[Baby crying]
[Heartbeat]
[Baby coughs]
-[Crying]
-[Laughing]
[Woman screams]
[Birds chirping]
["Summer Holiday" plays on radio]
-We're all going
on a summer holiday
No more working
for a week or two
Fun and laughter
on a summer holiday
No more worries
for me and you
For a week or two
-Sorry, sorry, darling.
Go on, carry on.
-So in 1824,
the whole island
quarantined itself in fear
of a deadly flu pandemic.
-Does it say
how long the quarantine lasted?
-Yeah.
What began as three months
eventually lasted
almost two and a half years!
-Wow. What suffering. Amazing.
-Totally amazing.
-Long after the mainland
had ended the quarantine,
it remained in place
on the island
until most people
had either died
or had turned to cannibalism
to feed themselves
and their children.
-How many people died?
-Oh, it doesn't actually say.
-Bullshit! I need a death toll.
-Hey, language.
Why does it matter
how many people died?
-Actually, I agree with Sam
on this.
It just, it would be nice
to have an exact figure.
-Yeah, I think
I'd give more of a sh*t
if it was 200 people
rather than, say...
-Four?
-Yeah, four.
-Yeah.
-Four people.
-Okay, well,
I heard it was hundreds.
Are you happy?
-Very, thank you.
-Every 10 years, the islanders
celebrate the festival of...
Karantan!
-Karantan!
-Or quarantine, a gory,
eight-hour play --
-Eight f*cking hours!
-Hey, hey!
-Sorry, Dad.
I f*cking hate the theater.
-Mummy, thank you for the info.
-You're welcome, Daddy.
-Gross.
I would never eat a person.
-Why not?
-I'm a vegetarian.
-Oh, here we go. That's right.
-Don't belittle my beliefs.
-Beliefs! h*-h*-h*!
I'm sorry, but believe me,
if you were hungry enough,
you'd eat a man.
-Or a woman.
-Yeah.
-Don't forget about us!
-Sorry.
-[Arguing in Swedish]
-[Arguing in Swedish]
-Sorry, hello.
Sorry to interrupt.
Could we order some food,
please?
-[Speaking Swedish]
-[Speaks Swedish]
-Could I have two hamburgares,
please.
And then two pomme frites,
chips, fries, chips.
And then two very large beers,
please.
And, um, kids, what do you want?
-Yeah, hi.
Sorry, do you have
a veggie burger?
-Oh, God.
-A bun with no beef?
-Yeah.
-[Speaking Swedish]
-[Laughs]
-We have burgers made
from land meat or sea meat.
-Perfect, what's the sea meat?
-Fermented mackerel an*s.
-What...um?
-Just chips, thanks.
-Chips.
-Yes, thank you.
And, Jessie,
what are you having, honey?
-Nothing. I'm not hungry.
-Oh, my God,
you have to eat something.
-I'll eat later.
-Well, do you promise me
you'll eat later?
-No.
-Jessie, where are you --
Oh, my God.
Oh, sorry, could I also --
could I get some cheese
on my burger, please?
-Nej.
-No, okay. Why not?
Where are you going?
-To find Jessie.
-Geez! Sorry.
And sorry about my kids.
They're an absolute nightmare
today.
I think they're bored.
Do you have children yourself?
-Nej. It died.
-Well, of course it did.
-Ooh!
-Hiya!
-Hello, darling.
-Here you go.
-Oh, thank you.
-Does that taste like fish?
Oh! Sorry.
Thank God we have
the table number
so we don't get confused
with anyone else.
-Funny.
-Will you go
and shout for the kids?
-Where are they?
-Oh, my God, Richard,
I don't know.
Use your brain.
-Alright, sorry.
-Where are they?
Do I look like a psychic?
-What do you think happened?
-Don't know.
[Camera shutter clicks]
-Kids, food!
-We should go.
I'm starving.
Ugh! Gross.
-Yeah, eww.
-That was pretty good.
-I don't know.
To me it's like fish. Hello.
-Through?
-Yes, thank you.
-It was lovely,
thank you very much.
-Let me ask, can we buy
tickets here for the ferry?
-Do I look like the ferry?
-No.
-No, I just thought I'd ask.
-Where are you going?
-Oh, we're going to Svalta.
-[Speaking Swedish]
-You cannot go there.
It is forbujdet during Karantan.
-I don't think it is, is it?
-This is Europe, yeah?
-There are no hotels
on the island.
This is the last ferry.
You'll be stranded.
-No, we won't be stranded
because we're staying
on the island.
We've actually booked a B&B.
-Look, hang on.
Here. Have a look.
-Richard.
-Shush.
-That's the house
of Matts Larsson.
-Yes, it is.
It doesn't get more Swedish
than that, does it?
-Yes, it does.
-Why did you show him the app?
-He seemed nice.
-He's not the B&B police.
-I know he isn't. Sorry.
-You don't always have to --
You don't have to apologize
for everything.
-Maybe, but --
-Yeah, but it makes me
the bad one.
-I promise you, you will not
be welcome on the island.
They don't like visitors
at the best of times.
-Oh. Why?
-Foreigners on the island
during Karantan play?
It is like serving
pork chops at a bar mitzvah.
-Would anyone do that?
-Yeah.
-Delicious.
-What's his problem?
-Maybe he doesn't like
vegetarians.
-I'm sure there are
vegetarians in Sweden.
-Ah.
-Stockholm, yeah, sure.
Malmo, Gothenburg, at a push.
-I think it's awful
that anyone would hold
onto a grudge for 200 years.
-Says the Irish lady.
-[Gasps]
[Boat horn blowing]
-The ferry!
-Oh, good. The ferry.
-Yes! Come on!
-[Speaking Swedish]
-[Speaking Swedish]
-Hey!
