01x11 - Episode 11

[bunniefuu]

[♪ opening theme song playing]

[Hirai] What are you mad about?

You're always pissed off, aren't you?
Grumpy girl.

Shut up.
You can't just show up without telling me.

It's embarrassing
being with you in public.

Come on, you gotta be kidding me.
You're shy?

I can't stand how adorable you are.

What? I'm not shy, I'm just irritated.

You're always irritated, aren't you?

And exclusively toward me.

Is this a privilege
granted only to your boyfriend?

Yeah, something like that.

[Hirai] I kinda like that.

[Yayoi gasps]

Hey, you may not know this,

but couples hold hands
in situations like this.

[gasps] Of course I know that!

Yeah, yeah, you're so damn cute,
aren't you, you little rascal?

Hey, this is no time to be fooling around.

Murai is about to be ex*cuted!

I saw that too.

What do you mean, "ex*cuted"?

He's nothing but a hero
for doing that on TV.

You are a genius-level idiot, aren't you?

What should we do?

[Chairman] Let's do this.

What the heck are you guys doing?

[Principal] Vice-Principal,
please be quiet.

[Vice Principal] No, no, no.

For once, I cannot sit back
and brownnose you two.

We're talking about an improper
student-teacher relationship.

How can I stay quiet?

Of all students, it's Murai,
an honor student with a promising future.

His grandfather is CEO
of the renowned ONG Corp!

His father is the president!

He comes from a very wealthy family
that's donated generously to this school.

And why Tanaka?!
What kind of world do we live in?

How would you explain this to the PTA?

Getting rid of Tanaka is easy enough,
but Murai is a bit more complicated...

I saw it!

[Chairman] I completely saw it, Principal.

[Principal] That's wonderful, Chairman.

Please listen to me.

I saw Yamakado-sensei.

[Vice Principal] Listen!

So what about Yamakado?
How is this about him?

Vice-Principal, don't be so hasty.

You're not young.

You shouldn't raise your blood pressure
so recklessly.

[Vice Principal] With all due respect,
Chairman...

[Chairman] Shut up!

Let's wait for them to return.

I'm sure Yamakado-sensei
will take care of it.

GOOD MORNING, YAMAKADO

CALL ME BACK ABOUT THIS MATTER ASAP

Those assholes. Damn you, damn you.

[narrator] The whole thing fell on him.

[Principal on pa] Welcome back,
second-year students.

Good to see you all.

Now, we need to see some of you
in the principal's office.

[narrator] Tanaka and Murai,
who involuntarily made their TV debut.

[Principal] Murai from Class 2-1
and the homeroom teacher, Tanaka-sensei.

[narrator] The one to blame, Kiriyama!

And the head teacher who was unreasonably
entrusted with their fate, Yamakado.

[Yamada] Boy, what a mess.

[Principal on pa] Head teacher,
Yamakado-sensei,

please come to the principal's office
immediately.

[Yamada] Good luck.

-[Kiriyama] Yamakado-sensei.
-[Yamakado] Yes.

Please allow me to participate
in the interrogation session.

[Yamakado] Why?

[Kiriyama] Because I'm the one
who caused all this.

I'm sorry for my incompetence.

I don't care what happens to me,
I just want to help them.

[narrator] Tanaka,
when asked to explain the matter,

got down on her knees,

a gesture she had only ever made
to official pics and divine manga artists.

[Tanaka] I am solely responsible for this!

That's not true! She had no choice.

[Murai] If anyone was at fault,

it was me for not being able to control
my gushing emotions.

[Tanaka] Just for five minutes,
could you please shut up?

[Vice Principal] Come on, Murai!
I told you to wait in the hallway!

[Principal] There's nothing we can do
about what has already happened,

but considering what's ahead,
please tell us the facts.

Are you two actually in a relationship?

-We will be in the near future.
-[Tanaka] Dumbass!

I beg you,
will you please shut your mouth?

If there was ever a time in your life
to remain silent,

now is that time!

We're not asking about your aspirations.
Just tell us the facts as of right now.

Tell us, Tanaka-sensei.

[Vice Principal] You two
seem to be very close.

-As I was saying...
-[Yamakado] Pizza delivery!

