(no audio)
(upbeat ensemble music)
(upbeat ensemble
music continues)
(upbeat ensemble
music continues)
(mechanical birds whistling "We
Wish You a Merry Christmas")
(soft chiming music)
(relaxed chiming music)
(relaxed chiming
music continues)
(children shouting)
(relaxed chiming music)
(soft piano music)
- Mr. Stevens, why
are you wearing those?
You don't wear glasses.
- I don't know why
I'm wearing these.
Look, I'm just trying to
lighten the mood, okay?
It breaks my heart that you two
weren't chosen for
the holidays again.
- You don't have to
feel sorry for us.
We're used to being let down.
- Why a family wouldn't want
you two girls blows my mind.
I'm sorry.
- We're stuck here
until we age out.
- No one wants the big kids.
- Look, just don't give up hope.
The New Year's coming, families
are gonna want to adopt.
The perfect family could still
be out there for you two.
And you can't forget Fat Daddy.
He'd be here all alone if
it wasn't for you two girls.
- Thank goodness we
didn't get adopted.
Fat Daddy's always
been there for us.
We need to be there for him.
- And you can't
forget the snowman.
The snowman needs
you and you can't,
oh, that's not the snowman.
The snowman and you
can't forget Santa.
We all need you this Christmas.
(footsteps stomping)
Wait.
He's coming.
(door creaks)
Fat Daddy.
(cat purrs)
There he is.
He came to see you two girls.
Up here, Fat Daddy.
We're gonna be here with you
for Christmas, aren't we girls?
- [Emma] Hey, Fat Daddy.
I love you.
You're so sweet.
(relaxed ensemble music)
- Hey buddy.
Maybe we can go down to the
children's home this year.
Would you like to
meet the kiddos?
- A new child for the holidays?
What kind of foster
parent turns a child in
for the holidays,
right before Christmas?
Okay, yeah, I do have the room.
Most of the kids were adopted.
Yeah, I have two remaining.
Trouble?
Hmm.
What kind of trouble are
we talking about here?
Oh, (laughs) oh wow.
Well I have security, I
think we can handle her.
Okay, I'll be here
in the morning.
9:00 a.m.
That'll be fine.
- I have something
I need to tell you.
The Johnsons were
going to adopt me
but I told them that I
wouldn't leave without you,
that they would've had
to adopt both of us.
So that's why I'm still here.
- What?
Why would you do that?
You had a chance
to have a family,
to have a home,
a real Christmas.
You should have went with them.
- You are my family.
I couldn't leave without
you and I never will.
- We're gonna be okay.
We have our own little
family with Fat Daddy.
(soft piano music)
- This might, oh.
(costume rips)
I didn't mean to rip that.
I wonder if this is gonna work?
Yeah.
Okay.
Maybe this, this
will cheer 'em up.
Ah man.
(upbeat whistling)
(upbeat music)
Hmm.
No, maybe not.
(upbeat whistling)
(upbeat music)
- [Longbutt] Nah.
- It was a long day, Fat Daddy
and it's gonna be a
longer day tomorrow.
How's your dinner, boy, hmm?
It's about time for me
to go get my dinner.
(radio crackles)
Officer Longbutt.
(radio beeps)
- [Longbutt] Go ahead, Patrick.
- I'm calling it a night.
So you're on.
- [Longbutt] Sleep tight,
don't let the bed bugs bite.
- Let's go.
(soft guitar music)
(upbeat piano music)
- How long is this gonna take?
- I want to tell you that
your outfit is amazing.
Where did you get that?
- I stole it.
- Okay, well I wore this
shirt because of your name.
Cactuses, Arizona.
- Just for the record,
I despise the heat
and I don't even like that name.
- Tell me about yourself.
- Don't you have all the
information in your case file?
- I do have your
information in the case file
but figured if I was less
formal, you'd be less nervous.
- I'm not the one who's
nervous here, you are.
(Arizona farts)
- Are you okay?
- What do you mean?
You think I'm sick, don't you?
- I'm not saying you're sick.
I just wanted to know
if you were okay.
(Arizona farts)
What have you been eating?
- Beans, morning,
noon and night.
- Don't worry, your issues
are gonna be gone soon.
- What issues?
- I'm not saying
you have issues.
I'm just talking
about, you know.
- No, I don't know.
- That thing.
(Arizona farts)
Well, you don't have
to eat beans here.
We don't eat beans here.
We have great meal options,
you're gonna love them.
Hold on a second.
(Arizona farts)
(Patrick coughs)
Sorry, my allergies
are bothering me.
Okay, so let's get
back focus here.
Now you're in a
good place, okay?
We're all family here.
I actually have two
girls that are still here
and I think you all will
be wonderful friends.
- I don't have friends
and I sure as heck
don't want 'em neither.
- I know you've had a hard
life but there's still a chance
after the Christmas break
you could be adopted.
- I'm 16.
It's over for me, pal.
- On a serious note, I
don't want you running away.
I don't want you sneaking out.
Just give it a chance, I
think you can be happy here
and that's gonna be
difficult anyway.
We have security
patrolling the campus.
Officer Longbutt's
one of the best
security guards we've
ever had and to be honest,
I don't think you could
slip one by him anyway.
- I like having a
bed and food to eat
but don't expect to see me
skipping around singing.
(Arizona farts)
- I'm going to introduce
you to the girls
and have them show
you around, okay?
- Whatever, you're the boss.
- I can't believe it's
four days 'til Christmas.
I'm so tired of being depressed.
- All I can think about is
families having meals together,
exchanging gifts,
decorating the tree.
