01x05 - We Him

[bunniefuu]

- Representation matters.

- When I created Love & Hip-Hop,

we only did it because we wanted
to be very authentic in who we are.

We wanted to make sure
we represented Black love

in the way
that we know how to represent it.

- We have a playbook
to the NBA, to the NFL.

You know exactly how to get there.
- Yeah.

- But the playbook to STEM degrees
and being-- becoming an astronaut,

we have to change that narrative.

- You're so much more
interesting than the stereotype

and yet, when we try
to present that to the real world,

we're told no one wants to see that.

- In 2016, I was unhappy with my job.

I felt like they checked a box to hire me

and then put me in a box--
- Woo!

Let's raise a glass.

All right, y'all,
we gon' get into the juicy stuff.

- You like rosé?
- I'm a rosé girl.

That's my favorite, favorite kinda wine.

- Oh, really?
- Yeah!

- Like, in the summertime?

- In the summertime, it's great.

You know, you just chill out, you feel--

I feel like a, like a Carrie Bradshaw
on a budget, you know?

Which is always good.

- I like rosé

because it's one of those wines
that you can drink all day long.

- Yes.

- And when it's really hot,
it's not that difficult to drink.

- Oh, this is so good.
- Yeah.

- I love this. It's nice and crisp.
- Isn't that?

And this is made by an African American
wine, uh, sommelier, Andre Mack.

Have you ever heard that name, Andre Mack?

- No. Shout-out to you, Andre Mack.
- Absolutely.

- I've met some really
intriguin' people in my lifetime,

some really intriguin' Black people,
but I've never met a astronaut.

So, should I call you a Blastronaut?

- I think Afronaut.

That's a little more appropriate.
- Afronaut?

- Yeah, yeah.

- Was there a Afronaut you could call
or that you had as a mentor?

- Actually, I applied because of--

It was a friend of mine,
he was a knucklehead. He got in.

I said, "If he can get in, I can get in."

- It's very rare that I ever
get the opportunity

to speak with another Black woman
who is an editor-in-chief.

- Right.
- And I'm just curious,

what has it been like for you at Andscape?

'Cause at least at Andscape,

you are not the only one
who looks like you in the room.

- Right.
- What is that like?

'Cause I'm sure it's a juxtaposition.

- Inside ESPN, we founded
a small media company

that was The Undefeated,

and that was race and sports, right?
- Yes.

- And then we became Andscape,

so we could just do
the Black POV on everything.

And it's just as great
as you think it would be.

- I love that!

- There's not a long list of people
that could say they've done this, right?

- But I think the-the bigger part
of-of that flight for me was,

you know, we had lost people
on the Columbia accident.

I went to the home of David Brown
to console them that night.

When I talked to his father,
his father said to me,

"The biggest tragedy would be
if we don't continue to fly in space

to honor their legacy."

So I was continuing to honor
their legacy by flying in space,

by not giving up, by keeping going.

- Wait! You were truly a punk rocker?
- I-I was obsessed.

- Do they know this about you?
- No.

- Have you kept this undercover? Do they--
- Of course, I've kept this undercover.

Are you kidding?
- Yes. I got, like--

- That's like the last way
that they will take your Black card.

They're like, "What? Punk rock?"
- "Punk rock?" Exactly! That's amazing.

- No Sex Pistols without R&B.

And there was no hip-hop.

But they're, they're
all directly connected,

right?
- 100%.

- And that feeling
of "F you" to authority.

If Black people didn't invent that,
like, what did we invent?

- I hope you feel seen.

And your secret is safe with me.
- I do.

Yay!
- I love that.

- Dinner is served.

Let's go and have dinner.

All right.
- Yay.

- And also get drunk.

- Got a whole bottle in that hand.

- Ay, ay, ay! Here we go!

I like her.

- This first course is a little gem salad.

And on this little gem salad,
we have a green goddess dressing

in honor of the ladies that are here,

who are, who are goddesses amongst us.
We'll take it.

