[Man] Christmas 2010 at
the Stools. Look at that tree!
Are we ready? Should we see
Santa's special present?
[Dad] Alright.
[Family gasps]
[Puppy snuffles]
Our first Christmas with Nugget!
- Look at that!
- Nugget.
Keep still, Stephy.
- Here we are.
- Don't want you getting burnt.
[Joyful music]
[Woman] Oh, you missed it, Ryan!
[Dad] Stephy, look at
the camera! Stephanie!
Show me, Nugget. There he is.
- [Mum] Good boy! Good boy.
- There he is.
Tra-la-la-la-la, la-la-la
You! We wanna look at you,
beautiful lady.
...little one back here,
I don't know where it is...
Stand like this.
And then you go here.
[Barks]
Hand?
Ohh!
Ready?
[All cheer]
Go, Nan! Go, Nan! Go, Nan!
[All chatter]
Oh, Nugget!
[Snores]
[Nugget grumbles]
[Woman shouts] John, will you
turn the carols down?
[John] Jodie, can you keep the
noise down? I'm trying to...
Nuggie! Stephy's coming home
and bringing Seb.
[Gasps] What have you got there?
What have you d...
Oh... Oh!
Ryan! Look what Nugget's done
to your dad's Santa undies!
They better not be the ones
Stephy brought me from the city!
They're my favourite undies!
I wear 'em every bloody
Christmas!
- Don't yell at me, John!
- I wasn't yelling, Jodie.
[Jodie] I cannot hear
a word you're saying.
Oh, bloody hell!
Come in here if you want
a conversation.
Mum, when is Steph getting here?
You already know
how I feel about my family.
Yes, they trigger you,
they re-open childhood wounds.
And over Christmas,
when nothing is open...
Christmas is a very
difficult time, sensorily.
Exactly. But... that's not gonna
happen this year.
Because of our progress.
Because I've decided to spend
Christmas without them.
I'm gonna spend it with
my boyfriend and his family.
OK. Well, that's different
from... what we had.
I'm setting a boundary, Dr. Jay.
- Over Christmas?
- Mm-hm.
- This is a big step, Steph.
- Thank you.
How did your family
receive this information?
Steph, we've spoken about this!
No, I know. And I do
plan on telling them.
I firmly suggest
that you tell them
as soon as this session is over.
Totally, and I will
definitely... do that.
[Door opens]
[Man] Hey, babe,
I'm just upstairs.
[Door closes]
[Soft music plays]
Look at my little baker!
Oh, my God, babe!
That looks amazing!
How'd it go, babe?
Uh... good. Uh, terrible.
I've got a really hard convo
ahead of me with the fam, so...
Well, you told them we're
not coming, though, right?
Oh! No, of course.
They know we're not, um, coming.
Dr. Jay just told me I need to
reaffirm my boundaries
with them over the break.
True.
Hey, um... I'm really proud of
you for doing that.
Thanks, babe.
It's our first Chrissy together!
Oh, careful with all that spelt
flour near that gorgeous jacket!
Josephine, I had no idea
you were coming!
- It's so good to see you!
- [Both chuckle]
Let me feel the fabric.
Oh, I think it's, um,
some kind of blend.
It is. You can tell by the way
the fabric falls. Just gorgeous!
Now, sorry for intruding, darling.
Sebastian just wanted me
to sample his focaccia
ahead of the warm-up lunch
tomorrow.
Oh, and thank you so much
for inviting me.
I'm so excited for Christmas
and the warm-up lunch -
I am so ready to meet
everyone in the family!
[Chuckles]
[Josephine] Now,
I just have to ask.
How is your...
...frenetic family going?
Sebastian was just telling me
they're driving you up the wall.
Oh, yep, they can be
a bit intense.
[Ryan] Mum, Nug won't have
his December 22nd.
- Check his arsehole.
- What?
What did you say?
Dogs get a white arsehole
when they're sick.
No, they don't. It's inside of
the ears you're meant to check.
Yeah, where'd you pull
'arsehole' from, John?
Check your own arsehole.
Oh, that's classy, Jodie.
Your parents aren't together,
are they?
No. So they're separated
but still living together,
which is super healthy!
Oh, Mum, you'll love this.
Steph's cousin is in one of
those MLM Ponzi schemes
selling stick-on eyelashes.
[Steph] I mean,
it's unconfirmed,
but all the evidence is
definitely pointing that way.
[Squeals] Oh!
Absolutely beautiful, darlin'!
You look like Bette Davis.
Smoking, Mama. You look smoking.
I'm serious. Smoke show.
Steph's boyfriend's
gonna love it.
I absolutely love them, darl.
- You know what's amazing, guys?
- What?
How still your hand is, baby.
Like, look how tiny
this glue is.
- It's not that tiny.
- No, Hassan's right, Shayla.
The glue's tiny!
She's a talent, your fiance!
We've done alright for
yourselves, haven't we?
Stop it, Dad! Stop it, Dad!
[Laughs] What incredibly rich
material!
Oh, but they must just think
the world of you!
The first doctor in the family.
Oh, well, you know what?
They don't even really
understand dermatology
as, like, a medical field.
They think I'm, like,
a wrinkle k*ller or something.
It's insane, Mum. They have
no idea how hard she works.
Well, I am very proud of you.
- [Sebastian] Yeah.
- We both are.
Mm-hm.
And we cannot wait
to have you for Christmas.
And you'll get to meet my
father, Sebastian's Grum Grum.
It's my nickname for him
when I was younger.
[Laughs] It just totally stuck,
didn't it?
It did! [Laughs] It did.
Oh! He's aged now, of course.
But he was really
ahead of his time.
One of the first men in the army
to be friends with a g*y man.
[Sebastian] Mmm.
Wow! Well, I...I cannot wait
to meet Grum Grum.
He sounds, um, amazing.
- [Phone buzzes]
- Oh, sorry.
Oh, it's my mum.
I can grab that later.
Why don't you get
off your phone?
Excuse me, I'm calling
our daughter!
Remember her?
Make sure you ask her to get me
another pair of Santa pants!
I was gonna bloody wear 'em
Christmas Day.
[Josephine] And Seb tells me
your extended family
are very close by?
Yeah, my aunt and uncle live
right across the road.
So it's... a bunch of fun!
[Laughs] Classic!
So I got some home brew
for Johnny.
[Woman] Oh, we love that.
[Man] What's the name of
the boyfriend?
[Shayla] Sebastian, Dad.
[Hassan] I feel like
he's gonna be a good guy
and hopefully we can be friends.
[Dad] Don't think I've
ever met a Sebastian.
[Shayla] Of course
you're gonna be friends.
Whoo-hoo! Hello!
When will we see Stephy?
Now, Stephanie, I have
to give you a heads-up
on some of our
Christmas traditions.
Yes.
Warm-up lunch tomorrow,
then c*ck on the terrace.
Oh, it's nothing too flash,
but it is quite nice
at twilight. [Chuckles]
Then the next day is our
Christmas Eve soire
where we get everyone
around the piano.
- [Phone buzzes]
- Uh...
Um...
You know what?
It's my mum again.
I might just have to grab this.
She wouldn't usually call twice.
Wouldn't she?
I mean, I'll just be,
um, two seconds.
[Phone continues buzzing]
You've got some flour on me.
- [Whispers] Oh, sorry.
- Have you...
- Is there some on there?
- Yes.
Darling, go and get...
Go and get a cloth.
[Phone buzzes]
- Mum, what is it?
- [Jodie] Oh, Steph.
Nugget is dead.
- What?
- [Family gasps]
- Oh!
- Well, not dead, but not good.
Maybe he's having a mid-life.
Just needs a sports car.
[Jodie] Oh, Steph,
he's not doing well.
I knew it. I knew
this would happen.
Shay, do your sexy dance.
[Shayla] Oh, OK.
Nug, look at me!
- Look at what Shay-Shay's got!
- [Hassan] I think it's working.
- Keep going, babe!
- [Shayla] Come on, Nuggy!
I told your father he wasn't
doing well last week.
But nobody listened to me,
as usual.
He didn't eat his treat
this morning.
Normally he goes bananas
for Shay!
He humps me too, Ros.
He humps me too!
Mum, what is going on?
What are you talking about?
Ryan, check his eyes. How are
the whites of his eyes looking?
- They're... white.
- [John] They're white!
[Jodie] Steph,
we're taking him to the vet.
Mum, slow down.
What is actually wrong with him?
[Jodie] He collapsed.
[Ryan]
He didn't look good, Stephy.
- [John] He collapsed.
- Collapsed how?
He was up and then
he laid down suddenly!
John, just pick up Stephanie
when you pick up your mother.
Mum, OK. Can you put Dad
on the phone, please?
Fine. I'll do this myself.
Nobody worry about me.
Hello?
- Dad, what is going on?
- Well...
Oh, and make sure you bring
Stephanie straight to the vet.
Uh, your mother wants me to come
and bring you
straight to the vet.
Are you serious?
He's not being himself, Steph.
And, uh, there's no point
taking any chances.
Look, I'm leaving now
to pick up your nan,
so, uh, I'll be over
in about 70.
Oh, and make sure you bring Seb!
[John] Who's Seb?
[Jodie] The boyfriend, John!
Wake up and pay attention
to your daughter's life,
for God's sake!
- [John] Fine! I'm leaving now.
- Dad? Dad?
70 minutes, Steph.
Just be ready.
OK, 'bye, darling.
[Line beeps]
I'm sorry, my mum just...
Apparently my dog,
Nugget, is sick.
- Babe, what?
- Oh, dear! That's just awful.
- I'm so sorry.
- Yeah.
Um, he kinda means everything
to me and it sounds bad,
so I think my dad's gonna
come get me so I...
[Chuckles sadly]
...so I can say goodbye.
- [Sebastian] Really?
- [Josephine] Goodness!
Like, right now?
Yeah, um...
I think I have to go pack.
Pack, darling?
Oh! No, I'll be back for
the warm-up lunch, obviously.
- I'll be back.
- Oh!
Oh, well, that's good, darling.
Oh, well, look, give my deepest
love to your family.
- Yeah.
- Mmm!
[Kookaburras laugh]
[Whines]
[Woman] Oh, good boy, Biscuit.
[Laughs] Come on, sweetie.
Jodie? Ros?
What are you and Nugget
doing here?
- Hi, Tammy. Hello, Biscuit.
- [Biscuit whines]
[Jodie] Is Biscuit sick?
Oh, no! [Chuckles nervously]
Just here for a quick nail clip
and a bit of a check-up
before Chrissy.
