03x28 - Untwist of Fate

[bunniefuu]

[pensive music playing]

Golly, Dinah,
I wish Mom would get off my back.

[mumbles] She says I mumble all the time.

[meows]

I said Mom says I mumble!

Oh, don't you start, Dinah.

Because I know I say every word
loud and clear.

But Mom tells me it sounds like
I'm speaking with marbles in my mouth.

I wonder how she knows
what that sounds like.

Probably, from listening to Brian.
Now, he mumbles.

-Mom tells me she wants me to enunciate.
-[meows]

No, that doesn't mean she wants me
to make goofy faces when I talk.

Enunciate means to speak clearly.

Well, I don't feel much like practicing
my enunciation right now.

So I'll see you later, Dinah

[theme music playing]

♪ Hold on to your seat
Let's go for a ride ♪

♪ Now that we're here
On the other side ♪

♪ Use your imagination
And you'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Every day is something new ♪

♪ With music, rhyme and a dance or two ♪

♪ It's a curious place
With a wonderful crew ♪

♪ And you're never quite sure
What they will do ♪

♪ Use your imagination
You'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

Okay, let's practice the beginning
of the scene one more time.

Places everyone.

Now, remember this is play-acting.

So make me believe it, make me laugh.

Make me cry, make me stand up and do this.

Bravo!

And action.

What light through yonder window breaks?

Hare, I'm sorry but I'm having trouble
saying these lines.

Nobody talks like this anymore.

-[laughs] I know.
-What I mean...

But that's the way they talked

when the play was written
hundreds of years ago.

So that's the way it was written
by that great rabbit playwright,

William Shakespaw.

But the words are a little hard
to understand, Mr. Hare.

The words may be different
but the feelings are the same.

Love, hate, romance, chance,
coincidence, fate.

But still, if I might just change
this one last--

No, nobody changes a word.

Just read the lines
the way they were written.

-Okay.
-Actors.

Let's take it from the top.

And action.

What light through yonder window breaks?

Hare, I'm sorry.

What's my character's motivation here?

You know, why am I doing this?

-You wanna know what your motivation is?
-Yes.

-Okay, I'll tell you.
-Okay.

Our Red Queen loves William Shakespaw,

but for the past three years
the Shakespaw in the Park Festival

has been rained out.

So if you don't do this and do it well,

the Queen is going to be really crabby.

Oh!

-Yes, yes. Thank you, Hare. Thank you.
-Yeah.

Now I understand my character completely.

[laughs] Good, then action.

What light through yonder window breaks?

[gasps] It is Juliet, my lady, my love.

[sighs]

She speaks.

Oh, speak again.

Oh, Bunny, Bunny,
wherefore art thou, Bunny?

Shall I hear more or shall I speak now?

Oh, Bunny, what's in a name?

That which we call a carrot
by any other name would taste as sweet.

Juliet, yoo-hoo!

Oh, Bunny, you shouldn't have come.

Why, if my kinsmen find you here,

it will mean your furry tail.

Cut!

I love it! It moves me, it's real.

-It was good, wasn't it?
-You mean that, Mr. Hare?

Of course, I mean it.
Face it, Alice, you two were born to act.

[rock music playing]

♪ A talent such as yours ♪

♪ Has never graced the stage ♪

♪ You put Garbo to shame ♪

♪ And De Niro in a rage ♪

♪ Oh, you move me, you really move me ♪

♪ You give my heart a little thrill ♪

♪ With your tremendous thespian skills ♪

♪ You really do it for me
And that's a natural fact ♪

♪ You were born
Yes, you were born to act ♪

♪ So come on and take a bow ♪

♪ You're stellar, number one ♪

♪ The audience will scream ♪

♪ They'll be in tears
When this play is done ♪

♪ Oh, you move me, you really move me ♪

♪ You give my heart a little thrill ♪

♪ With your tremendous thespian skills ♪

♪ You really do it for me
And that's a natural fact ♪

♪ You were born
Yes, you were both born to act ♪

-[Hatter scat singing]
-Mmm!

