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02x05 - Art & Science

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "SurrealEstate". Aired: July 16, 2021.*
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Real estate agent Luke Roman and his team specialize in clearing and closing haunted houses.

02x05 - Art & Science

Post by bunniefuu »

Previously on SurrealEstate.

- What's today?

- I am taking my first couple to look at houses.

- [EXCITED LAUGHTER]

- So, if Luke wears this thing,

- he'll have his tingle back?

- You're somebody special.

You have no idea.

Oh, you got another call

from that Rochelle something.

Is there a story there?

I just wanted to let you

know that I'm gonna need

a few more days away from the office.

- House! Let me out!

- [HOUSE] We've bonded, Susan.

[SCREAMING]

[PENSIVE SCORE]

[PHONE BUZZES]

[SIGHS] What a mess.

[PHONE CONTINUES BUZZING]

Danny, I'm working.

Yes, I fired them.

The movers you sent me were hopeless.

I wouldn't trust them

with my coffee table

much less my canvases.

God God, everything's

fighting me here.

It's-it's one thing after another.

Things are going missing.

It's paint and brushes,

packing materials.

I'm misplacing things and

[DRAMATIC BOOM]

Danny, I need to call you back.

[CLICK PHONE OFF]

[SIGHS]

[THUNDER RUMBLES IN DISTANCE]

- [GASPS]

- [SERIES THEME PLAYS]

[MAN SCREAMING]

- [PENSIVE SCORE]

- [ELEVATOR ARRIVING CHIME]

No, no, no, no. I can't do four.

I'm meeting Tandworth at four.

He wants to see the Lewis place, again.

Wish he'd just buy the place.

He'd spend less time there.

Can you do two?

I'm meeting Daneel and Holster.

Okay, how about six? Can you do six?

Well, geez, Zooey, what can you do?

Uh, I can tie a knot in a

cherry stem with my tongue

and I can do 4:30 but the

client has a hard out at five.

Well, put it in the calendar.

Here, have a muffin.

Wait, whoa, whoa, whoa! We

gotta talk about Nelgrave.

Nelgrave, that's where

I'm going now. Right?

- Right?

- Yes.

Yeah, okay, but there's

some hotshot art dealer

from New York who knows

you, or knows of you.

- Danny Portefoy?

- Yeah.

He hired us to help

one of his artists pack,

sell and move fast. She

sounds super stressed out

and I'm quoting here:

"Things are getting lost

and moving around by itself."

- Sounds like a Spoon Bender.

- Or a Hummel Chucker.

- [ELEVATOR ARRIVING CHIME]

- So no big rush!

I don't know! August is

over there to check it out.

- Whoa.

- August

is their first contact with the agency?

Yeah. You were booked.

Zooey was booked. They're in a hurry.

All right, I need to

get over there right now.

- What is the client's name?

- Aurora Nelgrave.

- [PHIL SIGHS]

- Yeah.

There's one more thing. I got an email

from Susan this morning. I

reached out to her earlier

after the no-show last night,

just asking for proof of life.

- She is fine.

- Thank God.

But she is taking a

leave of absence. I know.

I have been pushing her to

find the work-life balance

since she started and

she called me on it.

But I'm glad that she's

taking it seriously.

- [ELEVATOR ARRIVING CHIME]

- Really glad.

Really.

[BROODING SCORE]

Glad.

Really.

- [GENTLE SCORE]

- [SEAGULLS SQUAWKING]

- Morning.

- Morning.

How's everything?

Just finishing up.

How's the client?

High strung. Impatient.

Very much the artist.

Any sign of our Mug Juggler?

Inconclusive.

There's definitely some

interesting energy in the house,

but this close to the ocean

we always get a lot of interference.

There's a software patch

to defeat it, but

- it's not inexpensive.

- [LUKE SIGHS]

The budget's kind of tight this quarter.

It seems crucial to keep

our technology up to date,

given the loss of our

more analog systems.

And that would be me.

You can just say it, Augie.

You lost your fastball, Luke.

