[chuckles] I've been walking,
talking, walking, all right?
[upbeat music]
[sighs] Okay.
I cannot seem to find this.
State Street.
[beeping]
[camera shutter clicking]
Okay, that's State Street.
[camera shutter clicking]
Um.
I think you kind of need my
permission to take my photo.
Is that right?
Yeah.
They're used for limited,
nonprofit and education.
I think you should
check the law on that.
That's on Van Ness.
What is?
The law school.
Right between those two trees.
Those two buildings?
Yeah, if you go down
there and bust a right.
Right next to
the green building?
- Yeah.
- Yep.
Yep.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
[camera shutter clicks]
Wow.
Uh, let me guess, for limited,
nonprofit, or educational use?
No, that's for me.
Personal use.
Well, what are you
studying, Mr. Peter Parker?
[chuckles] It's Dennis.
And I'm studying
to be an engineer.
I also work for the
school newspaper.
I'm Anna.
All right, Future Lawyer Anna.
Smile for me real quick.
Let me get one more.
Man, let me get two.
[laughing]
[camera shutter clicking]
Smile, baby.
[laughs]
[upbeat music]
[light cheering]
[cheering]
Do not forget that we have
that thing with the partner
tomorrow night.
All ready?
Babe, I sent you a
calendar reminder, clearly
that you did not check.
Like the invites
I sent you, right?
You mean the ones about sex?
Exactly.
Well, I responded to mine.
You responded with
a meme talking about,
I like that for you.
[laughs] I did
like that for you.
Come on, babe, you know I just
have tons and tons of work
and I'm kind of
stressed about making
a good impression tomorrow.
Yeah, I'm stressed, too.
So since we stressed together,
let me stick this stress off.
Don't.
Do not do that.
- Oh, here you go.
- No.
No, here you go.
You're about to give me
some random scientific fact
that clearly only the
boys learned in school.
But studies have showed that...
That orgasms release
400 times more prolactin.
Yes.
And it makes you tired...
It makes you tired.
And rested and sleepy...
It makes you rested and
sleepy, and all the things.
You know.
You know.
So let's...
- Listen, babe.
What?
Let me get through this
party tomorrow night...
Huh?
And I promise you, me
and you is pound town, okay?
Okay?
But until then, mama
got to go to sleep.
You mo...
[sighs] I'm so tired.
My d*ck's still hard, though.
That's okay, baby.
It'll go to bed.
All right, go.
Yo, D, did you text
me your fantasy pics?
Oh, yeah, man.
I forgot.
I did text it, but I
forgot to press Send.
You know how it'd be.
You know, I'm really
starting to feel like you don't
take this league serious, man.
Here we go.
Bro, what is you talkin' about?
I've been taking this
serious since we first
started working together.
Do you really want to
have this conversation?
I don't.
Man, what done crawled
up your a*s, bro?
Probably Vera.
Yo, leave my wife
out of this, man.
Are you talking about your
a*s or this conversation?
Look, I'm just saying,
we're all married,
but we find time to
commit to sh*t together.
Hey, hey, tell the truth, yo.
How long has it been?
How long has it been since what?
Since Vera gave you some a*s.
It's all right.
It's a safe space.
It's okay.
You can say it.
Man, it's been about
three months, y'all.
See, you a lucky man.
- I'm lucky?
- Hell yeah.
You and Anna still get to do all
the exciting sh*t, the
exotic trips f*cking,
and the balcony f*cking.
Yeah.
Like, if you real
excited, like you can
hit it in the Starbucks bath...
[crying] She won't
even let me look at it.
I can't suck her
titty or nothing, man.
All right.
I don't see why you guys
don't have the same thing.
Hey, hey!
- I'ma... I'ma...
- Hey.
Yo, are you f*cking
kidding me, dawg?
Hey, don't say no
sh*t like that to him.
There's no vag*na strength.
Feel superhuman.
Here, watch some
porn or something.
Knock his a*s off with
this g*dd*mn pool stick.
I don't give a
f*ck how big he is.
Here, man, watch
some porn or something.
Calm down.
sh*t.
My bad.
Just cherish these
moments, all right?
So once you have kids,
that sh*t is a wrap.
Mm-hmm.
And the cooch becomes
no man's land.
Nah, that sh*t is bad.
Like, Sahara Desert dry, bro.
It's nothing.
Nothing out there.
Well, we haven't
really even talked
about kids, to be honest.
- Good.
Don't bring that sh*t
up either, because when
she gets that itch...
It's the end of everything.
It's over.
You are a lucky man.
And it could be like that.
If you say so.
Hold it, man.
Keep it turned towards you.
You ever let your girl
take you in the booty?
Come on, man.
[serene piano music]
[chatter]
You seem nervous, babe.
- Yeah.
- I don't mind.
It's a big night, huh, ain't it?
- Yeah.
- So, babe...
- What?
- Do me a favor?
What's that?
None of your bad jokes.
None of my bad jokes?
What's wrong with my jokes?
You know your jokes
a little nuanced.
My jokes are a little nuanced?
Yeah.
I am hilarious, though.
Yes, at home
without an audience.
Okay, babe, I am going to
go speak to the partners.
All right.
I'm gonna speak to these beers.
Okay.
Anna!
Oh, my God.
We were just talking about you.
All good things, I hope.
You impress so far.
Oh, well, cheers to that.
[chuckles] I was taking a
look at the Holborn case,
and it might be worth suggesting
that they move the London
offices to Frankfurt.
Word is that Germany is gonna
be offering even further tax
concessions for fintech.
Not even on the
account, and she's
using initiative to expand
her purview for our company.
You are gonna go
far, young lady.
Yo.
What up, cuz?
You g*ng g*ng?
You know it.
[chuckles] What
are you claiming?
You must be Anna's other half.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's who I am, Dennis.
Right, nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you.
I just realized, this is
your first company party.
Yeah.
You know what you
got to do, right?
Not embarrass my old lady Anna.
[chuckles] No, man...
What?
You got to jump in the pool.
Who?
Well, I mean, it's
either you or Anna.
Man, get out of here.
