01x18 - A Horse for Old Hickory

[bunniefuu]

♪ Jim Bowie, Jim Bowie

♪ He was a bold adventuring man ♪

♪ Jim Bowie, Jim Bowie

♪ Battled for right, with a powerful hand ♪

♪ His blade was tempered and so was he ♪

♪ Indestructable steel was he

♪ Jim Bowie, Jim Bowie

♪ He was a fighter, a fearless and mighty adventurin' man ♪

- James, my boy.

- Why Senator Holcombe.

- How are you?

- Fine sir, just fine.

I was about to have some dinner.

Would you do me the honor of joining me?

- Well since I'm your public servant, tis I who am honored.

- Just home on the summer recess, Senator?

- Yes, and a welcome relief, James.

Not that I mind fighting the good fight

up there in Washington, mind you.

But, I much prefer New Orleans.

Mingling with the people, who I love and whom I serve,

learning their wants and their desires.

- In times like these, I doubt if the people

can ask for anything more.

Sure looks like prosperity has turned the corner.

- Turned the corner?

My boy, it is marching down the street.

Bands are playing, flags waving.

Truly democracy's golden age.

- Yes sir, you gotta give Andy Jackson a lot of credit.

- Precisely what I said to him, before I left Washington.

Andy, I said, you have not only brought prosperity

to your friends, you've even brought

comfort to your enemies.

- You call him Andy to his face?

- James, my boy, Andy and I have been poker playing friends

since the Battle of New Orleans.

And a very rough man with a full house, Old Hickory.

- Yeah, I voted for him.

And for you to Senator.

In fact, I stomped up and down Saint Landry's Parish,

making speeches for both of 'ya.

- Such loyalties should not go unrewarded.

And what would you say, if I put it within your power

to do a great personal favor

for the President of the United States?

- Me do a favor for Andy Jackson?

- A personal favor, son.

Interested?

- Well who wouldn't be.

- Now, this will have to be strictly confidential.

Did you ever hear of that great race mare called Mazepa?

- What Judge Newhall's spinner?

Who hasn't, she's won every time out.

Gone away.

Hey, has the President got his eye on her?

- Shh!

He wants that mare, more than he wanted to be President.

Just before the last election,

Andy Jackson was supposed to sell his racing stable

and his interest in the Clover Bottom Race Track.

It just didn't seem right for the President

to own a racing stable, you know.

But, there are those of us,

the poker players, you might say,

who'd know that Andy never parted with his old Truxton,

his favorite stallion.

Now, do you follow me?

- Buy a Truxton, hide him in Zephyr.

- Exactly.

There isn't a red-blooded sportsman in America,

who wouldn't give his oil to present

that mare to the President.

- He just about have to give his all to,

to get a horse like Mazepa.

- Uh, James, you should know by now,

that Andy Jackson has a very deep sense of gratitude.

So deep, in fact, that his enemies,

are trying to make this virtue seem like a vice.

- How's that?

- By libeling his loyalty to friendship,

with the infamous label, a spoils system.

You follow me?

- You mean, I do something for him,

and he does something for me.

- Precisely.

Now the purchase of this fine mare, Mazepa,

would be more in the nature of an investment,

than a gift, you understand?

I just happen to know that the Office of Collective

of Customs of New Orleans, will be vacated soon.

Now the right word, whispered to the very receptive

ear of Old Hickory.

- What's in this for you, Senator?

- I'm a politician.

You're a very influential man, I want you on my side.

- I see.

I don't know anything about shipping.

- Squash, James, don't be so naive.

This is an office that is more honorary than functionary.

An appearance, once or twice a week.

A signature, now and then, on a document.

Think of the prestige, my boy.

Not to mention, the fortune, for the man of your talents.

[vocalizing]

- We'll have the money cash, Judge.

Now, why won't you take my three thousand dollars

and I'll bring the rest out for 'ya.

- It's cash on the barrelhead, Mr. Blanderhassen.

- Tell you what. - I said cash!