11 years old,
he's never been healthier!
Anyway, off to
the groomer's now.
[Chuckles nervously] Alright!
Oh! Is Nugget alright?
Looks a bit off.
[Ros] He'll be alright.
- 'Bye!
- 'Bye, Tammy. 'Bye, Biscuit.
There's not much happening
up there, is there, Jodes?
Oh, at least she's got Biscuit.
Oh! Jodes, you're quick!
[Sebastian] All good, babe?
You want me to come see you off?
Oh! No, don't bother.
OK. Well, I hope
everything goes OK.
You're gonna make it
back in time, yeah?
It's just Mum told everyone
you're coming and...
...I think that... I think
they're all excited
I'm actually serious
about someone.
Of course I'll be back in time.
I'll just go, make sure Nugget's
OK, come straight back
and then we can head over to
your Christmas together.
[Sebastian] OK.
Uh, you might
have to meet me there.
I told Mum I'd head over early,
so I won't be here
when you get back.
Oh! No worries.
That makes sense. Totally.
I 'ruv' you!
I 'ruv' you too!
[Josephine]
Sebby darling? Smells delicious!
[Whispers] Should
get back to Mum.
[Soft music plays]
[Car door opens]
[John] Ridiculous streets!
Haven't been updated
since motorised vehicles
were invented!
- Hello, darling.
- Hi, Dad!
Come on.
Hi, Nan!
Shayla? What happened to you?
Oh, I'm Steph, Nan.
Your other granddaughter.
[John] OK!
- I'll give you this.
- Right.
That gonna be enough stuff
for the whole week?
Yep, everything's in there.
Right, so I guess we're
getting vouchers, then!
I thought she looked sick!
You look very pale.
Uh, I wear a lot of
sunscreen, Nan. SPF.
I take care of my skin.
She's a pimple popper, Mum.
Oh, it's a disgusting habit!
Never pick at your skin.
I'm actually training to be
a dermatologist, Nan.
- That's a doctor.
- [Nan] Oh!
[John] OK, well,
where's the boyfriend?
Oh, he sends his love.
He's still working.
I thought he was
coming down with us.
I heard he couldn't drive.
[Nan laughs] Can't drive?
[Laughs] How old is he?
- Can we just go, please?
- No, Steph...
Your mother thinks
he's coming down now.
You know she doesn't like it
when plans change.
OK, well,
he's coming tomorrow.
And to be honest, this whole
thing is a plan change, Dad.
And an overreaction.
Nugget's probably fine.
[Nan] John, can we just go?
I don't trust the people
around here.
- Belts on, please.
- Yeah, they're on.
- [Nan slurps]
- [Seatbelt continues clicking]
Just relax!
I'm relaxed, Stephanie.
- What's he do for work?
- [Jodie] Seb? I don't know.
Do we have Nugget out here?
[Ros and Jodie] Yeah!
Ohh! Hello!
[Jodie] This is
our little Nugget.
What a beautiful dog!
You're an angel!
He's extremely smart too.
Yeah? He's got
such a human face.
[Ros] He really does!
Lovely to meet you, Nugget.
Why don't we get you inside?
[Ros] So you're new! What brings
you to our neck of the woods?
[Vet] I followed a girl here,
if you can believe it.
How's work?
Yep, pretty... full-on.
Yeah? What are they
paying you now?
Like, weekly.
What are you bringing in?
Dad, it's...
No, well, I just gave
Hassan a pay rise.
1.6k before tax. That's weekly.
That's... Yeah, that's
a lot of money, Dad.
Yeah, well, that's the kind of
money you make in my business.
Now, just think what you'll make
when you're the boss.
- [Nan mutters]
- Sure. Yep.
- More money.
- [John] Mm-hm.
Well, less, actually.
You're less liquid.
But you have flexibility -
that's the payoff.
Right, so it's worth it, then.
Well, no, not really.
Not all the time.
You know, you got
all the responsibility.
GST and...
[Nan tuts and inhales sharply]
[Nan inhales sharply]
Nugget ate my Santa underpants
that you gave me, by the way.
[Nan cackles] I won!
Yeah, g...
Oh, here we are.
- Nan, do you want my hand?
- [Nan] Yes.
[Seagulls squawk]
So why don't we give you to Dad?
And I'm gonna run in, OK?
I'm gonna run in.
- [John] OK, come on, Mum.
- [Nan] What am I doing here?
So the big move and... what next?
Wedding bells?
Or a more non-traditional
union, Ros.
None of the above, sadly.
We broke up a few months ago.
- Oh, no! That's a shame.
- Hmm.
Two women. Can be difficult.
Well, I mean...
Our Steph, my daughter,
she's bisexual,
which is strange,
because she's very uptight.
Sorry, why are we sharing this
with the vet?
[Jodie and Ros yelp]
Steph! Good to see you too!
[Ros and Jodie laugh]
- [Ros] All had context, Steph.
- Hey, baby. Are you OK?
You OK, bubba?
We were talking about
your bisexuality
because Dr. Lander shared
her own sexuality,
which is... a l*sbian.
- [Jodie] That's right.
- [Ros] Oh, hang on.
Did I just make
an offensive assumption?
- Oh, my God. I am so sorry.
- It's totally fine.
It did have context
and I am a l*sbian.
- [Ros] Oh, good!
- [Jodie] There you go!
And good on you, darling.
Oh, thank you.
OK, can I just get
an update on Nugget, please?
Since your, like,
hysterical phone call
derailed my afternoon
and my entire life, Mum.
There's no need to be dramatic,
Steph! [Laughs]
I can give you a quick rundown.
Essentially, we ran some tests
and I recommended
you all monitor him
for the next 24 hours,
especially his eating.
After that, come back here,
we'll redo those tests again
and see where we're at.
OK. Uh, yes, great.
I'll just write that down.
[Jodie] Oh, Steph, there's
no need to write it down!
Anything else
I can help you with?
Uh, no, that was great
and full of information,
Dr. Lander.
Totally fine, Steph.
[Jodie] Alright.
We will get monitoring
this little bub.
Come, bubba. Let's go now.
Steph's a doctor-in-training
in the city.
Oh!
[Ros] We'd really love
for Steph to live down here
like my Shay does with us,
but she won't, will she, Jodes?
- Yes, we know.
- Because of the boyfriend.
[Jodie] Yeah, where is he?
Is he in the car?
No, he's coming tomorrow, Mum.
I think we should go.
- Let's go. Let's go, Mum.
- Wait.
[Jodie] Alright,
we'll get out of your hair.
But we'll keep you updated
about Nugget.
[Dr. Lander] Please do.
- Oh, and the boyfriend!
- Oh!
- [Dr. Lander] Oh!
- [Jodie laughs]
- [Chuckles] Thank you.
- I'm so sorry.
[Dr. Lander laughs]
You're good. Bye-bye!
[Door closes]
[Car horn toots]
[Yells] Oh, they're
back from the vet!
[Nan] Oh, Hassan!
- Nan!
- [Nan] There you are!
Oh, dear!
Oh, look at that outfit!
You look like a boss!
[Nan laughs]
OK, Dad, we've got 21 hours
and then back to the vet, right?
Hey? What's the rush, Steph?
Jeez! Just got here.
What, some urbanite got a giant
pimple that you need to pop?
Is that all you brought
for five days?
A handbag and a tuxedo?
[John] Yeah, that's what I said.
Well, I was thinking
I could wear
some of my old Christmas stuff
from, like, the attic.
Oh, great, another job for me -
I get to dig through the attic
for an outfit for Steph.
You're staying till Boxing Day,
aren't you?
- Uh...
- John, stepladder for the attic.
Uh... right. Stepladder for
the attic. Stepladder, attic.
Stepladder for attic.
[Jodie] Oh, it's so cluttered
in here!
Steph, you're gonna have to
take some of your things
back to the city!
[Hassan] Oh! Hey, cuzzy!
So sorry! I forgot
to give you a hug.
Hey, Hassan.
Shay's just stuffing
the chicken.
[Steph]
Oh, thank you for that update.
We're so excited to see you.
Especially Shay -
for a few reasons, actually.
Um, she wants to ask
you something.
You know what?
I just arrived, Hassan.
Can I just go sort my things
out, if that's OK?
- Yeah, that's great.
- [Yells] Shay! Cuzzy's here!
This is all I could find
of your old things.
I didn't have time to put fresh
bed linen, so you'll have to.
That's OK.
I can put it in my room.
You're not staying
in your old room!
I had your father bring
the caravan home for you and Seb
'cause I know how much
you like your own space.
What time's he coming tomorrow?
When are we gonna do
the rum ba*ls?
- Hey!
- Mum, the rum ba*ls... Oh! Hey!
Hey, here's the wart wizard!
Mwah! Where's the boyfriend?
We're actually just taking some
stuff down to the caravan.
Let me help! I'll get the door.
[Jodie] Thank you, Beef.
Seb's coming tomorrow. He was
always gonna come tomorrow.
I'm just here earlier
than we planned now.
Oh, sorry your dog got sick.
[Ros shrieks] Look who's here!
I've just got chicken
on my fingers.
I'll go wash it off. I'll
come give you a hug, OK?
- Hey, Jodes, let me help.
- It's alright, Beef.
You were very helpful.
You got the door.
Listen, I was thinking
we should take Seb
up the club tomorrow
for the meat raffle.
That's a fantastic idea! He'll
have his socks knocked off.
I guarantee they aren't
as generous
with the meat in the city.
All about those smaller
portions, aren't they?
- [Jodie] That's right.
- Oh, here, Jodes.
[Jodie] Thank you, Beef.
He can't drive, can he?
- What?
- The boyfriend.
How's he gonna get here
if he can't drive?
That's true - if he's on the
train, he's gonna need a pickup.
- [Phone chimes]
- What is it, Mum?
Oh, nothing, Stephanie.
Listen, I've gotta go.
I've got a million things to do.
Now, regarding boyfriend pickup,
I'd be happy to do it, Stephy.
I just need to know
when, where and how.
He's, um...
Excited to see
your cuzzy, Steph?
I know Shayla's been
dying to catch up.
Among other things. [Chuckles]
I'm just so proud of
my little girl, you know?
You know, her own 'she-E-O'.
Between you and me,
I wasn't all the way across
the whole eyelash business,
but the way Shay does 'em!
Um, move, Dad! I need
cuzzy hugs right now!
[Squeals] Oh, Stephy!
I missed you so much, boo!
Excuse me! Where's my hug?
- Oh, Mum!
- [Squeals]
You're deprived of 'em at home,
are ya, love?
