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21x16 - Untapped Rage

Episode transcripts TV show, "Dimension 20". Aired: September 26, 2018 – present.*
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A tabletop role-playing game show produced by and broadcast on Dropout and created and generally hosted by Brennan Lee Mulligan as the show's regular Dungeon Master.

21x16 - Untapped Rage

Post by bunniefuu »

- [Brennan] A list of the topics, themes,

and subject matter
featured in this episode

has been included in
the video description.

♪ Here we go ♪

♪ T-T-T-Taking over, teenage rebellion ♪

♪ It's our time, it's our year ♪

♪ No more fantasizing about it ♪

♪ Everything's about to change ♪

♪ We're all gonna be okay ♪

♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪

♪ Hey, hey, hey, let's go ♪

♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪

♪ Hey, hey, hey, let's go ♪

Hello, one and all!

Welcome back to another thrilling episode

of "Dimension 20: Fantasy
High Junior Year".

I'm your humble dungeon
master, Brennan Lee Mulligan.

With me, as always, are
our Intrepid Heroes.

Say hi, Intrepid Heroes.
- Hi, Intrepid Heroes.

- Wow. Last we left off,

the Bad Kids emerged victorious

from the Last Standard
Exam, AKA the Last Stand.

Flawless victory, as a
prerecorded Arthur Aguefort,

with some premonitions of
what the Bad Kids might say

in response to his prerecorded hologram,

congratulated you on being

the first students of
his adventuring academy

to actually freaking get it.

- Yes.
- Yeah!

- Actually freaking get it for once,

and know that when someone
tells you you have to die,

you tell them to go f*ck
themselves, all right?

- Yeah.
- You slew all the monsters,

flawlessly answered all the questions,

kept Gavin Pundle alive

through round after
round of deadly combat,

and eventually saved your
academic adventuring party.

Kristen Applebees is
immune from expulsion,

as is Figueroth Faeth.

All of you received an A+,

which means that your downtime
for the rest of the year,

you don't have to roll academic tracks.

Given your earlier grades in the year

plus the extra credit
earned from the Last Stand,

it is impossible for you
guys to fail out this year,

even if you do not attend
a single other class.

- That's good to hear.

- I still do wanna find the
rogue teacher for you, though.

- Yeah, that's true.
- [Siobhan] Just on principle.

- Well, you can do that on your downtime.

On principle, yeah, absolutely.

With that being said, you
also witnessed in mid-combat,

due to an incredibly brilliant,

intuitive decision

to eat one of the Eyes
of the Vulture King-

imagine if you had never
bothered that vulture?

Eating one of the Eyes of the Vulture King

allowed you to see, hidden
under some Greater Invisibility,

Kipperlilly Copperkettle and at least

the hand of Oisin Hakinvar,

two of the adventuring
party members of Buddy Dawn,

your student Revivification cleric,

who was overseeing the exam.

Kipperlilly saw that she was made,

and slit Buddy Dawn's throat.

You discovered then
that both you and Buddy

had been pickpocketed during the combat.

- I hate her so much.

- With a teleportation, Oisin
and Kipperlilly vanished

as you watched Buddy
Dawn fall to the ground.

Gavin didn't even have
a way for you to get out

other than the fact that you
had Plane Shift prepared,

and took you to the Council of Chosen.

As all of you arrive

at the train station in Elmville,

it's about, I'd say, probably


in Elmville as the train
pulls in to the station.

This is the night before
your spring break begins,

so you'll have a week off.
- Do we have an assignment?

- No, you guys having your spring break-
- Oh, thank god.

- So we can tag along with someone else's.

- Actually, you would have
a spring break assignment

if you were having a normal year,

but having taken the Last Stand

basically is like, well, you're done.

You did all the stuff you need to do.

- Okay, I think we all need to make shirts

that say, "I survived the Last Stand."

- Great.

- We should go big and be
really braggadocious about it.

- Is there any way we can

tie it into the Kristen
Applebees campaign?

- Yeah!

- See what you can get in there.

- That's great.
- Ooh!

- You know, it feels rich.
- Right.

- Did you get any highlights
of Kristen on your necktie?

- Just the crime scene, mostly.

- You didn't get Kristen eating-

- We can use that as a green screen,

and I'll be in front of it.

- I think we might've got Kristen

jumping down with the
bar, but it looked...

Good? But I think some of it-

- It looked good, right?
- Yeah.

- We can get the AV
club to cut it together.

- These streaming things,
though, it's always weird.

- We can get the AV club
to make it look like

I wasn't kinda jolty.

- And then sort of talking
to the butter gummies

and saying it's all love now,

and then the butter gummies
also saying it's all love now?

But I think that footage isn't-

- Something like that.
- We'll use subtitles.

- Yeah, I think that
footage isn't salvageable.

- I think with the right song,

it would still look cool, though.

- Right.
- Yeah, I agree.

- Speaking of videos, Gorgug.
- Oh, yes!

- I should check on my phone.
I know, it's been on my mind.

I just really wanted to milk our victory.

- Which video is this?

- The crime scene.
- The livestream.

- What has happened to Buddy's body?

- You go back. No
Investigation roll necessary.

That was an extremely
smart trap to set up.

Scanning back through the
footage of the livestream,

I think Gorgug, you just punch in

an artificer pixel change
motion scan for it, right,

and about 10 minutes after you had left

from the coliseum and the Last
Stand, where you are set up,

you see that the screen
suddenly goes black,

and as it goes black, looking at the body,

approaching from behind the camera,

an enormous figure

in a massive cloak walks
up with its back to...

And when I say enormous,
I mean 14 or 15 feet tall.

- Sorcerer ain't who he says he is.

- Wait, what?
- You think it's Jace?

- What if Jace has been
disguising himself all along?

- Do I hear footsteps as it walks up?

- Through the recording,
give me a Perception check.

- I'll give you the Help action.

- [Brennan] Anyone listening can give

a Perception check here as well.

[dice rolling]

- Not good for me.
- I got a 24.

- I can do a Perception.
I realized I have plus 10.

- [Brennan] 24 from Adaine.
- 28.

- 28 from Kristen.
- Nice.

- The nice mortar stones of the coliseum

give you a good perspective,

as you just fought in
there for this huge battle.

So you're looking at it,
you know where the phone is,

and at first you're like, ooh,

there's someone walking
right in front of the camera.

And then you see that it
takes multiple footfalls.

I think you would rule out an illusion,

because you hear heavy foot...

Or it's just a good illusion, right?

You hear heavy footfalls.

On that 28, you see the light changes

on the stones ahead of the figure.

It totally eclipses Buddy's prone body,

and you see that the stones behind Buddy,

past the figure walking
away from the camera,

the stones behind him begin to glow red

as though there is a red source of light.

Either the eyes are powerfully glowing red

or there's some kind of red light

coming out of the front area,
like an amulet or something-

- The insignia.
- Insignia.

- What's going on with the guy in the gem?

- I was just gonna say,
do we still have the gem?

You're holding it, right?

- I produce Bakur.
- You produce Bakur.

You guys pause the video for
a second. You look at Bakur.

The gem glows with an
incredibly similar light.

- Is Bakur in there?

- I'm honoring a nat 20
from earlier this season.

You're looking at this stream through

the Gregorian Necktie, right?
- Uh-huh.

- That allows you to see
mitochondrial power or potency.

This is not Bakur. Bakur
is trapped in the gem.

But this is the red light of Ankarna.

And I think on that 20, as well,

there is another magical strain here,

like Bakur.

So in the same way that it's like a god

has their pure force of magic,

but then a high lieutenant would have

an elaboration on that.
- Yeah.

- This has a separate elaboration on that

that you do not recognize
from that original foray

in those books from Lydia's
old adventuring party.

- Okay, so not Kalina,
Porter, or Jace Stardiamond.

- Yeah.

- Probably-
- I will say this.

If you're ruling out Kalina, Porter,

Jace Stardiamond, whomever,

I don't know that you've
seen Jace cast magic, right?

- Okay. Okay.
- Does that make sense?

You don't have the fingerprints.

You can lift fingerprints
off a crime scene,

but if you don't have
them in the database,

it's sort of like-
- Okay. So we can't rule out-

- And we are talking
about 24-pointed stars.

Gem stars.

- Speaking of gem stars,
the figure in the video

kneels down over the body,
red light everywhere.

As it kneels down, Kristen,
I think you become like,

well, that rune is about
to go back on the thing.

However, what you see
is Buddy's body start

[grunting and seizing]

as the red light glows even brighter,

and you see splatters of blood,

as though Buddy's chest or stomach

is being shredded and mutilated.

And you suddenly see Buddy go...

[gasps]

[Brennan screams furiously]

You watch as Buddy is
brought back to life,

looks up, and goes, [breathing heavily]

"Dang, y'all. I worship
a nameless god of rage."

And you see that the
figure kneels over Buddy,

and both vanish.

- So did all of the Rat Grinders die

and get brought back to life?

- Maybe in the Chaos Mountains.

- Yeah.
- They died.

Something like that.

- But don't you feel, though, that...

What is her name? Kipperlilly?

Kipperlilly's real estate
dad and government mom

feel too perfectly place

to be manipulated-

- Maybe that's why they picked
their adventuring party.

- [Emily & Siobhan] Yeah.

- Wait, Kipperlilly's been angry

since freshman year, though.
- Let's look at those-

- Yeah, I wonder if she was
always a worshiper of this god,

or they saw her and went,

that is a person with so much

untapped rage-
- Primed.

- Yeah, let's look at
Kipperlilly's file here.

- Yeah.
- Find out why she hates Riz.

- Give me an Investigation
check for Kipperlilly's file.

[die rolling]

- Help.

- Cool.

[die rolling]

Well.

- Cutting Words.
[players laughing]

- 26.
- 26.

- Flash of Stupidity.
- Flash of Stupidity? [laughs]

- In Kipperlilly's file-
- Can I actually Guidance?

- Yeah, add it.
- I can Bardic.

- Oh, what if we get a 30?
Let's find out if we do.

[die rolling]

- The Bardic is a d10.
- [Siobhan] Flash of Genius is three.

- 29.
- Another Bardic?

- Flash of Genius!
- Flash of Genius.

- Okay.
- Flash of Genius.

- 32.
- Okay!

Okay, everybody.

- It takes a village.
- [Siobhan] It takes a village.

- [Ally] Takes a village to get a clue.

- We're all reading different
pages of this thing.

- [Brennan] It takes a village.

- It's like one of those
m*rder mystery boxes.

- Yeah, so guys are all at
the Elmville train station

at like two o'clock in the morning,

just going over the file.
- I'm drinking a Celsius.

- Me f*cking too!

- [Brennan] Everyone's drinking a Celsius.

- Pacing in a circle.
- That's right.

- What you see, looking at Jawbone's file,

Kipperlilly's grades are
incredible all the way through.

But what you notice is
that her accomplishments

in freshman and sophomore
year are pretty lackluster.

They chose adventures that
were not that impressive.

- They just wanted to succeed,

so they picked easy adventures.

- Yes.
- Got it.

- You see that Jawbone- you
look at some transcripts

of his notes, and it's very clear

that he is a little bit uncomfortable

with the amount of bitterness and hatred

towards you and the Bad Kids within this,

'cause Jawbone's obviously got

a personal connection to you guys.

