02x06 - Crazy Like a Fox

[bunniefuu]

hey look

Vicky hey kids this scet is my name and

uh bargain are my game what's your

pleasure what have you got well how

about a TV stereo t-shirts All Quality

merchandise guaranteed for life or 30

days whichever comes

first how come you sell stuff out of

your car well I uh like to keep the

merchandise

moving here we go hey kids uh how about

a radio sounds like a whole Symphony

Orchestra I'd love to play it for you

but I got no place to plug it in here

take a look at

[Music]

[Music]

it it must be the batteries it don't

work on

batteries she does

huh see you hey hey hey wait a minute

kids how about a mini TV battery power

state-of-the-art hottest item I got I'd

love it but I couldn't afford it afford

it oh this face H listen kid I like your

face tell you what I'm going to do you

can have this TV set for uh how much did

you say you got on you I didn't but I've

got what's left of my mom's grocery

money

$10 what a coincidence that's exactly

the price of the set $10 and 18 And1

18 that's all it costs a lot more in the

stores well right you are but you see

due to my low overhead I eliminate the

middleman why sometimes I even eliminate

the

manufacturer uh but listen you kids

better make up your mind quickly I only

got one

left

well can I always pay mom back with my

my

allowance okay Eddie I'll take it smart

move kid you are no

Meathead hi we're back

okay oh hi kids hi Mom Dad guess what I

bought from discount Eddie discount

Eddie a mini TV and it only costs $10

18 guaranteed for life or 30 days

whichever comes first

I'll bet you know a set like this costs

at least $80 or $90 how could you get

one for

$108 he liked Jamie's

face yeah I used what was left of the

grocery money mom but I'll pay you back

isn't it terrific I'll let you know when

I get a picture

[Laughter]

just as I thought nothing well you

always say there's nothing on

TV what happened Dad well you got ripped

off Jamie okay where is this guy's

store sort of on the corner of third NM

sort of he sells stuff out of the trunk

of his car he likes to keep the

merchandise

moving okay I'm going to have a talk

with this guy uh count Eddie I'll be

back later third in the elm

right sorry about the money mom well

maybe it's worth it to learn that you

don't get something for Nothing in life

huh come on Vick you can help me get

lunch started oh uh would you open up

this this can of tomato

juice Vicki stop

what's the

matter it says on the can to shake well

before

[Music]

opening pogo sticks are a lot of fun

Vicki here you

try now hang on real

tight great now try it by yourself

see how high you can

go

higher for

the

tree

hi what are you looking at uh nothing

Harriet

Ricky are you

okay yes but I sure scared the heck out

of a wood

picker what are you guys talking

about nothing Harriet Vicky take that

stuff off well I'm glad our folks are

going to the banquet together tonight so

I can stay your place what do we do well

I'm going to watch Dracula maybe you

shouldn't come because it's too scary I

won't your blood blood blood

blood that doesn't scare me if you were

a vampire my neck would always be your

disposal that scares

me hi kidos hi Mom having

fun oh how

JY hi hi oh I'm so looking forward to to

our banquet tonight I want to look

especially beautiful so do I oh you

think you can do that much in 3

hours well I'll give it my best shot

well I'm sure you can do something after

all they can paint a whole car in only

one

day thanks for the

encouragement what are friends for I am

going to wear my Slinky red dress

tonight it doesn't reveal too much but

it lets you know there's a lot more

where that came

from oh I remember it well the one with

the plunging turtleneck yeah I was

wondering could I borrow those gold

earrings the ones you're always saying

are

real they are real oh see you're doing

it again

[Music]