I mean, we have a tree here
but it's just for show.
There's no ornaments on
it, no gifts underneath it.
- How are we ever gonna
have a real Christmas?
- I guess when we
age out of here
and get a family
of our own one day.
- We have each other
and we have Fat Daddy.
- You know what?
Let's make a pact, that
we'll be sisters forever
even when we leave this place.
We'll always stick together.
- Yeah, sisters forever.
- Sisters forever.
- Hey girls, I have someone
I want you to meet, come on.
Arizona, meet Emma and Bailey.
- Ew.
- I want you three to get along
and I want you two to show
her around the orphanage.
- All right.
(Arizona sighs)
Come on.
(Arizona sighs)
Okay, here's your room.
This is where you're
gonna be staying.
- Ugh, this place is horrible.
- What do you expect?
This is an orphanage,
nothing here is new.
It's not a mansion.
- So you two are my
maids then, right?
My room service?
(record scratches)
- No, we're just-
- Wait, the first
thing I need you to do
is wash my stolen clothes.
- You stole those?
- Mm hmm, and then we need
to get these covers washed
'cause who knows how
many snotty-nosed kids
such as yourself
have slept here.
- We're not your maids and
we're not room service either.
This is your room, the
bathroom's down the hall.
Meals get fed three times
a day in the cafeteria.
- I like beans.
But you can just
call me Arizona.
But don't because
I hate that name.
- Then what are we
supposed to call you?
- The Bean Queen?
Whatever you want.
(Longbutt groans)
- It's getting harder.
- I've never seen that
type of workout before.
- Mr. Stevens, why are you
interrupting my workout?
- Sorry to interrupt
your workout
but I have something I need
to speak with you about.
We have a new girl.
Her name is Arizona and
she might be trouble.
- A new girl, huh?
She's named after a country.
What kind of name is that?
- In her case file,
it says she has
snuck out 1000 times.
- Trouble is my mother's name.
I'm familiar with it.
- I don't want her sneaking out.
- Well you don't
worry, Mr. Stevens.
- I really need you on this one.
- Look at this bod.
You see it?
- Yeah, yeah, I see it.
- I've been working
out for 57 years
and that's what this bod shows.
- I know, okay, please stop.
- Don't worry about
her sneaking out.
- I'm really gonna need
you to step up your game.
- I'm on my top game.
No worries, Mr. Stevens.
Remember,
57 years.
57 years, no one's
ever gotten past me.
Look at this bod, I'm ready.
- Yeah, I can see it.
- Let me get back to my
workout working this bod.
I'm gonna go another 57 years.
(Longbutt groans)
- Have a good day,
Officer Longbutt.
- The bar's supposed to be here.
Have you a good
one, Mr. Stevens.
(Longbutt groans)
- So how long have
you two been here?
- We've been here three years
and we'll probably be
here until we age out.
- Well, that makes three of us.
I've been in and out
of homes my whole life.
You've only been
here for three years.
Sit.
Tell me about the
people who work here.
- Well, there's
Harriet, the chef.
But I'll warn you,
she's beyond weird.
Terrifying, actually.
I'm surprised she
hasn't poisoned us yet.
- Who cares about all that?
Just tell me the
important stuff.
Does she have beans?
- You're in luck.
We had beans with
our meal last Friday.
- Ooh.
I can taste them now.
Jackpot.
- And then there's the janitor
who always wears
sunglasses, even indoors
and all I can say is this.
He loves cleaning the bathroom.
- Who loves cleaning
the bathrooms?
That's the worst job ever,
especially after a bean supper.
- We had Margaret
but we scared her every
day until she left.
- Oh, that's my type of talk.
We might be getting
along after all.
- Yes, but we can
only have so much fun
because of Officer Longbutt.
(Arizona laughs)
He's security and it's
impossible to slip one past him.
- Is that really his name?
- That is really his name.
- What's the story with
that goofball, Mr. Stevens?
- Well, he was just a clerk
but after Margaret left,
there was no one
else to give it to.
So he was made head of
the children's home.
- Well, he's annoying sometimes
but he doesn't mean to be.
He really just
wants us to be happy
and he tries hard to
make it good for us.
- That's not bad.
Only a few employees.
It'd be easy to sneak
out of this place.
- Wait a second,
do you hear that?
(cat meows)
That's Fat Daddy
and he makes staying
here worthwhile.
He's pretty much a
part of our family.
He's a cat, if you didn't know.
- There's a cat?
I love cats as much
as I love beans.
My life might not be
totally pointless after all.
(Arizona farts)
(soft chiming music)
- What's that smell?
(Arizona yawns)
- If you're done bothering
me, room service,
maids, whatever you
are, I'd like to rest.
- We're not your
maids or room service
and by the way, you stink.
You should probably
take a shower.
(Arizona farts)
- I think I made a
good first impression.
- Margaret hired you, right?
Okay, I wasn't here when she
hired you, what's your name?
- My name
is Di-Reha.
- Okay. (laughs)
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Is that your full first name,
was your last name included?
Apparently, I mean,
you're doing a good job.
I see you're resting.
Do you like working here?
- I love cleaning the bathroom.
- Well, keep up the good work.
(broom scrapes)
(anxious music)
(water trickles)
(anxious up tempo
electronic music)
(anxious up tempo
electronic music continues)
- No beans.
(utensil clinks)
(anxious piano music)
- [Harriet] What are
you doing in my kitchen?
I can see all things.
- I was just looking for
some beans, I'm hungry.
- [Harriet] You will
wait for your food.
I am in charge of
the meals here.
- How'd you see me?
