(soft, ominous music)
(eerie music, man
coughing from smoke)
(ominous zombie growls)
(actress moaning)
- You guys ready yet?
- [Nate] Almost there, just
gotta tweak the exposure a bit.
- You nervous, dude?
Why are you nervous?
This is your film
school application.
It's gonna be seen by
two people, maybe three.
What do you gotta lose, dude?
Film school's a waste
of money, anyway.
- [Nate] No, it's not.
- Some of the best directors
never went to film school.
- [Nate] A lot of
the best ones did.
- All right, fine, just
(Charlie sighs)
take a deep breath.
- [Nate] Got it.
(Nate sighs)
- I'm hungry.
Honestly, how many
interns does it take
to bring back dinner?
- [Nate] Did you send Aaliyah?
She's smart.
- I don't know about that.
But yeah, man, I sent all three.
- [Nate] Oh, wow.
- Yeah. Wow.
Is he ready?
- [Nate] Yes.
- Why aren't you?
- [Nate] Well,
he's a professional
behind-the-scenes guy,
and I'm not even a film student.
- You're stalling, Nate.
At some point, you're
just gonna have
to stop what you're doing
and press record, okay?
Now, let's check this out, okay?
Here's how it's done.
Hello, my name is
Charlie Marshall,
and I am applying for
the graduate film program
at the prestigious
University of, wherever.
But actually, no,
wait, nevermind.
I'm not, 'cause I don't
wanna set money on fire.
- [Nate] Charlie.
(Charlie chuckles)
- Wait.
See, I've got other ambitions.
This building we're in right
now is called Marshall Stages.
It's where dreams are
made, baby, and I get paid.
And we've got a whole plethora
of productions filming.
You know, all the,
don't gimme that look.
- [Nate] What look?
- You're judging me for having
adult film production
here, aren't you, man?
- I said cut.
- Well, I just thought
the talent making movies in here
would be famous
actors, not porn stars.
- Hey dude, porn stars
could be famous--
(actress moans)
Porn stars could be
famous, too, man.
And you know, maybe I've
had more serious talent
working here if my
interns weren't so dumb.
- That's not nice.
- Whatever, dude.
- [Madame Money Shot] the most
unprofessional set I ever seen.
the walls are basically
plywood and duct tape.
Are you kidding me?
- You get the idea, right?
Just sit up straight,
act confident, smile.
Who knows, do that
same thing for Aaliyah,
maybe she'll f*ck you.
- [Nate] Yeah, eat
a d*ck, Charlie.
(Charlie laughs)
- Easy there, cowboy.
I'm your boss, remember?
- [Nate] Can we just get
this over with, please?
I'm ready.
- Sure, okay, whatever.
Just behave, buddy boy, okay?
Good luck.
- [Director] All right, guys.
t*ts up, dicks hard, let's go.
And action.
(actress moans)
(Nate sighs)
- [Charlie] And,
action.
- Hello, my name is
Nathaniel Lawrence,
and I want to be a filmmaker.
Well, I am a filmmaker.
But I want to learn
how to be a better one.
A lot of the films I've
been seeing recently
have been really big and loud.
Like the summer
blockbusters, you know?
Or, they're the opposite.
They're these small,
experimental art house movies
that are quiet and emotional.
But what if you could have both?
A thoughtful moment
for a character,
amidst a big expl*si*n?
A film that takes risks,
but is also a crowd pleaser.
Like an art house blockbuster.
That's the kind of film--
- Yeah.
That was great, man.
You did a great job.
- Oh, what's up guys?
Hey, Aaliyah.
What's going on?
- Oh, my God, it was horrible.
- I agree.
Dinner break came and went,
and I never got any food.
- Charlie, you
have no idea, man.
- Yeah, I asked three
people to do a simple task,
and none of you got it done.
- Have you seen the news?
- It's crazy out there.
- Mmhmm.
- [Madame Money Shot] Cut.
- [Reggie] Yeah,
pull your phone out.
Do an internet search, it'll be
the first thing that comes up.
- No, Reggie.
Reggie, calm down, buddy.
Okay.
Oh, let's see, I'm getting
all these notifications.
- [Reggie] Uh-huh.
- People stumbling around.
- [Reggie] Yeah.
- Getting sick.
Biting strangers?
- Bingo, man.
It was insane.
We're on our way
to get the food,
and all of a sudden
this homeless guy
just comes outta nowhere,
starts coming at us
with his mouth open like
he's trying to bite Zoe.
Now, I, of course, would
never let that happen.
So, I went right out to
him and kicked his a*s.
- Uh, you shoved
him and he tripped.
But yeah, you stepped up.
- Yeah.
- You stepped up.
- Hey Reggie, are
you feeling okay?
You look really pale.
- Yo, Reggie, you're twitching.
- Maybe you should sit down.
- Is that a bite
mark on your arm?
- I don't know.
- Oh, sh*t.
- Maybe, could be.
- [Aaliyah] That looks nasty.
- It was weird out there, man.
It could be anything.
- Hey Reggie, how you doing?
(bat thuds)
(interns gasp)
- What the f*ck?
Call 911!
(ominous music)
- There's a first
time for everything.
- [Aaliyah] He's fine.
- Guys.
- Man,
that kinda felt good.
- The line is busy.
- What do you mean
the line is busy?
It's 911, how can it be busy?
- Everybody, let's
all remain calm, okay?
- Oh, says the guy who
just attacked our friend.
What the f*ck, Charlie?
- Oh, he's not your
friend anymore.
Ask the film nerd.
Tell him what this guy
is, look at the bite mark.
- Nate, what's he talking about?
- No, there's no way,
that's impossible.
- Yeah.
- Oh, God.
Holy sh*t, are you
filming right now?
- Oh, yes, he is.
- So, we just got video
evidence of our boss
violently attacking an employee.
Excuse me, an unpaid intern.
- Oh, excuse me, what
do you want me to do?
Let this guy run around
and bite everybody?
Check yourself.
- Hey, Reggie.
- [Madame Money Shot]
Alright, here we go guys.
And action.
- Can you hear me?
Please, tell me you're alive.
- I don't like-like
you, but if you wake up,
I'll buy you dinner,
and you can talk
about video games, and crypto,
and your fantasy football
team as much as you want.
(hand slaps)
Yeah, I think he's dead.
- Okay, don't stop recording.
- Actually, we need it.
- No, I'm not letting you
destroy the evidence, Charlie.
- I want him to continue
filming and use all of it.
Go on, man, record all of this.
- Why?
- Because, if I'm
right, I want proof.
Given what we're hearing
about in the news,
I just did what I had to do.
(actress moans)
Okay, now, suck it up, girls.
Let's grab his legs.
- Why?
- Because we're throwing Reggie.
- Come on.
- In the closet.
Let's go.
- Are you
f*cking kidding me?
- Yeah, come on, let's go.
- Just do it.
- God.
Okay.
- Come on.
- [Zoe] Oh my gosh.
- [Aaliyah] Charlie,
f*cking hold on.
Hold on, Charlie.
- Jesus.
Did you guys ever go to PE?
Let's go.
- We're trying!
- [Zoe] He's, like, f*cking 6'5.
- [Charlie] Yeah, just
lift with your legs.
- Okay, ow.
- [Charlie] Goddammit.
- Go to the right a little bit.
Okay, just a second step.
Oh my--
- Okay.
(wall thuds)
Lay him down.
All right.
Doing fine, Zoe,
you're looking good.
Figure it out, okay?
- Prick.
- It's okay.
Sorry, Reggie.
- [Director] Cut.
- We'll deal with that later.
- Guys, what the f*ck?
Do you guys even know how a
film set is supposed to work?
- [Nate] I'm sorry.
There's just a lot--
- Hey, hey.
Leave the kid alone,
man, we had a little
problem over there.
- Okay, I've got
a big problem, 'cause I'm trying
to sh**t something
intimate inside.
- Untitled Christmas porn
doesn't exactly sound intimate.
- Who is she?
- What's it gonna be called?
No, no, "Deck My
Hairy f*cking ba*ls?"
Like, "Angels Cumming?"
"Bukkake on 69th Street?"
- Oh, oh, oh, I got one.
"I'll be Boned for Christmas."
- Be boned for Christmas.
That's good, I like that one.
That's a pretty good one.
- No, no.
It's a Christmas
porn, this is awful.
Christmas is supposed to be
about love and family and Jesus.
- And fetish sex.
- Yeah, okay, let's time out,
'cause I'm not making
a porn, you imbeciles.
This is erotic art.
- Using action cameras?
- It's for the POV shots.
We're doing 4K now.
(Aaliyah snorts)
- Sounds like bullshit.
- Oh, good thing nobody asked
the stupid f*cking intern.
What the f*ck is her deal?
(Charlie laughs)
- I mean, I didn't
say she said it,
but yeah.
- Wow.
Okay.
Wow.
f*ck this b*tch.
I don't know where--
- Oh, honey,
I would scissor you in half.
Thank you no much.
Thank you.
- Whoa listen,
we'll just be quiet
during the next take.
- Thank you, okay.
- Wait, this is about
sound, seriously?
- Yes, and it's ruining my film.
- Wait, can you just fix
it in post-production?
- Well technically, they
could just copy and paste
the moans and grunts
here and there.
Nobody would know
the difference.
- Oh, like this?
Oh yeah.
(Aaliyah moans)
Oh, yeah.
- I'm sorry, have you
never had a hole filled?
What the f*ck was that?
Okay look, I'm not gonna
be insulted on my own set.
- Well, wait a minute here.
I mean, this is my building,
so, I mean, keep going, yeah.
Yeah, keep it going.
- Okay no, Charlie, apologize,
otherwise, I'm leaving here,
and you're not getting a cent.
- [Aaliyah] Just say it.
- Nah, I'm good.
