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01x03 - Episode 5 & 6

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Vegetable Soup". Aired: September 22, 1975 – December 14, 1978.*
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Episodes are made up of a mix of live action, cartoon, puppetry, and mixed-media segments.

01x03 - Episode 5 & 6

Post by bunniefuu »

[Music]

[Laughter] [Music]

and now today's adventure of outerscope 1 the march to the throne hi I'm Willy

when me and my friends built our spaceship out of scope one we never dreamed we'd end up on such a strange

planet this isn't good this isn't good at all

we can't be sure they may be friendly they certainly don't look friendly

we're cut off from outer scope what are we going to do there's no escape yes

there is the path is open we'd better run for it

[Music]

[Music]

what are those creatures up there don't move but trapped by steam Jets silence I

am King scrub and I am Queen polish we

are the rulers of sani land sunny land

is the cleanest land in the universe

outsider what land do you come from speak outsider we come from Earth earth

I never heard of Earth earth is by the

Sun what Sun there are hundreds of suns

thousands of Suns millions of Suns but

there is only one Sanny land the cleanest land in the universe earth is

clean too just because you never heard of it doesn't mean it's not clean

this place Earth cannot be clean and you cannot be clean only sunny land is clean

Oh outsiders are dirty but you don't even

know us we might be just as clean as you are you said yourselves you never met any

earth people before so how do you know we're dirty we do not have to know you

to know you are dirty we know ourselves

and we are clean the cleanest but you

must be dirty how can you tell because if you were clean you would look

like us that doesn't mean we're dirty I took a bath every day and I always brush

my teeth and I comb my hair I scrubbed my fingernails and I wash my hair that

is not enough we've brought that we polish and lock and caught this nip and

and brush heads rate and star weekly with me

ol Sammy matters of me where the key is

Sendai

[Music]

therefore you must be dirty all outsiders are dirty

[Music]

our deal what can we do it's getting hotter and there's no way

to reason with them well we've just got to keep on trying they don't care what

we say to them they've already decided we're dirty and dirty is the worst thing

you can be around here they say we're dirty just cuz we're not from sani Landers don't look like them but we're

not dirty we're clean if they only got to know us I'm sure they would like us we just have

to make them listen Russell bacon this place well I'm gonna try it I'm gonna

try to convince them we're okay

to be continued next time the trail is

discovered [Music]

what you want to be when you grow up what you want

[Laughter] [Music]

[Applause]

[Music] [Applause]

[Music]

[Music] [Applause]

[Applause]

[Music] hi I'm Bob small offense from a North

American Indian iron worker [Music]

I'm a mohawk my uncle is an ironworker my father's an ironworker and I'm trying

to be in Iowa it takes a lot of work to be one when you set steel it's um you

have to have teamwork with it because no one man can do it alone every man has a

specific job to do and it wasn't that way I know buildings would be accomplished

[Music]

some points view is still working it's like working on a large erector set and

I know just about everyone had an erector set really it's just adding

piece by piece and you're following a plan specific plan or ties you're which

pieces go where and do anything it's in a huge scale and there's a lot of other

people working with you most behind most of the North American Indians for my

reservation anyway seems to someone in

their family was an iron worker or steel work whatever you want to call it and it

just seems to be a tradition or something and they follow down

being an i orca [Music]

sometimes when I come into the city with my wife and my son it's a nice feeling to show them the tall skyscrapers that I

have put up it's a nice feeling to know that in a hundred years the buildings

will still be there even though I'm not [Music]

that would have stole the American

language which is mostly English was born when the first European settlers began to borrow Native American words to

describe the surprising and wonderfully strange things of the new world I say

I've never seen one of those before I think I'll call it an aeroplane we call

it Seekonk wa awfully good name mind if I borrow it I'll find something else to

call an aeroplane before they arrived in America the Europeans had never seen a

possum or a muskrat had never seen a hickory tree nor tasted a pecan they had

never worn a moccasin never rode in a kayak

never slept in a teepee so of course they had no words of their own to call

these things the Native Americans had words for them for these things were not

strange and foreign to the people who had lived here all their lives this animal they called H and this red

binkham this beast was known as a nice

suit a Narragansett word meaning he trims are cut smooth which refers to the

animals eating habit of stripping off all the lower branches and bark of a tree for food