I know you're playing.
I ain't even listening to that.
No, no, no, I'm serious.
It's like an
initiation, you know?
The partner of a new employee
has to show their support.
Ain't nobody doing
nothing like that.
Hey, Ken, what did
you have to do here
on your first company party?
Jump in the pool.
Made my wife partner.
What?
You see.
It's what you've got to do, man.
I mean, if you really
want to support Anna.
I'm here to support her.
That's the whole point.
- Okay.
And you don't want her
looking for upgrades, do you?
[scoffs] Come on.
Now ain't nobody
upgrading better than me.
Well, it's time
to get in that pool.
[upbeat music]
[splash]
[laughs]
Oh, sh*t.
Was that your husband that
just jumped into the pool?
Uh, is it?
Is it my... I don't know,
I don't wear glasses.
I... [sighs]
That's your husband.
Okay.
Sorry, sir, that's
the love of my life.
[whispering] Seriously, you
couldn't just behave yourself.
You had to embarrass me.
In my defense...
[NORMAL TONE] There
is no defense, Dennis.
[camera shutter clicking]
Oh, I like that.
Put your hand on
your hip for me?
Yeah, right there.
Yeah, I think it's about over.
I done messed this
all the way up.
Why?
I humiliated the
sh*t out of her, man.
Oh, bro, you've done
10 times worse, homie.
Easy for you to say,
you doing your hobby.
Look, man, I'm just saying,
if she wanted to divorce you,
she would have done
a long time ago, bro.
So I'm paranoid?
Again, you humiliate the sh*t
out of her on a daily basis.
Hurtful, man.
Hurtful.
Look, you remember that
time that you sent her grandma
a d*ck pic by accident?
Yeah, I regret it to this day
because she keep texting me.
Uh-huh.
And the other time that you
wanted to impress her so you
competed in a nacho contest?
Oh, yeah, I forgot about that.
Yeah, but we didn't.
You're lactose intolerant, man.
You sh*t all over yourself.
[farts]
Excuse me.
Anyway, I just farted.
Look, man, I say
all that to say,
your relationship is a lot
stronger than you think.
So you think I should
make it up to her?
- That's so sweet.
- Thank you.
Okay, well, hold up.
Hold up.
What you got in mind?
Like flowers,
candy, doin' you know.
Boo.
That's so basic, bruh.
You want to be a little
more adventurous.
Try something more spontaneous.
But don't you spontaneously
f*ck this sh*t up, man.
How can I do that?
You do it every day.
Turn around for me?
Yes.
[upbeat music]
[typing]
Oh, gosh.
[phone ringing]
[phone tolling]
- Ouch, ouch.
That's just too tight.
Too tight.
Too tight.
- Hey, boo.
- Hey, busy bee.
Are you going to
Connie's shower tonight?
[groans] Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's later today.
sh*t.
I know that queen
of the calendar invite
didn't forget some sh*t.
[laughs] No, it's just
been a long two weeks, okay?
Yeah, but I'll be there.
Are you going to be there?
If you're asking me to
celebrate the fact that there's
a tiny parasite that's sucking
every essential nutrient out
of her body, then
fine, I guess I will.
But that's a little too fluffy.
Hello?
Ava, what are you doing?
In the middle of a photoshoot.
But the question is, will
there be any fine men?
All right, girl, bye.
You've wasted enough
of my billable hours.
I'll talk to you later.
Mm-mm.
Flip this up a little bit?
Okay, Tom, are we going?
Are we ready?
[upbeat music]
I think it's strange
Monica is here.
Girl, don't start.
I'm just saying, she dated
Connie's husband in college.
Come on, they
didn't exactly date.
- Exactly.
- [laughing]
You are busting it wide
open for my man in college
and now you're hugging
me at my baby shower?
I mean, I could never.
Wait, didn't you sleep
with Robert in college, too?
b*tch.
This is not about me, okay?
Stay on subject.
- [laughs] Okay.
I'm hearing some things.
I don't know.
I don't know if he
really wanted it
or Connie kind of coerced him.
I'm hearing she did something
like with a turkey baster.
I don't know what happened.
But I'm worried.
I'm concerned.
I mean, she looks beautiful.
She does look
really, really cute.
Buzza!
Let's go, baby!
[cheering on television]
Let's go!
What's up, babe?
You good?
Uh, yeah, yeah.
I'm good.
Who's playing?
Jacksonville and Buffalo.
And we winning.
[laughs] I mean, yeah.
You... you all right?
Talk to me.
What's wrong?
[television clicks off]
I think I want to have a baby.
[speaking French]
[chuckles] I think
I want to have a baby.
You think?
I know I want us to have a baby.
But I thought you was gonna
wait till you become partner?
Well, I changed my mind.
Well, what about
our five-year plan?
I also changed my mind.
How are we gonna
live our best life?
- Objection!
- Overruled.
[sighs] I knew I shouldn't
have gave you that stupid
DVD box set of Boston Legal.
[mumbling]
It's that g*dd*mn
baby shower, wasn't it?
Well, I mean...
- I knew it.
- A little bit.
But I'm a free thinker.
You would have had
to have been there.
You would have got fever, too.
I mean, a full on migraine,
okay?
And she was glowing.
Everybody was happy to see
her, to see her fat belly,
her cute little sausage toes.
It was so sweet.
Damn, baby fever.
I knew.
You caught up with
the baby fever.
I... I don't know, babe.
I feel like it's
deeper than that, okay?
I... I don't know.
It...
What else could it be?
Like, we're happy.
What else do we need?
I just feel like having
a baby will add something
amazing to our lives.
Isn't our life amazing now?
Yes, our life is amazing,
babe, but as husband and
wife, right?
Come on, the plan
is to eventually go
from husband and wife,
move to the next phase.
I feel like in my heart
that the time is now, babe.
It's gonna be exciting,
don't you think?
I want to have a baby.
Oh, great.
But... but...
But?
I just feel like we got
a lot more stuff to do.
We got to really live our life.
Like, I got so much other
things I want to do with you.
Okay, babe, like what?
Like, romantic
walks on the beach.