- And I have a little shaved Asiago cheese

and little breadcrumbs
inside there for a little crunch.

And pickled red onions.
Nice.

Ooh.
- Jump in. Enjoy.

- Y'all just gonna ignore the fact that
we have an empty table setting here.

Clearly, whoever this is,
is on CP time.

- Absolutely.

- They're too late. I might dig in.

- Yes.

- Why is it called little gem?
Yeah.

It's called
little gem because, actually, it's, um,

a miniature romaine lettuce.

And so, it's a lot sweeter,

and it's more intense,

and it has a nice crunch to it.

So, that's why it's called the little gem.

Okay.
- I like that.

Yeah.
It could be, like, "Little Romaine,"

but I guess it sounds like
a rapper name, right?

It does, yeah!
Right?

- Little Romaine.
- Little Romaine!

- By the end of dinner,

we all need to decide
what our rapper name is gon' be.

- Ooh-mm.
- Okay?

- Little Idris.

- Yeah. I'm-I'm Little Idris.

You're Little Idris.
- I got that.

- I'm not mad at that.

- Oh, Queen Pheebs, that'll be mine.

- Yeah.
- Ooh, I like that.

- Queen Pheebs. I'm ready.

- You know, you are the astronaut.

You better be good.
Yeah, right?

- It has to have fly in it.

- Little-Little Afronaut.

- Oh! I love that!

- I'm not mad at that.

- Please tell me you, actually, say that.

- We do.
- You really do?

- We actually-- We had
a Zoom call with Victor Glover

who was in space for six months.

First time a Black man
was in space for six months.

And all the Black astronauts
got together and called him,

and we said,
"Hey, there go the Afronauts."

- Wow.

- And that's where that name came up.
- He said that?

- We did.

- So, how many of you are there?
How many Afronauts are there?

- Sixteen, 16 or 17.

- Sixteen, 17 now?
- Yeah, yeah.

- But wait,
whoever was up there for six months,

what were they doing?

- So, Victor was doing--
- Runnin' from the law.

- Running from the law.

- Out running from the law.

But what were they eatin' up there?

- No, we had, like, uh,
rehydrated, uh, vegetables,

but when I went up,
there was, um, a three-star Michelin chef

'cause we had
a French astronaut on our mission.

Oh, really?

- We had duck confit, um,
chocolate chocolate cake.

Yeah.
- It was all in cans.

- Did you have any though?
- Oh, yeah.

Was it good?
- It was good. It was good.

- So the French get better food in space.

- That's not right.
I'm sorry, I'm protesting.

- So, you think that-- Go figure.

They're the French.
I mean, it does make perfect sense

that they would have
the best food in space.

- Meanwhile, you're eatin' Malt-O-Meals.

- Rehydrated turkey.

- Could you bring
hot sauce to space or not?

- We definitely have hot sauce.

You have hot sauce in space?

- Because, in space,
your taste buds get desensitized,

so you want spicier foods.

- Okay, we only have
one Black Afronaut at the table,

but we do have a lot of firsts and onlys.

And I read Shonda Rhimes's
book, uh, Year of Yes,

and she talks about this concept
of being first, only, and different.

- Right.
- She calls it FOD.

And I remember
when I read that, I was like,

"Oh, my God, I identify.
I identify. I feel that."

- How many times have you heard,
"Black astronaut?"

Just like that.
- Every time.

- Every time?
Really?

- Especially young Black kids that say,
"There're no Black astronauts!"

We have a playbook to the NBA, to the NFL.

You know exactly how to get there.
- Yeah, yeah.

- But the playbook to STEM degrees
and being-- becoming an astronaut,

we have to change that narrative

so that people can see themselves
and believe themselves

they can do that same thing.

- Yeah, I mean,
I think that's sort of the biggest thing

is trying to be
authentic to yourself

in a world where
people might not be

open or willing to make space for you.

