01x31 - ALL EPISODES Compilation

[bunniefuu]

[Applause] that we kept me into hell yah he's

hooked up with a half day and the sturdiest over to starboard there since is a shake in the shackles Cap'n that

capstans caught up in the c*ck captain and this company stupid what do we do Cappy

shackle Scarpas find me the ship's dictionary

[Music]

yes it had been a shocking tempest but in the night the wind died the wave

subsided and next morning there was nothing to be seen save for a tiny rod and on it

a solitary k*ller sputtering starfish what a staggering storm can't remember a

thing after that last great wave suppose I'm lucky to be alive but oh dear me

the ship foundered me shipmates lost not a sail in sight and I'm all alone on the

boundless ocean jumpin jellyfish what's that if bow recapping a the victory what

use are stood for kept heed and your early morning copper cabin with your

babies Cap'n they don't change I've delivered today well if you all come from cruise port is

Cappy down below of course but Oh duh

where's your itch this ship sunk without trace masturbate we are alone in the

midst of a hostile ocean oh we're at the mercy of the Sharks of a she monsters he

monsters pirate ballasts most of them are masculine can't be a Cappy

if my eyes do not mistake me I perceive a sail scuttling cuttlefish so it is

well save me hearties full speed ahead

[Music]

like you can't beat we don't know what she is and just well that might make

them think we were pirates no no that would never do yeah Troy dishwashers Caffrey oh the very thing

masturbator oh yes that's much better [Music]

[Applause] I reckon is something familiar about that ship government yes since I've seen

it somewhere before why shuddering shucks it's my own ship it's the back pain it's Tom the cabin

boy yes have we'd ever even noticed you with BC come on board all of you you're

just in time for breakfast it's sausages today

welcome back to the black pickin and what on earth you wearing that ridiculous hat for well but I still

don't understand that glass big wave

tore the whole oh well Decker way plus the hatch and the crew's quarters at all

and I've been sailing around ever since trying to find you well I'll be stubborn

see fits like a glove incredible right you get it nailed down

while I finish off the breakfast so the Pirates set to work with hammer and

nails and very soon everything was more or less shipshape again see it um you

can trust to your gallant kept him to stick to his ship at all cost Hey yes well I suppose he did stick to

part of it for Tom but he just carried on frying the sausages for breakfast and

settling as the black pig sail happily away in search of new adventures

Ready to Fire

ready to fire it was a fine day for

target practice the black pig lay at anchor in the Lee of a friendly seaport and the knowledge that cutthroat Jake

the captain's worst enemy was locked up in the town prison made Pugwash unusually competent having thus far

discharged a gunpowder only we will now proceed to work with the cannon ball

load up master mate and make sure that your weapon is pointing out to sea we do

not wish to cause consternation ashore we are she a great fire kappa

congratulations master mate you have hit one of the larger buildings on the p-side well done master mate I always

knew you was silenced pirate William that was moreover our one and only

cannonball we shall now have to relish or to retrieve it maybe it was just as

well they didn't fire it over the ocean [Music]

only thing is I have a sort of idea that the building I hit is the town prison

[Music]

you've done it good and proper this time master mate yes I wonder if there's anyone at home

please could we have our ball back thank

heavens for that there's a oh oh yes you

all ruffian you cutthroat Jake at your service disturb a peaceful citizen

Havanese afternoon at would ya click the back to the ship after a boys

[Music]

hang on Captain Oh tight Master mate that's right Barnabas careful Willy

yeah we're capping yeah go to board us well do something then that the hoist

the main saw weigh the anchor full speed ahead but don't worry

Willie's gunpowder will do the trick listen now we can voice the main slow

weigh the anchor and go full speed ahead just you wait I'll make sure so but

there was nothing much that cutthroat Jake could do as he and his crew heaved and shot helplessly in their longboat

and the black pig sailed away from the harbor captain to think up that cunning

wheeze and breathe Oh Jake to his knees or should I say sneeze yes but the

captain won't be so happy when he finds he has to do without pepper for the rest of the voyage for Tom as he steered the

ship safely out into the open sea he said

Sea Monsters

turn lad bring me my navigation table hey welcome master mate mate charts

please watch our as requested Cappy pirates Winnie vomitus my compass and

dividers please thank you now holding the chart down with the compass thus and

taking the dividers firmly in the right hand we shut the eyes tightly and find

our position thus amazing what one can do with modern scientific instruments

[Music]

the fact was that Captain Pugwash was lost not only lost but be calmed as well

no breath of wind stirred the sails and even if it had the captain hadn't the

faintest idea which way to sail in actual fact Cappy I could tell you

exactly where we are indeed master mate how so we are here which says beware of

sea monsters and what leads you to that's conclusion because if you look

over your shoulder carried you would observe with dirty great sea monster battling barnacles Oh what's it want

can't be food I should think yeah I reckon that means us no no woody that's

not a man-eating monster let's try it with some ships biscuits there there careful tom laddered it out don't go too

close there it seems to like that and

that's given me an idea can suppose you take another box of biscuits and a length of rope let the others hoist you

up the mast out along the yardarm and lower onto the monsters head then you

can dangle the biscuits in front of its nose like a carrot in front of a donkey the monster will chase the biscuits and

we put a tow rope on its tail and away we go away

excellent Tom only I think it would be better if you or did the oh no captain

I've got to keep the monster happy with my concertina oh very well right out to

the end of the yard huh Oh God Cap'n oh

yes told it he Peter got a guy older dog way round

never mind the results the same now all we need to do is to get this rope onto

the monster's tail like that

[Music]

suffering seaweed said the captain as he sat some time later in his cabin I feel

like a really sumptuous supper after all that excitement huh you look like being a really sumptuous

supper for the monster for Tom as he gazed out of the window the black pig

was safety at anchor and the monster was enjoying its supper too maybe it's just

as well some sea monsters are vegetarian

[Applause]

rice three nice does what a ridiculous rumpus master mate Barnabas Willie but in the name of

Neptune are you all doing up there the

book witness there's a Berber mouse in the crew's quarters it was some time

before the captain was able to persuade his crew to come down from the crow's nest and when at last they did hogwash

was in a very bad temper in T crippling slavish you're a fine look you are

scared stiff by a mouse ah we please work no holder about capping you jib

work happy tossed more sighs hey I'm we saw a shadow or a bone in which case arm

yourself to the teeth me hearties this thing whatever it is must be destroyed very soon the Pirates were preparing for

the hunters they were still frightened and would have been even more so if they've known what was approaching on the starboard bow as the harbour clock

struck midnight

muffled the oars me Anselm's that old ruffians in for the shock of his life in a moment moon over ready right we will

search every nook and cranny of the ship lead our master mate oh yeah I kept need lead old pilot Barnabas I all I'm a stir

might lead on Willie boy it's not fair they've never anyone for me to give the orders to see anything pirate Willie

nothing captain only dumb the cabin boy a snake beneath them there anything

pirate Barnabas nah free Cathy smell anything master mate you chew one of

them's caught a cold by the sound of it they will catch a D or worse in a moment right

that's every corner accounted for except my cabin and if there's nothing there I shall know you've been imagining things

leave [Music]

