02x08 - Nick Takes Over Transportation

[bunniefuu]

Yo, what's up, everybody?

Nick cannon here, just chillin'.

You know, having a good time, doing a little baby-sitting,

Because, you know, my friends was out of town.

They wanted me to watch the kids,

Because I'm great with kids.

They love me, right?

They're kind of busy right--

[Cell phone rings]

Cell phone ringing.

Hello?

Man, on phone: what's up, man?

Hey! Carson daly!

What's going on, player?

How you doing?

Oh, host trl?

Yeah! Come on, you know. I got you.

Peace.

Um...you know what? I got to go.

Y'all just watch each other. I got to get out of here.

[Kids whining]

We're not supposed to stay here by ourselves.

Oh, please!

Come on.

That would be irresponsible for--yeah.

Please!

All right, come on. Y'all come with me.

[Cheering]

Nick: screaming children. Come on.

[Cheering]

All right, everybody buckled up?

Yeah! Nick! I got to go pee!

Man, you gonna have to pee later.

We got to get to new york!

Trl is waitin'!

Yeah! Let's go!

Boy: whoa!

Awwww, man!

What happened?

It's broke!

What do we do now?

Got to get to new york.

Guess I'm takin' over transportation, baby.

♪ We're takin' over ♪

♪ Come on ♪

♪ Ain't no party like a nick cannon party ♪

♪ 'Cause a nick cannon party don't stop ♪

♪ Ain't no party like a nick cannon party ♪

♪ 'Cause a nick cannon party don't stop ♪

Yo, what's up, baby?

Nick cannon here.

Hey, and I'm taking over transportation.

I'm getting to the nyc by any means necessary.

Planes, trains, automobiles,

Even motor scooters.

We gonna get there, baby. Yeah!

Meet the crew.

We got camille, evan,

Ashley, shawn,

Tessa, and josh.

Trl! Here we come! New york city, baby!

All right, guys! Follow me!

Kids: not that way, nick!

It's a--

[Crash] dead end!

Boy: that's going to hurt.

Nick: come on, guys! Everybody here?

Yeah.

Train station.

Great place to be.

Get some tickets, get to new york city!

Adult, kids,

--Whoa!

I did not know it was that expensive.

Um...all right.

[Ding] I got a plan.

Come on, guys. Follow me.

[Train whistle]

Ok, shawn, jump on josh's shoulders,

Ashley, you jump on tessa's shoulders,

And throw on the coats.

Hurry up. Here comes the train.

Man: all aboard!

Second man: you guys have tickets, I hope?

Nick: yeah.

Hey, it always worked in the movies!

Boy: yo, nick, are we going to get to meet carson daly?

I'm pretty sure. [Cheering]

Man: hey! What do you kids think you're doing?

[Train whistle]

[Laughter]

All right! That's it!

Out! Out! Get out!

Nick: aah! Take your coats with you!

Man! These conductors have no sense of humor.

[Train whistle]

Man!

It didn't work.

[Sighs]

Got to get to new york!

There has to be some other means of transportation.

Takin' over transportation.

What else is there?

Hey...yeah!

[Ding] I got an idea.

Whoo! Look what I built!

Kids: whoa!

How do you like it, kids?

[All talk at once]

Let's roll!

[Kids cheering]

Nick: yeah! Come on, children!

Y'all like what I prepared for you, huh?

Ha! That's right! I'm the man!

Created this whole hot air balloon

With my bare hands, baby,

Weaved it all by myself.

Yeah! That's what I'm talking about.

Kids: uh, nick?

Takin' over transportation in a real way, baby!

Hey!

Hold on, all right?

Like I was saying, I'm a hot air balloonatic.

Yeah! sh**t, I'm takin' over transportation--

Aah!

Aah!

[Laughter]

Kids: oh!

[Laughter and shouting]

Aah! Help!

[Shouting]

Here I come!

[Shouting]

Here I come.

Man, this is a lot easier in gym class.

Let him up! Let him up!

Let him up! Let him up!

Yeah, nick!

By using my map and my compass,

I know exactly where we are.

Oh. Cool! Wait.

Let me see this thing here.

Uh...

Nick! Well, maybe we could just...

Follow the sun.

Boy: nick, how long is it going to take

To get to new york? Girl: yeah?

Uh...about days.

Kids: days?!

Boy: I got to go pee!

♪ Go, guys! ♪

♪ Spunkle ♪

♪ Go, go, guys ♪

I'm francis spunkle here.