We move in white spaces,

so you have to be aware of white people.

White people move in white spaces,

and they choose whether or not
they want to be aware of people of color.

And most don't make that active choice.

They sort of passively choose.

If it's like, "Well, I work with Rhonda,

and so I guess
I gotta care about Rhonda's kids."

- Why she gotta be named Rhonda, though?

- Yeah.

- That's the thing. That's the sad thing.
Her real name isn't Rhonda, it's Keisha.

But this person just been
callin' her Rhonda for three years.

- Right, because they told her
Keisha wouldn't get promoted.

Wow.

- Well, Raina, I wanna thank you

because I was in a place in 2016

where I was s-so, like,
uh, unhappy with my job.

I felt, uh, like they
checked a box to hire me

and then put me in a box.

- Yep. Woo!
And, and

I've told you, you guys,
like, saved my career.

It was then called The Undefeated,
now it's Andscape.

But it was a-a place where,

you know, I was ab-able
to write about race and culture,

and it was okay.

- It takes Black platforms
and Black leadership

to, like, see people like you
who are being underutilized,

underestimated, and squandered

in spaces where their talent
isn't recognized or nurtured,

and bringin' them to a space
where they can flourish and fly.

And it's amazing to see
what you've done since then.

- But I actually believe
that Black is beautiful.

Like, I-- And I believe that we're
just an extraordinary people

who have an extraordinary history.

And "squandered"
is the word that I love, right?

I don't want us to squander
this amazing opportunity we have.

I just want the world to be available
for all those amazing, brilliant kids.

And they're the ones that like,
"I'ma be brave.

I'ma do stand up in Staten Island."

Like, do you know what I mean?

Like, it just-- It's just-- So, it's--
The world is a oyster for all of us.

- Yeah.

- I think I secretly wanted
to be a performer,

but I was too scared to admit it.

I was from Cleveland, Ohio.

Like, I didn't know what the path was.

And so, I was like, "I'll just, you know,
write movies and, like, win Oscars."

Like, I thought that was,
like, the easy option.

It was just to win some Oscars.

Um... and I took
a stand-up class at 23 at Carolines

and immediately fell in love with it.

And I was like, "This is what
my life is supposed to be like."

And I was working at this film company,

and three months after I took
the stand-up class, I got laid off.

And I was like, "This is a sign."

So, this was 2008.

- Ah!
So, you do the math.

- Everybody got laid off in 2008.

- Everybody got laid off
in 2008, for sure.

- All got laid off.
I got a severance package.

And I, you know, was
a dumb 24-year-old.

I was like,
"This is so much money."

So I was, like, legit
buyin' furniture from West Elm.

Like-- I was like, "I'm rich now."

- That's funny.
- I was like, "I have made it."

And then, like,
the credit card bills were comin' in,

and I was like,
"I have not made it."

"What have I done?"

And I just, like, worked, like, temp jobs,
and I did stand-up at night.

I'd go to Staten Island.

And then, 15 years later,
I'm here sittin' next to the Afronaut!

Look at me! Look at me!

- Ay!

- This is a three-hour braised short rib.

And when I say three hours,
I mean three hours.

So, basically, you can eat it
with a spoon, and, um--

- Well, well, well.
Oh!

Look who it is!

- Welcome.

Welcome.
Thanks for havin' me.

Let me get comfortable, though,

since it's some food
involved it seems like.

There you go.
- Great food.

- All right.
You smell good.

- Thank you.

- So, I was just describin' the food.

What you have in front of you
is a three-hour braised short rib

with chive-whipped mashed potatoes

and Swiss chard
and buttermilk fried onions.

Jump in. Let's all catch up.

- You know, it wouldn't be
a Black dinner party

if there wasn't one person on CP time.

- I'm-- I totally apologize.

- No, you just legitimized
our, our table. Appreciate it.

- I'm mad I had to be
the one legitimizing it.

