01x02 - The Book of Belonging

[bunniefuu]

I've been staring at the ceiling ♪

Trying to figure out ♪

How we end up here

time and time again ♪

Swallowed up in doubt ♪

Getting arrested

was the worst night of my life.

I ended up being charged

with aggravated as*ault

with three years of probation.

It has been a challenge

going from the scandal to relationship

to miscarriage to arrest

to being pregnant again.

Okay.

After I was arrested,

Dakota and I, like,

we actually never broke up.

We stayed in our relationship,

and I think we wanted it, to be honest.

It might not be the smartest decision

in our situation.

It wasn't, um, but it is what it is.

This place is so cute.

I wanna get a little drinky drink.

Hello.

I got this bundled for you.

You got it? Thank you.

I was so shocked when I found out

Taylor was pregnant.

I, like, couldn't believe it.

-You were shocked?

-Yes!

-I wasn't.

-You weren't surprised?

She's been kind of MIA.

I feel like she's, like,

separated herself from all of us.

I mean, I feel like I would,

if it were me.

She had the swinger scandal,

had an affair with her husband,

then she had her miscarriage with Dakota,

continued breaking it

on and off with Dakota,

then she got arrested,

and now she's pregnant.

It's like, um, when, like, they say

guys, like, think with their d*ck,

that's, like, Taylor.

She thinks with her vag*na.

She does not--

I don't think she thinks with anything.

Love her, but sometimes I'm like,

"Sweetheart, like, it's not that hard."

Yeah.

- Good morning.

- How's it goin'?

-Good. How are you?

-Good.

-Freezing.

-It is cold outside.

I'm so excited to go shopping though.

What all have you bought so far?

Nothing.

You haven't bought anything?

I wanna wait 'til

after the shower to get stuff.

'Cause then you know

what you do and don't need,

-you know?

-Yeah.

I want to invite all of MomTok

to come to my baby shower.

I feel like this would be, like,

a good fresh start.

Did you guys get

her baby shower invite, though?

Yeah.

- Are you gonna go?

- Obviously, yeah. Are you going?

I had one of my last

probation appointments.

-Today?

-Yeah.

-What, what did they say?

-So, this is how it works.

So, I went, like,

once a month every month.

But now, it changes

to every six months, I go in.

So, I don't have to go in every month.

-Which is-- That's a step, ya know?

-Yeah.

So, that's good.

Yeah, we sh--

-We just shouldn't even be there.

-I know.

After the arrest,

I was under so much stress.

I was filmed leaving the jail.

And then that was

immediately on the internet.

It was a blessing in disguise.

It helped me, like, wake up.

I'm not gonna go through

this again, Taylor.

I can't.

You've aged me, like, 10 years.

I've aged myself.

It's put a very, I'd say,

negative image on MomTok.

I think that something needs to change.

We need to get back to what MomTok

was before all of this happened.

Well, do you wanna exclude her from it?

Like, what are you saying?

I just think, like,

let's change the culture.

The swinger scandal,

sure, we got a lot of eyes,

we got a lot of publicity from it,

but I feel like ever since the arrest,

it's been the complete opposite.

And I know for a lot of people,

like, brand deals have gone down.

We need to make sure that

we have a good reputation on social media

because brands aren't

gonna wanna work with us

if they think we're goin' to jail

and throwin' stools at a wall.

We need to make sure to just

completely get rid of that culture

because it's our livelihood.

Right now, I feel like we're,

like, holding on a thread here.

- Yeah, I feel like it's, like, rocky.

- Mm-hm.

And I feel like it's gonna

take at least one of us

to kinda step up

to keep the group going.

I feel like it's almost weird today

doing content without Taylor.

Yeah?

-Just feels different, ya know?

-Yeah. It is weird.

I'm just like

It's overwhelming.

Like, I feel like, right now,

I just have a lot on my plate.

And Dakota's, like,

talking about marriage a lot.

-And I'm not quite--

-Mm-hm.

I'm not fully in.

I'm so scared to, like,

just get hurt, I guess.

I've done, like, everything

to, like, push him.

I think it's more of a test.

Like, "Are you gonna stay here with me

through, like, thick and thin," ya know?

And so, I've done these things where

I'm like-- tried to push him himself.

He's like, "You're trying to ruin this.

Like, you wanna ruin this."

And he's like, "You're gonna do it

eventually if you keep trying it."

My due date's in six to eight weeks.

And

I don't know if, um,

I'll, like, ever forgive myself.

And that's why

I've, like, really pushed Dakota

because I don't feel like I deserve

this, like, happy ending life.

And I think that's, like, something,

like, I learned in therapy, like.

I just, like, kinda struggle,

um, and I'm, like, terrified.

Sorry. I can't talk.

I know. I don't want you to,

you to feel that way.

And I think that's why

I had, like, a psychotic break

is because I don't know

how to handle it.