I am deprived of
auntie hugs, Beef!
[Beef] Room for one more?
Come on! Yeah, come on!
[Shayla] Oh, my God!
[Beef] It's lovely
to be together again!
[Jodie]
Nugget's gonna be OK, Ryan.
Yeah. Yeah, yeah. 100%.
- [Phone chimes]
- Oh.
[Chuckles] Ooh!
Uh... [Chuckles]
How are you going with the...
It's fine. It's fine, yeah.
People are very, um...
[Chuckles]
[Clears throat] Anyway.
Um, thank you for helping me.
But let's just keep that
between us, OK?
I don't need Steph
blowing up at me.
Yeah. No, I get that.
That's, um... It's fine, Mum.
It's hard.
Steph's hard.
I won't say anything to her.
[Beef]
I just don't wanna let go!
It is getting... It's hot.
It's a bit hot in here.
Excuse me, missy,
we need some girls time!
Take a hint, Beef!
Message received.
Blokes time anyway.
I'll drop in on Johnny.
Um, and, hey, Mum,
I've got a friend
who doesn't really
do much over
the Christmas period.
Just religious and cultural
kinda differences.
I was wondering if maybe
they could stay over Christmas.
Um...
...that sounds really nice.
[Ryan] Yeah.
- I'll, um...
- [Nugget groans softly]
I'll organise a place mat.
OK, great! [Laughs]
[Chuckles] Alright!
You have to let me
do your lashes.
Oh, that's, um,
really not my thing.
I'm not into wearing them
or, like, selling them onwards.
Honey... what?
Lashes are everyone's thing, babe.
Jodes has lashes,
your Nan has lashes.
Yes, even Ryan tried lashes. You
know what he's like - quirky.
He doesn't care what's normal.
Let's get them done
before dinner, yeah?
- [Gasps] Before boyfie arrives!
- [Ros squeaks]
- [Steph chuckles]
- [Ros] Hooray!
Babe, I am that excited
to meet Sebastian.
Now, does he like 'Sebastian'
or does he like 'Seb'
or does he like something
altogether, like, different?
How in the world has he managed
to avoid us this long?
[Shayla] I'm just gonna whip
those off you right now.
- Thanks, I...
- No.
You want eyebrows done as well?
I've done my
wax and tint certificate.
I've got an eyebrow person
in Sydney, so all good.
- Really?
- [Shayla] Do you?
Are they legit, babe?
'Cause my stuff's legit.
I get all my gear from
this amazing company.
They're more like a family.
This is just starting
to sting a little bit.
[Shayla] What?!
Lash virgin things!
- OK.
- Yeah, we're ready. OK.
[Ros] Open-up time, darl.
You look that hot.
Seriously, you look so much
more put-together now.
- Yeah...
- Don't touch them, girlfriend!
- You have to let them dry out.
- Do not touch. Yeah.
How long do they, um...
they last?
Oh, don't stress, babe. Mine
last for, like, up to six weeks.
Longer with infills. It's a lot
longer than Bianca's, isn't it?
That's Beauty by Bianca.
A lot of her old clients
now get lashes by Shayla.
It's because of
my people skills.
I've got a client-first attitude
and I'm not afraid to get deep.
[Chuckles] Well, thank you.
- I'd better go.
- So, um, Stephy...
I've been meaning to talk to you
about something.
Um, it's not ideal timing
with everything that's
going on with Nugget,
but I just, um...
Something more to do with
what's going on with me.
I wanted to ask you something...
I just remembered
that I have to call Seb
to give him directions
how to get here.
- So I'm gonna go...
- Oh, talk to Seb.
We don't want him...
Don't want him getting lost.
[Shayla] Yeah, no.
- You look gorge!
- Yes, thank you.
Different person.
- So close.
- Next time, darling. Next time.
[Phone line rings]
[Seb] Hey, babe.
Yep, so MLM recruitment
pretty much confirmed.
Oh, and Nugget is fine,
as expected.
Yeah, I told you!
Just waiting on confirmation
from the vet tomorrow
and then I can make
my escape to yours.
Yeah, awesome.
That's perfect, babe.
Mum's putting on negronis
at 12:00.
Oh, yeah, that should
totally, um, work.
The vet's close to the station.
It'll take me two hours
to get there.
And then I was thinking of
telling everyone
that you've had a family
emergency with Grum Grum
and you need me there
for moral support.
But they know you're not
staying, right?
No, that's in case they
lay on the guilt, as usual.
That's so funny!
Of course my cousin
gets a mullet in Budapest.
Oh, classic!
[Chuckles] That is funny.
Alright, I gotta go, babe.
No, I won't keep you, babe.
I'll see you tomorrow, then.
I love you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'll talk to you soon.
Grum Grum, you old dog!
[Line beeps]
[Jodie] Where's John gone off
to? Is he back in the shed?
Nice to see Nan-Nan, hey? Hey?
Hey, little bro.
Hey, Stephy.
It's nice to have you home.
Yeah, it's great to be home.
Such a relaxing
and restorative time.
Yeah, OK, everyone's
a little stressed, for sure.
But your, um...
Hey, your lashes look good.
Oh, yeah. You reckon
they're the new me?
Yeah! Yeah, for real, yeah.
You and Shay look like twins.
[Laughs]
Oh, how's he going?
- How's bubba?
- He's good.
He looks better
since you got here.
Isn't that right, Nuggy?
Dig in, everyone!
John, did you hear that?
Get out of the shed!
- Come and join us!
- [John] Yes, I heard, Jodie.
- I'm here.
- [Ros] Look at this!
Oh, a moment in time!
It's important to capture
things like this!
[Jodie] Our babies!
- Nuggy?
- Nuggy!
[Beef] Yeah, that's beautiful.
OK, now everyone in.
No, go on, everyone get in.
Johnny, in you go.
- Come on!
- Turn around, look at Beef, Mum.
[Beef] Just sit back and...
Yeah, that's it.
- Everyone get in.
- Come in here with me!
Everyone in? Everyone in.
That's lovely.
And say "Christmas"!
[All] Christmas!
- Beautiful!
- We need one with you.
No, no. Come on, everyone.
Let's eat. Let's eat. Chook?
- [Crickets chirp]
- [Sniffles]
[Groans]
[Sniffles]
[Camera clicks]
[Phone beeps]
[Phone chimes]
[Bed creaks]
[Birds squawk and warble]
[Scratching at door]
[Nugget barks]
- Hey, little Nug!
- [Nugget sneezes]
Look at your little outfit!
- See, I knew you were fine!
- [Nugget whines]
You're feeling so much better,
aren't you?
Why don't we go
straight to the vet
so everyone can relax
and Stephy can have lunch
with a w*r hero?
What do you think, bubba?
Should we go?
Should we go, bubba?
Let's go, baby.
Come, bubba! Let's get
your little collar on.
OK, team, let's get right
to the vet bright and early.
Into the cars we go.
- Holy hell!
- [Plate clatters]
Oh, my God, no!
- What? What's wrong?
- [Nan] Who is that?
It's me, Nan. It's Steph.
Oh, darling, we need
to get that sorted.
[Ryan] Oh, my God, Steph,
that is... [Laughs]
What are you talking about?
Oh, darling, you look horrible!
Well, thanks, Mum,
it's just my favourite suit.
Stephy, you've got a, um...
You've got a... pustulous eye,
Steph.
There's no other way to say it.
I'll get you something
to fix that.
- [Steph] What?
- Now, heat or cold?
- [Jodie] Here, here, here...
- [Steph] Oh, my God, no...
[Shayla] OK, OK,
this has never happened before!
This has never happened before!
Of course it hasn't.
It's not your fault, darling.
[Hassan] Steph must have
ultra-sensitive eyeballs.
[Ros] Yeah!
Steph, I should have asked
if you had a condition
that made one eye fill with pus.
That's OK. I'll just get
the ice to bring it down.
You're gonna need
an entire military operation
to bring that thing down.
Beef! [Stifles laughter]
I hope it settles before
the boyfriend gets here.
What time's he coming again,
Steph?
Um... just later, Mum. He usually
works up until Christmas.
[Ros] What does he do again?
He's, a, um...
mid-century upcycler.
Like a furniture curator.
- [John] Furniture what?
- [Doorbell rings]
Oh, my God, he's here early
to surprise you!
- [Women squeal]
- [Hassan] Far out!
That is so something I would do!
How do I look? How do I look?
[All chatter excitedly]
Let's go.
[All chatter excitedly]
[Beef] Wait for me, hon!
Hey, Steph, do you want
an eye patch?
What? Why do you have
an eye patch?
From the pirate escape room.
[Chuckles] I've been working
there for, like, eight months.
It's in the family group chat.
[Jodie] Here we go.
- [Family] Oh!
- [Shayla shrieks excitedly]
- He's very young.
- Think it's a cougar situation?
It's lovely to meet you, Seb.
What?
Oh! No, Mum, that's Leon.
- Hey! Thanks for coming.
- [Jodie] Oh!
I brought this as a gift
for you all.
I googled 'Australian Christmas'
and that was
one of the only unproblematic
things I could find.
Yeah, that...
Well, OK, cool!
We can inflate that together.
That'll be sick.
OK. It's good to see you!
[Ros] Oh!
Of course, this is your friend!
Or person that you mentioned.
But he's a boy.
Sorry, Leon.
We were expecting Steph's
boyfriend to arrive,
but you're not him, are you?
No, because he's not here.
Whoa, that... eye looks
super painful.
Everyone, this is Leon,
Ryan's special friend
from the internet.
- Ohh!
- [John] G'day, Leon.
- Hi, Leon.
- How you goin', mate?
- Pleased to meet you, mate.
- Hi!
- Leon.
- Oh! Sorry.
That eye is scary as.
It's like something
out of a horror movie.
Hey, mate, mate,
I hear you on that.
Steph, your bung eye's
scaring our guest!
Leon, let's get your bag
through to the spare room
and get you some
Christmas crumpets.
Don't we need to go to the vet?
There's no hurry, Steph.
We need to get Leon comfortable.
Ryan, get your sister
that eye patch.
Ryan, darling. I'm sure
he'll come soon, Steph.
[All chatter]
Yeah, great. This is great.
This is perfect.
[Sniffles]
[Leon] Thank you, guys,
for having me.
Um, my family doesn't celebrate
Christmas, so I was, like,
it would be cool to see, like,
a classic... white one.
- Mmm.
- Ah!
- Huh!
- [Phone chimes]
OK, we should go to the vet
right now.
Ah, that looks better!
