08x03 - Cat’s Out of the Birkin Bag

[bunniefuu]

["That's Our Style" by West Rose plays]

♪ Ready, go ♪

♪ That's our style ♪

♪ That's our style ♪

-[Chelsea] God, who's that sexy b*tch?
-Hello!

-I was like, we got a new agent?
-[Chrishell] Stop!

Nicole Scherzinger and her Pussycat Dolls
just walked in right now.

[Chrishell] Nicole Scherzinger was
G's g*y awakening. [laughs]

-So I'll take that compliment! Thank you.
-[Emma] Yes!

-[chuckles] Oh my God.
-[Amanza] Let me guess.

-You guys just saw each other yesterday.
-[Brett] Yeah, exactly.

I know. [chuckles]

["That's Our Style" continues]

♪ Tapped in my energy ♪

♪ Indigo like here we go ♪

-Hello.
-[Jason] Hey, Alanna.

Hi, darling.

-[Alanna] Hi, everyone.
-[Chrishell] Hi!

[song ends]

Jason, did you end up talking to Bre?

Yes, we worked things out.

-Oh my God, that's so great.
-[mellow music plays]

-What are you doing for your birthday?
-I'm having a party.

-Didn't you guys get my message?
-I know, but what... what are you doing?

DJ, food.
I'm gonna have, I think, a tooth gem lady.

Shut up.

Amanza's Black don't crack birthday.
[laughs]

-Still Black, not on crack.
-[Amanza] Still Black, not on crack.

I've invited everyone in our office,
but it's been days now.

I sent the text. Maybe...
I don't know if they're getting it.

But I'm getting anxiety because nobody
said they're coming to my birthday party.

Are you guys gonna come to my birthday?

I'm alive!

[laughing] What's a girl gotta do?

Three, four, previous agent...

-Yeah.
-...were in escrow at 2.995.

-[Jason] Yeah.
-[Chrishell] Cute.

That's cute. Want me to take it?
I have a good angle.

-[Emma] Oh yeah!
-Effortless.

[Emma] Okay.

This is way better because it's cute.
Okay. It's really zoomed out.

-You want it like that, right?
-Yeah.

[both scream]

-Wait, what? What? Did I flash you?
-[Jason] Jesus.

-[Alanna] What happened?
-Jeez, sorry.

-Chrishell's full nipple just came out.
-That was the most glorious thing.

No!

I'm definitely getting to know these girls
on a more intimate level.

This is not
your average real estate agency.

Absolutely not.

[Chelsea] My God, now I'm a bit hot.

-[Chrishell laughing] Oh my God.
-Not in the naughty schoolgirl outfit!

Chrishell!

-[Jason] Can you do what you did again?
-[laughing] Shut up!

[Emma] Jason changed the office rules.

Anytime anyone needs to speak,
they need to raise their hand.

-No!
-[Emma] Chrishell!

[Jason and Emma laugh]

Okay, that's enough.
Back to work, everyone!

Chrishell, can you get... can you get this
for me please?

-[Chelsea] I got it!
-[Emma laughs]

I don't necessarily think
we need to have a strict dress code.

But at this point,

I think I've seen as much as Jason has
of some of these ladies.

All right. Ladies, ladies, team meeting.

[upbeat music plays]

[Chrishell] Oh, that smells so good.
I should've made one of those. Oh!

-Oh, I'm sorry.
-[both laughing]

[Emma] I wasn't trying to cop a feel.

Right, we've got a lot to go over.

That guy's walked
back and forth, like, three times.

Oh my God, stop it.

Okay, fine, I... Guys.
Emma, Chelsea, Alanna.

Please? Thanks.

-Already getting in trouble, I love it.
-[Jason] Let's start with you ladies.

Alanna, since you're the new lady,
we'll start with you.

Well, first of all,
I'm very excited to be here.

I've been in touch with the landscapers
for the Hollywood Boulevard listing.

So I've got the ball rolling there.

I'm ready for the pressure,

and, you know, I'm ready to take that on

and hopefully do
a really good job for you.

-Not hopefully, you will. You need to.
-I will.

This is incredibly important. Alright.

Failure is not an option
on a house like this,

especially not with these clients,

and there is absolutely
no more room for error on this project.