I'm sorry to interrupt you.
-What?
-Can I pay?
-I don't know. Can you?
-Come on,
I'm in a bit of a rush.
Please, I'm going to
miss the ferry.
-Perhaps that's for the best.
-What do I owe you?
-Hmm...
300 krona.
-Right, um...
I can't --
My hands are so sweaty.
Right, yes.
-Cash only.
-Okay, uh...
One...
Is that one? Yes. Two.
What are you doing?
You're hurting me.
-If you know what's best for
you, don't get on that ferry.
Take your nice family
and get back into your hired car
and f*ck off.
-I said you're hurting me!
I have to leave.
-Don't say I didn't warn you.
-What's wrong? Richard?
I know that look.
What's wrong?
-I'm fine.
-Richard!
-Yes?
-Oh, hello.
Could we order four tickets,
please?
-Four tickets?
-Mm-hmm.
-To where?
-Well, we're going
where you're going, silly.
We're -- Svalta.
-Let's go!
-Well, this is most unusual.
-Come on, Dad.
[Ship's horn blows]
-Sorry.
-What's wrong?
-Oh!
-I think I've left
my blooming wallet inside.
-D'oh!
-Shut up, Sam.
-Sam, just --
Well, then, you numpty,
just go run, run, run,
quick, quick, quick, quick.
-Yes.
-Go, go!
-Yes, yes.
-Go, Richard! Run.
-I'm going.
-We must leave now.
To be late is forbjudet.
After this boat, no more.
-Oh, when's the next ferry?
-In three days,
after Karantan is over.
-So yeah, four return tickets,
please.
-I take your names, please?
-Why do you need our names?
-For our passenger manifest.
In case we sink
and everyone drowns.
-Oh, lovely, of course.
Well, we're the Smiths.
I'm Susan, and this is Sam.
-Just Sam.
-And then this is Jessie.
And then my husband is --
Come on, Daddy!
-Hey!
-And this is Richard,
my husband.
Daddy, come on, the tide.
All okay?
-Yeah, fine.
-Yeah?
-Yes.
-Yes.
Oh, you got some ketchup
on your top, silly.
-Oh, yes. Here we are.
Thank you.
-Thank you.
-Right, let's go!
Come on.
All aboard the Skylark!
-He is so embarrassing.
-We're adopted, right?
-You f*cking are!
[Ship's horn blows]
-What's happening?
-I don't know, Richard,
I don't know.
[Door opens, closes]
-f*ck off!
-f*ck.
It's Johan, the Dane.
-You want to make drink with me?
-Uh...
-That's a nice offer.
We're actually not big drinkers,
are we?
-No.
-I wasn't talking to you,
you f*cking four-eyed p*ssy man.
[Engine revs]
-Um...
-Shall we? Yes.
-I think we could have
a look around the boat.
-Oh, let's.
["Sommar, Sommar, Sommar"
plays]
Sommar, sommar, sommar
Det a r dans i Folkets Park
Sommar, sommar, sommar
Hja rtan ska
rs I tra dens bark
Jag vill viska i ditt ora
[Bell tolling]
-Well, well, well.
Thank you. You honor us!
-No, Richard, don't.
-[Speaks Swedish]
-What?
-Who are you?
Why have you come here today?
-Why are you here?
-It's our holiday.
-Holidagen?
-Yes, but not just a holidagen.
We're also here
to see your wonderful play.
-Play?!
How dare you?
"Billy Elliot" is a play.
"Grease," the musical,
is a play.
This is Karantan.
This is our life.
No play.
-Sorry, I think
we've got off on the wrong foot.
-The kommune has made
a judgment.
You must get back on the ferry
and return to the mainland.
You are not welcome here.
-Right, but --
-Yeah. Sorry for the push back,
we didn't think this was --
It's not a private island,
is it?
-Look, all we want to do is
just see your thing, the show,
and just pay our respects
to the dead.
-The dead?
What do you know of the dead?
-Oh, well, quite a lot actually.
-Mum, just don't.
-No, no, no, no.
Honestly,
they'll find it interesting.
They will find it interesting.
My great, great, great,
great, great grandfather
actually died here
on this island,
on Svalta.
-Who was your ancestor?
-He was the -- well,
one of the brave officers
who your ancestors m*rder*d.
[Murmuring]
-[Growls]
You will leave this place
one way or another.
-Oh! Ugh!
-Sue, Mummy, are you --
-She licked my face,
she licked my face!
-Oh, hey! Hey, hey, hey!
I see you have already met
our friendly kommune.
Welcome to Svalta.
-Thank you.
-I'm -- I'm -- I'm Matts.
They are mostly harmless.
-[Growls]
-Mostly.
-Well, they don't seem harmless.
-Yeah.
-Matts Larsson!
You know these outsiders?
-Huh. Yes.
I have rented them
my mother's house.
-You did not seek agreement
from the kommune.
-This is not your island.
It is not any of your business
who I rent my mother's house to.
This is Sweden, 2024.
[Speaks Swedish]
-The rules of our society
on this matter are clear.
-The rules remain in place
to protect us from people
like this.
-200 years ago.
-Your poor mother
would turn in her grave
if she could see what kind of
a man you have become.
-I hope you'll be
able to tell her about it
in person one day soon.
-Do enjoy your time on Svalta.
It will be short.
-Thank you.
-"Thank you."
God, honestly, I give up,
I give up.
-Okay, come on.
Put your bags on the cart.
We will go now to your house.
-It's fine.
We'll -- We'll push it
ourselves, thank you.
-That's your decision.
-Kids, wait a second.
Hey. You okay?
If you're having
second thoughts,
you should probably
say something right now.
-No, I need this holiday,
Richard.
I need it.
It'll be good. We'll be fine.
-Okay.