- Right.
- So you see, in a weird way,

you know when you don't
wanna show favoritism,

you don't wanna show nepotism,

you don't wanna show an
attachment to somebody,

so you actually advocate for them

a little bit less than
a neutral person would?

A totally neutral person
would've been like,

hey, f*cking relax, the Bad Kids-

- Red flag, yeah.
- Yeah, red flag.

- That's nothing to do with you.

- Yes, nothing to f*cking do with you.

But someone who loves
you guys would be like,

"Okay, what would a neutral person do?"

and kind of get it wrong,
overcorrect, right?

Kipperlilly's rage, there is a part

that I think is probably very challenging,

as we sort of leave this rage thing,

very challenging for Riz.

There is a moment where Kipperlilly

talks about being jealous.

It's one of the first meetings
in her sophomore year,

where she talks about how jealous she is

that Kalvaxus k*lled your dad.

- Oh my god! She wants your tragedy porn!

She wants your story.
- [Siobhan] Yeah.

- She's uninteresting,
and that's why she's mad.

- Right.
- That is effectively,

what Fig and Gorgug say, is
what you see borne out by this,

in that her biggest complaint

in her sophomore year
meetings with Jawbone

is effectively that
her parents are boring.

Apparently, she got in trouble

because she broke into her
parents' private emails

looking for a connection to a conspiracy,

looking for a connection
to something sinister

or meaningful, and no such thing existed.

Her parents went to Mumple.

And she basically, over the
course of sophomore year,

is losing it, having rage outbursts.

At one point, she literally
is basically saying,

it should be adjusted for academically

if a person's family has suffered
intense magical hardship,

because that's an unfair
advantage in adventuring.

- And her response to
that was to be mad at us,

and not to k*ll her parents?

- Whoa, Adaine!

- Whoa, Adaine! That's the sociopath test!

- She's definitely the
only weird one here.

- In the files, on that 30, she does talk

about how much she loves
her adventuring party.

She is definitely the leader.

She refers to the other members

of her adventuring party as though-

- Anti-Fabian.
- Yeah.

- It's like a mirror of myself.

- You see that she has a
tremendous fondness for Lucy

and talks about how Lucy
is one of the only people

that sort of gets it.

Lucy and her were on the
same side of an argument

about not wanting to change
the adventuring party name.

In the therapy notes, it's like,

Kipperlilly came up with
the name, the High 5 Heroes.

Lucy was very supportive of it,

'cause it mattered a lot to Kipperlilly.

But the name "the Rat Grinders"

was pitched by Ivy and Oisin,

who she talks about as being
best friends within the group,

and that basically, Ruben voted for it

because he saw how much it
was upsetting Kipperlilly,

and then Mary Ann voted for it

and refused to explain her reasoning,

which seemed to be an ongoing
problem with Mary Ann.

- Yeah.

- Mary Ann would jump on decisions

and never join into discourse or debate,

just make a call and silently
be like, "I vote this side."

- What an absolute nightmare.

- I love her. We could use that energy.

- Gorgug breaks a bench.
[ax thudding]

- I like her.

- I'm desperate to be
hanging out with her.

- I just want her approval so much,

because I know that she doesn't give it.

- I don't even want her approval.

- Is this my origin story?
This is my origin story.

- All of the more recent stuff you see is,

Kipperlilly's hatred gets
even more out of whack

in this junior year,
the more recent notes.

She wants to m*rder Kristen Applebees.

Jawbone's been talking to her
about concealing her rage.

She basically thinks that all of you

are going to elect Kristen
Applebees as a joke

and then not even take the
office after you win it.

- [Emily] Can I do an Insight
if that's actually the case?

I got a nat 20.

- I got a seven. I'm gonna do it.

- [Brennan] I'm gonna do it.
- I'm gonna do the job.

- I'm gonna do the job!

You see that she's pretty clearly furious.

She hates Fabian because he's
the most popular kid in school

and he's helping this campaign.

She hates how omnipresent Fig is

in terms of denying her
access to get to Kristen.

- [gasps] She hates me
because I'm a German Shepherd!

- [Siobhan] Wow.
- Woof woof!

- You see there are some notes
from Jawbone here as well.

There are notes that the Rat Grinders

do have a spring break assignment here,

and you see that it is their second time

going to the Mountains of Chaos.

- [Siobhan] Huh.

- The last time they went
to the Mountains of Chaos

was probably about a week or two

after spring break last year.

- Right before Lucy died.
- Yeah.

- In which they actually
had a school chaperone,

because the assignment
was seen as being outside

of the sphere of their current ability.

- And who was that?

- Stardiamond?
- [Siobhan] Was it Jace?

- It was Jace Stardiamond.

- Porter.

- Porter and a raven.

- I still don't know about him.

- The other thing is, Jawbone
makes a note in this file

about moments where her
antagonism is justified,

where he notes what happened
on the first day of school

this year with the signup
for class president,

and Riz tried a little
pickpocket on Jawbone.

But you notice that there's a file there

where the meeting immediately
after that is really focused

on Kipperlilly being interested in Jawbone

because he was present
at the Prompocalypse,

because he was present at
the fight against Kalvaxus,

and has a lot of questions
specifically about Yes!

and about Kristen and about
how those events went down

and how the tide turned in that battle.

- Was this post the first trip
to the Mountains of Chaos?

- Yes, 'cause that was sophomore year.

- Okay, so it could be

that she just had an
authentic childish rage

which then, when they went
to the Mountains of Chaos,

was capitalized upon.
- Could be.

- Give me an Insight check with advantage.

[die rolling]

[die rolling]

- Dirty 20.

- You notice a change in
Kipperlilly's language

starting at the end of sophomore year.

Prior to that, she really
does focus a lot on,

"I just don't think it's fair."

In a lot of the places
where she's the most angry,

the anger subsides in a
moment where Jawbone is like,

"What's something you could do

to become a better adventurer?"

and Kipperlilly tends to get quiet.

In other words, you see
the idea of her rage prior

being kind of childish and genuine,

though her feelings are-
- Not the most sympathetic.

- ...not the most sympathetic,
the language changes

in the back half of her
sophomore year from,

"It's so unfair," "I think
Arthur Aguefort likes them more,"

"I think the school
takes it easy on them,"

"Half of them don't even go to classes,"

and then starting at the
end of last sophomore year,

it's flat out, "I hate them."

- Okay, I think she was just
arable land to plant a seed.

- I think so, too, and I'm
wondering if we can ask Jawbone

if Jace ever asked him which
students were suffering

from rage disorders, or if he went through

all the stuff.

- I kind of think that we
know the answer to that,

which is that Jace accompanied them.

So I feel like we can assume that.

- Yeah, but it might be that
Jace also got taken over

by whatever this thing is.
- True.

- I feel like Jace before was super chill.

- But is there something to the thing

you guys were talking about

with the students who've
kinda- like Molman,

and the person who kinda just got crazy

in my bard class that
one time for no reason.

- For no reason, after you
did a really cool trick?

- I just did a really insane-
- You did a pirouette, right?

Like a wet pirouette?

- A piro-wet?
- Piro-wet?

- A piro-wet.
- A piro-wet?

- Yeah, that's how some
people described it.

- [Siobhan] It's natural.

- The teacher was really moved by it.

- It was like a fluid movement.

- Was moved by your movement.

- Do you all know? Did somebody tell you?

- No, I don't know what
you're talking about.

What are you talking about?

- The fact that she's
interested in Kalvaxus?

Kalvaxus was a dragonborn

that then revealed himself to be a dragon.

Mary Ann's a kobold.

- Well, Oisin is also dragonborn.

- Oh, can we check the
video, and specifically look

and see if the really
big giant in a cloak,

if we see any scales
or anything like that?

- Yeah, give me Investigation here.

- Cool.
- Help.

- Thanks.

- I zoom in.

- Ooh baby, that's really good.

Ooh, that's c*ck. It
almost was a nat 20.

But you gotta honor the c*ck.
[everyone cackling]

You gotta honor the c*ck. You
simply must honor the c*ck.

- [Emily] That's my husband, baby!
- You must honor the c*ck.

- That's my husband!

- When you start to say the thing-

- Brian Murphy, you gotta
honor the c*ck. Brian Murphy!

- There's a camera here, a camera here!

- [Brennan] So is following
through and saying-

- f*ck!

Shut up! I didn't say anything weird!

- Put three minutes on the clock.

- [Murph] Edit it out!

- We need at least three
minutes to stay with this.

- We need to stay-
- Edit it out!

- Yeah, sorry guys, we
are gonna have to...

When you said it, I literally
saw the TikTok comments...

[Brennan mimics TikTok
comments beeping rapidly]

[Murph screams]
- You gotta honor the c*ck.

- [Emily] I'm getting it
in cursive on my forearm.

- I got a 20, but it was c*ck,

and you have to honor
the c*ck, so we leave it.

I did get a 19, though,
so don't laugh at me.



Not so funny now!

Is it? Huh?
- No, nothing funny.

- With that Investigation
check, you know for sure-

- I have to bio break to
barf. This is so funny.

- Honestly, the high roll proves
you need to honor the c*ck.

- On that 32- guys, honor the c*ck.

- [Murph] Everyone!

- Never been more proud of him.

- Let's honor the c*ck.

- On that 32 Investigation,
the figure never turns around

to reveal itself, but
just from studying it,

it does not move with the movement

of a creature with digitigrade ankles.

So you can rule out dragonborn;
you can rule out kobold.

- Humanoid?
- Giant?

- [Brennan] Humanoid.
- Giant.

- Much more like a giant
that you would have seen

that traditionally has typical
humanoid, non-reptilian-

but you can also rule out
anything with digitigrade ankles

like a tabaxi or something like that.

- Oh, okay, great.

- And we have one day
until spring break starts?

- Your spring break starts tomorrow, yeah.

- How tall is Porter?

- Porter is six foot six.
- Oh, okay.

- Yeah, he's humanoid.
- Okay.

- I don't know if you'll
let me roll for this or not,

but does it seem like
potentially the difference

between someone who gets
a crystal put in them

and is resurrected now with rage

or people who are left with
this crazy mark on their chest,

did they maybe deny getting to keep living

with rage, and Yolanda
and Lucy both denied it?

- That sounds smart to me.
- Kristen Applebees.

- No rolls necessary.

No rolls necessary.
- Wow.

Yolanda's so cool and principled.

- And that's why also, Ruben
said, Lucy stuck to her g*ns.

- Yeah.
- [gasps] Yes!

- Wouldn't come back.
- Yeah.

- What I would say is, on that
very good Investigation roll,

it's about a 10 minute gap
from when you guys left

to when this figure comes back.

So you watched Kipperlilly

leave the scene of the crime, come back.

So I leave it up to you to interpret,

did Kipperlilly leave, come
back in a more battle-ready form

with the ability to
bring Buddy back somehow?

Did she do it anticipating
that you would leave?

Or, if this is not Kipperlilly,

who could Kipperlilly and
Oisin have informed in time?

I will also say, looking at social media,

Ruben Hopclap's social media is deleted

prior to a little bit before
social media of last year,

except for tagged photos
from family and friends

where you can see that the whole emo thing

didn't start until after
spring break of last year.