find anything you like

pal are you discount Eddie hey In the

Flesh what do you need friend a

policeman if you get me any trouble yeah

what what hey what's the problem you

sold my kid this piece of junk it

doesn't work I want his money back

that's $108 come on come on hey relax

you got a discount that he stands behind

all his junk use your money friend yeah

no don't try

to just like that you're going to give

me my money back without an argument

yeah not only that friend but to make up

for your boy's mental anguish he can

keep the TV set now now uh does uh Kmart

do that oh you that's it's really decent

of you I'm sorry I came on so strong a

that's all right forget it take the

money take the boy to a movie have

yourself a nice evening well you too uh

thanks again

bye what's your rush I mean as long as

you're here friend uh what do you need a

tape recorder movie camera x-rated

t-shirts no no uh no listen I I got to

run now my wife's waiting for me I we're

going to a big banquet tonight the

banquet why did you say so I got just

the thing for her now now now turn

around turn around turn around and close

your eyes and no

peeking will you see

this now how about something like this

for the little

lady oh yeah genuine Fox F oo very very

nice now would she not look fantastic in

this tonight oh Janie would go crazy

over a sto like this well you could say

that again Janie would go crazy over a

sto yeah right now listen friend picture

it I mean you walk into the banquet hall

all eyes are on you you stop and you

turn you stand there proudly as

everybody admires your beautiful wife

[Laughter]

why are we even discussing this I can

never afford this thing this thing must

cost $11,000 yeah right but not a

discount Edy how does 200 bucks sound

200 all right all right you drive a hard

bargain friend you talked me into it how

about uh

10050 oh come on Eddie I mean at that

price this thing has to be hot as a

tamale well you said it hot's the word

look no beating around the bush hot is

uh hot well listen I could never buy my

wife a stolen fur oh really well let me

tell you about stolen Furs friend I'll

bet you didn't know that some of the

best downtown stores sell hot

Furs come on I like your face I'm going

to make an even sweeter deal

$149.50 including sales tax and from you

I will take a

check well uh oh think of the look on

the little lady's face when she sees it

genuine genuine fox fur

all right you got a

[Music]

deal hi

hi a I see that crook wouldn't give you

our money back for the TV not surprised

honey we had discount Eddie figured all

wrong not only did he give me the $10

back but he wants Jamie to keep the TV

set huh which does not work the man's

the saint what's in the Box come on over

here sit down and close your eyes come

on well what for come on sit sit sit sit

sit close your eyes no no no no no no no

no okay eyes closed closed okay this

better not be a

trick feel that t I'll k*ll you if it's

a dead

cat okay open your eyes

oh honey a fox fur yeah like I always

said one gorgeous Fox deserves another

huh you can wear it to the banquet

tonight oh honey oh I don't know what to

say yeah genuine fox fur huh how's it

feel

expensive can we afford it oh easily at

discount Eddies discount

Eddies yeah yeah1 14950 including tax I

mean does Kmart do that

H what are you doing looking for the

flea

caller that price has got to be a dead

cat no it's the real thing well then

it's got to be hot hot's the word no

beating around the bush hot is hot let

me tell you about hot Furs

friend I mean

Joan honey I appreciate you buying it

for me but I couldn't wear a stolen fur

you understand don't you please take it

back but you sure I'm sure but thanks I

love you for the

thought hi hi where you been Jamie was

teaching me how to jump over the garage

on the evil conal of the Pugo

stick dad did you see discount Eddie yes

I did Jamie and not only did he give me

your $10 back butth he wants you to keep

the television set hey maybe I could

find someone to sell it to that way I'd

be ahead on the deal forget it it's

dishonest to sell something that you

know doesn't work get the message

kiddo yeah but what am I supposed to do

with a TV set that doesn't work you can

watch TV shows that don't

work welcome to

Transylvania come closer my

dear

Closer

[Music]