Don't be rude to
our guest, Steph.
We're not in a rush.
Well, actually, we are in a rush
to find out if our dog, Nugget,
is sick or not.
You called me
'cause you were concerned.
If you're no longer concerned,
let's just confirm he's OK,
as I expected.
Alright, Steph,
let's go, then.
Is that what you're wearing?
To the vet?
You don't wanna put on something
a little bit less boxy?
[Ros giggles]
OK, well, I'll be in the car.
[Whines]
Dad, there's no way
this is the fastest route.
You can turn right here.
I don't need to be told
the route, Stephy.
- It's from Maps.
- But I will tell you something.
Bet you didn't bring down
my new Santa jocks, did you?
What are you talking about, Dad?
Nugget ate through the crotch of
Dad's Santa underpants,
the ones you got him
for Christmas.
Yeah, and I really like them!
[Hassan] So the career
counsellor said that being a vet
was one of my top five
potential careers.
Yeah, 'cause I love cats,
little baby kittens.
You love baby animals.
Yeah, but when I saw Nugget, he
really, um, took my breath away.
[All chuckle]
[Shayla] Also, Dr. Lander,
it might not look like it,
but the family is
really going through it.
Yeah, really losing our minds
over the little one, you know?
[Whispers]
Barely holding it together.
Did you ask her to bring
another pair?
- I thought I told her.
- You didn't.
How am I gonna find
the exact same ones?
- I don't know where I got them!
- You got them from the city!
What are you talking about, Dad?
I'm racking my brains
about these undies!
- What'd they look like?
- I remember they were hilarious.
Comedic with
the Santa placement.
[Both laugh]
You can say what you want
about the city...
Yeah, I will, Beef.
I will say I don't like it.
You get a lot variety.
A lot of variety, John.
So, Steph, let's start a list.
A few years ago,
you bought me a body wash.
Love to get that again!
[Chuckles] I'd like
some of that too!
Steph, write that down.
'Body wash from the city'.
Anyone's allowed to go into
the city! You're allowed to go!
And, Dad, can you go any faster?
- Let's not scare Nugget.
- I'm being a cautious driver.
Steph, don't annoy your father
while he's driving.
- Now he's going even slower.
- That's right. I am.
[Steph] You are going
so slow right now!
[All bicker at once]
Also, Dr. Lander, you're
really pretty, by the way.
- Oh!
- Hassan, don't you reckon?
Absolutely!
But no one's as pretty
as my fiance.
- [Door bell chimes]
- That's just facts, sorry.
- Hassan!
- [Dr. Lander laughs]
[Steph] OK, Nuggy, let's go.
OK, baby.
[Pirate voice]
Oh! Ahoy there, matey!
Well, you've got
an eye patch on.
I do. I have, uh, an eye patch.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
There's precious Nugget!
Have you been a good boy?
Such a good boy!
Should we get him straight in?
Yeah!
[Nugget whines]
The whole family's here!
Yep, well, best to get
the information all at once.
OK. Well, let's get Nugget
in the room.
And maybe we'll just have
one representative of Nugget's
family in the room with me.
- Do you wanna go?
- [Jodie] Maybe I...
I mean, I can go.
I'm the trainee doctor.
- Oh, well, pimple doctor.
- [Dr. Lander] Oh!
[Nugget whines]
- [Laughs]
- [Jodie] Shut up, John!
We'll wait out here.
Sorry about him.
- [Dr. Lander] Oh, no!
- Take him anywhere once.
[Dr. Lander] Alright,
let's go, Nugget!
[Nugget whines]
It's, uh, not conjunctivitis,
by the way.
As a doctor,
my official diagnosis is
I'm allergic to lash glue.
Well, as a doctor of
veterinary medicine,
I just thought you were
going for a bold look.
What can I say?
The eye patch gives me courage.
Plus, Nugget loves it,
don't you, bubba?
[Dr. Lander] I'm so happy
to hear his energy's back up.
But I do wanna take
those bloods again.
- Yeah, of course. Of course.
- Yeah.
Your family's really great,
by the way! [Laughs]
Oh!
Yeah, they're definitely...
something.
OK, Nuggy.
- [Nugget whines]
- Shh, shh.
[Steph] Nuggy, it's OK.
So has the boyfriend
arrived yet?
Uh, no, he's not coming.
He was never going to come.
I was always gonna do Christmas
with his family.
And I'm hoping once this
goes well, I can just...
...head off.
[Dr. Lander] OK.
Um, I'm actually supposed
to be there already.
So I'm already letting him down
by being here.
And then I have to tell
my family I'm leaving,
and then I'll be
letting them down,
so I'm just kinda
trying to do both.
Where do you wanna be?
Sorry?
I just... I mean, like,
where would you like to be?
I know I'd definitely feel weird
leaving my sick dog behind,
but...
- [Nugget whines]
- I'm sorry.
I...I just mean, like, it's
a hard place for you to be in.
Hard position.
Terrible timing.
You know? Uh...
Bad timing.
Yeah, no, it's been...
It's been tough.
Yeah.
[Pirate voice] Oh, I'm sure
it ain't anything
old Captain Hook can't handle!
Uh...
Was that just
a little voice there?
Yeah, I mean, I do voices.
Mainly to the animals.
Oh, and they often,
um... survive?
The animals love it, actually.
It heals them.
Oh, no, I believe it.
I believe it!
I believe it.
[Steph chuckles]
- We are actually all done here.
- Oh!
I'll get the results out to you.
Great! Yeah, we'll wait outside.
- Yeah.
- You were great, bubba!
- You were amazing!
- Baby, you were perfect!
[Grumbles]
[Jodie] You're a good boy,
Nuggy. You are!
[Hassan]
That's what's crazy, though.
So, scientifically, like,
the body has to shed the weight
before it puts
back on the muscle.
[Jodie] Another piece! Oh!
He just ate it!
The jerky from before,
he just ate it!
Come on, bubba. [Chuckles]
Uh, I'm so sorry, everyone,
but the white blood cell count
is actually
significantly dropped
since yesterday.
[Shayla] What? What's that mean?
[Dr. Lander] The level he's at,
it's not critical.
But if it continues to drop
at the same rate...
...we would start to see quite
a drastic loss of mobility.
[Gasps] Oh, my God!
[Nugget pants and grumbles]
Uh, so what's the solution?
- John!
- I just...
I want to know solutions.
I would recommend
a gastrointestinal endoscopy.
Oh, so we can see if there are
any growths or tumours.
Yeah, or if it's cancer that's
causing the white cells to drop.
Done. Let's do that.
[Dr. Lander]
The procedure involves
feeding a small camera
into Nugget
which will pass back out of him
eventually
and once we retrieve it,
we would start to see the images
it produces of his insides.
[Jodie] Oh, my baby!
[John] Uh, well,
let's do that now
instead of standing around here
wasting time.
The other option is
a blood transfusion.
That will give Nugget
a little boost
while he continues to fight
whatever's hurting him.
Done! Let's do both. Let's get
this thing from all angles.
- Yep.
- Yep.
I...I do have to say that
both the endoscopy procedure
and the white blood transfusion
together are both
extremely expensive.
Not a problem.
Let's do it. We'll do it.
OK.
We just need
a willing dog donor.
- [John] What?
- [Hassan] Excuse me?
[Clears throat] A doggie donor?
Yeah, just like humans,
we have dogs
who can afford to donate
their healthy blood.
I know of a healthy pooch
we can ask.
Isn't that right, Jodes?
- [Jodie] Oh, uh...
- [Shayla] Who? Mama, who?
Mama, who is it?
- Mama, I don't get it.
- Tammy, darling.
- My phone's in the car.
- Tammy? Oh, OK.
[Emotional piano music]
[Phone line rings]
- [Phone buzzes]
- [Guests chatter and laugh]
Babe, we're in the middle of
celebrity head!
Where are you?
Seb, I'm so sorry.
Um, yep, things with
Nugget are, um...
[Guests laugh over phone]
I'm not gonna make it today.
And, yeah, I don't know about...
about Christmas either.
- What?
- We don't, um...
Sorry, we just don't know
what it is.
And I just...
Yeah, I just have to be here.
Yeah.
OK, um...
That's a massive bummer.
It is a bummer, Seb.
- He's my family dog, I...
- No, I get it, I get it.
It's just...
I'm recalibrating.
You know, I guess, like, for me,
I was just really looking
forward to doing family time
with you.
I know. I know, I'm so sorry.
I mean, you could, um...
Yeah, you could come here
if you wanted.
- Um...
- No...
It's not a massive vibe
or anything,
but if you wanted to be, um...
[Josephine] Oh!
[Laughs] That's a fantastic one!
I really can't do that, Steph.
Like, I'd have to tell everyone
you're not coming
and then turn around
and be, like,
"Oh, sorry. Peace, guys.
I'm gonna head out too."
Uh, no.
That's t... totally fair.
I get that.
Um, yeah, well, just...
Yeah, send everyone
my love, then.
Sounds really fun.
Yeah, for sure, babe.
We'll speak soon.
- Bye!
- [Line beeps]
[Emotional piano music
continues]
Sorry, it's just a lot of stress
to put us both through.
It will only take five minutes
of Biscuit's time.
- The transfusion?
- Yeah.
- I'm not sure about that.
- It's totally up to you.
And Biscuit.
- Totally.
- [Shayla] Up to you, yeah.
And also, how would you like
free lashes and infills
for a year?
Mink?
Mink!
- Oh!
- Mink.
Good boy, Biscuit!
- Good on you, Tammy.
- [John] Onya, Tammy.
Good boy.
Oh, dear. Popeye.
[Shayla chuckles]
[Tammy] Yeah, good boy!
[Door squeaks]
[Hopeful music]
[Dr. Lander] All done.
He was perfect.
[Family chatters excitedly]
Who's a good boy?
[Shayla] Oh, you got
a camera up you, Nugget?
[Jodie] Who's a good boy?
- [All chatter excitedly]
- [Jodie] Hello!
[John] Good onya, mate!
Thank you. Thank you so much!
Come on, Nugget.
Let's get into the car, love.
[Ros] He looks real good, John.
- Oh! [Chuckles]
- [John] I know.
[Jodie] OK.
- Thank you.
- Oh, thank you!
Oh. Thank you.
Thank you for today.
- [Door bell rings]
- Any time.
The office is closed
from tomorrow,
so here is my number
if you need to call in case...
What, he gets worse?
In case you need to check in,
Captain.
Wow, it's, um, brave to continue
with the pirate stuff.
- Yeah, I think I regret it.
