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01x04 - Summer of Herramientas/Summer of La Naturaleza

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Primos". Aired: July 25, 2024 – present.*
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Series centers around a large Mexican-American family living in the neighboring Los Angeles town of Hacienda Hills.

01x04 - Summer of Herramientas/Summer of La Naturaleza

Post by bunniefuu »

[Opening theme music playing]

- [cat snarling]

- [dogs barking]

Hey! Another day

In my old hood ♪

Summer's starting

And it's gonna be so good ♪

Hey, oh, hey!

I was gonna be so cool ♪

Then you all moved in

And got me looking like a fool, again ♪

Oye, Primos ♪

Why you all up in my face ♪

Oye, Primos ♪

Get up out my space ♪

Oye, Primos ♪

You're wearing out my brain ♪

You're driving me insane ♪

Not the roll call again ♪

Cousin Bud, Nacho and Lita ♪

Tere, Tabi and Toñita ♪

Scooter, Lotlot and Gordita ♪

Nachito, ChaCha and Lucita ♪

Yay ♪

No, come on ♪

Oye, Primos ♪

[Grunts in frustration]

[Bud reading]

Cha cha cha cha!

[Aggressively] Cha cha cha

[Lovingly] Cha cha.

[All singing conga line dance song]

Happy Father's Day!

We got you a new baseball glove.

Oh, thank you.

[Both] He loves it!

[Camera clicking]

[all] Feliz Dia del Padre!

We got you daddy-daughter glam shots.

Oh! Gracias, mis niñas!

[All] He loves it!

Happy Father's Day!

We got you a gift card

to the hardware store.

Oh, yeah. Look at that.

Thanks.

- Do you love it?

- Well, I'll tell you what I'd love,

Fixing that Tater-shaped

hole in the fence.

[Groans]

[chuckles] Well, his card

oughta cover the supplies.

Guess I'm going

to the hardware store.

[Tires screeching]

We failed Dad.

Instead of a loving gift

to show how much we appreciate him,

we gifted him more work.

Now, he's off to the hardware store

when he could be staying home

with his adorable kids.

- And you.

- Eh, Bud be Bud.

Dad goes to the hardware store

all the time.

Yeah, but only because

we keep breaking stuff.

[Clattering]

[babbling and giggling]

Okey-dokey, then.

While you go crazy

fixing problems that don't exist,

I'm going Tio-watching.

Come here, Tio, Tio, Tio!

I guess it's up to us

to save Father's Day, then.

What do you say, Baby Bud?

[Babbles]

That's right! Time to learn

more about Dad, bond with him,

- and surprise him with a better gift.

- Yeah.

It's time for Operation

Booyah Buh-Dad!

[Grunts]

Tater and Baby Bud ♪

Looking for clues

In Dad's bedroom ♪

I wonder

What they'll find today ♪

[Babbles]

[Bud] Tools!

That's very disappointing ♪

Uh-huh.

Wonder what else they'll find ♪

It's just more tools ♪

Dad's gotta have

Some interests other than tools ♪

[Baby Bud babbles]

Nope, it's tools ♪

[Grunts angrily]

What the heck, Dad?

Why does he only like tools?

Even his vision board has tools!

This has gotta be

some sort of a joke, Dad.

[Gasps] "A joke, Dad"?

That's it!

A dad joke!

It's time for the next step

in Operation Booyah Buh-Dad,

bonding with him!

- [Sign buzzing]

- [crowd applauding]

We'll tell Dad the funniest dad joke

ever and make him laugh so hard,

his emotional dam will break.

Everyone's a flood of vulnerability!

Best Father's Day ever!

And just in time! Dad's here!

Hope he's ready to laugh.

- Hey, Dad.

- Yes, Sweet Potater?

- [Both giggling]

- Is the refrigerator running?

- [Tense music playing]

- Is it not? It was working this morning!

No, wait. It was just

a dad joke.

We don't have any Freon!

We should always

have emergency Freon.

Well, guess I'm going back

to the hardware store.

Dad, the fridge is fine!

[Bud whimpering]

We drove him there again.

Why does this keep happening?

Shh! Would you quiet down?

You'll spook the Tios.

Commencing Tio-watch.

Ooh, this is nice.

[Nellie] Mmm-hmm. Interesting.

Uh-huh.

- Oh, whoa.

- [Glass shattering]

Tio-watch log,

a Tio is always up

for a game of catch with his kids,

- even if he's not very good at it.