I'm trying to help my man nick get to new york

While he takin' over transportation,

But I have no license,

So--i do have a car,

And I'm pushing it--

Oh!--

To take my driving test,

So I can get my license and help nick out, see?

Oh, my goodness!

[Moaning]

[Mumbles]

Yo! What's up?

Ok. Yeah. How you doing?

I'm here for my driving test.

Ok, great. Ok. Ok.

All right, mr. Spunkle.

Yeah. Francis totis spunkle.

Ok. If you don't know, ask your uncle.

F-r-a--

Ok. I've got it. C--

What's your name?

I'm ms. Ramsey.

Nice to meet you, ms. Ramsey.

Hold it down.

I like your pretty red hair. That's lovely.

Why don't we get in the car, ok?

[Mumbling]

Spunkle: opening the door.

Oh! Get in! Wonderful!

Watch your head. It's all right.

I've got it. Thank you.

You ok? Yes, yes, yes.

You ready? Yes!

You all in? I am.

Ok. Stay right there.

Ooh! You got to do that,

'Cause otherwise it won't shut.

Why don't you walk around the car?

I got to do like starsky and hutch.

This door don't open no more,

So I got to climb in.

Oh! Oh, my--! Sorry!

Get your foot off of me!

Sorry!

What I need you to do first is

Please to buckle your seat belt.

Oh, I got to put this on before we can roll out.

That's right. You know what?

I'm going to need you to put this on.

Wh-why would you want me to put this on?

It's a safety precaution,

Because if we roll through the wrong part of the hood,

And you ain't got on no gold,

They gonna know you not from around there.

We're going to just stay in this little area right here,

So we're not going to be going to a hood.

[Car starting]

So what we're going to do is follow the cones, ok?

Follow the cones!

Ms. Ramsey: in and out.

I need your whole body back in the car.

I got the cones!

Don't hit the cone!

Oh.

[Shouting]

I'm rolling! Rolling!

Stop! You're going to stop!

Oh, s-sorry.

Ms. Ramsey: that's all right. Ok.

What we're going to do is the figure .

We do the figure .

You're going to go through this--that's it.

To the right! No! You're going to be going this way.

You've got to go this way.

, , , --

No, you need to t--

I'm going the right way!

What are you--don't touch my wheel!

, , !

Let's just go up to the stop sign here.

Ok. And this is where you stop.

Stop before the sign!

Yes, but with gentle and ease.

Ok, now, before you continue--

Before I continue, I need something to eat.

This is not the time to eat.

No. Oh...ok.

Now--oh, no! Really! No, thank you.

When you thirsty, you need a little gold drink.

Oh, my gosh.

All right, at the stop sign,

Spunk, what do we do?

At the stop sign, we...chill and parley

And look at the ladies. No, we don't.

Ladies, ladies.

Ladies, ladies.

Nice and easy, you're going to go

Up to the pedestrian walk here--

The crosswalk.

You will stop, because there are people crossing.

You will stop! Hey!

[Spunkle shouting]

They not moving!

Get out of the way!

They're just stuck like this.

It's just--no.

Well, yes, because they're not real!

It's just a cardboard copy!

Why you yellin'?

[Crying] I need to get out of the car.

Did I pass the test?

No!

Help me!

Ms. Ramsey!

Do you drive? No.

Who drives in your family?

Her.

Who's the better driver, your mom or your dad?

My dad. Oh!

You don't have a license, do you?

No. I can give you a license.

Can you cross your eyes? Try it.

Here's a license to drive your parents crazy.

Thank you.

[Burps] here you go.

You get a license.

Can you touch your nose with your tongue?

Oh, I know how to do this.

Hold on.

Drive your parents crazy with that one!

♪ Ain't no party like a nick... ♪

Come on in, children!

Nick: don't go nowhere. There's a lot more fun.

New york city, here we come!

Whoa! Look at that!

Josh: guys, I got to go pee.

Oh, you always have to go pee!

All right, guys, not to worry.

I take over things every episode.

Transportation's not that hard.

We're gonna get a ride, I promise, all right?

Just chill out, be easy.

Just chill-- chill--chill.

See? That looks like my friend's bus

Coming down the street right now.

He's on tour. I'm t--

Hey, now, he's a little old school,

So you guys got to chill out.

Matter of fact, this is what I want you guys to do.

I want you guys to sneak on the back of the bus

While I distract him, all right?

Yeah!

[Harp]

♪ Oswald ♪ ♪ oswald ♪

♪ Oswald ♪ ♪ oswald ♪

Isyss! Whoo!