We need to develop your slider.

[SCORE FADES OUT]

On a completely unrelated

note, I need a day.

- A day?

- I know the timing is not

optimal.

I wouldn't ask if it were not important.

[SEAGULLS SQUAWKING]

Yeah, sure. Of course.

Can I give you a hand?

Yeah. Thanks.

Miss Nelgrave?

- Aurora?

- Yeah.

- Aurora, I'm Luke Roman.

- I'm your real estate agent.

I take it the big guy with

the weird glasses is yours?

Yeah, he's ours.

He quoted Plutarch and

asked about cold spots.

It's what he does.

Look, I told Danny I

could do this on my own.

I really don't like letting

the work out of my sight,

especially with all

the weirdness going on.

That's why your art dealer reached out.

Weirdness is kinda something

- [GENTLE SCORE]

- we do.

You've worked with Danny before?

Seven or eight years ago

there was a certain gallery

in Connecticut where the statues

weren't as static as

they might have been.

- Oh, you're not kidding.

- No.

Okay. Whatever.

Uh, I need to sell this

place and get to New York.

Well, maybe you could start by,

uh, describing the weirdness?

Well, at first it was just annoying.

Then things got a little dark.

Whoa.

That's a hell of a thing.

Time for what?

[EERIE SCORE]

[MOTORCYCLE APPROACHING]

August Ripley.

Rochelle Decker.

[SCORE FADES OUT]

I was surprised to hear from you.

You have been ignoring

my messages for weeks.

I've been rather busy.

- And here you are.

- [GENTLE SCORE]

Why now?

Curiosity. Nostalgia.

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]

This place has changed.

Mmm. ASDRA's now the

most modern and prolific

defense and technology

development agency in North America.

And yet you look exactly the same.

Ha.

I heard about Darla.

I'm so sorry.

We had everything but time.

I wanted to reach out, but, um

maybe if we had parted on better terms?

It was a complicated time.

Do you remember what you called me

when you cleared out your

desk and stormed out that day?

[LAUGHS] Oh, dear.

"A willing grease girl

for a corrupt w*r machine."

- I'm sorry.

- Oh, don't apologize.

I almost had it printed

on my business cards.

[CHUCKLES]

Do you ever wonder

what if you stayed?

What more you could have seen and done?

Perhaps I've seen and

done more than you think.

More than Project Erebuster?

[INTRIGUING SCORE]

That was a mistake.

An arrogant young man

shaking his fist at the darkness.

You took an algorithm

that was designed to

retrieve information

and you modified it

to gather data from

You can say it.

The other side.

Everyone thought you were

nuts. I thought you were nuts.

It was foolish.

It's back, Augie.

And it is asking for you.

[SCORE FADES OUT]

Do you remember when we were gonna

solve tomorrow's problems

without kissing the a*s

of some VC jerk whose life goal

it was to be a 5% stakeholder

in the air that we breathe

and the water that we drink?

Yes, we the purists, the idealists,

searching for new and bigger rocks

to throw at our enemies.

Grow up, Augie.

Do you know what we're working on now?

Climate change.

Micro physiology to

stop the next pandemic.

Technology that uses infrared light

to extract choice minerals from bedrock

without mining or fracking.

Quantum computers that

can answer questions

that we're not even smart enough to ask.

All of which

just happen to have military

applications as well.

For every plowshare, a sword.

Oh, all these years later

and the boy scout uniform still fits.

[LAUGHS] God, I've missed you, Shell.

[LAUGHS] Come on.

[SECURE DOOR BEEPING]

[INTRIGUING SCORE]

I believe you two know each other.

Three weeks ago, our IT people noticed

a bunch of hits on

your old ASDRAnet email.

They tracked the IP

address to your old machine,

which we had in storage, and it

It was looking for you.

This is extraordinary.

May I?

[DRAMATIC SCORE]

- [KEYS CLACKING]

- [BUZZER]

- [KLAXON]

- sh*t! What did you do?

I logged in.