there you are told yourself not a thing in sight what's that someone coming

it's bug wash they're armed run for it

here what was him splashes always em blokes what was running away and what

was that thing in my cabin what on earth was all that noise about shouting and

banging and bumping and has anyone seen my pet mouse mouse in your cabin captain

hello whiskers what do you mean by escaping like that look captain here is

and not what a huge shadow he makes on the cabin wall well I'll be oh come on

all of you it's bedtime and very soon

all the Pirates were fast asleep in their bunks the captain's left to

dreaming of buried treasure and nobody knew what had really happened

that night except possibly Hans Mouse

Arise

alloys sir Horatio hogwash the rhizomatous tit that's what I said

man arise jumpin jellyfish arise how much sire I'm rich I'm rich

I wake up captain this morning well hey what's that morning captain the crews ready to start work but I was

having a beautiful dream I dreamed I was being decorated no no captain it's not

you that's being decorated it's the ship tom was right the day

before hogwash had decided that his ship should be the smartest on the seven seas and on his orders the Pirates had bought

up every Paint Pot and brush in port the modern ship is painted from stem to

stern in brilliant colors inside and out the all outdated decoration should be

dispensed with ah there you are master mate crew all present and prepared to proceed with the

paintwork happy proceed away master mate [Music]

[Applause] [Music] it is customary a pirate with it to rise

to your feet when your captain approaches okkkk gone Cap'n I'm stuck to

the Unreal yes well that was very foolish off your pirate with it [Music]

the mother pig ahead should represent some well-known personnage or heroic

figure quite so well something will have to be done about that [Music]

yes a great improvement what a blooming

canons polish next ah there you are pirates anibus I was just thinking that cannons Perdue with the Polish

[Music] and that's me hearties might be said to

be that except for one little matter in my own cabin er was it now uh yes sir

the pillars are no longer in fashion and should be removed whenever possible and

I find that particular pillar particularly tedious kindly remove it but captain that particular pillar you

call it is no matter what I call it Tom I'm tired of it sir there can't be if I was you or that you are not master mate

remove that pillar this instant come to

think of it that pillars been there ever since I had this ship all the more reason for getting rid of it huh thank

you

you're right Cap'n as it happens I am Tom but battling barnacles bubble

whatever was that the mizzenmast captain you see if you'd looked at this picture you'd have seen that it goes right

through your cabin to the keel you made him cut off the bottom of the mizzenmast and this time as he surveyed the

wreckage around him it was the captain's turned to say

you [Music]

The Dungeon

scuttling cuttlefish they recognize me talents at last love me to carry out a

spot of piracy for him no doubt for a thousand pounds that's not bad not bad at all there you

are Horatio Pugwash at your service better thousand pounds I take him away and that

my friends is the last you'll see of him for a while or a cat in posh trapped by

his own stupidity and greed he lay in the deepest dungeon of the town jail lit only by one small window high above him

the jail was by the very water's edge and a mere hundred yards away aboard the

black pig his shipmates held a gloomy council of w*r what do we do ship eh

what do we do as about me storms agile and rescues him like sheep possible that

prisons will die impregnable let's blow up twelves we're gunpowder and I blow up

our captain sky-high no no Willy I've got it there's the

dungeon window and the captain must be at about that level right we all bore a tunnel to the

dungeon at low tide quick now at eight weeks no no quite a little one

we'll use this you'll see it was ten

o'clock and dark and the tide was right down when Tom and the Pirates set off to

rescue their captain right you keep

watch Willy we'll start drilling [Applause]

dolloping dolphins what again suppose I'd better try to get some sleep

[Applause] just a bit more we must be nearly

through by now oh well I'll be scuppered

and if that's meant to be an escape hole it's a bit small even for my slim Ithaca

the bus this and note on the end of stick will pick you up at high tide hope

you can float and it's signed Tom but that doesn't make sense

backside what's the tide got it hey Tom

lad the toys flooding the drill oh I know but the dungeon will fill up with

water I know they are kept he will be drownded oh no he won't not if he can

keep afloat now all we do is wait till

the dawn and on time well if he wails

the window and by now if I'm not mistaken he must be nearly able to reach

the window yes there is that's right hold on Catherine will soon

have you out crapping master mate that's right [Applause] [Music] II

[Applause] and very soon the Pirates had their

captain back on board again and the black cake was sailing away into the dorm the crew posted like anything about

the heroic rescue of their captain now asleep and snug at his back but tom was

busy ringing out the captain's wet clothes [Applause]

The Picnic

and

[Music] bring kids and treasure chests that look

just the place pull up onto the beach me hearties take the chest up there under

the palm trees careful now don't drop it that's right open it up correctly

captain you - proud this time yeah fair makes me mouth water hate won't

take long to make that lock disappear yes well you could always trust your old captain to choose their perfect spot for

the annual pirate picnic party it had

been a perfect picnic in the tropical sunshine and Captain Pugwash and his crew felt fat satisfied and sleepy and

now for 40 winks dreams of treasure eh me hearties you are fabu captain what

about all this here little like persons was brought up proper night me very easy

idea after a picnic oh come off it Master Mike brought up proper indeed now

how'd you like it if heavy Highland is riddled with rock no rubbish quite right master mate top lad put it in the chest

and bury it up behind those rocks there we don't want our dreams disturbed with

digging aye aye captain Oh

Hey look who's coming that's cutthroat Jake ship and it's making straight for the

island I'm just gonna move on ha ha

there's a sight for sore eyes me Anselm's the black pig the washing is

scatterbrain crew sunbathing and oh h* one of them digging burying treasure

I'll be bound the long bolt they're coming ashore time to be off

wake up captain Willy's Barnabus masturbate wake up cutthroat Jake's here

he'll he'll be on the island at any moment click back to the dinghy don't

forget the picnic chest

looks like our pretty birds are flown today but never mind it's what they've

left behind we're after get well very dear seek a peek in Rhode Island yes and

they're making replacement Tom Perry the rubbish in dithering dustbins

they're digging it up oh wait for it

bones ba*ls no nice games yes and I'll

tell you something else Cap'n its lucky JD can get there a day earlier cause guess what when I made the hole to put

the rubbish in I dug up something else shoved it all in the box and there it is

Oh treasure Bravo Tom will will will it

just shows joking there is something to be said for Beebe wrote up

Treasure Bravo

[Music]