-Pizza pizza pizza...
-[Principal] Yamakado. What did you say?

[Yamakado] A student confessed to me

that the immoral act in question
was part of a dare.

Is that true?

Yes, it's true.

It was the last day, and...

We got carried away during a card game.

I'm the one who told him to do it.
It wasn't their fault. I'm sorry.

Kiri, what are you saying?

They got carried away on the school trip
which led to something terrible,

but their motives were silly
and they're sorry for what they did,

so please go easy on them.

-That's not...
-Also.

I can prove here that these two
are not in a relationship.

[Tanaka] Huh?

[Yamakado] This is for you.

SQUEEZE

I never thought I'd announce it like this.

But as a matter of fact,
Tanaka and I are in a relationship,

and this is my marriage proposal to her.

So there's no way she's in a relationship
with Murai, one of her students.

Does that clear things up?

Yes, we completely understand.

[Yamakado] Given all of this,

I'd appreciate if you could give them
a light penalty for this incident.

Understood.

Dismissed.

[Murai] Sensei...

Sensei!

[Kiriyama] It's all my fault.

I'm really sorry, Murai.
I felt like I had no choice.

Your happiness is my happiness.

Honestly, I'd risk anything for you,
use any means necessary for your sake.

But before I knew it...

The vision of your happiness with Tetsuko

was becoming hazier and hazier.

If this were the Stone Age,

I would've k*lled him
before this could happen.

But now that I'm bound
by Hades, God of the Underworld,

I don't think I can compete with him.

I mean, I'm beginning to feel foolish
for ever thinking

that a mere mortal
could beat the God of the Underworld.

My heart is about to be shattered.

Just like your love is shattered.

[narrator] Two days had passed
since Murai,

petrified by the psychological shock,
fell into a coma.

-[all crying]
-This was during a substitute holiday

after the school trip.

Everyone, stop crying.

He's just sleeping, okay?

[Yasutoshi] Would you like
some afternoon onigiri?

-Yes, please!
-Yes, please!

Why is Murai so obsessed
with Tanaka-sensei?

I know, right? Why is he, Hirai?

You know, I've never wondered about that.
Why is he?

How am I supposed to know?

-[Yayoi] Maybe Kiri knows...
-I don't.

I didn't even know he had those feelings
in the first place.

How can you not know?
You've known him longer than me.

You should know something.

You wanna fight?

[Hitomi] Hey,
your delinquent side is showing.

[Hirai] But actually, other than Yayoi,
you two have known him the longest, right?

You don't get it, do you?

Let me lay it all out for you.
We are loyal fans of Murai!

We consider stalker-like acts such as
prying into his private life heretical.

Holding on to this virtue
while supporting one's fave

is the path to true fandom.

[narrator] Fantasizing
is on the table, though.

In other words, no one knows
Murai's five Ws except "who."

How does that make for a good love story?

[Yasutoshi] The five Ws...

That reminds me, a long time ago,
he came home with a bass someone gave him.

I think it was
when he was around ten years old.

When I asked him what happened

and who gave it to him, he turned red.

[young Murai] It's a secret.

[Yasutoshi] I'm sure he was in love.

That's puberty, though.
He wouldn't tell me anything.

But from that day on,
he started growing his hair out

and practicing the bass.

He said he wanted
to be like someone called TenTen.

Then he dyed his hair blonde.

Could that have something to do with
his five Ws?

Sir, do you know where that bass is now?

I don't know why,
but it's always by our Shinto altar.

I asked him why he does that once.

[Yasutoshi] He told me, "Though there's
no such thing as God in this world,

this bass is as close to a divine entity
as an inorganic object can be."

AMATERASU OMIKAMI

[Kiriyama] "As close to a divine entity
as an inorganic object can be."

[gasps]

No wonder even you didn't know.

[Hirai] You've been in love with Tetsuko
for way too long, Murai.

[Hirai] Murai in Love.

CONGRATULATIONS
ON YOUR ENGAGEMENT

[female teacher] Wow!

Congratulations, Tanaka-sensei!

When in the world
did you get Yoshiki to fall for you?

Are you secretly a smooth operator?

Are you having a wedding?

Don't tell me you're pregnant?

FLEE

[Tanaka sighs]

Good morning.