[vocalizing]

- Don't you sell her Judge, I'm coming back.

[vocalizing]

- Judge Newhall, sir, my name's Bowie.

Jim Bowie.

And this here's Mazepa.

- Like to see her step?

- Oh, I seen her step Judge, many times

with money on her.

That's the fastest gray mare I ever saw.

Yes sir, I'd like to do some horse tradin'.

- There'll be no chapping, sir?

I would consider it downright insulting

to this noble animal to chapper over price.

So, after careful calculation, I have arrived

at what I believe a fair and reasonable value.

The final compromised figure for the mare, Mazepa

is nine thousand dollars, cash on the barrelhead.

Take it or leave it, hmm.

- Well, don't you worry Judge, I'll get it.

- I ain't going a prodigal son, I'm kinda enjoying it.

Yeah.

Wondering which one of you gentleman,

gonna get here first with the money.

Monday morning, that is.

- I'll be here before then.

Yes, ma'am!

I spent what little remained of that eventful Saturday,

in combing the gambling rooms and taverns in New Orleans,

for a friendly face, one that just might possibly

have six thousand dollars in its money poke.

But, my hope wore thinner as the evening wore on.

Toward midnight I was back where I had dined

with Senator Holcombe, The Black Dog Tavern.

The favorite hangout of pirates and politicians.

Sam Houston.

- Jim, how long has it been.

- Am I glad to see you.

- The feeling's mutual, my friend.

- I've been looking for a friendly face, all night.

How are 'ya?

What'll you have to drink?

- Oh no, I got a bottle of Longahugh,

all cracked in the table.

Come on, sit down.

Sam Houston's streak.

- Well, you just back from Texas, Sam?

- No, I'm plumb wore out from Washington, friend.

What a hoopty-do they got going on up there.

Indians to inkwells, it's all politics, my friend.

Nothing but politics.

- Hey Sam, you're not?

You haven't suffered any reverses have you?

- Reverses?

Sam Houston's doing fine, my friend.

As a matter of fact, I've got a little speculation

going right now.

I'm gonna put my own money in.

The only thing is, it's a cash deal

and I need about 6,000 dollars more,

than I got right there.

You wouldn't happen to have that much around,

would you Jim?

- You know Sam, life's a very funny thing.

I was just figuring to ask you for a loan,

of the very same amount.

- No.

- Yeah.

- What would you be wanting 6,000 dollars for?

- Speculation, like yourself.

A little flyer.

- Got any idea where we might find it?

- Nope.

I've been drag tailing from tavern to tavern, all night.

Not a nibble.

- Tragedy of your defeat is equaled only

by your friend Houston's.

- Sam, I been just thinking.

- I was thinking.

Go ahead. - No, no.

After you go, what were you gonna say.

- Do you have any cash at all?

- 3,000 dollars.

And you?

- A large amount.

You wouldn't consider a toss of the coin would 'ya?

Your poke against mine?

- Well, that's a tempting offer, Sam.

- Call it.

- Nope, I can't do it.

This deal I'm in on, it's a matter

of grave personal concern, you understand?

It's a point of pride and honor.

- Aw, come on, Jimmy, you're not gonna

get the rest of the money anyway.

Now call it!

- The answer is no, Sam!

- Who might they be?

- Lafitte's men, probably.

- Lafitte?

I thought he told you to get out of town or join him.

- I'm still here.

- So's Lafitte?

- Hereabouts.

- Your imagination can play strange tricks

on a disparaging mind.

- He might be just the one man in all of New Orleans.

- Pirate would have nothing to do with banks.

- He'd keep all his money close by, at all times.

- And in cash, which is just the way I need it.

- Me, too.

He's our man, he's gotta be.

- Can you get to him?

- Waiter?

This is my treat, Sam.

- No, no, it comes Sam Houston.

- No, no, I'm in your debt for your brilliant idea.

- Yeah, but we couldn't get to him, without your contact.

- Very well then, sir.

My pleasure, your treat.

- Come on, Jimmy boy!