And that much hurt that I had at one time,

and, and the whole

social media was watching,

and I didn't know what to do.

After the arrest, I lost a lot of friends.

I miss having the close friendships.

So, I would like to just kinda start over,

beginning with my baby shower.

Oh, gosh, I'm sorry.

I'm gonna put some lip gloss on

and act like I didn't have

a meltdown in the car.

Oh, thank you.

- I know. It's cute, huh?

- Yeah.

Hallelujah ♪

Listen up ♪

I'm the one you've been dreaming of ♪

I've got everything

you could ever want ♪

Try me and you'll see ♪

I'll bring you to your knees ♪

Baby, you're gonna believe ♪

Lead us not into temptation ♪

Lead us not into temptation ♪

Temptation ♪

Please, Lord.

Make me the biggest star

the world has ever known.

Should we start flying after?

My biggest thing surviving

as a working mom with young kids

is self-care and hanging out

with my close girlfriends.

I feel like I need

to be on a chair.

Please, Lord.

Make me the biggest star

the world has ever known.

That was it.

Taylor used to be the face of MomTok.

And then,

when that all blew up,

no one really knew

what MomTok stood for anymore.

I feel like if MomTok is gonna

remake its image,

it's up to the rest of us

to step up and make it happen.

I know you don't wanna make a TikTok,

but we've gotta pay the bills.

I mean, who else is

gonna pay the bills, right?

Who is currently, like,

the breadwinner at home?

- I think all of us.

- Yeah, definitely me.

- For sure.

- Oh, all of us.

-Really?

-Yeah.

-We all are!

-Look at us!

Social media's been, like,

the greatest blessing in that sense.

I feel like we haven't done

a brand deal in a long time.

Zero November. Zero December.

And then I got three in January.

I wonder if holidays were just slow.

The past year has been

a little rough going for MomTok

after Taylor's arrest,

but we still wanna keep MomTok going.

And I think it's up to us

to keep everything flowing.

I had one brand deal, like,

going into the holidays.

-Yeah.

-And then dry.

What's the weirdest deal you've gotten?

Me and Jen got one.

- What?

- A bladder-- What was it?

After giving birth, like,

your pelvic is just so weak

that you could sneeze

-and, like, pee yourself.

-Wasn't it for diapers?

- Yes, it was for diapers.

- I just said yes.

They're--

I'm reading the brief,

and me and Jen are like,

"Wait a minute, are these for diapers?"

I'm like, "Are you doin' it? Okay."

I feel like you probably have had more.

- You have one.

- Yeah. Yeah.

- Don't you?

- Yeah.

Do you have a weird brand deal

you wanna share with us?

Guys, I genuinely need

your opinion on something.

What?

Okay, so I got this offer.

And it's, like, I'm not gonna lie,

like, the money is really good.

I'm like, "How much we talkin'?"

- Twenty?

- Two hundred?!

-Two hundred thousand?!

-No! Wait, wait.

- 20,000.

- 20,000.

- Twenty.

- Okay.

- Twenty.

- For what?

- It's really good money, okay?

- What is it? What the--

Oh, goodness.

♪♪

What the--

What is it? I can't see.

Just, like, pleasure toys for days.

What the fuh is this?

Whitney Leavitt, from spreading

the Good Word door-to-door

to spreadin' the word about vibrators.

Who would've thought?

Congratulations.

-Is that a little microphone?

-Aw, karaoke.

- Are you gonna sing into that?

- Aaah ♪

Stop.

- Here, you wanna see 'em?

- Oh, this one has my name on it.

Oh, Demi, that one's for you.

- The Demi Wand!

- The Finger Pro!

It's your finger, but better.

Guys, I need to go upstairs really quick.

I'll be right back.

Stop, Layla!

Okay, so what do they want you to do?

Because--

So, okay, so literally,

all I have to do is hold it

- Mm-hm.

- and take a picture.

-Oh.

-Like, just me and post it

on my Instagram, that's it.

In the Mormon religion,

we're very conservative.

I worry about the people

that I grew up with,

specifically my family,

seeing me promote this sex toy

because it's very, very taboo.

I don't know if I'd do it for 20.

I'd probably have to do at least 30.

I know. I don't-- I wouldn't do it for 20.

I'd do it for 100 maybe.

I would do it.

Honestly, I think Whitney should

take the deal for the vibrator.

I honestly don't see anything wrong

with promoting a sex toy.

The amount was still not enough

for me to post that on my feed,

but get that bag, girl.

I personally would never

promote a sex brand.

Sex has been such a taboo topic,

especially within the church for so long,

it's like if we're tryin'

to break the mold and modernize

and get to a place

of, like, normalizing things,

-that starts with us.

-Yeah.

More than just making TikToks,

I just love this group of women

getting together

and having these important conversations.

I also feel like this MomTok group,

especially being in Utah,

is breaking a norm.