Something sure smells good.

Yeah, that's because I just fired up
my riddle griddle.

-Care for a riddle hot off the griddle?
-I'd love one.

All right, here you go.

"What does a duck do
when it flies upside down?"

That's an easy one.

When a duck flies upside down,
he quacks up.

Right.

-Care for another riddle? All right.
-Oh, yeah, yeah.

That one wasn't filling at all.

-Whoa!
-Whoa!

[Hatter] "What has six legs
and goes, 'Oink, oink, oink'?"

I don't know.

-A pig.
-A pig.

Yeah, I added two more legs
to make it a little harder.

Oh!

-This about to burn.
-Oh!

-[chuckles] Whoops. Whoa!
-Whoa!

"What's gray
and has four legs and a trunk?"

An elephant.

No, a mouse on vacation.

[pop music playing]

Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah.

♪ Just cooking up riddles
Hot off the griddle ♪

♪ Cooking up riddles, whoa-oh, yeah ♪

♪ Cooking up riddles
Hot off the griddle ♪

♪ Cooking up riddles, whoa-oh, yeah ♪

♪ Why do birds fly south? ♪

♪ Because it's too far to walk ♪

♪ Cooking up riddles ♪

♪ When is music like a mountain? ♪

♪ That's easy, when it's rock ♪

♪ Cooking up riddles
Hot off the griddle ♪

♪ Cooking up riddles, whoa-oh, yeah ♪

♪ Hey, here's some food for thought ♪

♪ What dog keeps the best time? ♪

♪ I know, a watch dog ♪

♪ Cooking up riddles ♪

♪ Why does the baby pig eat so much? ♪

♪ To make himself a hog ♪

♪ Cooking up riddles
Hot off the griddle ♪

♪ Cooking up riddles, whoa-oh, yeah ♪

♪ Cooking up riddles
Hot off the griddle ♪

♪ Cooking up riddles, whoa-oh, yeah ♪

[alarm blaring]

[Hatter]
"Warning. Warning. Danger. Danger."

Crystal, what is it?

-"It's a twister!" Oh.
-[wind blowing]

-A twister.
-A twister.

-Board up the window.
-Lock all the doors.

-Batten down the teapot.
-[clamoring]

Have you heard the news?
A twister's on its way.

-We've heard, and it's a big one.
-I just have one question.

You don't even have to ask.

Of course you can stay with us
until it blows past.

Well, actually, Her Majesty and I
are heading for the royal basement.

My question is about the Shakespaw scene
we're rehearsing.

I'm practically invisible in this play.

You see, Hare, I was counting the number
of lines that Alice has

and the number of lines I have.

And I noticed she has more.

So I was wondering,
if I might just change--

No.

Nobody changes a word, just read
the lines the way they were written.

Actors.

Wait a minute,
does anybody know where Alice is?

Wasn't she with you?

She was,
but she went to visit Caterpillar.

Oh, then she'll be okay.

Caterpillar will make sure she's safe
from the twister.

[clamoring]

Oh, Bunny, what's in a name?

That which we call a carrot
by any other name would taste as sweet.

Boy...

The sky is looking pretty nasty.

Maybe I'd better get over
to the Caterpillar's.

Alice, what are you doing out here?

A scene from Rabbit and Juliet.

Was it so terrible you couldn't tell?

I wasn't playing kitty critic.
I meant you shouldn't be out here.

A twister is approaching.

-A twister? You mean like a tornado?
-Tornado, whirlwind, cyclone.

Any way you say it,
it's not a good forecast.

So take it from this cat and scat.

No, I've got to get over
to the Caterpillar's.

-[wind blowing]
-[gasps] Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!

Boy, I've never seen a mess like this
left behind after a storm.

I'll say. Papers, leaves, tin cans,
chattering teeth.

-Chattering teeth?
-Chattering teeth?

I'll take those.

That twister hit so fast

I didn't have time
to bring my chattering teeth indoors.

-Oh!
-[clamoring]

Alice, where have you been?

Well, don't you see? Leaves and twigs,
her clothes, she got caught in a twister.