- He became rageful

and switched up his
vibe, his musical taste?

- What kinda music was he writing before?

- Straight Jack Johnson. "Bubbly Toes".

- Wow, "Feet in the Sand".

- Wow!

- A grim whisper of,
"f*ck' 'Banana Pancakes'."

- So their upcoming spring break

is in the Mountains of Chaos again.

- That's correct.
- I think that we follow them.

However, I almost think
that we do it stealthily.

Also, do you guys think that Ruben

could be turned against them?

- I don't know, 'cause he's
worshiping this f*cking god.

- Yeah, I think they all
probably made the exact

same deal that Buddy did.
- I think at this point-

- He could worship Wanda Childa.

- Let's try to talk to the rogue teacher.

- [Emily] That's what I'm saying is-

- I mean, it could be that if
we can un-corrupt this god,

they'll be fine. Except for Kipperlilly,

who obviously needs to
be in the ground forever.

- Talk to who?
- The rogue teacher.

- Oh, yeah. Yeah.
- Yeah.

- So I think we're actually
going to move a little bit

into another stretch of downtime,

and a way more fluid one now that you guys

are sort of released from
your academic tracks.

- Great.
- So nice.

- That being said, the rogue teacher's

actually a couple towns over in Ashgrove.

- Okay.
- So you guys might have

some travel you need to do,
especially if you're considering

going to the Mountains of Chaos.

There's other stuff you wanna do.

What I will say is, the next morning,

so before we launch into downtime-

first of all, your parents
are very glad to see you.

I assume you explain to
everyone what's going on.

Sklonda looks at you, Riz, and
is like, "Hey, this is nuts.

You saw other students k*ll
a student at the school?"

- Yeah. Yeah.

- Okay, let me know if there's anything...

I know that we didn't get a chance

to get around to that
Frosty Fair stuff earlier,

but if there's anything
you need my help with-

- Could you look into Bobby Dawn?

There seems to be something
going on with a god of fire,

and Sol, maybe.
- Okay.

- Maybe it even has to do
with the Frosty Fair stuff.

- You know Bobby Dawn
went, as a young man,

to the Aguefort
Adventuring Academy, right?

You guys had heard that before.

- Of course.
[Ally laughs]

- You see that she looks
at you and says, "Hm, okay.

Does Fig know that Bobby Dawn
is teaching at the school?"

- Yeah.
- Oh my f*cking god.

- What?

- Do remember my mom was
in an adventuring party,

and she got into a relationship
with someone who was

already in a relationship?
- Oh yeah!

- And then they slandered her name.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah

Uh-huh.
- And got her kicked out.

Was it f*cking Bobby Dawn?
Who is Bobby Dawn married to?

- The chief paladin of the
Church of Sol, Pamela Dawn.

And you see Sklonda looks at you

and sort of slowly nods her head and goes-

- Sandra Lynn, messy! I love her so much.

- f*cking Bobby Dawn.

- She goes, "You've been very busy.

Sandra Lynn is very nice
to kind of, you know...

We go get drinks and talk
every once in a while,

just about having, you know,

wonderful, great kids who
are doing great adventuring.

I've talked to her a little bit,

so I know some of what went down.

But yeah, after Sandra Lynn graduated,

she joined an established
adventuring party

that had lost a member,
and this was before

Bobby Dawn was a very
famous televangelist.

This was back when he was
actually an active adventurer.

But yeah, not a great guy."

- Yeah, no, we could tell. Yeah, we know.

I don't know that we
realized it was this bad.

But I'm gonna talk to
Fig, and maybe she'll talk

to Sandra Lynn, and we can
find out a little bit more.

But yeah, he's definitely,
definitely not good.

- She nods.

You guys additionally get
some messages that day

from Gavin Pundle that says,

"Hey, the Council of Chosen
is going to follow up

with you guys, but the
body has gone missing

from the crime scene, and
we're looking for evidence

about what might have happened to it."

- Can we share our video?
- You share it.

Gavin Pundle gets back
right away and says,

"Thank you very much for this.

This is great that you guys-"

- Can you-
- Wait!

Yeah, sorry.
- I was gonna say,

I'm wondering if there's
a way that we can clear

Hilda Hilda's name with this aarakocra.

- What? By putting her at
the crime scene somehow?

- Yeah, you're right, we can't do that.

- No, I was gonna say,

we should make sure that
this is actually Pundle.

- Yeah, let's do an Insight check.

- Can we do Insight checks?

- Pundle, when are we getting that beer?

- I do it with disadvantage, actually.

- 25 Insight. Is this Pundle?

- Yeah, it's coming from his
email address. It's a safe...

- We send it to him.
- You send him the stuff.

He also gets back to you
and lets you guys know,

he says, "You're completely free

from academic requirements
for the rest of the year.

No need for studying.

We've already informed your teachers

that there's no need for
further examinations.

The only requirements for you to be able

to begin your senior year would be

to kindly fill out a teacher evaluation

for this current year,
and attend graduation."

- Okay.

- Attend graduation?

- Attend graduation. Oh, can I...

While I have my mom,

can I bring up the rogue teacher?

- Yeah.
- Mom, by the way,

I have not gone to go
out and meet them yet,

but I think I figured out
who the rogue teacher is.

- Oh!
- Have you heard of Eugenia Shadow?

- Eugenia Shadow?
- Yeah.

- There's a not-so-secret
secret organization

called the Society of Shadows.
- Okay.

- People think that it's
like a poetic metaphor,

but it's really based on the fact

that the founding family were the Shadows.

- Got it.

- Eugenia Shadow was, I
think, the granddaughter

of one of the co-founders
of the Society of Shadows.

But yeah, I never found her, you know?

But if you wanna go out,

Ashgrove's like a 90
minute drive out of town.

- Okay, great. Okay.
- Yeah.

By this point, Wilma and
Digby come to you and say,

"Gorgug, congratulations,
bud! We're so proud of you!"

- Thanks, Mom. Thanks, Dad.

I feel like I'm on the other
side of a lot of schoolwork,

and I'm feeling pretty good about that.

- Yeah, sure! So, we got
the Hangvan all fixed up,

if you wanna-
- Oh my god!

- Of course, of course!

You see they toss you a new set of keys.

They say, "It's our big guy!
You're growing up so fast!"

- Hey, thanks so much for doing this.

Can I ask you a question-
- Sure!

- ...before I go on to
do more school stuff?

How did we end up doing
the Frosty Fair here?

'Cause I heard that there were some...

I just heard some rumors
at school about, like,

some strange circumstances
on it ending up here.

- Oh, well, they reached out.

They said they'd lost their location,

and that they needed a location
that was within Elmville,

and they didn't have too many questions,

'cause apparently, one of
the big pieces of talent

actually was really the one
that put our name out there.

But, I mean, we've been
going to Frosty Fair

for years and years and years,

so I think we might've
just been on their radar.

They had some funny
questions about the tree.

- Our tree? Our house?
- Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Oh, what were they asking about that?

- Just structural safety.
Any termite questions.

You see he opens up an email chain

with some of the
organizers of Frosty Fair.

It's a couple people CC'd,
different venue organizers

who you believe- you can
see that the requests

they're communicating seem
to be on behalf of talent.

You see that the questions they ask

about the tree are its age, and then any-

because there's gonna
be arcano-tech present,

if there are any magical
instances in the tree

that they would have to be worried about

or that would interact with stuff weirdly.

So, you know, we told them,
the tree is a magical workshop.

We've enchanted the tree
to be able to stay alive

while it has the house in it.

Very simple gnomish
wood magic, folk magic.

- Did they have any questions
about the roots of the tree?

- They did. You see he opens an email.

He says, "That's a good point.

Yeah, they asked specifically
if the tree was a Root Warden,

which we said it was, and after that,

everything just sort of got smoothed out."

- What's a Root Warden?
- This is a funny thing,

where we don't have a druid
or ranger in the party.

I'm gonna need a Nature check.

- [Ally] I think I get advantage
on Nature. - I'll just crit.

- [Brennan] I'll just crit!

- I get a plus five to Nature.

- Can you show your mom?
- I got a 15.

I'll have Boggy give me the Help action,

'cause he loves nature.

Okay, I got a 21.
- Boggy does love nature.

- Nat 20!
- You are f*cking kidding me.

So, you worship a goddess who
is a goddess of Sylvan places.

A Root Warden tree is a
tree that is so magical

that it basically goes
from being an object

to kind of being a creature.

It's not like a full treant,

but instead of having
an Intelligence of zero,

it actually has an Intelligence
of, like, one or two.

- So it's like a pet.

- It's almost like a pet, right?

Even in the real world,
trees are able to communicate

across forests through their root network

and through mycelium networks
about frost coming early

or some big change
happening in the forest,

or start shedding your leaves,
or start growing buds again.

The Root Warden is basically a tree

that has a degree of magic

to be able to be a sentinel

for the trees of an area.

The Thistlespring tree,
due to the amount of magic

within it, is one of the oldest
tree homes within Elmville.

The Thistlespring tree is the Root Warden

for the greater county of Elmville.

- We should make sure it
hasn't been corrupted.

- I bet it has. I bet that's
what they were trying to do.

- Okay, I'm just gonna go to the tree

and see if I notice anything.
- Cool.

- I'll go into the basement
and see if I see anything.

- They did ask to clean out the basement.

That's why all of the dildo
machines were out on the lawn.

- That's right. Thank you.

- And the washing machine.
- Yeah, I remember.

- I do the exclamation point on it.

- Yeah.
- [Zac] Huh?

- I do the exclamation point
thing on the text thread.

- I reply to the dildo machine one

and write, again, dildo machine.

- And I reply to that, look into this.

- You see, somehow, the do
not disturb on the thread.

- I notify anyway.
- Notify anyway!

- [Ally] Notify anyway.

- You toss it. Go ahead
and give me a Nature check.

- All right.

- Now I'm wondering if this cloud thing

is being used to disperse
some kind of thing.

- Gertie's a ranger.

- Nature, I'm gonna use
Flash of Genius to get a 13.

- Okay. The tree doesn't
appear to be tampered with.

A 13's not the most high roll,
but as you're looking around

for signs of corruption,
you do not see anything.

Wilma and Digby come down with
you as you're looking around

and they say, "Is
everything all right, bud?

You seem stressed out."

- Well, there's some stuff going on

with an unnamed rage god, of course.

- Ooh!
- And I feel like

there's something going on with the soil.

I think all of Elmville's
possibly in danger,

in sort of a grander sense.

- Well, you know when they
came out here for the festival,

they did do a...

[thumps table]

They were doing a safety test.

You know, where are the
Porta-Potties gonna go?

Fire exits, that kinda thing.

When they asked us to
clean out the basement,

they did come down here and
do a little test on the tree,

just to test for the health of the tree

and make sure that it was...

They did a little thing.

They did some eyedroppers
out on the roots outside,

just to see if the tree
could pick up on them,

and it passed whatever test
they did. The tree was able to-

- So it absorbed something in the ground.

- f*ck.

- f*ck.

- And it's about to be spring.
- Can we get a sample of that?

- Yeah. Oh sh*t.

- So when sh*t blooms,
is that gonna be bad?