- Okay, so I'm gonna
count to three,
and then I'm gonna leave,
and I'm gonna give you
that one star review
you so deserve.
- Wait, no, no.
- Yeah, we're doing that?
Okay good.
One.
- No, it's really not
a good idea.
- Two.
- [Aaliyah] Oh, stop,
it's really not safe.
- Three.
- Please, don't.
- f*ck you guys.
Holy sh*t!
No, get back.
(creatures growl)
(director shrieks)
(door knocks)
(suspenseful music)
- What the.
Oh, god.
(flesh oozing)
(Charlie softly chuckles)
(zombie groans)
What a shame, right?
What a shame.
Okay.
- [Nate] You just gonna
leave her there?
- Hey, man.
I did all I could, okay?
I mean, you guys wondering,
she still alive, so.
- Yeah, I mean, she
made her choice, Nate.
- What the f*ck?
- Do you agree with this, too?
- I gotta figure this out, man.
- I need a drink.
Or weed.
Or a lot.
- I second that.
- All right, it looks like
these diseased people
are everywhere.
The media is
calling them biters.
- No, they're not biters.
- [Aaliyah] How do you know?
- [Zoe] Then what are they?
(Charlie sighs)
- Go ahead, man.
You can tell 'em.
I'm gonna go get some booze.
We're gonna need it.
- Whoa, please don't leave.
- Nate, what are--
- I'm gonna need it.
- [Aaliyah] What are the biters?
- I don't know how to say it.
- [Aaliyah] So,
what are they, Nate?
Just f*cking spit it out.
- Just say it.
(soft, eerie music)
- They're zombies.
- sh*t.
- Zombies?
- We are so f*cked.
- We're gonna die.
- No, we're not.
(glass clinks)
We're locking this place down.
You want some of that?
Nah.
I wanted to tell you,
always, I hate you.
I hate you, I really do.
- Okay, so we can just leave.
- There are zombies
right outside.
- Do they know about it yet?
- Who?
- You know, the sex people?
(Charlie laughs)
- Zoe, wait a second.
You mean the porn actors
and their sound guy?
- Sex work is work, Zoe.
- I know, just
trying to be nice.
- Damn straight.
- Okay, they probably
have no idea.
We should tell them.
- But do you think
they're, you know.
- Honey, Zoe, I gotta tell you,
I don't think they're
filming anything right now.
- The director is dead.
- What a shame.
- Cool.
- Just died.
- Yeah.
- Charlie.
- [Charlie] Yep?
- Have you seen the news?
- Yeah, I did.
Let's talk about it.
Nate, why don't
you grab a camera.
I'm gonna bring this,
I'm gonna need it.
You might want some.
I spit in it, but I don't know
if you care about--
- I can handle it.
- Yeah, your line of work,
All right, let's go, let's talk.
- [Actress] What in the
French toast is happening?
- [Charlie] I don't
know, man, you tell me.
- [Actress] The sh**t's
been a little rough.
- [Charlie] Hey, Theodore,
how's your herpes?
- Hey buddy.
- Hey, man.
Looking good.
- Hey, mama.
- So, the zombie apocalypse
is really happening.
- Mmhmm.
- Does that mean we're
getting shut down?
- Well, we got a little bit of a
slight issue going
on right now, so.
- They're not in here, right?
- [Charlie] Mm-mm.
- Well, we might as well keep
sh**ting, if you're up for it.
- Yeah, of course.
I mean, you know I
can go for six hours.
- Mmhmm.
- I was under
the tantric tutelage.
- Oh, I didn't know that.
- Yeah, you know that.
Anyway, mama, you in the film?
- Hmm, I could be.
- Where's the director?
- She's out to lunch.
- She's dead.
- Like, dead
off-the-project dead?
Or, like, really dead?
- [Aaliyah] Really dead.
- Like, as-a-doornail,
like, dead?
- [Aaliyah] She
couldn't be deader.
- [Nate] She went outside, okay?
- [Autumn] And you let her?
- Yeah, well, she was being a
d*ck, so not much I could do.
- We really tried to warn her.
- But what's really
going on outside?
Like, is this real?
Is something really happening?
- They said it was
a zombie apocalypse.
- Yeah, she literally went
outside anyways, and she
got eaten by zombies.
- She's dead.
- What is happening?
- Rich, apparently, the sh**t
is going to be canceled,
'cause the director
is just, like, dead.
- Rick, are you paying
attention to anything?
- I'm trying my best.
- Are you listening?
Is his headphones working?
- He's a moron.
- Nate.
BTS, to me.
(Charlie sighs)
- [Autumn] The director's dead.
- Hey, Mom, Kathy.
I'm really sorry
about the squirrels.
- Tell your mom I said hi.
- Really f*cking sorry, Mom.
Okay, well, now that
that's done with,
everybody, we're gonna need
to barricade this place.
So Zoe, can you
put that down, hon?
Aaliyah, I'm looking
at you, let's focus up.
We're gonna need
to get our phones,
try to get as much
footage as possible.
And I want you guys, your hands,
I want you to tape it
to your foreheads, okay?
Yes, so yeah, just do
that, or something.
and let's go.
- Just make sure
they're horizontal, please.
Whoa, man, no wonder
Aaliyah won't f*ck you.
- Uh, excuse me?
- What?
Vertical looks terrible.
He's right.
- It does.
It does look terrible.
Or, we have a
bunch of strap-ons.
- Ooh, you know what?
We have strap-ons for everybody.
We actually do.
- And they sh**t 4K.
- Yeah.
- Hell yeah.
That is a great idea.
Way to think, Autumn.
Theodore, way to use your
head, like always, buddy.
- [Autumn] He's
smarter than he looks.
- [Charlie] I can always
count on that guy.
All right, guys, okay.
- Let's give her
two strap-ons.
- Let's go.
Let's do this,
let's get to work.
- Oh, this would've been
perfect for Bulgaria.
- Oh my gosh, it would.
(tinsel crinkles)
(upbeat, intense music)
(kiss smacks)
- Tell anybody about this,
I'll f*cking k*ll you.
(Rich sighs)
- Okay.
- [Charlie] All right,
guys, let's pick this up.
- [Theodore] Dude,
this love seat'll work.
- My back kind of
hurts, no-can-do.
So, just hind with the legs.
I hurt.
(Charlie winces)
I was like carrying
Nate's interview earlier,
but I don't know what the
camera guy's excuse is.
- Hey, Charlie.
- 'Cause he's like a lazy--
- [Theodore] Will you
shut the f*ck up, dude?
- No-can-do, Theodore.
Save it for Autumn.
- [Nate] I concur, do
you ever shut your mouth?
- Oh, okay.
Just bang it up, bang it up.
I mean, you know how to do that.
Jackpot, yeah.
- All right, oh, f*ck.
(metal clangs)
- It looks good on you.
- Thanks.
- [Theodore] That's
the perfect hand job.
Deck the halls, muthafucka
- Hey, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa.
No, no, no, Zoe,
Zoe, Zoe, come on.
- Yeah, Nate said the tape
was on the porn set, so.
Oh, here.
- Hey, Aaliyah.
Look at my package.
- Can you get more
wrapping paper?
- Yeah, sure.
(wrapping paper crinkles)
- And while you're down there.
- Hey, you're not telling
anybody about that
f*cking kiss, are you?
- [Rich] No.
- [Charlie] Cool.
Good.
(paper crinkles)
(paper roll thuds)
What the f*ck, Zoe?
Ouch, dude.
That wasn't cool, man.
(Charlie sighs)
(Nate chuckles)
- I'm not that thirsty.
(Rich sighs)
- Sorry, man.
- No.
Cut, bro.
Move, move.
- Yo.
Hey, I knew it was you to hit me
with that paper roll, Aaliyah.
f*ck you.
- f*ck you.
- f*ck you.
Hey, yo, Nate, come here, man.
You look tired,
buddy, take a seat.
(Charlie sighs)
- So.
What do we do now?
- Just wait for it
to be over, I guess.
- Well, in the meantime,
I got some stuff I
can share with y'all.
It was supposed to be
for the Christmas party,
but given the circumstances.
- Oh, yeah, you said you
had a weed stash, right?
- That would be
amazing, Charlie.
- Is it good though?
Or is it a weak
bowl of sh*t strain?
- Hey now, look who
you're talking to.
Yo, my dad owns a
grow house in Oregon.
I mean, y'all, weed
runs in my family, okay?
Trust me, this sh*t is legit.
- [Aaliyah] Prove it.
- All right, you know what?
I forgive y'all, man.
You know, f*ck the
apocalypse, dudes.
I'm about to give you the
best f*cking Christmas ever.
(Charlie inhales and exhales)
Let's party, y'all.
(Charlie barks)
(upbeat rock music)
(all cheer)
Santa Claus can suck my d*ck
The holidays
make me feel sick
I don't wanna be here at all
You can deck my hairy ba*ls
Take the elves to
the shed out back
And beat 'em all
with a baseball bat
All the snowmen
are getting high
The reindeer blacked
out, and so did I
The holidays can
set your heart aglow
But I just want
to do some blow
I'm so tired of
this Christmas sh*t
Santa Claus can
suck my f*ck' d*ck
(Charlie coughs)
Santa Claus can
suck my f*ck' d*ck
- Can I talk to
you guys a second?
It's about Reggie, man.
(soft, electronic music)
I saw horses in his eyes, man.
He looked at me, when
I f*cking cracked him.
I saw his whole life
flash before my eyes.
Like horses eyes.
And, and I, I, I
don't know, man.
Like, it felt kind of good, man.
(upbeat rock music)
Back in the day, we
would have a break
But now, we're broke,
and we're all half baked
Say, load a bong
up and rip it back
- Man, I dropped that sh*t
faster than I dropped Reggie.
f*cking bing-bong, man.