We're raising this new generation

and things are changing,

and I'm loving what's changing.

I think that a lot of women,

because of the shame

and lack of knowledge,

I think a lot of women don't even orgasm.

-I would die.

-Yep, yep.

No, I'm deadass. Never in my life.

- Layla!

- You need this.

-I'm, like, scared--

-Take, take this home with you.

My name is Layla Taylor.

I'm 22.

I got married when I was 19.

Me and my husband

were then married for three years,

but we ended up getting divorced,

so I've only ever really dated

about four people.

So, that's not a lot of time

to discover yourself.

Have you tried a toy?

Yeah, and any time I get close

to the feeling of it, I get scared.

-And I, like, stop.

-Yeah.

Two kids, 22, never in my life.

I went to a very Mormon-populated

high school.

So, I'd be like,

"Okay, what's the one thing that

all of my friends have in common?

They're all part of the church."

So, I got baptized

on my own when I was 16.

Being Black in the church,

I have never taken it personally,

but you definitely do stick out

like a sore thumb.

I feel like I'm, like, missing out.

-And I, like, want to, but I just--

-You will. Once you do it once,

-you will wanna do it all the time.

-I know.

You'll be like a teenage boy.

I'm finally hitting puberty!

No, she literally starts levitating.

Ahh!

Do it for yourself.

Don't even do it for him.

'Cause sex isn't just about the guy,

it's about us too, you know?

And the more you enjoy it,

the more they enjoy it.

I don't have that problem.

I enjoy it plenty.

-It's for me.

-Yeah, you definitely are--

I'm like, I ain't worried about

who it's for. Let's be honest.

Before you're married,

it's like sex is taboo.

But then the second

you get married,

you're supposed to be this, like,

porn star for your husband.

We know who the real porn star

is for their husband.

♪♪

No!

Who we lookin' at?

Who we lookin' at?

My name is Jen Affleck.

I am 24 years old.

Zac's gonna k*ll me for this one,

but Ben Affleck is his second cousin.

I'm definitely the first Jen Affleck.

And not only that,

her middle name is the same as mine.

Jennifer Lynn Affleck.

I don't know, maybe we can

convert them to the church.

I am a content creator.

My goal was really just to be able

to provide for my family.

I've always been super comfortable

with my sexuality,

um, which I definitely think

has also gotten me in trouble.

'Cause I am a conservative Mormon,

I do follow all those rules.

I'm not kidding, you inspired me,

like, full, like, for Bret.

- And I've never done anything that--

- Wait, you did it?

- Yes, and it was fun!

- Like, you took a picture?

- Oh, I took so many pictures--

- Wait, I wanna see.

-This is the one.

-Oh, my gosh!

Not again! Not again!

I'm done.

- I don't wanna see!

- There she is in all her glory!

There's the kitty.

Here we are, a group of women in MomTok,

who can inspire other women

to not be ashamed to use a sex toy,

I think is very empowering.

I just worry that my family would be

a bit shocked

by me advertising something like this.

- Holy sh*t!

- It's hot in here.

What?

-Hi.

-Hi.

- Come on in.

- How's it goin'?

- You guys can sit down.

- What are you doin'?

Dishes. What are you guys up to?

Your mom drug me here off of my job sites.

Really?

So, what's so important

you need to talk to us about?

Did you not tell him, Mom?

I did tell him that

Dakota was probably gonna move in.

Not, "Yeah, probably."

Like, yeah, he's moving in.

When?

Today.

Like, now?

Yeah.

I'm very excited for this next step.

One, we have a child on the way.

And I feel like I really just want to

try to move forward, heal,

and really work on our relationship.

I know you guys

prefer marriage before moving in,

but, like, that's obviously not

how it's gonna go, ya know?

I'm not supportive of it.

Why do you have to rush it?

- 'Cause we're having a baby.

- I know, but that doesn't matter.

You'd rather me do it alone?

Yeah, that's the choice

you made when you got pregnant.

In our religion, marriage is, like,

essential to have that partnership.

We believe, like, it's a sacred thing.

That's what me and your mom

have tried to teach you.

The church teaches that we shouldn't live

with a partner outside of marriage.

You already got divorced,

you know, at a young age.

And then you bring Dakota in this

when you don't know if he's 100% sober.

I don't want you to be like,

"Oh, this is not gonna work out.

Okay, I have a baby

from a second daddy."

I don't want a revolving door of men

attached to my daughter

and to my grandkids.

For having this baby out of wedlock,

you guys can be mad all you want,

but he's moving in,

and he's gonna help me with the baby.

That's the goal is to get married.

It's not like I'm having this kid

and I don't wanna get married ever.

You wanna give yourself time

before you marry someone

for the rest of your life, again.

Ya know, like,

it's my second marriage.

-So, it's like I'm-I'm scared.