- Have you guys seen
his weather reports on Instagram?

Nah.
- They're so good.

- I have a weather show
called The Drip Report

where I do the weekend weather.

And it's, basically, about fashion

and what you should be wearin'
and not wearin' due to the weather.

- How did you start that?

- There was a hurricane.
I think Hurricane Irma.

And Chrissy was in Miami,

and she was, like--
she wasn't-- didn't wanna leave,

she was gonna thug it out.

And then that forced me to fly to Miami

and have to thug it out
in the hurricane with her.

- That's love.
That is love.

- And one of my colleagues called me like,

"You might as well, uh,
give 'em a-a-- the weather report

while you down there."

And I did that, and it went viral.

And so many people called me like,

"Yo, what you did was kinda dope.

Maybe you should continue in that vein."

And we on our sixth season...
- Amazing.

- ...about to be on our
seventh season, um, so.

- When you started doin' music,
did you ever think

that that was somethin'
that you would find yourself on television

doin' the weather report?

- Nah, the weather
was probably the furthest thing,

the furthest thing from-from my mind.

But, um, I'm blessed for every--
any direction I'ma get to go in

that's positive and it helps me grow.

- I had a career day when I was
in the seventh grade

that was life changing.

A guy from the Golden State Warriors
come and speak to my class,

and asked me, specifically--

It was, like, almost, like,
God told him to ask me,

like, "What do you wanna
do when you grow up?"

And I'm like,
"sh**t, I wanna play for y'all."

He's like, "Well, what if you can't?"

I'm like, "I don't know."

He said, "Well, if you can combine
what you love most in life

"with what you do best in school,

you can find a job
that you're happy with every day."

- Right.

- But imagine if every kid
in the seventh grade

got that road map of options,

and how to get to college,
or how to do a trade or whatever.

- Right.
Whatever it is.

Like, somethin' that could
open their mind up to the possibilities.

- I taught a high school curr--
I created a high school curriculum,

which I did for, like, four years
in a Brooklyn high school.

And it's a eight-week program.
It's called Music Business 101.

Because where I'm from,

most of these kids
don't get a chance to go to college.

So, I wanted to show them that
this music industry is one of the places

where you can make a career
and become rich beyond your means

without having to have a college degree.

So, I break down a whole classroom
into a fully functioning record label,

and show them how to market
and promote artists or a record

from when they sign the artist
to when it comes out.

And then I call favors from my friends,

and they all come
from those departments

and speak to these kids
about what the details

and the responsibilities
of that department is.

And I never had one absent--
Like, a full attendance for all--

They really paid attention
to what's goin' on because it was music.

These kids look up to certain things

and there's certain people that speak,
they take that as gold to them.

- My restaurant was in The Fillmore, and--

- The one in San Francisco?
- San Fran--

- I've been to The Fillmore
projects a bunch of times.

- Yeah, you know what it's like.
I used to have

a couple of good friends out there.

- Yeah. Yeah.

So, we had this program
where we would have-- invite the kids

to come and cook at my restaurant
during the daytime.

And they would learn from me
over a eight-week period.

And we'd paid 'em
to learn to cook and do these dishes.

And the next day, my wife would
teach them the front of house.

I had to show them that these
are careers that are available to you.

I look like you,
I had the same upbringin' as you.

My-My accent's a little different.

But I grew up in, like,
in a council house in England.

It's a nice way of saying a project.

But that's what we did.

So, when you guys go out
and lead this country,

when Black people lead in this country,

remember it's not just this country,

it's all around the world
are lookin' at you.

To this day,
we still take the knee at soccer games

because of Black Lives Matter.

To this day.

And we bring it to everybody's attention

because we've had
our own problems over there.

- For the life of me, I haven't seen
Black people unite for one cause

and really fight like the way
they did for George Floyd.

And it was great,

but... it's still goin' on right now,
as we can see.

I mean, we can fight
for justice all we want.