Captain Pugwash had had some strange adventures in his day but to find

himself inside a great fish was something new even to him and it was lucky that his pockets contained a

candle and some matches even so not

exactly the best ending to an angling expedition there was I hoping for a nice

bit of fish from his supper and it seems to have worked up the other way around let me see how my host seems to have

done fairly well already one portion of rusty anchor to start with served with a

few pickled ship's timbers nice juicy rocks as a main course bit tough night of thought mixed Kevin's

and cordage rather like spaghetti and all washed down with a few barrels of

rub lucky fish can't say I ever cared for eating sand though

fluttering flounders footprints leading that way looks as though we have company

where do they go now well now beasts covered a dinghy with a

treasure chest in it huh that's a rich diet to be sure don't silver rubies

emeralds money money money and it's mine

oh my oh no it isn't it isn't oh yes it is

it's hey who said that I did do me a

real g*n games did she what I will peaceably make it away with when they see a great fish swallowed me up and I

just working up me get away when you turns up come on draw a sword captain

there's only room for one of us aboard this fish c*ptive last capture your boy

hard a-starboard tub hard to stop it at this master mate here's a rep captain

catch and very soon hogwash was safely hold up the side of his ship

cutthroat Jake floundered furiously in the water some distance away and he was

even more furious as he watched Tom dragging his treasure chest up on board

the black pig excellent excellent a splendid day's fishing hey me hearties

poor old cutthroat Jake yeah but we caught Josh levy catching supposed that

there fish not to worry master mate he's welcome to my ding if he wants it there's an island for him to land on not

so far away and as for the fish well he's not likely to swallow either

of us again

Complaints

we party captain to crew wishes to actor a complaint complaints complaints what's

it about this time masturbate ships biscuits is unfit for you were could such a getting if full of huevos rubbish

man what's wrong with a few levels it made head of edom catching reckon it's cruelty to weevils come to enforce

discipline aboard this ship tough big turtles that'll teach em all decks will

be double stopped before breakfast I'll give you double scrubbing all ranks will

perform physical training exercises after breakfast a of a worn away shadow

a breakfast will consist of ships biscuits with weevils that settles it then all right that

settles it for each inmate to the captain's cabin quick botch left right

left right left right right oh I'm in

walloping Wales what is the meaning of this begging party captain but the crew

has decided to take over the ship available aye we're all captain's now the cooker I could cut that and you're forecasting

adrift in the ding-ding job gauge pack up the captain's kicks and put it in the DG he's leaving

I almost er mate [Music]

hang on Captain make room for me room Peru but you can't go to oh dear

what do you expect I'm his cabin boy bye or

and a moment later tom was rowing Pugwash in the dingey away from the black pig

and the Pirates watched as the little boat pulled further and further into the distance

right capping Barnabas set the maid saw kept me Winnie set a course nor by

northeast and I'll make this all a nice cup of tea oh I can't be mate Oh which is the might saw it well let me

see yeah well no no not that one look out now look what you've read and got it dad

top wouldn't it dad cuckoo displaces Willie what would you think you're doing out there I'm setting a car seat gosh bad

overboard look it's all right he's coming up this side hey looky I let God

compass alright it rounded not the compass so what tom was the only one who

knew out there working out that nice company coming on dead cop might know TCH

Tom's got off with a teapot Oh it'll be suppertime soon and no top the cooking

then it'll be bedtime and no adopter MacBooks Oh baby the beauty works such a

good idea after all

power down hum they're putting up a flag signal Oh Co but with an e instead of a B come

that's me back back yes sir the ball without a bead or fish - effort h is for

give instead of five head for give em oh

come back all these forgive him full speed astern tom lad they couldn't

get far without their old captain hey but tom was very busy setting a course and seemed to the sales and the supper

and he said nothing

Bank Robbery

1000 gold crowns for safekeeping if you please certainly captain sir the money shall be

placed in our deepest and most dependable vaults guard it well you have

there the fruits of a lifetime's dishonest there I mean an honest toil a

thousand crowns in the bank Captain Pugwash felt confident secure and ready

to face anybody anybody that falls except his own crew laughter the way out

of the way all of you probably captured but this year's a parade parade what

parade paper a cat food paper a hit oh no sorry quite impossible haven't got a

penny to me name now see here cat we'd

go and go and they'll go and rob a bank or something rob a bank

yeah maybe he's got something there [Music]

push it push it push it come on put Shh Willie right now the shop next door

belongs to the old bank abide and I got the key below is a cellar what must be

bang next to the backbone [Music]

Oh like forward pirate buddy hey lookie

we got bad boy will do you how's it going in pirate be buddy through in a

jiffy master might there it's open hey Charlotte Willy Wailord ever look at

that [Music]

what shall we do

[Music] hey bow it up she Rises

hey hey

Oh dr. Roz are suffering sea snakes I'll

say it's a lie in the morning far too early to be singing sea shanties where in the name of Neptune have you been all

right you big lug kept cheek but we be the Hoopoe the a poppy well lonely and

what may when asked did you use for money robbed a bank Cap'n like you said oh yes

smart work me hearties robbed a bit robbed a bank which bank

debris bank it were kept EGH found a big bag of gold crowd I always spend every penny of it we did

what well it was deep or the captain had fallen into a deep faint from which not

even Tom could revive him poor L kept cheek why you'd all Barry thought it

were his body beats bed

Jolly Roger

[Music] [Applause] [Music]

like the answer here's the plan we're disguised as a peaceful law-abiding ship

see and hope hogwash over there or retinue is just right to be plundered so

he lights the Jolly Roger put a shot across our barrows and then we tune like

we were scared he comes alongside all innocent and we boards him and rips it

Weimer puts him into the old scallywag once and for all it was a perfect day

for piracy for Captain Pugwash the sea was calm the Pirates were awake and all

it was needed was a defenseless victim a fine fat unarmed merchant man that's

what we won't masturbate I say a sail on the port beam dolloping dolphins my

dream come true hoist the Jolly Roger heave to put a shot across her bowels Oh er captain and

where is the Jolly Roger captain in me cabin on me bunk Master mate oh this is

too good to be true I shall be rich beyond my wildest dreams [Music]

Jori Roger HD can mean only that is not the Jolly Roger master mate for that is

my best night down and this is not washing day only no what about the shot

across the bow is kated coming carried got involved Oh me got me oh dear

try again little fish

try this one captain oh thank you Tom right one shot across our bowels report

went aim to fire and look lively where our prize will escape us gonna Barnabas

what is he gonna Willy which end is the bow then the bass is the sharp a mate a

that which is this dead man the stone is the bucket Willie boy ah but Stern means

severe under now stielike and uh steamy sharpish and that means the stern to sharpen now

see a pirate Willie Joe the bow is the back end tizen days Tricia days now look here

Willie boy I am looking there tethering dogfish do we have to dawdle all day but

a ball across her bowels are out look if you two can't decide which Indies which put a shot in the middle of her to make

sure good idea table lad line it up gunner Willie hi go to Barnabas there now ready to fire ah

[Music] built hit dunderheads I said a shot

across the bow and you've gotten sunk huh or have you why muttering mast-heads

that was no merchantman it was cutthroat Jake ship huh

thought he could sneak up on us disguise as a law-abiding trading vessel eh but I

was too clever for him help me fire until the last moment a master mate and then with an airing accuracy blew him

out of the water didn't die will a fatherless takes intelligence to spot a trick like that hey Tom but tom was busy

steering the ship towards Jake and his crew to pick them up he'd spotted the trake along before anybody else and the

only thing that had really surprised him was the William Barnabas have managed to hit anything at all

[Music]

The Bride

oh happy happy happy tomorrow we are to

Wed wish you no man could surely happier be unless I had her money instead when

Captain Pugwash decided to marry a wealthy widow he took a room in an inn on shore conveniently close to the church and at

a safe distance from the black pig or the crew were far from pleased oh I reckon we ought to kidnap him like I

Jack him before he gets hitched hey possible pirate Barnabas we ain't even been asked to the ceremony

hey what worried he said not smart enough to me darling posh new friends

imagining a woman on board yes mrs. pop wash no mrs. Pat waffle

don't be I've raided our pirate be let's get some sleep God's late not with them blooming bells

the bells at cause but you'll have to hurry now listen half an hour today and I'll

be a married man can't say I might relish the prospect on the other hand just think of all that lovely money

that's better now you're beginning to look the part put your hat on Willy hey I'm almost

ready to get married myself no crippling crayfish shall I never get this crap out

tide I hope it comes to be future brother-in-law hasten captain the bride

arrives in 10 minutes [Music]

