01x08 - Chapter Eight: Happy Endings

[bunniefuu]

[dramatic Western-style theme music]

[moody accordion plays]

- [moody piano arpeggio]

- [bees buzzing]

[Robyn] Ringer reckoned thou shalt

learn about the birds and the bees

[horse snorts]

- before it hits you in the face.

- [horse neighs]

- [whips cracks]

- [Shirley Bassey] If you go away ♪

- On a summer day ♪

- [birds twittering]

Then you might as well

take the sun away ♪

[clock ticking]

All the birds that flew

in a summer sky ♪

When our love was new

and our hearts were high ♪

When the day was young

and the night was long ♪

And the moon stood still

for the nightbird's song ♪

[toilet flushing]

If you go away

If you go away ♪

If you go away ♪

Well, that root was

f*ck' disappointing.

Yeah? I'll see you next Tuesday.

- Oh, yeah, righto.

- But if you stay, I'll make you a day ♪

Like no day has been

or will be again ♪

We'll sail the sun ♪

We'll ride in the rain ♪

We'll talk to the trees ♪

And worship the wind ♪

But if you go, I'll understand ♪

Leave me just enough love ♪

To hold in my hand ♪

If you go away ♪

- [door opens]

- If you go away ♪

- [door closes]

- If you go away ♪

[dramatic orchestral flourish]

[song ends]

[Steve] Good boy. That's it, come on.

- Come on.

- [Karen] Have a look at him, Steve.

- He's ready to go.

- Don't be a b*stard.

Come on, it's time.

Don't f*ck around.

- [Karen] Look at that.

- [Steve] Come on, for f*ck's sake.

[Karen] There we go.

Look at the presentation on that.

- Get in the mood, mate, come on.

- [horse grunts]

- What are ya doin'?

- [horse whinnies]

Alright, alright, alright,

f*ck off then.

Mornin'.

f*ck's sake.

What are ya doin' here?

I thought we was going riding?

No.

- But you said.

- No, I'm workin' here.

Do you do you know what

you just cost me?

The mare was pickin' up on your bad mood.

That's why she didn't cooperate.

- Yeah, and whose fault's that?

- Yours.

For sinkin' a shitload of piss yesterday.

[muttering, to himself] See, this is why

I don't want f*ck' kids.

Always wantin' sh*t.

Nice one.

[Robyn grunts]

[Steve] Hey, hey!

[spits]

[Karen] She's not interested.

Chuck her in the float.

[fast-paced intriguing music]

Where's my pipe?

[Cheryl grunts quizzically]

Thought you were going riding?

Nuh.

[beer trickling on floor]

- [music ends]

- What are you doing?

Um

Is that mari-ju-ana?

You can't do that under my roof.

[inhaling]

[exhales]

Not your roof.

I'm done here.

[Cheryl] Wait.

Somebody called for you.

What? Who?

A young man.

[beep!]

[Gidge, on recording]

Robyn, it's, um it's Gidge.

Listen, things have

well, they've gotten bad

and I don't know what to do.

So

I think this is the end of the road.

I just wanted to say I'm sorry.

Goodbye.

And

it was really nice

getting to know you.

- [beep!]

- [breathing rapidly]

How do I call him back?

You can't.

["My Pal Alcohol" by Slim Dusty plays]

I've been drinkin' since I was four ♪

Ain't had enough and I still want more ♪

Fill 'em up again

Place the glasses in a row ♪

I've been in the horrors

and started to shake ♪

But good hard liquor is what I take ♪

- And my pal alcohol ♪

- [muttering angrily]

I love you so ♪

When I'm far away from home ♪

If there's no pub, I'll brew my own ♪

Out of vegetable

or anything that grows ♪

f*ck!

I'll drink it till my eyes bulge out ♪

Then I'll scream and rave and shout ♪

'Cause my pal alcohol ♪

- I love you so ♪

- [gas cooktop clicking]

- [groaning] Bloody hell!

- [gas cooktop continues clicking]

- [loud clattering, bottles clanking]

- [grunts]

[caravan crunches]

f*ck'! Gidge!