[vocalizing]

- Sunday's sunrise, found Houston and me

still bent on the same mission,

that began at The Black Dog Tavern, the night before.

In fact, we were more bent than ever.

Seeing that we would now have to ask

for considerably more gold.

- Hold back, monsieur.

- We're looking for Captain Jean Lafitte.

- And who are you, that would want to see the great Lafitte?

- Jim Bowie.

- Now, if you are truly this man, Bowie,

there would be a certain knife.

- I'm so sorry, monsieur.

But, the knife in itself, it proves nothing.

[vocalizing]

- It is not everyday Lafitte has the honor

of pouring ale for so distinguished a guest.

No offense, Mr. Bowie.

After all, Monsieur Houston is a friend of my friend,

Andrew Jackson, President of the United States.

- Well then, gentlemen, let's drink to the President.

- To President Jackson.

Here it is, now we will hear what

the President wrote of me.

Apprentice, who have refused to become

the associate of the enemy in w*r,

upon the most seducing terms of invitation

and who have aided to repair his hostile invasion

of the territory of The United States

can no longer be considered as objects of punishment.

But, as objects of general forgiveness.

That is what I am.

An object of general forgiveness.

So you see, Mr. Bowie, you are a bold man

to ignore my offer of friendship.

Perhaps you have come to accept it, huh?

- Thank you Captain, but I still prefer

to be my own man.

- Well then, what brings you to my humble place?

Business or pleasure?

- Business.

- In that case.

The nature of your business?

- A loan.

- For you Bowie or for you sir?

- For both of us.

- A separate loan for each of us.

One for Bowie and one for Houston.

- And the amount?

- Nine thousand dollars for my, Captain.

- A similar amount for me, sir.

Of course, I'll give you my personal note

as security, for the loan.

- And mine too, naturally.

- Hardly necessary, from two such illustrious gentlemen.

I shall see my treasurer about it, at once.

My devoted friends outside are in need of money, Pierre.



- 18,000, what, Mon Capitan?

- Dollars, of course.

- But, Mon Capitan, don't you remember only yesterday,

for the 3,000 you entrusted to Chighizola

for the special purchase?

Even for that slight amount, Mon Capitan,

we scrapped the bottom of the sea chest.

- Aye, so we did.

But, what of the Spanish merchantmen

we captured, with the cargo of silk and sherry wine?

Has that not been sold?

- It should be soon, Mon Capitan.

But, that was months ago.

As of now, just 18 pennies.

- Oh.

Monsieur, my regret is only exceeded by my embarrassment.

I find myself unexpectedly short of funds.

It is the off season for pirating, hurricanes, you know.

- You mean, you have nothing?

- Not even enough for?

For one of us?

- Gentlemen, if I had so much as a dollar,

it would be yours.

Everything else I have is yours.

If you will avail yourself of my hospitality.

I am sure that when the winds die down,

enough money will arrive for a 100 speculations.

- When the wind dies down, it'll be too late.

- I'm afraid so.

But, don't you feel bad, Captain, you did your best.

- You gentlemen cannot remain, ay?

- Well, as a matter of fact.

- As much as we'd like to.

- I shall speed my departing guests.

The gentlemen's horses.

- Captain.

- Now look, hold the men here, until I give the signal, ay?

- Chighizola has returned, he is my first lieutenant,

my confidant, my good right arm.

- Ah, Mon Capitan.

- Chighizola.

Oh, you remember Mr. Bowie?

- Hi, Chighizola.

- And this is Mr. Houston, former Governor of Tennessee.

- I have a surprise for you, my leader.

Perhaps I should wait until.

- Uh-uh.

These are friends of General Jackson and of mine.

You may speak freely.

- Ah, in that case.

To savor the essence of enjoyment

from this bouquet of pleasure, Mon Capitan,

you must be completely at ease.

- Pray gentlemen, enjoy this with me,

it will not take long.

- And now, Mon Capitan, allow me first

to return to you the sum of 3,000 dollars,

which you entrusted to me yesterday.