[Music] [Applause] [Music]

every inch the Gallants bridegroom a huh the how goes it brother-in-law my sister

is even now arriving is she by Neptune under have you the ring the ring where

did I put it hurry she's making for the church oh oh you have it oh you have it oh let us

away then hey better late than never well they really do know but your comes

bride [Music]

they know Beauty BC Navy but works a fortune a shade and Europe a best mine

and groove [Music]

[Music]

bring back that bridegroom but it was too late by now the Pirates had got

their captains into the dinghy very soon

they had him aboard and the black pig was on its way to the open sea captain Pugwash was furious Rascals rapscallions

I'll keelhaul the lot of you I'll string you from the yardarm oh that's money it's all right captain

the lady's luggage came aboard a quarter of an hour ago earned a jewel kite generate dolloping dolphins diamonds

pearls I'm rich rich and I'm still single well done me hearties yo buhdeuce Eve a

bit hard on the bride like lost her body lost her a be lost you're not poor lady

poor lady nothing if you ask me she got off cheap or meat aside who ever want to

be married to the captain all their life

The Wasp

[Applause]

[Music]

[Music] [Applause] [Music]

there there captain it's only a wasp sting the older wasp sting indeed

suffering seahorses I'll slay that wasp I'll I know what I'll do I'll offer a

reward to someone else to slay it for me 50 golden crowns it'll be safer that way

what you kept except the heat sect chauvinist you know more

[Music]

[Applause] [Music]

[Applause] [Music]

hello

[Music] yeah yeah well what do you expect with a

blowin butterfly net it's my turn now I know I prefer the cold steel

[Laughter] [Music] [Laughter]

[Music]

now get out of debt when you're old fashioned goodness I'm for modern ways gunpowder cannon and

the bottom oniy wasps like oniy

[Music]

there's a good wash the fools idiots but

the mate nearly drowns himself Barnabus brings half the rigging down and willie blows the ship up you know

captain the easy way to catch a wasp is with a mark and a bit of paper like this

will I'd ever come lad the reward is yours keep it captain the

reward was for k*lling the wasps I'm gonna look after it till we reach land and you're going to need the money to

put this lot straight

Lost in the Jungle

[Music] laughs me happy chattering shots I can

hardly wait to get ashore somewhere in that jungle is hidden all the gold of the Inca Indians oh just think of it a

yellow beaming delicious delicious what come gold pirate William gold hey when I

add yellow and delicious I thought you meant bananas next morning Captain

Pugwash set off with his expedition through the hot steamy tropical jungle in search of the lost gold of the Incas

the captain led the way Barnabas and the mate follow Tom had been left to guard

the ship so Willie brought up the rear with the provisions Hey blubber wapas

how's the captain going to find us here golden master mate he has a nose for it pirate B it's

getting back what worries me [Applause]

[Applause]

[Applause]

[Applause] whatever is it captain pull yourselves

together me hearties it is merely an Inca statue and why galloping galleons the gold may well be

concealed nearby we need the map digging tours I know I reckon it's dinnertime where's Willy it well a well where is he

we'll have to go back and look for him oh no each be swallowed all of a

mouthful for some mouthful there goes the noblest to me cruel of what a way to

go poor Willy we should not see he's not a guy he'd best bananas in the old

jungle up here hmm come down from there you you new idle useless nitwit

numbskull you and a threatening he'd been swerd up at all you ought to be a shape your shelf pipe Willy hey captain

girlie if that wasn't Willy what was being indigestion take heed what was it you it

was the provision chess master mate they're disappearing into the jungle you'll see all that is most vital and

essential to our expedition including our dinner not merely that's pirate Barnabas a map compass and jungle

survival kit oh we are lost me hearties lost in this trackless treacherous wilderness beyond hope of recovery oh

dear oh tottering Turtles its tongue oh

there you are I knew you must be somewhere here I've got a hot dinner ready back at the ship

thought you might be getting hungry you can say that again very low your bubble toe blade I'm a

banana but however did you find us we're lost in the heart of a trackless trade

oh that was easy captain there's a trail of banana skins all the way from here to the spot where you landed it's only

about a mile away hey glad to see that so the Pirates set off back the way they'd come

to follow the trail of Willie's banana skins back to the ship they were so relieved to find they

weren't lost after all and so looking forward to that hot dinner that they forgot all about the lost treasure of

the Incas Willie had eaten so many bananas but he had to be carried all the

way by Barnabas and the mate but then as he said himself well it was me got his

found weren't it and after all the nice things they said about me up in tree I reckon I deserve it

[Music] [Laughter]

yes here's the spot me hearties where the good ship dolphin was blown by a

hurricane 50 years ago trust high or an iceberg and there they stay she lies frozen forever in the polar wastes with

a great treasure of diamonds aboard abandoned by her crew that is our next

expedition lads to the frozen north to recover the lost diamonds of the dolphin we leave at dawn so they do do

they we leave tonight it were some weeks

later when the captain's polar expedition reached the edge of the ice cap and set off across the frozen wastes

in their search for the Diamonds of the dolphin the captain had issued special Arctic clothing but even so the coal was

so bitter as they push forward in the teeth of the freezing gale never mind our lad thanks to your excellent I mean

my excellent map reading we must be nearly there well what would that he

said pilot me how do you nothing might maybe teeth is chattering too loud

captain captain we're here we've reached our destination see there the rain

Dutchman it's the dolphin no doubt about it forward me hearties the diamonds are

yes it's the dolphin all right look what did I tell you now I wonder where they

kept the diamonds in the captain's cabin if we were anything like sub captains or no gentlemen Christie's at amend as I

predicted the Diamonds of the dolphin are ours boy get him spotless ours for

the taking Oh yours for the taking a yours for the

I jump world like me cuz I was Arif re and the gems is mine mine trust some up

me Anselm's and grab their witness while we're at it we must be getting back home leaving this lakhna parish a cold like

fish fingers in a freezer very soon hogwash and his crew were tied and

helpless and Jake and his men were so busy putting on their warm clothes but they forgot all about Tom and didn't

notice what he was up to by the cabin window in fact they didn't even know that he was there at all

so now we must be on our way night-night sleep tight and make sure Anna Frost

don't bite [Applause]

um give Jacob his crew time to get away right they've gone now if I can just get

you free captain right you untie the others I'll go and get the sledge ready

for the return [Music]

how's that then we'll get back a sight faster than we came all aboard so the

Pirates set off back to the Black team carried along by the same bitter wind which had battered them on the way up

the ports are mad Malheur two points to starboard

Black Pete ahoy captain strike the match so prepare to eat old

[Music]

poor old cat throw Jake I'm just too clever for him Amy hotties yeah but will he has abscond