- [metal squealing]

- Hey!

What the f*ck do you think you're doing?

Where where are you going?

Don't leave me here, mate. It smells.

- And I need a lighter!

- [car door opens]

[engine starts up]

- [tyres screeching]

- [metal crunching]

[engine switches off,

handbrake cranks]

[Robert, tapping on window] Hello?

You need these.

[d*ck] Hey, Gidge.

Morning, d*ck.

Looks like you're taking care

of business, ay?

- [Gidge] Yeah.

- Ahh. I mean, the poor bugger.

Have you got anything

that can cut a lock?

Well, bolt cutters?

What do you need them for?

Have you got any?

[d*ck] Nah. I used to have a pair.

Leant 'em to someone. Never come back.

sh*t.

Yeah, oh well, I've got a hacksaw?

- Oh, yeah, that'll do.

- [d*ck] Yeah?

[Cheryl] Where does he live?

- Adelaide.

- What's his address?

- I dunno.

- Maybe you should just wait here.

- [door opens]

- He might call again?

[Karen] Come on.

Come on.

Alright! Family meetin'.

- What for?

- [Steve] I'm turning over a new leaf.

See, Robyn here

Hmm?

Robyn here's just given me a spray

that's got me thinkin'.

It's time I stepped up

and became a father.

So that's what I'm gonna do.

Steve.

- [slurping]

- Whatever. I gotta find Gidge.

- Who's Gidge?

- My boyfriend.

- You got a boyfriend?

- Robyn needs our help to find him.

- Don't you, Robyn?

- Cheryl, I told you last night.

You can't just get rid of her.

Oh, darling, I'm only trying to help.

Steve!

- Hmm?

- [car doors closing]

Oh, yeah, and, um

Karen's pregnant too.

[Cheryl] And?

[doorbell ringing]

What?

Yeah. So that makes three.

Only three, ay?

Well, actually, there might be

a few more down the highway.

- [doorbell continues]

- [Karen laughs]

They can come and live

with us as well.

You philandering f*ck!

- You what?

- Don't think you're gonna get a cent,

you gold-digging trollop!

[Karen] That's rich comin' from you.

Everyone knows you only married him

for his old man's money.

- How dare you!

- Ow! Ow!

[both grunting]

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!

Girls, girls, girls!

- Relax!

- [Tracey] Hello, Robyn.

- [Karen] Get off me!

- G'day, everyone.

I'm Detective Burke.

This is Detective Wills.

- Oh, you took your f*ck' time.

- [Tracey] You're coming with us.

- No. I gotta go find Gidge.

- [Tracey] Nah, come on.

- Hey. Hey, hey, hey

- Calm down, Robyn.

- Don't touch me!

- Get your hands off my bloody daughter!

Nah, come on.

You must be the father, then.

- [Robyn struggles]

- Yeah.

[Mick] Well, you can come too, mate.

[Tracey] She needs a guardian.

No bloody way.

I got responsibilities here.

I got a stud to look after.

Got a couple of kids on the way.

- Come on, mate.

- Hey, hey!

Get ya bloody hands off me, mate!

- [can thuds on floor]

- [Mick] Hmm?

[Steve grunts, struggles]

[groans]

[Steve groaning]

It's alright, sweetheart.

I got ya.

[handcuffs clicking]

Yeah, and she did all that for me.

I did it for my pop.

Why? You only had three weeks

left on your sentence.

Don't say nothin' until we see a lawyer.

[clicks tongue]

You gotta find Gidge.

Hey, look, forget about this Gidge.

- He's in trouble.

- What kind of trouble?

I dunno.

Probably got something to do with that

dead woman in his father's caravan.

- [tyres screech]

- [Mick gags]

What dead woman?

Gidge's dad k*lled a woman,

and then we found the body.

Now he's in trouble.

And he's at home.

Bob k*lled a woman?

Yes. That woman he was with.

- His wife?

- [Robyn] No, that's not his wife.

[stammering] I don't believe it.