-Yeah, but again,

you shouldn't have gotten pregnant.

Which is true.

-Is that him?

-Probably.

I'll go say hi and help him.

I'll be right back.

- Hey!

- Hi.

-How's it goin'?

-Here, I'm gonna help you bring

- some boxes in.

- You don't have to, babe.

- You're fine.

- Do you have any light ones?

A lot of 'em are light.

I mean, I'll get most of my heavy stuff.

I just told them that you're moving in

-Look at that one.

-just now.

-Are you listening?

-Oh, sorry. No. What?

-You told 'em?

-I just-- Just now.

-Wait, you just told them?

-Yeah, I know.

That's why he's like,

"Oh, you brought him here?"

He doesn't have anything?

No couches?

Dirty clothes.

Dude, I didn't know your parents

were even gonna be here.

Do they need help?

It's always scary.

- It is scary.

- I'm like, "Uh-oh."

All that gray hair.

They've caused you to go gray.

What can you do?

They don't ever listen to anything

you tell 'em to do anyway, so.

Seriously, do you need any help?

I don't know. I think we're good.

- He doesn't have a whole lot.

- No, yeah.

Like, I have more, but--

So, first of all,

you knock up my daughter

- Oh, my gosh.

- and then--

Dude, hey, that was an accident, okay?

What, you tripped and fell?

Yeah.

Yeah, um--

So, movin' in!

- That's shocking.

- Just found out!

-I know.

-Is that how you were raised

-is you just move in with these chicks?

-No, no, no, no, no, no.

See, here's, here's,

so here's what happened.

- You just knock up girls--

- Ev-- No!

See, everything we did

completely opposite.

I think, like, realistically,

we would've liked to have done it

- The traditional.

- the traditional way.

But, given our situation,

I wanna also help Taylor,

so I just felt like the only way for me

to really do that is to be in here.

I'm excited

to have another life into our family.

Little baby.

But I do have my reservations

about this whole thing.

This is honestly everything

I've ever wanted in my future.

I just never thought it was

possible for me to have.

I do want a family.

I want all those things.

Not only that, I love your daughter.

Like, I-I love her a lot.

And we align a lot on what we want

- in our future together, so.

- Yeah.

Which makes it really nice.

And we talked about that,

like, even just, like, religion, I guess.

As simple as, like, I wanted

someone in the church to marry again,

-and he wanted the same.

-Yeah.

- Oh, you did?

- Yeah.

Since the arrest and my pregnancy,

I feel like I have changed spiritually.

I have really looked at, like,

what's important in my priorities.

I want someone, like, to go

to church with when we go to church.

Like, I don't wanna be

in a relationship where, like,

I'm taking my kids alone and stuff.

And I just really wanted that, like--

And you have usually

the same morals and values, I feel like.

Or-- Do we always follow them? No.

But we're pretty aligned

with that in that way.

Being pregnant and recommitting

and trying to go back to church

is not the typical Mormon thing to do,

and most wouldn't.

And I feel like they'd be

a little bit more shameful,

and I do have those feelings,

anxiety, fear of going back in

and being judged.

However, I still love our faith

and really wanna make an effort to go.

So, we are just gonna try.

I think that when you're pregnant

and you're bringing a life into the world,

you need to be really

considering marriage.

It's really not that different, ya know?

Dakota moving in

with my parents being here

did not go well.

But I'm hoping our baby shower

goes better.

I've been through the struggle,

yeah, I'm more than what you see ♪

Took a while to get it,

so I'm holding on to success ♪

I don't do no drama, baby,

go ahead with that mess ♪

You a boss and you walking like it ♪

- Hi!

- Hello!

Look at you.

You look so cute, pregnant mama.

- Look at this baby.

- Oh, my gosh,

-it's getting so big.

-You're still small though.

-Small?

-What the heck? I feel like you're lucky.

-I get huge.

-I know. And I'm almost, like, there.

I know. So, wait, so are we looking

for stuff for the baby shower?

-Yes. I wanna show you, like, a picture.

-Yeah, what's the vibe?

I'm having my baby shower at this venue

called the White Shanty.

It is Mormon-owned.

And they pretty much have, like,

every Mormon event you can think of.

I just really want

this baby shower to be perfect.

And I just really need

my support system back,

so I just hope all my friends

come and show up for me.

We wanna find, like, some eucalyptus?

-Is that what it is? And baby's breath?

-Yeah, and then baby's breath. Yeah.

-Okay.

-So, we can kinda look.

And I was looking at these.

I'm like, "Dang, I wanna get some plants."

I'd probably k*ll it on accident though.

So, I am kinda nervous

about my baby shower.

-Why?

-Just to see everyone.

-I'm just, like, scared.

-Yeah.

Honestly, there's just

no other way of saying it.

I don't blame you,

but I feel like when everything came out,

I felt bad for you.