I did with the dire Birds oh no master mate he hasn't got them but the but he took the box yes but I've got the

diamonds here in my pockets you see I filled the box with lumps of ice while they were tying you up and all

that Jake will have when he gets back into the warm is a box full of water [Laughter]

we birthday captain from a friend a friend that's rich fancy old pod wash

celebrating his birthday tomorrow in the same pot what we are in no to place the

yes well let's call it a candle and you can row it over and pop it in with these other presses and be notes like it'll be

the last birthday he ever has this side a kingdom come

[Music] [Laughter] [Music]

[Laughter] [Music]

[Laughter] [Music]

morning captain wake up captain it's your birthday many happy returns birthday presents

parties whoopee I've got the key of the door never biggie party cap cheek but by

I or behalf the crew terribly congratulations presence would be more acceptable masturbate quite show captain

well pair of bed socks what I give myself one bottle of bubble bath for your morning tub cabin and to back it to

jelly babies yes no during the old silver frankly I'm just well this I see

that open it up top battling barnacles a birthday cake the biggest birthday cake

I've ever seen from a friend oh well of course that I have so many friends you

know anyway we must have a party yes a birthday tea here at six o'clock

precisely walloping whales I can hardly wait right Theo me Ansem pull her up to

the stern this is one party I wouldn't miss for anything quiet please quiet all

of you silence for the birthday boy I shall now like the candle of this splendid cake

and conduct you in the song which are doubtless longing to sing it mate from

the moment he likes that candle he's got 25 seconds to live and one and two and

three happy birthday to you of course I'd know

that voice anywhere and now I know where that cake came from watch out Bubba Tom my cake this is monstrous

I really must prep right you can get up

now I thought that was it an expl*sive birthday cake made of gunpowder and if

you ask me it's gone back to the kind friend who sent it cuddling cuttlefish it's cutthroat Jake will no idea but

he'll I get you I'll give you a happy birthday

I mean well what are we going to do for

a cake oh that's all right captain I made one for you yesterday only when I saw your present I didn't bother here it

is I'm glad you're a marvel

[Music]

it's all right Cap'n it was only one of the balloons going pop

[Music]

whistling widdershins it's the witches oh now you secret black and midnight

hags why fancy that it's the captain what is Steudle making

an ascot I feel better for that I dare

say ducks and what could we do for you now well I caught about your advertisement

it's here somewhere flowers at dearie various what's he up

to then Shh I will soon find out

which is yeah I don't like it Shh listen man we've got a part of the secret ocean

right here wondrous stuff it is ducky works like magic magic she said the price is ten

gold pieces to you theory Tendo Pete but that's daylight business

I mean moonlight robbery not when you see what I'll do for your ducks you won't know yourself we won't you know

are you doing he's going to change yourself redo something ain't a girl feel fair spoon when I say yeah

something nasty of that oh very well here's the money it is the thousand

quick back the Sheep tabby remember I know first thing in the

morning bye good luck

[Music] the morning was clear and bright after

the thunderstorm and Pugwash and his crew were safely back abort mission the captain slept well after his

adventure with the witches but the Pirates were anxious and early lately with the head node next please

I don't like it no no me neither first thing in the morning I said let's go and

see what he's up to so the Pirates set off for the captain's cabin they've lost Tom fast asleep in the

storeroom and came to the cabin door each doctor he's not answering your mood

maybe use their only yeah well maybe he's change like we best affected Hector

II do you see he's God eat ooh Yahoo

it's not guy said he he's changed his self you know kept cheek l could you

part make a media boatykappa yeah

what's the the orders for the day canteen Francie a tasty but you see wait

for your breakfast captain sputtering starfish what are you all up to I get up early to take a turn on the top

Nick come back and find your gaping utter no Rach that's Kevin bye tom yes

captain what is this loathsome creature doing in my cabin if you must collect tame toads

kindly keep them in your own quarters sorry captain and now I must try out my

new paper medicine amazing what you can buy these days works like magic they say

won't recognize myself once I've used it and the girls will swoon with delight when they see me my goodness yes me

hearties if those old ladies are right it's fantastic what this Paris torrid if

we'll do

treasure map hooray hooray the captain cried with glee and straight

away without delay the ship put out to sea they sailed all day they sailed all night they sailed two thousand mile

until at last there came in sight that tropic Treasure Isle they - - all well

our fortunes ready-made twas then the mate remark oh dear we'd ever broke a

spade this is too ridiculous treasure

for the taking and we haven't even got a toy trowel yanked crowns big dejar de

Zeeuw Rock cake I knew I ought you chided naughty blanky maybe we could sell back I will fetch some tools no

time hire a Barnabas I happen to know that cutthroat Jake's after this not to maybe you could find something to dig

with on the island the our fuel girl so the mate and Barnabas and worry set

off into the jungle undergrowth to look for tools leaving hogwash and Tom at the place where the treasure was buried six

foot deep I can't bear it um so near and yet listen it's the crew

maybe they've met Jake maybe they've

they're coming this way

we was chased Cap'n by a huge wild beast Cap'n we're great tusks and lumps and

bumps Cap'n you eat Cubs

oh that's what it is it's a warthog it's

all right captain treat it properly and why of course I remember reading

somewhere warthogs love digging holes love digging holes digging holes Oh

treasure each started hex give

excavating boy is going fast

[Music]

[Music] he must be nearly six foot dog he

started he's done it so the Pirates carried the treasure

chest in triumph back to their dinghy while Tom made a fuss of the warthog and fed its special jungle roots as a reward

very soon they were all back aboard the black pig and the hog settled down to

sleep it off in his cool shady hole right hoist the main saw weigh the anchor and

set course for home sweet home hey you were right about cutthroat Jake he's on

the island he's making for the place where the treasure was he's looking into the hole

he doesn't look too pleased hook no treasure eh he's prodding into the hole

friend isn't going to like that much and he doesn't he's after him go get him

goodie he's chasing him to the water's edge he's catching up with him he's nearly there

he's gossip [Applause] [Music]

[Music]

irenna captain scott barley nobody's done this afternoon we're walking through the town quite natural light

when he spots is here journalist shot with a whopping great ruby necklace in the window or horse is a captain Jules

is just a thing in these uncertain times so he goes that sure brings out the

necklace the captain takes one look at it in a moment later out.we comes with a booty spell work nice but of breaking it

treated armed robbery robbery nothing masturbate EEPROM he will pay for it the

captain's sudden decision to quit piracy and go straight came as a rude shock to the Pirates but there was no doubt about

it his mind was made up weigh the anchor Tom we're about to set sail on an honest

trading expedition hey Cappy Cappy with

an upright citizen like me watch if I

done robbed a poor innocent tradesman by the sound of it stringer rube is wasn't it you said hey

grant it from me with menaces by a pirate that he is nonsense rubbish I paid for it right where is it now

galloping crow fish it's gone huh so you bidding today you can drop that anchor

again boy you're staying here captain while we search the ship

so Tom led the anchor down again the officer and his men began their search of the ship

first they frisked every member of the crew hey I'm ticklish

then they said about the ship itself

they searched every drawer every locker every nook and cranny in the captain's cabin

they looked under the bunks and in the bus and got quite a few surprises but

there was no sign of the necklace oh dear careful there the ring dogfish ah I

don't even know where it is myself they searched every stitch of the rigging in the sails [Music]

serves you right bloomin landlubber they examined all the cannons oh they searched the inmost quarters of