Bob wouldn't do that.

Psst! Psst!

Well, I seen it.

- Mick, turn around.

- What?

- Do it!

- [huffs]

[tyres screeching]

[soft, pensive music]

[sighs]

[flies buzzing]

Ohhh!

[chuckles]

- [sawing]

- [Robert, tapping at window] Ha-ha! Gidge!

Gidge, it was the lamp!

She electrocuted herself!

I didn't k*ll her.

Isn't that great news?

You can let me out now!

Why are you wearing a suit?

Oh, she deserves a decent burial, son.

- [d*ck] You leavin' that caravan here?

- [Gidge] Uh, yeah.

You know, lost the, uh, lost the key,

silly me.

Oh, just forward on that hacksaw.

You'll f*ck the blade.

- Right.

- Lucky for you, I brought in the big g*ns.

- Oh, no, that's--

- Just need some power.

- [Gidge] d*ck, you don't have to--

- [d*ck] No.

[Gidge] I appreciate it

but really you don't

Oh, Jesus! There's a smell. Oh!

Yeah, the dog.

Blood and bone. Someone's doin'

a bit of gardening, is what that is.

d*ck, I really--

Hey, Rob! Rob, what are you--

[flies buzzing]

Look, here's your, um

Here's your

- Keep it.

- Yep.

See what you've done now?

We're f*cked!

No, you're f*cked! [huffs]

[taps window] Hey, Gidge.

The money! Her money. The money.

You can have it all!

I-I don't care, you can have it,

just let me out!

[banging] Let me out, will ya?!

Listen.

I'm going now.

If there's anything else you got to say,

now's the time.

[sighs] I really need a lighter.

- Jesus.

- [Robert] Hey, hey! Here. Here.

- [slow, curious music]

- [flies buzzing]

[chain rattles]

[saw clangs on ground]

[electricity buzzing]

[engine starts up]

[Mick] This place smells ripe.

Living next door to a sewerage plant

would almost have me off me lunch.

Bet the houses are cheap, though.

[sighing] Yes, Mick.

[lawnmower whirring]

I'll go talk to him, see what he knows.

[car door closes]

- [Tracey] Hey.

- [fast-paced music]

Not against the law to mow your lawn.

Didn't say it was.

[Mick] Be nice to rekindle

a father-daughter relationship, ay?

Yeah.

[Robert] I love you, son!

Gidge!

I love ya!

[exasperated scream]

[fast-paced music continues]

[Tracey] Mick, can you get over here?

[Mick groans]

Stay here.

- [car door closes]

- Hey.

Hey, what are you doin'?

[handcuffs jangling]

You're pretty good at that.

[fast-paced music continues]

[Robert] Yeah, good boy.

Come on, son.

- [bangs window]

- Oi. Hey.

- [window smashes, lawnmower whirrs]

- [Steve] Hey! Hey!

[Robert] Yeah, come on, Gidge,

that's a good boy.

Come on, boy.

No, don't do it!

Mate, this is your last chance.

Alright? It's your last chance.

[tapping at window]

[Robert] Oi!

Oi, get back here!

Oh, no! Oh, bloody hell.

- Evil!

- [Robyn laughs]

[stammers] How did you

What's that smell?

- Oh, that woman's in there.

- Still?

[chuckling] Yeah, we were gonna

bury her in that hole.

You're an idiot.

- [fast-paced music continues]

- [Mick] What are ya doin', ya drongo!

- Are you f*ck' crazy?

- Mowin' me lawn!

- Turn the mower off, mate!

- [lawnmower whirrs]

- What?

- Turn it off!

Can't hear ya!

[engine stops]

You see, I shouldn't have to do that.

Oi. Robyn.

- Get back in the car.

- Who's this?

Oi! Get your hands off my son,

you Jezebel!

Oi!

What did you call my daughter?

I called her a bloody Jezebel, you moron!

Now get off my f*ck' lawn, idiot!

Come out here and say it, mate, hey?

Hey? Who do ya think you are?