Old St. Nick and
the mistletoe
Will bring the
gift of fellatio
The holidays could
be so full of cheer
But I just want
to pound some beer
So tired of this
Christmas sh*t
Santa Claus can
suck my f*ck' d*ck
(Rich groans)
- Boom!
(all laugh)
- f*ck yeah.
(all cheer)
So, like, you tossed his salad?
- Yeah.
I had a little cucumber,
chop it up real nice.
- Hey, you got any weed?
- Oh, dude, Zoe,
I love you, man.
It's the f*ck' back.
- Are you feeling it?
- Hard.
- Good.
- You good, too?
- [Theodore] Good, good.
- [Autumn] Sometimes I put
a little bit of croutons.
- [Aaliyah] It's good.
- [Autumn] A little olive oil.
- Get it crunchy.
- [Autumn] Get it
crunchy, lather it up.
Get it nice and oiled.
- [Theodore] You're
talking about salad?
- [Autumn] Yeah, it's a salad.
Dinner salad.
- Oh, that's good.
- What, what?
- Yeah.
- It's healthy.
- [Charlie] Why are we
talking about croutons?
- Talking about salad, man.
- That's the crunch.
- A salad.
- Salad?
- Yeah, like at dinner.
- Hey.
- [Theodore] It's
like before dinner.
Sometimes, you
eat it for dinner.
- [Autumn] Yeah, it's green.
- Look what I found.
- It's the real weed,
not that fake stuff
Charlie's been passing around.
Do you wanna try it?
- Oh, no, but thanks.
I appreciate it.
(lighter clicks)
- I'm hungry.
- [Charlie] Hey man, good
for you for saying that.
Some people are embarrassed.
- Hey, I'm gonna get food.
(group murmurs)
- [Charlie] No, I'm
saying like, good for you
for saying that.
- There you go.
- [Charlie] You know what?
Good, that's good.
- Ooo, cute little doggie.
Step aside, so I can pass.
(nutcracker clicks)
- [Charlie] Hey.
- Nice to meet you, too.
- [Charlie] Hey.
(candy cane rattles)
Hey.
(victims shrieking)
- Aw, you're hungry, you
got some finger food.
(zombies slurp and moan)
(suspenseful music)
Boop.
Like my, yo.
Hey yo, Zoe, what the f*ck?
Where did you go?
- Oh my God. Zoe,
you went outside?
- I was hungry, so I got
some snacks from my car.
Do you want some?
- No, I absolutely
don't want any snacks.
- What happened?
Are you okay?
- Not good.
- Hey, Zoe.
f*ck, Zoe.
Hey, look at me.
(hands clap)
Earth to f*cking Captain Yellow,
we're in apocalypse right now.
What are you doing
going outside?
Jesus, don't hurt yourself.
(chair rattles)
- Um.
- Hey.
- Why is everyone so mad?
- 'Cause you endangered
us all, dingle butt.
- Hey, there's no
need for name-calling.
- Hold on a sec.
How high are you, exactly?
Okay, I see.
(Zoe snickers)
I see.
- [Theodore] See
what, we're all baked.
(Zoe and Charlie chuckle)
- Oh, okay.
- She's on a different level.
- No, no, no, she didn't
have the normal, did you?
Zoe, she had the
really good sh*t.
- Oh, so you were
holding out on us?
- Yeah, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
- Yeah, what is
the really good sh*t?
- Excuse me, sweetheart.
All right, let papa tell you.
Okay, lean in, get in here.
- [Autumn] Yeah, I wanna hear.
- It's from my
secret stash, okay?
It is a secret hybrid grow.
It's a unique creation of mine.
I haven't even tried it.
I've been afraid.
I mean, look at her, okay?
It's supposed to
be off limits, man.
But I think that we might've
just stumbled on
something really big.
- [Autumn] How
big is really big?
- Like, f*cking massive, guys.
I mean, think about it, okay?
Look at her.
Look at Zoe right now, okay?
Like, really look
at her f*cking face.
- She's wrecked.
- Yeah, she's taken
a couple hits and she's, what?
High as f*ck.
- And she's also dumb.
- Hey, look at her.
No, she's not dumb.
But look at her, dude.
She shambling around, she's
mumbling, she's humming.
She just went outside,
she doesn't have
a scratch on her.
(Zoe giggles)
What does she look like to you?
- Okay, okay, hold on.
Are you--
- She looks like a child,
with no brains.
- But are you
really trying to say
that your weed is so powerful
that it makes Zoe
look like a zombie?
And Zoe got ignored by the
zombies waiting outside,
because your weed
is basically, like,
I don't know, some
zombie vaccine?
- Yes, exactly.
That's exactly what
I'm saying, Nate.
- You must be joking.
- That's some horse sh*t.
- Please be joking.
- [Aaliyah] That
is the dumbest sh*t
I've ever heard, Charlie.
- No, Aaliyah, that is the best
sh*t that you've ever heard.
Guys.
- You're delusional.
- Guys, think about it.
Dude, I just created a f*cking
cure for the apocalypse.
- [Theodore] Oh, here we go.
- No, no.
- Here we go.
No, shut the f*ck up, Theodore.
Nate, get in the back,
get my secret stash,
bring it out here.
- Hey.
- We need to show
everybody this, okay?
(Nate sighs)
- Don't treat him that way.
- Dudes, I have,
- He's sensitive.
- I'm gonna save
the f*cking world, I'm gonna
call this zombie strain, man.
- Hey, shh, guys.
(wall thuds)
Look at this.
- Yo, get the f*ck
outta the way.
What?
Oh my.
(child shouts)
Oh, my God.
Theodore, go lock the
break room door right now.
- Gladly.
(soft, eerie music)
- I think we should help her.
- But then, we'd have
to open the door.
- Zoe just smoked
some zombie strain.
She should go out there.
- Don't be ridiculous.
- Are you actually still
trying to convince us
that smoking your weeded
prevents zombie attacks?
- There's only one
way to find out, guys.
- Everything is spinning.
And f*ck you, I
cleaned the room.
- Yeah, maybe you should smoke
some zombie strain
and rescue the kid.
The zombies won't touch you.
- Whoa.
- Unless.
- Yo, I gotta be here.
I gotta f*cking
focus on this, man.
- Mmhmm.
- You know what?
That's a stupid
f*cking idea, Nate.
(zombies groan)
(child shouts)
Well, that back door is secured,
so unfortunately, that
kid is zombie food.
(zombies roar)
Okay, who forgot to
lock the back door?
(child screams)
(soft, eerie music)
(zombies groan)
- f*ck, Charlie.
- All right, everybody,
let's just all remain calm.
Take a deep breath
with me, right?
- No.
(zombies moan)
(electricity buzzes)
- [Charlie] Freeze.
- What just happened?
(zombies growl)
- That can't be good.
- He sounds cranky.
- Now, we're f*cked.
- No.
No we're not, guys.
We just got a little problem.
- [Nate] What do we do?
- I don't know, man.
Just gimme a second
to think, Nate.
(ominous music)
Okay, okay, nobody freak out.
(Charlie sighs)
Everyone just stay
calm, stay quiet.
We need to just chill,
because there are
obviously zombies
in the building now.
- Wait.
You still have those
security cameras, right?
- Mmhmm.
- Are they connected
to the main power grid?
- No, actually, they're
battery powered,
because I figured
that was necessary.
California's the fifth
largest economy in the world,
but still has rolling blackouts.
- Okay, okay, okay.
Is there any way
that we can access
those camera feeds
while the power's out?
- Oh, my laptop.
- g*dd*mn, dude.
- I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I can't see that great.
Just don't take it personally.
- Calm the f*ck down.
- Okay, okay.
Come on, come on.
Hope it has battery.
(animal noises)
(actors moan)
Oh.
- Is that Autumn?
- Does anyone have eye bleach?
- Okay, there it is, okay.
We need to turn on the hotspot,
because the WiFi is out,
because of the power.
And now I need to, okay,
activate, activate,
activate, activate,
the night vision, so I can--
- Come on.
- Yeah, so I can
activate the cameras, okay.
(Charlie sighs)
- Oh, right there.
There's one.
(eerie music)
(zombie softly pants)
- Is that where the
circuit breaker is?
- Don't touch the screen.
- Sorry, sorry, sorry.
Is that where the
circuit breaker is,
next to the back door?
- Why, yes it is, Autumn.
- Okay, that explains it.
I need to go there.
- [Theodore] Why?
- Because the zombies,
they must have damaged it,
or a switch got tripped somehow.
That's why the power's out.
- Thanks, Zoe.
- Now I can see you.
- Of course, why didn't
I think about that?
- So, you'd be able to
fix the circuit breaker?
- Yes.
- How?
- I'm an electrical
engineering student.
The erotic video and
all that kind of stuff
is just to pay my tuition.
- I just used my nine
inches to get paid.
- Got a big d*ck.
- He does.
- Okay, well, you can't
go out there alone,
so I can go with you.
- No Nate, you're sitting here.
- Thank you.
- Why?
- I need you to stand
guard in the lobby,
because Autumn has to
go through the stage
to get to the circuit breaker,
and it'll be really dangerous,
and I need you out there
to guard, to watch,
so if zombies get close
by, you can yell for me.
- Okay, all right.
- Okay.
Autumn.
- Yes.
- Come here.
Listen close.
(Charlie exhales)
As soon as the lights come
on, I need you to run.
I mean, run back
to the lobby door.
Knock on it so we can
come let you back in.
- Okay, I can run fast.
- I'll go with her.
- Thanks, Teddy.
I could use a strong
set of hands, yeah.
Rich?
Rich, do you wanna come with us?
You have the boom pole,
that could be helpful.
- You wanna do coke?
- No, the boom pole, Rich.
If the zombies come, you
just give it a good smack.
- Sure, whatever, yeah.