We've been fightin' that... forever.
That's been our cry.

I mean, at what point are
we gonna change the narrative

and dive directly into what we need?

- But I think it's because
the problem is so pervasive,

it's so everywhere.

So, there's no general solution.

So, I think, a lotta times,

people wanna find
what's the easiest solution.

So, it'll be like, "Black History Month,
we'll just have a panel."

And so, if you look
at all those different ways

in which actual change can happen,
it feels too hard.

So, they fall back on, like,
what's the easiest solution.

And then that's why
it goes away in, like, a year

because it's, like, they feel like,
"I did that. Cross it off my list,"

not realizing it has to be every day--
- Check the box, yeah.

you have to be
thinking about these things,

about how you're making things more equal.

And most people,
quite frankly, don't wanna do the work.

I just feel like it kind of
a bittersweet conversation in a way

because you almost have to speak
about a lot of the progress that was made

in past tense.

Do you feel it as strongly
as you did three years ago

in-in the height of 2020?

- It makes me nervous because,
in 2020, it was clear.

In many ways,

this country treats Black people
in an inhumane way.

What was that, three years ago?

It means somethin' completely different.

Like, it's been weaponized against us.
- Yes.

- And the circumstances didn't change!

- I think the slogan was
the strongest part that we had

of that whole Black Lives Matter.

Once they made it into a business--

- Yeah.

- it turned to somethin' different.

But when it just was
Black Lives Matter, the slogan,

and people was believin'
in that Black Lives Matter,

it was a thing.

Yeah.

- But we not seein' nothin'--
- Somethin' tangible come out of it.

Thank you.
- Right.

Thank you.
- There was a movement to be monetized,

to someone getting paid.
- They monetized.

Okay, so, now what's next?
And where's that money going?

- If you got some money,
now show us somethin'.

Where's the-the safe places
for these kids to go to?

Where-Where are the courses
at to teach these kids how to,

to-to-to go up against police
in the-the right manner?

Like, where's all of that?

- We didn't have the right people

to, like, say,
"Okay, this is what we do with this.

This is how we help the community.
This-- Maybe put a board around it."

- We, like, get distracted when we--
and, and divi-- and divided

when we talk about Black Lives Matter,
the organization, and its failures.

I think it-- we have to divorce that
from Black Lives Matter, the sentiment,

that we all are responsible
for carrying forward

from every single
seat of power that we all sit in.

- I think a lotta times, like,
when we're looking for, like, a leader,

like, you put too much on one person.

Like, yes, I love Malcolm X and MLK,

but it's, like,
when that person goes away,

then all the energy goes away.

So, it has to be sort of a collective,
like you're doing what you're doing.

We're all doing what we're doing.

Like, I got into publishing in a way,
and now I have my own imprint.

Wait.

- Tiny Reparations Books!

- Tiny Reparations Books.

And so, my mission
is to publish Black authors.

And so, I think, I never want anyone
to feel like they won't have a shot.

- All right, so let's--

Can I get to Black Lives Matter
on our side, right?

So, Black Lives Matter,

we all... go hard for it
whenever it is white-on-Black crime,

whenever there's a officer
against a Black person.

Like, Black people go crazy, right?

And then we go back in our communities
and do Black-on-Black crimes.

So, I'm just trying to figure out,
how do we fix that?

- Yeah, I think how much of that winds up
being the system that exists

where communities
where you see higher rates of crime

are also communities that have had
higher rates of disinvestment.

They are those communities where
the public schools have been defunded.

Like, it's-it's--
There's a weird thing where, you know,

we talk about defunding the police

and people were like,
"How could you do that?"

And yet, no one seems to recognize
that, like, we defunded East New York,

we defunded Baltimore.

Like, we've defunded those schools.

We've defunded those communities,

where it's like,
"Okay, I know that I need health care.

"I need to take care of a baby,
and there are no jobs near me.

"Well, there are other things
I could do to make money.

