["Alfred Hitchcock" theme music]
- Good evening.
are becoming more
and more unreal.
We have robots, monsters,
witches, martians.
In some cases, whole
families are unreal.
In one, for example, the
leading lady is a witch,
and her husband is
an advertising man.
In a series which
we are planning,
we have taken the
next logical step.
We have eliminated the actors
and are using actual
robots for all the parts.
Other workers have been
liberated by the machine age.
Why not the actor?
Let him enjoy the
benefits of automation,
the relief from heavy labor,
the added leisure
time, the unemployment.
Actually, only a few
actors have objected,
and they only on the grounds
that this is typecasting.
There are many advantages.
For one thing, they
never forget their lines,
provided they are
properly programed.
For example, here
are a few lines
from one of Hamlet's
soliloquies.
[robot beeping]
Being method actors, they
are inclined to mumble a bit.
Our play this
evening will be acted
by flesh and blood actors,
and follows in just
one long minute.
[light orchestral music]
- Thank you.
May I have my bags, please?
Thank you, that's mine too.
- [Luke] Ah, I'll get it.
- Mr. Hunter?
- That's right.
- I'm Martha Peters.
- I know.
Ah, can you manage
that all right?
- Sure.
- All right, the truck's
right over there.
- Can I help?
- Nope, all set.
Martha, this is Sam Ogle.
Sam, this is Martha Peters.
- [Sam] Pleased to
meet you, ma'am.
Any friend of Luke's,
is a friend of mine.
- Not a friend.
We're getting married tonight.
[light orchestral music]
- Is anything wrong?
You're very quiet, aren't you?
- [groans] Well,
talking's a habit.
Get out of it when you're alone.
- I know, I've been
alone too, Mr. Hunter.
- Luke.
- I beg your pardon?
- You can call me
Luke if you want to.
That's if you still wanna
go through with this.
- Well, what makes
you think I wouldn't?
- Well, I thought maybe when
ya got a good look at me,
you might wanna back out.
- Well, there's nothing
wrong with the way you look.
- [chuckles] You
must need glasses.
Bring your bankbook?
- Oh, yes.
- Well, there was, but, well,
there was some
things and clothes
that I wanted to buy
for my trousseau.
- Well, sure, yeah.
Here's mine, 7,000 like I wrote.
Of course I got the
house and this truck
and a carpenter shop uptown,
so I guess we come out
pretty even on the deal.
- Oh, I don't think of
marriage as a deal, Mr. Hunter.
- I, I didn't mean it like that.
- I know, getting
married this way
through a correspondence
club isn't easy.
I guess we're both
a little nervous.
- Well, there's nothing
to be nervous about.
Tomorrow we'll go into town
and open up a joint
bank account together.
If that's okay with you.
- Whatever you say, Luke.
You never told me your
house was so impressive.
- I never said it was
my house, minister's.
- Oh, but, oh, I'm a mess.
I thought I'd have a
chance to freshen up first.
- No sense making an extra
trip, just a waste of gas.
You'll have plenty
of chance to clean up
after we're married.
- Oh.
- I now pronounce
you man and wife.
My congratulations to you both.
- Oh, thank you.
- Well, what's the matter?
Aren't you gonna kiss the bride?
[Luke chuckles]
He's shy, don't you worry.
He'll get over that, my dear.
Just give him a little time.
- Ah, it's getting late,
ah, better get going.
- Oh, well, can't you
stay and have some coffee?
I've got some perking.
- Oh, some, some other time.
- Well, that, that,
that's a promise, Luke.
Ah, perhaps you'll be
coming to services now.
- Well, sure will, Reverend,
whenever I get a chance.
- You just hold him to that.
Here we are
practically neighbors,
and the only time
we ever see Luke
is when he comes to
deliver a coffin.
- Coffin?
- County hires me to build
coffins for paupers funerals.
- I'm surprised he
hasn't told about it.
- Well, courtship's
hardly the time
to discuss funerals, my dear.
- Of course, besides,
I keep forgetting
that you come from out of town.
- Saint Petersburg.
- Funny, I never would've
thought you were a Southerner.
- Well, I, I was
born in Michigan,
but for the past 12 years,
I've been the
librarian down there.
- Oh, then you and Luke
can't have known
each other very long.
- Long enough,
ah, bye, Reverend.
- Goodbye.
- Mrs. Gilfoyle.
- Goodbye.
- Goodnight.
- [Martha] Thank you very much.
- [Peggy] Goodnight.
[light orchestral music]
- I'll get this in the bedroom.
Ah, make yourself at home.