- [Harriet] They say I have
eyes in the back of my head.
The children don't decide
and they don't snoop
around my kitchen.
No germs are allowed in
my kitchen. (sneezes)
(anxious electronic music)
- Ugh.
Gross.
(Harriet farts)
- [Harriet] Now it's
time for you to leave.
Wait a minute, you
do smell very good.
- Okay, look, I won't
come back in the kitchen.
- [Harriet] You are bigger
than normal children here.
You have a lot of
meat on your bones.
(tense dramatic tone)
Hmm.
- I just don't know, Freddy.
I think you're gonna scare 'em
but I think you're
gonna be my best option.
Can't fail with a reindeer, huh?
(upbeat Christmas-themed
piano music)
Reindeer it is.
- [Bailey] If Fat Daddy
did this, it'd be so cute.
- Am I bigger than most children
who have come through here?
- What's wrong?
You look like you
saw Santa Claus.
- I snuck into the
kitchen looking for beans
and I was sure
she didn't see me.
But boom, doomsday.
She caught me.
- Did she report
you to Mr. Stevens?
- No.
Even worse.
I think she wanted to cook me.
- That's silly, why
would she do that?
- Because I have a lot
of meat on my bones.
- Miss tough girl looks scared.
- I ain't scared of nothing.
- Oh yeah?
Prove it.
- I got one for you.
Last Christmas, it was 3:00 a.m.
and I was in one of the
darkest subways in America.
I was gonna sneak on
the train that night
and leave that place behind.
It was so dark, I couldn't even
see my hand in front
of my own face.
I was hiding in the shadows,
waiting to make my move
and then I looked down
and I saw a trash bag.
My heart started beating.
I was having trouble breathing.
I knew something was in that bag
that would change
my life forever.
But I didn't run, I went for it.
I slowly reached down
and opened the bag
and out jumped a rat
with teeth big enough
it could chew through your
big toe with one bite.
I opened the bag even
wider and inside I saw-
- What, what'd you see?
- Tell us.
Six baby diapers,
five pungent toe rings
Four zombie dolls,
three hairnets
Two chewed up gloves and
a picture of a girl that
looked like me.
- Ew.
That's gross.
Not so much the other
stuff, but the picture.
- Real funny but that's not all.
The train was about to leave.
I ran to get on it but
I slipped on some ice
and I went nose-deep
into those diapers
and I didn't even go to the
bathroom to clean my face up.
I got on that train
and there's nothing
scarier than that, girls.
Who was that?
- That's just the janitor.
- Intruder, intruder alert.
(mid tempo electronic music)
Patrick, it's an
intruder, intruder.
(mid tempo electronic music)
(Patrick crashes)
Mr. Stevens, I have an intruder.
(Patrick groans)
- Officer Longbutt, it's me.
- Mr. Stevens?
- Girls, I tried
to surprise you.
- Well, I guess you can't get
nothing past Officer Longbutt.
- Can't anybody get
any sleep around here?
(Patrick groans)
(upbeat ensemble music)
(soft violin music)
- So what happened to Margaret?
- I'm sorry, she quit.
- Oh no, why would she do that?
- I guess you could
say she got tired
of all the pranks they
were pulling on her.
- That's too bad.
- I'm the new director now.
- I guess I should
say congratulations.
- Well, I don't know if
it's a congratulations or
if it's 'cause they can't find
anybody else to do the job.
- How did the children
feel about it?
- Well most of the kids
were adopted this year,
so no one's really
gonna miss her.
- That's good to hear.
- Emma and Bailey
are still here.
I just don't understand why no
one ever wants the big kids.
These poor girls can
never find a home.
This is their third
Christmas with me.
Why not the older children?
There's no snotty noses, no
diapers to change, no tantrums.
I just have to find
a way to show them
that there's nothing
wrong with them
and that they can
still be happy.
I have to make Christmas
good for them this year.
I don't know how
I'm gonna do that.
- How about instead of
me bringing Christmas
to them this year, you
bring 'em out to my farm?
Maybe a change of venue
and some fresh air will
do 'em all some good.
- That's perfect.
Thanks for always being
here for the kids.
- It's my pleasure.
(upbeat music)
- I'm sorry, I lost
my train of thought.
Why did you come here again?
- To get the Christmas list.
- Okay.
(paper rustles)
Have a good day.
- I'll see you around.
- Where are you going, child?
- I'm just going to the
bathroom, is that ill*gal now?
- I'm keeping a
close eye on you.
- That's creepy.
Just don't do it when
I'm in the bathroom.
You know what?
If you think you're gonna keep
eyes on me all the
time, you're wrong.
I'm gonna beat you.
- In 57 years, I've
never lost at anything.
- You never lost
at anything, huh?
How about a hotdog
eating contest?
- Nope.
- Board games?
- Next.
- Card games?
- No.
- Swimsuit competition?
- Never.
- All right then,
I challenge you
to a game of pool
in the game room.
- You're on.
I never back down
from a challenge.
- Get ready to lose.
- And in case you haven't heard,
I'm bringing 57
years of experience.
- Oh yeah?
Well I'm bringing 16
years of a hard knock life
with a masters of street smarts.
- Get ready
'cause I'm getting
ready right now.
You're up.
(steady tempo ensemble music)
(pool ba*ls clacking)
(Longbutt groans)
I think I pulled something.
Your turn.
Oh, that was bad.
That was real bad.
Did you see how bad that was?
(Arizona groans)
(pool ba*ls clacking)
(steady tempo electronic music)
Oh yeah.
In, in, in.
I'm on fire.
(steady tempo electronic music)
I'm not even gonna look.