- Is there gonna be a
hate pollen? Rage pollen!

- Rage pollen.

- Yeah, we saw some stuff
on that farm that was-

- Yeah, 'cause didn't
we try to get the soil-

- As you mention the farm,
give me an Investigation check.

- [Siobhan] Yeah, we gave it to Molman.

- [Zac] Yeah, we gave the
mole man the soil from-

- And then he got insanely mad.

- And he got super mad. 29.
- 'Cause he snorted it.

- Molman snorted the soil.
- It was in your sh*t!

- What?
- What was in your sh*t?

- It was in your sh*t as
it sprayed everywhere.

- [Siobhan] Oh my god,
what have you been eating?

- Who told you, okay?
- [Siobhan] What was in that fried rice?

- Who told you?

I mean, I don't know what
was in the fried rice.

I don't know.
- [Murph] There is something-

- Was it just kinda old?

- I mean, it was definitely old.

- Yeah, there is something,
we should clock that-

- My sh*t?
- Not your sh*t.

Just that something was
taken from your house

that was like an air thing,

and we always had the
lo-fi study things there.

- Something is being distributed.

- [Brennan] What'd you roll
for your Investigation?

- 29.

- As you are talking it
over with your folks,

they give you a little map of the area

that the Thistlespring tree
serves as a Root Warden for.

You see, Riz, this is something

that you would have assumed naturally,

but you are looking at it on a map,

that Loam Farm falls a good distance

outside of the root network
of the Thistlespring tree.

So I think you're looking
at it and going like,

if Loam Farm was the
venue for Frosty Fair,

fair and square, they have been picked

the previous year as the next location,

that they would not-

it's almost like the Thistlespring tree,

by acting as a protector of this area,

kind of creates a boundary.

It creates a pocket.

- Yet another righteous
protector being corrupted.

- Everyone else's parents,
again, very, very proud.

I will say, just going around real quick,

you get a response on your
inter-Hell communications device

once again from Bill.
- Oh, okay.

- [Brennan] Hallariel is off
somewhere. She's on the cruise.

- Come back to my empty...

All right, yes.

- Well, she has doctor's
appointments to go to.

- Her face is getting tight.
- Oh my god!

- No, stop, stop! It took me a second.

I was like, for what? And then I realized.

- [Brennan] Fabian, you get
a text from Gilear, saying-

- No, I don't.

- "Your mother would love
you to check in the attic.

There should be a box
marked baby clothes."

- Ha, ha, ha.

- A beautiful pirate ship-shaped crib.

- Great joke, Gilear. For what?

- You get a little heart tap back.

- That's the most stone cold
response Gilear has ever had.

- Again, Gilear is back to being unlucky,

but his curse is broken.

He has self-esteem now.
He does love his life.

- He deserves this.
- He deserves this.

- Cut to Fabian on the
lawn, all of that on fire.

- You're burning all your-
- [Ally] On the lawn! On the lawn!

- [Brennan] You're just burning
all your own baby clothes?

- We won't need these. I
don't know why he even asked.

- Fabian is the bad seed.
- [Ally] Wow!

- Your dad's-
- I'm wearing my dad's coat.

- [Brennan] Incredible.

- This crackle, kinda beautiful sound.

- [Siobhan] Crying into eyepatch.
- [Zac] Lighter fluid.

- [Siobhan] Move your eyepatch over

so it soaks up the tears.
- Exactly, switching eyes.

- Oh, by the way, you also
get 20,000 gold pieces,

'cause we haven't kept up with all that.

- Great.
- Sick.

- Oh, we do definitely
shake him down some more.

- Oh yes, we're doing runs.
- Okay.

- We're getting teleported
to Bastion City.

- Mac and Donna reach out to you, saying,

"Got the letter at home that
you passed cleric classes.

Glad that Mr. Dawn

sees that you're doing well."

They don't know what's going on.

- Yeah.

- There's something in
this message that they send

where they just go, "If you could check in

to make sure Bucky is
attending his classes."

- Bucky's skipping school?

- That's all they say, yeah.
- Sure, I'll check on Bucky.

- Adaine, Aelwyn starts to
come back by Mordred again

'cause she has accepted
the job in Leviathan,

and the easiest commute is to
just come to Mordred Manor.

It has the door into the
Compass Points Library.

- You can just move back in, if you want.

- You see that Sandra Lynn looks at her

at this kitchen table and is like,

"We'd love to have you, Aelwyn."

- She'd love to have you, Aelwyn.

- Aelwyn looks and says,
"Does this invitation

extend solely to me, or to my 15 cats?"

- I can make room for them.
[Brennan snorts]

- I start setting up a
chicken hutch for them.

- Yeah, we have a catio
into the graveyard.

- We have a catio!

- We turned the graveyard into a catio.

- I just don't know what
Emily meant by make room!

We can make room?
- You guys kick Kristen out.

- It sounded so sinister.

It sounded like there
were 15 worse animals

that you were going to get rid of.

- We can trim the fat around here.

- We can trim the fat.
I think I know exactly-

- Kristen, you're out. The cats, in.

- All right. They live in
my, like, cathedral room.

- They can move in with Fabian.

- What the hell are you doing here?

- I'm bringing the cats.

- Aelwyn does actually move back in.

- [Siobhan] Hell yes.

- Moves back into the bunk bed.

- I make a point of being
kind of rude to her,

but in the way that she likes,
so it's not all super sweet.

- Yeah.
- I'm like, nice outfit.

Clown!
[all laughing]

Keep walking to breakfast.
I look back, is she smiling?

- Don't talk to her like that.

- The first time she does that,

let me see how she does
measuring how hard to come back.

That's a five, so you're
like, "Nice outfit, clown,"

and she's like, "Oh, you don't like this?"

[Ally stammering nervously]

- Looks like sh*t.

- Ah, I understand.

Well, I'm trying to
dress for the job I have

which is librarian, but
dressing like someone

who wants the whole world to know

that they're desperately
alone is another option.

- Kristen hugs her staff.

- Actually, don't talk to her like that.

- She goes, "No, we're playing!

You wear the same tracksuit every day.

You know that's not right."
- Yeah. Yeah!

I forgot something in my room!

- Sometimes she dresses as a cowboy.

- I get behind Aelwyn for a tabletop.

- What are you doing?

- [Brennan] You get behind
Aelwyn for a tabletop?

- Kristen, if you don't-
- I'm running, I'm running.

No, I just forgot something!

- Aelwyn turns down to
look at you and says,

"Drop something?"

- [Ally] I forgot something!

- I was acting like a f*cking cat,

'cause you love 'em so much!

And I give her a wet willy and run.

- The wet willy gets her way
more. [screams in disgust]

No!

Mordred is lively. There's
very fun study sessions.

Now that you have free time, Adaine,

Jawbone comes up in the morning

with breakfast for everybody.

Fig, you know that Gorthalax
is very, very proud,

asks if you need any help

with any of the infernal stuff going on.

He's like, "I'm always here
as a resource for that."

I think you can tell is
a little bit stressed

about the Owlbears' chances
at the end of the year.

- Damn, I want to, in this
downtime, I took Simulacrum,

and I wanna make a simulacrum of Kristen.

- Do I have to take my clothes off?

- Yes, unfortunately.

- Aelwyn goes, "You should, absolutely."

- I also disrobe.

- I take off all of my clothes.

- Otherwise, the simulacrum
will just grow its own clothes.

- Okay.

- And that'll be a part
of its skin, so yeah.

- I'm in a heart rate
monitor and a G-string.

- So I'm just gonna
sprinkle this ruby over you.

- You're not looking, though. You missed.

- I think I'm good.

- You guys don't have to
livestream this to me.

- Come on! We're on a group FaceTime!

- I'm okay. I think I'm okay.

- I just feel like we all
need to be here for this.

- I'll hold the phone with my feet.

- The absolute worst view you
could get of a naked person.

- I'm wearing a heart rate monitor!

- Over your n*pples.
- Pulled up.

- Incredible. You create a simulacrum.

- Yes, so that simulacrum can cast spells,

looks exactly like Kristen,

except it's kind of Adaine's idea of-

- [Ally] It's British.
- It's slightly British,

because it's an Adaine
impression of Kristen.

- [vaguely British accent] I'm Kristen.
[players laughing]

- And it can cast spells.

The only thing that is different,

it has half the hit points that you have.

- Oh, okay.

- I say, my president.

My president?

- I'm your president.
- They're both naked.

- [vaguely British] And
I'll be in the garage.

Completely naked.
- [Siobhan] New Kristen!

Put your clothes on!
- I'll be in the garage!

- Wait, this is amazing for campaigning!

You can literally be
in two places at once!

- Yes! Are you good at public speaking?

[vaguely British] Yes.

I feel psychotic.

- This is my favorite thing.

- Very pointedly talking to yourself.

- I dress the British
me in some Wranglers.

- [Brennan] So now there's a
little added layer of safety.

- Yes.
- As your spring break begins,

is there anything that needs
to happen before you guys move

into all the mystery, downtime,
investigations, yadda yadda?

Which, I think, Mountains
of Chaos is there.

- I wanna do two things about Kipperlilly.

- Okay.

- I wanna cast Legend Lore on her.

- Okay.
- Using the file that we have,

just to see if there's
anything that we're missing.

- Mm-hmm.
- And I want to Scry on her.

- You cast Legend Lore on Kipperlilly.

You gain no information,

which tells you that she is
not of legendary importance.

- She would hate that. God,
I wanna tell her that so bad.

Hey, what up, b*tch?

I cast Legend Lore on
you and nothing came up.

Can I cast Legend Lore on Riz?

- [Brennan] You cast Legend Lore on Riz,

and Riz is of legendary importance.

- It says, "Honor the c*ck."

- f*cking legend!

- Honestly, as Legend
Lore happens, you hear,

[imitates drumbeat]

[deep voice] "This is another
use of the Legend Lore spell."

- Oh, I think I know your brother.

- Hm?
- What?

- My brother?
- I think so.

- Ah, the Identify spell?
- Yes.

- Yes, how quaint.

Identify's quite good at all
of the sort of miscellany

and various minor arcana.

I trouble myself exclusively
with matters of...

Legendary importance.

- All right, okay. Riz
Gukgak, what do you know?

- Ah, Riz Gukgak, fifth
of the world of Spyre

to summon the Night Yorb
into this plane of existence.

Which makes you realize
that you are like a heading

in a larger Wikipedia
article about the Night Yorb.

- Okay, look, that's
something to build off of.

- My link is red. We gotta get that blue.

- Citation needed.

- Okay.
- Scrying on Copper-

- On Kipperlilly.
- Copperhead.

- I'm gonna say that she has

a minus four on this saving throw.

- Whoa.
- Yeah!

- Because you have her file with you.

- Yeah.
- Ooh!

- Oh, great.
- Hot dog.

- Okay.

Give me an Arcana check with advantage.

[dice rolling]

- 26.

- You do not get a confirmation
or visual of Kipperlilly.

- Is it because she
passed her Wisdom save?

- She failed her Wisdom save,

which is what the Arcana check is for,

because you clock a Nondetection spell.

You are able to see the
spell that is protecting her

from divination or scrying right now.