the ship they explore the powder magazine they rummage through the ship's

stores they gutted the galley but they

couldn't find that ruby necklace anywhere ship suitably sir not a ruby in sight sir but like Matlock it must be

somewhere very well captain either you've thrown it overboard or this fellas lying

you better be off back to the shore man and the soldiers rode back the way

they'd come leaving a very disgruntled captain behind them I don't know my first honest act in a lifetime and

look what happens I pay for the necklace and it vanishes any of you know where it is

haven't a clue Cappy go me cross Bjork Cappy captain I Bisbee steviesteveo juicybar

know very well the way the anchor again Tom there's no point in staying yeah

righty-h* Cap'n only I'll tell you one thing the ntral way a bit more than it

did last time see what I mean w*r look at that

the puppet how on earth easy cap you dropped him and I picked him up hung

them on the anchor before I let it go and there they are where our boat um the football that'll teach them but even so

if that's the best treatment an honest man can expect I'm taking to piracy

again

well we are small there's a billion bald aftershave spray please master mate any

well kipping some lads bust me hat trimmed already Cap'n how's that sword

coming on fire five of us nicely thank you Cathy hey shiny glass capping

I am busy Lancer Jewish sauce for the pirate of the Year contest 1775 that

[Music]

evening the light shone brightly in the waterfront in where the pirate of the year show is being heard Tom had to wait

outside but within all was festivity and mirth the captain was jubilant for as it

turned out he was the only contestant and the award was automatically his it's

obvious that I'm the bravest most successful and of course most handsome Buccaneer effect there was I believe

some mention of that old ruffian cutthroat Jake but no doubt he thought better of it and if therefore gives me

great pleasure to accept this handsome oh no you don't accept nothing of the

kind you old scallywag come on out all that's all of you except for you captain

and that crummy old crew yarn there our swords will soon see whose pirate of the

year [Music]

I ain't got all night [Music]

not you we must keep the numbers e-even mustn't

we or it wouldn't be fair now I got you a

water now who's that pirate of them yeah

hey which reminds me there were some little matter the ploys weren't there oh yes

very handsome in the absence of all other competitors I hereby proclaims

myself pirate of the air stay where you are condemned out of your own mouth

arrest there's men no nonsense not this way full mean and by the riot and as

Jake and his crew were marched off to the jailhouse Captain Pugwash was even more pleased with himself than usual

after all as he himself remarked it's quite something to win the cup twice in

ten minutes hey me hearty

[Music]

easy when you know how it was a clear

moonlit night and the black piglet anchor beside the deserted pier down below in their bunks the crew had but

one topic of conversation that machine all that money I just can't get over it

nor be neither partly proper fantastically should I calls it he puts

in one coin and bingo outcomes hundreds yeah we could do with one of their

machines aboard this ship I reckon

and by morning as the ship left port the captain had a cunning plan

wakey-wakey rise and shine all hands on deck ah there you are lucky lads every

one of you just see what your generous captain has procured for you Oh

we'll all giver it's the magic money machine yeah now all we need is something to put in it never fear your

captain thinks of everything it's paper aid today have to give him

something you see to start the ball rolling ah yes master mentor one golden crown

for you you old bat obliged I'm sure captain generous ready one golden crown

for you will it and one for you pirate be blimey

nothing yeah there there master mates we can't all win all the time you know yeah

can't we just you wait

yeah so that's how it is Oh show you let

me have a go but Willie did know better

than the others the Pirates blood was up

by half they picked up their precious savings and tied again and again but the money machine swallowed everything only

the captain seemed happy and that night

the feeling in the crew's quarters was very different it's a bloomin swindle that's what if we

pity what I put aside go forever just think of it all our lovely money all our

lovely and it's still in the machine what are we waiting for

careful cabbage cabbage it's your leaf dumb yeah Oh what am i oh no it's okay

well of course it's empty the captain's got the key Agathe yes and he cleared it before he went to bed wide a rotten

dirty thieving treacherous double-dealing shifty swindling barefaced trickster come on wake up you

old crook you BOTS Norfolk you're coming with us no no stop it I'll give it all back

[Applause] poor captain poor Fiddlesticks he Denis

Denis and he woke to us again Willie Willie no but it does seem a bit hard I

know tell you something you know what's going over next if we don't get our money back

not the Machine this time oh no it'll be you captain

oh I'm the bravest ballet and cupcake is

nowhere near palpable do ballet when I'm around agree you must

hello Balu Balu ballet you won't see Pororo Jake but I love nowhere near a

won't see me for dust will ye well I mere now you old scallywag and you know

what the likes of me does to the like see you we make sure walk the plank feed

you to the fishes a go on rummage for a plank one away now Tom the cabin boy had

been watching all this going on and when he saw what was happening he decided to climb down into Jake's longboat where he

couldn't be seen but could hear what was going on on deck yes I do nicely nice it

down to the deck over there right now wish me be first ever bent a nice little

walk for you me old fatty mate oh yeah well yes chef there take e---coli

captain Jake here the only amber you'd be feet you cannot can't yeah oh yeah come on I'll count to

10 before I fires this g*n one two three

four five six seven eight nine oh yeah

yes yeah I beat you know I'll be sure

[Applause] and who's next for the aya jumpy come on

Willie lad you are but yeah I can't go by myself me legs

ah well it'll have to be a three-legged race won't it one two three four five

six seven six five fella

no adult four five six seven eight nine and now for the star turn your own your

very own the one and only come on you old rogue you but I really must die I

mean feeling shy are we maybe we all ought to count this time one two three

four five six seven right me Anselm's

let's take a look and see what's left of him jealous

[Applause] [Music]

let me a sword captain girls see no sign of them captain Jake no sank like stones

I don't doubt boy they was ever enough

[Applause] and now perhaps we can get on with our

singing practice Amy hotties

things is getting outta mind aboard this ship my answers life is becoming impossible aboard our

ship me hearties we got so much loot and booty aboard there's no room to swing a

cat nine tails the reps are rotten the sales are seedy and we're right out

of supplies there's only one thing for it we need another ship - pirates with only

one thought to capture another ship and even as they thought it they saw each

other a ship the ship Stan - oh the CRO oh I can't be a sail by Neptune call up

your shipmates Oh your cousin Jake lie low me hearties they'll take us for an

ordinary ship until we're alongside keep down normally they'll wreck where a

law-abiding craft till we Bardem I hope they were really fighting huh but we

must be ready for the worst just wait till we get some Sarge there a TV bully boys right said roll call so we come

alongside right centre out cause we come a fresh summer now we all hide ourselves

in the stern so that the ship looks deserted we're live wait in the boughs beyond

summers they'll think there's no one aboard someone's got a nasty surprise

coming to them someone's got an article shot on the way part might off they're

making right on us it's too good to be true they're coming straight towards us don't seem to be no one about this

sleeping off they're off dinners I dare say looks curiously deserted taking this

yesterday I expect it'll be nine perfect

for boarding we'll come back alongside er Stern [Music]

couldn't be better we shall be able to step straight aboard about

[Music] stand by the board is falling off the

plank we go below and Russell out the crew splendid splendid the vessel is

olives me hearties there Liz shuddering sharks my own ship is drifting away just

as well captain look who's aboard over there see cutthroat jaqen company they boarded us