Wait.
(pool ball clacks)
(Longbutt growls)
Boo.
(pool ball clacks)
Come to papa.
Yeah.
(Arizona farts)
(Longbutt groans)
You think that's bad?
(Longbutt farts)
(Longbutt growls)
(pool ba*ls clacking)
(pool ball clacks)
(Longbutt growls)
- After 57 years,
how does it feel to
finally have lost?
(Arizona laughs maniacally)
I told you I could beat ya.
- You might have won this round
but you won't win the next one.
- Oh, mm.
Oh, these are the best.
Oh, I'm sorry, were you hungry?
That's too bad.
Mm.
(upbeat piano music)
- She likes beans, so
she's gonna get 'em.
(Bailey laughs)
(mischievous
Christmas-themed music)
- Let's see her fart
her way out of this one.
(Arizona sighs)
(beans splattering)
- They found beans.
This is the greatest prank ever.
I guess I have to
give them credit.
Wow.
Oh.
Maybe they aren't
so dumb after all.
(upbeat ensemble music)
(tin clatters)
(anxious Christmas-themed music)
(anxious Christmas-themed
music continues)
Help, there's a fire!
- Arizona.
- Help me, please!
- She's yelling for help.
- Help, there's a fire!
Help me, please open the door!
- Stop.
- Stop.
(water squirting)
(upbeat Christmas-themed
rock music)
- [Bailey] Your turn.
(upbeat Christmas-themed
rock music)
- How'd you get your
outfit cleaned so fast?
- One of my foster parents
owned a laundromat.
- I guess you didn't
clean it good enough
'cause it still
smells like beans.
- How long did it take you
to dry off from
your early shower?
- Ugh.
- You know, I'm gonna
call an early truce.
That bean prank was the best
prank I've ever experienced.
Brilliant.
So because it's
the holiday season,
I'm going to let
you into my g*ng.
- How can you have a g*ng
if you're only one person?
- Because now
there's three of us.
- Well, we were talking it over
and we do think the
water g*n was awesome.
But where'd you get it?
- I stole it from Officer
Longbutt's office.
- We've been trying to sneak
into his office for years.
Okay, you got two
new g*ng members.
- It was you.
You drank my yak milk,
I knew it was you.
I'm gonna keep my eyes on you.
You rotten,
nasty,
smelly,
furry
little rascal.
What was that?
Was that a threat?
You back up.
Don't get into my personal space
or I will have the
right to use force.
(Longbutt groans)
- Leave him alone,
Officer Longbutt.
- Ah.
(upbeat music)
- I wish we could do
something different
for Christmas this year.
I don't think board
games are gonna cut it.
- And board games are fun
but it's hard to stay happy
when everyone else got a family
for Christmas and we didn't.
- Well, that's what
the orphanage life
is all about, girls.
I got used to it
a long time ago.
- We were the only
ones who didn't.
- Hey girls, I got great news.
- Really?
- What, are we free to
leave and never come back?
- No.
Christmas is gonna
be awesome this year.
I have a special trip planned.
- Where to, a cemetery?
- Noel was in my office
and she offered to bring you
to her farm for Christmas.
(Emma chuckles happily)
- Ugh.
- Are they gonna
have horses there?
- Yes, she has horses.
- Will she have a bunch
of animals to pet?
- There are gonna be
a bunch of animals
and I'm sure she's
gonna let us pet 'em.
- Yay, yay.
- Yes.
- Dang, I was hoping
for a bean farm.
- I've been trying
to think of something
to cheer you girls
up for Christmas
and this is gonna be
better than board games.
She's gonna have
Christmas lights, snacks,
animals, fun things
we can all do together
and she has gifts for you three.
And you three try to plan on
how you're gonna be
on your best behavior.
- Maybe I'll get a
new iPhone. (laughs)
(upbeat ensemble music)
Whoa.
Nice shades.
What's your name?
- My name
is Di-Reha.
(Arizona laughs)
- That's your name?
Well, my name is
Arizona.
- I love
cleaning the bathroom.
- You love cleaning
the bathrooms?
But that's the worst place
in the whole orphanage.
You don't talk much, do you?
Well, have fun cleaning
the bathroom. (laughs)
(phone rings)
- Patrick.
- Hi, Patrick.
- Oh, hey Noel.
How are you?
- I'm fine, thanks.
How are you?
- I'm doing fine.
I'm just tidying
up a little bit.
- I was getting the
Christmas list together.
- Di-Reha.
No, no, no, I don't have-
- Diarrhea?
- No.
Excuse me, I'm sorry.
- Do you have a problem?
- I don't have a problem.
- Do I need to let you go?
- No, I was getting
something out of the trash.
The janitor sometimes
goes to the office
and he throws things away
that he's not supposed to.
- Oh.
- No, his name is
Di-Reha or Dia-Rhea.
- That's a very unusual name.
- Margaret hired him.
I don't have diarrhea, I'm fine.
Anyway, let's
change the subject.
Hey, you know what?
I got a new coffee maker,
you wanna try it out?
- Sure?
- Come on by.
(dial tone beeps)
- And here is where we
keep the hoard of clothes.
You can look around and
maybe find yourself an outfit
so you can finally take
that off and get clean.
- What's the matter with this?
It's not like I
smell bad. (sniffs)
Ugh.
- Well if you smell that bad,
security can smell
you from a mile away.
How will you ever escape?
- I guess you're right.
Fine, I'll change and you
can wash these when I'm done.
- Ugh.
Whatever.