-Head Teacher. Why are you here?
-Because I work here.

-Can I sit here?
-[Tanaka breathes heavily]

What're you freaking about?

This is how I always am.

You can give me the ring back
or you can pawn it.

That was mine,
so it wouldn't fit your finger anyway.

If it's okay to pawn it, I will.

[Tanaka] I was going to
discuss this with you.

Why don't we just pretend
to have an amicable breakup?

Before long, everyone's excitement
will become a bother to you.

It's not a bother at all.

No, no, I can't do this.

It just feels awkward to be a fake couple.

Wanna make it real, then?

No.

[Tanaka] This is one of your jokes,
isn't it?

Saying that out here by the dumpsters
is in pretty poor taste.

Sorry.

I didn't think you were one
to care much about ambience.

Would you like to go out
for dinner tonight?

Will that be on you?

[chuckles]

[Tanaka] You're being kinda creepy.

Oh, God. I have no hope of enticing you.
What am I gonna do?

I'll pick you up at 7 tonight.

Okay.

[Yamakado] So that was the right move.

PLUTO

[can fizzes open]

[Tanaka] Despite myself,
I felt myself get excited.

My instincts seem to be calling
for the head teacher.

Unknown positive emotions, different than
those for my fave, are flooding my brain.

I can't reconcile them.

Is it possible
that the head teacher actually likes me?

-[screams]
-[can crunches]

Because of Murai's
overly straightforward approach,

I have no idea how a normal
three-dimensional guy would make a move.

Okay, let's try fantasizing
the head teacher coming on to me.

[gasps, grunts]

Oh, God. Oh, no, this is bad.

[doorbell dings]

Thanks for waiting.

-You're not braless today, are you?
-No.

I'm wearing a bra and actual clothes.

Adorable.

[Yamakado] All right, let's go.

[exclaims softly]

[Yamakado] Hey, are you all right?

Hot!

[Tanaka] You gotta be kidding.
But dinner...

Let's call it off for today.

Understood. I'm sorry.

[Yamakado] Don't worry. It's fine.

[Tanaka] It must be because
I was fantasizing about weird things.

[doorbell dings]

TALK

What?

[Yamakado] Hey, are you all right?

I thought we called it off.
Why are you back?

I went to buy some stuff
to help you feel better.

Let me use your kitchen.

Does that mean
you're coming into my apartment?

[Yamakado] I won't stay long.

[Tanaka] This is bad.

[narrator] The Otaku Room.

Please give me five minutes to clean up!

[breathes heavily]

[Yamakado] Excuse me.

[Tanaka] Sorry, it's a small place.

If I chose to kiss you right here and now,
would you explode?

Yes, I would.

Then close your eyes before you die.

Am I going to die?

-What?
-Sorry.

I wanted to see
if you really know self-defense.

-You messin' with me?
-[Yamakado] Hey.

Sorry.

[Yamakado] Did you want me to?

Excuse me?

[Yamakado] Did you want me to kiss you?

[no audible dialogue]

[Tanaka] Why are you asking me that?

You sound like you have feelings for me.

I do.

NO WAY

[Yamakado] It's pathetic as hell
for a 32-year-old

to be jealous of a 17-year-old,

but I'm also thrilled
that I can still have such feelings.

Do you think you're unattractive?

Not only do I respect you as a person,
I'm also attracted to you as a woman.

I've come to realize that.

[Tanaka] Crap.

[Yamakado] What about you?

Have you ever seen me

not as your coworker or your boss,
but as a man?

Uh... It's a little hard to say.

[Yamakado] Come on, say it.

How can I say that everything
you do makes you look hot?

Or that I desperately hid all my merch
before you came into my apartment?

Or that I imagined
what you look when you're horny

and wish I had the talent to
immortalize it in an erotic manga?

[Yamakado] How can you blurt out
so many things that make me happy?

[Tanaka] You're kidding, right?
Have you lost your mind?

[Yamakado] I'm just happy to hear
that you were thinking about me.

Thanks for telling me all that.

[Tanaka] Oh, God.

Sir Hitotose!

[Apprentice] What is happening
to your lower body?

[Hitotose] I have always feared
a time like this would come.