[light orchestral music]
- Martha!
You gotta watch it.
You could get burned.
- Oh, I didn't realize I was
standing so close [chuckles].
I just love fireplaces.
- They come in handy.
- Oh, another fireplace.
Ah, isn't there a furnace?
- It cost too much
to put one in.
Wanna see the rest of the house?
Bathroom, I installed
the plumbing myself
same time as I did the kitchen.
- Oh, you built all these?
- Whole shebang, sink and all.
Ah, if you get cold,
you can leave that stove on,
puts out good heat.
- I ah, I don't see
any washing machine.
- Uh, it's in the basement.
Not much to look at.
- Oh, I think it's nice.
Uh, doesn't it get
awfully cold down here?
- Uh, hot water heater
takes the chill off some.
Of course, be winter soon.
You'll have to
bundle up good then.
- Ooh, don't even talk about it.
- [chuckles] Keep forgettin'
you're from the real south.
- Well, it isn't very
warm down here right now.
- There's plenty of good
heat up in the bedroom.
Why don't you run
along up there?
- All right.
Aren't you coming?
- You go ahead.
I'll be right along.
- All right.
[suspenseful music]
Luke?
- I'll be right there.
[suspenseful music]
- [Martha] Luke, is
there anything wrong?
- No, all finished.
[suspenseful music]
[whimsical orchestral music]
Morning.
- Good morning, dear.
- Well, dear, what're
you all dressed up about?
- Church, it's Sunday in
case you've forgotten.
- I didn't forget.
I don't shave on Sundays.
- [chuckles] So I noticed
when I kissed you.
- [Luke] I didn't hear
you get up this morning.
- Oh, I sneaked out.
As long as you
wouldn't come with me,
I didn't see any sense
in disturbing you.
- Uh huh, I noticed
something in the oven.
- Dinner, I put a leg of
lamb on before I left.
You do like lamb,
don't you, dear?
- Sure, yeah, sure, yeah.
- Well, I better
take a look at it.
You don't mind my going
to church, do you, dear?
- No, suit yourself.
- It's really the
only chance I've had
to meet people
since I came here.
- Yep, four weeks ago yesterday.
- [chuckles] You remembered.
Now, why are you keeping
track of the days?
- [Luke] A fella don't
get married everyday.
- Peggy Gilfoyle was
asking about you.
You know, she's
really very nice.
She introduced me to the ladies
of the Missionary Society.
They've asked me to join.
- [Luke] Well, well, well.
- Now, don't you poke fun.
The Missionary Society
does a lot of fine work
among the heathens.
- Plenty of heathens right here
in this town if you ask me.
- Well, nobody is
asking you, Mr. Smarty.
- Eh, you wanna join, go ahead.
- They meet once
a month, you know?
There's going to
be a quilting bee
at the Gilfoyle's
next Wednesday night.
- [Luke] Okay.
- You really don't mind if I go?
- No.
- Oh, what's that?
- Got us a new carving knife.
- Oh, how thoughtful of you.
I didn't know you bought it.
- Life's full of surprises.
[women chattering]
- Oh, yes, now if you
ladies will excuse me,
I'll see about our food.
[women chattering]
- And it was two years ago.
I remember because
Virginia was here.
- Virginia?
- Luke's first wife.
He's told you about
Virginia, hasn't he?
- Well, no, we've never
really talked about her.
What was she like?
- Mm, she was a fine person.
Lived here all her life.
Her father left her
the house, you know?
- House?
- The one you live in.
Virginia certainly
had us fooled.
We all thought she
was a born old maid,
and then Luke showed up
right out of the blue,
and they were married.
- [Helen] Some people said
they'd been corresponding.
One of those lonely
hearts clubs, you know.
- Don't you believe it.
Virginia had too much sense
for a thing like that.
- How long were they married?
- [Helen] About six months.
That's when she bought
Luke the pickup truck.
They went back in it to
visit his hometown in Texas.
- Smallboot now that's
a funny name for you.
Smallboot, Texas.
- Well, not so
funny for Virginia.
Can you imagine?
Food poisoning carrying
her off just like that.
- [Sylvia] You
never know, do you?
Those things happen
just over night.
- No, you never know.
- Luke said he buried her in
the family plot down there,
but he decided to come
back here and stay one.
I mean, after all, he inherited
the house and everything.
- Yes, of course.
- [Helen] That's odd.
- [Sylvia] What?
- I just remembered something.
The last time I saw Virginia
alive was here in this house.
- That's right, it was
a sewing circle meeting,
just like this one.
- She was sitting there,
right where you are.