Is that true, Alice?

-Oh, my gosh. Are you all right?
-Say something, anything.

She sells seashells by the seashore.

What did she say?

Wasn't it obvious? She said,
"She smells seashells by the seashore."

-Whoa, why is she smelling seashells?
-And when was she at the seashore?

No, no, no. She said,
"She spells seashells at the seashore."

There was a spelling bee at the seashore?

[groans] Peter Piper picked a peck
of pickled peppers,

a peck of pickled peppers
Peter Piper picked.

Boy, Alice, I don't mean to get personal

but I don't think you're gonna get invited
to a lot of parties talking like that.

Sheesh! Haven't you figured it out yet

that that was no normal twister
Alice was caught in?

It was a tongue twister.

Wait, so every time she opens her mouth,

she's gonna rattle off
one of those crazy sayings

that ties up the tongue
and is nearly impossible to say?

Looks that way.

Oh, no. If she speaks in tongue twisters,
she's going to ruin the Shakespaw Festival

and the Queen will have a royal fit.

Say it's not so, Alice.

Sarah saw a sash shop,
full of showy shiny sashes.

-Whoa!
-Oh!

That is serious.

♪ La, da, da, da, da, da! ♪

Well, I think it's safe to say
Alice is resting comfortably now.

Oh!

I thought it was safe to say it.

It's not gonna be safe for me
to show my whiskers around the palace

if the Shakespaw Festival is ruined
by Alice's tongue twisters.

Now, now, remember it's always darkest
before you turn on the light.

Gentlemen,
I present my tongue twister trunk.

Full of handy-dandy gadgets

designed to cure
the common tongue twister.

Hatter, Alice, isn't gonna let you
get within six feet of her

with those goofy gadgets.

-Huh?
-I mean, think about it.

You can't expect someone
to just walk up to you and say,

"Hi, please try those things out on me."

Oh, thank you for volunteering!
A demonstration is in order.

-Me?
-Sure, brother, why not?

After all, you do want to see
how Hatter plans to cure Alice, don't you?

Look at it this way,
it's in the interest of science.

[dance music playing]

♪ What on earth has happened
To your pioneering spirit? ♪

♪ You might nearly be a hero
If you merely wouldn't fear it ♪

♪ There's no need for your defiance
Here's a list of happy clients ♪

♪ Really, Dum, you act like
We're trying to feed you to the lions ♪

♪ Like the first man in space
You could help the human race ♪

♪ It's in the interest of science ♪

-♪ What's the catch?
-♪ Like Curie or Pasteur ♪

♪ You can help to find a cure ♪

♪ It's in the interest of science ♪

-♪ Dee? ♪
-♪ Yeah ♪

-♪ I've got a question ♪
-♪ What? ♪

♪ Are you supplying insurance? ♪

♪ For your information
Research and experimentation ♪

♪ Are the basis and foundation
Of scientific explanation ♪

♪ There's no need to cry and moan
The tongue you save might be your own ♪

♪ The Hare is in-charge
So you know nothing can go wrong ♪

♪ Like the first man in space
You could help the human race ♪

♪ It's in the interest of science ♪

♪ If it's so interesting
Why don't you do it? ♪

♪ Like Curie or Pasteur ♪

♪ You can help to find a cure
It's in the interest of science ♪

-♪ Well... ♪
-♪ Science ♪

All right. What do I have to do first?

Stick out your tongue.

Isn't that rude?

It would be usually.

But this is a scientifically
controlled experiment.

So stick out your tongue and say, "Ah!"

"Ah!"

Now, first the tongue twister tissue.

-Tissue.
-Tissue.

[Hatter] All right.

Next, the tongue twister towel.

-Towel.
-Towel.

-Oh! Oh! Mm-hm.
-There it is.

Yes.

[chattering]

Okay.

Then to hold it all in place
the tongue twister twist-ties.

-Twist-ties.
-Twist-ties.

-Ooh!
-Aah!

There we go.

There.

Now, Dum, try saying,

"We surely shall see the sun shine soon."