(upbeat ensemble music)
(Arizona shrieks, whooshes)
(Arizona pants)
(mid tempo electronic
dance music)
(mid tempo electronic
dance music continues)
(mid tempo electronic
dance music continues)
(mid tempo electronic
dance music continues)
(mid tempo electronic
dance music continues)
- They don't call me a
trend-setter for nothing.
(upbeat music)
So, do you two remember any
Christmases from your childhood?
- No, not really.
- That's too bad.
I can't remember a lot either.
But I do remember quite
a few foster parents
but they were no good.
They always just used me for
chores and dumped me off.
- I have no memory of parents.
The only family I've
ever really had is Emma
and I guess you could say
I've always liked Patrick.
He's kind of been
like a father to us.
- Well, I do have this.
It's one of the only memories
I have from my childhood.
I used to sit all alone outside
and play with my
plastic animals.
They were like the only
friends and family I had.
- Enough of the mushy stuff.
Let's have some fun.
I saw Patrick
going to that attic
with a bunch of Christmas stuff.
Let's go up there and
see what we can find.
- Okay.
- Let's do it.
(dramatic
Christmas-themed music)
- Shh.
(dramatic
Christmas-themed music)
Wow, it's a big attic.
- A lot of stuff in here.
- This must be years worth.
Let's see what we can find.
(anxious music)
I found some Halloween stuff.
- Great.
- You hit the jackpot.
- We can use that to scare
security and maybe even Patrick.
- You're pretty good
with that broom.
But I've been trained in the
broom for many, many years.
Give it to me.
Let me show you
how to use a broom.
Step back.
Step back.
This is how you use a broom.
This is the beginning
and this is the after.
(Longbutt grunts)
(upbeat ensemble music)
(broom clacks)
That hurt.
(Longbutt grunts)
Ow, my knee.
(Longbutt grunts)
(broom clatters)
And then you keep sweeping,
don't be slipping.
Then you keep your balance,
then you sweep your way up.
That's how you use a broom.
(broom clatters)
Ooh.
But Mr. Longbutt, I...
(Arizona yawns)
I love that you have
57 years of experience.
- What is that?
Is that security?
(anxious music)
- Oh, thank you, thank you.
That means I would
be a good guy.
- Oh.
Who's he talking to?
- Oh yes, my dear.
Especially because
of the 57 years.
I like an older man.
I will take you out to get
some yak milk and a burger.
Maybe a cheesesteak.
Oh, that would be
lovely, Officer Longbutt.
(Arizona chuckles)
(record scratches)
Oh.
Get outta here.
I was just inspecting
the the few toys
that we do have to make
sure they're operational
and that there's
no choking hazards.
- Sure, you're right.
I've got you now,
Officer Longbutt.
(mischievous
Christmas-themed music)
I finally have something on him.
- Sorry to bother
you again, Noel.
- Yes?
- But I have a new girl that
just enrolled in the home
and I wanted to
know if it was okay
if I could bring her
to the farm also?
- Oh.
Yes, that's fine, that's fine.
- Great, you're the best.
- Anytime.
- I think it's time we put
some of those Halloween
decorations to use.
- What's your plan?
- This
is my plan.
Follow me.
(upbeat ensemble music)
(upbeat ensemble
music continues)
Come on, don't be scared.
- I'm not scared.
- I'm gonna put it right
in front of the door
so it's the first thing
he sees when he walks in.
Hey, he left the keys in
his locker, let look inside.
I told you he played
with dolls, I told you.
It's his mom, she looks
just like him. (laughs)
Let's just get
outta here, come on.
Wait for it, wait for it.
(Longbutt screams)
- Help!
No!
No!
(frantic music)
(spooky whistling)
(Longbutt screams)
(Longbutt screams)
(frantic music)
(Longbutt groans)
(Emma laughs)
It's a doll.
Those girls will pay for this.
I'm gonna report them.
(upbeat ensemble music)
(Arizona farts)
- No.
No, I can't fit in that.
- [Harriet] You are bigger
than normal children.
- I'm not bigger
than most children.
I'm not bigger
than most children.
- [Harriet] You have a lot of
meat on your bones. (echoes)
- Noel, I didn't expect you.
What a pleasant surprise.
- Oh, I thought
you invited me over
to see the coffee machine.
- Well, I did but I didn't
think I pulled that off.
I mean, I didn't think you
were gonna come by for coffee.
Can I make you a cup?
- I'd love that, thank you.
- I don't know about you
but I'm super excited.
This new machine is super fast.
I've only used the
old school coffee pot.
Wait 'til you see
this thing in action.
You just open it up, you
throw the cup in there,
you throw it down,
you put the cup there,
you push this button and
it comes out right away
and it shows you little cute
pictures and everything.
(Noel laughs)
Are you ready?
- [Noel] Yeah.
- And
voila.
- That's it?
- Yeah.
Oh yeah.
- Very fancy.
(soft piano, flute music)
- These little
pictures, see 'em?
- Yeah.
- Brewing.
There it goes.
Look at these little pictures
of coffee beans or
whatever they are. (laughs)
- Yeah.
- Here you go.
- Thank you.
- You get the first cup
from the new machine.
How about I make a cup of coffee
and we sit down in the lobby
and talk a little bit longer?
Have a seat, get comfortable.
I'm so glad you came by.
The girls were so excited
about the trip to the farm.
It cheered 'em right up.
- That's great.
- I'm excited too.
- I'm so glad.
- I've never been to a farm.
- Really?
- And I do love animals.
- Oh.
- Are you gonna have horses?
Because I told the girls
you're gonna have horses and
I didn't really even know.
- I do have a lot of horses.
- Really, can you ride 'em?
- Yes.