- Okay.
- I'll go with them, too.
- No, Aaliyah,
you're staying here.
(Charlie sighs)
Three people's
already pushing it.
Look at me, we want to minimize
the chances of the
zombies seeing them.
We don't want them to have
a f*cking buffet, all right?
- Fine, just shut up.
- Is there anything around here,
anything that we
could use as a weapon?
- Horses in his eyes?
Horses in his eyes.
Reggie, Reggie, Reggie.
(Charlie sighs)
Theodore, in the lobby,
I left the bat behind
the weird tree thing.
- Got it.
- Okay, Theodore.
Autumn.
- Yes.
- Rich.
You guys are gonna
be Team Penetrate.
I'm gonna strap you
on, strap you in,
get those access cameras.
Nate, I need you to
get the B-camera.
I need you to follow
them and watch them.
I want proof if
anything happens, I do
not want to get sued.
Hands in.
(hands clap)
Not you, you get outta here.
- Alright, Team Penetrate.
You f*cking pig.
- We're gonna say a prayer.
You're like a demon.
Okay.
(Charlie sighs)
Guys, I'm gonna say a prayer.
Heads down, please,
moment of silence.
Not for you, but for me, okay.
Hey God, it's me, Charlie.
I want to apologize for
Reggie, but at least you got
a really good intern up
there to watch the squirrels.
Okay.
And one, two, three.
Penetrate.
- Team penetrate.
- Woo.
- Woo.
Okay.
- Okay.
- All right, gonna get
my combat boots on.
- I'll grab the camera.
- [Theodore] Let's
get outta here
before more zombies show up.
- Good luck.
- Thank you.
- Psst.
Aaliyah, I need you
to gimme your phone,
so I can call Autumn, so we
can communicate with them.
- Why does it have
to be my phone?
I'm trying to save battery.
- She's in the hot spot,
we can't mess with that.
(Aaliyah grunts)
(Charlie sighs)
You are so stubborn.
You must have had a really
bad mom, or something.
(flashlights click)
(soft, ominous music)
- Charlie, are we in the clear?
- Hey.
(screen thuds)
Autumn, turn to your left.
I'm literally in the same
room as you, dumb a*s.
- So far, no zombies yet.
- Guy's making jokes in
the zombie apocalypse.
(Autumn sighs)
- I thought she was like
an engineer or something.
I guess not.
(cord rattles)
(Autumn sighs)
- [Theodore] Definitely
could've been decorated better.
(soft, eerie music)
(Autumn gasps)
- Quiet on set.
- Jackpot.
- Aw.
- Beautiful, right?
- Yeah, it's beautiful.
- All right, let's
keep it moving.
- Okay.
Okay, okay.
- We don't have time.
- Okay, so here's the thing.
- [Autumn] What is it?
- There's zombies in
the main stage area.
So, you're gonna have to turn
your flashlights off
when you go in there.
- No way.
Are you crazy?
- No, we'll be fumbling
around in the dark all day.
- If you got your
flashlights on,
the zombies are gonna know
exactly where you are.
- Oh, that's what the
baseball bat is for.
- Do you really
wanna take that risk?
- Theodore, this is Aaliyah.
Don't do anything
stupid, please.
- You think I'm trying to?
- I can see the zombies
right here on my camera.
I'm gonna tell you guys
exactly where to go.
Don't you take that
phone away from me again,
especially when I'm using
it for something important.
(Charlie exhales)
All right, we're gonna
take this nice and slow.
It's gonna be okay, guys.
Trust me?
- I don't know, should I?
- We'll give it a shot.
- We got people leaving doors
unlocked in here and sh*t.
- But if you lead us astray.
- Why didn't you
guys just get going
before they hear you, please?
(table thuds)
Chop-chop.
Amateurs.
(flashlights click)
- [Theodore] Look, it's dark.
We can't see anything.
I want you to take my hand.
- Okay, okay, okay,
but listen to me.
I know that we had
sex on camera earlier,
but like, this is just
work, this isn't--
- Yeah, no, I understand that.
- Okay.
- I compartmentalize everything.
Trust me, that's why I'm a star.
- Okay.
- Anyway, you are gonna
grab my wrist, okay?
Be careful, though.
And then, we're gonna rely
off Charlie's directions.
Yeah, he's an idiot, but
he's the only thing we got.
And Rick.
- What?
- Rich.
- [Rich] What, go ahead.
- [Theodore] You don't really
care what I call you, right?
- That's fine.
- It's an apocalypse.
Who cares?
- It's okay.
- [Theodore] You're touching
my, that ain't my wrist.
- [Rich] Oh, sorry.
[Rich] Whoa...
- [Theodore] Go ahead.
(door clangs)
Yeah, quiet.
- [Autumn] Oh, gosh, let's
hope zombies don't hear.
- [Theodore] Well, I don't
think zombies can hear anything.
(Autumn hushing)
They only hear footprints.
- [Autumn] Okay.
- All right.
(Charlie sighs)
- Dum-dums, here we go.
First off, hug the right wall,
that's the right
wall, and move slow.
- [Autumn] Hug the wall.
Shock the f*ck wall.
- [Theodore] I
always wondered why
the zombies got a bad rap.
- [Autumn] Yeah, I know.
(soft, eerie music)
Oh my gosh, what is that?
- Autumn shut up, or they're
gonna f*cking hear you.
(zombie groans)
All right, there's one.
At,
f*ck, I shouldn't have
been in a sh*t school.
One, two, three,
four, five, six.
Okay, at 10, 10:00.
Move slowly and
quickly, forward.
(ominous music)
- [Autumn] Ow.
- No, no no!
No, don't!
(Charlie freaking out)
- Okay, new strategy,
give me the phone.
- No, no.
- [Theodore] Ah, c*ck slam!
Go, go, go.
(zombie groans)
Oh my God, what's
that guy's name again?
What's the sound guy's name?
- Rich, as*h*le.
- I know I'm a rich as*h*le
. What's the sound
guy's name, Aaliyah?
- His name is Rich.
You're a dumbass.
Give me the phone.
- No, no.
Hey, hey.
- Yes, you're selfish.
I'm the one--
- All right, that's enough!
I thought you would've learned
from all those HR seminars.
How dare you invade my
personal space, Aaliyah?
(Charlie pants)
- Are you okay?
- I'm fine, Zoe.
- You're a crisis.
- What is your problem?
- Get the f*ck out now!
- f*ck! Jesus!
- You're a little leprechaun
demon, I hope you die.
- [Rich] Little girl?
(child hums)
Is that you?
- [Aaliyah] God.
sh*t.
- What's going on?
Charlie's gonna
get us all k*lled.
- Are the others okay?
- Nope, they're running
for their lives,
and Charlie kicked me
out for trying to help.
- What?
- Yeah.
- I'm going in there.
- He locked the door.
Let's just stay out here,
and if we hear screams,
we can go help.
- Goddammit!
God, it's me, again.
Your warrior of change.
If it's within your power,
can you please, please,
for the love of Jesus, and
I know you love your Son,
and you love me, deny Aaliyah
access to Your holy kingdom.
Take this as a prayer.
(Charlie chants in falsetto)
I dunno, just please,
I hate her so much.
- What's wrong?
- Autumn won't answer her phone.
- Maybe she doesn't
wanna answer her phone.
- You think, Zoe?
You think?
(Zoe gasps)
- Maybe she put it
on do not disturb.
- Nate, I think you
should be in charge.
- Wait, me?
Why?
- You're smarter than Charlie.
You actually care about us.
- I'm surprised you noticed.
- Yeah, you're proactive,
you've got morals.
- I feel the same way about you.
- Nate, you are a thoughtful
person who's on top of things.
Charlie is a loser
who lets a porn crew
sh**t in his new sound
stage because he has
no business plan or
management skills.
- I think if you
had been in charge,
you would've made sure all
the doors were secured,
and there'd be no
zombies in here.
Just us.
- [Rich] Hello?
Are you still there?
(child hums)
It's okay.
You're safe now, okay?
Little girl?
(zombie moans)
Not good.
- Or maybe it's
on airplane mode.
That does the same thing,
except we're not in an airplane.
Weird.
- Wow, that weed must be a
lot stronger than I thought.
- It's not just weed,
it's the really good sh*t.
(door pounds)
- It's Nate, open up.
- What?
(door pounds)
- Let us in.
Charlie.
- Come on, Charlie.
- Guard the f*cking other door!
- Open up, right now.
- Guard the door!
(Rich yells)
- [Theodore] Zombie
piece of sh*t.
- [Nate] Come on.
- Zombie strain,
zombie strain...
- [Autumn] Teddy, Teddy,
use that big-d*ck energy.
Use it.
- [Theodore] I got the
d*ck of the decade.
- [Autumn] Oh, there we go.
There we go, there we go.
Gotta go, gotta go fast.
(Autumns gasps)
(zombie roars)
(Autumn screams)
- [Theodore] Come on, get up.
- Ow.
- Come on.
(child cries)
Come on, come on, come on.
(Autumn pants)
Come on.
He's dead.
- Come on, come on.
- Get inside.
Come on, hurry
- Come on, come on, come on.
- Whoa, sh*t.
- How do you do that
with a nine-inch c*ck?
- Are you okay?
- Where's the bathroom?
- It's in the stage.
- You could go change
in the storage room.
- No way, there's a corpse
in there, and cameras.
- You can go to
Charlie's office.
There's no cameras in
there, and the doors lock.
Oh, sh*t.
(Zoe gasps)
- Oh my gosh, do you need a pad?
- Wait, aren't we
missing somebody.
- Rich, Theo?
Oh my God, guys.
Rich is dead.
- Jesus.
- Rich is dead.
- Autumn looked like she slipped
and fell in a pile of guts.
- It's traumatizing.
- Let's give her some
space, she needs it.