[Music] the English borrowed these native-american words but being poor

spellers and pronounces slowly changed them until segawa became Scott

Oh Chuck woodchuck rebuking raccoon and musu the animal

that strips things smooth became known as a most pungent of Native American

words words like Sequoia and squash

hominy and succotash Terrapin and

chipmunk igloo and tomahawk underwent

this type of translation they are known as loanwords where they'll lend to us

from the languages of the Native Americans we have borrowed from other languages as well from Spanish German

Chinese African Italian from practically

all the people of the world but it was the words loaned to us by the Native

Americans that began to change from English to what we call today the

American language [Music]

why don't you make a new friend make a new friend make a new friend today my

name is Cindy Joseph and my Native American name is bumble bee this is my

father his Native American name is young Eagle that's my mother and these are my

brothers we live in New York State we

all dance together at powwows those are special occasions where Native Americans get together

[Music] we get to see beautiful beadwork

[Music]

[Music] [Laughter]

my mother's been teaching me how to do beadwork too

[Music]

when I grow up I want to be a teacher and I'll show my Native American outfit to the class

I only wear Native American outfits to

powwows but my friends like to see them my father showed my friends his peace

piping I spend time learning about special traditions

[Music] but most of the time I'm with my friends

I like my name to be bumblebee and I

like being a Native American for most of all I like being myself

[Music]

to introduce you [Music]

my name is Martin I have a pet snake now mom I'm gonna take the bite to the shop I'm gonna be out of the house most of

the day and what about Mary still no problem I'll see guys it's Kate someplace up high okay remember to lock

up okay and don't forget your key okay and be careful okay okay that one's made

trouble for me by pretending Nigel bit him here's Pat now what am I gonna say

hi no no that's that's okay I will

oh thanks well did you get anything

it's move light flash shirt horn radio all in one I saved up all my money for

it I bet it was expensive I think I'm gonna have to leave my advice here you see the

gears lock and we see the pail there that's tough gear here that is gone

right missus just frozen solid won't move it off yeah guess you are gonna

have to leave it are you gonna walk home well I thought I might go over to the bullion bollo little do you like bowling

Oh crazy around bowling you got some time what a bowl sure let's do that

just wait hear me

[Music]

why don't we cut through the park it's wet shorter yeah but what about the brook we can walk the bike through I do

it all the time okay hey you dropped the key oh boy my

mother would tell me if I lost this she has this thing about locking the house you'd think some burglar was just

waiting to break in did you know the world's is crawling with burglars

[Music]

[Music] you see sometimes when you don't know somebody very well the kind of insight

and advancing he's not gonna like it yeah boy that's happened to me even with

somebody I dunno like the time the IG was stolen and the first person I thought of was Clary and it was all

wrong yeah things really turn out different than you expect sometime

[Music]

in bitten by any bros lately I was sort

of wondering if you were gonna bring that up I was just teasing I got over that thing no really I do feel bad about

that stupid lie I was sorry the minute was out of my mouth I just didn't know how to take it back in a way it was a

compliment you wouldn't have done it if you didn't think Nyjah was special even if he is kind of an underdog in the pet

world it's good to stick up for the underdog makes you feel like you can stand on your own two feet you should get a boa a

girl boa I bet your Niger would live back and soon we'd have half a dozen

little baby Boas and both our mothers would kick us out of the house

[Music] [Applause] [Music]

[Applause] [Music]

[Music]

[Music]

[Music]

swollen oh she minutes broken don't talk

crazy basketball practice starts next week well I can I can move it a little

I'll tell you what [Music]

almost ready [Music]

Thanks thanks for taking me home and starts hey since I cheated you out of

the bullying why don't you come in a little you like monopoly better watch you out on my listen I promised my

mother I'd get other papers so let me do that and I'll be right back and I'll beat you with one foot soaking at a foot pad here mom I just got here

why are you listening huh hey what happened here I just asked you that did

you leave the window open of course not I had you know what must have been a

burglar I wonder why I left it all behind something was too scared my job

of course and what happened to that marvelous watchdog of Larry's probably

sleep somewhere but Nigel's here say it mom Nigel's a hero

[Music]

we're resilient from the heat the other

[Music]

do we know what color the first humans were no not even scientists can tell the

color of a person's skin from looking at bones and bones are all that remain after the millions of years since the

first humans were alive but let's see if we can make a good guess what color they

were here's a map of Africa and part of Asia the earliest traces of humans have

been found in these hot sunny land now here people who live in these lands

today their skin colors are of various shades of brown which protect them from

the strong sunlight in that part of the world so we can make a guess that the

first humans were of various shades of brown neither as dark nor as light as

many people are today lecture was a good

movie it sure was I didn't understand it the good guy was wearing the white hat

and the bad guy was wearing the black hat but who was to do with no hair

[Music]