- You won't catch me on
a horse, I'm too scared.
(Noel giggles)
You know when Christmas is
over, I'd love to have 'em
over to the farm anytime
they're feeling down.
I mean, you're truly an angel.
- [Noel] I don't
know about that.
- So what are your
plans for Christmas?
- I'll just be home alone
watching Christmas
movies by the fire.
- Noel, I'm madly
in love with you.
- Oh Patrick, I love you too.
What about you?
Patrick?
- Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm just gonna be spending
it with the girls.
I was supposed to
spend it with my father
but someone's gotta be
here for 'em, you know?
Hey, we should do
this more often.
(soft piano music)
- I wanna love you, Fat
Daddy, but I'm scared.
I usually avoid getting
too attached to people
so I don't get my heart broken.
I had a cat before.
At a foster home I stayed at,
they had a cat named Oscar
and we did everything together
and every night, he would
sleep on my chest and purr.
It was the happiest
time of my life.
But one night, I
heard them talking.
They said they wanted
a younger child.
So the next morning, Oscar
and I had to say goodbye
and I'll never
forget driving away
and watching him
through the window,
knowing that I'd
never see him again.
So give me some time, Fat Daddy.
- Officer Longbutt,
sorry I'm late.
So how is everything?
- It has been very quiet.
I don't have much
in my monthly report
other than routine patrol.
- I've been meaning to ask you,
have you had any issues
with the new girl?
- None, nothing at all.
Nothing to report.
- Good.
Well, it looks like we
were able to keep Arizona
happy enough not to sneak
out or cause any trouble.
- Whatever you say, sir.
- I wanted to give
you a heads up.
I'm gonna be taking
the kids to a farm,
so it's gonna be
extra quiet for you.
You can use this time to
catch up on paperwork.
- I do need to do
some catching up, sir.
That would be good.
- What do you got there?
- Nothing, nothing sir.
I'm ready to get back on duty.
- Well, I'll keep you
posted if anything changes.
So you can get back
to your patrol.
- Okay.
Wait a minute, no she didn't.
No, she didn't go there.
She came here to this office.
That's what happened
to my water g*n.
I have her now.
- These pictures are amazing.
I wish I could draw like that.
- Yeah, where's Arizona?
What's taking her so long?
- I don't know.
She's probably sneaking
around the kitchen again.
- I'm right here and guess what?
It's time for me to sneak out.
- Sneak out where?
- It's top secret.
- Ugh.
Let's see if she can
get past security.
- Stop right there, young lady.
Security is here.
- Hello, Officer Longbutt.
- I caught you, child.
You snuck out.
- You don't have any
proof I was sneaking out.
I'm just enjoying
the nice weather.
- And that's not all.
On the video footage, I saw
you, you stole my water g*n.
- I didn't steal it,
I was borrowing it.
I had some cleaning to do.
- That's the last straw.
I think we need to have
a visit with Mr. Stevens.
- I think it's time you
stopped playing with dolls.
- Shh, don't, keep it down.
Someone might hear you, child.
Look, let's make a deal.
I won't say anything as long
as you keep this a secret.
- I just have one question.
Have you been playing with
dolls for 57 years? (laughs)
(Longbutt grumbles)
Anyways, if you don't mind,
I have places to go
and people to see.
(soft piano music)
You're right, Fat Daddy.
I need to make a change.
- Here's your outfit.
I thought I'd clean it
for you so you'd have
something awesome to wear
when we go on our trip.
- Whoa, what's
with the treasure?
- This is all my loot that
I've borrowed over the years
but I'm feeling kind
of bad about it now.
- Well if you feel bad about
it, then why'd you do it?
- I guess I was
just getting revenge
on the world because
no one ever wanted me.
- Well, we want you and I
have something to offer you.
- What's the offer?
- We have a sisters pact.
That means when we age out,
we're always gonna
stick together,
get our own place and celebrate
Thanksgivings, birthdays,
Christmases and all the
holidays together, always.
- That means no one gets
adopted without the others.
It's why we're still here
because we refuse to
let 'em separate us.
In short, we're sisters forever.
- Sisters forever?
Wow, I always wanted sisters.
- But no more stealing
'cause it's just not right.
We only want to do good.
- Got it.
But that's all right
'cause I'll think of
other ways we can
take over the world.
(Emma and Bailey laughing)
Sisters forever.
(relaxed music)
Oh my.
- You widdle cutey cutes.
- Oh boy .
- I want to start by telling
you girls how proud I am of you.
You were disappointed
for the holiday season
but you didn't let it beat you.
You had hope.
You had room in your
hearts for happiness
and that makes me happy
and I'm so happy you
all became good friends.
I knew you could do it.
All right, tomorrow's
our big day.
It's our trip to the
farm, are you excited?
- I can't wait to see the horse
and give it a big hug and kiss.
- I haven't been able to
sleep since you told us,
thinking about what kinds
of animals she could have.
- I guess I could
use some fresh air.
- Speaking of fresh air,
how's your issue been?
- [Arizona] I don't
have any issues.
- No, no, you know.
I'm not saying you have
issues, you remember.
- She doesn't remember.
- You know, since we
changed your diet.
- What are you saying,
I need to go on a diet?
- No, I'm not saying
you need a diet.
(Arizona, Emma and Bailey
farting in synchrony)
What's happening here?
Ugh, what's this, an invasion?
Wait, you had-
- No.
I've been teaching 'em my moves.
- Beans.
How'd you get beans?
- Well, we've gotta go
get ready for tomorrow.
Catch you later, Mr. Stevens.