- Get back here!

[Chuckling] Almost got it

that time, champ.

[Straining] Whoa!

[Both grunt]

Ow.

Ooh, that's it, Baby Bud!

The perfect way to bond with Dad.

- [Babbles]

- Exactly!

No dad in the history of dads

could resist a game of catch

with his adorable kids!

And Bud will be way better

than Tio Ignacio.

I mean, he can't be worse.

Ah, perfect timing!

Let's play ball!

[Baseball music playing]

[babbling]

Uh-uh.

Uh-uh.

That's the signal.

Hey, Dad!

Catch this!

Huh? Whoa!

Oh, no.

Well, guess I'm going back

to the hardware store.

No, Dad, wait!

I [sighs] How?

[Sighs] Come here, Baby Bud.

This will be

our Father's Day gift for Dad.

We won't move or touch anything,

so we'll stop breaking stuff and making

him have to go to the hardware store.

[Panting]

Great idea, Bibi.

[Groans] Being Pop's

workout partner for Father's Day.

[Laughs and gasping]

[Tater] Must not break anything.

[Panting] Tater, is that you?

[Both grunt]

What's wrong, mijita?

I feel like everyone has a good

relationship with their dad.

You and Pop, the Primos

and the Tios.

Even the garage possum

and his kids.

Everyone [sighs] but me.

Aww, Tater, your dad [panting]

might not be like the other dads,

but he loves you all so much.

Oh, come on, Pop! Lunges?

Oh, Tater. [breathing heavily]

Everything will be okay, okay?

[Exclaiming in Spanish]

He's not like other dads, huh?

- [Babbling]

- Yeah, well

[Babbling urgently]

[Tater] If Dad really

loves us all so much,

would it k*ll him

if he showed it sometimes?

Tater?

Dad?

Well, I

Guess I'm going back

to the hardware store.

No! Dad, wait!

We can't let Dad drive off

to the hardware store again!

Strap in, Baby Bud, 'cause we're going

to the hardware store.

- [Grunting]

- [babbling]

There he is! Quick!

Dad, wait! I'm sorry

we keep breaking everything.

Huh? [voice trembles]

Oh, there you are, Dad.

[Ominous music playing]

You're not my dad!

What is happening?

[Sinister music playing]

[screaming and panting]

Daddy?

[Gasps] Papa?

[Whimpering]

Daddy! [yells]

[sobbing]

This is where

we keep driving dad off to.

It's a total nightmare!

Yello! Afternoon, everybody.

- [All greeting]

- Oh, hello, handsome.

[Old western music playing]

Hey, Bud. How do I fix

my leaky faucet?

Replace the gasket and seat washer.

How do I fix my squeaky hinges?

Spray 'em with lubricating oil.

Oh, thank you.

Thank you so much.

[Overlapping chatter]

Oh!

So, that's why Dad's

always so quick to come here.

It's his sanctuary.

All this time, I thought

we were driving him away,

but Dad actually fits in

super-well here.

He's so happy, Baby Bud.

Maybe the best present

we can give him

is to let him enjoy

his happy place in peace.

[Man] Dang, is there anything

Mr. Fixit can't fix?

[Bud] Actually, friends

There is.

Got a leaky faucet

I know what to do ♪

Had a tile come loose

I've got the perfect glue ♪

I can fix 'most anything

Y'all can think of ♪

But when it comes to

This here one thing ♪

I confess I'm feeling stuck ♪

They don't come

With manuals or rules ♪

So, no matter how I try ♪

I end up feeling like a fool ♪

Oh, yeah ♪

Things get tough ♪

With my kids ♪

My adorable kids ♪

I can't find the stuff

To patch it up ♪

It's the one thing

That I know I just can't fix ♪

I don't know what it is ♪

I got a wrench

For each occasion ♪

Every nut, bolt

Washer and screw ♪

But when it comes to

Talking brass tacks with my kids ♪

I just don't got the tools ♪

I don't got 'em.

[Yelps]

Are those

two of my adorable kids?

Dad. Uh

[Grunting nervously]

Oh, sandbags!

[Screaming]

[Dramatic music playing]

[screaming]

[indistinct commotion]

Kids, what are you doing here?

It was a dad joke.

And, then, the baseball.

[Babbling]

[sniffling] The fridge

is fine.

[Sobbing

and mumbling incoherently]

Oh, I see.