Everyone was sh1tting on you,

and I was like, "I would hate

to be in her position, even if I f'd up,

and everyone's like, 'F you, Taylor.'"

I'm like, I couldn't just, like,

I couldn't even, like, imagine

where your mental health was at.

If anything, it made me, like,

want to come towards you more.

Like, "This girl, like, needs a friend."

After the scandal

and then, obviously the arrest,

the moms in MomTok all,

for sure, judged me.

They didn't know

the background of the story,

so they were like,

"We don't want, like, Taylor."

Those who love

and support you will be there.

-Yeah.

-And I guess that can kinda give you

an idea of, like,

who cares and who doesn't.

- We don't have time for fake friends.

- I know.

I do feel like you've done

a great job at taking accountability

for, like, things

from the past and, like,

-what you've done.

-Yeah.

But I do think that you take

all of the accountability,

and you act like it's all you.

And then, like, Dakota looks like

this angel sent from Heaven,

who's, like, this perfect person

when he's not.

Like, I'm not gonna sugarcoat it.

I worry because of, like,

what I've seen him say to you.

Me and Mikayla went to this event.

Taylor shows up,

and then her ex walked in.

And immediately,

Taylor was, like, stressed.

Dakota was freaking out.

He basically was saying like,

"F you. You're an f'ing sl*t."

And Taylor was sitting

there, like, shaking.

She doesn't deserve that.

I just think that he's not treated you

the way you should be treated.

♪♪

When we were at that event,

and he was texting you,

I was looking over your shoulder.

I was reading your whole conversation.

-Oh, my gosh.

-I could see that you were, like,

shutting down

and you were so anxious.

-Then I was like, "What's going on?"

-Yeah.

I just think that he's not treated you

the way you should be treated.

But I also feel like things

have gotten so much better.

Like, what has changed?

Like, he's being less toxic or--

Both of us are being less toxic.

How so?

Just, like, with the addiction?

-Or just, like, in the relationship?

-Everything.

Taylor definitely hasn't confided in me

as much since she got pregnant.

I don't really hear much

about their relationship anymore,

which I knew, eventually, would happen.

That's what usually does happen

in those toxic relationships.

Two weeks before she told me

she was pregnant,

she called me basically saying,

"I wanna get out of this relationship.

I don't know how to get out."

Like, she was basically

asking for my help.

And then two weeks later,

she's telling us she's pregnant.

I always think about you.

That's why I always check in.

'Cause I'm, like, I want you

to know you can, like, talk to me.

-I know.

-I think that's why I always, like,

defend you 'cause I've been there.

-Yeah.

-'Cause I'm telling you,

some of the other girls

don't and they won't.

And I feel like I really gave him

the benefit of the doubt.

But I haven't seen any progress,

maybe that's why.

Like, I only know what I saw in the past,

and that, like, pisses me off.

-Sure. There's been a lot, I will say.

-Yes.

I can honestly say there's

been so much progress.

Dakota is obviously very insecure.

Because people who are confident

in themselves and their relationship,

they don't act like that.

But it's still no excuse for his behavior.

I'm just trying

to be a good friend to Taylor.

And I see those red flags

and it scares me.

I don't trust him.

I don't think he's good for Taylor.

I don't think that they

should be together, period.

Do you think I should just

do this on my own?

Like, you rather be--

have you be happy without this person

than miserable with him

just for the baby.

I don't like him.

I see Mayci

as, like, this protective friend.

She's always defending me in situations.

I do appreciate that she's blunt

and always been honest.

I know she wants the best for me.

But at the same time, it's really hard

to hear and accept as well.

Alright, well, I wanna look

at the pots they have.

Yeah, let's look at the pots.

Take your foot up off the brake ♪

Make no mistake ♪

We're wide awake ♪

Second guessing every move ♪

What's up?

Oh-h*-h*! Whitney's here.

-Whitney's here! The party has started!

-Yay!

I'm so excited!

Um, 'kay, fun.

You guys already have everything out.

-Yeah. Guess who did it?

-Lexi.

Is she the new favorite?

I don't know about new.

Being a member of the Church

of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints--

I know, it's a whole mouthful.

My family's very conservative.

My family's family is very conservative.

-How's your boyfriend?

-Good.

Mom, how do you feel

that he's not Mormon?

He's a great kid.

Why do I feel like if I were to date

a non-Mormon boy in high school,

Mom would've absolutely

said, "No way"?

Well, now you know I wouldn't've cared.

Of course, it's gonna weigh

into my decision

whether or not I'm gonna

promote a vibrator.

I'm just trying to figure out

is this a gray area

or is this an absolute

"do not promote this"?

So, Mom and Lexi, I'm curious

to know your point of view on this too.

I got a really juicy

brand deal for a vibrator.

Okay.

Just to promote it on my social media.

Why would you do that?

Well, one, the money's really good.

And two, and two, I feel like I can go

about it where it's, like, empowering.