- Okay.
- Which means that you know-

- So they, I mean-
- They know.

- They know that I am who I am.

- They know that you are who you are,

and I think more to the point,
you know that Kipperlilly

saw Kristen see her.
- Right.

- So I think the Nondetection
confirms, I think, for you,

that this spring break adventure

is a full "go to the mattresses."

I think the fact that there is a-

- This is their last stand.

- Without even having
to spend spell slots,

I'll allow you to follow up

on some of the other Rat Grinders,

and you get the same confirmation.

So whatever they're doing,
they're burning through...

You know Nondetection lasts eight hours.

Three times six

is 18 castings of a 3rd level spell a day

to get them fully covered by Nondetection.

So you would imagine that
this is a full court retreat.

Her getting made in the Last Stand means

that they have had to go
completely off the grid.

- Yeah, and there's nothing
I can do about that at all.

The spell has no saves or anything.

It's just, you are safe.
So they're scared of us.

- So does that mean
that they're elsewhere?

Can we ask around?

- They could be the next house over.

Traditional investigation
means could track them down.

- It does mean that they are
on the same plane of existence

as us, which I do think, that is-

- [Brennan] Oh, that's a great point. Yes.

- I think we know they're just
getting ready for their trip.

- I think so, too.

Let's go to the freaking graveyard.

- [Brennan] Hell yeah.

You guys head off that
Saturday to Ashgrove.

- [Siobhan] I'm gonna turn on

my see Ethereal Plane vision.

- You head over to
Ashgrove and arrive there

later that night over in the cemetery.

It's another little suburban town,

way sleepier and more quiet.

You realize how strange Elmville is,

and how dominated by the
adventuring academy it is.

Adaine, looking into the Ethereal Realm,

you approach a very old,

lichen-covered headstone

up in a family plot. And
as you sort of wipe away-

- Adaine Abernant? I'm kidding.

- You see the name-
- I'm kidding!

- You see the name Eugenia Shadow,

who died at 111 years old.

- Special number.

- Eleventy-one.
- Eleventy-one.

Looking at the headstone
here, as you all stand here,

you become aware, with
your ethereal sight,

that there's an ethereal presence,

but you can't see it.

You can sense it, but wherever you look,

you're not able to see it.

- She's hiding. She's so good at hiding.

- I have Blindsense now.

If you're able to hear, you
are aware of the location

of any hidden or invisible
creatures within 10 feet of you.

So I would like to look around.

- As Adaine is sort of looking,

you get a reflection of your wristwatch,

and you can see a floating, translucent,

ancient halfling woman,
frizzy hair that goes

all the way down to her ankles,
that kinda becomes smoky.

She is flying, she looks panicked,

and you see that she is hiding

directly behind Adaine's head.

So as Adaine's looking around,

she's like [panting squeakily]

and she's in the Ethereal Plane.

- I do, gotcha! I just tag her.

- All of you see a ghost
scream into existence going,

"No!"

- Two in one year. That's
embarrassing for you, huh?

- Deeply.
- Okay, Adaine! Jesus!

Respect your elders!

- You see she says,
"This is the same person

that when she found out
the prior Oracle had died,

dunked on her a*s!"

- Okay, well, so you know about me, too.

That's good, that's cool.

- I know everything. I
know absolutely everything.

- How? Can I?

- What number am I thinking of?

- You're not thinking of a number at all.

- Right!

- You see she looks over and
says, "Scamps and scallywags.

You've all come here after long searching

for the rogue professor of the
Aguefort Adventuring Academy.

You've been looking for
me in the Ethereal Realm,

all around you, with your
sense of the invisible.

You've been breaking
into the teacher's lounge

and eating my steaks."
- Oh!

Can I smoke here, by the way?
- Yes, it's outside.

- It is a graveyard.
- It's outside.

- You're gonna ash on someone's grave.

- Can I have one?
- Yeah, absolutely.

- Ugh, cloves. You are a teenager.

- So you've been watching us.

You're not just hiding.
- Watching and waiting.

I've been instructing the rogues

in my own fashion for many years.

- Do you-
- She took the tiniest drag!

- [Murph] So tiny. You have another one?

- This is a joint.
- Oh, sh*t. Okay.

- Joint and a clove cigarette.
- Rock and roll!

- Yes.
- Can I hit that?

- Yeah. Puff puff pass, as they say.

- Everyone's been trying
to push drugs on us lately,

so they haven't felt cool.
- Yes, and now the teacher-

- Yeah.
- [Siobhan] Smoking with a teacher-

- And you've already
passed your academic year.

Congratulations on your
Last Standard Examination.

- Thank you.
- [Ally] Were you there?

- I was there at the founding

of the Aguefort Adventuring Academy.

- Were you at our Last Stand
where someone got iced?

- No.

That was another plane of
existence, so I did not attend.

- [Ally] Oh, I see.

- [Murph] I found out when-
[Brennan puffing]

- Riz?
- Skip me. No.

- I did some.
- We're celebrating!

- I think I did it wrong, but I did do it.

- You have to smoke this, or I'll lie.

- You're not a real teacher!
- I am a real teacher.

I teach rogue class! We
break laws! We do crimes!

- I think this is an indica.
I don't wanna get too sleepy.

- When Kipperlilly handed in

her assignment for the year,

we found out that she did
not find you, you found her.

[can hissing]
[Siobhan coughing]

Are you drinking a beer?

- [Lou] Do you have any more of those?

- [Ally] PBR?
[Siobhan coughing]

- PBR. Are you all right, young lady?

- [coughs] Yeah.

- Is this the first
time you've ever smoked?

- No, I've done it a lot of times.

- Loser!
[Emily cackling]

- Honestly, should I multiclass?

- I'm thinking so, too!
- To what?

- To rogue!
- Rogue class is a ball.

I never teach. You never have to listen.

- We all got an A in rogue class, right?

- No, just me!
- Just Riz. Young Riz.

- Yes. I had to look for you
really hard, but you just...

You found Kipperlilly.
What's the meaning of that?

- I found Kipperlilly
because she was standing

right where you're standing,
with a rented backhoe.

- Who did she dig up?

- She didn't have to dig up anybody,

'cause I got here in time
to defend my resting place.

- She was gonna dig you up?

- That's right.

- Why? to prove that she found you?

- Psychopath! She found your body?

- Yep.
- It was gonna be,

if the bylaws changed, then
maybe finding the rogue teacher

could just be finding her body.

- Kipperlilly, as a student,

has always been most
fascinated by the marginalia.

Technicalities, loopholes, et cetera.

- What kind of rogue is she?
- Generally being annoying.

- I assume you have noticed her
lack of reliance on weapons.

She doesn't really parade them
around. She is a mastermind.

Kipperlilly and you, Riz...

What is that short for? Rizbert?

- Just Riz.
- Erizabeth?

- Just Riz.
- All right.

- I thought it was Rizbert.

I think he's being shy. It is Rizbert.

- He's a little shy. Rogues,
it's hard to change gears.

Those of us who lives our lives

in the shadows sometimes tremble

at the thought of stepping
into the limelight.

- I was a Whispers bard, so I get it.

- Mm, absolutely.
- I was, at one point.

- I reach into the ice chest-

- I'm glad you're all getting
along with my teacher.

- ...and get a hard cream soda.

- You see that she goes, "Absolutely.

Well, the important thing is this, Riz.

There are similarities
between you and Kipperlilly.

I'm afraid that if Kipperlilly had

walked a brighter path,

she might have ended up more like you.

You're the only two students who, I think,

had the resources to look
deeper into the challenge

set forward to the rogues there.

All of the rogues assume
finding the rogue teacher

is a simple matter of perception,

that I would be hiding
somewhere on campus.

Whereas Kipperlilly took
the mastermind's approach,

thinking, well, I will force
the rogue teacher's hand by

finding something of value,"
[can crunching]

you see she takes out
a small stereo speaker

and puts on some music.
- Is this Fetty Whap?

- Yes!

By finding something of value to me

and attempting to destroy it,
the mastermind's approach.

Why find me, when you
can force me to find you?

- Right.

- You took the investigator's approach.

Long months of work, and
eventually tracking down

the means that your opponent
had used to discover me.

Very resourceful, Mr. Gukgak.

If you have any other
questions about Kipperlilly,

I'll be happy to answer
them, but I would say,

something very foul is afoot.

I believe it was within her power

to discover my grave much
earlier, but she waited

until the last possible moment
in order for it to apply

to her junior year academic calender.

For all of her vast
resources, I don't believe

that the location of my grave

exists anywhere in record,

other than in Arthur Aguefort's office.

- So she got into
Aguefort's office somehow?

- Potentially. I don't know

how she would have been
able to do that without-

- She was working with Stardiamond.

- Stardiamond's either
been corrupted or has been-

- [Brennan] Who's the
current, are you aware-

- Mazey, technically.
- Mazey Phaedra.

You see she leans in and says,
"What you have to understand

is that whatever order you perceive

at the Aguefort Adventuring Academy

is far more fragile than it appears.

Even with Mr. Stardiamond
acting as vice principal,

you must remember that the
position of vice principal

was created with a single being in mind,

that being the dragon Kalvaxus.

The position, powers,
principles and authorities

of the office of the vice principal

are thus extremely limited.

By becoming vice principal,
Mr. Stardiamond may be

immensely restricted in
what he can and cannot do.

- Who writes the bylaws?
- The principal.

- So he has to listen to the
principal no matter what.

- Exactly.
- And the principal is Mazey?

- Exactly. In a normal high
school, the vice principal

would assume some power and responsibility

should anything happen to the principal.

But of course, Arthur
would've never written that

knowing that his vice
principal was his worst enemy.

In that way, I would just say two things.

I would keep young Mazey
close to the chest.

- Can you text Mazey?

- Yeah, will you please text Mazey?

- Hey, Mazey.

Just checking in.

Maybe you wanted to hang
out over spring break.

- Do you wanna take a picture?

- Okay, yeah.

Everyone get close so you
can't see the graveyard.

- No no no, just you.
- Oh, just me?

- Send her a solo photo.
- But not a selfie.

- Can I borrow your glasses?

- Can we get as many beer
cans in there as possible?

- Hold my hard cream soda.

- This doesn't look as
cool as you think it does.

- All right, The Ball.

I think I know a thing
or two about being cool.

Giant tattoo?
- Flattering angle!

[camera snapping]

- Great.

- You see that Eugenia says, "Very cute.

Mazey is an accomplished
bard in her own right,

so I wouldn't worry too terribly.

But," you see that she
takes out a little thing

and goes, "now, [swallows] I
want all of you to remember-"

- Was that acid?
- Upper or downer?

- Yeah, upper or downer?
- It's a bird tranquilizer.

- Oh.
- Bird tranquilizer.

- I'll do that.
- That's light.

- It's incredibly light.

It'll put a bird right to
sleep, but for a person-

- The Ball, you can-
- You were driving.

- It's so fun. Oh, whoops.
- I'm driving. I'm driving!

- Yes, The Ball has got his whole setup,

you know, where he's underneath the wheel.

- [Brennan] Secondarily-

- I've just been so stressed out.

- [Brennan] Secondarily-

- Can you throw me one
of those little seeds?

It's a dosed seed, right?