So yeah, I'm taking a risk with Alanna,
but she's very competent,

she has great taste,
and I have a lot of confidence in her.

[Jason] And great job, Mary and Chelsea,
on the Manhattan Beach broker's open.

That was a huge success.

-Yeah.
-[all applauding]

And we've also had
a good last couple weeks.

We just closed last week
on a 25-million-dollar property, uh,

in Newport Beach.

I finally sold Orlando Bloom's house
for seven million,

which took me a while, in Trousdale.

This was a flip Orlando Bloom and I did.
It was a real challenge.

We had to lease it for a few years,
but we finally sold it.

-[Chrishell] Show me around.
-Yeah, you got it. This is the main area.

So that... The house is from the '50s.

-[Chrishell] Oh. That's from the '50s?
-And they left that sunken living room.

This is what we want this year.

-20, 30, 40.
-[Chrishell] Ring the bell!

-I'm not ringing it.
-[Alanna] Come on.

What will it take
for you to ring the bell?

Okay, fine. If I sell something over 40,
I'll ring the bell.

-[Emma] Okay.
-How about if you date someone over 40?

[all laughing]

That was your best one so far.

It seems like we've gotten back
to some level of normalcy

and family environment here.

So we intend to keep that
with you as well.

So let's please do so.

If no one has any grievances to air,

then I'll just assume
everything is copacetic.

I'm definitely quite upset
about Mary calling me out

in front of Brett and Jason
at our broker's open,

but this is not the time nor the place.

I'm going to keep it professional
and keep my emotions in check.

Well, anyway,
my birthday party is on Tuesday.

[women] Whoo!

So if you guys are coming, RSVP please,
'cause I want everybody there.

-I'll be there.
-You said yes.

Yes. I will be there.

[Amanza] Don't know about you,
but it'll be fun.

-Yummy cake.
-[Brett] I'll be there.

I'm almost over the hill,
so I don't know how many more I'll have.

-[laughing]
-[Chrishell] Don't say that.

-Okay! Awesome.
-We're good then?

We Gucci, baby.

-Yeah. Whoo!
-[Jason] All right, guys. Good jobs.

[Amanza] Whoo.

[Nicole] Okay.

[Chelsea] ♪ Cupid! ♪

[Emma] We got that.

-I'm gonna do my Googles, I'll be back.
-[Emma chuckles]

[Chrishell] Amanza.

Is your stylist
coming to your birthday party?

-[Amanza] Yeah.
-[Chrishell] Okay.

But I literally told him today, do not...

-Like, just stay out of...
-No, he's super h*m*

and attacked me and G.

-I'm not gonna be in the same room as him.
-But he's g*y.

-Amanza, you saw what he said.
-[tense music plays]

I feel like I've made
a lot of, you know, headway with Amanza

in my relationship with her,

but I am just a little nervous
to go to her birthday,

to be in the same room
with the stylist that she worked with,

just because he was upset
that I corrected him,

stating he was a stylist for me.

So then he went on a very public rant.

Just saying that I'm a fake l*sbian,
that I'm nothing but a green card to G,

saying that, you know,
I gotta get some d*ck in my hole.

Like, what does this
even have to do with G?

And everyone's like, "Oh, but he's g*y."

Does that excuse any of those comments?

No, it makes it worse, to be honest.

He's showed me what was written,

and then said that other people
chimed in and that...

No, he literally posted it. He said it.

-Alright, well, then...
-It's from his mouth.

And he attacked G, said it was...
G was just after a green card.

-That I'm a fake l*sbian, that I...
-To be fair, I've had...

The fact that you still employ him is...

To be honest, like, right now...

[chuckling] ...he helps me for free,
and I haven't...

I don't have anybody else right now and...

-Our relationship has always been decent.
-He said more than that.

-But... I don't know...
-You've seen it.

But I don't...
I thought he called you a fake l*sbian.

I didn't know he attacked G
and, like, did all this other stuff.

-It was all made public, I can show you.
-I believe you.

I don't know.

I mean, I definitely don't want to support
somebody that's gonna bash somebody...

-You already are.
-...and then he went into...