- [Sylvia] Isn't it strange?
- Yes, very strange.
[suspenseful music]
Luke?
Luke?
Luke?
[object thudding]
[suspenseful music]
[Martha gasps]
- Hey, what's the idea?
You scared me.
- You scared me.
What're you doing down
there at this hour?
- I was just checking.
You're right, it
is cold down there.
- Well, I'll, I'll
heat you some coffee.
- Thanks.
- It's getting
chillier everyday.
I hate to think of what it's
going to be like down there
next month in that basement
when the ground starts freezing.
- It'll cost a fortune
to heat it up proper.
You're only down there a couple
of hours on Monday anyways.
Do what I do, wear sweaters.
- Did Virginia
wear sweaters too?
- Huh, Virginia?
So that's it.
Mangy bunch of anteaters.
- Anteaters?
- They're the critters with
the long noses, ain't they.
Like your friends at
that sewing society.
- Why didn't you tell
me about her yourself?
- There's nothing to tell.
You must've heard it all.
Got married, she took sick.
That was the end of it.
- Was it?
- Will you stop dibbling me?
What do you wanna know?
- The truth.
- All right, all right.
We never did get along together.
Seen it was a mistake
right from the beginning,
then she died.
- Yes?
- Nothing, I'm just
glad it's all over.
- Then why did you marry me?
- Well, that's different.
- Is it?
- Why sure, we get on
fine together, just fine.
- Well, I always thought
so, up until tonight, oh.
- You forget about that.
Those old biddies are just
trying to make trouble.
Come on now!
Nevermind what happened.
All that counts is
just you and me.
[light orchestral music]
You asleep yet?
- No.
- I was just thinking.
- What about?
- Christmas holidays
coming up about a month.
We ought to take a vacation.
Maybe we could take a
little trip together.
- Where would you want to go?
- Well, you say
you like it warmer.
Maybe I'll drive you
down to my hometown
to a place called
Smallboot, Texas.
[suspenseful music]
- The second half of our story
will be visible in a moment.
I don't like the way
they're looking at me.
Fortunately, some actors
are indispensable.
Who else could say now a
word from your local station?
[suspenseful music]
[truck engine humming]
[suspenseful music]
- Hi.
- You're home late.
- Yeah, I had a hard day.
- What was in the big box?
- What box?
- The big box that was
in the back of the truck
when you came in.
- You seeing things, gal?
There wasn't nothing
in that truck.
Dinner about ready?
- Soon.
- Good, I'll go wash up.
[suspenseful music]
Make up your mind yet?
- Hmm, what about?
- The trip, you remember.
We talked about it.
- Well, you haven't
said anything since.
- Well, I am now.
What do you think?
- I really hadn't planned on it.
- Well, I have.
- Be such a long trip.
- Oh, nothing to it.
Be over before you know it.
- [Martha] Couldn't
we just stay here?
- I thought you were the one
that wanted to get
out of the cold?
Well, this is your chance, gal.
- Do we have to decide now?
- Well, Christmas
is just a week away.
I'll have to write my friends
and make arrangements.
- It seems like such
a lot of trouble.
- Well, you leave
everything to me.
I got it all worked out.
- It's really what you want?
- Sure, well, don't
look so sad about it.
The change will do you good.
- Oh, Luke.
- Huh?
- Nothing.
- Well, it's all settled then.
Well, I better get busy.
Time is getting short.
- I know.
[suspenseful music]
- What do you
think you're doing?
- Well, the garage is locked.
- I know, what do
you want in there?
- Well, I um, I was going to
measure the kitchen windows
for some new curtains.
I need a yardstick.
- Here, next time you want
something, ask for it.
Now, come on, let's
get in the house.
- Aren't you going to put
the truck in the garage?
- No, you'll be needing
it tonight anyway.
Didn't you say you
were going to meetin'?
- Oh, yes, the Missionary
Society, I'd forgotten.
- Well, I haven't.
Give you a chance to say
goodbye to those old hens.
- Goodbye?
- That's right, the
trip, it's all set.
- So soon, well, you couldn't
have written your
friends until today.
- Well, I decided to
telephone instead.
Everything's arranged.
Now, come on, let's get
in and get supper fixed.
It's getting late.
- Luke, maybe I
shouldn't go out tonight.
- You might as well go
while you got the chance.
Don't worry about me.
I got work to do.
You coming?
[suspenseful music]
- Whew, goodnight,
good to see you.
Goodnight, see you next time.
See you next month, goodnight.
- [Woman] Bye, darling.
- [Sylvia] Goodbye.