Come here, Sweet Potater.

[Soft instrumental

music playing]

I'm sorry I ran here.

I just needed a minute

to think about my

My feelings.

Kids don't come with tools

and a manual, you know?

Neither do dads.

[All exclaiming]

I love this place.

Well, guess we're going back home.

[Snoring]

[Soft instrumental music playing]

[door rings]

Don't forget your manners, boys.

[Speaking other language]

[both] Feliz Dia del Padre!

Ooh, a tortilla chip.

[Chuckles] Five-second rule.

I'm gonna put Baby Bud

down for a nap.

But when I'm back,

would you want to, maybe,

hang out with your old man

while he fixes the fence,

and the window, and the fridge?

The refrigerator is running, Dad.

Oh, sure, sure. I just wanna

check on it, though, just in case.

Happy Father's Day, Dad.

Thanks, Sweet Potater.

Ow! Tio Ignacio Oh.

Hey, Sport. Wanna play catch?

Tio Nellie. Sure.

[Laughs] Good one, kiddo.

All right.

[Grunts]

You know,

maybe the fence can wait.

Hey, got room for one more, kiddos?

[Tater] Yeah, get over here, Dad!

Here, catch!

Let your old man in here!

Put that pickle right in there!

Got 'er!

[Woman reading]

[Peaceful music playing]

[crowing]

[screeching loudly]

- [all snoring]

- [whimpering]

[snoring and farting]

[groaning]

[humming]

[groans]

Yikes. Ever heard of beauty sleep?

Because it has not heard

of you. Eh? Eh?

Not today, Nellie!

The Primos kept me up all night,

snoring, and sleep-talking,

and sleep-prootsing.

[Toilet flushing]

Good morning, Primas.

Is it?

How are you so awake?

Didn't the Primos keep you up?

Oh, I sleep outside.

Outside? In our yard?

- [Ominous music playing]

- [hissing and screeching]

[shivering]

And you survived?

Sure. Nature always provides.

All I need is the clothes on my back

and my bare little feeties.

[Dramatic music playing]

[Humming joyfully]

What a weirdo.

Maybe our sleep situation

isn't so bad after all.

[Farting loudly]

[groaning and yelling]

On second thought,

maybe Cousin Bud's onto something.

I can handle a little dirt

and sun, can't I?

I'm tough, rugged, nature-y.

[Gasps] This might even be

my final form!

[Heroic music playing]

I could be Nature-Tater,

commander of wild beasts!

- Charge!

- [Wolf howling]

[laughing maniacally]

Today, I begin my journey

to become Nature-Tater.

And tonight,

I sleep under the stars!

Huh. Good idea.

That's very supportive of you, Nellie.

Wait a minute.

Are you supporting my dreams?

What are sisters for?

[Slurps]

[groans in disgust]

All right, we're gonna start the bidding

on Tater's bunk at one week's chores.

Do I hear two weeks?

What about three?

You're renting out Tater's bed?

[Scoffs] No one's

gonna pay for that.

Oh, really? Even with complimentary

pillow chocolates?

[All gasp]

Cha-cha chocolate!

And a proots-proof canopy?

[All exclaiming]

Nature-Tater won't be needing

these. [chuckles]

[sizzling]

[yells] That's hot!

[Yells] That's sharp!

[Yells] That's stings!

Get off, get off, get off!

Oh, that's better.

Thank you, Mr. Rock.

- [Ominous music playing]

- [screeching]

[screams]

[continues screaming]

This will fix it.

Time to show nature

who's boss.

[Heroic music playing]

[whining] The sun is bright.

Ooh, shade!

Hey!

How's it even doing that?

There's gotta be a solution. Oh!

Booyah buh-bam!

Nature-Tater

can make her own shade.

[Grunts]

[yells]

[screaming]

Oh, my gosh!

Little buddy, are you okay?

[Tater crashing]

[groaning]

[barking]

[gasps] Sweet doggy!

What you doing

in our [gasps]

[screams] A snake!

- [Straining]

- [dog whimpering]

Come back!

[Groans]

Oh, hey! A whole strawberry.

- How are you?

- [Retches]

[Ominous music playing]

- [stomach rumbling]

- [groaning]

So hungry.

[Bird screeching]

[chirping]

Guavas!

[Grunts]

[groans]

[chuckles] Nature-Tater finds a way!

[Grunts]

[chirping angrily]

Whoops. Sorry.