-Yeah.
-Good.
-Yeah.
[Ship's horn blows]
-Oh. Shoes off, please.
-Oh, of course.
-You'll find a pair of slippers
here for each of you.
-Do I have to?
I'd rather keep my trainers on.
-It is the tradition in Sweden,
so if you can.
-Well, it's our tradition...
-Feels comfy womfy? No?
-Yeah.
-Alright.
-Comfy womfy.
-I don't understand why
I have to take my trainers off.
-It's our tradition
here in Skane.
Feels comfy too?
-Stop saying that.
My trainers are comfy.
-Just --Just put them on.
-f*ck!
-Shh, shh, shh.
Well, well, well.
This is lovely.
It's very Swedish.
-That's because
we are in Sweden.
-Yeah.
-He's got you there.
-'Cause we are.
[Laughs]
-And you were saying this --
this was your mother's house,
Matts?
-Yeah, she was born here, and
in 1974 she married my father,
right here, on the island.
-God, that is so sweet.
-Yeah, no, no, no,
it was February, minus-25.
Very bad snow.
My mother and her sisters
arrived at the ferry
only to find the sea outside the
harbor wall had frozen solid.
-Oh, what happened?
-Well, in their high heels
and...
big coats,
they walked across the ice.
My father and...
...his brothers met them
in the harbor,
and the wedding went ahead.
-Hmm.
-That is so romantic.
-Yeah.
-And is she still with us,
Matts?
-Sadly, no.
She died 10 years ago, aged 91.
-Wow.
-God.
-I'm sorry.
But she had a lovely, long life.
-Yes, and then she was m*rder*d,
beheaded,
right there
in her favorite chair.
-Oh.
-Jesus.
-Um...
-Sorry.
-Um, Richard,
get up out of the chair.
-Can we go up stairs
and check out our rooms?
-Yeah, of course, of course.
This is your house now.
-Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
-Oh, thank you.
-Just...good.
-Get the f*ck up out
of the chair, Richard.
-Let me take you.
There we go.
-It's about time you got up.
-I want this one.
-f*cking hell, Sam!
[Thump]
-[Groans]
-[Laughs]
-Jesus!
-Dickhead. [Laughs]
[Sighs]
Oh, f*ck sake!
My phone's got no signal, Sam.
-Of course it hasn't!
We've come on holiday
to a Swedish horror film.
-Hej.
Don't be scared.
It's only Matts.
-I'm not scared.
I just didn't hear you come up.
-Oh, I'm almost silent
in my slippers.
-Maybe you should wear
a little bell round your neck.
-Oh, like a young cat.
-Yeah.
That way you can let the
little birds know you're coming.
Now why would I want to do that?
-Meow!
-Meow!
Meow!
-f*ck off.
-[Groans] Dickhead!
-I must go and leave you
to begin your vacation.
-Oh, Matts, before you go,
did you manage to get those bits
of shopping I asked for?
-Oh, yeah, I did.
I put it all away into the
cupboards and -- and the fridge.
-[Speaks Swedish poorly]
-Well, we better get on.
This chicken paprika
isn't going to make itself.
-Yeah. Oh,
I couldn't get paprika.
-Oh, not to worry.
-Or chicken.
-Well, toasties it is then,
Daddy.
-Delicious.
-Mm-hmm.
-Oh!
Wow! These are razor sharp.
-Be careful, Daddy.
-Life must've been so sh*t
before phones.
No wonder they had
massive f*cking wars, right?
So bored all the time.
Nothing better to do.
-Have I got time for a bath?
-'Course you do, darling!
You're on your holibobs!
Go have a nice soak
and forget about your phone.
-Ow! Don't touch me.
Don't f*cking touch me!
Mum, can you tell her?
-Yeah, don't f*cking touch him.
-Not -- Jessie, don't --
[Water running]
[Shuffling]
[Shuffling]
[Shuffling]
-[Snoring]
-[Snoring]
-What's going on?
-Well, I don't know, do I?
How am I supposed to know?
-I don't understand.
What do we do?
-I'm going down there.
-Don't be stupid.
-I am, I'm going down there.
Anyway, I'm not going to
be scared away by these people.
Whatever they are.
We have every right to be here,
Richard.
-We do, but Brexit!
Sus.
-Leave us alone!
There are children
inside sleeping.
And you're frightening us.
So please, just...
Go away!
-[Gasps]
Richard, look.
-What are you doing?
You can't leave that here!
-Well, thanks for your help,
Richard.
-I thought I'd let
you helm this one.
-Oh, cheers.
-Are you cross?
Hey, we talked about this
in couple's counseling.
It's really important,
you know, as a man,
that sometimes I sit back and
empower you, and you did great.
-Shut the f*ck up, Richard.
-Sorry.
-I'm going back to bed.
You can deal with this.
-What do you want me
to do with it?
-Work it out!
-D-- Do we have bin bags?
[Bell tolling]
Hey, morning! You alright?
-No, not really.
-Okay. Um...
Something I can help with?
-Probably not.
-Is this about last night?
-No, what happened last night?
-Forget it.
What's on your mind?
'Cause you know, you can
talk to me about anything.
I won't be shocked, I promise.
Between us,
when I was a younger man,
I used to live in Vienna,
and, uh...
Between us, I used to do
a bit of the old cannabis.
[Laughs]
Ah.
-I feel like
we are being watched.
-What makes you say that?
-So last night
I was taking a soak,
and I could hear noises coming
from behind that big mirror.
-Right.
What kind of noises?
-I don't know, like a shuffling,
a loud crack.
-Alright, well, look, I mean,
it could have been us
moving around.
It's a very old house.
-No. It wasn't that.
[Voice breaking] 'Cause it was
actually quite creepy, and...
-Shh, come here.
