02x18 - The Temp/Parent Trap

[bunniefuu]

- ♪

- [doorbell rings]

- KIDS: Trick or treat!

- Nice try, guys, but you can't
trick or treat your own house.

- Why not?
- It's in the Halloween bylaws.

That's why.

- Oh, sounds like someone
wants his house egged.

- Sounds like someone
wants to spend

tomorrow cleaning eggs.
- Oh, touché.

Anyway, let's get to
the important stuff.

Look at this haul!

And best of all... no apples!

- Oh, I got a rock.

Oh, wait, no, it's a candy bar

that fell out of its wrapper.

[teeth chomp]

Oh, no, it's a rock.

- Dave, it's a new record...

thanks in large part
to Miss Kroner.

- Oh, don't tell me you took
advantage of her again.

- Dave, it's not like it's my
fault she's got a bad memory.

- [doorbell rings]

- KIDS: Trick or treat!

- Why are you at my house?

I have nothing here
you could possibly want.

- Just some Halloween candy,
'cause that's the day it is.

- Oh, yes, of course.

Why didn't you say so?

- KIDS: Thank you!

- And a second helping of trick
or treat in three... two... one.

- [doorbell rings]

- KIDS: Trick or treat!

- Why are you at my house?

- Are you sure she's
not tricking you?

- Oh, please, Dave.

- Oh, I feel bad.

- Yeah, bad enough not
to eat the candy?

- No.

- MAN ON TV: Stay with me
or the werewolves outside

will get you.
- THEODORE: [gasps]

- MAN ON TV: [evil laughter]
- Too scary.

- But, Dave, it's Halloween,

and in ancient Greek,
Halloween means scary is good.

- No, it doesn't.

Okay, now, come on, off to bed.

- Oh, we never get to
do anything scary.

Theodore, stop worrying.

No one's going to
take your candy.

- I'm not worried
about you guys.

I'm worried about
the Switch Witch.

- [electricity zapping]

- The who? The what?

- You know...

♪ Switch Witch

♪ She's gonna come

♪ She's gonna come

♪ For your candy

- I've never heard of her.

- The Switch Witch.

She switches all the candy
you get for Halloween

with books and fruit.

- What?!

- Theodore, there's
no Switch Witch.

Hey!
- Ow!

- Dave said no candy
till morning.

- I was merely looking
for rocks.

- [birds twittering]

- Yes!
- Oh!

Let the great candy trade begin!

- ALL: What?

- Books and fruit?
[gasps]

- Guys, someone took
all our candies

and replaced them with...
- We know!

- ALL: [chattering]

- Order! Order!
- [duck squeaks]

- Order!
- Oh!

- Listen up, people.

All right, now obviously
we've all been victims

of a terrible crime.

Now when candy is
taken away from you,

in just the moment you can taste
it in your little mouth,

well, it's not a feeling
any of us will soon forget.

But we must turn our
attention to the culprit.

- [door knob rattling]

- It's the Switch Witch.

- Hey, what's goin'
on down here?

- Here's a question:
What are you eating?

- Oh, he's eating candy.

- Where'd you get
the candy, Dave?

- Yeah, 'cause I had
candy just like that.

- [gasps] Maybe the Switch Witch

has switched with Dave's body.

- Guys, stop, okay?

This was left over
from the candy

I handed out
to the trick or treaters.

- KIDS: [gasping]
There's more candy?

- [gasping]
- No!

- Books and fruit again?

Dave, this is going to go
a lot easier for you,

if you'd just tell us the truth.

What did you and the Switch
Witch do with our candy?

- I don't know what you're
talking about.

I'll be upstairs.

- Okay, now, we know for sure
there's a Switch Witch.

We just don't know who.

- Well, then, there's
only one thing we need.

- Epsom salts and sauerkraut?
- Uh, no.

- Epsom salts and sauerkraut?

Jeanette, name one instance
where those two things

would be at all helpful.

- Guys, guys, come on, focus.

We need to catch a witch
and how do we do that?

We trap her...
with a witch trap.

- All right, guys, so, gather

everything you think
will attract a witch.

That way, we bring
the witch to us.

- ♪ Come out come out
wherever you are ♪

♪ Why do you run from me

♪ And take what you
want from me ♪

♪ You got me chasing you
around and around ♪

♪ Yeah

♪ I don't know what to do

♪ I just wanna be with you

♪ Oh what will happen

♪ Are they bad things or...

♪ I don't know, I don't know

♪ But maybe you know

♪ I don't know, I don't know

♪ But maybe you know

- [crow cawing]

- Possible witch approaching.

I repeat, a possible
witch approaching.

- Nope. No. That would be
Cheesy, Theodore.

- I cannot confirm
that at this moment.

- Theodore,
it's definitely Cheesy.