(upbeat chiming music)
(upbeat chiming music continues)
(Longbutt snores)
(anxious ensemble music)
(mechanical monster roars)
(Longbutt screams)
(mechanical monster cackles)
(Longbutt groans)
I'm hoping there'll
be some beans there.
- Can't wait for those horses.
- Animals.
- Welcome, what do you
girls wanna do first?
- Animals!
- Animals it is.
- Baa.
(upbeat music)
(upbeat music continues)
(upbeat music continues)
(jazzy trumpet music)
There were candy canes
and jingling chimes
Christmas in the
good old times
When the snow fell down
on a fireplace space
Christmas in the olden days
Horns and candles,
heartfelt cards
Evening bright
all over the stars
You can sing along
to carols and rhymes
Christmas in the
good old times
Let's revive this
Christmas vibe
Share the love
you feel inside
Roasting chestnuts
on an open fire
Christmas in the
good old times
Homemade gifts
and wooden sleighs
Christmas in
those golden days
(upbeat jazzy piano music)
(upbeat jazzy piano
music continues)
- He's got it bad.
- Has what?
- A case of the love flu.
- You think so?
- Of course.
I've seen it lots of times.
My last director was so in love
with the case manager
but she never told him.
Just imagine her
despair when he ran off
with the IT girl to get married.
- Too bad for her, she
should have spoken up.
- Yep, you snooze, you lose.
Grownups are so weird.
They're always laughing and
giggling. (mock giggles)
I mean, why don't you
just come out and say it?
"I love you."
- Fear of rejection I guess.
Orphans know it best.
Oh, I got rejected again.
- What's new, right?
(Bailey laughs)
- We could teach
them a thing or two.
- We should, we should
help them get together.
- Why would we do that?
We should prank 'em.
- We could find mistletoe
and set them up to kiss.
- Yes, then they would realize
their undying love
for each other.
- Puke.
Ugh.
- Come on, we can't let him
keep embarrassing
himself like that.
- Yeah, pretty pathetic.
All right, I'm in.
(soft upbeat music)
So,
Mr. Stevens.
He's nice, isn't he?
- Oh, he's very nice.
- You two got a little
thing going or something?
- We're just friends.
- So if he asked you out on
a date, would you say yes?
(Noel giggles nervously)
- I suppose I would.
- I think he likes you.
- You know, we've been
friends for three years now
and he's never asked
me out or anything.
So I don't really
think he is interested.
- Maybe he's too
scared to say anything.
Maybe you should ask him.
- Oh no, I could never do that.
- Oh, does that
mean you like him?
- [Noel] Oh, shh.
- So why aren't you
married, Mr. Stevens?
- I don't know, I just haven't
had the time, you know?
All I do is work and
I don't really go
to the places where
people mingle, you know?
- So what do you think of Noel?
Isn't she sweet and
pretty and kind?
- Noel's a really good woman
but she's out of my league.
I couldn't try to
have a conversation
like that with Noel.
She'd probably think I'm weird.
- Well, I really
think she likes you.
- Why do you think that?
- Don't you see it in the
way she smiles at you?
How her eyes sparkle
when you're together?
She blushes every
time you're near.
- She does those things?
I've been totally clueless.
I really like her but I've
been afraid to tell her.
- I think you should go for it.
You should tell
her how you feel.
- I wouldn't know what to say.
I might be too nervous for that.
What if I blow it?
I could lose my only friend.
- No, you wouldn't
lose her as a friend.
She's too nice for that.
- I'm kinda nervous
just thinking about that
but I would like to
tell her how I feel.
- It is Christmas.
- I guess Christmas would
be the best time to do it.
- I think you're right.
- Well, it's about
time to go, you ready?
- Yeah.
- Let's go see
what they're doing.
- [Emma] All right.
- I'm so glad you
girls came out.
I had a wonderful day with you.
- [Bailey] Thanks for
having us, Miss Noel.
- You're welcome.
Let's do this again next year.
- [Bailey] All right.
(soft Christmas-themed
guitar music)
- It was a wonderful night,
thank you for everything.
- You're welcome.
- Guess I'll see
you next year, huh?
- Bye.
(soft Christmas-themed
guitar music)
- That might've been
the best day of my life.
- I've never had a foster
parent take me to a farm ever.
Those horses were so amazing.
- I loved that sheep.
He's the coolest cat there is.
- He's not a cat, he's a sheep.
What does that even mean?
- That just means he's cool,
he's hip, he's fab, he's fire.
Now do you understand?
- I think we're all just tired.
It's been a long day, we
should probably get some sleep
and you should
probably take a shower.
(Arizona sniffs)
- I don't smell bad.
Much mistletoeing and
hearts will be glowing
When loved ones are near
It's the most wonderful
time of the year
It's that time already, huh?
Look, please don't throw
away my important stuff.
You know we've talked
about this before.
I'm gonna take these
board games to the girls.
You have at it.
(Christmas-themed rock music)
(tense tone)
(door creaks)
- I know how it feels to break
your favorite pair
of sunglasses.
Almost like watching the
scoop on an ice cream cone
plop to the pavement on
the hottest day of summer.
You can borrow these
but a word of advice.
Don't wear sunglasses
indoors next time.
(up tempo electronic
dance music)
(up tempo electronic
dance music continues)
(up tempo electronic
dance music continues)
(up tempo electronic
dance music continues)
(up tempo electronic
dance music continues)
(record scratches)
- I say we stop messing around.
It's time to force our hand.
- I like your spirit.
You're right, if we leave it
up to them to take a hint,
it's never gonna happen.
- We need to march right in
there and tell it like it is.