- Hm.

- You don't think it's, like, empowering?

No.

Why?

Do you feel like that, like,

matches your platform though?

'Cause you're all like,

"Oh, my God, kids, homemaking.

Vibrator!"

I mean, yeah.

Like, let's empower each other.

But I don't feel like it does match.

I just think a lot of that

is private, personal.

But I also-- I wanted to 'cause

I, like, I didn't want it to be shunned.

It's like, "If you need this tool

to enjoy intimacy with your partner more,

like, there shouldn't

be shame around it."

Do you feel like there is

with the church in sex toys?

Probably, yeah.

I think it's a personal thing

between you and your partner.

What if you were single?

I'm not sure how I feel about that.

You think that it should be a no-no.

I think when you're seeking pleasure,

it can just get outta hand.

I'm gonna put these in.

I feel like we were

so involved in the church.

Growing up, even in young women's

or girls' camp

or young women's activities,

like, whenever we would talk

about the law of chastity or sex,

like, it was always,

"No, no, no, no, no."

There's this verse I remember,

where it talks about how sex

was comparable to m*rder.

And so, that's what's going in my mind

as a young woman.

I didn't even have the sex talk

before I got married to Connor,

and I was a virgin.

♪♪

I had to figure it out on my own.

Whitney. Whitney.

My wedding night should've come

from a horror movie.

That was a horrible, horrible night.

It was a conversation that was never had,

so we both just went in this blindly.

Okay, maybe not a horror movie.

A comedy.

I don't know if it's a Utah thing, but no.

Like, when I, like,

would watch these movies

and they'd, like, hold the banana

and, like, put the condom on the banana,

I'm like, "Never at my school."

I remember at your shower

that your friends threw you--

Yeah. The bachelorette party.

I mean, ya had to know some--

You guys had p*nis cookies.

I was kind of like,

"What is goin' on?"

I-I had just had another baby.

She was a toddler. Cut me some slack.

You should've taught me

how you had the baby.

Obviously, you figured it out.

I wish that I had conversations

with my mom about topics such as this.

And it's hard because, you know,

my mom was raised in the church,

and her mom didn't talk to her about it.

We just never did talk about it.

So, I just took that as, "Oh, this is

just something you don't talk about."

It was, "This is sh-shameful, horrible.

Don't ever do this.

Don't even think about it.

If you do, you're a horrible person."

Like, that's literally what I believed.

If I could go back in time,

I would check that off

of my parenting list

to make sure that I asked

if there was anything that you

wanted to know that you didn't know.

Oh, I love you, Mom.

The sex is great now,

if you were wondering.

And you know what made it better?

Toys, so.

I wish my mom had talked to me about it,

but I'm so happy that she's listening now.

Sex can be viewed in religion

as, like, disgusting.

But times are changing.

This is a new generation comin' in.

With MomTok, we're here,

we're embracing our sexuality.

It's empowering, and it's exciting,

and it's fun.

I think I'm gonna do it.

I think I'm gonna promote the vibrator.

You hate it.

You hate it so much.

Well, there's lots of things

I don't agree with, but that's okay.

The cycle ends here.

I'm going to have this conversation

because it needs to be had.

Maybe I'll send you one.

It's okay.

You don't need to send me one.

I really want to ♪

Hey, you ♪

Na, na, na, na, na, na ♪

Be careful. Watch your step.

This slushy.

Hey, guys. Welcome to Oteo.

Um, we'll have you guys

sit right over here.

I'm doing well.

How are you guys?

-Good. Thank you.

-Good. Thank you so much.

- This is so cute.

- This is cool.

Oh, yeah, this is awesome.

- Thank you so much.

- You're welcome.

Thank you.

So, who's going to the baby shower?

I invited my family, your family,

and then I think mostly all

of my close mom friends are coming.

Like, they'll be there.

- Is it all the MomTok girls and stuff?

- Yeah. MomTok.

How is, um, Mayci?

Didn't you go to the flower shop with her?

It was good. We kinda just caught up.

She asked about how we were doing--

Oh, is she still talkin' sh*t?

Like always?

-No.

-Yeah.

That's all she does.

-She doesn't like me.

-It's not that she doesn't like you.

It's, like, she's been the one friend

that I've opened up to about things.

-So, she's, of course, just defends me.

-No, no, no, no. She's petty.

I'm sorry.

Like, like, there's a difference.

Like, I've opened up to my friends too.

Taylor, she doesn't like

a-any picture you post of us.

Like, she's so petty,

she won't even like the picture.

Who does that?

Sorry, that's weird.

I don't know where she seems like

she has this right to, like--

'Cause I confide in her.

She's the only person you confide in?

Mm-hm.

I don't confide in a lotta people.

But I haven't even tried.

I am scared of friendships right now.

Like, just like, kinda like I'm scared

of, like, um, marriage and everything.

