Beyond Prognosis (2024)

[bunniefuu]

[water sounds]

[Yannis] I have confidence

in myself,

...I have confidence in life,

I am a blessed person

with a lucky star.

I will walk again.

Yes, I will walk again.

[monitor beeping]

[monitor beeping]

[Yannis] Originally,

the idea was just to ride

my bike every day

and hangout with my friends.

[indistinct chatter]

[Yannis] A simple shared

passion we reinvented

each time coming up

with crazy new ideas.

[Yannis] To be honest,

they weren't always

the most brilliant ones.

[indistinct chatter]

[Yannis] But when

you live some place

lost in the middle

of nowhere,

you've got to be creative

or you get bored, real quick.

We were free,

a bit foolish, yeah, but man...

we sure were happy.

And that is something they

can't ever take away from us.

At some point,

I started dreaming.

I pictured myself standing

on the top steps of podiums,

being on a team,

with sponsors and all that,

living from my passion

and becoming the best.

[squeals]

But I realized

that chasing your dreams

doesn't protect you

from anything.

It actually makes you

more vulnerable.

And one day,

you don't know why

it happens to you.

The dream stops

and all that's left

is darkness.

You close your eyes

and there's nothing

there anymore.

So, you have to be quick

and start looking for it again.

Because dreams fade away

if you don't concentrate

on them hard enough.

So, I set about searching

for the dream of that kid

who used to goof around

on his bike with his friends

on a little village lost

at the tail end of a valley,

and whose life

had been broken into.

[car engine]

[laughs]

[panting]

[groans]

[laughs]

[Yannis] It was the start

of the French championship

and I just returned from

the World Cup in Leogang.

I just got my first

top-20 result

and I was over the moon.

I woke up super early

and got to the tent

before everyone else.

Like seriously motivated.

[honking]

Maybe a bit too much.

And then, suddenly,

everything stopped.

[whistle]

[panting]

[phone ringing]

[Yannis] First,

the doctor arrived.

[helicopter blades]

Next, paramedics rushed up

and said it's serious.

That's when

you start asking yourself

lots of questions:

"What's happening?"

"Why can't I feel my legs?"

[Yannis] Two minutes

and one sentence...

That's all it took

to destroy everything.

And when the doctor

told me it's over,

that I'd probably

never walk again,

my world collapsed

and crushed my dreams

at the same time.

Right now,

I want to feel

the scratchy hospital sheets

but the only sensation

is tingling

and a weight pinning

my legs to the mattress.

Like they're buried in sand.

So, this is what it's like

to be paralyzed.

Half buried.

Alive up top...

and dead down below.

[Yannis] After about three

or four days I think,

I got my stuff back,

my phone, a few things...

And there I saw the flood

of messages I received,

it was incredible.

From the entire cycling family,

from loved ones,

from buddies...

They gave me a real boost.

I kept telling them

that I was fine,

that it was a tough moment

to go through

but that I'd bounce back,

you know?

When the doctor told me

that I wouldn't

be able to walk again,

it was impossible for me

to believe.

Literally impossible.

I can't spend my life

in a wheelchair.

[Yannis] First,

you close your eyes

and activate your neurones.

In your mind, a spark

emerges from the darkness.

It ignites an electric current

that starts running

through your body.

It goes down your neck,

passes through your back,

connects your vertebrae

and frees your spinal cord.

The electric current keeps going

and knows where to go

and knows the path by heart.

It descends

through your chest,

down to your legs

and all away to your toes,

and every time

it touches a muscle,

it sparks and creates

new pathways.

On the outside,

nothing is happening

but inside, thousands of sparks

enlighten up your body.

And now, these

electric currents

send impulses

to all your muscles,

making them move together.

Your legs unfolding,

your feet sinking

into the ground.

But you're not

just moving forward...

you're making

your dream come true.

But when you open your eyes,

reality slaps you

in the face.

I've been doing this every day

for three weeks now and...

still no movement.

It has to work.

It will work,

no doubt about it!

I believe it,

I'm beyond certain.

I have a lucky star,

I trust life,

and I will walk again.

But I need more time

and I have less

and less of it.

[Yannis] When I was doing

my visualizations,

I felt a very strong

state of tranquility.

Like I was floating

in a parallel world.

I could feel this current

flowing downwards,

as if my spinal cord

was heating up.

This current

spreads through my nerves,

my legs and my muscles.

I could tell if

my visualization was right

when I could feel

the tingling in my legs.

It made me believe

in it like a rock.

Because if I had sensations

in my legs,

then something

was happening.

[Yannis] In any case,

I never believed

the prognosis.

I've been in this hospital room

for 73 days.

I'm stuck between these walls,

thinking the same

positive thoughts

and visualizing

the same positive outcome.

At night,

I do the physio exercises alone,

in my room and bed.

I try to move my legs,

I try to get up.

And even though

it would be easier

to just accept my situation,

to stop fighting...

I never lose hope.

[water]

[squeals]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[panting]

[indistinct chatter]

[panting]

Yes!

[laughs]

[indistinct chatter]

[indistinct chatter]

[cheering]

[cheering and applauding]