[Music]

[Laughter] [Applause]

[Music]

and now today's adventure of outerscope 1 the trail is discovered hi i'm really

i'll spaceship out of scope one crashed on a weird planet and my friends and i

are prisoners of the creatures that live here how are we gonna get away go on will he see if you can get their

attention ask him to let us go as I was

telling you mrs. tidy I enjoy doing a nice thorough brushing before breakfast

start the cleaning early that's my motto oh I do agree mr. neat I do agree get

the just while you're fresh and eager that's the best way mrs. tidy mrs. tidy

look here what is it mr. neat dirt dirt dirt on a public saniland walkway how

can that be fine never saw such a thing in my entire life never we must tell Kim

the scrub and Queen polish they all know what to do they'll find the criminal and

punish him punish him good quick let's

take some evidence your Majesties King

scrub and cream polish I want to say

something speak outsider but beware do not soil us

with your words clean words your

Majesties we don't want to make you mad honestly not by what we say or by what

we do then watch what you say and yes your majesty we didn't come here

to make trouble we crashed on sandy land by accident our home is on earth and

earth isn't at all like sandy land there is no place like sunny land now just a

minute maybe sandy land is cleaner than Earth but it certainly isn't as friendly

on our planet we try to be nice to strangers and make them feel at home

especially if they need help we think that's more important than whether someone is clean or dirty

in fact on earth people believe in all kinds of things not only in being clean

like you sandy Landers but in other things too oh dear mr. neat this is so shocking so

shocking dirt on a saddle and walkway just wait until Kings scrub and queen

polish find out they'll be so angry bubbles will come out of their ears we

are not like you Sandy Landers here everybody believes in only one thing being clean that's what you really care

about being clean true outsider clean is

good clean is sani land who in all of

San E land would commit such a crime I simply can't imagine once in my

great-grandmother's time a crazy razor did something like this

continue outsider well another thing we believe is that all people are innocent

until they are proven guilty and that means you cannot say we're dirty until you prove it until you have real

evidence [Music] clean polish dirt

dirt on a Sally land walkway what what

is this you are saying look it's dirt

it's dirt yes they did it there can be no question

they must be punished [Music]

oh no this is the worst thing yet this could mean the end of us

gee Willie they must have found the trail of breadcrumbs do why did you drop to mark the way back to outer scope but

breadcrumbs are in dirt well it looks like the sandy lattice thinks so and we

were so close to getting free how are we

gonna talk our way out of this one to be continued next time

Betty surprises them all [Music]

hello I heard you playing and I wonder if you're practicing for a concert I'm

not practicing for a concert right now but I am practicing in order to stay in shape as one must if you want to perform

well just like you eat everyday in order to remain strong to do anything that you want to do is

that harpsichord music no it isn't harpsichord music it's ragtime music written for the piano but I'm just

relaxing and having me a little fun and I love the way it sounds on the harpsichord I hope you don't mind but I

brought some friends mine can you stay and listen to the music oh certainly I'd be glad if they stayed in fact I like it

when people listen to me play that's part of what I do for a living would you

like there's some real harpsichord music now okay

[Music]

my name is Francis Cole and I'm a solo concert harpsichordist I became

interested in music from the day I was born but I actually started my formal music lessons as a pianist when I was

three years old then later on when I was about the eleven years old I started I

added the violin and a little bit later I played the flute and then later on the

organ and then of course basically the harpsichord the chief difference between

the harpsichord and the piano is the way the sound is produced the jack which

holds a plectra plucks the string as you press the keyboard down

[Music] one of my dreams and aspirations would be to communicate my feelings about the

harp support to as wide an audience as possible I enjoy the instrument so much that I

can't believe that everybody can't share the same feelings about it [Music]

[Music]

[Music]

[Music]

[Music]

now remember this part that I played [Music]

[Music] does that make you think of jumping in

the water and swimming I thought of Charlie Chaplin going through a revolving door with the man

and they're bombing door with them afraid me happy weather applet of Revis happen to the

woods sometimes I can make the harpsichord sound like another instrument see if you can tell me what

instrument this makes you think of [Music]