- He's approaching
the witch trap.

On three, two...

- Oh, sweet, sauerkraut
and Epsom salts.

These are like
my favorite things.

Hey, is this a garage sale?

- Cheesy, get off our lawn.

- Can I take the Epsom salts
and sauerkraut?

- Uh, no.

- It's not for you.

- Oh, okay.

I guess I'll just
take the candy.

Bye, losers!

- [foot thuds]
- Oh!

Oh. Oh.

- I don't think it's working.

Not one witch.

- Looking for witches, are you?
- KIDS: [scream]

- You might want to try
check in on old Miss Miller.

- [gasping] Miss Miller?

- Why look so surprised?

In the meanwhile,
I'll help myself

to the Epsom salts
and sauerkraut.

- Hey, hey, wait.
Hold on a second.

Why did you say Miss Miller?

Why did she say Miss Miller?

- ♪ Come over to
my house my house ♪

♪ I'm gonna give you candy

- KIDS: Nah.

- ♪ Come over to
my house, my house ♪

♪ I'm gonna give you candy
- KIDS: Nah.

- She's not the Switch Witch.

- But why would Miss Kroner
tell us to look at Miss Miller,

when clearly she's
not the Switch Witch?

- To deflect us.
- Yes. Yes, exactly.

We must have been getting
too close and she knew it.

Oh, she's the witch.

- But we don't have
a shred of proof.

- [apple thuds]

- [gasps] It's a sign
from Paul Newman.

- It's not Paul Newman, Alvin,
it's Isaac Newton.

- Oh, whatever.
- [apple thuds]

- If she already had the candy,
then why would she...

- Simon, to throw
us off the track.

I mean, do I have to
lay everything

out for you on a silver platter?

Well, I don't know
about the rest of you,

but I, for one, am not
going to stand for this.

Listen, go up there and demand
she return our candy.

- Uh... no.

- All right, fine.

Theodore, you go get it.

- [gasps] No.

- All right, Simon, you know,

show him how to do it,
would you?

- Uh, well, Alvin,
since you're not going

to Stanford, you should go.

- Oh, fine.

It looks like it's
up to me... again.

- ♪

- [step creaks]

- ♪

- THEODORE: [screams]

[muffled screaming]

- Switch Witch.

I'm going to come...
I'm going to come...

for your candy.

[cackling laughter]

[laughter echoing]

- I told you guys
she's the Switch Witch.

She's obviously headed
to our candy stash.

Come on, let's follow her.

- Into the woods?

- What choice do we have?

- Yeah, we've gotta get
our candy back.

- ♪

- [owl hooting]

- [creature howling]

- [bird screeching]

- KIDS: [gasp]
- Look!

- Oh, okay.

Well, I'm ready to go home now.

I'm trying to eat
healthier anyway.

I don't even like
candy that much.

- KIDS: Yeah, we're good.
Let's go.

- Yeah, yeah, candy
is really overrated.

- All right, guys,
now let's... let's,

you know, get a little
backbone here.

If we all go together,
as a team, we'll be fine.

- Against the Switch Witch?
Are you crazy?

- Look, Simon, we're on
a very slippery slope here.

You know, I mean, one day,
it's our candy,

the next, it's our bikes.

I say it ends here.

- He's right.

- ♪

- [doorknob squeaking]

- KIDS: [gasping]
- No! No!

- Put it back!

- I'm sorry. I'm trying.

- [door creaks open]

- Who goes there?

- Um, no... nobody.

- What do you mean "nobody"?

- W-We just w-want
our c-c-candy.

- Just... just some of it.

Like, uh, maybe half?

- Oh, you do, do you?

- KIDS: [scream]

- Well, let me tell you
what I have to say to that!

- [Dave's body thuds]

- KIDS: [screaming]

- Well, you said you wanted
Halloween to be more scary.

- [light switch clicks]

- Here you go.
- KIDS: [gasping]

- MISS KRONER: I guess
you can't have Halloween

without a little candy.

But if you really want a treat,

read those books!

- KIDS: [chattering]

- I've always wanted to jump
into a pile of candy.

Oh!

Owww...

I'm okay.

I was just kidding when
I said I didn't love candy.

Oh, I love it so much.

- Dave, that was the most
amazing Halloween trick ever.

- Thanks, Alvin.

- But, but, Dave,
next year, we should,

you know, amp it up.

I'll help you really
scare these guys.

You know, like scar
them for life kinda stuff.

- Uh, no, no, Alvin.
You know, I really don't...

- Dave, Dave, trust me.

We've gotta bring in some crazy
clowns and... and then we'll...

- Alvin.

- But, Dave, have you ever
seen "Halloween Horror"

or... or
"It's Coming For You"?

- DAVE: Alvinnn!