You know I'm like... like I want
to play the violin for you,
you know?
I want to skydive, sh*t
like that, you know?
Dennis, you don't
want to do any of that.
All right, you right.
I don't even do sh*t like that.
I mean, but for real, I
do want to do some stuff.
Hey, listen, you
have my ear, okay?
So on some real,
what kind of things
do you feel you want
to knock off your list
before having a baby?
Exotic trips with you.
Okay.
You know, we go
on a yacht, you know
the mega yacht vibe like that.
You know, threesomes and sh*t.
What?
What was... run it back.
What was the last?
Threesomes.
Three... like, 1, 2, 3?
[laughing]
Uno, dos, tres?
[laughing] Threesomes,
you're funny.
That ain't funny.
That is hilarious.
Babe, you've never,
ever mentioned
threesome ever in your life.
What are you talking about?
That is disgusting.
[laughing] Ew.
[whispering] Oh, you're
giving me the serious face.
You for real?
- Man.
- Oh.
Oh, babe.
Babe, come here.
Come here.
Don't... don't walk away mad.
Come on, text me.
Text me an invitation
to sex, babe.
Come on.
[whispering] f*ck,
I was so close.
[music playing]
I need a dime to find
A baby?
sh*t.
Told you.
That God damn baby shower
gave her baby fever, Mike.
- Told you.
- Told you.
I ain't got time for that.
I mean, I want a baby,
but not right now.
I got other things...
I want to live my best life.
- Told you.
- Told you.
Y'all told me, too, bruh.
That sh*t crazy.
- Bruh.
Of course, we told you
this was gonna happen.
Man, it always happens.
Hey, now, what
concessions did you ask for?
- Concessions?
- Yes, sir.
She wants your baby batter.
Nast... you nasty
as hell, man.
I ain't got time for that.
What concessions
did you ask for?
I mean, well, I asked for
more exotic trips, more sex,
you know like, we gonna
watch porn here and there.
Boo!
Boo.
Look, when Vera
wanted our first child,
I got a pool table, dawg.
Yeah, this is a nice pool table.
Damn right.
Took two kids get the man cave.
Look, your baby
batter has value, kink.
Get something out of it.
Man, I asked for a threesome.
[record scratches]
Okay.
Go on.
Go on.
I asked her for a threesome.
- Okay, and what she say?
- She laughed.
Aw, man.
Bro, you need to lock that in,
like, immediately with that.
That is clank, clank.
That's got to happen like...
that's like the unicorn of all
asks for a married man.
It's better than, like, a
pool table and a man cave man?
Man, f*ck that pool table.
Sex with your wife
and another nasty...
- Dirty.
- Gutter-a*s chick?
Bro, that's the ultimate flex.
So should I ask for
a threesome again?
Hell, yes.
Yes, man!
[yawning]
[upbeat funk music]
There go my baby.
[chuckles] Hey, boo.
What?
What's this?
Oh, we roleplaying?
You Olivia Pope and I'm the
person she trying to get out?
- Please have a seat, sir.
- Right here?
Mm-hmm.
Where you get this
'80s briefcase from?
They don't even make them, no...
oh, you're taking it serious.
What is this?
That is a contract.
A contract?
For what?
Well, we are two
parties who seemingly
want different things.
I want a baby.
You want a threesome.
So I have just a
few concessions.
Wait a minute, you're trying
to take away the Jaguars?
Nah, you can't do that.
No, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
I'm not taking away anything.
See, the contract simply
outlines a list of chores
that I would like to see
done around the house.
Now, of course, any deviation
from said list, then, yes, that
takes away not
only the threesome,
but your precious football
for an entire year.
But there is a threesome, right?
There will be a threesome.
Sir, I would suggest
you direct your attention
to the list of chores
that I need to facilitate
said threesome.
- Where is it?
What part I looking at?
Well, we've got
tabs A through C.
"Clean the gutters."
Babe, I feel you're
skimming and not reading.
"Cut the grass."
"And pray daily."
I got it.
Where do I sign?
I would strongly suggest
you read the clause, hon.
Let me look... let
me look one more time.
Let me look.
That's skimming.
That's... no.
Nah, I can read fast.
Okay.
It's like short circuit.
- I went to school, too.
- Okay, you're playing.
Here.
Fine.
Go ahead.
I need you to... yep, last page.
Sign here.
Initial there.
And signature there.
Hey.
[laughs] Let's get to f*cking.
Come on, babe.
[banging]
[yelping]
They sh**ting?
What?
What?
Oh.
[yelps]
[banging]
What is that?
What is that noise?
It is too f*cking early.
Ah!
Dennis!
[shouting]
Oh, what's up, sugar?
What are you doing?
Item number 3, rebuilding
the cabinets in the kitchen.
What?
[screaming]
What?
That's what you asked me to do.
I'm doing what it
say in the contract.
Now, let me be.
Look, I know what I
said, I wrote the list, okay?
[banging]
Dennis!
Why are you doing it right now?
Why are you doing it so early?
Because if I knock
it all out right now,
I can have it all
done in a few weeks.
[rhythmically banging]
[hammer clatters]
[music playing]
Hey, hey
Let's go
Hey
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey
Let's go
Hey, hey, hey
Let's go
Hey
Hey, hey, hey, hey
Uh-oh
Let's go
Put your hands up
Let's go
Put your hands up
Let's go
Put your hands up
Let's go
Put your hands up
Let's go
Put your hands up
Let's go
Put your hands up
Let's go
Put your hands up
Let's go
Put your hands up
Let's go
[phone ringing]
[humming]
Let's go
Put your hands up
Let's go Put your hands up
[upbeat music]
sh*t got in my eye.
Got in my eye.
Ah!
sh*t.
[electricity zaps]
Whoa!
Whoa.
[groans]
[grunting]
Oh, boy.
[groans] f*ck.
This is perfect.
Okay.
It goes without saying how busy
our next quarter is gonna be.
The Coleman Tobacco case
around the corner, and all eyes
are on us as the
Tomomoto account.
We've got a darn good team, Dad.