Well, I would like to have
at least a conversation with him,

have all the facts,
be reminded of correspondence about it.

-I can send it to you.
-Yeah, do, if you don't mind.

-But he's still around, so I'm like...
-I know.

Then he's gonna be at the party,
and it's, like... it's very uncomfortable.

Yeah. Well, he's at the party
because he's helping me for free.

I don't know.

I don't agree at all

with what the stylist said
about G and Chrishell's relationship.

And I've made it very clear
that these things can never happen again.

So where I am with the stylist is...

We're good.

But now, with Chrishell,
this is tricky, this is messy,

because I don't want
to lose her friendship over this.

I just don't wanna be
in a space with that person.

-I know.
-So I'm not gonna be there.

And so, anyway...

[sighs deeply]

Well...

["Something Worth Fighting For"
by RIIVAL plays]

♪ Something worth fighting for ♪

♪ Tell me something worth fighting for ♪

[song ends]

-[funky pop song plays]
-♪ Rollin' thunder ♪

♪ Rumbling in my veins ♪

♪ Ain't like the others ♪

♪ I've never been the same ♪

♪ Gotta get me some of that
Gotta get me some of that ♪

♪ Better watch out
Feels so good to be me right now ♪

I have an amazing client today.

This will be her first purchase
on the West Coast.

And I'm really excited to k*ll it.

♪ Feels so good to be me right now ♪

Whoa! [laughs]

f*cking hell.

-I need a c*ck.
-[Jennifer chuckles]

And maybe not k*ll myself.

-Hi.
-[Bre] How are you?

-Good. Good to see you. Jennifer Purdue.
-Nice to see you. Bre.

-This is beautiful.
-Welcome. Yes.

["Glamorous" by Gilly Suit plays]

This is perfect. I have a client today,
she's relocating from the East Coast.

This street, you can literally
walk to everything here on Melrose.

It is the perfect spot for someone
who's used to being in New York.

I didn't think about that aspect.
I never walk.

-Yes.
-[laughs]

-I'll look around and wait for her. Yeah?
-Yeah.

-Let me know if you have questions.
-Thank you. Appreciate it. Okay, cool.

♪ We put the "glam" in glamorous ♪

♪ Your eyes won't believe it ♪

-Well, hello there.
-Hi!

-This is place is gorge.
-Um, you're gorge.

The fact that I'm wearing a fur coat...

-[laughing]
-...in Los Angeles right now is insane.

I mean, I wasn't gonna say anything,
but I like it.

-[laughs]
-Well, now it's coming off.

-Ooh, yes, make yourself at home.
-Thank you.

-She's cute!
-So, so cute.

I know Sofia because I actually
went on her sex and relationship podcast.

I think that she is amazing
and one of the funniest humans alive.

Sofia's currently living in New York,
but she's looking for a place in LA

so that she can
take the podcast bicoastal.

-How many square feet?
-Twenty-six hundred.

Okay, so my apartment right now
is 650 square feet.

-That's New York for you. Mm-hmm.
-What? I would die.

-So I need more space. 100%.
-Yeah. How is that even legal?

It's like a jail cell size, isn't it?

[both laughing]

I'm pretty sure it is.

Me, in a jail cell? Never! Of course not.

[Sofia] It'd be like a holding cell.

Next question. [chuckles]

So I have a fun surprise for you.

Something really interesting
about this house.

Right here.

-I mean, I feel like this kinda suits you.
-Um...

-I'm sorry. Wait...
-[laughs]

[Sofia chuckles] Is this for real?

[Bre] It's...
Yeah, it's definitely wallpapered.

-There's a vag*na...
-Mm-hmm. There's a lot of...

...with the legs spread.

There's a this. There's a "Shh."

Honestly, it seems like
they're having a really good time.

Yeah, and then this girl
is doing a back bend

with her vag*na in the other girl's face.

I've never done that, have you?

[both laugh]

-[Bre] Yeah.
-This is insane.

-[Bre] Let's get going and see that room.
-Let's go.

["Deluxe" by Poppi Ray plays]

♪ Everything you want
I got it ♪

Oh my God,
we have the same coffee table book!

Oh, look at that.

[Sofia] This house is meant for me.