- Yeah.
- I have a plan.
(mischievous giggles)
- Yeah.
- Charge!
- How can I help you girls?
- Okay Patrick, it's
time to cut the crap.
- I'm sorry, wait, wait.
I told 'em bring the beans
back and if you want,
we could plant a
whole garden of beans.
- A garden of beans?
No, this is about Noel.
- Noel?
- We've been trying
to set you two up
and let you think that
you did it on your own.
But this is ridiculous.
- You'll never figure it out.
It's time to take a
lesson from us kids.
- What do you want from me?
I don't know how to ask
her out, I can't do it.
- Listen, we already
have everything planned.
You're gonna call Noel and
tell her we have a request
to spend Christmas Eve in
a real home for Christmas.
She can't say no to
three little orphans
and here's the catch.
You have to be there to watch us
because we can be mischievous.
Am I right, girls?
- I can't ask her to do this.
People have traditions,
things they do on Christmas.
I don't want to bother her.
- You said she won't have
any family coming
over for Christmas.
She'll be all alone.
- And you're gonna
do it, or else.
- Or else what?
(Arizona farts)
Okay.
Yes, stop, okay, I get
it, I get the point.
I'll call her.
- That's what I thought.
(phone dials)
- And remember, this
might be your only chance,
so don't blow it.
- Hi Noel, I have a special
request from the girls
and if you're not
comfortable with this,
it's okay for you to say no.
I think they'll understand.
I mean, they really would
love it if you said yes.
Okay, they want to have
Christmas Eve at the farm.
They want to wake up to
presents in the morning.
They want to have a real home.
They want to feel like they
have a family for Christmas.
She said yes, she said yes.
Okay, legally I have
to be there with them.
So is there a place
for me to stay too?
And if there's not, it's okay.
I'll sleep in the car
or maybe a broom closet.
I'll just be a fly on the wall,
act like I'm not even there.
Lock me in the closet
if you want to.
Okay, great, six o'clock.
(Arizona farts)
I better, yeah, I better
go check on what that was.
Bye now.
We did it, we did it.
- Yes!
- See? (giggles)
(soft piano music)
(soft piano music continues)
(soft piano music continues)
(soft piano music continues)
- Isn't it beautiful?
A Christmas tree in
the window of a home.
- I don't think people
realize how lucky
they are to have a home
with a Christmas tree.
- Keep your heart guarded,
it's only for tonight.
- I know, but it'll be
the best night of my life.
- We've got each other.
We made a pact to
always stick together.
Let's enjoy this
as if it were real.
- All right, hit my music.
Yeah Santa, I'll
call him Big Red
I call it how I see
it 'cause he's overfed
Too many cookies,
will he explode
I saw him eat a whole
box, it was mighty bold
He overeats in his sleep
'til his belly gives in
He walks away weak 'cause
he's laying on a stretcher
He must not have heard
of three square meals
When it's time to eat,
you can count on him
(record scratches)
Hey, who turned the music off?
- It's been really nice
spending time with
you outside of work.
Every time I'm around
you, I feel happy.
I haven't felt like this
for a long, long time.
- You always make me smile,
no matter where we are.
- You know what?
Maybe I can come by and
help you out on the farm.
A pretty woman like yourself
shouldn't be mucking stalls.
- You have your
hands full at work.
How would you have
time to come by?
- I would make time for you.
- You would?
- I just have to
spill the beans.
We've been friends
for a long time
but ever since that first day,
I've been in love with you.
- Oh, Patrick.
I feel the same way.
- You're everything I love
and everything
that makes me happy
and I wanna spend the
rest of my life with you
and I love you, Noel,
with all of my heart
and I'd marry you
tomorrow if you let me.
- I don't know about that.
I mean, I'd imagine the
church will be closed tomorrow
for Christmas day but
maybe the day after that.
I just have one request,
well maybe three.
- Anything for you.
(soft piano music)
- This is something I got
for all of you girls
to open together.
- You know what?
I'm not the best reader,
you read it to us.
- "I couldn't bear the
thought of three little girls
not having a home of their
very own on Christmas day
and I couldn't bear the
thought of you going back
after having fallen in
love with each one of you.
(emotional violin music)
I hope that you will
accept my gift this year,
my heart and my promise to love
you for the rest of my life.
Not just me, but Patrick and
I have decided to get married
and we want to give you
parents for Christmas."
(emotional violin music)
(emotional violin
music continues)
- Come here, Fat Daddy.
Don't worry.
Fat Daddy is gonna live
with us from now on.
- [All Three] Yay!
- Oh.
(upbeat violin music)
- I thought we were
leaving for the farm.
Where are you going?
- I'm heading to the
office, remember?
There's a new girl
coming this morning.
When I'm done, we're all gonna
head to the farm, I promise.
Arizona?
You were just downstairs.
- Nah man, my name is Phoenix.
- Phoenix, Arizona?
(Phoenix farts)
You wouldn't happen to have
a twin sister, would you?
- Yeah, bruh.
You know how it goes,
it was in my record.
We got separated at birth.
- It's your lucky day, kid.
I have someone I would
like you to meet.
Gimme a second.
(upbeat music)
Oh, Arizona.
Come to my office immediately.
You're in trouble.
(rhythmic whistling)
(door creaks)
(Arizona spits)
(upbeat music)
(rhythmic whistling)
(upbeat music continues)
(upbeat music continues)
(relaxed Christmas-themed music)
(relaxed Christmas-themed
music continues)
(relaxed Christmas-themed
music continues)
(relaxed Christmas-themed
music ends)
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Parents for Christmas (2024)
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