- [BEEPING]

- Oh, no, no, no!

It's deleting all of its

data and core programming!

And appears to be hacking

through the ASDRA servers.

My God, six point eight

billion dollars' worth of data.

- Most of it's irreplaceable!

- I hope you have backups.

The cloud servers are the backup!

- Oh, dear.

- I don't understand.

This is a response to the

administrator's password

that we programmed into it.

Then you were right.

It is asking for me.

It wants the password I

buried in its original code

to make sure it's really me.

A root password? Do you remember it?

Let's see. So many years ago.

Was it, uh, one, two, three

Augie.

I need access to all

of Erebuster's data.

Everything it knows.

Oh-h*. No. No, no, no.

That is completely out of the question.

[DRAMATIC SCORE]

[RAPID CLICKING]

[ALARM]

sh*t!

Fine!

- I want your word.

- You got it.

- Scout's honor?

- Oh, for God's sakes, just go!

[ALARM CONTINUES]

[KEYBOARD CLACKING]

[EQUIPMENT POWERING DOWN AND UP AGAIN]

[MACHINERY WHIRRING]

[GENTLE SCORE]

[COMPUTER BEEPS]

It started right after I

put the place up for sale.

[GENTLE SCORE]

It was like

Oh! This is ridiculous.

Yeah?

It's like I hurt its feelings.

It's not ridiculous at all.

Every house is a

living, breathing thing.

Some more than others.

I was just a kid when I got here.

An art school dropout;

Just got divorced; Got sober.

It must have been hard.

Not compared to what I was leaving.

Something here resonated, spoke to you.

Almost immediately.

The brush in my hand

had a sense of purpose

I'd never felt.

I don't know if you

could call it confidence,

but it was peace.

I truly became an artist here.

It's like I could fly.

It's always hard to move on.

Sounds like you got a lot

of exciting things ahead.

I haven't painted

seriously anyplace but here.

- What if I can't?

- Yes, you can.

Just because you're used to

doing things a certain way,

doesn't mean you can't

move on from that,

do the same thing just as well.

Only differently.

Does it?

I guess we'll find out.

Okay, call those movers.

Let's blow this pop stand.

This is everything we have

on the Nelgrave property?

- Skinny, huh?

- I don't understand.

That property's at least

a hundred years old.

There's still some ten pounds

of footnotes to pore over.

That's just what I could

turn up in a half hour.

Can you put this on

the top of your pile?

Top of my pile?

What about Pruitt? And Denning?

Those are normies. Zooey's got those.

Clock is running on this.

There is something in that

house with a weird sense of humor

and I think it could do a lot of damage.

To the art?

And to the artist. Look.

Yikes.

"It's time?" What's time? Time for what?

Dig up those ten pounds of

footnotes and you tell me.

Sheesh.

- [ELEVATOR ARRIVING CHIME]

- [ZOOEY LAUGHING]

No, I am not submitting that offer.

Because it's 40% below

asking, Mister Kerr.

No! He'll be offended. He'll be pissed.

People are submitting offers

ten percent above asking

just to get in that neighborhood.

If I submit that offer,

he'll think I'm a lightweight

and you're an idiot and he'll be

right about at least one of us.

[ELEVATOR CALL DING]

I'd be happy to have

Miss Ireland call you back

at her earliest convenience.

She is away, though. Lucky

her, huh? Okay. Bye-bye.

- Ow.

- [RAPID DINGS]

[PENSIVE SCORE]

- Zooey, did you just

- From Susan?

Yeah. What did you say to her?

- Nothing.

- It's her entire database,

every detail from every listing.

[DINGING CONTINUES]

What is her deal?

[SEAGULLS SQUAWKING]

[EERIE SCORE]

[ZIPPING, OBJECTS CLATTERING

LIGHTLY ON CERAMIC]

- [SIGH]

- [PILLS RATTLING]

[DRAMATIC BOOM]

[SCREAM]

- [SEAGULLS SQUAWKING]

- [SOFT FOOTSTEPS]

[INTRIGUING SCORE]

[AURORA] I don't like this feeling.