And that might be hurtin' my neighbor."

- This issue is so systemic.

It was started by the system,
perpetuated by the culture.

And music plays a huge part in that.

What responsibility do rappers play
in ending Black-on-Black crime?

Because you hold, you hold the keys
to the culture in so many ways.

- Rapping's just paintin' the story
of everything that we all been through.

Now, can we be more responsible

besides the picture that we paintin'?

Yes, I do believe
we can be more responsible.

Can the influence
that we hold help our situations

and gettin' these young
Black kids to do better?

Yes, I do believe that.

I'm from the projects myself.

So, that picture that I paint,
it's usually not a pretty picture,

but the message that I speak
is about what I've been through

and how you can change yourself
because I've been at the bottom.

You know what I mean?

So, when you lookin' at me now,

I'm showin' every kid out there,
like, "This can happen for you."

- But I think that gets to this idea

that, like, as much as we can talk
about how much Black life matters,

we still live in a society
where white supremacy exists

in a world where capitalism matters more.

And I think until we recognize that, like,

it's not simply that it's, like,

"Okay, we want cops
to stop over-policin' Black people,"

but that there is
a whole system in place that exists

where it is financially easier
for things to stay the same

than it is to give us equity.

It's-It's like if I came
to you and I said,

"Man, I've never had a chain like that.
Gimme that chain. Can I have it?"

Would you truly just
be willing to give it up?

- No, not at all.

- Exactly, and I feel like
that's what that power is,

is, like, them saying, like,
"Oh, I see how it could make you happy,

"but I know what it cost me to get that,
and I know how I feel when I have it.

Why would I wanna lose that
so you could feel a little better?"

- That's a great analogy.
- Yes.

- And so, with that said,
"Can I have that chain?"

- No.

- Damn it, Jim.
That's Jim supremacy right now.

- That is Jim supremacy!

- Gon' be late,
not even gon' give us your chain.

- I know.

- For dessert, we have a lemon tart.

I call it the Rue Brother Restaurant
Lemon Tart.

This is something all great French chefs
learn to make at a very early age.

And I think it's just
a great way to end a meal.

- You were sharing
this story about the fact

that publishers were saying no to you,

that your book wouldn't sell,

but thank God you wrote that book

and that you made
The New York Times Best Sellers list

because it-it's because of your book

that I got a book deal,
and that my book became a bestseller.

And while I was writing my book,
I was reading yours.

So, I just want you to know
that you're an inspiration to me.

You are the proof of concept

in a marketplace that said
that your voice, that my voice,

that our voices don't matter.

And you proved them wrong.

So, I just wanna give you your flowers.

I wanna give you your flowers, boo.

- I think it's so interesting, like,
especially, like, in Hollywood,

a lotta times when I've pitched,
like, a lotta shows,

and in the past, it'd always be like,

I would just be talkin' about,
"Oh, it's about 30-somethings,

like, whatever, boppin' around,
blah, blah, blah."

And they're like,
"But what's the hook?"

And you're like,

"Do you mean,
'What's the f*cking devastation
of her life?' There is none."

- Right.
Oh, is that what

"What's the hook?" means?
She likes herself.

- I have never answered
that question right.

- Like, "What's the tragedy?" Like--

- Trauma is needed
all the time for Black people.

- It's like the hook is the same hook
as Lena Dunham's hook for Girls.

- Exactly. Or, you know,
Seinfeld or any number of shows

that are just about white people
just living, and falling in love,

trying to get a job, being broke.

Like, all that stuff happens
to people of color too.

Like, we're joyful, we're happy.

And so, I really think
that's been a huge thing.

And sort of just celebrate
the messiness of life

through, like, a Black woman's body

'cause that is, like, what I live.
- Right.

One of the most incredible
moments of representation

was when Nichelle Nichols, in the '60s,
was on Star Trek.

- Yeah.

- And she was not
a servant, a maid, a sl*ve.