[muffled]
We surely shall see the sun shine soon.

See, it works.
He can't say a simple tongue twister.

He can't say anything.

How true that is.

But Alice has to be able to speak
to play Juliet in the festival.

[stammers] Well, don't worry, Hare,
I have lots of other ideas

for terminating tiresome tongue twisting.

So you go home and rest.

And I guarantee you that
by this afternoon,

your Juliet will not have
a tongue twister problem.

Oh.

Whether or not Juliet
will be played by Alice, I don't know.

Oh, Bunny, Bunny,
wherefore art thou, Bunny?

Dormouse, I had no idea
you were a fan of William Shakespaw.

Of course, I did all of his plays
in my school drama.

Yeah, great.

Heh. Well, then in the unlikely event
that I can't find a way to stop Alice

from speaking in tongue twisters,
it's good to know I have a backup.

For never was a story of more woe
than that of Juliet and her Bunny-oh.

That's terrific, yeah.

So you see, Caterpillar,
even though the Hatter assured us

that he'd find a quick fix
for Alice's tongue twisters,

we thought we'd see
if you had any suggestions.

Not that we don't have confidence
in the Hatter.

Of course. Far be it from any of us
to doubt the Hatter.

But rest assured you've come
to the right Caterpillar.

You have a way
to get Alice speaking normally again?

No, but I do have a story
about somebody else

who was embarrassed
when she opened her mouth.

Once there was a young hyena name Phyllis,
who was very serious.

Even though your average hyena
will laugh with a drop of a hat...

no one ever saw Phyllis so much as smile.

However, Phyllis had a secret.

Whenever she was alone,
she enjoyed reading elephant jokes.

You see, Phyllis liked to laugh.

But because she thought her laugh
sounded silly,

she was too embarrassed
to let anyone here it.

Then, one day Phyllis was in the mood
for a chuckle.

She opened her joke book,
thinking she was alone.

Unfortunately, she wasn't.

"Go ahead, make fun of my silly snicker
and my goofy giggle!"

Phyllis cried.

"I've laughed for the last time."

But Phyllis' friends
liked how she sounded.

Especially the goofy giggle.

"Can you teach us to laugh like that?"
they asked.

Phyllis realized she had been silly
to be embarrassed.

She agreed to become their laugh teacher.

And even put out a how-to book,
a series of instructional tapes,

and a video.

You see, although Phyllis
didn't have the last laugh...

it turned out that she had the best one.

So speaking in tongue twisters
isn't all bad.

As long as Alice can keep
her sense of humor and laugh at herself.

It's not Alice's sense of humor
we're worried about, it's the Queen's.

Oh!

Hatter, were you able to stop Alice
from speaking in tongue twisters?

Of course, it was easy, piece of cake.

Or should I say a piece of taffy.

-Taffy.
-Taffy.

Yeah, you see I remembered
old Auntie Hatter's recipe

for tongue twister taffy.

Just one piece will stop even the most
tiresome of tongue twisters.

So now she speaks normally?

Mm-hm.

-You're sure?
-Mm, mm. Yeah.

-You've heard her?
-Well, actually, uh... no.

But, see, I gave Alice strict orders

not to say a word for two hours
after putting the taffy in her mouth.

Not that she has a choice.

Old Auntie Hatter's taffy is so tough,

it'll take her two hours
to chew it anyway.

Yes.

Why aren't you in costume?
You're on stage in one minute.

I know. But I just have one question
about the script.

You know, Hare, I feel I know my character
really well now.

Perhaps even better than the writer

and I just don't feel my character
would ever say this line.

-So I was wondering if I might change--
-No!

Nobody changes a word.

Just read the lines
the way they were written.

Actors.

[chuckling] Oh! This is so exciting.

I just love
the Shakespaw in the Park Festival.

It's so classy, the beauty of the stories,
the imagery of the poetry.

The crunchiness of the popcorn.

Oh!

Your Majesty,
is it true that you've read every play

-of William Shakespaw's?
-Oh, many times.