If you knew what was in that book,

then you... that would solidify
how sexual this house is.

-Really?
-Beyond.

What's in this book? This book?

[Sofia] Girl, just open it, please.
You don't even know what you're in for.

Do I need to know something about you?
You have this book at home?

-[laughs]
-I mean, listen...

-[retches]
-Yeah. That's not a p*nis.

That's a pine cone. It's art, Bre.

This looks like what I learned in class

when they tell you
why you should use protection.

-You're gonna put that away?
-Pretend I didn't see any of that.

-Um...
-[laughs]

But out here is really peaceful.

Having outdoor space in New York
is such a luxury,

and this is just peaceful.

-Sexual and peaceful.
-[laughs]

-So you love it.
-Which is literally my show.

-Yeah.
-That's my podcast.

Yeah. I feel like you could even
sh**t it out here.

Yes.

["I Want You" by B. Deshayes, DEVMO,
and N. Clergue plays]

♪ Know you like it hot ♪

[song ends]

What do you think? We love it? We hate it?

I love it,
but I wanna see a couple more houses.

-Know what I mean? Before...
-We can definitely do that.

I'll get you a couple options,
we'll see them and find you something.

-I'm not worried.
-Okay.

-Love you. Mwah.
-Thank you. I love you too.

We'll find you something, baby.

-All right, I'll see you.
-Bye, babe.

[cell phone ringing]

Hello.

Hey, girl. How you doing?

I'm fine, how are you?

Well, I'm Team Bre, you know that.

So... But I did hear something.

I'm like, hmm, this is good information
to know for Bre.

Alright, give it to me.

Well, I... It's a little much to say.

I'm a little
being cautious with information

because the tea is hot.

All right, well, that sounds like
we need a face to face.

Let's do it.

All right, talk soon. Bye.

["Down the Rabbit Hole" by K. Dantes
and Mystic Femmes plays]

♪ On my way
Down, down, down the rabbit hole ♪

♪ Down, down, down the rabbit hole ♪

[dramatic pop music plays]

♪ Whatchu know about me?
Whatchu know about me? ♪

♪ What do you know about me? ♪

♪ 'Cause I run it ♪

♪ Better get ready ♪

♪ 'Cause we do it like, do it like
Yeah, we do it like that ♪

-Hi, darling. Thank you so much.
-Hot latte.

-This one is the regular flat white.
-Thank you.

And this is the half-caf.

Great, yay.

Amanza, um, her birthday,
are you guys going?

I don't know. What is everyone doing?

I wanna just, like, put everything
behind us and move forward.

So I feel like it would... it would...

This is like one of those things,
it would make it worse if I didn't go.

I don't know. I don't wanna be fake.

Maybe it's a thing where you're like,
"Okay, Amanza, look, I love you,

but I need to love you from afar
at this time."

"That's why I won't be there
to support you."

If that's what you need to do,
that's why we have our inner circle.

-[Emma] Of course.
-Our close circle.

Our people that we trust in,
we depend on 24/7.

You're like my confidant.

I'm an open book with you because
I trust you wholeheartedly as friends.

Um, and then there are certain people
who are on the outer circle.

-There are certain people in space.
-And there are cert... [laughs]

Okay. Just calling it what it is.

We don't have any expectations
for those people

because those people are not our friends.

-You know?
-[Emma] Yeah.

[Chelsea] And for me, that's like Mary.

[Chrishell] Yeah, she was telling me
about how everything started.

-[Chelsea] What happened? What'd she say?
-No, nothing.

Actually, I know this whole story.

She told me part of it
and I was like, "Okay."

The text message that started with,
"Keep my f*cking name out of your mouth."

That part.

First, Mary called me a pot-stirrer

because she thinks I was talking sh*t
about Emma behind her back,

which is not true.

And now she's making matters worse.

She has attacked my outfit
at our broker's open,

when it's never been a problem
for me with my clients,

never been a problem
for me professionally.

[Chrishell] I loved your outfit.
I thought you looked so cute.

[laughing] We had similar cuts of outfits,
so she probably didn't like mine either.

I'm all f*cking legs. It's not my fault.

[laughing]

Oh my God.

