03x02 - Kennel Club Blues

[bunniefuu]

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houston

mayday our ship is under as*ault by

amphibians

and they're

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look at all these great bugs

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and a number one top-notch collection

oh that'd be fun jason let's make our

own zoo

our motto could be every bug under the

sun

we could catch butterflies and bluebirds

and crocodiles and more mammoths

we're gonna need a bigger jar

what a wonderful thing it is to hear the

sound of children's laughter on such a

glorious day

look grandma i caught some ladybugs and

an amphibious invader

what fun you know i believe there's an

old fish tank in the attic somewhere

a bit of dirt a few plants makes a

charming little creature home

it's called a terrarium this way you

create a place that's just like the

bug's home

it's nicer than a jar but grand mom

they're a bunch of bugs and one bug

either do we really need to make a

special place for them

they're just bugs oh bugs are god's

creatures too

if you make them pets you need to take

care of them

the good book says a righteous man has

regard for his animal

that means a good person makes sure his

pets have

homes where their needs are taken care

of properly

so they're healthy and happy making a

garden for them sounds complicated grand

mom

i just want a good collection but is a

jar

really a home puppet if what you offer

isn't a home

they should live free to find their own

i think a terrarium sounds

very cool come on grandma let's go find

it all right come along let's get

started

if i put them in a terrarium with dirt

and leaves

they'll just hide what's the point of

having a great collection

i have regard for my animals

i just want to be able to see them

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wow you're a big one

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let's sing a little song with eight

little words but a rocket ship

and flightless birds

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vigil

kevin

three two

one

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captain's vlog stardate summer we've

just picked up michelle

and kevin is stuck in a jar again

of course we're not really worried once

kevin spent

three days stuck in a bottle of lemon

juice

sure he was all puckered up when he

finally got out

but boy could he whistle well his bunk

can be much smaller

i must have loosened it for you well are

you willing to help us

help you with what oh my kevin was

supposed to show you something

show her now kevin lost cattle pillow

wait our mission is to rescue a lost

kitty a cattle pillow actually

and then return it safely to the emperor

of planet kennel how

fun i'm great with animals you should

see my bug collection

i keep them in this jar like the one

kevin was stuck in

answers to 79 79

what's that mean we believe it's the

poor creature's name

79 yuck what kind of name is that for a

little kitty

well it's a whole lot better than ziggle

i mean for a kitty ziggle is a perfectly

acceptable name for a penguin of course

what did you name your bugs i didn't

maybe i should have

what's this when found open lock it for

reward

we figure the emperor must have added

the reward later and so

we've decided to add the reward notice

to the new posters we're making as well

we've been posting them at roadside

beacons all along the space ways

we're coming up on another one now

captain we got an incoming message from

central command

put it on screen with hd million point

two stereo multi surround sound

and 3d high definition supervision

a how about on fax paper with toner uh

right hey paper is very high tech

i've heard of people making airplanes

out of this stuff what's this say

it says that a mysterious figure was at

the lounge this morning

really yes and he bought a gold locket

from another customer for a golden

cattle pillow

the stranger had said wow that sounds

exactly like 79.

did they see which way he went toward

the

catnip nebula stop that this is my

message and i should be the one that

gets to tell everyone what it says

understand yes sir sorry sir

all right then now where were we

stranger

locket golden nebula

ah here we are sincerely commander strap

ah i bet 79's at the catnip nebula

you know i believe that you are correct

then to the nebula it is

bonds now wait i'm the captain i get to

yell something around here

bird's eye there are so

many of them it's like a cattle pillow

collection

i'll bet that there are more than four

of them

there are precisely 157 caterpillars out

there at the present time ah

i was right how are we ever gonna find

number 79 in this swarm

how about we sent kevin out there as a

big cat toy

uh negative captain they're all cats so

they'll all want the cat toy

okay but one of them will be 79 right

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i've got an idea

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i said i was good with animals

don't worry 79 we'll take good care of

you

you know 79 isn't really a name

it's a number i'll call you goldie

for your golden lock-it all right goldie

hold on we're heading home bonsai

everything is going exactly as planned

soon the penguins will be penguins

no more

[Laughter]

i can just hear those ridiculous

penguins now

get the reward get the reward hurry

i'm gonna lock or whatever your name is

oh come on now you can go ahead and

laugh that was pretty funny

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good but not as good as the looks on the

penguins

faces when they open the locket and

oh no look i'm a hamster

oh no that was funny

you could laugh again but master

you are a hamster see

hamster of course i know that i'm a

hamster

don't you two remember putting that

powder into the gold locket

the powder will turn anyone who touches

it into a hamster

remember oh yeah i bought that golden

locket

to put the hamster powder in right

i knew because i'm an evil genius that

when the penguins found that

cat creature they'd open the locket for

the reward touch the powder

and puff three two one pepsis

no more penguins no more problems

oh but why hamster's boss because

then those foolish penguins will finally

know what it is to be me

no stop that the evil laughter i do by

myself

[Laughter]

captain vlog thanks to cadet michelle

we've retrieved the missing pet and are

flying just

zippity kazoom to get her back home

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very strange it's almost as if goldie