Isyss: ♪ oswald ♪

Oswald watkins, the original soul brother!

Oh, youngblood!

What's going on with ya?

How you doing, man?

I got a little dilemma, man.

I'm trying to get to new york city,

And...i don't have no ride.

Man, I got to get to trl!

Carson called me, want me to host,

And I just got to get there.

Now, you know I'm always willing

To help a young brother in need,

Especially a soulful, young brother like yourself.

This is my tour bus, and...

You know, if you would like,

I get you a little tour play,

You know, me and you. Cool!

You ain't got nobody else with you now,

Because, you know, I got the boomchuck

Just in case.

I don't play that. Look out!

But you my man, so...come on with me.

Come on with me.

You da man!

All right, come on through young brother.

Sit on down. Go ahead now.

Have a seat, b--

Quit looking at my woman and sit down, boy!

I wasn't looking at your lady.

I wasn't looking at your lady.

So, all right, young man, tell me what your status--

Man, I'm telling you, I've been trying to get to new york.

I been--you don't want to know all that's happened to me.

Aww!

[Door squeaks]

[Laughter] I love it!

[Door squeaks]

I respect you, young man.

I wouldn't just let anybody on my bus,

You know what I'm saying?

Because you are an inspiration to me

As a young man doing your thing in television.

Oh! I'm hearing stuff back there.

You ain't hearing nothin'?

No, soul mama.

[Mumbles]

I ain't hear nothing either.

Y'all heard something?

Soul mama number , soul mama? Mm-hmm?

Could you go ahead up there and do what you do?

Drive this bus. You got it, baby. You got it.

Right on. Keep it loose.

[Chatter]

Soul mama, could you pull this bus on over?

[Tires screeching]

It's been real, and it's been lovely,

But, uh, this is as far as I can take you,

Player, you know, 'cause I got to get down

To the chitlin circuit, and it kind of split ways,

So, uh, I'm sorry, baby.

Aw, you're leaving us?

Yeah, I really enjoyed hanging

With isyss and soul mama number .

Y'all take care.

Oh, uh...you don't need to open that.

[Screaming]

♪ You in trouble! ♪

Yeah. Oswald, player, I'm sorry.

Get off.

My bad, mr. Watkins.

Kids! Where'd y'all go?

[Sighs]

Let it dangle.

Girl: I can't walk anymore.

Nick: I know, I know, I know.

Come on. We can just keep walking.

It's going to be all right.

When is this ever going to stop?

Maybe not.

Now what are we going to do?

[All talking at once]

Nick: let me think. Let me think.

All right.

Think harder, nick!

Nobody out here.

What about that guy right there?

Man: hello!

Let's go talk to him!

Hey! How you doing, sir?

My name's nick cannon.

I actually have a television show on nickelodeon

Where I take over things,

And in this episode,

I was taking over transportation

So I could get to new york and do my thing

And host trl, but...

We've come to a dead end at this lake.

You know how I could get across?

There's no way to get across the lake.

Really?

Like... You wouldn't...

Happen to have a boat or anything--

A boat. I've got a boat.

All: heave! h*!

Heave! h*!

Nick: come on, guys!

I want to see some force!

Josh: man, I got to go pee!

We're running out of time!

Boy: you're the baby-sitter.

You should be rowing.

[Grunting]

Land!

[Kiss smack]

Oh, the land! Yes!

We made it to the land, guys!

[Spits]

[Moans and groans]

Girl: I can't believe you!

Sheesh!

I'll get across this lake!

Watch!

Hello!

My name is dirty lar--

[Belching]

And I'm finishing my lunch.

[Bodily noises] I'm just doing my thing.

Excuse me. Ehh.

[Passing gas] yeah.

Girl: where are we?

Josh: I got to go pee!

Hold on, pee boy!

We gonna get you there.

I have no clue where we are.

I know everybody's tired, thirsty,

Pee boy got to pee.

We just got to find a ride.

Hey! There's dirty larry!

Hey, dirty!

Hey, boy!

He stink. Hold your nose.

What you doing with all them children?

Well, dirty, these are my friends here,

And we're going, you know, to trl.

I'm takin' over transportation.

But we kind of need a ride.

Do y'all want to ride in this?

Definitely not.

Ain't nothin' wrong with it.

[Groaning]

[Passes gas]

Comfortable.

No! Nick.

You got snacks-- ugh!

Who want to read the sports?

[Groans]

Come on in, children!

Aw, no! No!

Well, hey, suit yourself.