Like, just from everything that's gone on,

like, I am scared to have close friends.

I really am because the close friends

that I had the last five years

were not even really my friends

and were gone in the snap of a fingers.

Mayci was one of the first ones

to come and be my friend.

I have screwed up with MomTok twice now.

First, the scandal, and then my arrest.

So, I do feel on the outs, insecure,

and probably a little bit judged.

I don't know all of their intentions,

and I don't think you ever

really do know your friendships

until something happens,

and then you find out the hard way.

And I don't want there to be drama.

And so, I'm hoping that MomTok,

they will kinda give me another shot

and we can all have

a fresh start together.

♪♪

No more playing ♪

'Cause I'm running out of patience ♪

I'm running out of,

I'm running out of ♪

-Hi.

-Hi.

You wanna go play in the sand?

Ooh.

Whoa, this feels so weird.

Oh, look, he's like, "Mom, no."

You can do it, buddy.

- It's Himalayan salt

- Yeah.

so it's supposed to be really good

for your immune system.

So, it's like, any time my kids are sick

or if I'm sick, like, I'm like, uh,

-"We need to go to a salt cave."

-Yeah.

Can you eat it?

My kids do.

'Kay, wait, what are you

wearing to Taylor's baby shower?

I don't know if I'm gonna go to that.

Why?

I don't have

that kinda relationship with her.

We've cultivated this relationship online,

but we don't have one in real life.

And I don't even think she'd care.

The whole time I've known her,

it's always been give, give, give,

and it's never been reciprocated.

And I'm just kind of like,

"Well, then why am I,

why am I still giving?

"Why am I still supporting?

Why am I still entertaining

"this relationship when there's

- nothing even there?"

- Gotcha.

It's like, I know it's gonna be fun,

but it's like, I-I don't

wanna do that anymore.

I wanna lead MomTok back in the direction

that it was originally founded on.

I am not supporting this fake friendship

that we don't have anymore.

I just feel like I have to walk around

on eggshells

- Yeah. Yeah.

- every time I'm around her

because of this audience

that she has on social media.

It's like, I'm so intimidated by it.

I'm like, "Oh, my God. Like, look what

she did to her best friends."

-Yeah. Yeah.

-"Look how she f*cked them over."

When this whole MomTok

swinger drama happened,

it was immediate crash.

We were all in this massive group chat

and then people were just

fighting back and forth.

And friendships were torn apart

because of what Taylor was saying.

And it sucks that she even allowed

something like that to happen.

Online, it looks like

we're all the bestest of friends.

Ooh.

It's like, but we're not.

All she cares about is herself.

I genuinely feel that way.

This is definitely typical Whitney.

She will have problems

with somebody, have tension,

and she just wants to avoid it

rather than to talk to them.

Every time we're together,

she has to create a TikTok

and it has to make sure that, like,

she's shown as the queen bee

and we're all, like, these girls

who kiss her a*s and lick her pee.

And I'm like, I'm not--

I'm done with that facade.

I don't wanna entertain it anymore.

I'm out.

I'm not really sure why Whitney

would consider not going to this.

Especially just because one of

the purposes of our group in MomTok

is that we come together

and we support each other

through all the things that

we're going through in life.

She was getting a divorce.

She was having an affair.

She got arrested.

-I'm done with that.

-Yeah.

I feel like all of us in MomTok,

it's really important that

we all stay strong and united.

And it makes me honestly really worried

that Whitney might not show up.

I don't trust her.

I don't feel safe around her.

I don't want anything to do with her.

And I think that's fine.

Queen bee ♪

Royalty ♪

Off with your head if you step to me ♪

Stone cold ♪

Breaking bones ♪

It's a rough road to the throne ♪

C'est la vie, don't mess

with the queen bee ♪

Actually, I have an idea.

What if-- I'm gonna put

all the greenery on here

and then we'll just

keep this one the green.

Hey, Taylor, what did

you wanna do with the welcome sign?

- Do you want it on the table?

- They have, uh, easels?

And yeah, we have easels

we could put it on.

What do you think would look best?

- I think if you used an easel.

- Let's do that.

-Yes.

-Yes.

I'm kind of nervous.

With the arrest,

I don't know necessarily

if the girls did judge

or have any opinions about it.

I came back to the church,

try to get my life together,

and just kinda redeem myself.

And I'm, like, finally getting there.

We're, we're moving.

We're progressing.

But I feel like I have distanced myself

from, you know, all of my friends.

I don't know who's

gonna show up and who's not.

But I do want them there for me.

I don't wanna do this alone.

I'm stressed.

I'm like-- Anxiety attack.