when we boarded them hopping mad by the look of it and I'm not surprised come

back I have cut you to pieces I'll split you to smithereens

you can't the ship I even say were they unless no cannibals - pudding cannon

never mind captain this ship's got everything you could possibly want on it cannons powder shot provisions a

treasure glory behold whoopee very nice kappa you definitively

got the best the bargain I certainly did masturbate and of course as we all well

know their exchange is no robbery Amy hotties

[Music]

you

the tension is me hearties we are about to set forth on a great voyage of discovery hey Willy

a journey pirate William to find new lands beyond the sea I have here a map

fat low you say is is nothing or it precisely pirate Barnabas how can there

be anything on it when we haven't discovered it yet the day of the

captain's departure had come and a great crowd at a symbol to say goodbye to their hero even the mayor of the port

was there we'll saw we bid farewell to our heroic friends may good fortune tend

their intrepid at the place I Thank You

mr. mayor I'll be glad of the fortune on my return farewell

so the black pig set forth frequency for the first day or so all went well and

down in his cabin hogwash recorded in his lock already I feel as one of the

great Explorer dauntless and doggy Cappy

Cappy haitian-american yeah I mean inherited I hate dirty great black clouds plundering prophecies

Master mate what matter it

yes sir well maybe I don't feel quite so thoughtless and doggy does whoops

the tempest rage for two days and nights huge waves rose like mountains and the

ship was tossed high and low like an egg ship the captain managed at last to get to his cabin and took to his bed in

great alarm and the crew did likewise feeling very seasick only Tom stayed at

the wheel and kept the ship headed into the wind

then on the third day the wind dropped as suddenly as it had begun and there was the black pig drifting slowly on a

calm sea land ahoy all hands on deck

there you are me hearties what did I tell you the strange new land I oh come

off it cabin you know that coastline as well as I do hey there's the beach where he goes

battling him yes yeah it's actually a hope or cubby view now dear Mia I do

believe your writer and nautical knockings oh no the mayor and all better they've come out to meet us but we ate

discovered nothing don't worry take the ship into Harbor where's that map captain

[Music]

welcome home captain

anno tell us of the strange new lands you have discovered yes yeah well it's

yeah here you are carried oh well yes it's a jumping jellyfish well I never

why of course yes it's here well splendid captain aha that's all I

need it is a proud moment for us all so I appoint you a freeman of this port and

hereby decree free civic festivities for a week

[Applause] hello Americans it'll take me at least a

week to recover

I see all I have to do is to pick up

those four barrels of French brandy from the key side at midnight sail them across the channel deliver them on the

English coast as his address and I will receive 500 crowns precisely

it's a deal till midnight then ha ha ha ha ha nice work Frenchy boy only it

won't be brandy what's in them casks with it it will not yuck too kind the

captain called smuggling was a new

adventure for Captain Pugwash but as his ship left the little French port in the moonlight and began the channel crossing

he felt well pleased the four great brandy barrels have been safely loaded

and stowed in the hole the crew were fast asleep in their quarters while up in his cabin the captain enjoyed his

nightcap money for old rope hey Tom Oh should I say old brandy but you better

take a look below they'll see those costs to secure my cabin all right open

up me Anselm's here is what we're going to do we waits till we're well out to sea and they all be snore in their fat

heads off then we have an atom and Chuck's emitted mincemeat and we takes

over the ship there's stronger stuff in these air casks then ever all Pugwash dreamed of

ash batten down all of you there's someone coming everything shipshape down

there aye aye captain but some of the floor planks are loose I'm just gonna nail him down

but of course it wasn't the planks that tom was nailing and the point was the

Jake and his men thought it was the planks until it came to their turn to be

nailed in and then it was too late a few

hours later the black pig was nosing into the little English Cove where Pugwash was to deliver the brandy the

smugglers rest hmm that must be it up there take the barrels of Shaw me

hearties so far so good and now up the clip path with them and

quiet as the grave we must not disturb the excise men quiet

Willie boy yourself I didn't make no noise silence master mate but in utter

defeat c*ptive over here very peculiar

[Music] straight in watch em wait for it lads

what who goes there oh caught red-handed rascally smugglers

every one of your I'll put your barrels down and your hands up mm-hmm yes ah randhir by the look of it you're under

arrest please so we're not smugglers we've captured two notorious pirates in those barrels and two more down on the beach

pirates fiddlesticks never heard such a tale in me by Thunder maybe the boys

right open them up by its cutthroat

chick one of the most infamous villains on the coast take him away and open up the others as

for you sir I owe you an apology oh not at all ayah and what is more a

substantial sum of money there's a reward of a thousand crowns on that Rosco's head free as an eel and

dangerous as a devil how you caught him frankly beats me and frankly if you

really want to know it beats me too

hey Willie boy you're supposed to be peeling spuds in the galley the capital

B ah be mad if he catches you Skylark watch it here he comes I wrote William how often do I have to

tell you that suffering seagulls why didn't I think of it before Willie you're a genius you've given me

the very idea I was looking for a stone

a crow's nest windows is shattered very upset baking I'm sure pirate be

Willie you want to be ashamed of yourself what's he up to date is making

Semitic itchy watch out he's coming

careful now easy does it remember this is the greatest invention since the wheel put

it down on the deck oh dear whatever if you better go to dad this time captain hey a kite precisely Willie but this is

no ordinary kite it is a kite of design to carry a man high above the masthead let me explain

in the ordinary way one can only see a few miles from the crow's nest but with

this monster kites floating high above the ship we shall be able to see for miles spot enemy ships long before they

see us and pounce on them and aware it's the sensation of the century

oh yeah but how'd you take off in the first place air currents private Barnabas the forward motion of the ship

the upward movement of the breeze are simple when you have an education like mine right now who's going up first

gibbering killifish where are they all done it looks like it's gonna be you captain dull very well master baiter

wherever you are I Walter the weather forecast yeah Oh aye captain techies yeah yes

captain yeah hello bear yeah is the shipping forecast weeds fresh too strong

and variable oh well that's all I need master mater I'm Tom to the poop deck and carefully very soon all was ready

Pugwash sat in his kite while Willy stood by on the winch prepare for

takeoff Marcel me hearties full speed ahead aye aye captain full speed ease and by

the way [Music]

movie is fantastic I only hire high cap

date just think of it I could be free free to

ante again could be free I said could be free he could be free I I

copied here we go oh yeah let's caught

it [Music]

[Applause] it's alright we carry cat cheek but well

hurry up them of the water it's wet staggering starfish so right captain we

got the kite yeah the same size to the century couldn't risk losing not high the

greatest invention suits the wheel the flu oh don't worry catchy we'll come

back for you later [Music]

we kept heed wake up just look at their bird really master mate but we are

pirates not bird watchers suffering seagulls what no I - ego nor suffering

happy that their bird is a dodo rubbish Fiddlesticks everybody knows the dodo is extinct died

out years ago no Eric didn't or this year far flung Hilliard Ocean Highland

the dodo is not dead you realize what

this means my heart is the whole world thinks the dodo is extinct if we could capture this little lass and take them

home our fortune would be made Oh first catch your dodo Cappy but captain

hey I'll catch one watch but captain Claire top so I've done it

stare that's what come back Willie but if you take all these Dodos away they

really will die out rubbish Hamid no no Willie I have a far better plan we will

build a trap a dodo trap Oh to work me hearties

[Music]

we'll have it there under that tree Oh aye captain sir and what should we use

to bait the trap Joe that's kept you I know Dodos adore do ducks splendid

splendid me hearties bait in position Master mate or our deck right now we shall all hide in the tree

over the trap and watch as the Dodos fly into it but captain they'll stop butting