She was the Chief Communications Officer
on the starship Enterprise.

And there were people that saw her,

one of them was Ronald McNair

who said,
"If there's a woman like that in space,

I wanna be an astronaut."

Got his degree from MIT in laser physics
and became an astronaut

because we were representing, in the '60s,
of what the future's gonna look like.

- Wow.
Wow.

- Representation matters.

- Even if you look back at The Cosby Show,

the stories that came out, that were like,

"Man, ain't no way they got a Black doctor
married to a Black lawyer.

Like, that's laughable, right?"

And I'm like,
"Whoa, whoa, whoa."

My mom always had me
around very successful Black people.

I saw that as somethin' to aspire to
and I had to be, you know what I mean?

- When I created Love & Hip-Hop,

we only did it because we wanted
to be very authentic in who we are.

And we fought every day

with those producers

so that we could be seen
in the way we needed to be seen.

Right.
- Yeah.

- When it came too much for us,

we left it when they was
about to give us everything

because we refused
to compromise our dignity

on how they wanted to carry the show on.

Now that goes back to what you said,

capitalism will wait for you
because Black exploitation,

which I wasn't willing to do

no matter how much money
they was willin' to give me and Chrissy.

So, we left that there on the table
for them to deal with.

- If you go around the world,
for people that don't know,

the perception people probably
have of you that haven't met you,

you a bad dude, man.

You got all kinda stuff goin' on.
- Pretty much.

- There's a reason why you ballin'.

- You're so layered.

You're not even the tip of what it means
to be this thing that people think that--

You know what I mean?
Like, you're so much more interesting

than the stereotype.

And yet, when we try
to present that to the real world,

we're told no one wants to see that.

- They understand how strong
we are as a Black people.

Like, our stories,

who we are, like, where we come from,

everything is worth money.

We need to start to control the narrative.

But we are so far in a digital era

that we don't need Hollywood
the way we needed it before.

- You had an incident
when you were working

at... The Daily Show with Jon Stewart.

I found it to be really eye-opening
'cause I thought of Jon Stewart one way--

- Dang, I don't wanna think--
Like, I like Jon Stewart.

Don't do this to me right here.

- But maybe you could just tell
the story, and then, and then--

- I mean, it's not--
Uh, you know, it's a weird thing

'cause it's, like,
I've talked about it a fair bit

and there's a part of me that,
at this point, I kinda feel like

that was one of the worst
professional moments of my career.

And I don't wanna be defined by that.

And it's a weird thing where
I feel like this business, oftentimes,

it's happy to kind of, like,
cash in on your trauma,

and for me, that moment follows me.

It doesn't follow him in the same way.

He gets to--
Really?

- Not at all.
No, he gets to profit.

He gets to, he gets to do well.

And I would rather be known
for all the things I did

after that.

Whether it was puttin' out
three stand-up albums,

gettin' one nominated for a Grammy.

- Ay!

- Once I left that situation
that was not a comfortable situation,

there was a freedom and a creativity
that I was able to tap into.

And so, people will come up to me,
and they'll talk to me,

and they'll, you know,
they'll talk to me about that.

And oftentimes,
they have their own experience

that they wanna share,

and I'm here for that
and I'm-I'm there to listen and--

- Freedom.

That was the big-- That's a big--

That's one of the biggest words
you said outta everything.

You found the freedom.

And that's what
we all lookin' for, is a freedom.

'Cause freedom comes with a price.

- It comes with a price and it doesn't--

It's, you know,
I feel like it's incremental.

I'm curious to hear
from your perspective as an Afronaut,

what is it like being
a Black man in space?

- On my first mission, I was the only
Black person in space at the time.

And it was a gr-- it was a very diverse
crew when I got to the space station.

It was the African American,
Asian American,

French, German,
the first female commander.

But when I got back from the space station

and we got in the shuttle,
we're about to come home,

I had an incident with my commander
and he said some stuff to me,

and I'm like, "I didn't do that.
What?" You know?