Very capable lawyers
under my leadership
that'll really rise
to the occasion.
I couldn't agree with you more.
That's why I'm gonna let Anna
spearhead the Tomomoto account.
Anna, Dad?
But I've personally handled
the Tomomoto account
for the past five years now.
And you have been great.
But I need you to
concentrate on Coleman
and other high-profile
cases we have coming in.
But Anna?
Is a highly capable
asset to this firm.
And I'm more than
confident in her abilities.
Anna, I've spoken
with Nyoka Tomomoto,
and she's very excited
to speak with you.
So do me a big,
fat, personal favor.
Yes, sir.
- Knock 'em dead.
- You got it.
Thank you.
I look forward to it.
Thank you.
If there are no questions,
that'll do it for me, Brad.
No, sir.
Best of luck, Anna.
But we know you're
gonna be great.
Oh, I think we should
go over some things.
I know this client really well.
I couldn't agree more.
[clapping]
[light applause]
Thank you.
Thank you, sir.
[mid-tempo western music]
Hey, bruh.
We ain't seen you in, like...
One month, 10 days,
13 hours and 27 seconds.
Right.
[chuckles]
[whimsical music]
[laughs]
Ha!
[sighs]
I did it.
- Did what?
Oh, woo.
God damn, boy!
You ain't been bathing, man.
You smell like chitlins
and sweaty ba*ls, dawg.
- Yeah, it's bad, bruh.
- f*ck you.
- Nah, bullshit.
- sh*t bull.
I'll be damned.
- My God.
Pay respect.
All right, hold on.
- Pay respect.
- Please.
- How did you do this?
- Come on.
Teach us.
Y'all don't deserve...
Please teach us, man.
Can you get my
girl to do it, too?
Y'all don't deserve...
Can you get my
girl to do it, too?
- I want, too.
- Come on.
Come on.
- Threesome.
I hate... I hate my life.
- I want a threesome.
- What?
- I want a threesome.
- Come on, what you want?
- I want a threesome.
- I want one, too.
- Oh
- Threesome
- Do y'all deserve...
- Ooh, threesomes
- Yeah, yeah
- Yeah
Yeah, threesomes
Do y'all deserve...
Threesomes
Yeah, yeah
yeah, threesomes
Y'all don't deserve no...
Hey, I want a threesome
- We want the threesome
- I want a threesome
- We want a threesome
- I want a...
I want a...
We want a threesome
Get y'all a*s up.
A threesome.
I can't believe he finished
that freaking list.
I have to give it to him.
A man with vag*na on the
mind can move mountains.
And apparently, bricks,
lumber, and roof tile.
Hey, it's not the
worst thing, girl.
What?
You wanted a baby, right?
That is the main thing.
I mean, yeah.
Okay.
So this is what's
gonna happen, okay?
At the end of the day, he's
gonna turkey baste your cooch
with millions of swimmers.
Ah, ah, ah, listen.
Listen.
And then you're gonna
get a little moocher out
of this who's gonna
look like both of you
and drain your
bank in perpetuity.
I actually look forward
to the perpetuity.
Mm-hmm.
It's the threesome
that I have questions.
Oh.
Oh, yes.
Threesomes are f*cking amazing.
[groans] Well, well,
well, actually, no.
It does depend on who
the two other people are.
And I feel sorry because
you with Dennis's wack a*s.
Hey.
Any woman would love a
threesome with me and my man.
Mm, that's cute.
You standing by
your wack a*s, man.
[scoffs] ooh, oh!
Ooh, ooh.
You want to see one of mine?
No, I'd actually like
to just put on our pajamas
and continue our girls' night.
And why do you have
a recording of it?
Treasured memories.
Mm, oh, wait.
And let me give you some
really good advice, okay?
Okay.
Are you ready for this?
You never get good
advice, but continue.
You're such a hater.
Listen, this is important, Anna.
Do not let him pick.
Very important.
Okay, wait, I did state
in the contract
that I get to pick.
But, like, why?
Is that... is that a thing?
Good. Yes. Oh.
Oh, boo!
Oh, boo!
Here.
I'm scared.
[moaning on television]
I'm about to b...
[moaning] [moaning] Oh!
Hold your mouth.
That is nasty.
Mm-mm.
- Girl.
I didn't like that.
That was like a
drunk game of Twister.
But, you know when
girls are in charge,
oh, it feels so much better.
Ooh!
Ooh.
Ooh, yes, you want to see?
Okay, you got to see this one.
No, I'm good.
Just... just... just tell
me why women are better.
Just explain it.
Well, you know, because,
well, we know how to do things.
Women like, we understand.
You know all this in-out,
and like [moaning].
Oh, this?
Is that what your men are doing?
- Am I lying?
- Oh, poor thing.
That is not how
we define good sex.
See, you know, a lady.
Who knows a woman's body
better than a woman?
Ooh, I know, her gynecologist.
- b*tch.
- What?
My gynecologist know me.
- Okay, listen listen.
Anna, look.
I'm gonna tell you the truth.
You can let Dennis
control this if you want,
but that's like
letting a toddler
paint with mashed
potatoes, messy, regretful,
and an un, unexciting, b*tch.
Okay, advice taken.
All right, but you gonna
have to prove this to me
that you know what
you're talking about.
How many women have you
actually had a threesome with?
[BRITISH ACCENT]
Lots and lots.
[BRITISH ACCENT]
Oh, lots and lots?
[BRITISH ACCENT]
Lots and lots.
[BRITISH ACCENT]
Loads and loads.
Some of the best sex ever.
Ooh, girl,
- Girl, ew.
I'm telling you, mm,
they ain't nothing wrong
with a little carpet munching.
Really?
Yeah.
Okay, let me show you this.
This girl.
Woo!
Let me see.
Let me see what you
talkin' about, 'cos... oh.
And don't knock
it till you try it.
[moaning on television]
Yes.
Oh, and look at this.
Look, look, look.
She's about to do that thing.
She's gonna squirt.
[screams]
[grunting in video game]
- Baby!
- Oh, sh*t.
Babe!
Ooh!