Kitty is about to find happiness
in reality.

You may prepare to welcome
a new master of the brain.

[Apprentice] What about you?

[Hitotose] I have fulfilled my duty.

I will soon disappear from here,

but my countless existences
will live on in someone else's mind.

So I'm leaving before I disappear.

A journey into the subconscious.

[Apprentice] Do you have anywhere to go?

It's a long shot, but I have an idea.

[narrator] Inside Murai's brain.

Hi there. How are you?
I'd like to show up in a dream here.

FIVE HUNDRED FORTY-NINE

[receptionist] Please wait
in the waiting room.

How long is the wait?

Due to an extreme psychological shock
he has never experienced before,

Murai is currently undergoing
extensive maintenance.

He is sleeping very deeply,
and we are unable to screen any dreams.

[Hitotose] What the hell is he doing?

[Rice ball] Nigi, nigi!

[Hitotose] Are you telling me
to come with you?

Hey, where are you going?

[Tanaka] Good morning!

Will you shake my hand?

I bet you had a ball
making fun of me, huh?

They're... fresh...

I couldn't stop thinking about you.

I liked it a lot.

I thought his eyes looked like that kid's.

I came to see you.

[Hitotose] These are Murai's memories.

You want me to watch that?

[Murai] I was only in elementary school
when I first met Sensei.

At the time,
I was always alone, reading books.

One day, on my way home from cram school,

I read manga for the first time
at a nearby convenience store.

"It's fun. It's interesting. I like this."

The next day, I secretly bought a manga
called SASUKE No.2.

To read this precious manga
I bought for the first time,

I skipped cram school for the first time.

[boy 1] Hey, look who it is.

It's Murai, that gloomy kid.

So, Murai, you like manga?

An honor student like you?

Wait, this is that manga.
The super boring one.

Oh yeah! The main character's lame,
and the villain is even lamer.

[boy 1] Makes sense that you'd buy
this kinda thing.

Lame people read lame manga, huh?

[boy 2] This one totally sucks.

Destroyman is so much better!

You're a loser
for reading something like this.

[Murai] I didn't mind being ridiculed,

but I couldn't tolerate them making fun
of something I found and liked,

so I tackled them.

They beat me in no time

and took my manga away from me.

I was so frustrated, I wanted to die.

[young girl] Hey, kid.

A real man
would've taken this back himself.

What're you crying for? Pathetic.

Is it important enough to you
to cry about?

It's just a comic book.

Is it...

Is it that good?

What, you're ignoring me?

Come on, let me see that.

It's important to me.
It's not "just" a comic book.

Please don't assume it's worthless
based on your own preconceptions.

[young Murai] Anyway, thank you very much
for getting it back for me.

I will never forget your kindness.

What the hell? You're super polite!

You're right. I'm sorry!

[young Tanaka] People value
different things, don't they?

I mean, you're a weakling,
and yet you stood up to the two of them.

Really, dude.
You're so weak, I could barely watch.

But...

you were cool.

SASUKE NO.2

Seriously, though, let me read it.
I'm curious.

[Murai] From that day on, every Monday,

when the weekly magazine came out,
we would read SASUKE No.2 together.

[young Tanaka] I shouldn't have said
it was just a comic book.

This is really good.

[young Murai] I don't have any friends,
but SASUKE No.2 always cheers me up.

Don't say such sad things.
I don't have any friends either.

[Murai] Every time I saw Sensei,

I often felt like crying
because I was so happy.

She told me that someone she really,
really, really loved played the bass,

and that bass
was something important to her.

She said was going to play onstage
at the school festival.

I had never seen someone
shine so brightly.

[young Tanaka] Yo!

You actually came to see me!

I saw you from onstage.
Did you come on your own?

How was it? Did I look like TenTen?

Well...

[young Murai] You were so cool.

Hell yeah! Awesome! Thank you!

Oh, sorry.

The lyrics were impressive.
That French quote...

French novelist Maurice Bedel once said,

"Love is the shortest path from
one heart to another."

-"A straight line."
-"A straight line."

Yes, that's the one.

I like it too.

I really believe it.

[Murai] That was the moment

my straight line was born.

[♪ closing theme song playing]

NEXT TIME
EPISODE 12