What feeling is that?

This damsel in distress feeling.

You are nobody's damsel.

I told you I came here

after I left my husband.

Son of a b*tch was never physical.

Just petty,

vindictive, small.

He made me feel small.

That first night that

I came to this house,

I promised myself I was

never going to let anyone

make me feel that way.

The next day I couldn't stop painting.

Became my own little

monument to my existence.

Something bigger than me to

prove I couldn't be erased.

And now my sanctuary has turned on me.

Change is tough.

But, uh, change brings possibility.

Eventually,

you stand on one foot, and you squint,

starts to look a lot like destiny.

But you know that,

or you wouldn't have

moved back to this place.

Looks like that's the last of it.

A few days, your art will be on display

in one of the most prestigious

galleries in New York.

As far as change goes? Pft.

That's pretty cool.

Yeah.

- [TRAFFIC SOUNDS, HONKING]

- [RHYTHMIC SCORE]

You know, setting a root password

is against the rules.

- Five demerits!

- No time in the game room.

You know what really chaps my a*s

is that you didn't trust me.

I don't recall us

ever gazing into each

other's eyes and

murmuring sweet root

passwords to one another.

[ROCHELLE SIGHS]

- [KEYBOARD CLACKING]

- [TWO SHORT BUZZES]

What does it mean,

"interface not detected?"

It's

seen things.

And it wants to tell me

personally.

[TAPPING]

No.

Let's see. One K.

- Mm.

- [AUGUST LAUGHS]

Yeah.

[CONTENTED SIGH] It's been a while

since you weren't the

smartest person in the room.

- Rather refreshing.

- Mm.

[TENDER SCORE]

[CONTENTED SIGH]

A direct download.

It's our only option

for a lossless transfer.

Yeah, but

we don't know what

it's going to do to you.

You have a family; Four daughters.

They are grown. And they never call.

It's no worse than a vigorous VR game.

An immersive form of show and tell.

Besides,

perhaps the data will suggest

a military application,

a metaphysical machine

g*n, an existential bazooka.

You are such an as*h*le.

[SCORE FADES OUT]

[TENSE SCORE]

- What's happening?

- [DRAMATIC BOOM]

- Finish her!

- [GASPS]

Aurora?

[DRAMATIC SCORE]

[UNINTELLIGIBLE WHISPERS]

- [LUKE GRUNTS]

- [METAL RATTLING]

It's time!

[THUD]

- [METAL CLATTERING]

- [THUDS]

- [AURORA GASPS]

- [LUKE GASPS]

- [THUD]

- Finish her!

[AURORA SCREAMS]

[DRAMATIC SCORE]

You all right?

What the hell was that?

I don't know what but I know when.

[DRAMATIC SCORE RESUMES]

[OTHERWORLDLY SCREECH]

- [GENTLE SCORE]

- It wants something from me.

It wants me to paint.

And it would prefer if you do it

you know

It's the house. It has to be.

I don't think so.

That painting.

Oh.

That hotel puppies and ponies painting?

That came with the house.

I kept it for its camp value.

I packed it once;

Came back.

[PHIL] Painter is Thomas Warner.

Lived in the house with

his wife from 1860 to 1890.

He was a an artist, to a point.

Unappreciated in his time.

Well, he was rejected

from several art colleges

including the National Academy.

Get this: He spent his

father's inheritance

bribing critics to

give him good reviews.

- A bitter, entitled artist.

- Sounds like our guy.

Well, I don't know.

Everything I've found says

Thomas died rich, fat and happy

of natural causes.

I don't know that he

had the self-awareness

to know how lame he really was.

This is my house.

And I will not be pushed around

- in my house.

- [TURNS WATER OFF]

- [SOFT GASP]

- [DRAMATIC BOOM]

[DRAMATIC CRESCENDO]

- [DRAMATIC BOOM]

- [DISTANT SCREAM]

Aurora?

- [HIGH-PITCHED RINGING]

- Aurora?