-I'm sorry, I just, um...
-It's alright. It's okay.
If you ever hear anything else
again,
just come and wake me up,
alright?
-Yeah, okay.
-You promise?
-Sorry, oh, God. I'm just being,
like, silly, I feel like.
-Joking aside, what I said
before about cannabis...
-Right.
-Don't do it because in --
in the end, for me,
I went a bit mad.
And it wasn't nice.
-Well, no, I-I tried cannabis
once, and, um, not my thing,
it wasn't for me.
I hated it.
-Good.
-So yeah. Cool?
-Cool.
-Cool.
-What is your thing?
-Cocaine and fat dicks.
-[Coughs]
-[Spits]
[Knock on door]
[Lock clicks]
-Hey!
-Oh, hey.
-Can -- Can I come in?
[Chuckles]
This is a bit awkward.
Um...
You didn't happen to see all the
people outside here last night,
did you?
-No. What were they doing?
-Um...It's hard to say.
They were...humming.
It was just really -- really
threatening, you know?
-Hmm.
-Look.
They threw this at us.
-Oh.
-Do you know what it is?
-It's dead.
-Yeah, I know it's -- it's dead,
but...
It also feels a bit
like a warning, you know?
-Yeah, maybe, maybe not.
It could also be this kind of
a traditional welcome here
in Skane.
-Ah, right.
[Birds calling]
Is it a traditional welcome
here in Skane?
-No. It is a warning.
-Ever since we came to Svalta,
we have felt
nothing but unwelcome,
and -- and it's -- it's a shame,
you know,
because the app,
it promised so much more.
And j-- Between us, I'm not --
I'm not a confrontational person
at all, but...
our review is going to be
less than favorable.
-I will take this
to the kommune.
-Thank you. I-I appreciate that.
It's, uh...
It's been a hell of a year.
We need this, you know?
Okay. Thank you.
-Yeah.
-Bye-bye.
-Oh, God, I needed this.
-Hang on.
Here we go, hang on.
No...
That's video. Portrait.
-What are you doing?
-Hang on, let me do it that way.
-Oh, give it to me.
-I love you, Mummy.
-Oh, love you, Daddy.
Can't wait till the big day.
-Ha! Beautiful!
[Camera shutter clicks]
-Okay.
Nice.
Tak.
-[Burps]
[Bird screeching]
-Duck, Richard!
-Ah!
-Or stay still, actually.
-Susan! What do I do?
-Just -- Oh!
You've got to stay still,
Richard!
-Stop laughing! Stop it!
-He thinks
you're one of his eggs!
-What does it want?
-He thinks you're an egg!
-I'm not an egg! Stop it!
-You are!
[Slurping]
-Look, there's a boat.
-Oh. Looks so small.
-That's because
it's quite far away.
-Gimme that.
Oh, look at that.
Do you think that's because
four people have died?
-Not yet.
-Oi! Jessie and me
are going to go for a swim.
-Oh, will you be careful though?
-No.
-Will you be alright
on your own?
-No.
-[Sighs]
Pair of idiots.
-Do you think they're happy?
-Honestly, right now,
I couldn't give a sh*t.
-Do you want a blow job?
-[Chuckles]
What?
-Do you want a blow job?
-[Laughs]
-Hej, Detective.
How is Yanet?
-Yanet died.
-This is the way of life.
It ends.
-It does end.
Have you seen Johan today?
-I saw him getting off the ferry
yesterday.
Very drunk.
Oh, my, this is serious.
He's only just been released.
Have you alerted the kommunity?
-Not yet.
-Klara will want to know.
-[Laughs]
-Oh!
Come on! Oh! Oh!
Oh, Mama.
-Dada.
-Mama.
-I'm sorry to...
-Stop!
How dare you interrupt
my rehearsal?
-m*rder. That's why.
I'm sure you'll understand
death comes before art.
Do you know Johan?
-The Dane?
-Have you seen him today?
-Nej.
-Did any of you see him?
-He left the island.
-Are you sure?
Do you know where he went?
-Probably to the Systembolaget
to get more vodka.
-Thank you for your time.
-Good.
Leave this place
and don't come back.
You have no jurisdiction here,
Detective Forsberg.
In here, the Karantan is judge.
It is our way.
It has always been our way.
-Be careful.
I'd hate for you to do something
rash and lose your head.
-f*ck you!
[Bell jingles]
-Hej! Hej!
We're closing soon,
but would you like
to taste my crispy waffle?
-Waffle? Yes, please!
-Coming here
was a big mistake for you.
-Why?
Are your waffles sh*t?
-How dare you!
[Bell jingling]
[Door closes]
-It's fine, we'll leave.
-Yes, you will.
-Okay, you know what?
We don't want to be here,
mate, okay?
We're only here
because our parents want to see
a stupid f*cking play.
-Not a play!
-Okay, and you know what?
Your waffles look dry as f*ck
anyway.
-My waffles...are moist!
-They don't look it, so...
-Don't f*cking touch me.
-Ah! Ah! Ah!
My eyes!
-Okay, let's f*cking go.
-[Laughs]
[Laughter]
-[Laughs]
-[Laughs]
Oh!
-Oh.
-[Laughs]
-Dickhead.
-I mean, the name plate said,
"English Liars"!
-This sh*t is so weird.
What is happening,
for f*ck sakes!
We should tell the others.
-No, no, don't.
You know, I don't want
Mum to miss the play.
You know,
she's been trying so hard.
Sam, will you put
the kettle...on?
Sam, have you --
have you been in here?
-No, why?
-Um, be honest.
Did you, um --
Did you move my underwear?
-[Laughs]
-You're being shifty as f*ck
right now, Sam.
-I'm not! Sorry! I'm nervous.