We are gonna have the
best threesome ever.
Ever, ever?
The things I just learnt.
Okay, now I do have
some conditions.
Conditions, here you go.
You know me.
Wee, yay!
[upbeat R&B music]
It might be my confidence
Is it obvious
Are you nervous?
Very much so.
Don't trip.
What do you think of her?
Ooh, black dress?
Wouldn't say no.
Oh, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
She caught me... she
caught me staring.
It's good.
She smiled You good.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
I think I'll go say something.
[whispering]
Baby, what are you doing?
Don't. Wait.
Sit, sit, sit, sit.
Oh, yeah, I forgot.
I forgot.
The contract states
that you get to pick.
Yes, I get to pick.
Yeah, you get to pick.
[whispering] okay, go for it.
Go for it.
Go for it.
[NORMAL TONE] Just ask
her who she voted for.
All right.
I'm okay.
It might be my confidence
Is it obvious
Hello.
Hello.
My wife and I would like
for you to come talk to us.
That's your wife?
Yeah.
She's beautiful.
Why don't you go
say hello to her?
Okay.
Thank you.
I'll be right back.
Thank you.
Thank you.
You are so beautiful.
Thank you.
So are you.
Thank you.
You know, my boyfriend was
supposed to pick me up, but...
But?
You want to come hang with us.
Why don't you?
Okay, so you guys are trying
to have some fun, yeah?
- Mm-hmm.
- I mean...
- I mean, yeah.
- Yeah?
Okay.
Well, I'm down.
Let's do it.
- You sure?
- I am sure.
Great.
Let's do it.
[R&B music]
Okay.
So I will be right back.
I'm going to find out
This way.
Nice place.
Thank you.
Nice dress.
[laughter]
Thank you.
It'll look even better
if you take that thing off.
Dennis.
Yeah.
But yeah.
Can I have a drink?
You sure can.
What would you like?
Whiskey.
Whiskey?
Oh, I see what type
of town you're on.
Yeah.
But I can't stay too
late, though, because I
have class in the morning.
Oh, for real?
You go to the university?
Go Hogs.
No.
What, you nurse school?
Cosmetology?
Flight attendant?
Go, Tigers.
I'm a senior.
I go to Millville High.
[record screeches]
- Whoa.
- Nope.
What the hell?
Honey.
This is a productive
mentorship meeting.
Get that back in there.
No.
I'm 18, silly.
We can get this done
in, like, 30 minutes.
Come on.
- No, I'm good.
I don't want to go to jail.
You know, you get the Uber
done in, like, 30 minutes.
You're going to be in the Uber.
Hurry up and get you back home,
so you can go back to school.
[laughter]
Oh, would you look at that?
The Uber's already here.
Let me get you up out of here.
What?
- That's not an Uber.
That's my daddy.
- Your daddy?
What you mean?
- My daddy.
Yo.
I've been tracking your phone
all night looking for you.
And you, you a dead man.
No, no, no.
Daddy, daddy, you know what
your parole officer said.
Parole?
Okay, he's got a bad
knee, but you need to go.
- I'm going.
- No, no, no, no, no.
[rock music]
Daddy!
What's that?
- Daddy.
- Daddy?
Yeah.
[whimpering]
You know, last night
really wasn't that...
Nope, not a single word
ever about last night.
But you got to think...
Zip.
You ain't give me...
Zip.
If that got...
Bop, bop, bop.
Peter Piper pick a...
You trying it.
You trying it.
If you hit me...
These ain't paid veneers.
I just got them put in.
You better be happy
this is almond milk.
It better be because you
know I'm lactose intolerant.
Or is it intolerant lactose?
You sure this isn't too much?
[whistles]
I see you, Dinner Suave.
I don't know.
I just feel like I take
orders at a steak house.
I ain't overdressed?
Well, babe, what are
we supposed to wear, huh?
We got to embrace the culture.
You want us in T-shirts?
Some tracksuits?
But this looks
like a kid outfit.
No.
Babe, come on.
Trust me, you look amazing.
When it all comes
together, the whole thing...
yeah.
Come on.
Put your chest up.
There you go, babe.
And bring me a steak,
porterhouse, medium well,
and a baked potato.
No, the pants don't
make your a*s look fat.
[salsa music]
[music screeches]
Oh, sh*t, babe.
Oh, sh*t.
- Come on, now.
Don't do that.
Don't do that.
We shut it down just now.
Come on.
Why y'all ain't dressed?
[sighs]
Y'all ain't f*cking with it?
- What's the faces for?
We look good.
Don't do that.
Don't do that.
We might be.
[salsa music]
Welcome.
Hi.
I'm Anna.
This is my husband, Dennis.
Oh.
Maria.
Big D.
[laughter]
Oh.
You have a strong handshake.
You feel that?
You must be very
handy around the house.
I do a lot of things
with these hands.
I... yeah.
But you know what I'm saying.
Usually with our first
timers, we like to pair up.
You have a dancer's body.
Have you danced before?
This body?
My body?
Man, I took a class
in, like, college.
It's just nothing.
So you'll dance with me?
Yes.
And I'll pair you with one
of my experienced dancers.
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
I'm excited.
[laughter]
I'll give you five minutes
before you ask for a threesome.
But after five, I'm good?
Mm-hmm.
All right.
Six.
Abuelita.
[upbeat music]
Dance with Abuelita.
Watch Anna and I, but
try not to dance as hot.
I'm good.
No, no, no.
Salsa is a complicated dance.
She's an experienced dancer,
but a little old and delicate.
Oh, sh*t.
I ain't no flower horse, so you
can dance as hot as you want.
I'm good.
I don't... I don't
need to learn.
- Yes, baby.
- No, I don't...
I'm good.
[salsa music]
Come, baby.
Salsa dance is... it's
a dance that forces you
to explore your sensuality.
That is definitely
what we came to do.
Then I will help you both.
I'd like that very much.
[cracking]
- Help.
- Oh, sh*t.
My ankle.
- Help me up.
- My ankle.
- Help.
- My ankle.
sh*t.
Oh, my ankle.
My ankle.