[dramatic pop music plays]

♪ Try to keep up ♪

[engine revs]

-♪ Try to keep up ♪
-♪ Try to keep up... ♪

I loved going to the broker's open.
Beautiful listing, by the way.

It is next level, isn't it?
We had over 150 people come in.

-Really? That's awesome.
-How insane is that?

For 28.5 million, like,
to get 150 people there.

[Nicole] That's amazing.

-Here's your chagaccino.
-[Mary] Thank you so much.

And what about with you and Chelsea?
Is that... Did you two talk at the office?

Nope.

And that's why, like,
I don't co-list a lot.

-Except... Unless it's with Jason.
-Of course.

Everybody loves fashion,
but we're also doing business.

You can't just wear anything you want
when you're representing a seller.

We have a 30-million-dollar property
at stake.

I think we all want to go to the Met Ball,
but we're not practicing for that now.

Um, so some pants or something
would be... would be great.

I'm so focused on reputation.

I've worked very, very hard

to put myself in a situation
where I'm very successful and stuff,

and reputation can make or break you.

Agreed.

Reputation, money, success.

All those things are tied together
in this industry.

So, mess with my reputation,
messing with my bank account.

Mary and I both really care about
our bank accounts and like that sh*t full.

You know, you and I can be stupid,
crazy, fun, wild Nicole and Mary.

Yeah.

You know, doing dumb things...

-[chuckling]
-...and peeing our pants on the floor,

but when it comes to work,
it's like... [snaps fingers]

-Oh yeah. Yep. Yeah.
-That switch goes on and it's different.

-You know?
-Yeah.

I supremely do not care

about someone that I'm not friends with
opinion of me, you know?

But I have never once
said anything negative to you or you...

You're my two closest friends
in the office.

...about Mary.

But our relationship stands
where it is and that's...

-[Chrishell] Yeah.
-...a non-relationship.

It's a nice bonus
when you make friends at the office,

but honestly, my top priority is work.

I guess I'm just more focused
on my reputation, stuff like that,

making sure I'm seen as professional
in the workplace.

Yeah, exactly.

[dramatic, eerie pop music plays]

♪ The last one standing ♪

["Louder" by Hotline plays]

♪ Louder, louder ♪

♪ Nobody can tell me
How to do it my way ♪

♪ k*ller aim, k*ller luck
Yeah whatever, live it up ♪

♪ Rollin' with my g*ng
We're taking over this place ♪

♪ Pluggin' in, blow the fuse
Gettin' started, f*ck the rules ♪

♪ Everybody wanna get wild... ♪

Oh! Hot damn. Hello!

♪ We ain't stoppin till we live it loud ♪

♪ Louder, louder
We livin' it louder, louder ♪

-[Romain] What's up, bud?
-You always look sharper than me.

[Romain] Aw.

The one guy.

[Chrishell] Amanza told me
the stylist I've had a problem with,

he won't be coming.

And that just really means a lot to me.

It does feel like
she's making a stand for our friendship,

and I can't wait
to celebrate her birthday.

Espresso martinis!

♪ Louder, louder
We livin' it louder, louder ♪

♪ We goin' all out now ♪

-[Chelsea] Is Bre coming?
-I don't think so. I haven't seen her.

Sleeping... eating... cuddling with Legie,
maybe taking another nap.

I would rather be doing anything
than going to a group event.

But I do love you, Amanza.
Happy birthday. [chuckles]

-Yes. Eyes right here.
-[Chelsea] Oh yes!

Smile. One, two...

-Okay, I think we got it.
-No, can I take...?

Now we're gonna send them to ourselves.

-Can I get two more really spicy ones?
-Put us in.

Jason's really trustworthy.

-Wait! I know! Does he have any nudes?
-We've got his phone and he doesn't care.

He's probably got pictures
of his wee... ween... weiner.

Weiner? Weenie?

[laughs]

Wait, Emma!

[squeals excitedly]

Ooh! I see Jason and a girl!
Jason, who is this?

What the f*ck are you doing
flipping through my photos?

[Chrishell] They posted it to Instagram.
"Hard launch," that's the caption!

-Hard launch?
-[Chrishell] Don't know what that means?

-[Jason] I'm old.
-She'll know what it means.