- [Steph chuckles]
Well, I appreciate it.
- I know this one.
- Do you know which it is?
- Podiatrist.
- That's right!
I know about feet.
[Nan] Good boys.
Ryan, love, we're back!
[Ryan] Oh, yeah! How was it?
How'd it go?
[Jodie] Well, we're hopeful.
We're very hopeful.
- Now, everyone, remember.
- [Door closes]
We stay with Nugget
whenever he goes outside.
We guard every sh*t
with our lives.
- Yes.
- Can do.
In the meantime, I want
everyone's help in
the kitchen, please.
We're not gonna let Nugget's
cancer ruin Christmas!
[Ryan] His what? His cancer?
- Mum, we don't know that.
- Is there a treatment plan?
I don't know. I don't know.
It's expensive.
It doesn't matter.
We will make it work.
Alright?
Excuse me. Sorry.
Auntie and Uncle J,
Shay and I had a talk
and we would love to share
some of our personal kitty
to... to help.
[John] No. No, Hassan, Shay.
Thank you. That's not necessary.
[Jodie] That's your
wedding fund!
Aren't you guys planning
a destination wedding?
Please, please.
We've already decided.
OK? So no offence.
Don't wanna talk about it
any further. It's done.
And you know we'll be putting
in. It goes without saying.
Just money,
at the end of the day.
Spend it on bullcrap anyway!
[Shayla] Mum, Mum...
Yeah, you know what? I'd love
to throw a thou to help out.
- Hang on, a thou?
- [Jodie] Oh, my God!
Darling Leon, we are not
taking money from you!
You know what? It's chill.
Last year, Ryan helped me
set up my e-store business
and it's really launched my art
into a global audience.
So you know what, if you're
not gonna take it from me,
take it from Ryan,
'cause I've just transferred him
his e-store commission.
- [Phone chimes]
- Uh...
Oh, yeah! It's true.
- What?
- [Ryan] That just landed!
[All talk at once]
Money, Mum. On the computer.
I cannot believe
the generosity of this family.
And from our guests!
[Awkward silence]
[John] Uh, well,
I've got things to do.
Yeah, me too. I also do.
[Ros] Oh! Um, good result,
isn't it?
[Shayla] Actually,
I'm gonna go and help Jodes.
[All chatter at once]
[Beef] Where's old Johnny
running off to?
[Hassan] I think he's gone
to the shed, Pops.
[Beef] Oh! Oh.
Yes, he's tinkering away on
something terribly important, apparently.
Oh, great. Maybe I can help.
[Christmas carols
play softly on TV]
[Grumbles]
[Jodie chops food rapidly]
What is Stephy even doing here?
[Shayla] I'm freaking out
about Steph, Mama Bear!
You think I can still ask her
now that her eye's bung?
What if she's mad and
doesn't wanna be part of it
because of her bunged-up eye?
[Ros] Come on, now.
Stephy loves you.
You just gotta say to her,
"Listen, girlie.
"You're family and I love you.
"I know you're a busy chicky,
"but this is
a beautiful opportunity
"for us to reconnect."
Oh, wow, Mama Bear.
That was so good.
I need you to write that down
for me on something
so I can just say that.
OK. I'll put it
on a sticky note.
- Thank you. Thank you, Mama.
- [Ryan] It's gonna be cold.
[Nugget barks]
Hi, baby! [Chuckles]
Look who's bucked up!
Hi, bubba! You wanna
come play with Stephy?
You like your transfusion,
don't you?
You are a happy one, aren't you?
You're a bubba! Ohh!
See? You're fine, baby!
- [Growls playfully]
- Look at you!
Oh, you're fine!
- [Nugget growls playfully]
- You're fine.
And no messages. That is great.
[Man on radio] That has got
to be the funniest...
No, you can't... You can't
see it. It's not ready yet.
Oh, no worries.
I just wanted a little chinwag.
Been a while since we caught up.
I'll just...
Why don't I just come in...
No! No, we can
talk through the gap.
- Absolutely.
- Yeah.
There you go.
Great, ta.
I just wanted to say, well,
you know, if you're ever around
this summer,
it'd be good to go
to the driving range.
That'd be nice.
Yeah, yeah. Well, maybe. Uh...
If I can get time off work.
I'm not retired yet, Angus.
No, no, of course.
But, you know, you take time off
for things that matter.
Be good to get
some blokes time in.
- Mm.
- Life's short and all.
[John] Hm.
[John continues sanding]
Well, I think that food
might nearly be ready, Johnny.
Yeah, well, um...
- I'll come in when it is ready.
- You got it.
Yeah. [Continues sanding]
- I'll just wait for ya.
- [John stops sanding]
[Nan] Oh, this is lovely.
Christmas decorations...
[Ros] Yeah, Mum. We're just
gonna sit down and eat now.
Yes, I'd like that.
Wow, Auntie,
that spread looks amazing!
Thank you, Hassan.
Be nice to know how many
I'm cooking for again.
- Dare I ask about Seb?
- Mum, just drop it.
[Festive music plays]
[Jodie]
It's a simple question, Steph.
Is Seb coming today or not?
Seb's finally coming, is he?
Ohh! Thank God!
We can get Seb to curate the
dining room table. [Chuckles]
Steph, do you know what time
he's coming, though,
because it'd be good
to top up your eyelashes...
Got some bonding games
I want to play with him.
I just don't want him to be...
OK, you know what?
He's not coming, OK?
He's just doing his own thing.
Wait, what?
- What?
- Oh, Steph.
Steph, you alright?
Yeah, I don't know, Ryan.
Well, Stephy, I know how
you say you're bisexual,
but now it looks like
you're by yourself.
- Oh, Dad!
- [Hassan laughs]
Yeah, that's really cool
and funny, Dad, thanks.
Oh, Stephy, Steph,
do you want to just do
some girls time
in the caravan like old times?
I can make Hassan go up to
the servo, get some Jaffas...
I have other people I can talk
to about this, but thank you.
- Oh, really, like who?
- [John laughs]
- No, I didn't...
- No, you know what?
I'm actually gonna have dinner
by myself in the caravan.
- Steph!
- Oh, Steph!
- I didn't mean that as a joke.
- No, I...
No, it's OK,
you just don't get it.
- I...
- Steph, please!
I know you have friends, Steph.
- Have some chicken.
- I don't want chicken, Mum.
[Thumps] Can you leave me alone
for one second?
- Oh, my...
- Have dinner with the family.
- Steph, Steph!
- Have some chicken! Have some...
- [John] Steph! Oh!
- Steph!
[Grunts softly]
[Sniffles]
- [Breathes deeply]
- [Phone line rings]
- [Phone rings]
- [Festive music plays]
Steph, are you OK?
Not really.
What is it? Where are you?
[Tearfully]
I'm in my parents' caravan.
I think Seb is really mad at me.
What?
I told him that I couldn't
come to Christmas
'cause Nugget is sick,
and he was so upset,
and I just feel so guilty.
And now I'm here with my parents
and they are mad at me as well,
and I just...
...just trying to make
everyone happy...
Steph, I'm gonna be honest
with you.
You've called me at one of the
most full-on times of the year.
I only keep my phone on
in case any of my clients
try to k*ll themselves.
But you're in a caravan crying
because people are mad at you.
No, I-I-I do hear that.
Steph, we've been talking
about this all year.
This Christmas, I'm going to
need you to give yourself
the gift of honesty.
I want you to be honest
with yourself
and the people around you.
OK, but what if they just...
People who love you
will always make space
for who you are.
Now, my truth
is that I have to go
and have my private life,
and I'm still going to
invoice you for this.
[Line beeps]
[Sniffles]
[Sniffles]
[Scoffs lightly]
[Inhales deeply]
[Message whooshes]
[Gentle music]
[Keypad beeps]
[Messages whoosh]
[Sniffles and chuckles]
- [Bright music]
- [Birds sing]
[Yawns]
[Nugget whines]
Hey, baby!
Are you feeling OK?
You like Stephy's outfit?
You OK, bubba?
[Nugget whines softly]
You OK, baby?
You OK, little man?
Why don't we
get you inside, OK?
Oh, bubba. Come on.
- [Ryan] OK, Mum, Mum...
- [Jodie] I can't believe it!
I mean, it's just my luck.
[Ros] It's OK, Jodes.
Just hang on a tick, alright?
OK, Mum, look, there's
lots of places it can be.
[Jodie] That's exactly
the point, Ryan!
Yelling isn't gonna help, is it?
- Don't yell at me, John.
- Oh!
OK, stop, guys,
what is going on?
[Jodie] It's gone. Gone.
Your mother thinks
she's lost Nugget's camera.
I don't think anything, John!
I don't have it!
OK, maybe it hasn't passed
yet. It's still early.
No, it's midday, Steph.
He's already done
two shits today
and it's not in either of them!
I went through both of them.
John went through both of them!
I also did a once-over.
OK, well, why didn't you
wake me up?
To get your whole eyeball on it?
[Laughs] Sorry, that was just
super quick.
This doesn't make any sense.
Where else could it be, Mum?
- [Cries]
- [Ryan] Mum!
- [Ros] Oh, Jode!
- [John] Jodie. Jode, calm down.
- Don't cry.
- [Ryan] Mum, Mum, it's OK.
We can keep looking.
I took Nugget
down the beach last night.
He seemed so energetic.
He must have done a sneaky one
while we were down there
and I didn't see it!
I feel so stupid
I could just kick myself!
- No, Mum, it's OK.
- [Shayla] It's OK.
Oh. Ooh.
- Jo...
- I'm going.
You're going where?
I'm gonna call Dr. Lander.
- Here, Steph, take my phone.
- No, Mum...
Call the vet and just tell 'em
what's happened.
OK, Mum, what good
is that gonna do?
[Screams] Just do it, Steph!
I am so sick of doing
everything myself.
- No, J-Jodie.
- I just...
Jodie. Jodie!
I'd say
she's going to the beach.
Yeah, let's go, Beef.
OK, kids.
- Dad, are we...
- No, Mum...
Uh, Steph, just do
what your mother asks.
- [John] OK, let's go.
- [Shayla] Go that way, babe.
- Who are you?
- [Phone chimes]
Dirty thief! Give that to me!
No, no, no, Nan, it's me.
- It's me.
- Thief!
- It's OK.
- Pirate!
Nan, it's me, Steph,
the pimple popper.
- Oh, you look terrible.
- It's fine.
- Is that... Is that...
- Is that your mother's...
No, it's not, it's nothing.
- [Huffs]
- That's not mine.
D-Dad, it's not... I...