My ankle.
My ankle.
[sirens wailing]
I hate you.
I hate you.
- You'll be all right.
- [sobbing]
She probably going to need
a new hip and everything.
Hope she got the insurance.
She should be good, though.
What?
You took out one
of my best dancers.
Tell me about it.
You suck at dancing.
That was the whole
point of coming.
You're supposed to teach me.
You must also know you
are banned from my class.
Banned?
What type of time you on?
Baby, she just banned us.
I heard.
I heard.
That's crazy.
Like, we just got... she
gon' ban both of us?
Like, that's crazy.
[clears throat]
No, she is welcome anytime.
Yeah, she wants you.
Did you at least get her number?
- Hmm?
- Did you get her number?
What happened?
Was those dance moves
even part of the lesson?
Well, I don't
think that the moves
you were putting on granny
were AARP approved either.
- That ain't funny.
- I laughed.
- No, you shouldn't.
- You don't think it's funny?
No.
I'm banned.
She said you can stay.
What I'm supposed to do?
I don't know.
But next time, maybe
lift from the core.
It's all in the core, babe.
Let's go 'cause we
ain't get no threesome.
Okay.
Wait. Wait.
You go over there,
and you have a seat.
I'ma stay and finish my lesson.
- Stay?
Yes, thank you for coming
and... and supporting, but...
- This is a us thing.
- I know, babe.
Just go grab your hat.
Go grab your hat.
I'm going to work on
getting you back in class.
Okay.
Have a seat.
Ol!
[laughter]
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Don't f*ck her without me.
[upbeat music]
Hey Anna.
Have you seen Sherry?
She was supposed to have
that brief ready for me,
and I keep getting
sent to voicemail.
That girl, no.
But if I see her, I'll
definitely send her your way.
Oh.
And by the way, I just
want to let you know,
I'm really sorry that you
got taken off of the account.
The Tomomoto account?
You didn't know?
You know what?
Forget I said anything.
You didn't hear it from me.
Nope.
What the f*ck?
[scoffs]
Anna.
Can I help you with something?
I'm
No longer spearheading
the Tomomoto account?
That's right.
Was there something wrong
with the work I've done on it?
Not at all.
Brad's running point.
And he thought it'd be better
if he just did it himself.
Brad?
Yeah.
Brad's had a close
relationship with Tomomoto
since he clerked for me.
So Brad just gets what he wants?
Sorry.
I should not have said that.
No, that's an obvious thought
you're entitled to have.
Brad said he asked you
to connect with him so he
could bring you up to speed on
some things, but you declined.
Did he also mention...
never mind.
Excuse me.
Let's get back to work.
What do you say, 140 grand
on the small account?
[angry music]
Hi.
Hi, Anna.
Sherry.
Don't you have a brief
that's due to edit?
- Yeah, I was just...
- Oh, were you?
You're just going to
go clickity click?
How are things?
Why did you remove me
from the Tomomoto account?
Well, that client
requires a special touch.
A special touch that
you don't think I have?
No, one that requires a lawyer
to be professionally focused.
See, I tried to meet with
you about the client's needs.
And you chose not to.
Uh, rightfully so, Brad.
You're sitting here preaching
to me about professionalism.
And I just caught you in
here with Ed's secretary.
[scoffs] And jeez,
my mouth is open.
Get some air freshener.
It stinks.
Look.
Anna, we need lawyers around
here to be laser-focused, okay?
You can't be caught up in
the insignificant details
and the little
people in your life
that like to jump into pools.
Okay.
First off, my marriage is
not an insignificant detail
in my personal life.
And what I do with it
outside of this office
has no bearing on
my job performance
and definitely should have
zero interest for you.
Look Anna, it is important
that you know that me removing
you from this account
had absolutely nothing
to do with you and that...
that little gremlin
that likes to get wet.
What's his name?
Dennis?
That's the guy.
Yes.
That guy, Brad,
is my husband, okay?
You keep telling
yourself that, sweetheart.
Wow.
I will keep telling myself that.
And you maybe want to keep
our name out of your mouth.
Brad, you're so bothered.
What the heck are
you talking about?
Yeah, I feel like you're
bothered because I'm
the only woman in this building
who you have zero chance with.
I am married and
in love with a man
who loves me back
to the point that I
don't even see the pervert.
Don't flatter yourself.
I've had significantly better.
Oh.
Yeah, okay.
Well, according to
Lacey in accounting,
everyone's seen it, Brad.
Mm-hmm.
Everyone's had a little Brad.
And by little, I do mean little
because I've seen the pictures.
I'm not impressed, Peewee.
[R&B music]
Yeah
Wait.
So you're telling me
she was 18, R. Kelly?
Man, and in high school.
Yeah.
You did the right thing by
getting her out of there,
though.
Tell that to my front door.
No, you should have
called the police.
Dude was on his third strike.
I can understand where
he was coming from.
Oh, wait.
So he's good?
He slipped me this.
Bro, why is there a naked
tattoo dude on your phone?
That's his boy toy in jail
he said I remind him of.
Say less.
Say less. Say less.
Nah, it ain't nothing.
It just keeps him off
my a*s, literally.
All right.
First thing I learned about
How not to be chased
What's this?
Molly.
What I need molly for?
Dog, come on, man.
Cut the sh*t, man.
Y'all cut the sh*t.
I'm tired of this.
Listen, women love molly.
All right?
But whatever you do, do
not eat before you take it.
It's something about them
little pills that's, like,
baby laxative in it or
something.
Oh, this too.
What?
This is... hold on, man.
That's the address of this club
my cousin was telling me about.
- Okay.
- Oh, yeah.
Everybody there is 21 and older.
They do IDs.
And they're all young and hot
as f*ck like your wife, dog.
- What?
- Huh? What?
I don't know if Anna
going to be with this.
Oh, I am with that.
Yes, babe.
I am with that.
So we really doing this, huh?
Oh, yeah.
We in there like swimwear.
We not using some type of lines.
You sound like a Auntie.
Yeah, I came in...
Don't use that...
It's giving, auntie.
Yeah.