- But I do not understand.

- Oh, it was not sufficient for our purpose, Mon Capitan.

- It wasn't?

But how?

- Patience, Mon Capitan, patience.

You gave me 3,000, we needed nine.

I have tripled it.

Look, in this pouch, 3,000

and 3,000, in this pouch.

Making a grand total of 9,000.

- Bravo, Chighizola.

- Whoa, now. - Whoa, now.

- Wait a minute.

That's my money.

And this is Houston's, stole from us last night.

- And we got the lumps to prove it.

- Yeah.

My own mother made that poke,

I'd recognize it in a thousand.

- And this poke was beaded for me

by a certain Cherokee lady.

- Is this true, Chighizola?

- But, I.

I did not know, Mon Capitan.

Believe me, I assure you, I did not know

that this was the money.

It was Dominique.

It was he and I.

- Silence!

A thousand apologies, monsieur.

What a day of embarrassment.

Take back what is yours.

- It was a natural mistake, my friend.

It could happen to most anyone.

- Fool!

You not only steal from the wrong people,

but you have not done with the money as I have ordered.

- Oh, but I have done as you ordered, Mon Capitan.

Behold!

- Mazepa.

I saw here just yesterday.

- This is your speculation?

- Jim, my friend, I better make a clean breast

of this whole thing.

- Yeah.

- President Jackson sent me down with 10,000 dollars

to buy that mare.

But, on the steamboat coming down here,

I held four jacks.

It cost me, it cost the President 7,000 dollars

to find out that a man named Sterdivent held four queens.

Why did you want it?

- Also for the President.

- Just what did you use for money.

- Well I, I went with the full intention

of buying the mare, Mon Capitan,

but when I saw her, so beautiful, so priceless.

The thought of paying dirty money for her,

seemed sort of sordid.

So, I.

I simply took her.

That way you have the money and the mare and this is.

- Stuck 'em!

Horse thief!

We give the President of the United States a stolen horse.

Here!

Pay Judge Newhall what we owe him,

before I lose my temper and run you through.

And bring me a receipt!

- Hey, that's our money!

- I have merely borrowed it yet, men.

You will both receive my promissory note.

- But, I don't recall giving you permission

to use my money.

That mare's as much mine as she is yours.

- The mare is mine, monsieur.

Bought and soon to be paid for.

- I didn't loan you any money either.

One-third of that mare's mine.

- Gentlemen, gentlemen, angry words

will get us no place.

Come, we will go inside, out of the heat,

and we will arrive at an amicable solution.

Please, come in, ay?

Please be seated, monsieur.

- No, thank you.

- Now, I am willing to accept any terms

you gentlemen deem fair.

But, one thing must be understood.

Mazepa is to be my present to General Jackson

and mine alone.

- I'm sorry, Captain, I'm afraid you're wrong.

- I like you, Bowie.

I offered to be your friend.

- Any man that gives with his right hand

and then takes back with his left hand,

is no friend of mine.

- Dangerous words, dangerously spoke, Bowie.

Tell me quickly, I have misunderstood.

- Gentlemen!

Gentlemen.

If I may be permitted.

It matters not who gives the President the mare,

the important thing is, that he gets it.

Therefore, settle this dispute among yourselves.

Houston, chooses to take no side.

Farewell gentlemen, I'll remember you both to the President.

[vocalizing]

- Treacherous scoundrel!

He loosened the girth.

- Well, it wouldn't have made any difference, Lafitte.

Don't forget he's on the swiftest horse,

in all of Louisiana.

- Tell me, why did you want the mare?

- Oh, I was told if I gave it to the President,

I'd be made Collector of the Port of New Orleans.

- Consider that 3,000 well spent.

You have learned a lesson,

leave the politics to such as Houston

and larceny to such as me.

- I'll do that, Captain.

[vocalizing]

♪ Jim Bowie, Jim Bowie

♪ He was a fighter, a fearless and mighty adventurin' man ♪