Get that filth off your phone.
It's nearly Christmas.
Nan, it... Jesus Christ!
Exactly! Jesus Christ!
We're celebrating him
with Christmas crackers,
as it should be.
[Laid-back music]
[All chatter at once]
So fan out and be thorough.
[All chatter at once]
[Metal detector beeps
and squeals erratically]
- Mum, did he go on the grass?
- [Chatter continues]
[Jodie] Love, look everywhere.
Hassan reckons
we've got to look down low...
[Jodie] John, clearly,
that thing's not working.
[Metal detector ticks]
[Shayla] We've got to think
like a dog,
like a dog that's going
for a poo that needs...
[Chatter continues]
[Shayla] Yeah, yeah, I...
[Jodie]
What have you got there, Leon?
See, Leon's being thorough.
- [Chatter continues]
- [John] I'm looking, Jodie.
You're not gonna believe
the story that I have for you.
[Dr. Lander] OK.
How do I put this?
Uh, would you rather
find a photo of a man's,
um, piece
on your mum's phone
that belonged to your dad
or a stranger?
What?
My mum downloaded a dating app
even though
she's living with my dad,
even though they're separated.
Oh, and my dad found the picture
and it wasn't his, so...
- [Chuckles]
- Whoa.
How are you handling it all?
I'm actually, um... yeah,
I'm actually not handling it.
I can't even, nuh,
think about it anymore.
Alright, why don't we just
focus on this incredible task
of sifting through dog crap
at the beach?
Oh, you definitely didn't need
to help with this, by the way.
I'm just doing my job.
I mean, I'm not a vet,
but I'm sure this is, like,
above and beyond.
Oh, it definitely is.
It's just nice to be around
family this time of the year.
I mean, even a, uh,
pervert family?
Especially a pervert family.
[Steph laughs]
[Dr. Lander laughs]
So do you not usually, like,
go home over Christmas?
Uh, it's complicated.
We're all pretty scattered, so
there's no base to go home to.
Right.
Plus I really like it here.
It's the first place I feel
like I've been able to...
...settle in for a while,
despite my break-up.
Well, I'm, um,
sorry about the break-up.
It's alright.
Sometimes things
just run their course, you know?
We both had, uh...
We had different needs.
- Yeah, I get that.
- [Chuckles]
Plus no eye patch,
so huge red flag.
- Huh.
- Oh, there's one!
Uh, OK, do you want to
- You want to...
- No, I got it.
Right in with the...
with the gloves.
That's... that's good.
So did you...
...talk to the boyfriend?
Uh, no, he's, uh, kind of, uh...
He's not replying to me.
[Laughs]
That sounds, uh, bad,
doesn't it?
Yeah, a little bit.
I don't know the whole
situation, though.
Yeah.
But...
...sounds like
you deserve better.
- This one's empty, by the way.
- Um...
- Well, empty of camera.
- Great.
It's gonna be in the next one.
- How tiny is this camera?
- I can feel it.
- OK, I assume this big.
- Oh, there's another pile.
- OK, well you have to...
- Move out of my... It's mine.
Use this this time!
You get it as high
as you possibly can,
hot as you possibly can.
When you get that smoke going,
that's the flavour.
That's the flavour of... burnt?
[Shayla] Oh, there she is.
Stephy.
I just can't believe it.
It's OK, Jodes. It'll turn up.
No, it won't.
I looked through every sh*t
ever shat today.
Flip them, Johnny.
No, they're not ready yet.
- They are. They're charred.
- [John] No.
Oh. It's nice of you
to show up for dinner.
What's with the tone, Mum?
[Barbecue sizzles]
I'm just saying,
it might be nice of you to do
what you say you're gonna do
so I'm not let down.
Oh, I've let you down, have I?
Why, 'cause Seb's not here
and I haven't been making
ba*ls of rum?
You have no idea
what I sacrificed to be here.
What's that supposed to mean,
Stephanie?
What exactly
have you sacrificed?
Well, if I'm honest,
I told Seb I'd do Christmas
with his family this year.
What?
I'm not even
supposed to be here,
and now I've let him down
and his whole family.
- [Ros and Shayla] What?
- [Beef] What? I missed that.
- The loud sizzling.
- Hold the tongs.
Well, that's just great,
Stephanie.
What about your own family?
Have you considered
how that might make us feel?
I do nothing but consider
your thoughts and feelings
and reactions to everything.
- John, we need crackers.
- Yeah, not now, Mum.
Well, that's funny, Steph,
'cause I feel like I get
zero appreciation.
- [Barbecue sizzles]
- Um, I'll be back.
Zero appreciation
for hosting Christmas.
Darl, we all appreciate you
hosting Chrissy.
Zero appreciation for loving
and cherishing two g*y kids.
- What?
- Wait, stop.
That's right, Stephanie,
he's g*y.
Or are you too caught up in
your own drama to even notice?
- Wait, Ryan, I...
- It's alright, Ryan, love.
- We're being honest, apparently.
- OK, yeah.
I'm... I'm not g*y.
[Nan] Crackers, John!
We always do Christmas
crackers on Christmas Eve.
- Yes, just give me a sec, Mum.
- [Shayla] He's not g*y.
[Jodie] But, Ryan,
I thought you and Leon...
Oh! Oh, we're platonic as,
Mrs Stool.
But to be fair, I am pansexual.
- He's a what now?
- [Nan] Crackers!
Yeah, yeah, I'm getting
the crackers, Mum!
You said a friend
from the internet.
- Just a friend.
- [Nan] What are you doing?
Uh, actually, I have something
I'd like to say.
- Yes, honey, go.
- You got this, babe.
S-Steph, I...
I don't know if it's on purpose,
but I've been a little bit hurt
because I don't know
if you've noticed,
but I've been trying really hard
to connect with you.
Um, and I feel like you've
been maybe avoiding me...
[Leon] I'm not fully sure
whether this is, like, done.
And I'm just...
Basically it's just
'cause I wanted
to actually ask you...
- Shayla, let's not do this now.
- Stephy, let her speak.
I wanted a piece of your time
because I wanted to ask you...
OK, Shayla,
I have been avoiding you.
'Cause I swear to God,
if you ask me to join your MLM
lash gel pyramid scheme
so you can give people
eye infections in your garage,
I'm gonna lose it!
Oh, Stephy, that's not right.
What are you talking about?
I was gonna ask you
to be my bridesmaid.
Oh, no, Steph.
- Crackers, Mum, crackers.
- What are those, John?
- [Nan] I don't want crackers!
- [Shayla] Yeah, I...
I was gonna ask you to be
a bridesmaid along with Mama.
I'm the maid of honour
and the mother of the bride.
[Ryan] OK. Come on, Nan.
Why don't we...
[Nan] There's always something.
No, you come and help me, dear.
I-I'm so sorry.
I-I just thought you were...
Yes, well, you thought wrong,
didn't you?
Nicely done, Steph.
I don't even know what MLM is.
- [Beef] It's OK, Shay.
- Shay...
She's got some walls up.
She gets that from her father.
- What the hell does that mean?
- John, take a cr*cker.
I don't want a cr*cker, Mum!
I've been out by the shed
trying to talk to you
and you've not let me in.
Which is ironic, given a shed's
often where men like us talk.
Oh, Beef, not everyone's close
like us, and that's OK.
It's just a different way
of doing things.
Oh, yes, Ros, we know,
you and Shay are best friends
and you and Beef
are best friends,
my daughter hates me and doesn't
want to come home for Christmas.
Mum, I don't hate you...
And I'm separated from
my husband, and you know what?
Why even come over here
for Christmas
if you just want to rub that
in our faces?
OK, I'm not dealing with this.
You could have come
to St. Vincent's, John.
- Nuggy, take a cr*cker.
- Not a word from you.
When I passed those
kidney stones two months ago.
Beef, I said
not to bring that up!
What the hell's that
got to do with anything?
As a bloke, you could have
shown a bit more care!
You try passing a chickpea
through your urethra.
- [Leon]
Oh!
- [John] Oh!
[Hassan] Whoa, hectic image.
It was a chickpea-sized stone,
John,
and not a word from ya.
How many times
do I have to say it, Beef?
Some of us have to work!
Beef, chickpea
is a bit of a stretch.
[Shrieks]
It was a chickpea, Ros!
- It was a chickpea!
- [Nugget barks]
- Yeah, I...
- [Ryan] Hey, can we settle down?
- We're riling up Nugget.
- [Nan] Or maybe...
...that's because Steph
has been showing him c*ck.
- What?
- Nan, no.
- That's enough, Mum.
- [Hassan] c*ck?
- Nan, are you sure?
- [Confidently] c*ck.
- [Shayla] Nan!
- [Beef] That's not her style.
[Ros] She likes them too, Beef.
She's bisexual.
[Hassan] Steph's been looking
at pictures of c*ck?
No, no, I haven't, and I
wasn't looking at pictures...
I saw a photo of that
on Mum's phone.
Actually, Dad, maybe you'd like
to talk about this.
No. [Stammers] Uh, no.
Jodie has a p*nis on her phone?
Face or cropped?
Oh, my God.
Mum, what are you doing?
Does Dad know that you're on
a sex app? Does Ryan?
[Ryan] It's not a sex app.
- It's a dating app.
- Oh!
- [Ryan] And...
- [Jodie] Ryan...
...yeah, I helped her
make the profile.
You made Ryan help you
set it up. That's appropriate.
I need to go to the toilet.
- God.
- Hassan, help me.
Yeah, of course. S-sorry, Nan.
[Scoffs] Well, well done, Mum.
You've managed to violate
your two g*y kids.
- Platonic, but...
- And your estranged husband.
I think that's a bit harsh.
Jodes is on her own journey.
[Beef] I'm team bloke. Did
anyone talk to John about this?
Team bloke is fine.
Mate, can you do that
somewhere else, please?
I wish you'd told me you got
sent a naughty picture, love.
I could have helped.
Helped how, exactly, Ros?
[Steph] I cannot deal with this.
This is why I've been in therapy
this whole year,
just dealing with all of this.
So I've sent you mad, have I?
Mum, you and Dad haven't had
a proper conversation in years
and now you're on a dating app
behind his back?
And you're making Ryan help you,
as if he's not enmeshed enough
in your relationship dysfunction
as it is?
You have no boundaries
with Ros or Beef,
who are complete enablers,
by the way,
and none of you know
how exhausting it is
just to be around you.
OK, um, Steph,
that's not true.
Well, you are just around it
all the time, Ryan.
You're indoctrinated.
[Ryan] Well, yeah, exactly,
Steph, I am.