You need to start looking
at your memes better.
Yeah, you got to come
with some new words.
Give me some new words, babe.
- It's up.
- What's up?
- It's...
- What's up?
No, it's up.
What's up?
It's just... just say it's up.
- It's up.
- You overthinking it.
- It's up.
- It's up.
Oh, my God.
You been in the courthouse
too long, like...
Yeah.
H-O-E-S I-N
T-H-I-S H-O-U-S-E
Where the hoes?
Bring them out
Yeah, go on
Make it bounce
Make them send the cash
Out there to your account
H-O-E-S I-N
T-H-I-S H-O-U-S-E
Where the hoes?
Bring them out
Yeah, go on
Make it bounce
Make them send the cash
Out there to your account
Hold up a minute
Doing it slow
from a distance
Now the crew Tokyo drifting
Shorty got yams
I don't care if
it's from her mama
Or she been
pumping syringes
Shout out to the surgeon
Yeah, she brought her
body to attract the boss
And it's working
They offer in person,
lots when she's twerking
Shakes like she's
awfully nervous
If you married
She's going to
cause a disturbance
Cause your wife
ain't a true freak
You brought your ring
n*gga, you sleep
She throw that
thing like a QB
Three-step trap
Wi-fi mother,
mama need that WAP
I just took the Benz
to the detail shop
My name bring
the females out
We got some
H-O-E-S I-N
T-H-I-S H-O-U-S-E
Where the hoes?
Bring them out
Yeah, go on
Make it bounce
Make them send the cash
Out there to your account
I got the R-E-A-L...
[indistinct conversation]
Where are we going?
[indistinct]
Oh, we good?
Say less.
[laughter]
I said I live
big baller life
She said is
that baby yours?
I call it having a bag
So turn up and ship me
some mass because it's some
H-O-E-S I-N
T-H-I-S H-O-U-SE
Where the hoes?
Bring them out
Yeah, go on
Make it bounce
Make them send the cash
Out there to your account
That's good, right?
H-O-E-S I-N
T-H-I-S H-O-U-S-E
Where the hoes?
Bring them out
Yeah, go on
Make it bounce
Make them send the cash
Out there to your account
Hold up a minute
Do it slow from a distance
Now the crew Tokyo drifting
Shorty got yams
I don't care if
it's from her mama
Or she been poking syringes
Shouts to the surgeon
Yeah, she brought her
body to attract the boss
And it's working
They offering purses
Lost when she's twerking
Shakes like she's
outwardly nervous
If you married
She's going to
cause a disturbance
Cause your wife
ain't a true freak
[laughter]
- He'll be here any minute.
- Okay.
And on a big boy truck.
Big boy truck.
Come on, now.
[cheering]
Oh, here he come.
Here he come.
Here he come.
[overlapping speech]
Yeah.
That's him.
That's him.
Yeah, boy.
- Ride for Dennis?
Am I Dennis?
- Yes, baby.
- Hey, I'm Dennis.
I'm Dennis.
Come on.
I'm Dennis.
I'm Dennis.
Come on, now.
Come on.
Open the door.
It's Dennis.
[screaming]
Why is he in my car?
Oh, Dennis, no!
[screaming]
We ain't like that.
We ain't even like that.
Don't... don't judge us.
Don't judge us by that little...
don't judge us.
Now get on in there.
[screaming]
Y'all already know.
Y'all so drunk.
Oh, it's up, baby.
It's up.
It's up.
Let's ride.
Let's ride.
Let's ride.
Let's talk about sex, baby
[laughter]
I'ma lay you
down like a baby
Before you even
undress, baby
Yeah
I done had had them all
Nice.
You enjoying the view?
Yeah.
Fresh man
Not the one behind
the sophomore
Room full of squares
I'm stepping on them
like they're tiled floors
In the place
Ain't nothing change
but the uniform
Got the smoothest charm
Take them make them
bring the crew along
She get to business
every time
Her birthday suit comes on
[laughter]
Okay.
Yes.
Yes.
- You have a zipper?
Yes.
Let me see your zipper.
Okay.
Let's just... let's go up.
[laughter]
Babe.
Bring some bottled
waters on your way up.
Huh?
Bring some bottled
water on your way up.
- Bottled water?
- Yes.
Say less.
[laughter]
Yeah.
That's right.
[stomach bubbling]
Oh, sh*t.
Listen, whatever you do, do
not eat before you take it.
Something about
them little pills
got, like, baby laxative
in it or some sh*t.
[stomach bubbling]
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
[suspenseful music]
[distant moaning]
[upbeat music]
[laughter]
No way.
Oh.
There he is.
We thought this was going to
be a little bit different.
[laughter]
So did I. So did I. The f*ck?
Let me know if you
find the earring.
Yeah.
I'll keep an eye out for it.
Yes, then you can
come by my shop.
First massage on me.
Thank you.
All right, ladies, let me know
when you get home safe.
Okay.
Yes.
Bye, Dennis.
Bye, m*therf*cker.
What she mean by
come by your shop?
Look, I promise that I
will make it up to you.
I'll even set up the next.
We'll get, like... ooh.
I know you like a woman who...
sh**t, I got to pee.
Oh, no.
Whoa. Whoa.
What is that smell?
Dennis?
What did you eat?
[groovy music]
What?
A married l*sbian.
As I live and breathe.
Last night did not
make me a l*sbian, b*tch.
- Mm-hmm.
- Okay?
And you have done far worse.
This is true.
Yes.
Yes.
This is very true.
But I am shocked and in awe.
And molly, b*tch?
Molly.
Why have I never met her before?
I mean, the molly...
Was molly-ing.
[laughter]
What I tell you?
What did I tell you?
Oh, my girl.
It was so... oh,
it was so freeing.
I mean, just... oh, every
sensory motion, just
n*pples tingling.
Girl, everything.
Everything.
Okay, so what about Dennis?
He liked it?
- Uh, Dennis, he got sick.
- Oh.
Yeah, he couldn't...
he couldn't join us.
Oh.
Poor boo.
That's too bad.
Let me find out
you on Dennis' side.