[Music] my name is rock and never stop what you

hear is the rattle of a maraca a maraca

that's right rubber head the maraca is a musical instrument very popular in many

spanish-speaking countries that's

escucha el sonido de la maraca escucha el sonido de la maraca let's make a

maraca you mean vamos a construir una maraca

take a balloon and drop in some rice blow up and tie ok that's nice now into

the opening insert a stick to serve as a handle right on that's slick

ruler some tape coming up surely wrap it

around till it's tied up securely cut strips of newspapers a really easy order

dip them in a mixture of flour and water the pieces we've made are called paper

mache apply them in layers it's working

Olay will have to allow it to dry for a while then add decorations Mexican style

the maraca is dry there's no need to wait okay g*ng let's decorate the maraca

sound is terribly sweet for rhythm it cannot really be beat but for me the

very biggest treat is to play the maracas in my big red truck

[Music]

we made and look Julia there's our

Haitian from you can't beat our instruments well maybe you can you know you can make

your own musical instrument using things you find around the house it's easy just watch find an old washboard and a

thimble for your thumb place it next to your chest and strum strum strum hey

potato grater forget that last pound we need you for some groovy sound scrape it

with a really pencil and forth and you know a toy hammer makes that instrument talk washboard grater add the cover of a

pot everybody play now what else we got

[Music]

well you can't really have a musical discussion without a section of

percussion bass in laundry basket paper basket neat upside down you go let's

hear that beat now do your thing

you're a sensation that's what I call syncopation let's add a triangle yeah

why your hunger find a healthy nail already banger have you ever made a comb

kazoo folds of tissue paper into rap the

T in the fold once it's inside place it to your lips just hum and slide

[Music]

I think a rattle would be very nice for adding some latin-american spice stuff

three or four clips into a balloon

blow up and tie then shake in tune look out for friends with pins beware

oh you'll end up with a bang and lots of air

[Music]

you [Music]

not making another shaker follow instructions first you take a couple of

empty coffee cans remove the lids dry

cereal and rice in one find bottle caps and nails back then

okay drop those in the other now you can put back each cover tape the cons

together great shake and top

that sounds first-rate homemade instruments are fun to play in right now

everyone grab your instruments outer

[Music]

if not he'll scare him away at least [Music]

I'd like to introduce you

[Music]

Oh [Music]

my name is Martin and my pet snake is Nigel I'm going on an overnight hike

with Doug is just back from California

ma it's most practical it's been spreading it out all over my room's gonna take a Mack truck to carry it all

in it's a good thing the camping area is not too far away okay mom maybe it looks like a lot but believe me

I need every business well um as long as Safety's first do you have your first-aid equipment what are you gonna

cook on Dougs bring these new sterling stove you really got to be a good camper when use in California you've enjoyed a

regular hiking club really it sounds like a good way to have a reunion yeah we've got an awful lot to catch up on

and hikes a great way to get to know each other again you mean you two against the wilderness

something like that hi doc I can't do the back door I hope it's okay sure

welcome back thank you it's nice to be back I'm glad you brought more camping gear

Martin didn't think you'd have a knob let me see what you got Doug my nose

looks like a great piece of equipment and if you two have to carry food I think we better get in the kitchen and

get it together kanya [Music]

[Applause] good thing it isn't hot almost retired faster you know they say nobody use

trees as markers too many of them look like baby running around these woods

forever I'm lost I can't find my way

home which ways north oh please mr. bear

I don't want to be your supper besides didn't you see the sign saying do not feed the Bears oh please excuse me my

mistake did you hear the joke about the rug in the floor

what did dog say to the floor I've got you covered

Hey look at terrific tree look at that looks like it's hurt it's not moving

let's help let's take it home we'll have to take it home in a box or something the cooking pot we'll put it on Kathleen

now that's not scared to death found the

little bird I had in California I had to let it go when I came back east I bet

you liked California beside grandparents lived in California I just love the time

well you can always borrow my grandparents for a week or two and you can introduce me to everybody as your

cousin from New York what's that do that

I didn't hear anything there it is in sort of a shuffling noise

oh the bear from before oh come on you know there are a lot of little

animals in these woods but nothing we've got to be afraid of

[Music]

hey how about setting up the tent right here looks fine to me

no it's

[Music]

and then we need a pinch of salt and if

you want first melt the chocolate on top of a double boiler you need an old person to help you out from the heat add

the other until the come on down and

jump rope with me I can't Lily I'm not supposed to play with you why not you don't like me

anymore that's not the reason Lily I have a terrible cold

[Music]