Closer I thought you said these movies

don't scare you they don't I just love

putting my arms around

you forget it

oh what a cute little TV so small and

Compact and adorable it reminds me of

you

Jamie thanks a lot I wish I had one like

this well you don't so pipe down

and Harriet would you mind going into

the kitchen and getting us more popcorn

oh I'd love to I heard on Dynasty that

men are more romantic on a full stomach

bigy I think I found a buyer for my mini

TV forget it it's dishonest to sell

something that you know doesn't work get

the message

kiddo yeah that message was for me not

for you you're going to sell this TV to

Harriet and just like this count Eddie

sold it to me got it got

it there's no salt on the popcorn salt

dries up your lips and ruins your

[Music]

hacker in that case we're going to need

some sodas I'll go get

them discount Bigg's the name and

Bargains are my

game huh how about this mini TV battery

powered state-ofthe-art hotest side of

my gut I'd love it Vicki but I can never

afford it listen kids I like your

face tell you what I'm going to do you

can have the set for H how much did you

say you've got on you all I've got is

the $3 i f under my pillow from the

Tooth Fairy what a coincidence exactly

the price the set that's great you've

got a deal I'll go home and get my money

be right

back smart move kid you're a real meat

head

[Music]

H I thought you were going to return the

fur to Discount Eddie this morning the

little rat wasn't there he must have

crawled back into his hole and I called

the bank and they already cashed the

check terrific that means we're at

$150 shame shame shame shame on you

what's the matter Bonnie well your

deceitful child took advantage of my

innocent little lamb

speak up

dummy I got is television set for $3 and

it doesn't work sorry about that I'll

see that Jamie returns your money it

wasn't Jamie it was discount

Vicky discount

Vicky come on Harriet we'll get your

money back right now I think Bonnie and

Clyde are in their

room oh uh tell Joan I'm returning her

gold earrings and I think I should warn

her about what well they're fake I

barely got to the mirror before my ears

turned

green finding those earrings are real

your ears are

fake oo my my my mine now what is this

oh that's uh nothing it's just a genuine

fur stole that I got for Joan

oh on your

[Music]

salary it is absolutely Divine now why

didn't she wear this to the banquet why

why why well because she's uh because

she's allergic to it you see it uh it

makes her break out oh me too in Envy I

have always craved a stole like

this oh I love it it is me all

over oh you did say that Jon was

allergic to it do you think she'd want a

sell it no I'm afraid not Bonnie well if

she can't wear it why

not honey to tell you the truth the fur

is hot that's right it's supposed to

keep you

warm no no no what I mean is the fur is

stolen of course that's why they call it

a fur

stole Bonnie read my hand the fur is

stolen yes and how much do you want for

it Bonnie I can't sell you the fur in

good conscience all right then let's use

my my conscience it's not so

good how much did you pay for it

$150 sold I'm just on my way from the

bank and I've got that much on me here

you go no I don't think Jan would

approve no sorry all sales are

final well haret got her money back and

went

home you like

it did just sold it to me what well

honey I tried to talk her out of it but

she insisted

yes I know a good bargain when I see one

and look on the bright side Joan it

looks better on me than it does on

you Bonnie I can't let you have that fur

it was well it was a gift from Ted it

has sentimental value for me in that

case of course Joanie dear you can buy

your fur back thank you as soon as you

come up with the full amount what do you

mean well the price is now $500 take it

or leave it

that is highway robbery oh how can you

put a price tag on sentiment bye-bye

give me that fur not until you meet my

price I've never heard anything fre give

me some time and you will

L well honey uh we tried but look on the

bright side I mean we got our money back

and uh Bonnie is now the proud owner of

a very expensive for sto more expensive

than you think that's a lot of money to

pay for a three-legged Fox

[Laughter]

huh oh it's fake the dead cat after

all Mom Dad guess what my TV's fixed it

works how'd you fix it Vicki watch this

great isn't the picture kind of fuzzy oh

that's no problem I just have to adjust

the special

antenna I that's a perfect picture it's

like that I can also change channels

[Music]

[Applause]

she's a

small

Wonder lovely and bright and soft girls

she's a

small

Wonder a child un like other girls she's

a miracle and I grant you she'll enchant

you at her sight she's a

small Wonder brings love and laughter

every

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]