♪♪

♪♪

I know secrets don't make friends ♪

I don't care if I offend ♪

You know rules are meant to bend ♪

I'ma keep 'em 'til the end ♪

Rumors spread like fire ♪

What a good liar ♪

Can't stay immune ♪

I know secrets don't make friends ♪

I don't care if I offend ♪

You know rules are meant to bend ♪

I'ma keep 'em 'til the end ♪

I know secrets don't make friends ♪

I don't care if I offend ♪

-Hi. The b*tches are here.

-Hi! Look at the baby mama!

Despite my issues with Dakota,

I know it's important to be there

to show up for Taylor for her baby shower.

She has gone through

so much in the last year,

and I wanna make sure

she feels loved and supported.

I think when Taylor sees us

group of girls rallying around her,

she'll be more excited and happy

to come back to MomTok,

so we can all start making videos again

and be a united front.

You look stunning!

I am here to fully support her

on her journey

and whatever her journey looks like.

Even if she's taken a step back lately,

which I totally understand and respect,

I have supported Taylor through all

of the ups and downs throughout MomTok,

and this is no different.

Look at your cute, little belly.

With the ribbon,

you are gonna cut

how big you think Taylor is,

and then, whoever's the closest

to guessing how big she is

- Oh, that's fun!

- wins a prize.

I just feel like

he's gonna be such a sweet dad.

He is.

He's gonna be really cute.

- What was that?

- What? Nothing.

I think he'll be a great dad.

The baby daddy part is where

I think we worry a little bit.

There's just, like, stuff

from the past that I think still bugs me.

When we were at that event,

he was saying like, "F you."

Like, I think he said like,

"You're an f'ing wh*re," or something.

Okay, do you guys have your ribbons?

- I would love to check for you guys.

- Do a check.

- Awkward.

- I know.

Well, that was close.

I'm gonna put my hand on your belly

-'cause I love it.

-Sure.

-Do you guys know where Whitney is?

-Oh, is Whitney not here yet?

I don't know.

Fashionably late.

Is she coming?

Last night, I was with her.

And she's not coming.

Wait, what?

-Yeah.

-Oh.

-Did she tell her she's not coming?

-No.

And I told her maybe she should,

but she said that Taylor's

probably not even gonna notice.

I am shocked that Whitney is not coming

to the baby shower.

At the same time, I know

she's not a big fan of Taylor right now,

so it doesn't surprise me,

but she should at least send her a text.

I feel like this is sending

a message to Taylor

that she does not wanna be friends

and she does not care about Taylor.

-Did she say why?

-I don't wanna go into, like,

too much detail,

but she just says that

she just doesn't wanna

be involved with Taylor.

Can I get a pic with all of you girls?

- Yes!

- Is everyone here?

- Um, I think so.

- Whitney. Where's Whitney?

- Oh yeah, Whitney's not here.

- Oh. I don't know if she's coming.

What do you mean?

Did she say she wasn't coming?

Um, I thi-- I guess she told Layla

last night she's couldn't come.

- I honestly think--

- You know why. Why isn't she coming?

Wait, Whitney's not coming?

- You're, like, the worst liar ever.

- I know.

Just be honest.

-She just says that

-Layla knows. I don't know.

you guys don't have a friendship,

so she felt like she

didn't need to come today

-because you guys don't have a friendship.

-What?

Oh, well, that's news to me.

I don't wanna be the one

to have to bring it up.

-sh**t the messenger.

-I was just hoping you wouldn't notice,

-so I wouldn't have to say anything.

-That she's not here?

The tension between Whitney and Taylor

is very tangible with them at all times.

It's like you're either Team Taylor

or you are Team Whitney.

I feel like they both love

the spotlight in different ways,

but they both have

this very alpha female energy.

And that seems to be the bigger issue.

♪♪

Hello?

-Hey, Whitney.

- Yeah.

This is Liann, Tay's mom.

How's it goin'?

-Good. What's up?

-Good.

I was just callin'

'cause I noticed you weren't here.

Your mom called Whitney.

Oh, my gosh.

Shut up.

Yeah.

Taylor's mom called Whitney.

I would die if my mom did that.

What is goin' on?

Um, I don't know.

I think that's more of a conversation

between me and Taylor.

♪♪

There's a clear division in MomTok.

Sinners versus saints.

Zac's parents are very conservative.

They don't smoke.

They don't drink.

I thought it was a graduation party.

You guys are all boring.

We're hosting Luca's baby blessing.

It's, like, super sacred and spiritual.

We just don't want any bad energy.

I didn't know we were uninvited.

That was to hurt you.

It's kind of like the Mean Girls

in a sense because it's like

them three against the world.

Demi, I have a gift for you though.

- Oh!

- Shut up!

This was completely intimate

and off the table.

It is very hypocritical

because she wants

to create this safe space with MomTok.

I just think it's below the belt.

Oh, my God!

Betrayal ♪

I helped make you ♪

You turned your back on me ♪

Betrayal ♪

Betrayal ♪

It don't phase you ♪

What you've done to me ♪

Betrayal ♪