Where are you?

[HIGH-PITCHED RINGING CONTINUES]

[DRAMATIC SCORE RESUMES]

Aurora?

Hey.

You in there?

[WATER RUNNING]

[HIGH-PITCHED RINGING CONTINUES]

[DRAMATIC SCORE]

[DRAMATIC BOOM]

Aurora?

[ETHEREAL VOCALIZING]

Aurora, did you do this?

- Aurora.

- [DRAMATIC BOOM]

[GROWLING]

Thomas Warner?

No!!

Hey.

We haven't met.

Oh!

- [SCORE FADES OUT]

- [AURORA SNIFFLES]

[SCREECH FADES UP THEN OUT]

[SIGH]

- [KEYBOARD CLACKING]

- [COMPUTER BEEPING]

[ROCHELLE SIGHS]

[PENSIVE SCORE]

Augie, are you?

[RELIEVED SIGH]

We don't know what

this is gonna be like.

All this information.

Isn't it exciting?

- [KEYBOARD CLACKING]

- [BEEPS]

[DRAMATIC BOOM]

[GENTLE SCORE CONTINUES]

- [DRAMATIC RUMBLING]

- [ZAPPING, ELECTRICAL ARCING]

[AUGUST VOCALIZES BRIEFLY]

[UNINTELLIGIBLE MALE SPEAKING]

- [DRAMATIC BOOMS]

- [CRACKLING]

[HORSE NEIGHING]

[MEN YELLING]

Not quite yet.

[SPORTS ANNOUNCER TALKING EXCITEDLY]

[DRAMATIC BOOMS]

[MAN 1 SPEAKING UNINTELLIGIBLY]

[MAN 2 SPEAKING UNINTELLIGIBLY]

- [RUMBLING]

- [MAN 3] Thirty seconds.

[MUFFLED expl*si*n]

[MACHINERY SPINNING UP]

August?

August, can you hear me?

[GENTLE SCORE]

Heavens to Betsy.

[MACHINERY HUMMING]

August?

[GENTLE SCORE]

[SIGH]

August, what did you see?

[SIGH] Wow.

August, what did you see.

I saw

nothing.

I saw

everything.

I saw life

and what comes after

from the cold

logical perspective of a machine

that can never live nor die.

You're scaring me.

I

saw Orion

echoing with spirits

crying through eternity.

Atoms

warping with the weight of souls

striving to be reborn.

All parts of the celestial

ellipses,

the astral ouroboros.

In the end,

Erebuster showed me

there are no answers,

only deeper, more

wonderful questions.

That the best we can do is

stop worrying about death

and focus on life, on

on living.

So that's it?

That's the profound truth from beyond

YOLO.

It's gonna be hard to make

a cruise m*ssile out of that.

[ELEVATOR ARRIVING CHIME]

[AURORA SIGHS]

[DRAMATIC SCORE]

You've embraced me and protected me

changed me in all the ways

that needed to be changed.

Now what do you want?

[SIGHS]

"Finish Her." "Now."

"Please."

Every step of the way

this house has been

trying to communicate with us.

With you.

It needs something from you.

That is the leverage, that's power.

Oh, yeah. Power.

I think you need to let it in.

Again.

Says the guy who doesn't

have to be repossessed.

I get these things.

I can't hear them

anymore, I can't see them,

but I know them. And

something in this house

is hurting and the only

way that I could talk to it

is through you.

[RAIN PATTERING]

[SCORE FADES OUT]

[SOFT THUD]

You think you can just

light up a room and leave.

Something like that.

I'm pretty sure this is

going to come back to haunt me

on my next performance review.

[CHUCKLES]

Come back to ASDRA, August.

Come back to me.

We'll have so much fun.

You'll have virtually

unlimited resources.

Virtue has little to do

with what happens here.

So you're rejecting me?

Just the job.

For now.

- [GENTLE SCORE]

- I happened to notice that

all-night diner is still up the road.

Where once we loved

and laughed and danced

and withheld our root

passwords from one another.