-Okay, look, if you took them
to seagull off into,
or have a sniff,
whatever, okay, I don't care.
I just want them back.
They were 22.
-Ugh! Seagull!
Don't be weird.
I'm g*y.
-Oh. Okay, whoa.
Didn't know that about you.
-There's lots
you don't know about me.
-I'm sure there is.
-There are.
[Shuffling]
-You have all worked
very hard the last 10 months.
Well done.
I have worked hard all my life.
It's what I do.
I have been doing this
successfully for many years now,
many Karantans.
But soon my time will end,
and it will be time
for one of you
to become the custodian
of our traditions.
[Applause]
I am proud and honored to say
that I have been shown a way,
and have been given
the opportunity very recently
to close the circle.
-It would be great to have
some clarity about what you mean
when you say "close the circle."
-In years gone by,
we honored the traditions
by sacrificing tributes.
[Murmuring]
-I guess as much as we want to
honor the dead of the Karantan,
the thought
that you would want us to...
-I think what Marten
is trying to say
is that the thought
of having to...
-Speak your mind, Ingemar.
-k*ll again.
It seems very old-fashioned.
I know it was our way
in the past, but now...
-The English arriving here
has solidified my resolve.
It offered me
an unsurpassed clarity.
The English must be offered up.
It will be the greatest
modern Karantan ever.
-I thought we were
just going to scare them off!
-The last time we honored
the Karantan in this way,
we were all much younger.
-I wasn't even born yet!
-The world was different then.
-Was it?
I don't think
it was that different.
I remember you that summer,
Sven Svensson.
You couldn't wait
to k*ll those poor people.
-We won't k*ll and eat people.
We love the Karantan, and our
culture and traditions but --
-You will do what
I f*cking tell you to do!
You will not f*ck
this opportunity up for me.
[Indistinct conversation]
-Jesus.
These potatoes are sh*t.
Jens, do you hear?
-Matts Larsson, how are you?
I assume you received a visit
from Detective Forsberg.
A policeman on the island
at the time of Karantan is bad.
As you know,
a lot of work has gone into
this year's production.
As always.
And the Karantan will go ahead
as it always has.
Our debt must be paid.
You know this.
-Yes.
-Bringing those people here
was wrong, Matts.
The kommune did not approve
such a request,
and look what has happened.
-Why should I have to get
the approval of a kommune
that barely recognizes
my existence?
-Because it is our way.
It is the way of Svalta,
ever since the first Karantan,
Matts Larsson.
You do what you want.
You come and go,
drunk pretty girls, pretty boys.
They arrive laughing.
They leave crying.
We see this.
You pray on weakness, beauty,
you are a pervert,
an alcoholic,
a drug-taking pig.
I make sure
that we turn a blind eye
to these indiscretions.
Do you know why I do this?
Hmm?
Because you are one of us.
That could
very easily change.
Do you understand?
-What do you want?
-It's 200 years
since the Karantan began.
This is a big deal I think.
I feel this anniversary
be celebrated in the old style.
There are some who think that...
About what went before.
They no longer have
the stomach for the old ways.
I think you might. Hmm?
-We haven't done that
for 30 years.
-When the Karantan is
complete tomorrow,
I will come to your home,
and we will put things right
together.
We shall eat roast beef.
The old way.
Perhaps our friends
would like some nice cookies.
Do you have everything
you need for this recipe?
Hm.
[Bell tolling]
-Mmm.
-You know, you moan
about my little plastic bags
of bits and bobs,
but I bet you're glad
I brought
my own teabags from home now.
-Yeah. Absolutely delicious.
-Mm.
-I will never doubt you again,
Mummy!
-Oh! Can I have that in writing,
Daddy?
[Both laugh]
Did you sleep okay?
-Yeah, I did.
-Yeah?
It was deep, and...
-Mm-hmm.
-I just feel
really refreshed here.
You?
-Same. Just relaxed.
-I finished what I was saying.
[Laughter]
-Ah! Hello, g*ng!
-Morning.
-Morning.
-Everything alright last night?
-Yeah, it was fine.
-Let's eat!
-Whoo!
-[Laughs] Daddy!
-Right, I don't want to have
to keep virtue signaling,
but I'm not going to eat this.
-Well, then just eat the egg,
Sam.
-I'm not going to eat
an undeveloped hen fetus.
-Hen fetus? It's a bloody egg.
-You're a bloody egg.
-Don't call me that.
-Sam.
-Don't call me that.
Egg. Why would he say egg?
-Richard, please.
Don't call Daddy an egg.
Okay?
Now, why don't we finish
up breakfast,
and go and get dressed
because today is the big day.
-Yeah.
-Yes.
-Today is the big day!
-Whoo!
-Good news.
I had a little chat
with the kommune,
and they decided
that you guys are more than
welcome to see the play.
They even reserved seats
for you.
-Great, thank you.
Are you not heading out
to see the Karantan?
-Nope.
-Going for a swim
in the harbor.
-I thought you came here
specifically to see the play.
-Not all of it, mate.
-It's eight hours long, babe!
-I guarantee you though,
we shan't miss the cl*max.
-Are you back for lunch?
-Oh, absolutely.
-Great!
I have a surprise for you.
[Man shouts in Swedish]
[Booing]
[Booing]
[Man shouts in Swedish]
[Booing]
[Man shouts in Swedish]
-Nej!
I don't want to
gobble your kaga.
Not while the rest
of the kommune struggles so.
-As you wish.
But know the mainland is
still rife with disease.
Many thousands dead.
Many more dying.
-Oh!
-It will be months
before you get the chance
to eat a moist kargan again.
-[Honks]
[Laughter]
[Booing]
-Why won't you open the harbor?
-As the leader
of this kommunity,
I have decided to keep
the harbor closed for now.
It is for the best.