Booyah buh-bam!

[Buzzing]

[screams]

I'm sorry! I didn't know

you guys had dibs!

[Screaming]

[yelling]

What made me think

I could be Nature-Tater?

Huh?

Come on, little buddies. I've got

a whole buffet for you in my compost.

How are you not getting stung?

Wild peppermint.

It's a natural wasp-deterrent.

Doesn't hurt 'em, though.

Oh, good.

I definitely don't wanna

hurt the bloodthirsty wasps!

Is everything okay, Tater?

I kind of noticed

you were having a rough morning,

but I didn't wanna interfere

with your process.

Please interfere!

Teach me how to control nature

like you!

[Laughing]

I don't try to control

anything, Tater-Gator.

We're all part

of the same nature fam.

Like this little guy.

[Screams] It's back!

Hey, little fella.

You weren't trying to scare

Tater before, were ya?

You were just trying to find

some shade from the sun.

And the sun isn't out

to get anyone, either.

It's just doing its best to help

the little planties grow.

The nature fam looks out for each other,

just like our fam.

[All shouting]

If there's anything you need,

the nature fam can provide it.

Food, shelter, peace.

What's the catch?

[Chuckles] No catch.

Just return the favor

by listening back to nature.

So, you're saying plants talk?

Not exactly.

But they communicate. See?

A withered leaf

is saying it needs water.

And look at this little dude

over here.

This dried up lizard just needs

some of that good old life juice.

[Chirping intensely]

Honestly, most things

just need water.

Oh, my compost.

Thanks, nature fam.

There you go, little buddy.

This will give you a place

to rest and recover.

See what I'm saying, Tater?

Nature's always talking

if you're willing to listen.

- [Wind blowing]

- [bird screeching]

[Tater] Whoa!

They're like little people!

Wow!

Huh?

[Enchanting music playing]

Hmm?

[Grunts softly]

[sighs]

Hmm?

- Hmm. Uh

- [Bees buzzing]

[wind blowing softly]

Looking good, Nature-Tater.

Thanks, Cousin Bud!

I'm gonna level up, become a rugged

woman of the great backyard

by sleeping under the stars

on my own.

Like a baby bird

leaving the nest.

I got you.

I'll sleep inside tonight.

Might be fun to hang out

with the Primo fam.

[Indistinct yelling]

Come on, Natalie,

I'll give you ten bucks!

I'll give you

an extra big hug tonight.

That's sweet, Lucita.

But I can't buy anything with hugs.

What else you got?

Maybe I'll go see

what Buela's up to.

[Sighs peacefully]

[owl hooting]

[insects trilling]

[screeching]

[animal screaming]

- [whimpers]

- [roaring]

What was that?

- [Suspenseful music playing]

- [rustling]

A coyote? A mountain lion?

El Chupacabra?

What do I do?

Remember, Tater,

listen to the nature fam.

[Breath trembling]

Come on, Tater.

Um, hello out there!

I'm listening,

and I'm hearing

that you're angry,

and possibly wanna eat me!

[Whimpering]

Aww.

[Whimpers softly]

Hey, I know you.

[Whimpers]

It's okay.

Do you need help

getting that thing off?

[Whimpers]

Maybe a little hydration, Major-Tater?

[Soft instrumental music playing]

Ah, that's better.

So, it might be easier

without the tire.

[Barking joyfully]

Oh, there you go!

You can go home to your family.

[Whimpers]

Do you wanna stay?

[Farts]

Oh, I like you, too.

[Snoring]

[gasps] Breakfast!

Hey, Tater. Buela sends her love

and chilaquiles.

How was your night,

little nature buddy?

Amazing! I've never

slept better in my life.

Oh, I even made a friend

Or I thought I did.

I helped the dog last night, but I guess

she didn't wanna stick around.

Hey, don't feel bad.

That's another way

the nature fam is like our fam.

They might not wanna hang out

all the time,

but the bond is for life.

- I hope so.

- [Barking distantly]

I feel like I can still hear

her sweet little bark in my mind.

- [Barking]

- Uh, Tater.

[Laughing] You're back!

And you brought your friends!

[All panting]

[all barking]

Nature-Tater happy!

Soar, little Tater bird. Soar!

[Laughing]

[howling]

- I demand a refund!

- Hey!

These sheets

are not 500 thread count.

Why is this bagel soggy?

This is gross.

[Farts]

[Closing theme music playing]