[laughs]

Okay. What are you drinking?

Oh, "I Love Hot Moms."

-You want one?
-[both laugh]

-I do love hot moms!
-I know!

[funky pop music plays]

♪ Alright now ♪

♪ Get on up ♪

[all cheering loudly]

Are you having fun, bubba?

-[beatboxing]
-Yes!

[chuckles]

[trills approvingly]

[Amanza] So everybody here
is somebody I wanted here,

so I surprisingly felt zero anxiety

as I was entering tonight,

even though I'm completely almost naked.

[man] You look good!

[all cheering]

I'm 47. I'm about to f*ck this sh*t up.
I'm coming in hot.

[upbeat pop music plays]

When I hear 47, I'm like, f*ck.

It just sounds so much older than I feel.

But I feel really good.

I really, truly think
this is gonna be my year.

-I am 47.
-[woman] Yeah!

Oldest in the office!

[people cheering]

Most of you, probably all of you,

also know that this summer
I almost didn't make it to 47.

[somber music plays]

I was told that I was literally


from not having another birthday.

The... My body went through trauma.

I had two major spine surgeries,

and I lost too much blood
after my second surgery,

and my blood pressure dropped,
and my heart rate skyrocketed,

and I was convulsing.

Oof.

-Damn it.
-[music becomes hopeful]

-So...
-[woman] We love you, Amanza!

This is a very special birthday for me.

To... To have somebody tell you

that you're 48 hours or less away...

And I'm looking at my kids
and I'm thinking,

they would have been left
in this cold, dark, negative world

to figure it out.

And that's when this happens because...

And God didn't allow that to happen
because he knows that they need me,

because I'm all they have.

So... whatever saved me in that hospital,

thank God because
I've got f*cking work to do.

-Happy f*cking birthday to me.
-[man] Whoo!

-[chuckles]
-[all cheering]

-Happy birthday!
-[music intensifies]

[all] ♪ Happy birthday to you! ♪

♪ Happy birthday, dear... ♪

[ethereal music plays]

♪ Happy birthday to you! ♪

[people cheering, applauding]

[kissing]

I'm so happy to be here.
I'm so happy to celebrate your birthday.

And these are the things
I would've been really upset to miss.

I know. Me too. I love you.

Fighting with Amanza
felt like fighting with my sister.

I really do love her
and so it... it was stressful,

and I feel like Amanza is right,
life is too short.

So I'm just excited to have her back.

["One Life" by Krysta Youngs plays]

♪ One life, so we not gonna waste it ♪

♪ In the limelight
Like the rich and the famous ♪

Listen, when we're all in the office,
I want to be seen as a professional.

-I'm gonna pick him up!
-[Jason] It's never happening.

Just stop. Stop, stop, stop.

I'm not letting you pick me up.

[Nicole] But, you know,
the appropriate environment,

I just really let my hair down
and that side of me definitely comes out.

Come on. Come on!

Don't mind my friends.

-They're all tipsy and crazy.
-[Nicole] I'll pick him up!

-No, you're done.
-But I can lift him! I wanna do a lift!

I always wanted to master
the Dirty Dancing lift.

I just never thought
I'd be the Patrick Swayze in the mix.

I mean, I lost...
Apparently I lost my phone.

So, that's cool.

-Oh, it's right here!
-[clatters]

[Jason] I just want to give you this.

-It is one of your birthday presents.
-Okay, okay.

This looks legal, am I in trouble?

-You're being served.
-Are we getting a divorce?

[laughs]

We got the St. Ives
listing contract signed.

Hell, yes!

-[Jason] Good job, hon.
-[Amanza shouts] I'm so happy!

Clearly getting back into real estate,

because I didn't recognize
a listing agreement right off the bat.

[Jason] That's a listing
that you brought in.

-Yes!
-So, good job.

-This is a start to a new year.
-Yes.

Last year was a trip.
I mean... I almost died.

And it just motivated me
so much more, even,

because it's like,
"You're supposed to be here,

do everything you can, make a difference,"

because you've been given
a second chance at life,

and I'm just... I'm going hard.

Aw.

That meant a lot.

I have thought about going up to Chelsea
and seeing if everything is okay,

because it was
a little awkward in the office.