[Booing]
-[Honks]
[Laughter]
-But for how long?
We can't take this much more.
-Our English friends
shall let us know
when it is safe
to lift the Karantan.
[Booing]
[Laughter]
[Booing]
-That was sweet!
-Now perhaps I will feast
upon your sweet Kaga.
-Nej!
[Applause]
-Splash, Daddy!
-That's enough.
-Sam! Sam, come on!
-You get one!
And you, and you!
-Stop!
-Oh, grow up.
-I...
have received word
from our English friends.
[Booing]
I'm afraid the Karantan
must endure.
-[Shouts in Swedish]
-Nej!
-Our children and families
are dead.
We are weak
and many are close to the end.
-People have started
to eat the dead.
-I didn't know they were dead!
[Laughter]
-Oh! Oh, that's nice.
Looks like it's time
for a cup of tea and...
-Together: Biccies!
-Yay.
[Booing]
-Traitor!
-Turncoat!
-Traitor!
-Soon the whole island
will be dead.
And who will profit then?
-What's wrong, Mr. Larsson?
Are you losing the stomach
for it?
I think not.
[Laughter]
-I have let friends die.
Wives have lost husbands.
Fathers have buried children.
Why?
There is no disease!
-Nej!
-I never imagined the horror
our deal would bring.
-What did you think
would happen, old thing?
-They grow thin and weak
while you grow fat and rich.
-Nej! Nej!
-Nej!
-Rotten turncoat!
-Ohh!
[Cheers and applause]
-Hmm.
-Hmm, these are unusual.
-Hmm.
-Gross.
-Oh.
-They're really dry.
I think that's...
-You could...
-What? Dry! f*ck you.
Yeah, dig in. Enjoy.
[Cheers and applause]
-Your lies will weaken us
no more.
You will suffer
as we have suffered.
-Might I beg your pardon
for one last wish
before you pass
your final judgment?
-Yor!
-God save our gracious King
Long live our noble King
-God save the King
Send him victorious
Happy and glorious
Long to reign over us
God save the King
Thy choicest gifts in store
On him be pleased to pour
Long may he reign
May he defend our laws
And ever give us cause
To sing with heart and voice
God save the King
-Please, no!
Please!
-Oops. [Chuckles]
Rest assured, Matts,
you'll be getting a big thumbs
up from us on the app.
-No, no, no, no.
-Goodbye, Matts.
-Mama! Mama!
[Screaming]
-[Screams]
[Cheers and applause]
["Run to the Hills" plays]
[Cheers and applause]
-Help!
[Screaming]
White man came
Across the sea
He brought us pain
And misery
He k*lled our tribes
He k*lled our creed
He took our game
For his own need
We fought him hard
We fought him well
Out on the plains
We gave him hell
But many came
Too much for Cree
Oh, will we ever
be set free?
-What is happening?
-People are being k*lled!
-Who would attack us here?
-We should leave, find shelter.
There must be a boat
in the harbor we can use.
-I am not running away.
This is a moment to cherish.
My last Karantan,
my best Karantan.
I deserve all the --
-I am going to try
and call the Polargen
from the harbor office.
-f*ck the Polargen!
-It's Johan the Dane!
He's going to k*ll us all!
Run!
-I can't stay here.
Come with me.
-I can't.
-Then good luck.
-Run to the hills
-Ah!
-Hello.
-[Grunts]
-Run for your life
Run to the hills
-[Groans]
-You okay?
-I am so unfit.
I'm bloody Kate bushed.
-I really wish you'd kept up
street jazz
with me and Mandy,
you know.
-I f*cking hate street jazz!
-Run for your life
-Yeah, but you were getting
really good at it.
-Alright, maybe.
-What shall we do now?
-Oh, God!
This is your slaycation.
What do you want to do?
-Clyde River Paradigm!
-Yeah!
-Come on!
-Whoo!
-Sorry, Daddy. Look,
I'm not trying to stress you,
I just worry about
your shoulder.
-Oh, I'm alright.
-I hate feeling like a nag.
-Hoo.
-You know?
-Yeah.
-And if you strengthen up
that back, then everything else
becomes easy.
-Welcome to the harbor
office communication center.
[Laughs]
-Do you want to cry this time
or shall I?
-I thought you couldn't cry
on your meds.
-Obviously actual tears
can't come out,
but it'll look like I'm crying.
-Shall I, like, pretend
to comfort you?
-f*ck no. Don't touch me.
-Okay, f*cking sorry.
-It's okay, I --
I appreciate you asking.
-Cool, bro.
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
-[Hyperventilating, sobs]
-Ready?
-Yeah.
[Laughs]
-[Laughs]
-What?
-Let's do Mumma, Mumma.
Let's do Mumma, Mumma.
-Yeah, yeah, okay, okay, okay.
Mumma! Mumma!
[Pounding on door]
Mumma, Mumma, Mumma!
Mumma!
-Please help us!
-My poor children!
Come in!
-There was a strange man!
-Hide from the monsters.
[Knives plunging]
-Run to the hills
Run for your life
-We are the monsters, babes.
[Camera shutter clicks]
[Man shouts in Swedish]
Yeah, hmm.
-I'm bored.
Alright, let's f*ck
this place up.
-f*ck yeah.
-Please, Klara, come with me.
We have to hide.
-I don't have to do anything,
Sven Svensson.
This is my island,
and I assure you
everything is fine.
-[Screaming]
-I am going to pay a visit
to my friend Matts Larsson.
-[Screams]
-Jesus Christ.
[Glass breaks]
-So pretty.
-It's not pretty, it's bad news.
-I wasn't talking
about the flare.
-[Chuckles]
You're a cheese ball.