Is it still the same?

Nothing's ever the same, Augie.

Everything changes.

Some things

get better.

[MOTORCYCLE ENGINE ROARS TO LIFE]

[GENTLE SURF]

[SIGHS] This is ridiculous.

I think it's more than the house.

I think it's something in the house

responding to your art,

your drawing, your painting.

Let's use that to connect.

[SELF-CONSCIOUS SIGH]

I don't know what to draw.

Whatever comes to you.

[SIGHS]

- [RAPID TAPPING]

- [ENERGETIC SCORE]

[DRAMATIC WHOOSH]

- [DRAMATIC BOOM]

- [WOMAN WAILING]

Aurora?

[WHISPERED VOICE] You owe me.

Keep going.

[WHISPERED VOICE] I gave you everything!

You owe me!

- Gave you everything.

- [WHISPERED VOICE] You owe

- You owe me!

- Keep going, keep going.

- [WHISPERED VOICE] I matter.

- [AURORA INAUDIBLE]

- Not Thomas.

- [INAUDIBLE]

I am not small!

I will not be erased! I was here!

[GASPS] I mattered!

[WHISPERED VOICE] I was here.

Whoever you are, you tell

her and she'll tell me.

- [WHISPERED VOICE] Not Thomas.

- [AURORA UNINTELLIGIBLE]

- Aurora, look at me!

- Not Thomas, never Thomas

Aurora!

[SOUNDS CRESCENDO, DISSIPATE]

[GENTLE SCORE]

[GENTLE SIGHING]

Aurora, are you okay?

You're back.

Not Thom I'm not Thomas.

I am not small.

I was here. I matter.

The sketches.

I know that face.

Her name was Scarlett Warner,

she was Thomas Warner's wife.

According to our records,

all she left behind

was a birth certificate,

death certificate

Mm. Marriage license.

A monument to her existence.

Something bigger than her to

prove she couldn't be erased.

I've been drawing that

face since I moved in here.

It's the first thing that came to me.

She must've latched on that first night,

when you swore you

wouldn't let the world

make you feel small or invisible.

She's been working through me

the whole time I've lived here.

But she said there's

something unfinished,

something that I have

to do before I can leave.

[GENTLE SIGH]

[TENDER SCORE]

Thomas had a thing for

horsies and hunting dogs.

But he

was no more an artist

than I am a synchronized swimmer.

He knew it and it bugged him.

She was so much better than him.

More talented. More inspired.

[DRAMATIC SCORE]

She had to hide.

Finish her.

That's what she wanted.

Finish her portrait.

Use the gift she gave

you and then give it back.

So, I finish her painting?

I prove that she lived, she mattered.

She moves on.

What about me?

What if her gift was the only

thing that made me special?

It's always the question, isn't it?

How much of ourselves

do we owe to others?

Where do they leave off and we begin?

I could lose everything.

Or you could know that every

experience you ever had

your marriage, your courage,

your house and Scarlett

all combined to make you who you are.

One-of-a-kind.

True original.

[UPLIFTING SCORE]

[FEMALES VOCALIZING]

[UPLIFTING SCORE, VOCALIZING CONTINUE]

[GENTLE SCORE]

[PAPER RUSTLING]

[SIGH]

[SUSAN] Dear Luke.

My time at the Roman

Agency has been interesting.

And fulfilling.

[WHIRRING]

Change is seldom easy.

[TRUCK DOOR CLOSING]

[KNOCKING]

But there comes a time

when change is necessary.

I find that time is now.

Yeah, I can hold.

Thank the team for their

assistance and friendship.

And thank you for the opportunity.

Thanks.

Please consider this my resignation

from the Roman Agency.

Effective immediately.

Susan Ireland.

[WHOOSH]

[CREEPY SCORE]

- [ETHEREAL MUSIC]

- [BUZZING]

[INCOMING TEXT CHIMES]

[DRAMATIC BOOM]

[SINISTER SCORE]

[CLOSING THEME]