- What happened?
- Rich is dead.
- Who is that again?
- The guy with the
big headphones.
- Oh, right.
I'm so sorry.
Do you want some?
- No, Zoe.
- I just thought since
you were stressed.
- What, do I look
like a pothead?
Now's not the time for
weed, somebody died.
- Okay.
(lighter clicks)
- We gotta do something
about these zombies.
- I couldn't agree more.
Oh, are there any
other exits you forgot?
- No, just that one.
- Have any of the zombies
been k*lled so far?
- Nope.
- f*ck.
- Great.
- We gotta get rid of
these zombies, and now.
They could trip to power again,
and we'd be right
back where we started.
- How many did you
see in there, Theo?
You have the security
cameras right there.
You could check them
yourself, as*h*le.
- Right, yeah, right.
- Why did I listen
to you, Charlie?
I just stood right
here in the hall
while you messed things up
and got somebody k*lled.
- No, I didn't get
anybody k*lled.
I called Autumn, okay?
She stopped answering
when sh*t got bad.
I told her so many times,
if she would've picked up,
I could've told her
that that little kid
that Rich was hanging out
with was acting weird,
and then he'd still be alive.
- So, now we're victim blaming.
- Oh, gimme a break!
- I can't believe this.
- Just shut up.
- They came for you.
- Shut up, man, you shut up.
- Wait, wait, wait, wait.
I hear something, guys.
- [Autumns Can someone
help me, please?
- I'll go, you guys stay here.
- Hey, could you be my hero and
grab me a change of clothes?
- Yeah, of course.
- I think my bag's
in the lobby.
- Okay, yeah.
Here.
- Thank you.
- [Nate] Where can
we find weapons?
- I don't know.
Theodore had a bat.
Rich had a boom pole, but
those got lost on the stage.
- Is there anything else,
somewhere we haven't checked?
(Zoe gasps)
- Sex dungeon.
- What?
- They built a sex dungeon set.
It's where they keep
all the kinky stuff.
- A sex dungeon in
a Christmas porn?
Zoe, how do you know about this?
- Well, I went
exploring after lunch
before we saw our first zombie.
(Zoe gasps)
Nate, you could hit
him with a sex whip.
(Zoe exhales)
- How are you still high?
(Zoe exhales)
- All right, but she's onto
something though, right?
- I mean, I'd be
surprised if anything
they brought wasn't rubber, but,
I mean, honestly,
I don't know Nate.
That director was crazy, so.
- Sounds like it's worth a shot.
(door clicks)
- I'm back.
What's the plan?
(Charlie sighs)
- We're going to
the sex dungeon.
(hands clap)
(Zoe gasps)
- Sex dungeon!
- This is just
the zombie closet.
- I think they were using this
as a prop room,
not a sex dungeon.
- How are you planning to use
all that stuff in
a Christmas porn?
- The director thought
that it would be edgy,
something you've
never seen before.
She said you don't
know what Santa
and Mrs. Claus do when
he comes home from work.
she's going to jingle his ba*ls
all the way to Christmas!
- That is so messed up.
- That's good.
(soft, ominous music)
- It's so soft.
(Zoe giggles)
Nate, look how soft it is.
- Stop it.
Can we be serious, please?
- Yeah, yeah, okay.
(Charlie sighs)
Let's do this.
- Hell yeah.
- Let's do this.
(soft, intense music)
(tape crunches)
- Autumn, why do
you have nunchucks?
- I don't know
how they got here,
but I know how to use them.
- [Charlie] Huh.
- All right, so what's the plan?
- Okay, well, we're
gonna go in there.
We're going to skewer all
the zombies in the brain,
and then, we're gonna grab them,
and we're just gonna
put 'em right in here.
- That sounds like a bad plan.
- Okay, why?
Why is it a bad plan, Aaliyah?
- Because some of these
weapons are just dumb props.
- Hey, somebody must
have worked hard
to make these the way
our director wanted them.
- Nobody cares.
- Madame Money Shot cared,
and she got eaten by zombies.
- Well, Autumn, we're
going to go in there,
we're going to defend her honor,
and we're gonna k*ll her enemies
and our enemies, right guys?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Okay, but seriously.
We can attack them
from both sides, right?
Three of us go one way,
three of us go the other.
- I think you're
forgetting someone, Nate,
so it doesn't really count.
- All right.
How about this?
Theo and I go one way, and you
and the girls go the other.
- Why am I stuck with the girls?
- Oh, boo.
- Sexist.
- Oh, come on.
I mean, Aaliyah has candy
canes, Autumn has nunchucks.
You can't really stab zombies
in the brain with those, Nate.
- But they can
distract the zombies,
and you can stab them
with your makeshift thing.
- Yeah, yeah, you're right.
You're right.
- Hey.
- Hey, Aaliyah.
- That works.
So.
- Come here.
- Right, well then,
what are we gonna do?
- Okay, if Theo and
I go to the left--
- Come here.
- Okay.
Are you okay?
- You want some?
- I don't need more weed, Zoe.
- But it's the really good sh*t.
- No, I need my reflexes
for fighting zombies.
- Just one hit, I
offered some to Nate,
but he's being really boring.
- Well, he is really boring.
(Aaliyah chuckles)
- You think so?
I thought you liked him.
- No.
- Really?
Well, if you don't like Nate,
don't you think you
should tell him that?
- Okay, I just want us to
get out of this alive, okay?
I cannot be dealing with
disappointed men right now.
Okay?
- Okay.
- So, try to sober up.
- Do you want some?
- [BTS Guy] Sure.
(intense, funky music)
- Okay, yeah, that makes sense.
So, we talked about it.
We're going to hit the
enemy from both sides.
- Charlie, what
does that represent?
- Hitting the enemy from
both sides, just go with it.
Yes, please, just,
um, okay guys.
I'm gonna be real with you.
Take a deep breath,
just in, and out.
(Zoe sighs deeply)
Some of us might
die, but that's life.
But we don't want
it to be this life.
So, let's just all
remain calm, be a team,
and avenge our friends and
fight for our friends now.
So, hands in.
I mean you too, Aaliyah.
You're part of this.
Okay guys, I want you
to say it after me.
We are team Don't Die
For Charlie, okay?
We are team Don't
Die For Charlie.
Ready, one--
- And for Rich.
Yes, and we're
doing this for Rich.
So, ready?
One, two, three.
Don't Die for Charlie.
- Charlie.
Oh.
(Autumn exhales)
- Reggie.
I'm gonna protect my
little wolves, Reggie.
I'm gonna do it for you, man.
(Charlie sighs)
Okay.
Nate, BTS guy, I want you
guys to refill the batteries.
I don't wanna miss anything.
This is my moment, and I
don't wanna get sued, so,
(hands clap)
let's go, let's get
our game faces on.
(Charlie exhales)
Let's do this.
(zombie grunts)
- [Zoe] Excuse me,
just don't mind me.
- [Charlie] Zoe, Zoe, Zoe.
(Zoe gasps)
- Hi.
- Zoe, quick.
Push forward.
I'm gonna mess you up, man.
(zombie roars)
Don't do it, don't
break formation, man.
- Here.
- Zoe.
(zombies groan and snort)
Come here, they'll
take care of you.
(zombies groan)
Whoa.
Okay.
Bye now.
I'm not trying to leave.
- Zoe, Zoe.
- I'm gonna wrap you up.
(zombie groans)
- Oh, you wanna dance?
- Zoe, there's zombies
all over the room.
- [Zoe] Dance with
me, Nathaniel.
- [Nate] Come on.
- [Zoe] Bad zombie.
- Oh my gosh, you two
get a room, I got this.
(Aaliyah groans)
- Zoe, we can dance later
after we k*ll all the zombies.
(zombie hisses)
- [Nate] Let's have
our dance in the lobby.
- Really?
- Nate.
- She'll die if she stays.
- [Charlie] Nobody's leaving
until we k*ll all the zombies!
(Charlie shouts)
(flesh crunches)
- [Zoe] Nate and I are
going to the lobby.
- No, no, you can't leave, Zoe.
- Charlie, back off.
- No, you back off.
I'm the boss, remember?
- There is no boss,
there's zombies.
- What are you
talking about, dude?
I'm still the f*cking boss, man.
This is still America!
- Charlie, I swear.
- [Theodore] Hey
morons, knock it off.
- [Aaliyah] No.
- Oh, f*ck.
(Autumn shrieks and grunts)
(intense percussive music)
Bing-bong.
You, Teddy.
- Sweet Prince.
Nate, I forgive you for now.
We need to clean up this
place, we need to help Theo.
Go, clear the bodies off.
Zoe, help him, please.
Aaliyah, I need you to
get sheets and a med kit.
Okay, go.
- On it.
- Wait, wait, wait,
come here, come here.
I know we've had
our differences,
but this is Theo's moment.
Move B-cam and focus on that.
- Okay.
- For Theo.
- [Nate] Okay, we'll just--
- This is your
moment, sweet king.
- g*dd*mn, an-d*ck-conda.
Man, come on, dude,
don't you have a soul?
Why don't you do
something for once?
(Charlie coughs and retches)
(soft piano music)
Oh, my God.
You're gonna be fine, man,
just hold it, hold it.
I once wanted, your
turn, your turn,
I wanted to go to middle school,
medical cool, school, once, so.
Oh, my God. I haven't stuttered
since, since third grade.
Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.
(Charlie shushes)
Papa's got a bandaid,
Papa's got a bandaid, okay?
It's okay, it's okay.
(Charlie retches)
Okay, you're gonna be fine.
You're gonna be good.
Nate.
Nate, I need your help.
- [Nate] Zoe--
(Charlie shrieks)
Can you take care of
a B camera real quick?
- Okay.
Ready, one, two, three.
Use your legs, don't
hinge, don't hinge.