- Aw, thanks again.
- Goodbye, Helen,
good to see you.
Oh, will you excuse me?
There's the telephone.
- Sure, goodbye.
- Before Christmas, yes.
- Ooh, it's too bad
you're not gonna
be here at Christmastime.
- Yes.
- You know, in a way, I
really hate to see you go.
- Well, it can't be helped.
You heard her.
Luke made up his mind.
- Better run along.
Take care of yourself
now, you hear?
- Bye.
- [Helen] Bye.
- I'll try.
- This is none of my business,
but it's too bad Luke
doesn't buy you a car.
- Well, we never
even talked about it.
- Well, I hate to see you
riding around in that truck.
Looks like a hearse.
Is something the matter?
- No.
- But you were so
quiet all evening.
Suppose you had your
mind on your trip.
You know when you'll be leaving?
- Luke said the day after
tomorrow after work.
- Hmm, well then I guess I
won't be seeing you again,
before you leave that is.
- Oh, no, I guess not.
- Have a nice trip.
- Ah, Sylvia.
- [Sylvia] Mm hmm?
- I was just thinking.
Tomorrow I'll be packing,
but the next day,
why don't you come by for
lunch just to keep me company.
You know, until Luke
comes home and we leave.
Just for a visit.
I, I get so nervous waiting.
- You sure you haven't got
something on your mind, dear?
- Ah, maybe we could
talk about it then.
- Of course, I'll
see you about 12:30,
day after tomorrow, bye.
[suspenseful music]
[door creaking]
[suspenseful music]
[truck engine humming]
- See a ghost?
- What're you doing
home so early?
It's just past noon.
- Well, I know, I
thought I'd surprise you.
What're you wearing
your coat for?
- I was so cold.
- Are you packed yet?
- [Martha] No.
- That's why I
knocked off early.
I figured I better get started.
- Luke.
- [Luke] Yeah?
- You locked the basement door.
- Uh huh.
- Well, I, I've got
some washing to do.
- Well, it'll have to
go till after the trip.
- I can't let the
wash go that long.
- Well, you said yourself
it's too cold down there.
- Yes, but I, I have--
- Well, forget it.
Maybe you better
run into town now.
Didn't you say you wanted
to pick up some last minute
Christmas present for
those hen friends of yours?
- It doesn't matter.
Yes, yes, there is
something I need in town.
- Here, take the
key to the pickup.
Well, I may need these others.
- Of course.
- Take your time, don't hurry.
Just so you're back before dark.
Have fun.
[suspenseful music]
- Afternoon, something
I can do for you?
- Yes, I want to buy a g*n.
[suspenseful music]
- [Pawnbroker] How
about this one?
[suspenseful music]
- Luke?
Luke?
[suspenseful music]
Um, why are there
bags in the parlor?
We're not leaving until
tomorrow afternoon.
- [Luke] Changed my mind.
We're going tonight.
- Tonight?
- Well, might as well have
an extra day of freedom.
I got to thinking about it.
No sense waiting.
- Couldn't we stay
until the morning?
- I always travel night.
There's less traffic.
Besides, I'm all dressed now.
I wouldn't wanna go to
all that trouble again.
- Then that means
I can't see Sylvia.
- [Luke] Sylvia.
- Yes, I asked her to come
over tomorrow around noon.
I'll have to phone her.
- Isn't no sense wasting time.
You can call her
when we stop for gas.
What do you wanna see her for?
- Nothing, just a visit.
- Well, she can wait
till you get back.
Right now I want to be alone
with you, just the two of us.
You don't know how much I've
been looking forward to this.
- I, I better pack my things.
- I'll take my bags out then.
Say, didn't you get
any Christmas presents?
- I couldn't find
anything I wanted.
- Well, just as well.
No use wasting your money.
Save it for your old age.
[suspenseful music]
- Martha.
[Martha gasps]
- I, I was just going to
put my bag in the truck.
- Later.
You forgot something.
- What?
- Ah, the lights are all on.
- Oh, I'll put them off.
- We'll do it together.
[suspenseful music]
- The basement.
- I've got something to
show you before we leave.
- What?
- You'll see.
[suspenseful music]
Come on.
Martha, Martha!
[g*n firing]
[suspenseful music]
[melancholy music]
- Merry Christmas
to my dear wife.
[melancholy music]
[Martha crying]
- [Luke] Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas, Merry
Christmas, Merry Christmas,
Merry Christmas,
Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas,
Merry Christmas.
[robot beeping]
["Funeral March
of a Marionette"]
[dramatic orchestral music]
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