

okay Vicky just not casual like I do

well I see your back

browsing again no we're just acting

casual we're just trying to make up our

minds about a present okay Vicky you put

the watch back in the case and I'll go

do something to attract their

everybody's attention got it bought it

[Laughter]

[Music]

right there you little thief are you

feeling better now no lady you're

looking at a dead man

[Music]

honey the place looks terrific Thanks

I had a terrible time trying to buy

Vicki a birthday present

I mean what do you get for an 11 year

old robot who has nothing I'll like

she's our own real 11-year old daughter

yeah I know what you mean any rate I got

her this cute little dress look who's

back for the party yeah see is that the

punchbowl that your mother borrowed for

me six months ago

yes I'm returning it that's my present

you remember our neighbours daughter

Harriet hi mrs. Furr nods hi there cutie

looks like you have more freckles and

less teeth

excuse me hello Jamie

where are you yes yes

she did what

just just stay stay stay calm I'll be

right there

yeah it was Jamie and Vicky where well

he's just they're just having a little

money trouble buying Vicky's birthday

present no problem honey I'll go down

and work it out hmm honey could I see

you in the kitchen for a moment please

sure well if you'll just excuse us you

know kids no I did

so you're Vicky's little playmate yes I

like you a lot she's the only throw I

know don't I like that and then myself

weird weird

tell me more what I must have

accidentally programmed Vicki to

shoplift this morning at breakfast oh

great okay I'll try to get rid of mrs.

Furr world

we sure wouldn't want to get wind of it

yeah good thinking oh honey we're not

back in an hour put a file in to

Vickie's birthday cake and what other

kinds of weird things does Vickie do

Harriet well sometimes she stands in the

clothes cabinet and talk like a robot

robot Vicki just has a very vivid

imagination mrs. Byrne Wald she's a very

special child

I'll stay - I even saw her twister how

the way around like a corkscrew what as

you can see Harriet has a pretty vivid

imagination ourselves my head all the

way round but I can turn my feet

backwards

[Music]

honest mr. she wasn't stealing the watch

she was putting it back I've got a good

question how could you put it back that

she didn't steal it in the first place

my dad I hope he's got a good answer

dad meet the store detective hello look

Jamie told me about it on the phone and

I'm really very sorry but I assure you

that Vicky has never stolen anything

before and I've heard that before

all I know is that kids keep right on

stealing if you're not careful I'll

steal the lint out of your belly button

my kids got a great sense of humor yes

it was my fault dad we were looking at

the watches and I said to Vickie I'd

sure like to get that watch for mom's

birthday so naturally she went right

ahead and stole it naturally look look

maybe she took it but then she put it

back sir my kids know that stealing is

wrong

and if they want something they have to

work and pay for it does it make it

right sausage and Joe public ends up

paying for it G me not now flip sir I'm

aware that it's a terrible problem and

if it'll help out anything I will buy

the watch it cost $500 on the

installment plan now I'll give you a

down payment I have got my wallet right

here

[Laughter]

can you explain how that watch got in

your pocket yes I have no idea your

daughter put it there didn't you I put

it there I'm beginning to get the

picture Lawson you got these kids

working for you you're a regular

modern-day Fagin Fagin I blame it on the

parents they should lock them up and

throw away the key mrs. firm wallet it

really looks like they might not be home

for quite some time yet why don't I just

postpone the surprise party until

another time like next year nonsense now

we wouldn't want the dear child to be

disappointed would we good let's hide I

got dibs I'm back in coach swell another

party hat mrs. Lawson yes I've got a

warrant to search your premises for

stolen property

what stolen property did what is going

on honey it's all a big mistake I tried

to tell him that Vicki is not a

shoplifter and I taught her everything

she knows he's a modern-day Fagin sir

sir let me introduce myself my name is

olivia fern rolled and I am with the

Department of Family Services and I

demand an explanation

well I'm Stanley Gordon security officer

at the department store and I just

caught Vicky here stealing a an

expensive diamond wristwatch Oh I can't

believe that I always thought arise are

too close together

Harrod I think you'd better go home now

boy this is really exciting to me my mom

Sonia will know about it within the hour

mr. Gordon I can assure you there's no

need to search our house you won't find

anything I've heard that one before

Jimmy why didn't you take figs in your

room

sure mom it's mom babyface Lawson okay

okay

if Vicki's never done this before why

did she start now well it's very simple

she overheard us discussing an article

about children and shoplifting that's

the truth and she must have innocently

decided to give it a try mr. Gordon may

I say something why of course you know

in my line of work I see a lot of these

cases now I have known this child for a

year now and it seems to me Vicki does

not need punishment no no in most cases

these are isolated events that happen

just once if I'm any judge of character

she won't do it again

she's a wonderful child one

isn't she wonderful no he says exactly

as she's told you see why don't I walk

you to the car and we can discuss this

further or perhaps we could discuss it

one evening over

[Music]

thank heavens from mrs. Byrne Walt she

certainly knows her way around a man

Jamie Vicki you can come back in now

honey I am exhausted what a day Vicki's

birthday party well everything's okay

we're off the hook great I'm way too

small for the big house no stripes

couldn't make you look a lot taller

Vicki you're about to celebrate your

very first birthday yeah happy birthday

happy birthday mom

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

you

[Music]