Ready, one, two, three, oh
my god, this guy's all c*ck.
You have a big c*ck.
Oh, my God, my back, my back.
Oh, my God, Theo.
Theo, not him, not
him, me, me, me.
I'm right here, Papa's
right here, okay?
Man, son of nine
inches, house of porn,
may you're ba*ls carry
you to Valhalla, man,
among all those sexy, sexy,
sexy valkyrie b*tches, you know?
They're so hot, man.
You're gonna be fine,
just keep pressure, man.
And then your ba*ls, I
mean, not your ba*ls, man.
We talked about your ba*ls, but
your shaft, it's pretty big.
Be like a tree, you know?
In the Amazon, like one
of those like redwoods.
It's big and thick and--
- Don't play with that.
- May you orgy until
kingdom comes again, man.
(Autumn sighs)
- Whoa.
Is that a body?
- Oh, yeah.
That was Reggie,
the other intern.
He got bit, and Charlie hit
him in the head with a bat.
- I guess that guy was
a real person once.
- He was a bit of a bro,
but yeah, he was all right.
- Bros are people, too.
- Well, that's debatable.
- I think you're just
trying to justify it,
because these people,
they had lives,
and we got them k*lled.
- Yeah, you're right.
Especially because I don't wanna
go back out there
with those stupid men
as they decide what
to do about Theodore.
- Me, neither.
But you and I, we
gotta do something.
We're the only ones
with any sense.
- Yeah, I agree.
You know what?
I think he'd wanna
be buried with that.
- Yeah.
(Aaliyah and Autumn sob)
Yeah, he would.
Rich.
I'm so sorry.
(Autumn sights)
It was my fault, I should
have protected you.
But we hope you're in heaven,
and I know you'd want to be
buried with this boom pole.
And I would've
gotten you cocaine,
but I couldn't find any.
- [Aaliyah] God,
he loved cocaine.
- He did.
- And you know what?
I'm sure there's
cocaine in heaven, so.
- Yeah.
Yeah.
- Let's get outta here.
(Autumn sobs)
I'm sorry, Rich.
Sorry.
- We've gotta figure
out what to do with him.
- We have to k*ll him, you know.
- No, we don't.
There must be another way.
- We already k*lled
Reggie, Nate.
- No, you k*lled Reggie.
Nobody else agreed to that.
- He looks really pale.
Kind of like a vampire,
but a not-sexy one.
- Zoe, why'd you get so close?
He could bite you.
- [Zoe] He's not a zombie, Nate.
He just looks really high.
- [Nate] He's not really
high, Zoe, he's half dead.
- And now he's full dead.
(flesh crunches)
- Charlie.
- What the f*ck, Charlie?
You m*rder*d him!
- No, Nate, I put him
out of his misery.
- You're a psycho.
(soft, tense music)
- You, you, take Theodore,
put him in the closet.
Now!
- Teddy.
Teddy, I'm so sorry, Teddy.
Everybody will remember
your big d*ck energy.
No one will forget it, and
I'm sorry, I shouldn't--
- Whoa, whoa, what
are you doing?
- I just wanna say goodbye.
- No, no, no.
You will turn into
a zombie, Autumn.
You can't do that, okay?
(Autumn sobs)
f*cking smells in here.
We gotta go, come on.
(zombies growl)
- He's dead.
He was good to us.
He was a real friend
of us, and he's dead.
- Ah, he was more
of a client to me.
- We were in this together.
We were supposed to make
decisions as a group.
You just k*lled him
without a second thought?
Forget what I think,
forget what Aaliyah thinks.
- Who caress what Aaliyah
thinks, she's an intern.
- She's a person, Charlie.
And she has lots
of great qualities.
- Oh, yeah?
Like what?
- She's smart.
She's brave.
- Mmhmm.
- She's funny, she's creative.
- And she's got curves,
and she flutters
her eyes at you when
she needs something.
- Hey, it's not like that.
(Charlie chuckles)
Come on, Nathaniel.
Who do you think you're kidding?
- I have pretty
eyelashes, don't I?
- One second Zoe,
I'm talking to Nate.
I'm trying to see if he
has any ba*ls of his own.
- You have very
pretty eyelashes, Zoe.
- Oh, thanks.
- But that's not the point.
We've been surviving these
zombie attacks as a team,
and it's so unfair to everybody
when you just go and make
decisions by yourself.
Is this funny to you?
(Charlie chuckles)
It's not okay.
- Yeah.
Let's get something
straight, shall we?
I'm your boss.
And you're my a*s-istant.
And no matter how cute Zoe
is, or the curves on Aaliyah,
they're still just
f*cking interns.
- Don't say that.
- And Autumn is
just a hoe-for-hire
on a production that
doesn't even exist anymore.
- And the best in the biz.
- Oh.
Autumn, I'm sorry, I
didn't see you there.
- You did, but I'm not mad.
There are more important things
to be mad about right now.
I'll worry about our society's
attitude towards sex workers
when the zombie
apocalypse is over.
Besides, I've seen you
checkin' out this hoe-for-hire.
Don't deny it.
(Charlie chuckles)
- I can't believe you
didn't take Theodore
to the zombie closet yourself.
- It's the apocalypse, Nate.
Everybody's equal, why do I
have to do the heavy lifting?
You're such an as*h*le.
(rod clanks)
Okay, that's it.
I am going to k*ll you!
- [Aaliyah] Hey.
Nate, just step back.
Take a deep breath.
(Charlie and Nate pant)
(Charlie spits)
- I see how it is.
Yeah, just as I said.
Have your little leprechaun
pretty lady manipulate you
into taking her
side and betray me.
- Back up.
- f*ck you, Charlie.
- Hey, hey.
It looks like
you're running hot.
Why don't we go
back to your room?
- It's an office, Autumn.
- Well, your bed
looked really comfy.
I could really use this
stiff one right now.
All this fighting has
made me really thirsty.
- Sure.
Yeah, that actually sounds
kind of fun, kind of nice.
Excuse me.
(Charlie sighs)
Oh God, I just
gotta get my phone.
You know, I'm sorry, Nate.
- Charlie.
- f*ck you.
Call me your assistant
again, and see what happens.
- a*s-istant.
And I think you're forgetting
I've k*lled one people,
I've k*lled two people, you're
gonna be number three, okay?
Enjoy your leprechaun demon.
Come on, Autumn.
You are looking really good, so.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
How do you like the place?
- The sound stage?
- Yeah, I mean, it
cost a lot of money.
I put everything
I have in into it.
It's complicated, but yeah.
- It's really big.
(Charlie chuckles)
- Yeah?
- And tough.
Just like it's owner.
- Oh?
I mean, yeah. I mean,
I'm pretty hard.
I mean, I mean, the permits
were pretty hard to get.
And I, I am, I'm pretty, I
mean, I can get hard, you know?
I mean, I'm,
(Charlie stammers)
- So, on the stage?
- After, yeah, after you, sorry.
You, you, you're really
a very beautiful woman,
so, I'm a little, getting
a little nervous, you know?
Oh, excuse, excuse me.
Okay.
(Charlie chuckles)
Okay.
(tense music)
- [Autumn] Oh yes.
- [Charlie] Yeah,
go for it, yeah.
(Charlie and Autumn chuckle)
(Autumn hums)
Whoa, okay.
I didn't want any anyways, so.
(Autumn belches)
- Oh, that hits the spot.
- [Charlie] Yeah.
- Where did you get it?
- A convenience store?
- I wish there was more.
- Oh, I don't think that
whiskey's anything special.
Whoa, are you okay?
- Is it hot in here?
- Uh, I got--
- Or is it just me?
- Yeah, well I got
central AC, so maybe.
But whoa, are you bleeding?
(Charlie coughs)
- Oh, yes.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
- Oh, yes.
(Charlie cheers)
Why don't your
parents have a zipper?
- Um, my mom bought
these for me.
Yeah.
(pants rip)
- Why are we sneaking
around again?
- I wanna make
sure Autumn's okay.
- She seemed fine, right?
- Once again, you're completely
missing the point, okay?
I can't have a girl
who's having a bad night
leave the crowd
with a total creep.
There are rules, Nate.
- what do you think
is gonna happen now?
- What do you think
is gonna happen now?
- I don't know.
- Of course not.
(Aaliyah sighs)
- Everyone seems upset.
Just gonna get
some zombie strain.
I think Charlie had some.
- No, no, no, no, don't.
If I were you, I
wouldn't go in there.
Zoe, quick, cut it out.
- I need more weed.
- Trust me, if you go in there,
you might not like what you see.
- Why not?
- You might be interrupting.
(Zoe gasps)
Do you think they're?
- Probably, yeah.
(Zoe giggles)
(Nate groans)
- Gross.
Why would she want
do that with Charlie?
- Probably 'cause
Charlie has k*lled, like,
multiple people without
remorse, and she doesn't want--
- Zoe.
- I'm so quiet, I'm a ninja.
- f*ck.
(Nate sighs)
- Hey Zoe, what are
you doing in here?
- I forgot something just
came to grab it real quick.
Don't mind me.
- What?
- Don't focus on her.
Focus on me.
- Are are really gonna
do this with her here?
- I don't mind
having an audience.
What, are you scared?
(Charlie laughs)
- No, I'm not scared.
- Then let's go.
(Zoe gasps)
- Ah, yes.
(Charlie laughs)
- Yeah.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
- This is for Theo.
- What?
- Hey Charlie, take a
couple of deep breaths in
before you finish, it'll help.
- What the f*ck?
Whoa.
- Naughty Charlie.
(Charlie cheers and moans)
- Oh, I think I'm gonna be sick.
- Yeah, I think we
should go somewhere else.
- But what if she's not okay?
- Aaliyah, I think she
decided what she wants to do.
Who are we to say
that she shouldn't?