doesn't wish to return home

they can't be right doctor there's got

to be something else

hmm my readings indicate a high level of

physical and emotional stress

i'm sure she's just anxious to get home

guys stop worrying i'm the one that

knows animals remember

hey i just remember there's a reward in

that locket

no no captain technically michelle was

the one who recaptured the creature

that's right you earned it michelle open

it open it

i don't want it i didn't rescue goldie

for a reward

i did it because she's just so cute me

too me three me folk me seventeen

percent

five ah i've always been bad at math

for a place called planet kennel there

sure aren't very many animals

i'm the emperor of there she is

you were very bad to wander off the

whole collection just hasn't been the

same without you

collection oh yes i've got the most

extensive collection of cattle pillows

in the galaxy

and 79 is an important part of it

actually your majesty i kind of named

her goldie

after her cold locket how nice well

come inside come inside

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impressive isn't it

i'm the only one to have cattle pillows

organized into patterns see blue gold

blue gold blue gold there

the pattern is complete again wow

that's amazing yes well this kennel

houses hundreds of animals

organized into the most remarkable

patterns

i don't understand why they haven't

opened the locket hamster powder should

be everywhere by now

no one can resist a reward can't we just

make it open you mean by remote control

yes yes of course good call mindless

minion

say goodbye to the penguins as

penguins ten

nine do you really think they're happy

locked up in these cages

they don't look like proper homes for

cattle pillows

they've never complained of course not

they can't

tell you how they feel can we at least

help you

exercise them before we go you may play

outside oh no they'd make a mess of the

yard

anyway i think they're right at home in

their cages

but to be stuck in here just to be part

of a collection seems come on now

i'm the emperor obviously i know what's

best you know i'm great with animals

besides they may not look like it but

they're just a bunch of big bugs

right okay that's good enough for me

i guess but they're your bugs

you should care for them shouldn't you

two one master wait

the penguins are no longer there they've

left the planet

oh those penguins you think you're so

clever to the penguins who i think

are so clever

actually our experience success can be

directly attributed to our impressive

cadet michelle

to uh whatever he said

whatever he said

who once again is safely back home

a good person makes sure his pets have

homes where their needs are taken care

of properly

so they're healthy and happy captain

we've got to go back to planet camel

we've made a big mistake

mistake what did we leave my hair gel

back there no

we left goldie back there it's dark and

cold and she never gets to go outside

and play

relax cadet the emperor said that he was

great with animals

goldie's in fine hands uh pause

i've just heard from the admiral we got

an assignment to planet barbecue

hmm sounds zesty okay everyone to the

ship

wait has anyone seen cadet michelle yes

hurry i did

let her borrow my space bronco too

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hello 69 did i hear something about you

wearing a golden locket

well i wonder where this came from maybe

there's something written inside

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master she's going back to planet canal

yes i see that

oh that means your plank can still work

yes i know

so now you'll probably want me to follow

her actually

let's all follow her well

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young lady i'm here locked in a cage

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emperor i don't see you oh goldie

look at you i can't believe i left you

in this terrible place

oh wait don't touch the motor

why have you become a hamster

oh no jason would just love this

what's with the hamster powder i don't

really know it burst from the golden

rocket when i opened it

ah so that was the reward what villain

did this maybe this is my reward for

being a villain

what do you mean i hate being locked up

in this little cage

now i know how my pets must feel poor

things

look around you i'm responsible for a

far worse crime than hamster powder

i was given the great honor of having

these creatures in my care

and look how i treated them i didn't

understand what their lives were like in

these cages

this isn't a home this is a prison

my grandmother told me a righteous man

has regard for his animal

and i've only had regard for myself not

like you dear girl

i assume you've come back to help 17 i

mean goldie

believe me i'm still learning this

lesson myself

i realize this is no way to treat pets

goldie needs a proper home so i came

back to help her

well there's still time up high there's

a lever

i see it

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trust me hold that lever and this place

is a wild

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hurry

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up

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i see you couldn't resist my reward

after all

now which one of the penguins are you

all you hamsters tend to look alike you

know

michelle you're not a penguin at all

and don't call me that when i'm in the

suit i'm

the evil lord cabot

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no stay out of there no no no no that

stay pickles of here only one hamster

can be in here at a time

and how about i drive for a while

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yes

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emperor are you all right oh that's how

it's cool

emperor i will find you oh no you won't

cavanus

tackle him guys no

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you know he's a lot taller in person

guys guys settle down it's me

so you were changed into a hamster as

well and

wait a minute you go travis this is so

cool

yes but wait

why is there five of you because

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ah it's good to be tall

you'd better run okay run

remarkable the sunlight reverses the

transformation

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well that didn't go the way i'd hoped

get me out of here

hold him hold him kevin hold him

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why do i have this strange urge to run

in a wheel like crazy but not actually

go anywhere

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[Applause]

we're so sorry michelle actually

michelle

i don't think that this is an ending i

think it signals a new beginning

for all of us this is going to be the

best animal home in the whole

galaxy from now on

michelle it's goldie

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emperor what's happening

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wow you sure caught a lot of fireflies

while i was gone

i almost hate to let these guys go well

we can't keep them caged up in a jar

but the terrarium might fix this is so

cool

i know but it's still nothing like the

real home

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i guess the adventure you told me about

made you think differently about

animals huh i learned how important it

is to make a real home for your pets

well we still have the best zoo ever

right in our garden you said it jason i

couldn't use a hamster though

jason

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you