-You know her better than I do.
-She's in a super good mood.

-I think now is a good time. Yeah.
-Yeah. Okay.

Okay, I just wanted to make sure.
I don't wanna do any... any harm.

[both laughing]

-Hey, babe! Hi.
-[Chelsea] Hi, honey!

-[Mary] Can I talk to you?
-Of course!

-[Emma] Let me fix your hair, Chelsea.
-Yeah.

I don't want to get in people's way
doing photos.

I just wanted to make sure,
like, we're cool, everything's okay.

Because, um, there's been
multiple issues with me.

sh*t happens sometimes,

and... and if we can move forward
and everything's cool, great.

If not then let's address it.

[Mary] Hello, baby.

Having this conversation now,
it's uncomfortable.

You said to Emma
I'm a sh*t-stirrer and a pot-stirrer.

You also feel like
my dress sense is inappropriate.

I just wanted to know if you actually care
to have a relationship with me.

For the longest time
I felt like you didn't.

Truthfully, I felt like
you didn't give two shits about me.

I have so much respect for you, Mary,

and I'm sorry if I've said anything
that's made you feel otherwise.

I don't feel like you have that for me.

I've always had it for you.

Until I received that text message.

You sent me a text
that was outrageously inappropriate...

Because of what you said.

I get that message, I'm like,
"You better explain yourself."

And no, no one is ever
gonna speak to me like that ever.

I gave a chance 'cause I like you.
I gave a chance.

I don't feel comfortable
with you guys talking about my friends.

-I don't feel comfortable with you...
-Listen.

-It's all fine. We have got your point.
-Wait one second, Romain.

-We got your point.
-No, I'm gonna finish.

I've always felt like
there's been a wedge between us.

I don't feel like you understand me.

Well, but do you understand me?

She understands, you understand.

Some of the words you use towards me
make me feel like you don't see me.

I understand.
She said things that you didn't like.

-[Romain] You said... I know...
-I would... Where's my bodyguard?

-[Romain] Hey...
-Call up your husband.

Call up your husband.

[dramatic sting]

I don't need to have a bodyguard.

-It's inappropriate.
-I don't either. I don't either.

If I have any grievances
with my girlfriends,

I wouldn't call my spouse to get involved.

-That's not how I'd do it.
-I never...

I'm a real-a*s b*tch.

[dramatic music plays]

[Mary] I need a f*cking drink.

That's okay.

Oof.

You guys give me a headache.

-All right. Can I get another?
-[Romain] Can I get a "Black Don't Crack"?

[Chelsea] She's full of f*cking sh*t,
that's what she is. Full of sh*t.

It's not the same,
where you have your partner like...

No, no, I told you that, did you hear me?

[Romain groans]

[Chelsea] Call it what it is.
She doesn't f*ck' like me.

-I don't...
-She hasn't liked me from the beginning.

[music fades]

[high-heeled footsteps clacking]

["Rain Puts a Smile on my Face"
by Yacht Money plays]

♪ I only come out in the dark ♪

♪ This weather, this leather
Is black as my heart ♪

♪ So moody ♪

♪ It's the new me ♪

♪ I'm better than ever
And I'll break your heart ♪

-Well, hello. I missed you.
-Hey! How you doing?

-Missed you too.
-Oh. Hi, baby.

I love that you brought the girls today.

-Only for you. [laughs]
-Oh yeah!

Amanda is also a real estate agent,
and she's a really good friend of mine.

I've known her for probably a decade.

-[Amanda] I missed you!
-I know, I haven't seen you in forever.

-You look so good. My friend Emma.
-Good to see you. Hi!

-Let's hug.
-Nice to meet you.

-[Amanda] You brought a demon?
-I am the demon.

-I like him. Isn't he cute?
-You come to play?

I have come to play today.

Give me the tea.

Since the last time I saw you,
what's... what's going on?

Yeah, I don't know. I mean, the office is...

You getting along with all the girls
for the most part?

I've always gotten along with everybody,

except for Chelsea obviously,
and it was more she had a problem with me.

But I have no desire to have
an actual, genuine relationship with her.

You know, I'm grown.

-We can work together, but that's it.
-Yeah.