- But, eh, that's vile.
- Okay, then I guess we'll
stay here, then, just in case.
Hopefully no one throws up.
(Charlie cheers and shouts)
What have you got there, Zoe?
- Nate, it's the jackpot.
(box rattles)
Zombie strain.
You want a hit?
(Nate sighs)
- I almost think that I'm the
one who's wrong about weed.
I thought I needed to
keep my wits about me
in order to stay alive.
Thought that weed
just makes you stupid.
(bong water gurgles)
And I thought you were, I
don't know, a good girl?
(Zoe exhales)
(Super Zombie growls)
(door thuds)
(Super Zombie pants)
(Super Zombie roars)
(flesh oozes)
- I am a good girl.
And I like weed.
(Charlie shrieks)
(suspenseful music)
- [Aaliyah] Whoa, oh.
- [Nate] Whoa, whoa.
(Charlie pants)
- Hey, what happened?
- It's gone.
It's gone.
- What do you mean, it's gone?
- She bit it off, Nate.
(door creaks)
(p*nis bleats)
- Is that?
(Charlie groans)
(p*nis bleats)
(blood oozes)
(p*nis bleats)
- [Charlie] My d*ck.
- Oh, I'm gonna be sick.
- It's okay, it's okay.
- Hey.
Come back here, I gotta
give you back to Charlie.
Don't worry, Charlie,
I'm gonna get it for you.
- Oh, my God.
Zoe, get out of there.
(Autumn roars)
- Hey, don't bite
us, get him, get him.
- No, Charlie.
- Who cares?
Oh, my God.
- I do.
(Autumn shrieks)
- Okay, well, unless
you can stop her
from biting everybody--
- [Nate] It's a trap.
- No, she will bite
him and run away, okay?
He's done for, just,
Nate, I wanna get
out of here alive.
- Shut the f*ck up and help me!
- Okay!
(Autumn shrieks)
(Super Zombie grunts and growls)
(suspenseful music)
(Autumn shrieks)
- Do it.
- Oh, my God!
- Do it, now.
(flesh crunches)
(Aaliyah gasps)
- Oh, sh*t.
(soft, ominous music)
- Guess she is going
in the zombie closet.
(Nate pants)
All right, we got
Charlie settled.
Did you think his d*ck
was gonna be that big?
- Oh, hell no.
I, yeah.
- I mean--
- There's no way.
- If he wasn't such a d*ck,
he probably would've
had a good life.
- Maybe.
Zombie closet?
- Yeah.
- I'm gonna grab her legs.
- Okay.
- All right.
Okay, so.
- All right.
- Alrighty.
- Three, two, one.
- Okay.
- Okay.
- Okay, come on, quick.
Quick, quick, quick.
- sh*t.
How is she heavier than Theo?
- Because she
actually worked out.
Okay.
Oh, you know what?
Why don't you give this
to our new Ken doll?
- Why is this happening to us?
- Honestly, it's probably
something you did, Nate.
- Let's check on Charlie.
- Oh, sh*t, sorry man.
I wasn't thinking.
I deserve that, okay.
(pencil scribbles)
Come on.
- Use this to stop the bleeding.
- Could you please
describe the missing p*nis?
- It's the one crawling
around without ba*ls.
(pencil scribbles)
- Um, idea on
size, width, girth?
Type of blood, A+, A, B, O?
- Big d*ck.
- Any specific beauty marks?
- Nate?
Thank you.
(pencil scribbles)
I'm sorry I've been
such an idiot, man.
And now I'm just like,
I'm a eunuch, man.
I'm a dickless cr*pple, man.
(Charlie sniffles)
- Let's get you out of here.
We need somewhere clean
for him to lie down.
Hey, can you help get
Charlie to the stage?
(Charlie groans)
- Okay, I don't
think that's clean.
I'm pretty sure
Theodore and Autumn
had sex on it before
we k*lled them.
- Honestly, at this point,
I don't really care.
- You don't have anything
helpful to say, do you?
- Has anyone seen this p*nis?
- Stop looking
for his d*ck, Zoe.
It's a zombie now,
so it's probably
dangerous, or something.
And we have more important
sh*t to deal with.
Sorry.
- It's okay.
- This is important.
Charlie's p*nis is probably
just crawling around,
with no one, all alone,
and without a home.
- Well, don't let
Nate find it, okay?
Because he'll make
you stab it yourself.
- Why do I feel like
I'm the only one
trying to help the group here?
And not just being a
self-serving as*h*le.
(Zoe gasps)
- I have something that'll help.
(light bulb rattles)
- [Aaliyah] What?
- [Nate] You can't seriously
be offering me weed right now.
- It's not just weed,
it's the zombie strain.
- I don't give a f*ck!
I don't care what strain it is.
I don't care if it's
indica, or sativa,
or the sunshine and rainbows
strain, or whatever bullshit.
I don't want it.
It's not gonna f*cking
change anything.
Oh, my God.
Everybody's dying.
Charlie's bleeding out, I
don't trust Aaliyah anymore,
because she only
cares about herself.
I can't rely on you,
'cause you're too high
to take anything seriously.
There's no end in sight
to this nightmare.
There could be 50 zombies
outside, for all we know.
I'm scared, Zoe.
I'm scared, I'm terrified
that we're all gonna be
eaten alive, and your
response is to offer me drugs?
It's f*cking insulting.
(soft, acoustic guitar music)
- Okay, but it's not a drug.
It's a plant.
- It's drugs, where I'm from.
- Well, in California you
could buy it at the store.
You don't have to freak out,
Nate, if you don't want to.
I know it might feel
like you should,
because today has been,
like, the worst day ever.
But why freak out?
Is it really gonna help?
- Yeah, who's the as*h*le now?
- It's Charlie's p*nis!
- My d*ck?
My d*ck?
(Aaliyah sighs)
- She's a sweet girl, Nate.
But when you're as
baked as she is,
this probably just feels
like a weird game, okay?
Honestly, I'm jealous.
(Charlie softly grunts)
- You know, there's something
we haven't been considering.
- What?
- Well, when you
were yelling at Zoe,
I was checking my
phone, and it turns out
that there's like a whole
bunch of new updates from,
(Charlie grunts)
doctors and
scientists and stuff,
and they're talking about
like zombies and the virus,
and there's all this
new information,
they're saying it's evolving.
So, I was thinking,
what if there's people
that get bit, and they
don't turn their zombies?
- [Aaliyah] Gimme
a f*cking break.
- Well, you know.
(Charlie coughs)
I'm feeling fine, and so,
maybe I'm not asymptomatic,
and I'm not gonna
turn into a zombie.
- Yeah, perfect,
then you'll just be
an as*h*le with no d*ck,
instead of a zombie
as*h*le with no d*ck.
- Oh, okay.
Okay.
- You know what?
I should just k*ll you right now
before you turn
and try to eat us.
- Uh, no.
No, no, oh, hey.
- I won't let you do that.
- Yeah, you'll try to stop me?
Why?
Look at him.
- Hello.
- Because, what if he's right?
(zombie roars)
(walls thud)
What was that?
- Go check the security cameras.
Go.
You go, too.
You go, too.
- Are you coming?
- Sure.
- [Charlie] Hey Zoe, hey Zoe.
(soft, tense music)
- Oh, that's not good.
- We really have
to get out of here.
- Okay.
- [Charlie] What's
going on, you guys?
Look like you're missing a d*ck.
- Okay, all right.
We got some good news,
we got some bad news.
- Oh, what's the good news?
- Yeah, what's the good news?
- Okay, we don't
have any good news.
I thought you were gonna
ask for some bad news first.
- What?
What?
- Okay. I'm sorry, but there's
a bigger one with them,
and it seems
stronger and smarter.
- Oh no, yeah.
I was reading about those guys.
They were saying there's,
like, variants and stuff.
But hey, that's
kind of cool, man.
Nature, right?
sh*t evolves.
(Charlie chuckles)
You guys should go.
I'll stay.
- All right, I'll stay.
- No, no, Zoe, I'm gonna
say, you're gonna go.
- I'm gonna stay,
you're gonna go.
- No, Zoe, I'm staying,
you are going with them.
' I'm staying, you're
going with them.
- No, Zoe, I'm
staying, you're going.
- I'm staying, you're going--
- No, Zoe!
I'm trying to be heroic, okay?
This is my moment.
What's up, BTS guy?
Nate, look at me, man.
I'm bleeding out.
I got no d*ck.
Like, I'm also bit,
and I'm probably
gonna turn into his zombie soon.
So, if I'm gonna die, I
want to go out fighting,
so I can be up there with Theo,
with all those hot-a*s
Valkyrie babes.
- Damn, Charlie.
It's a shame you had
to go out like this.
- You're full of sh*t, Aaliyah
(Aaliyah chuckles)
- [Aaliyah] So are you.
- You know, like if things
went a little different,
maybe we could
have been buddies.
- Nah.
- Damn, well, you
can go to hell, then.
I mean, I'll see you
there soon, sheesh.
Nate, Nate?
Hello.
- Let's get you
geared up, at least.
- Okay, well, if you're
gonna get me geared up,
can you get all
those action cameras?
Because if I'm gonna
die, I want to go out
really cool and badass,
so people remember me.
- All right, we'll
see what we can do.
- Okay.
That's cool.
Thank you.
Oh, and thank you
for taking the bat.
You can go now, little demon.
- f*ck you.
- Oh, I hate you.
Can I see my d*ck
for a little bit?
Oh, wow.
Oh, it's good to
see you little guy.
- Look.
I have a little vein here.
- Yeah.
- And the blood spurts out
here, but it's not sound.
- Papa's gonna find you,
and you go right here.
- And then, some little
pieces that come on it,
right on.
- You're really talented.
You should pursue this.
- Thank you.
- Hey dude, thanks for
helping out with Charlie.