-k*lling
k*lling
-Mama loves a-k*lling
Mama loves a-k*lling
with you
-[Groans]
[Panicked Swedish radio chatter]
-This is Kristianstad
Harbor Control.
Please, one at -- One at a time!
-We are at siege, please!
-Go, go! Hide, quick!
-Go, go, go, go, go!
-Hey.
What do you want to do?
-Hmm, I think we should see
how many we trap,
and then we pounce.
-Yeah.
-And then we can set
this sh*t on fire, baby!
-Hey, kids. You having fun?
-Yeah, having a ball!
-Ugh! My photos won't upload
to the Slay-cation App.
-Hmm.
It's like someone's smashed up
all the comms equipment,
isn't it?
-f*ck.
-That flare was pretty,
wasn't it?
-Yeah, yeah, it was.
-Love you.
-Put your d*ck away, Dad.
-My -- my d*ck?
-Yes, your willy,
hanging between your legs.
-Oh!
-Ooh!
-Right, let's go grab
ourselves a Swede.
-f*cking veggies.
-Open this door at once.
You know how I get
when I'm hungry.
-It's for your own good, Klara.
-[Growls]
Has anyone seen Ingemar?
-I saw him heading down towards
the Vandrarhem some minutes ago.
-f*cking coward.
Just like his fat mother.
-We have seen a lot
of death and suffering.
We must leave here,
find a boat, and go.
-I am not leaving my island!
[Pounding on door]
Get back!
It is Johan the Dane!
-I need to whizz so badly!
-[Laughs]
-What?! Richard,
you're a homicidal maniac.
Just piss yourself.
Be a man about it.
-No, it's weird. It's weird.
-What?! Just --
Who gives a sh*t?
-[Laughs]
-Stop it! No, I'm not a lunatic.
I'll be all wet then.
-No, stop it!
Daddy doesn't want
to wet himself.
-I'm going to cry!
[Pounding on door]
-Who's there?
-Johan is going to k*ll us!
[Pounding on door]
[Crying]
[Screams]
[Knife plunges]
-[Gasps]
f*cking Danes.
-Hey, got one!
-Ta-ta!
-Yeah!
-Yeah! Come on, Daddy.
-Klara.
f*cking Danes.
-[Screams]
["Monsieur Kannibal" plays]
Oh! Oh!
-Oh, that is deep!
-Oh, my, he's knocked one
of my crowns out.
-Oh!
-[Speaks Swedish]
-[Grunts]
-[Grunts]
-[Screams]
-No, no!
No! No!
-Uh-oh!
Hee-hee-hee-heehee!
Ah!
Silly goose! [Laughs]
-Mummy?
-Marten.
Oh, thank Grud.
When I saw the flares --
-Your waffles look dry as f*ck.
[Door closes, lock clicks]
-f*ck it.
[Grunts]
-Oh, oh.
Please. Please, no.
Please don't!
-[Chuckles]
Hmm. That was good, wasn't it?
-Yeah.
-Okay, come on.
Let's get back to it, yeah?
And you.
-Are you alright?
-I need to do a --
I need to do a toilet.
-Oh! Okay, got it, got it.
Out of here.
[Zipper unzips]
[Urinating]
[Cellphone rings]
-This better be good.
-Forsberg, hello?
Forsberg, are you there?
Hello, Forsberg!
-Hello?
-This is Agnes
at Harbor Control.
You need to listen up!
-Yeah.
-Really good.
Svalta is under siege!
Many people are dead.
-Yeah?
-The town is burning!
It's a m*ssacre!
-Is this a f*cking joke?
-A real f*cking m*ssacre!
-A m*ssacre in Svalta?
-Yes, you're correct!
-Have you been smoking meth
again, Agnes?
-Johan the Dane
has been spotted on the island.
I am serious.
-Wake Peter.
-Why?
-Tell him I need Lucky Linda.
-What does Peter
have to do with --
-Tell Peter I need Lucky Linda.
Do it!
-Johan just went
f*cking berserk!
Everything is on fire!
-Hmm.
The smell reminds me
of our honeymoon.
-Mm. Kasiruta.
-Kasiruta.
-Mm-hmm.
-God, it was so romantic.
-Mm.
-Hey, do you remember when
you pegged me with that guy's
fat dismembered willy?
-[Laughs]
Yeah, I do.
-Disgusting.
Give it a break, Jesus.
-You eff off, Sam.
It was nice before you arrived.
-Why don't you f*ck off, Dad?
-You should checkity
check yourself, boy.
-Should I?
-Yeah, you should.
You got on my f*cking t*ts
this trip.
-Have I?
-Yeah, you have.
-f*ck you, Richard.
-Yeah, f*ck you too, Sam.
Or should I say Ian.
-[Gasping]
-I'm f*cking sorry we invited
you back after last time.
-Why did you do that?
-Oh, my God!
-That is so naughty.
-Why? Okay, why.
His attitude generally is sh*t,
his characterization is 2-D
and cliche at best,
and his personal hygiene is
absolutely f*cking disgusting.
-It's because I have AD...HD.
-Yeah.
Well, now you got D-E-A-D.
-Well done.
-Brilliant, Richard, brilliant.
-And who is going to have to
sort all of this out?
Muggins over here. Muggins.
-You know, I just wish
that we could talk about things
before it gets to this point.
-Exactly.
-You know what I mean?
Just before.
-Yes, yes, yes
because I'm the one
who's going to have
to spend two hours
on the phone
to international clean up,
whereas what
I really want to be doing
is very simply going around,
k*lling a few people,
and then sitting down and having
a nice, cold glass of ros.
You can you understand that,
can't you, Richard?
-Yes, yes.
-You know what the worst thing
about all this is,
is now we have to go out and
source an entire new brother,
and that's a task.
-Alright, I get --
I'm sorry, alright?
But just hear me out, alright?