- I'd like to remind
everyone here, as well,

that the Aguefort Adventuring Academy

means vastly more than just
its status as a school.

The Aguefort Adventuring
Academy is at the nexus

of several incredibly important,

significant magical workings

that Arthur left upon the world of Spyre.

You've seen it before, the fact
that the prom king and queen

were going to constitute the return

of a prophecy in your freshman year.

The fact that Arthur holds onto a number

of the world's great
powerful evil artifacts.

The Crown of the Nightmare King.

So, Mazey seems to be a
responsible and kind young woman.

If she were to...

I feel that the only reason

she is alive right now,

given everything working
against the school,

is that if she were to pass away,

there actually would no longer
be a structure to Aguefort.

No one else could assume power.

The vice principal would not
arrive to power in her absence,

and there would just be a form
of chaos and leaderlessness

until such time as an
election could be held.

If there was a way of getting
that power by just removing

the current acting principal,
the student body president,

I think Mazey would've
been dead a long time ago.

- So if Copperkettle gets-
- So she's probably safe.

- Did you hear back?

- We were talking to the other Kristen.

- Yeah, we're talking to the
other Kristen, but thank you.

- My bad.

- There's one very important
thing I must give you

before we continue to blaze and drink.

- Please be more drugs.

- Yes, I'm also hoping it's more drugs.

- Rizwalda.
- Yes?

- Would you please fill out
this teacher evaluation?

She looks out at all of you and says,

"Whatever you do, keep on your guard.

Starting in senior year,

I expect to see all of
you in rogue classes."

- You got it.
- Without a doubt.

- Honestly, I'm doing one
of everything, I think.

- Absolutely. That's wonderful.

- I have a question, though.

You said that she contacted
a landscaping company

that was near here?

- Yes, correct.

- What was the name of
the landscaping company?

- Loam Landscaping.
- Oh.

- Oh!
- Mm.

- The Loams have lain dead for some time.

Lucy Frostblade, as well.

We are coming up on the
one year anniversary

of Lucy's death, after which point,

the power to bring her back

will be beyond almost all living mortals.

- I'm wondering if we figure
out what plane she's on,

if she's on the Astral Plane or something,

and then we can Plane Shift to there.

- I had an idea.
- I think she's trapped.

- You remember, you think
that Yolanda and Lucy

are with Cassandra, wherever she is.

- Maybe they're not dead. Hollow body?

Okay, you're a ghost, but
your body is interred.

Do you have any connection with the soil?

- Somewhat, yes.

The hallowed soil of the graveyard, yes.

- Have you noticed any seedlings?

Any strange flora beginning,
as the spring beckons?

- No, I can't say that I have.
- Okay.

- I was purposefully interred in Ashgrove

rather than Elmville, so I wanted my body

to be as far away from
students as it could be.

- Yeah, we're pretty far out.
- Okay.

- She looks at all of you and says,

"Incredible. I hope I
have been of some help."

- You have.

- Someone put on a playlist,
and let's get down to it.

- Yes, absolutely.

♪ I said hey, what's up, hello ♪

- Incredible.

Okay, before you leave,

she asks to get the teacher evaluation

back from you so that she can submit it.

- Partying in a graveyard.
That's some good sh*t.

- The instructor's
prepared for each class.

The instructor demonstrates
knowledge of the subject.

The instructor provides material
apart from the textbook.

- Yes.
- For sure, yeah.

Shows respect towards
students and encourages

class participation.
- Yes.

- Encouraged all of you, I suppose.

- In a huge way.
- The instructor maintains

an environment that is
conducive to learning.

- Yes, yes, yes!

- I'm gonna downgrade
from a five to a four.

- Whoa!
- Intimidation! Intimidation!

Intimidation!
- Actually, Murph-



- You actually go ahead and fill that out

while we're doing downtime
for everybody else.

Let's jump into downtime.
- Great.

- [Brennan] Who wants to kick
us off for downtime here?

- So are we leaving for the
Mountains of Chaos soon?

- I think so.

Can you maybe sh**t
out a text and see who-

- Will you please fill out these?

- See if the Rat Grinders
are still around,

or if they've already left.

- Yeah, I'm gonna text some...

Yeah, maybe some freshmen,
some other people.

People who may be some
of the bigger, other...

Maybe text the Ruben fan
group that I'm a part of,

see if anyone knows if
they're still in town at all.

- Do you wanna roll popularity first,

or do you wanna roll Persuasion
as an investigation first?

Is this mystery track or popularity track?

- I mean, I'd prefer it
to be popularity track.

- Cool, so Fabian, we'll roll
popularity first for you.

- Mm, mm, mm.

[die rolling]

That's gonna be 27.

- Fabian, you max out
the popularity track.

Everyone is charmed for
a minute on meeting you,

and you have advantage on any
track check that you want.

- Maybe go figure things out with Gertie.

- Oh, no, not Gertie. Mazey.
- No, I said what I said.

- Both. That's why I need to know

how much time we have before the mountain.

I'm gonna go figure...

That's on the list, Adaine. On the list.

- I think you should, bro.

- Thank you. What are we
calling you, second Kristen?

- Kristen.

- Yes, but that's going to be confusing.

- I kiss you.

- Second Kristen is straight?
- Second Kristen is straight!

- Oh no, Fabian's obsessed
with second Kristen.

- Wow, real Kristen thinks
British people are straight.

- You heard it here first.

- Sorry to disappoint
you. Not a single one.

- [Brennan] Incredible.

- I tackle that Kristen to the ground.

You need to respect my life!

- Okay, as you begin to reach
out and become more popular,

people begin to come and talk to you.

Not only are they like,

"What's gonna happen to lo-fi
study nights over the summer?"

Max Durden is like,

"Cap, are you gonna throw
a f*ck' homecoming?"

- Yes, I think I'm gonna throw homecoming.

I mean, hey, if Kristen's
president, anything's possible.

- Woo! People are psyched.

And then word gets out that
your birthday is the 31st,

which is election day.

It's the Friday that the
student elections are happening,

and everybody immediately is like,

"Is there a campaign thing going on?"

- Fabian, you've got to throw
a party for your birthday.

- Yeah, maybe that Thursday?

- I keep on having visions
of it, and it's important.

- On Thursday?
- Thursday night?

- Which one is it in the vision?

Thursday, Friday? How drunk are we?

- The night of the election.

- Okay, so Friday. So it'll be on the day.

- Okay.

- Can you have a joint election
victory/birthday party?

- Of course, easily.

- Is Kipperlilly still
running for president?

- [Brennan] Yeah, but you notice

that her campaign has dried up.

- I wonder if they have other means

that they're pursuing of getting elected.
- Yeah, the honey

or some other- some kind of vote...

- We've got to be on security detail.

- Yeah, god.
- On a 27, I'll say this, too.

You're hanging out with
Mazey, who, by the way,

she gets your text and is
like, "Let's hang out!"

- I think that's my next track.

I think I'm gonna ask
Mazey on an official date.

- Okay, awesome. Awesome, awesome.

So everyone's talking about
if there's gonna be a party,

if it's gonna be a campaign
event, da da da da da.

By the way, you also do
have those bylaw PDFs.

- Oh, we wanna see what's been changed.

- What's been changed and stuff like that.

Actually, let's roll
the dating thing first.

You did popularity. Let's
roll the relationships thing.

- I'm gonna do this flat.

I'm gonna use my popularity
advantage for something else.

- Okay, go ahead and roll.
Insight or Persuasion.

Actually, we'll say Insight.
It's gonna be Insight.

- Okay, fine. We're gonna use it, then.
- Only a DC 10.

- But I'm bad at Insight.
- Okay.

- That is a 20.

- Wow, okay, 20. Can you roll a d6 for me?

- Yeah.

[die rolling]

That's a three.
- Okay, great.

- Wait, what does that mean?
What do you mean, okay great?

- Okay, great.
- Tippity type type type.

- So if you guys remember,
when I gave the downtime rules,

I'll reveal my hand now, the
secret thing that downtime does

is when you roll those d6s,
rolling a five on the die

removes a stress token, and
rolling a six reduces two.

Rolling a one adds a stress token,

which shows the difference
between your relationship track

and the relaxation track, where actually,

you can get rid of a
bunch of stress tokens

with your relationship track.

But, you know, not always.

Sometimes it's stressful.

So, you and Mazey are hanging out.

Where do you go on your first date?

- I'm gonna buy out Krom's Diner,

and then pay a bunch of Hudol kids

to show up and talk relatively quietly,

but also occasionally
interact with her and myself

in a way that suggests I'm maximum legend,

but I'm gonna wear a scarf that night

and kinda cover up the tattoo

because I know I don't need to
be a maximum legend for her.

- The white knuckle control grip you have

on this date is insane.
- Unbelievable.

- I have $20,000. It's
going to be perfect.

- Because Fig and Fabian,

our family is growing,

I am gonna give him a Bardic

going into this night.
- Unbelievable.

You and Mazey have a
great time at the diner.

You have a shared passion.
Mazey's a very talented dancer.

There's lots to talk about.

I think also, with Mazey,

she is a genuinely calm, kind person.

I think you begin to realize
how interesting her life is,

even though she's a
very soothing presence.

She talks about, "My family,

I go back and visit them sometimes.

They're deep under the Red
Waste in an ancient labyrinth."

- Oh.

- That's actually where Mazey comes from.

- I can't believe I never
asked about that before.

- It's all right. But it's great.

I think there's a lot of
the idea of navigating

complex patterns
intuitively with your body.

I think maybe I dream of
being a choreographer.

I feel like that's where I'm gonna end up,

is choreography.
- You'd be great at it.

- Thanks, Fabian.

She smiles and says, "Hey, I
wanted to bring something up.

I've been really neutral,
but between you and me,

please don't tell anyone I said this,

I kinda think Kristen's
got it in the bag."

- Her and The Ball have
run an unreal campaign.

- Fabian.
- What?

- Come on.
- What?

- Those lo-fi study nights.

You're a huge part of
the campaign's success.

- Hey.
- You and all the Bad-

I feel like you and Fig
and Riz and Kristen,

everyone's been working really hard.

At the beginning of the year,

I wasn't sure if you guys
were gonna take it seriously.

I know Kristen ran into a
buzzsaw, and I was like, is this-

- Yeah, we've come a long way
from the Steelworkers Union.

- I'm going back the first
thing in my downtime.

- Honestly, Kristen
just has so many ideas.

- You're doubling down with them.

- She's constantly thinking of
new things we could be doing

in a really cool way, and
I just think sometimes,

the execution of those ideas
can, I think, feel silly,

but the place is so grounded and real.

- I'm just gonna bring this up,

because I would bring it
up to anybody who asked,

and it's not a secret.

But as long as there's faculty present

or someone from the school
administration present,

you don't have to have polling places

be exclusively at the school

as long as you have them on a Friday,

on that Friday.
- Oh no.

- So, let me get this straight.

You're saying that, like, if I threw...

'Cause you know that's my birthday.

- Happy birthday.

- I mean, you're early.
It's on that election-

- No, I know. I know.

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

- You're saying that if
I had a party that night,

and if there was a faculty member there...

Are you a faculty member?

- No. Well, wait a minute.
I'm acting principal.