- Like a fire breathing,
- Mmhmm, just like a dragon.
- You ready?
- Yeah.
- Sad dragon.
- Yeah, let's do this.
(soft, intense music)
- Use this to help
with the pain.
- Oh yeah, okay, this
reminds me of Cabo.
(Charlie groans)
How are we gonna get you?
(Charlie hums and shrieks)
Easy does it, easy does it.
(Charlie groans)
- Why'd you give me
Santa pants, man?
- Because your
pants bloody, dude.
- Well, how am I supposed
to fight with one hand, bro?
(Zoe gasps)
- I have an idea.
- Oh, sh*t.
Well, now this really
reminds me of Cabo.
Thank you, Zoe.
Cool.
Then it zips up.
Very curious, okay.
Oh, be gentle, be gentle.
(Charlie screams)
Oh, f*ck you.
- You definitely wish you could.
(Charlie groans)
Oh, I still got ba*ls, dude.
- Zoe, grab the duct
tape and the pillows.
- Tie me up, guys.
Tie me up.
(tape crunches)
Still here, guys.
Don't worry about me.
Ready to go.
- [Aaliyah] Okay, Charlie.
- Ready to go.
- Duck.
Duck.
- Can I be the goose?
- Get your other
arm through, buddy.
Ah, you guys are nice.
(tape crunches)
I love you guys.
(tape crunches)
Oh, yeah.
(Charlie clears throat)
Oh, I'm still here.
I'm still alive.
(tape crunches)
Oh yeah.
- Boop.
- All right, oh.
(liquid gurgles)
(Charlie sighs)
I look ridiculous.
- It's the best substitute
for armor we could find.
- So you'll last
longer, I even strapped
a little action camera
on there for you.
- Who knows?
Maybe you might even survive.
- Doubtful.
But it's worth a shot.
(wall thuds)
Well, this is it.
Time for you kids to go.
Here.
(keys jingle)
Take my car.
- So, I've gotta do
this before we do this,
'cause I might not
get another chance.
I've been waiting
to do this all day.
Excuse me.
(kiss smacks)
- Oh.
- Uh, thank you?
- Damn, somewhere out there,
little Charlie is hard.
I did not know you
were into girls.
Go figure.
- Did I miss something?
(wall thuds)
- Okay.
Seriously, time
for you guys to go.
(loud, eerie music)
- Let's just get you up.
(Charlie groans)
Come on.
- You still have legs.
- Oh, yeah.
- [Zoe] Bye Charlie.
- Goodbye.
Well, it was nice knowing y'all.
Can you go get the B
cam for me, please?
- Why?
- Because I wanna look really
cool and get some a*s shots.
(Charlie groans)
Okay.
(Charlie cheers)
Come on, come here.
Hey, hey, come on.
(Charlie softly chants)
- I'm gonna miss you, man.
- I'm gonna miss you too, man.
I'm not gonna
remember you, though,
because I'm gonna be dead.
So, remember me, okay?
- Oh yeah, yeah.
- All right, bye.
Hey, you can go, too, BTS guy.
Get out here, man.
- Bye.
- Kind of cool, man.
(Charlie cheers)
Hey, I'm gonna die.
- Bye.
- Come on, Zoe.
Go, go.
(victims screaming)
(zombies hiss and growl)
(suspenseful music)
- [Nate] Where's the car?
- sh*t, zombies.
- It's right there.
- Hey Mom, it's
me again, Charlie.
I know that I call you Kathy,
but I still love you
'cause you're my mom.
Even though, like, when I k*lled
those squirrels, like,
you sent me away.
I mean, I ran away, but
I don't care anymore now.
Not me, Mom.
Goddammit, man
I'm a hero now, I
saved three people,
even though I k*lled squirrels.
I also k*lled two
people, but it's okay.
Woo, let's go!
Oh, my God.
Drop it, Reggie-Reg, I'll
k*ll you again, goddammit.
- Again?
What the f*ck?
What do you mean?
- Reggie?
You're still alive, bro?
- Yeah, man.
What?
Yeah, I'm fine.
I mean, someone hit me in
the head, or something,
but I'm chill, man.
I got up, I was
napping in the closet.
- I'm sorry, dude, I'm so sorry.
- Dude, don't even, don't
even worry about it, man.
Everyone was freaking out
about the zombie thing,
which is obviously, like,
stressful as hell, man.
And I get it.
- Of course he doesn't
have batteries in his key.
- Come on, Nate.
- This isn't helping, Aliyah.
- Oh, it's open.
- Okay, I'm driving.
- No, I'm driving.
- Get in, it's now or never.
(zombies growl)
(Aaliyah screams)
- Get the f*ck out of here.
(zombie growls)
Come on, they're still after us.
- They don't seem to want me.
- But I want you, to
come with me, please.
- But you know, I
realized something right?
Because someone bit me,
probably was a zombie, right?
But like, if I was gonna
turn into a zombie,
that would've
happened hours ago.
But look at me, dude.
Fully asymptomatic.
- Bro.
Oh, man, that means I didn't
have to k*ll everybody.
- What?
- Whoops, whoops.
Whoops, wait.
Okay, Reggie, that means I've
been right about everything,
and I'm a genius,
and I should not,
oh, my God, I should've
smoked zombie strain
instead of the regular
weeded, but Zoe's gonna live.
Oh, cool, cool, cool.
(glass shattering)
- Someone breaking
glass in here, man?
- I think you should come here.
(zombie grunts)
Oh, my God.
(Reggie screams)
No!
Reggie, no!
No!
Okay, let's go!
Let's go, for Reggie!
Goddammit, Reggie
was a cool dude.
He was a dope-a*s intern.
Oh, my god, he was pretty good.
My d*ck, goddammit.
(zombies grunt)
Run for it, Reggie.
(Charlie screams)
(zombies grunt)
- Oh please, can you find
another spot, please?
- [BTS Guy] You're
not gonna let me
hide with you, seriously?
- There's just
not a lot of room.
I don't see any
zombies behind you.
- [BTS GUY] f*ck you guys.
Also, the battery's
about to die.
I hope you guys make it.
If I survive, I'll
send you my invoice.
- I'm sorry.
- sh*t, man, I haven't beaten
off that many guys since Cabo.
(lighter clicks)
(zombie grunts)
Oh, sh*t.
Bro, gimme a second, please.
Hey, man.
You know what?
May have no d*ck.
But I still got ba*ls.
Oh, come on, daddy.
(zombie grunts)
(Charlie screams)
(flesh gurgles)
(Charlie shouts and laughs)
That hurts so good.
- I think I know why the
zombies don't eat me.
- You do?
- I can show you,
but don't be mad.
- Why would I be mad?
- Well, you've been really
stressed out lately.
- Listen, I know.
I'm sorry.
I promise, I won't get mad.
- Okay.
Now, this might seem
silly, but it's really fun
and it feels great, I swear.
Maybe if you have an open mind,
you could try it with me and
we could enjoy it together.
And I can give it to you
as your Christmas present.
(Zoe gasps)
(p*nis bleats)
That's not it,
that's not the pot.
- Why do you have that?
- I found it.
Zombie strain?
- You'll still let me have some,
even after everything I said?
- Of course, it's the best!
- Okay, I've never done
this before, so how do you--
- I'll show you.
(lighter clicks)
(soft, tender music)
(Nate coughs)
- Do you wanna come visit my
parents for Christmas with me?
I think I'm love with you.
- Nate, I think you're
really high right now.
(Nate and Zoe chuckle)
Okay, but seriously,
can we talk about
why you had the zombie p*nis?
(Zoe giggles)
(soft piano music)
(glass taps)
(p*nis softly grumbles)
- So, what do you think?
- I don't remember
a lot of that.
But also, I was really high.
(Zoe giggles)
- Yeah, maybe I should
take some of the gory shots
out of our friends getting
maliciously maimed and m*rder*d.
'Cause that was
kind of f*cked up.
- You know, the way you
edited it, it's kind of funny.
In a, like, gross,
disturbing way.
I mean, I think that's how
other people are gonna see it.
I like it, I do.
But did you have to have
her first kiss in there?
It was a really sweet moment,
but it was our moment, you know?
- It was a really sweet moment,
and it meant a lot to me.
I just wanted the movie to
end on a high note, you know?
'Cause, I mean, we've been
in therapy for a year,
and I still can't get
the blood outta my eyes.
But I think we,
you know, did well.
I think Aaliyah and
Charlie, I feel like
they would've appreciated
this maybe, hopefully.
- Yeah, then you can keep it in.
- Really?
(kiss smacks)
Thank you.
Do you think the admissions
faculty would like it?
- You mean like, the
film school people?
- Yeah.
- Hmm.
I think you'll get in.
(popcorn crunches)
Did you pay the BTS guy?
- Oh, f*ck.
I'm just a zombie,
not really alive
Are you gonna save
me or leave me to die
Runnin' on empty,
no light in my eyes
Are you gonna leave me
or bring me to life
Lying so low,
it's a bumpy ride
Been too long since
you left my side
I'm starvin' for
your paradise
It's critical, give
me just one night
All I need is a taste
Of the one I used to know
Set me free from
the grave, whoa
I'm just a zombie,
not really alive
Are you gonna save
me, or leave me to die
Runnin' on empty,
no light in my eyes
Are you gonna leave
me, or bring me to life
(upbeat dance music)
I get restless
walkin' in my sleep
I'm livin' only when I dream
I see you breathin'
next to me
Next to me
I'm just a zombie,
not really alive
Are you gonna save
me, or leave me to die
Runnin' on empty,
no light in my eyes
Are you gonna leave
me, or bring me to life
(upbeat dance music)
(Charlie blows smoke)
- Got you, b*tch.
(Charlie giggles)
sh*t, I'm gonna die.
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Zombie Strain (2023)
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