I'm here and you're not.
You've come home with this ideas
about how we're all wrong,
and, yeah, people may not be
their best right now,
but maybe that's because
everyone has to walk
on eggshells around you
just to be good enough.
My God, you can be
so judgemental, Steph.
And, you know, you never
used to be, but you are now.
Well, I just can't do
anything right by any of you.
I'm only here
because I care about Nugget.
Well, if you care so much
about Nugget,
why didn't you even offer to,
you know,
chip in with some money?
You're supposed to be
the big-city doctor.
I'm still a registrar, Mum.
You know, I have
a ton of student debt.
I would love to give money,
I really would,
but I have rent in the city.
Yeah, but you should have
savings, Steph.
I taught you how to be smart
with your money.
Yeah, and I did have savings,
Dad. I just invested them.
In what?
Therapy and boxy blazers?
No, I just invested $6,000
in Seb's business.
- [Shayla and John] What?!
- Stephanie-Joy, who is this man?
And what do we actually know
about him?
You gave this guy $6,000
and he can't even come down here
and meet us?
Also, $6,000,
wasn't it old furniture?
No, it's startup costs,
so you just have to buy
the furniture first.
Mid-century furniture's, like,
really valuable, so it's...
It... We discussed it
as a... as a couple.
So what's
the business model here?
Here's an old piece
of furniture,
pay for it like it's new?
[Beef] I have to say I'm lost
on this one.
He wants to take on IKEA?
Good luck to him.
- [Ros] Hmm!
- It's the...
The resale val...
The resale value is...
is quite big.
Darling, regardless of whether
it goes to Nugget or not,
I think you should call up
this Seb
and say, "Listen,
I'm living like a beggar..."
- [Shayla] Exactly.
- [Nan] Beggar.
"..and I'd like my money back
on this dud investment."
- [Nan] Yes.
- You should tell him right now.
- [Shayla] I agree, Mama.
- Absolutely.
[Jodie] Yes, Steph,
you need to call him!
We might need that money
for Nugget!
I can't just call him, Mum.
He's busy with his own
family Christmas, OK?
I have texted him a thousand
times about everything,
about Nugget,
and he isn't replying to me!
- [Family gasps]
- I wanna k*ll him.
- [Ros growls]
- I actually wanna k*ll him.
So you can't
get your money back?
No, I can get it back.
He just has to sell
the furniture that he bought.
With your money?
With Nugget's cancer money!
Great, so our baby's sick,
our daughter's been scammed
out of all of her savings.
What a fantastic Christmas.
OK, I think we should go
and see him.
See who?
We should go and confront
this Seb guy,
get your money back for
another a*s camera for Nugget
and then get on with
our family Christmas.
- [Ros] I say why not?
- [Hassan] I'm with Shay.
I've got things
I want to say to him.
We can't just rock up.
It's Christmas Eve.
OK, Steph, you can stay here
or you can come with us,
but me and Hassan are going.
And I'd prefer you come with us
because you really
hurt my feelings
with that bridesmaid thing
before,
and if I were you,
I'd want to make me happy
so I get over that
in a healthy way.
I'm putting on my trackpants
and I'm going.
[Hassan] Yeah, I'm gonna
get the keys.
- [Shayla] Come on, kiddo.
- [Hassan] Let's do this, Stephy.
- [Nugget grumbles]
- [Nan] Where am I going?
[John] We're gonna get
some money, Mum.
- [Nan] Money?
- We'll get them ready.
Now they're all following me
For ice in my breast
at zero degrees...
You OK, cuzzy?
You should be,
because this is mad!
- Like, as in mad good.
- Of course it's good.
She's standing up for herself.
She's saying, "Enough is enough.
"You have failed to
meet my needs as a woman,
"and because of that, I am
terminating this relationship.
Whoa, babe, scary.
I just got a glimpse
into my future.
Oh, as if.
OK, I think I feel, um...
Yeah, really good. Really good.
- Yes, cuzzy-in-law!
- Whoo!
- Whoo!
- Yes!
- Whoo!
- Whoo!
Oh, wait, wait, wait.
So, I play this song
to hype myself up
before every important
yet challenging situation.
It's actually so good.
I played this at work
before your old man
gave me a promotion.
That's how good it works.
Let me play it.
- Let's do it. Uh.
- [Hip-hop music plays]
[Both rap] How many dudes
you know roll like this?
How many dudes you know
flow like this?
Not many, if any
Not many,
if any
How many dudes you know
got the skills to go
And rock a show like this?
Uh-uh, uh-uh
I don't know anybody...
- Huh!
- We literally don't know anyone.
[All laugh]
And the best part is...
So, that's, like,
the best bit in the song,
and it comes back, like,
at least two more times.
- Yeah, that's a chorus, babe.
- Yeah, it's a chorus.
[Shayla]
Babe, it says turn in here.
- [Music thumps]
- Whoa...
[Shayla] What is going on?
Did you know about this, Steph?
[Engine revs]
[Handbrake engages,
engine stops]
Wow. So this is where
the Prime Minister lives.
OK, let's roll.
We should probably take a beat
just to...
OK, we're doing this.
[Doorbell rings]
- [Chuckles]
- [Guests laugh nearby]
Yes?
How can I help you?
Firstly, hello,
and merry Christmas Eve.
Um, secondly, you don't know me,
but I'm here
on official business.
I'm sorry, darling,
I'm not following.
- Are you lost?
- Apologies, madam.
But we're gonna need to
speak to Sebastian.
And I'm going to
need to ask why.
Yeah, sorry, but who are you?
You don't know these people,
Sebastian?
Yeah, you don't know us,
and that's on you.
We're your girlfriend's cousins.
Steph.
- [Seb groans in disgust]
- [Steph] I'm sorry, Seb.
I've been trying to contact you.
Steph, what happened
to your, uh...
It's an eye patch, bro.
Haven't you ever seen a movie?
Don't change the subject.
Stephanie, darling,
what's all this?
- Are you OK? What's going on?
- No, I'm fine.
I'm really sorry that I didn't
make it to the warm-up lunch
or the other Christmas events
after that.
Seems full-on.
Uh, it's just been
a really hard time because...
Oh, yes, with your dog, darling.
Yes, very sad.
[Sarcastically]
Yeah, you seem so sad.
Excuse me, I don't like
your tone, missy.
I don't like your tone,
Mosman-a*s mum.
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
OK, OK, OK.
Let's all take a breath.
- Alright? Babe?
- Mm.
Mm.
Like we did in the class, alright?
- You ready?
- Yeah.
[Both inhale]
- [Hassan] And out.
- [Both exhale]
- OK, I love you.
- Love you too.
Alright, what I think
is that Seb and Steph
should have
a proper conversation
about their relationship
and the money he owes her.
- Hassan...
- [Laughs]
I highly doubt Sebastian
owes Stephanie money.
Oh, my God.
Well, actually, Josephine,
he... he does owe me money.
I lent Seb $6,000
to start his furniture business.
He promised he'd pay me back
when he finished flipping
the Danish chair collection.
Yeah, and it would
come in really handy
should we go down the
chemotherapy route for Nugget.
[Scoffs]
Do you owe Stephanie money, darling?
Yeah, I do.
I just wanted to do things
on my own for once, Mum.
Oh, we would have given you
what you needed, Sebby.
Why didn't you just ask?
- So how much was it again?
- It was $6,000, madam.
- [Whispers] It's going so well.
- [Whispers] I know.
- [Hassan clears throat]
- [Shayla] Mm.
Alright.
OK.
I trust this won't bounce.
It won't.
OK, thank you. I trust you.
Now, why don't you two say what
you need to say to each other
and then stop intruding
on my family's Christmas.
You're lucky Hassan
was here to relax me.
Yeah.
Steph, why are you
doing this now?
Seb, I've been trying
to message you.
Yeah, 'cause I'm being present
with my family during Christmas.
I thought you said that you
weren't gonna make it
and then you're rocking up
with your eshay cousins,
like, in front of my mum?
- That's really heavy, Steph.
- [Scoffs]
No, you know
what's really heavy, Seb?
My dog is dying
and you don't even pretend
to care.
So thank you
for your parents' money,
which is actually my money.
Nugget deserves it.
[Shayla] Yes!
Nice house, big house.
[Shayla and Hassan laugh]
[Hassan] Let's go!
Is this what it's like
every year?
Uh...
[Car doors close in distance]
No. Yeah.
- [Family chatters]
- Hold up, here's trouble!
[Steph and Shayla
cheer and exclaim]
[Family chatters excitedly]
No, no. So, I totally
blacked out, but we got it!
- Oh!
- [Beef] Great, a check!
That's great!
I hope it doesn't bounce.
[Jodie] You got your money back.
Good girl!
So proud of you, Stephy!
Alright, group hug.
Group hug with our Nugget.
Let him know there's nothing
to worry about. Come on.
- Oh!
- Oh, Nuggy!
- [Whines]
- Got your money now, darling.
We got your money.
[All talk at once]
[All chatter]
[John laughs]
[Chatter continues]
Don't you look so much better?
[Steph] Hi, baby! Hi, bubba!
[Both laugh]
[Family] Aw!
Merry Christmas Eve, Steph.
Merry Christmas Eve, Shay.
[Sniffles]
[Uplifting music]
[Nugget whines softly]
[Uplifting music continues]
[Breathes deeply]
The camera! I found it!
It is literally
a Christmas miracle...
[Poignant music]
[Jodie sniffles]
[Tearfully] I'm sorry, Stephy.
[Jodie] We tried, Steph.
We really tried.
Came out of nowhere.
[Tearfully]
But I found the camera.
[Both sob softly]
- [Emotional piano music]
- [Jodie sighs]
I'm so sorry.
I didn't know him long,
but he really was special.
[Sniffles and cries]
I can bring over the ashes
to you this afternoon.
[Jodie] Thank you.
Oh, and you're welcome to stay
for lunch if you'd like.
I mean, only if
you don't have other plans.
- Oh, yes.
- [Dr. Lander] I-I don't.
So lunch would be great.
If you're happy
with me being there.
Yeah.
That'd be nice.
[Gentle guitar music]
OK.
Masked pole.
Four letters
I don't know, Nan.
Is it 'stick'? That doesn't fit.
Masked pole.
It's supposed to be good
for my brain.
I can't remember now.
I can't remember things anymore.
Stephy...
Oh.
- Shay, I just...
- I just wanted to give you this.
And, um, even if you don't
want to be my bridesmaid,
I just want you
to have it because it's...
...like, a pretty chic robe
to wear whenever, so...