-And then there's a new girl.
-Oh, there is?

-Yeah, her name's Alanna.
-Alanna?

-She's nice.
-What is she like? Does she dress cute?

-I plead the Fifth?
-[laughs]

-Our cute?
-Our kind of cute. Our "cute" cute.

-No. Not our... No.
-Nobody's our "cute" cute.

-Spice!
-You know I like a little sass.

-I need a little something.
-That's why we're friends.

But he's gonna need to fill more desks
just to pay for his office.

-It was like a million dollars.
-Yeah.

Well, I do have a little bit of drama.

-[clearing throat]
-[chuckling] Move there first.

I'm sorry, what?

So I did hear something

that can be damaging
about Chelsea's husband.

-[ominous music plays]
-I didn't see it with my own eyes,

but I do have text proof.

I do believe this person
because I've known him forever

and he lives in the same residence
where he saw this.

-Let me show you.
-Oh no.

'Cause I'm a factual, actual kind of gal.

Okay, he goes,
"So you know Chelsea's boyfriend?"

-That's what he said.
-Husband.

-[Amanda] That's what I said.
-Okay.

[Amanda reading]

Look.

[Bre] He was in the lobby at the W...

[dramatic music building]

-"Making out with her."
-Yeah.

I said, "Shut up."
"Two days ago. I swear on my mom."

"On my mom."
I said, "Oh my God, that's juice."

[laughs]

-Oh my God.
-I'm not trying to laugh, but it's true.

Look. "I recognized him..."
This is the part.

"I recognized him right away.
Looked him up."

"Are they still together?
Definitely with another girl."

"Oh my God, that's awful."
The name. "That's his name."

"I hope he's not cheating
'cause I wish that on nobody."

And then I said,
"Why would he do it out in the open?"

He said, "Damn, I wish I took a picture."

[Bre] g*dd*mn,
I wish he'd taken a picture too.

[Amanda] "Looked so distinct.
I knew it was him right away."

[chuckling] "28-year-old girl,
and she was pretty."

Oh f*ck.

I mean,
I can't imagine that she knows this.

When I've been in a situation
when something's going on, I know.

Women's intuition.
We always have a feeling.

Maybe her Birkin for her birthday
was her peace offering.

[woman cheering]

Okay, this is my first Birkin.

[people singing, cheering]

-That's very Beverly Hills of her too.
-I'm just saying.

-Everybody going, "My husband?"
-Yeah.

"What do you mean? Look at my purse.
Who cares? I have a G Wagon."

-Bags first, husband later.
-Yes, that's for sure.

But, obviously, like,
to have, like, this type of information

is hard to digest because it's like,
"You're not my friend."

She'd be like, "Honey, look where
your husband is and not where my man is."

I don't know, man. This one's a hard one.

For most people,

this is detrimental
to their entire existence.

-Yeah.
-To us, we're like, "Another one. Next."

-Like, it's not the same.
-We're like, "You suck. Okay, bye."

-Yeah, but that's not her situation.
-I know.

-She's been with him since she was 20.
-That's why I'm treading lightly.

So do I tell her?
Do I mind my own damn business?

-Mm-hmm.
-Do I just let karma run its course?

I mean, karma's gonna run its course
on everyone anyway, isn't it?

Old Bre would've dragged her
to the pits of Hell.

-Mama Bre...
-I think you are!

-[Bre] I mean, she's... I feel like...
-[laughing] I think we're about to.

[Amanda] Mm-hmm.

Like, as much as I dislike Chelsea
and everything that she's done, like,

that's... that's a heavy hitter

-to just bring to her.
-It is a heavy thing.

It is a heavy thing.

["Shh I Won't Tell"
by Sabrina Carmen plays]

♪ We're taking this one to our graves ♪

Every woman deserves to know if it's true.

So that goes before anything,
in my opinion.

Like, yes, I think she should know.

And next time you start throwing rocks,

you should check your house for any cracks
before you come for mine.

♪ Secrets, secrets are no fun ♪

♪ Unless they're shared with everyone ♪

♪ I won't tell anyone ♪

[song continues]

♪ Can you keep a secret? ♪

♪ Better not repeat it ♪

♪ Can you keep a secret? ♪