Tom you just lie low below and keep hot

[Music] now for the Dodos hey I could do with

one of those Duke fire Willie what's that probably the mother dodo according it's

it's a I was trying to tell you captain

Dodos can't fly anyway even if Pirates can downwards though don't don't don't

don't don't stand there chattering Tom get us out of here so Tom set to work to get the Pirates

out of their own xoda trap they were all tired and very hungry by the time they'd finished and as Tom rode them all back

that evening to the black pig the Dodos watched and wondered what these curious creatures were we'll all have supper in

bed tonight Tom and mind it's a good one we shall need all our strength if we are to hunt the dodo the more successful

area tomorrow aye aye captain so Tom gave them all a huge supper of

donuts soaked in rum all the doughnuts they hadn't used for the dodo trap and

the Pirates slept far more deeply than they'd ever meant to in fact the next day they overslept for hours while Tom's

sail the ship was far away from the island of the Dodos as he possibly could

all hands on deck Oh hands on deck fall in for the dodo hunt

Toto's captain what are you talking about there aren't any Dodos in the middle of the ocean buh-buh-buh-buh-buh but the island those

birds where are they you must have been dreaming captain we're nowhere near land and as the crew

were all far too sleepy to remember anything the captain gave up a black pig continued her voyage over the wide

Indian Ocean the Dodos continued to live peacefully on their Island for all we

know they may still be there

[Music] here they comes me hansoms I don't know

why we bother to come ashore and this didn't a large joint hi give me the I seize any day

please note to do here ah we'll give him some it to do and all

[Music] [Applause]

[Music]

[Music]

[Laughter]

they masturbate we'll be right behind you captain save me hearties look over

there the theater we'll get inside hide among the audience boo boo boo boo boo ain't got no tickets

we'll make for the side door hurry but

but where's the audience stuttering starfish we're on the stage

but captain I tell you it's the safest place but the puh-puh-puh buh-buh-buh do

anything dance listen I'll give you a tune right here goes here comes shake

tell him a joke or something oh yes masturbator what's the difference

between a cannonball and a cauliflower did you joke now uh I'm sure kappa i

said you are shopping you say stop

pushing they're not not Willy who's there me me you mean to say you don't

recognize me damn sir you're spoiling

the show I say I say I say what do I say Tom you say run for it captain run for

it

where are they which way did they go I am spreading up faces I

[Music]

you're all under arrest a lot of you for the serious breach of public peace and order

take them away oh yes sounds as though

they're still enjoying themselves and if ever we can't make a living as pirates

we'll know what to do eh me hearties

[Music]

splendid our trials well completed we may now proceed to action right me

hearties our ship is here concealed from the island by those high rocks behind us on the highest point of the island

cutthroat Jake is encamped with the greatest hoard of treasure in history at dawn tomorrow when the tide is high and

put the water shallow enough to walk through we saw dawn our monstrous disguise and advance upon the foe

they'll be terrified of course abandon the treasure take to their ship and the booty will be ours we shall be rich as

kings thanks to the Marquand and man man do it yourself a sea monster all was

quiet at door next day Jake and his men slept on their treasure while Captain

Pugwash formed up his team for the attack tail man will it present captain humph men matin Barnabas frigate captain

and myself of costs at the head [Music]

my agent I'm a monster oh it's coming ashore little though you numbskull you

I'll teach you to creep in catfish he's right it's coming closer they'll be

alive run for it run all of you and a

moment later Jake and his crew are dashing in terror from their encampment while on the other side of the island

the monster was arriving bit by bit on the beach it's worked its work see

they've abandoned their position a fall at midnight is to the treasurer

lolloping landlubbers just look at that loot gold silver treasure chests both

ears are not booty there to bury a brontosaurus very read about a boo boo captured but a cat key where's Willie

what about Willie there is still in his tail take it off Willie stop here Willie

heel this way Willie oh dear he do look

a bit peculiar dokey now all the time that Willie was running about Jake and his men were on their way

back to their ship by all the demons of

the deep what's that I see a tail by thunder but by itself where's the rest

of it but why curses Pugwash and his crew we've been through it Oh Willie at last I the tale always come

last didn't it man the cannons will blast him off the face of the island then go back for the

loot but meanwhile attracted by the sight of the mock sea monster a real sea monster

huge hairy and horrible was approaching the scene girl come on Jake look what's

arrived Fermi skull and crossbones we're foiled again boy stall sale full speed away oh

look at that then that'll keep her Jake busy for a while and we'd better hurry

away before the monster comes back for its second costs yeah but uh what we

gonna use to carry this little lot off then I he made daily gosh and so as Jake

ship fled from the jaws of the sea monster the Pirates loaded up the treasure into Willie's tail and then set off back to

their ship in triumph hey just wait till I get back to Wigan I won't have a tale

to tell always was a bit of a wag

in court the gentlemen of the jury you have heard the case against this

notorious pirate this vile criminal whose very existence is a threat to the

safety of respectable law-abiding citizens such as yourselves and house a

UN is the prisoner guilty or by some improbable chance not guilty guilty

bloat a very guilty indeed Horatio Pavo

you have been rightly found guilty of the unspeakable crime of piracy and I

have much pleasure in sentencing you to have your head chopped off tomorrow morning at 7:00 precisely on chopping

block Hill and a jolly good riddance too next case please poor Captain Pugwash his crimes had

indeed caught up with him and onboard the black appeal there he goes give Archie db2 the jailhouse yeah

I used for the chop my first thing tomorrow hey there much good at getting up in morning oh and he weren't much of a

captain either but he's the only one we've got goodness what a lot of long faces nobody's getting a chop his head off

listen and as Tom explained his plan the Pirates realized that there was hope

after all [Music]

and at 6 o'clock next morning hany

century quick the president pushes trying to escape into the moat yeah what sir where or can't see nothing down there

why do I know you young varmints always

[Music]

an hour later the church clock struck seven and all the tongues for up early making their way to chopping block hill

to witness the end of Captain Pugwash then out of the prison gates at the other end of the town came the condemned

man and his escort the wretched captain

was so frightened that he kept his eyes tight shut in sheer terror I wish I'd

stopped to dry land what have I done to

deserve this maybe if I'd be more generous with me cruel shared out the

booty in fact the captain was feeling so

miserable that he didn't notice that they were going downhill not up and when he did start to go up he thought it was

on to the scaffold no no no please I'll

be good I'll go straight I'll come off it gamine you'll be cooking in than ever when you see where

you are please sorry captain aboard your own ship he won't forget that bit about

where shoes where all of us quick get underway before the crowd sees what's happened and very soon the ship was

sailing out of the harbor with Captain Pugwash at the wheel thought they could chop my head off indeed but I was too

clever for him kept me head in more ways than one a Tom but Tom was watching the

angry crowd on the key side and he said nothing as a ship gathered speed on another voyage to strange lands and even

stranger adventures

[Music] [Applause] [Music]