Y'all missin' out on some fun.

[Passes gas]

[Sighing] excuse me.

Hey, you guys, this is the only way

We're going to get to new york.

All right, we'll go.

Come on, y'all.

[Groans]

Nick, this stinks!

[All talking]

I'm enjoying this.

[Screams]

[Groans]

Oh!

You wanna be funny, huh?

Now that's what I like to see!

Let her rip!

[Passes gas and sighs]

Josh: come on, nick! I got to go pee!

Nick: I know!

♪ N-n-n-nick, n-nick cannon ♪

♪ Nick cannon ♪

Man! Goodness! I'm sick of walking!

I know! I'm tired.

Nick, I really got to go pee.

Ok. Ok, guys.

Look, I know we've been talking and walking forever.

I got an idea.

[Dialing]

[Phone ringing] this traffic don't make no sense.

I'm te-- h-hello?

[Shouting] hello. Aunt pearl?

[Pearl shouting]

Oh! Oh, nicholas!

Announcer: ladies and gentlemen!

Give it up for aunt pearl's monster masher!

[Announcer talking indistinctly]

Whoo-hoo!

Oh! Oh!

Monster truck rally?

Pearl: whoo-hoo! Oh!

Hey, baby! Ni-ni-ni-ni-nicholas.

Nick: aunt pearl?

Yeah. I'm just--oh!

I'm just so proud of you.

I haven't seen your show yet.

Thank you.

I'm so proud to be your aunt, baby.

Oh! Oh!

So you probably couldn't drive

One of them big ol' trucks over here.

Oh! Oh!

'Cause you are just so wonderful special.

You're so special to me, I tell you.

Aunt pearl, well, thank you.

[Beep]

Could you hold on one second?

Hello? Daly: what's up, man?

Carson!

Man, I'm in the middle...

Of...i don't know.

Sit back, relax, and stay cool.

So you want us just to stand right here?

Hey, that sounds good to me, man,

Because it's hot, I'm tired,

The kids are tired--

We're all tired. Yeah.

Hey! How'd you do that?

[Horn honks] that's a limo!

Carson, you da man!

Hey!

[Cheering]

Oh, yeah!

[All talking at once]

[Pearl talking indistinctly]

I got things to do, baby.

I'm tied up in something right now.

I got to go.

Kids: oh, yeah!

Carson daly's so awesome!

Nick: I know. Now where's carson taking us?

[Whistle]

Hey, who's that guy?

You talking to us?

Oh, yeah!

Carson sent us a helicopter!

Yeah! Cool! Yes!

All right. Everybody buckled up?

Oh, yeah! Let's do this, baby!

This is fun!

Nyc here we come!

Whoo!

I want to see!

Y'all chill back there. Y'all having a good time?

Kids: yeah! Girl: no!

I'm scared!

Boy: man, this is fun!

Josh: I got to go to the bathroom!

Nick: don't worry, you guys.

We're almost there.

[Cheering]

Nick: new york city!

Whoo-hoo!

Boy: you can see the statue of liberty!

Girl: mtv, here we come!

Yeah! Trl!

Josh: I got to go to the bathroom!

Nick: you go to the bathroom while I change.

I got a show to host!

Whoo.

Hey, yo! What's going on, man?

Nick cannon here, man. Nick. Nick, nick, nick.

Yeah, I'm supposed to be guest hosting trl today.

♪ N-n-n-nick, nick cannon ♪

♪ Nick cannon ♪

Hey, what's happening, y'all?

Oh, yeah. Told you we were going to do it.

All the way from l.a., Baby.

Look alive, new york city,

Because nick cannon's takin' over trl!

[Cheering and applause]

I'm like the black, skinny version of carson daly.

I'd like to thank everyone for helping me

Take over this episode of transportation:

My girls isyss,

My man carson daly for hooking me up,

And especially to my traveling crew,

And all y'all at home.

♪ Don't stop ♪

♪ Ain't no party like a nick cannon... ♪

Nick cannon saying, "holler!"

Peace out.

♪ ...nick cannon party don't stop ♪

♪ Ain't no party like a nick cannon party ♪

♪ 'Cause a nick cannon party don't stop ♪

♪ Do my ladies take this party over? ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ Or do my dogs take this party over? ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ Ain't no party like a nick cannon party ♪

Yeah!

Aah! Oh, my goodness!

Aah! [Cheers]

[Crash]

Kids: oh!

Whoo!

Who said I don't do my own stunts, baby?

Jackie chan ain't got nothing on this!

We takin' over.