Shay, of course
I'll be your bridesmaid.
It's beautiful.
- [Sniffles]
- Thank you.
Um, also, cuzzy,
what's an MLM?
Oh, it's like a business
where you rely on family
and friends
to recruit new members
and sell things onwards.
Wow! So cool.
MLM. Mama!
- No, Shay, it's actually not...
- Mama...
[Sighs]
[Nan] Steph...
- Stephy, is that you?
- Yeah, it's me, Nan.
Where's Nugget?
Oh.
Um...
...why don't we get dressed, Nan?
- I am dressed!
- [Laughs] I've got to get you...
You're the one
that needs to be dressed.
- Look at you.
- I know.
Is that what
you're going to wear?
We might have some
other clothes we can wear.
What's Shayla going to wear?
She always looks very good.
[Sombre music]
Um, I-I'd like to say something.
[Whispers] Thanks, Stephy.
Whew. [Chuckles sadly]
Um...
[Sobs]
I always wanted a dog
when I was little.
And, um, when we finally
got you, you changed my life.
[Jodie chuckles]
You loved jerky.
- God, you loved humping.
- [Family laughs]
And you loved us
even though we are us.
[Chuckles]
[Sniffles]
[Whispers] That was beautiful.
[Ryan] Oh!
[Nan] Oh, John!
[Ryan] Dad. Dad! Dad! Hey.
- John. John, love, be careful.
- No, it's fine.
- I just want it done.
- Johnny, take it easy, mate.
Don't tell me
to take it easy, Beef!
Dad, just stop.
Dad, just... Dad.
Dad, it's OK.
Just stay out of the way, Steph!
OK, Dad?
Why? Why? [Sobs]
[John] Why?
[Sniffles]
[Sobs]
[Poignant music]
I'm... I'm sorry.
[Weeps]
- Oh!
- [Family murmurs]
[Jodie] Oh, John!
[Groans]
It's bloody beautiful, mate.
[Sobs]
It's gorgeous, John.
There's no other dog like him.
No. [Sobs]
- He was a cheeky bugger.
- [Family chuckles fondly]
Yeah, he was.
And, Beef, I'm sorry
I wasn't there
for your chickpea stones.
No, mate, they... It was
a couple of sesame seeds.
Just sesame seeds.
- [John sobs]
- [Jodie] Oh, Johnny.
- [John moans]
- [Jodie] It's OK.
It's OK, love.
[John sobs]
I miss him.
[Sombre music]
[John sobs]
[Subdued chatter]
I've never seen
my, uh, dad cry before.
Really?
Ever?
No, I think he actually cried
when his last car
had an oil leak.
The mechanic told him
it had to be impounded.
[Both laugh]
Um, I took your advice,
by the way.
Told Seb how I was feeling.
Oh.
Um, I didn't know
that was advice.
[Both laugh]
Good. That's... that's good.
How... how did it go?
Yeah, not great.
Um, I think it's probably over
between us.
I'm sorry.
No, it's, um,
probably for the best.
You know, sometimes things
just... run their course.
True.
So, John, did you have anything
you wanted to say about...
...what you saw on my phone?
[Inhales] Yep.
Downgrade.
Very funny, John.
[Chortles]
I've already got a vision, Mama.
Yeah, of course you do.
Thigh-high split, plunge neck.
Perfect. You got a beautiful
body and a great sense of style.
- Yep.
- And hair.
Yeah, hair,
I'm thinking quite, um...
...quite big, piled on top...
- Of course.
- ...or something like that.
[Family chatters]
- Yeah...
[Chatter continues]
- Hey, Mum.
- Hey, love.
Decorations look good.
- Ryan did most of them.
- [Chuckles]
Look, I am sorry
about you and Seb, Steph.
- You don't have to say that.
- No, I mean it.
I-I want you to know...
I was only asking about
when he was coming
because I want you to know
that we support any relationship
that's special to you.
I don't know
how special it was, Mum.
Well, who knows?
And anyway, there's plenty more
fish in the sea.
People who see
how special you are.
- [Family chatters]
- [Laughs]
Good to be here.
Thank you for having me.
Look,
I know I don't always say
the right things,
but you must know I...
I don't care about rum ba*ls.
I just want to spend time
with you.
And love you.
And I've missed you.
I just, you know...
I don't have a therapist to tell
me all the right words to say.
It's OK, Mum. I-I know.
But I am, like, also sorry,
um, you know...
Being distant.
Steph, it's OK, Steph.
- It's OK.
- Yeah.
- It's OK.
- [Sniffles]
- What am I gonna do?
- About what?
About the pictures of
the you-know-what on my phone.
- Yeah, um...
- I mean, I haven't responded.
I don't know what your
chat has been like, Mum,
but if you're not
interested anymore,
you can always just,
like, unmatch that person.
What, just unmatch them,
just like that?
Yeah.
- Really?
- Yeah.
[Hassan] Babe, babe,
look who it is.
Who's this coming in?
- [Gasps] No!
- [Cutlery clanks]
[Shayla] No way!
- Oh.
- Oh, my God.
- [John] What?
- [Clears throat]
- [Nan] Who is he?
- [Ryan] I think that's...
- Is that Seb?
- [Shayla] Yes, it's Seb.
- Who? Steph's boyfriend?
- The boyfriend.
[Nan] Whose boyfriend?
The, uh, black outfits
are pretty rock star.
Our dog died, Seb.
Oh, damn.
I'm so sorry, Steph.
And fam.
At least you got to say goodbye,
though, right?
What are you doing here, bro?
Hello again.
[Hassan] Hey.
Merry Christmas, everyone.
[Beef] Merry Christmas, mate.
[Shayla] Is that it?
You could have written that
in a Chrissy card, babe.
Do you maybe want to go
somewhere private and talk?
No, no, not happening.
Anything you want to say
to Steph, you can say
in front of the whole family.
- Yeah.
- That's right, Shay.
- That's right.
- Yep.
OK. Well...
I'm sorry if I let you down.
Like, wasn't intuitive
to your needs
or whatever.
It's just, you rocking up
to my house
wearing an eye patch
looking for money,
I was like, "Yeah, OK,
something's disconnected here."
[Shayla] Hm.
And I'm here to fix that,
you know, by...
...hearing you.
Seb, I really appreciate
the effort...
Thank you.
But I think you should go.
What?
- You should be with Grum Grum.
- [Shayla] Mm-hm.
Steph, what do you mean?
I ditched everything to be here.
- Like, on Christmas.
- No, I know.
I took a $200 Uber to be here.
- What?
- $200!
- You're kidding me!
- [All exclaim at once]
What's wrong with you?
I'd be demanding
a helicopter flight for that.
Outrageous what some of
those companies do.
[Shayla] That's right, Dad.
[Steph] Yeah, it's just
a bit late, Seb.
I just want to be with
my family.
- [Shayla chuckles]
- [Seb] OK. Um...
So...
I'm just struggling
to keep up, Steph,
because, like,
you hate your family,
you don't want to
be with them...
What?
You want to spend
Christmas with my family,
then you bail on that,
and then I'm here
and you're like, "Go home,"
like, what...
What's going on?
Like, you're being crazy.
- Whoa!
- [John] Hey, hey, hey!
Taking a $200 car trip's
being crazy, mate!
And if you think the drivers
get that, you'd be wrong.
- Absolutely.
- OK, maybe I am being crazy.
But I just want more, Seb.
I want someone who
wants to be there for me
and it's easy for them, and
maybe even my family like them.
[Seb] Mm, OK.
Well...
Well, great.
I just think you should go, Seb.
Easier said than done.
[Chuckles]
Like, where the f*ck am I?
[Scoffs] Oh, that's nice.
Oh, mate, zero manners.
[Steph] Sorry, Seb.
It's fine.
I'll just, um...
...just Uber home.
- [All protest]
- Oh, no!
- Waste of money.
- Holy...
Hassan, darling,
why don't you give him a lift
to the station.
- Well, I don't heaps want to.
- Yeah.
But I will.
- [John] Good on you, mate.
- [Ros] Good boy.
Babe, babe, can you save
a slice of pav for me?
- Yeah.
- [Hassan] Oi!
You want some pav for the road?
No, I'm good.
[Hassan]
What, you never had pav before?
You get the meringue from Coles,
delicious cream and fruit
on top.
No, I've had it. It just...
It's less calories
than you think, you know?
I've been basically eating
chicken for a couple of weeks
'cause I'm getting married and
I'm shredding for the wedding.
- That's my fianc, Shayla.
- [Family chatters]
[Chatter continues]
- [Ros] No, please!
- [Nan] Who was that person?
- Onya, Stephy.
- Should we put out the Scotch?
- Stephy!
- [Ryan] Mum.
- Oh.
- Go, go.
[John] Time for one.
[Steph] Hey, Doctor... Um, Ella.
Ella, slow... slow down.
Dr. Lander, where are you going?
I...
I think I should leave, Steph.
I mean, with...
with Seb rocking up...
You...
You said you wanted to be
with your family, so...
Oh, no, I didn't mean that
about you.
No, no, that's OK, really,
I-I...
You clearly have a lot going on,
so...
Um...
I really just came to say
that I am sorry
about Nugget.
He really was special.
And I-I'm a vet,
so I've seen all of them.
[Chuckles]
Well...
...you guys
have a good Christmas.
Um, Ella, you should stay.
I-I would love it if,
um, if you stayed.
And, um... [Sighs]
...that's what you want?
Yep, that's, um...
that's what I want.
You know, in case I need
a distraction
from the endless pain
and suffering
that I'm in.
- Well, I'm...
- Mm-hm.
I am known for
my distracting magnetism.
[Both laugh]
- [Uplifting music]
- [Family chatters indistinctly]
Dad, yours is coming.
Ryan.
Ryan, this is for you.
I had to hide it
because you always peek.
- Yeah...
- From all of us.
Do you like that, John?
- Oh, my God.
- [Family chatters]
You know what? I got you...
- You didn't get me...
- [Chatter continues]
- Thank you.
- No way!
- Nana, this is for you.
- Oh, thank you.
That's so nice.
- Merry Christmas, darling.
- You too, Mum.
[Chatter continues]
- It's kinda nice, you know?
- [Uplifting music]
[Jazzy music]
The holiday's here
With all of its cheer
Come join us
Sending our wishes
To you at Christmas
The elves making toys
For girls and boys
In Toy Town
It's fun all around
Completely spellbound
The snowflakes
Whirling in the sky
Children spy...
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Nugget Is Dead: A Christmas Story (2024)
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