In fact, I know them backward and forward.

Uh, doesn't reading a play backward
kind of spoil the ending?

Oh.

[cheering]

-Oh, Hare.
-Thank you.

I'd like to welcome you all
to the fifth annual

Shakespaw in the Park Festival.

[cheering]

Unfortunately, I can't.

You see, this would have been
the fifth year in a row

if it hadn't been rained out
for the past three years.

Which makes this the second annual--

-Oh! Start the show, you chucklehead!
-[sputters]

These actors on stage,
your humble patience pray.

Gently to hear,

so you may kindly judge our play.

Huh?

Or to quote the Bunny Bard himself,

let's get this show on the road.

[cheering]

[all] Ooh! Ahh!

Oh, the Rabbit!

What light through yonder window breaks?

[gasps] It is Juliet, my lady, my love.

[sighs]

[sighs]

[sighs]

She speaks. Oh, speak again.

A noisy noise annoys an oyster.

Uh... [chuckles nervously]

She speaks.

Oh, speak again.

A skunk jumped over the stump
in a skunk hole.

Hatter, what did she say?

-Something about a skunk.
-A skunk?

There's no skunk in Rabbit and Juliet.

This scene is sure starting to smell.

[Rabbit] Uh...

I say...

she speaks.

Oh, speak again.

Alice, please, I'm dying out here.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck
if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Boo!

Stop the play.

Juliet's not supposed to be blathering
about oysters, skunks and woodchucks.

And I should know,

because I know every word
of Juliet's part by heart.

Alice, there must be some reason
you're goofing up this play, what is it?

Rubber baby buggy bumpers.

Uh, Your Majesty.

That twister that came through Wonderland,

it was a tongue twister
and Alice got caught in it.

[gasping]

Oh, for goodness' sakes.

The same thing happened to me
when I was a little princess,

but I had the good sense
to untwist myself.

Alice, what direction were you twisting in
when you came out of the twister?

Oh, wait, don't answer that.

Somebody else tell me.

Well, when she came spinning past us
she was twisting in this direction.

Oh, yeah.

Fine, then let's get Alice spinning
in the other direction and untwist her.

[dance music playing]

♪ Well, when a whirlwind comes
At the drop of a hat ♪

♪ It can twist a person up ♪

♪ So you don't know where you're at ♪

♪ And you've got to un-twist, yeah ♪

♪ Un-twist like this ♪

♪ Now if you're all balled up
I must insist ♪

♪ Let's do the un-twist ♪

♪ Well, now ♪

♪ Mama, Papa, Hatter, Hare
Listen, all you folks out there ♪

♪ Alice, Rabbit, Dum and Dee
Cyclones never worry me ♪

♪ Now when tornadoes blow through
And turn your world around ♪

♪ You can do a new dance
Get your feet back on the ground ♪

♪ Everybody un-twist, whoa ♪

♪ Un-twist like this ♪

♪ I said if you're all balled up
I must insist ♪

♪ Everybody un-twist ♪

♪ Yeah, if you're all balled up
I must insist ♪

♪ Everybody un-twist ♪

Okay, Alice, say something.

Oh, Bunny, Bunny,
wherefore art thou, Bunny?

-Oh!
-I'm right here.

Oh, uh, I mean--

Shall I hear more or shall I speak now?

Oh, thank goodness,
Alice is back to normal.

-Then let the play begin.
-Oh, right.

Places, places, places! Everyone, places!

Places! Right, right.

Oh, Dinah, Dinah,
wherefore art thou, Dinah?

Oh, don't look at me like that.

I was just play-acting.

But I hope you noticed
how well I enunciated.

-[meows]
-Well, I decided Mom was right.

It is important to speak clearly,
so people will know what you're saying.

Even if they don't know
why you're saying it.

[theme music playing]

♪ That's all for now
But we'll see you again ♪

♪ Come back real soon
Now that we're all friends ♪

♪ Where every day is something new ♪

♪ With music, rhyme and a dance or two ♪

♪ Use your imagination
And you'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventures in Wonderland ♪