[both arguing at once]

If you won't come out here,

I'm comin' in there, mate!

You better be ready!

I'm comin' in! Nobody speaks

to my daughter like that!

- [g*n fires]

- [Steve yelps]

[whimpers]

[Robert] Oh, sh*t. Sorry.

[dogs barking]

[Tracey] Who shot that?

He's got a g*n?

Oh, Jesus, me knees.

Agh Christ, that smell!

[Steve whimpering]

This is no good, this is not good.

Ohhh

Dad?

[Robert] Yes, son?

Cops are here.

You got a woman's body in there?

[Robert] No!

[Mick] Your neighbour said

he's seen her, mate.

Ah, sorry, Rob.

They forced it outta me.

[Robert] Oh, f*ck' d*ck!

Come out, Bob. Leave that g*n inside.

[Robert] No, thank you.

I like it in here.

I can't stand the sight of blood,

so you're gonna have to

have a look at it for me, mate.

Alright, just breathe deep.

- Breathe in and out. That's it.

- Just be careful.

Bob! Come out, we need to talk.

I need a lighter!

[Mick] Who's got a lighter?

Yep, sure. Two ticks, I got one here.

Hang on.

There you go.

[Mick] Alright, Bob.

I'm gonna pop this

through your little hole here.

You light that durry

and then you come on out.

[loads g*n]

[fast-paced brass music]

- [gas hissing]

- [lighter flicking]

[tense music builds]

[expl*si*n booms]

[groaning] Oh, Jesus

[Robert] Ah, oh, ooh, ow!

- [slow, whimsical music]

- Agh! Ow, ow, ow, ow! It hurts!

It hurts! It hurts! Aghh!

I'm on fire!

[Robert shrieks]

sh*t, sh*t, sh*t!

Get the f*ck'!

[Robert thuds on ground]

[unzips]

[unzips]

- Better get in and help.

- [Steve groans]

You're right.

[trickling]

[trickling]

[door creaking]

[Robyn] My pop Ringer reckoned

thou shalt not steal.

'Cause if you do,

you're gonna get locked up.

He had a lot of sayings, that old fella.

But he's dead now.

The only lesson I learned

from all of this?

If you're not gonna stick around,

don't stick it in.

- You're born alone and you die alone.

- Mate, I told ya yesterday you can't park there

[Robyn] And I'm sick of being alone.

[Robyn] So I'm gonna take a new road.

- [car door closes]

- With this fella.

I don't know where we're gonna go,

but thou gotta plan the escape first.

["The Biggest Disappointment"

by Slim Dusty plays]

♪ They had my future

wrapped up in a parcel ♪

♪ And no one even thought of asking me ♪

♪ The day I turned 15

I caught the mail train ♪

♪ To find what else

might be in life for me ♪

♪ I rode on trucks and trains

and lived on nothin' ♪

♪ Served me right for wanting to be free ♪

♪ Ah, well, that's the way

society looked at it ♪

♪ But it didn't seem

to be that way to me ♪

♪ And the biggest disappointment

in the family was me ♪

♪ The only twisted branch

upon our good old family tree ♪

I just couldn't be the person ♪

♪ They expected me to be ♪

♪ And the biggest disappointment

in the world was me ♪

♪ A lot more dinner times

than there were dinners ♪

♪ I learned a lot

that hurt me at the time ♪

♪ Then this quiet country boy

went home a different man ♪

♪ With a memory of distance on my mind ♪

♪ But I always spoke too loud ♪

♪ And laughed too often ♪

♪ Maybe drank too many glasses down ♪

♪ And perhaps my clothes

were older than I realised ♪

♪ A relief to all concerned ♪

♪ When I left town ♪

♪ And the biggest disappointment

in the family was me ♪

♪ The only twisted branch

upon our good old family tree ♪

♪ I just couldn't be the person ♪

♪ They expected me to be ♪

♪ And the biggest disappointment

in the world was me. ♪

[song ends]

["Ngurrapanya Tjayla"

by Isaac Yamma plays]

[song ends]

♪