You'd have to check the
bylaws. Maybe, yeah.

- If you're there and we have just a box

that people put votes in, we could-

- You have to do it legit.

There has to be a little privacy booth.

People have to be able to go in

and vote and everything like that.

But I'm just saying, the Venn diagram

of people who wanna go
to your birthday party

and the people who wanna
vote in the student body

is not always a perfect circle,

but you can make it pretty
damn near a perfect circle if-

- Could we put a bar?

If I got a Mage Hand situation
bar in the voting booth,

is that allowed?

So if you go in there to get
a drink, you have to vote?

- We should really consult the bylaws.

- Okay, we're talking a lot
of business but, you know.

- You guys have a very cute date.

Do you drop her off at
home on the Hangman?

- Yeah.
- Hell yeah.

- Revving for like 10 minutes.

[Lou and Brennan mimic
the Hangman revving]

- She gives you a kiss
goodnight at the front door,

and it's a very sweet,

uncomplicated date.

- Look at that.
- Look at that.

- What are you doing here, Adaine?

- Gorgug is wrapping
out all the backgrounds.

- Awesome, that's your
relationship. Further downtime.

- I would like to go talk to Gertie.

- Okay, hell yeah.
- Ooh!

- [Brennan] You go talk to-

- I don't know which check that is.

- Yeah, is this mystery?
Or is this relationships?

- Yeah, let's do relationships.

I wanna clear the air with them.

- Okay, give me Persuasion. The DC is-

- You're just trying
to get in on that hive.

- [Brennan] The DC is 15.

- That's not gonna do it.
I'll take a stress token.

- No, you get a 19.

- Okay.
- Okay!

- You're at four. It
would be a rage token.

- Yeah, it would become a rage token.

- God, it was 14.

- Oh wait, in which case,
I'll just give you a seven.

- I'll take the seven.
- Seven. Okay, you take seven.

You come up to address Gertie.

- I think I just wave a little white flag

as I come up toward them.

- Gertie goes, "Ah! My
nemesis approaches!"

- Yes, it's me. I thought we should talk.

- Go for it.
- Okay.

I know that Kristen has...

Is perhaps interested in you.

They've been texting the group
thread a lot of pickup lines

and things that they wish
they could say to you,

but I guess there's
been some friction there

because we're nemeses,

and I was wondering if there's just a way

we could have it out
and be done with this.

I don't know if you wanna
fight me in a field somewhere,

or you just want me to apologize.

Whatever the gambit is
to put this behind us

so that you and Kristen can, I don't know,

do whatever it is you might do together,

let's get into it.

- Right here, right now.

- Great.

- We're just gonna roll a d20.

Add your attack bonus,
and she'll add hers.

- Great.

- Oh, 3 plus 13 is 16.

- 18 plus 12 is 30.

- Shield, sword. Swarming bees around.

You disarm her.

- I reach my hand out.

- She takes your hand.

- All right, we're done?
We're f*cking done?

I'll know if you still
have feelings, all right?

My bank tells me!

A well-dressed man in Bastion City

will tell me if you're lying!

- I rescind my vow of vengeance.

I consider my honor settled,
and this matter resolved.

Fare thee well, Fabian Aramais Seacaster,

and please tell Kristen
to come by anytime.

- All right. She likes tea.

Big fan of tea, and tie-dye.
- Hm!

- If you're looking for any sorta in.

- Well, the interesting thing
about tie-dye, actually,

is that as a practice-
- All right, okay. All right.

- You head on out.

As you are at Aguefort,
you see that Corsica Jones

and Terpsichore Skullcleaver walk up.

Fabian, uh-oh! Uh-oh, congratulations!

- Uh-oh! All right!
- Congratulations!

You see that each of them hands you

a teacher evaluation form.
- Thrilling.

- Oh wow. Power's in your hands.

- Back at the graveyard,

Eugenia's gonna grab
this one, looking at it.

- I did Intimidate him to give all fives.

- You intimidated him to give all fives?

- I rolled high.

- Give me Stealth, give me Perception.

- Nat 20.

- Two becomes a 24.

- Okay, I'm gonna change it all. [gasps]

- There were two fours out of five!

That's not bad. Mostly fives.

- This teacher gave us drugs and alcohol.

- [Brennan] You can fill
those out in your own time.

- Can I make two more rolls?
Would that be possible?

- [Brennan] Yeah, make two more rolls.

- This one, I don't know if
you'll let me do, but I'm gonna-

- She's crossing out
my additional comments.

- Wait, what do your
additional comments say?

- It said, "Good at rogue stuff,

but the double fisting
cigarettes was a bit much,"

and I'm making it,

"Good at rogue stuff and
double fisting cigarettes."

- [Brennan] Incredible.

Okay, what's the roll you
wanna make on your downtime?

- Owlbears.

- Let's do it. Here we go, Athletics.

This is a DC 20. Athletics or Acrobatics.

- I'll do Acrobatics.

[die rolling]

Oh, you're kidding me!

It's an 18.

- 18.

- You do have a Bardic that
you didn't use on your date.

- Okay, great.

- 'Cause of your pregnant mother.

- Stop! Stop!
- It's a family Bardic.

- That's a five. That gets me over.

- All right. 20-what?

- 18 plus 5.

- 23, okay. 23 on Owlbears.

Who wants to jump into downtime next?

- I'll go.
- Adaine, go for it.

- I would love to start
off with a mystery roll,

and what I wanna do is
research the Astral Plane.

- Cool, this is gonna be Arcana.

[die rolling]

- I'm gonna give myself a 19 on that.

- Hell yeah.
- So that's a 29.

- 29!
- Tough start. Tough start.

- Hell yeah.
- Retiring.

- That's a hugely
successful roll, however.

Okay, you're looking
into the Astral Realm.

What kind of Astral Realm
stuff are you looking into?

- Specifically with Arcana,

how magic works there,

how Plane Shifting to there would work,

and all of the sort of dead
god floating around stuff.

- Yeah. I think on that
roll, you look at dead gods.

I think you would, on a 29,

know that there's an exception
for gods that remanifest

in some kind of fey,
fiendish, monstrous form.

You know, the Nightmare King was-

Cassandra was dead but not really,

so there is kind of a fullness of death

to when you go to the Astral Realm.

- Uh-huh.

- But there's something
interesting to you,

'cause you guys remember
after the food court fight

hearing something speak to you

from the death of the Astral.

There was some voice.

Because when it pushed dead Yes! out,

that had come from the Astral,

and then Kristen Banished
it back to the Astral.

- [Siobhan] Sure.

- So there was something there.

The gods that are there
maybe still are possessed

of some intelligence, in the
same way that you guys can die,

but then still have someone
cast Speak with Dead on you,

and suddenly your intelligence comes back.

That magic kind of animates
it. It's stored somewhere.

The cosmos does not forget
these things, right?

And I think also, you find
an interesting little bit

of semantic arcane grammar,

which is about where gods die,

where they go, and where they are borne.

And I think you see something
interesting, which is,

"where they are borne" is
spelled with an E at the end.

- So, like, carried.

- Carried. Where they
are brought to, yeah.

- So I know that Bakur,

when he was trying to bring back Ankarna,

tried to bring her back
at the place of her death.

But maybe it was the
place where she was borne.

- Maybe the Mountains of Chaos?

- Maybe the Mountains of Chaos.

- There's also a lot of
interesting things, I think,

about the Mountains of
Chaos and the history

and everything else
associated with that as well.

When Ankarna was said to
have died in the Red Waste,

what does that mean?

- Maybe I'll do some research into spells

that would help us survive
in the Astral Plane.

- Hell yeah, go ahead and
give me an academics roll,

and I'll say as you're
studying in a wizard class

you no longer need to be at,

Tiberia Runestaff looks at you and says,

"Ahem. Miss Abernant."

- Yes?

- Congratulations.

- Thank you.

- Incredibly prodigious spellcasting,

from what I heard, in the Last Stand.

You see she hands the
teacher evaluation to you.

- Mm, yes.

Mm, mm. Mm-hmm!

- I also wished to say that
I've been communicating

with Arthur Aguefort, who
takes a particular interest-

- How? How have you been
communicating with him?

- In the back, you hear, "Chronomancy!"

and you see she goes-
- Arthur, come back!

- You see she says, "I informed
him of your difficulties

procuring even the most

base requirements for wizarding."

- No, the base...

I mean, ink and feathers
and stuff, I can do.

- I'm talking about sphinx eggs.

- Yeah, no, I am also
talking about sphinx eggs.

- Regardless, his daughter asked him

to pass on a geocache location.

And she hands you a
little set of coordinates.

- Oh!

I will text this to Fig so
we can maybe go together,

'cause I bet there's some
stuff for her in there as well.

- Some stuff for her in
there as well. Hell yeah.

You get a little location from her.

Go ahead and make the academics
roll, if you'd be so kind.

Okay, what was that academics
roll for researching spells?

- It was very bad, so I'm
gonna use my Boggy Help action

to get a much better roll.

That's a 29.

- 29! That's a crushing success.

Go ahead and get a new
spell in your spellbook

of every spell level you can cast.

- Great.

- I've got to play a wizard for
you someday. Please, let me.

- Please, let me! I wanna
add things to my spellbook!

- And then I wanna do a relationship roll.

I kinda wanna have a
little ice cream party

at Mordred Manor.
- Yeah.

- I feel like we've all been so busy,

that it would be really nice

for everybody to sort of have a nice time.

- Give me a relationship check.

- Watch "The Princess Bride".

- [Brennan] DC is 15.
It's an Insight check.

[die rolling]

- 18.

- 18!

There's a f*cking ice cream
party at Adaine's while you guys

are in the middle of hunting
down this big old conspiracy.

With all this extra time,
I think you can tell how-

- Safe?

- Wicked, man.

- There's a moment in the
night where you get a big hug

from Sandra Lynn, who's
got a little party hat on.

She just talks about how nice this is.

- How are you doing?
- She says, "How am I doing?"

- Yeah.
- Doing okay. Work is nuts.

Mountains of Chaos have
been trouble recently.

- Wait, really? What, why, how, what?

- You're a ranger up there?
- Yeah, I'm a ranger up there.

We find abnormal or unnatural creatures

that shouldn't be involved
in Spyre-centric ecosystems

and we move them into more-
- Like invasive species?

- Yeah, invasive species.
So we find, you know,

there's aberrations and
other things like that.

We just move them deeper into
the mountains where they're

not poisoning ecosystems
that are as plant-based.

- So you're talking
about, like, rage stuff?

- It's a weird thing, that you say that.

We're finding a lot of social
animals destroying themselves.

- Wild.

- Wolf packs k*lling members
of their own pack, lots of-

- How long has that been
happening? Is that recent recent?

- That's recent. This is, well, yeah-

- Since spring break recent?

- Yeah, just about.
Last couple weeks, yeah.

- f*ck, we gotta go to
the Mountains of Chaos.

- Can we tell her everything that we know?

- Yeah, you tell her everything you know?

- Yeah.
- Yeah!

- I mean, I think so, maybe leaving out

the Bobby Dawn stuff for Fig to tell her.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Oh yeah, definitely.

- So you have that ice cream party.

Roll me a d6, if you'd be so kind.