And he never apologized.

And I'm like,
"Oh, here we go again."

But when I flew the second time,
there was another brother on the mission.

First time two Black men were in space.

So, if anyone said anything,
I could just look at Bob and go.

The nod.
- "Yeah, here we, here we go."

- The nod translates in outer space.

It's like, "Man, you, you--"
You know what I mean?

'Cause think about it.

Like, sometimes Black people
don't tend to get along

just for the reason of "I'm him."

You know what I mean?

So, if you got somebody that was like,
"Nah, we here together. We him."

Exactly.

It's a beautiful thing.
- I like that. "We him."

- This is the way I like to end the day.
Mm-hm.

- Little Riesling.

This has a little slight sweetness to it.

Try it.

- This is a little different

from the, uh, grapes
that I usually, uh, indulge in.

- Oh, really?
How do you like to finish off a day?

- I like to smoke the grapes

as opposed to drink them.

But ain't nothin' wrong
with a little wine.

- No, not at all.

I'm part Jamaican,

and I didn't try smokin'
until I was 35 years old.

- Wow!
- Can you believe that?

- That is crazy.
- And then I tried it,

and then all I could talk
about while I was smokin'

was African elephants
and Indian elephants.

What I thought was
for, like, five minutes.

Apparently, I was talkin'
about it for three hours.

- It had you locked in.

- It had me completely locked in.

- Y'all need a fourth?

- Hey!

You know what?
Representation does matter.

- Hey! Salud!

And what better way to represent, right?

- Yeah.
- I love it!

This is the most amazing flex

of all the flexes.
Yeah.

- And what are all the zippers for?

- So, when you're flyin' in the jet,

you put your publications
for the different places you fly.

Oh, not for your wallet?

Yeah, and a little bit for your wallet.

Full disclosure: I flew to space,
but I've never played Bones before.

- And you from Virginia, right?

- I know, right? I know.

- Oh, geez.

It's your turn,
but tell us about the patches first.

- So, the mission patches--
This was STS-122, my first mission.

Then this was my final mission

where I flew with another
African American astronaut.

And, uh, this is the end
of the shuttle program, kind of,

so the silhouette of the space shuttle.

- You know what I really like is edibles.

I like edibles at nighttime
for me to sleep.

- Nah, you a, you a champ for that.
- Yeah.

- There's so many different types of food.

They makin' butter with it.
They makin' mayonnaise with it.

- They even have it in desserts
when they smoke the desserts up with it.

- They makin' it in pizza.

Like, it's just-- my tolerance for weed
in that manner is no good.

I'm like a baby bop out there.

But I could smoke most people
under the table, though.

- So, what happens to you
when you have no tolerance?

- Uh, I remember eatin' some
coconut candy that had THC in it,

and, man, it took me for a whole spin.

Man, I start actin' weird
like Pookie in the chicken coop

in the movie Friday.
- Yeah. Yeah.

- It is real weird,
you don't wanna see that side of me.

I'm tryin' to stay away from that side.

- I'm the best person
to ever play dominoes ever.

Ten.
- You gonna teach me how to play?

- No, 'cause I don't
really know what I'm doin'.

- You match the numbers
to get multiples of five.

Yeah, this five is a thing.

- And this ain't, this ain't--
- Ten.

- I helped you out.

- This ain't rocket science, is it?

All right, ready?
Yeah.

- No, no, no, no, no.
No, now it's my turn again.

My goodness!
When can I-- When can a brother play?

- Oh, my-- I can't stop scoring.

Can't stop. Won't stop.

- Oh, now she's an expert.

Wow, 15.
- Now, I am an expert.

- Is it my turn?
- Okay, now-- Yeah.

- A tap out?
Yeah.

- All right, tap the table, baby. Tap it.

What does that mean?

I'm basically starting over.

I'm not gonna win this.