-Do we forgive him?
-Um...
[Fake whispering]
-Okay, stop teasing me!
You're not really whispering.
-Okay, let's go back
to the house
and have a nice cup of tea.
Come on.
-Oh, yeah!
-Ah.
-Come on, Daddy, come on.
-[Clears throat]
Now who's a f*cking egg?
-Klara, Klara, wait.
You're still determined
to pay tribute?
-Perhaps that it is the want
of the Karantan.
-Enough! There is little room
for these old ways.
-Sven Svensson, I love you.
I could not have wished
for a better son.
When you are in charge,
you can do whatever you want.
But tonight, this is for me.
Help me complete the Karantan.
-I will make a tribute
with you one last time.
Just let me go to my home
and get my shotgun.
[Laughter]
-I know.
Ah, God.
-Go, go, go, to Matts' house.
Quick, Daddy.
-I f*cking told you!
-Yeah. Yeah, you did.
-Disgusting, that pervert.
I'm bloody glad we
brutally m*rder*d him now.
-Oh, yeah.
-Me too.
Where do you think this leads?
-Obviously it leads back
to the house, Richard.
-Yeah, no, I know.
I'm just trying
to be rhetorical.
-Oh, sorry, sorry.
I didn't get that, sorry.
-How do you want to do this?
-Well, Daddy...
You know there's someone
I've been very impressed
with this week.
-Who's that, Mummy?
-It is someone who is
a very good girl indeed.
-Oh.
-And who is blooming into
quite the lovely young lunatic.
-Stop it! [Laughs]
-I wonder
where she gets that from?
-I think that, um...
I think that Jessie is ready
to lead her first Trojan Horse.
-Yes! Yes!
-Well deserved. Well done.
Well done, you.
-Do you really want to do that?
-Go on,
I'll meet you round there.
-f*cking love you guys! Whoo!
You coming?
-No, I'm going to...
I'm just going to put my feet up
and watch it on the telly.
-Alright, I'll see you there.
-[Whimpers] Help me.
[g*nsh*t]
f*ck! Wait, wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait!
He k*lled them!
-Bullshit!
-No, no, no, no, no, he k*lled
my dad, he k*lled my brother.
[g*n c*ck]
Okay, okay.
-Who? Who did?
-Matts Larsson.
-Matts Larsson?
How? When did he do this?
Why?
-[Crying] I don't know,
I don't know.
He just went berserk.
I've lost -- I've lost everyone.
-What do you know about loss?
Ha! You will know.
-What did you say?
Okay, come, come, come here.
-What is it?
-He's still here.
-I must check the rest
of the house.
-No, no, no, no,
just please don't!
Please don't leave me on my own!
I'm -- I'm so scared!
I'm so scared! Please don't!
[Whimpers]
-Tell me, girl.
Where are your family now?
Where are their bodies?
-He ate them.
-[Gasps]
He better not have!
[Pounding on door]
-No, no, no, no, don't!
Don't, don't open it!
Don't open it.
It might be a psychopath.
-You let me in!
You witch, you let me in!
Get away from my baby!
Baby? Baby!
-Mummy!
-Baby!
It is a psychopath.
-Oh, no!
-Hara gud.
-[Groaning]
-Hej?
Hello?
-Please help me.
[Crying]
Sucka!
[g*nsh*t]
-[Screaming]
Mummy!
-Sven Svensson!
Come down this moment.
Sven Svensson!
-Ah.
-They blew my f*cking hand off.
-Oh, Daddy!
You're going to have to wank
southpaw now.
-No, no, no, it's too soon,
it's too soon.
-Sorry.
-Hello.
Ah?
-It was you! The English.
Of course.
History repeats itself
once again.
The English lied to our Larsson.
I now realize
that the Karantan itself was
but a dress rehearsal.
This is the real performance.
[Screams]
[g*nsh*t]
-They k*lled my boy!
-Mama! Mama!
-They took the hand
I write with.
-We need to leave.
Right now. Go!
-Yes.
-Yes.
-Oh, come on, Daddy.
-Go!
Yeah.
-Oh, baby girl.
-Excuse me.
Come on, baby.
-Oh, oh.
[expl*si*n]
["I Eat Cannibals" plays]
-That's Johan the Dane!
-He's getting away!
-I eat cannibals
-Freeze!
[g*nshots]
-Feed on animals
Your love is so edible to me
I eat cannibals
-That was the best holiday ever.
-Well, you know what they say,
g*ng.
The family that slay together...
-Stay together!
-[Laughs]
-Daddy.
You're a cheese ball,
but I love you.
-I'm never gonna stop
Fancy a bite
My appetite
Yum, yum, gee, it's fun
Banging on a different drum
And I eat cannibals
Feed on animal
Your love is so edible to me
I eat cannibals
I eat cannibals
It's incredible
You bring out
the animal in me
I eat cannibals
You got the spice
Tasty and nice
Roastin' vitamin
Forget the dietin'
Ooh, such a dish
I can't resist
Healthy recipe
What you got is good for me
All I wanna do
Is make a meal of you
We are what we eat
You're my kind of meat
I got a hunger for your love
You're all I'm thinkin' of
So give the world a bone
'Cause I got steak at home
I got steak at home
'Cause I eat cannibals
Feed on animals
Your love is so edible to me
I eat cannibals
I eat cannibals
It's incredible
You bring out
the animal in me
Cannibals
I eat cannibals
It's incredible
-k*lling
k*lling
-Mama loves a-k*lling
Mama loves a-k*lling
with you
-k*lling
k*lling
-Daddy loves a-k*lling
Daddy loves a-k*lling
with you
-I love you.
-Je t'aime.
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Get Away (2024)
Moderators: Maskath3, GabrielAlejo2341, sidolanters