[die rolling]

- That's a two.
- Okay. Sandra Lynn says,

"Yeah, I'd be happy to direct you guys.

Do you wanna go to the
Mountains of Chaos?"

- Honestly, if it's cool
with you and everybody else,

since you know the
Mountains of Chaos so well,

would you mind taking us?

Would that be okay?

- Yeah, absolutely. I'm happy to do that.

I can get some other griffins

and we can all take a
flight there if you want.

- Everybody gets a griffin?

- Yeah, if you so
choose. Yeah, absolutely.

- I'll wear my new boots.

- Let me talk to the Ranger's Guild

and make sure that everything's copacetic,

but yeah, it's just a liability thing.

We gotta make sure you kids are-

I know that you're seasoned adventurers.

- We'll sign whatever waiver you need.

- Great. Great, great, great.

She looks at you and just says, "Hey."

- Yeah?
- This was such a sweet idea.

I can't tell you how happy this made,

not only me and Jawbone, so happy-

- I feel like you guys were
just so nice, taking me in,

and we've all been just so busy,

and I just didn't wanna feel
like I was being ungrateful,

'cause I was just being
so busy all the time,

when I am really grateful.

I'm not very good at
being a kid, I feel like.

Like, I don't know how to-

I don't know really know
how to do that, but-

- I'm really sorry.
- Want some more sprinkles?

- Yeah, I'll get some more sprinkles.

I hope you know

that the kindest thing you can do,

I think, for somebody,

is be the person that their kid needed.

And there were a lot of
things I couldn't do for Fig,

I feel like, and I feel like the fact

that she found you, and all you guys-

- But Fig is so great.
- I know she is.

- She's got, like, five jobs.
- What?

- She's so busy.

- What do you mean she has five jobs?

- Well, you know.
- Where is she working?

- Well, you know, I mean,
Hell, and then Kristen's-

- Okay, good, I didn't know

if you meant something other than Hell.

- No, no, no.
- Hell is fine.

- And then she's a rock star.
- Knew that, knew that.

- Security detail.
- Great. Security detail?

- For the president.

- For Joe Biden.
[all laughing]

- She says, "I know that Jawbone,

the most important thing for
him is looking after you,

and it's gonna be hard

to look after someone who's so competent,

who needs, sometimes, very
little looking after."

- But I feel like also, sometimes,

I just know that I can be competent

'cause you guys are there
if I need you to be.

- I know that you moved
in when you were already

a teenager and a high schooler,
but I just want you to know

if there's ever a conversation
that you would have wanted

to have with a mom, I want you to know

that I would love for
you to have that with me.

- Actually, I already
know how periods work.

So, thank you. I run away.
- I know that you know!

It would be insane if
you didn't know that!

As you run away.

- I notice the disparity between
the way she addressed you

and when I talked to her

about my feelings-
- It's much easier-

- ...she took a huge chug of alcohol.

- Oh, look-
- Interesting.

- Listen, It's much easier to
parent somebody else's child.

- It's like looking in a
little mirror, probably.

- Sandra Lynn!

- Somebody that you don't
see yourself in so clearly.

- Any other downtime things you're doing?

- I feel like that's everything,

unless anybody else has any ideas.

- I grabbed these during
a little bio break,

but you hand in your Tiberia
Runestaff evaluation.

I just wanted to read the
additional comments on it.

The additional comments.

"The material expenditure
for wizard classes is,

IMO, unrealistic for
students to self-provide."

Tiberia says, "I'll be taking this and,

of course, not reading it.

It will go to the principal's office,

where your co-student Mazey Phaedra

will, I suppose, read it,"

and she heads off with it.
- Wow.

- But you have that little geocache.

- Oh, I guess I'll check
in with Fig and say,

hey, you wanna get this from Ayda?

- Sure.
- Yeah, great.

- You check in with Fig
about running to go get that,

and as you do, Fig,
you see out in the quad

on one of the exterior cafeteria tables,

you see Porter walking up with an arm

around a shaking, frazzled
and weeping Lucilla Lullaby.

- Oh f*ck.
- Who walks up and is like,

"Listen, it's all right,
you know? She's not gonna-"

- I gave you all fives!

- Lucilla goes, "That's so nice.

I guess the one class I taught

must've really made an impression."

- I specifically said that.

I said the one class I went
to was actually pretty chill.

- This woman has a weirdly
parasocial relationship with you.

[indistinct]

- She fully breaks the
rules and looks at this.

She grabs the sheet from
Porter and he goes, "Hey!"

And you see she goes, "Name of instructor.

Attractive bard teacher,
I can't remember her name.

It's alliterative!

It's Lucilla Lullaby!

The last name's a type of
song! I'm the bard teacher!"

- But there's an apology in it, too.

I literally apologized
to you in the notes.

And I gave you all fives! All fives!

- You see that she goes,
"Thank you so much,"

and you see Porter looks
over and says, "I notice...

I didn't read any of the comments.

I notice that I have a
split one with Zara."

- Yeah.

- So the teacher whose only
one class you attended-

- I get the impression that
you guys like to share.

- I hope that's not in
the additional comments.

- I cast Detect Thoughts on Porter.

- He sees you casting that

and does his Mindless
Rage feature to repel it.

He's like, "No! Not those thoughts!"

You see he looks and says,

"By the way, Zara wanted
to meet with you tonight."

- Oh, I think I already passed class.

- I understand, but she
wanted to say thank you

for the letter you wrote her.

- Oh, okay.

The letter I wrote her was
just asking for an extension.

She doesn't have to-

- She told me that you had
attached, in the envelope,

a flayed flap of human skin
with golden writing on it.

- Yeah.

- I think she wanted to just touch base.

- Oh, okay. Yeah.
- Touch base, that's all.

- Yeah, I can do that.

- By the way, just for
posterity, additional comments.

"Zara kept me engaged,

and not just because she's a hot goth.

After all these years,
still not sure if Porter

is secretly evil, but smiting is so sick."

Incredible.
- All fives as well.

- It does look like Porter,
for how chill he has been

this year, you see some rage
bubbling up as he's like,

"I mean, if you had two sheets of paper,

wouldn't you do the two teachers...

I mean, I just, you took classes!"

- I know, but I really owed
the attractive bard teacher.

- Actually, you know what? That's fair.

- Yeah.
- That's really fair.

I understand that.
- I really did.

- You head out from there.

We grab the rest of these, I
think, evaluations as well.

Fabian's for Corsica Jones is,
"Yeah yeah, stabby stabby."

- That's all we do.
- All we do.

Additional comments for Terpsichore,

"Strongly disagree that
teacher prepared for class,

but this is the way of dance.

Dance is present. Dance is now.

One cannot prepare, and by
preparing, you've already failed.

Also, again, I'm so sorry.

Please let me buy you a new shirt."

- I really hope-
- What?

- You know! You know I sh*t on her!

- Wait, what happened?

- Stop! Everyone stop pretending
like they didn't know.

You guys were asking me
all that fluid stuff.

You said fluid. You all said fluid.

- This is the first I've heard of it.

- I said movement!
- Yes, that also counts!

- I really didn't mean anything

when I said the shart of dance.

- I am the Ora-Cool, all right?

- I mean, there definitely
seems to have been an aura.

- All right, we're moving on. Next topic.

- It was definitely not
cool. It was really warm.

- Gorgug, comments for
Professor Hopclap were,

"Mr. Hopclap helped me go
from a self-trained hobbyist

to a proficient adept
artificer," and then for Porter-

- Real all business.
- All business.

"At first, I didn't wanna
give Porter all fives,

but I ultimately believe
his nontraditional approach

pushed me to become the
best barbarian I could be."

- Nice.
- Let me get out of the Uber.

- [Brennan] Let me get
out of the Uber here.

- Thank you so much. Five stars.

- Bobby Dawn, comments
from Kristen Applebees.

"Extremely biased.

Inappropriate use of
class time for preaching.

Liar, frumpy, wrong."

- Liar, frumpy, wrong.
- Liar, frumpy, wrong.

From the law firm of
Liar, Frumpy and Wrong.

Incredible. So, we're still
doing this final downtime track.

Anyone else wanna go to downtime?

Adaine, do you wanna wrap yours up?

Do any other people
wanna jump on downtime?

- Jace. I would love to...

Actually, maybe I'll Scry on Jace.

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

- [Brennan] Hell yeah. Go for it.

- It's actually him rolling.

- Oh yes, it is. Hold on.

- Wisdom.

- You feel him succeed on the Wisdom.

- He fails. He gets a one.
- Whoop!

Jace, you can see,

is in his office here at school.

- Just quietly sitting?

- It looks like he's working on something.

- Can I zoom in, see what he's working on?

- Enhance.
- [Brennan] Yes, you can.

- Enhance, enhance!
There's always a back door!

I'm just ethereally
"Mission Impossible"-ing

into his office.

- You see him writing, and
he's looking up podcasts.

You see him Googling...

First of all, you see that he's subscribed

to "Complicated Women."

- Which, canonically, I've
been doing it on the side

under Disguise Self.
- I will also say-

- Another one of Fig's jobs.

- I will also say,

give me a Luck check to
see- you wanna roll high-

to see what he's got
open as he's doing stuff.

[die rolling]

- I did not roll high. I got a five.

- Okay, so you don't
see what he's working on

on his computer.
- Is he buttoned up to here?

- Give me a Perception check.

[die rolling]

- 17.

- As he's in this small office,

you see that he's sweating a little bit.

It's very toasty in this office.

Hot, getting into later spring.

He gets up, takes his scarf
off, hangs it by the door,

and just for a moment, as
he turns in the mirror,

you see a deep, ragged scar on his chest.

You see he looks at the
scar, looks in the mirror.

His eyes flash red for a second.

And that's all for this
episode of "Dimension 20".

- Ooh!
- Wow.

He buried that in that tone.

- Cloud Rider!
- You know much about those?

- Ah, do I ever!

Certain arcano-tech
engines are constructed

in order that they
might be able to join us

in a real man's ocean, the sky!

- I wouldn't say that around Fabian.

- I've got a three-day fried rice,

and then I found some that
had been out in the sun.

- Thank you. [munching enthusiastically]

Now, I don't care how
long we have to look.

We're gonna find this boy,
and I need everyone here

working double overtime until we do!

Hello, Ms. Applebees.

- You can't find him?

- We know that he died.

But now we can't locate his
soul in the blessed afterlife.

- That's because he chose a new deity.

- The room goes silent.

Why can you not burn?

- Because my girlfriend is a phoenix,

and sexually, it would be a complication.

- I am, for the first time in ages,

thrown for a loop.

- Are they really out there
just k*lling rats for fun?

Or are the rats part of, like,

they're drinking the water,

they're eating the f*cked up ground.

Are they literally grinding up rats?

- One second.
[soothing panpipe music]

- A bunch of little rats run in. Hi!

- Can I ask you a question
about the rat city?

- Mm-hmm. Rat World?
- Yes, Rat World.

- With the mall?
- Yeah.

- What do you use for rat money?

- Rat dollars. Bye bye!
[players shouting]

- Rat dollars? Are you kidding me?

♪ T-T-T-Taking over, teenage rebellion ♪

♪ No more fantasizing about it ♪

♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪

♪ Hey, let's go ♪