I am... I'm not on his side,
but the threesome was his idea.
Well, technically,
in the court of law,
it was a threesome.
There were three...
Sh... shut your
lawyer a*s up, okay?
I know I'm going to need
to make it up to him, but...
But?
But what?
I got to be honest.
I'm happy we didn't
have a threesome.
Ooh, girl.
You have definitely
been around me too long.
That's almost devious.
- No, no, no, no.
Don't get me wrong, okay?
It was a beautiful experience.
But the only thing that I
want from my man is a baby.
Okay.
I get that.
That's cute, But
you're being selfish.
No.
Okay, three attempts
at a threesome,
and the only one getting
their toes curled is you?
The man signed up
for a threesome, boo.
And?
So give him a damn threesome.
I don't want to
give him a threesome.
Okay.
All right.
I want a baby.
You're going to mess around
and be a married l*sbian
or lick long enough
to become a villain.
Mm-hmm.
Not you cursing me with
my own villain story.
Yeah.
You don't worry
about me over here.
Get that ice cream
out your hair.
[laughter]
You so nasty!
[groovy music]
Hey, baby.
I'll try not to
disrupt your work.
But you are.
You're still angry.
I think we need to talk.
Oh, do we?
Things have gone
too far, you know?
I feel like we should just...
I don't know, start
back from the beginning.
Yeah?
Anna before the threesome?
That is not fair.
But that's really
what happened, right?
I mean, you got to experience
the time of your life
by yourself.
You did, not me.
Am I lying?
No, you're not lying.
But as I recall,
you were really busy
doing something else.
So what's really on your mind?
Are you coming down
from the molly?
Because I've heard
about those things.
I don't do them, but
I've heard about them.
I don't know, Dennis.
Maybe it has something to do
with wanting to have a baby,
you know, like we talked about?
Starting a family,
like we talked about.
So everybody gets
what they want?
Oh, so you don't want a baby?
I never said that.
But having a threesome
is more important to you.
Anna, stopping putting
words in my mouth.
I ain't say that neither.
So that I'm clear, a
threesome is what you really,
really, really, really,
really want and need to happen
before we have a baby?
I need a threesome.
Yeah.
I mean...
Okay.
I mean, that's what men need.
We need more than one.
It's only in America
that that happens.
Done and done, baby.
All right.
I'll listen.
It's about time you listen.
Oh, you wait.
You wait and watch what I do.
Honor thy man.
It's like the fifth,
sixth commandment.
In between, like
fifth and a half.
Oh, that's the new Bible.
[quiet music]
May I help you?
Sorry.
May I come in?
Please don't.
Why don't you like me, Anna?
I mean, I'm charming,
rich, handsome...
arrogant, spoiled, womanizing.
I was going to
say lovably humble.
You're a d*ck.
Oh, come on.
I'm so sorry.
You're a small d*ck.
Look, I just came in here
to ask you one question.
What do you want, Brad?
Why don't you like me?
What do you want, Brad?
Usually sex.
Okay, that is sexual harassment.
Oh, stop it.
I didn't mean with you,
unless, of course...
Okay, just get the
f*ck out of my office.
Come on.
Go.
You newbies,
you're all the same.
Rain check?
Oh.
And don't forget whose
name is on those checks.
You sure you
won't let me forget?
I won't.
f*ck face.
Who would ever want
to have sex with Brad?
[gags]
[upbeat music]
[phone ringing]
Hey, Eva, what was the name of
that website you told me about?
What the hell wrong with you?
Is you for real?
Wow.
What's wrong with you, Dennis?
What's going on?
What's the problem?
What the hell you got me
doing a threesome with a man?
Okay.
You wanted a threesome,
so I set one up for us.
Yeah, you set up one for you.
That's a train.
Well, I thought
that's what you wanted.
That ain't even legal.
You don't want to have a
legal debate with me, babe.
Oh, you're gon'
go there with me?
I mean, I'm going there.
You signed on the dotted line.
Who are you?
Oh.
Look, Steven will be there
tomorrow at 8:00, okay?
For our date.
I ain't going.
Well, you signed on
the dotted line, babe.
There's choices and
consequences to everything
in life, so make your choice.
I don't believe
you're going to do it.
Yeah, we'll see.
You're just joking.
You... I ain't even
going to trip.
Just this.
[groovy music]
So now, how many
lawyers have you seen?
None.
My friend said you
was the cheapest...
I mean, best one.
You've come to the right man.
Now, let me get this straight.
You say that your wife has
been sexually harassing you?
What?
No.
I just need my
position strengthened.
Clause 17 messed with my
manhood, and I can't have that.
Oh, threesome
with another party.
I caught that.
Yeah, threesome with a man.
Tricky, tricky, tricky.
Now, the contract does not
specify whether the third party
was a man or a woman.
So ain't nothing I could do?
Well, you can decide if
you want to be on the top,
or the bottom, or...
Nah, for real.
Ain't nothing I can do?
- Oh.
Oh, that.
Oh, yeah.
Now... now, I can draft an
amendment to the contract.
But if she's already
decided on Mr...
Stevens.
You know, to deliver the meat,
you know, hide the salami...
Huh?
- Slip in the sausage...
- All right.
All right.
Calm down.
That's too much for me.
sh*t.
But I can do something.
Oh, so there is
something you can do.
Perfect.
[keyboard clicking]
I can only imagine.
It looks like the first
typewriter ever invented.
Oh. Oh. Oh.
I made a typo.
I'm all out of paper.
Esther.
What are you calling me for?
You know it's hard
for me to get in here.
Oh.
If it ain't Twinkle Toes.
Oh, sh*t.
I should kick you
with my good foot.
Oh.
So you're the one who
broke my sister's foot.
Mm-hmm.
That's your sister?
- I'm going on my break.
- Wait.
Wait.
Wait.
Now, now, can't you
see how busy we are?
Why can't you take your lunch
break when things quiet down?
I'm taking my lunch break now.
You dickhead.
Let me catch you outside.
Hello.
Let me catch you
out in the parking
lot cause I'll sure
get you with my
[muttering incoherently].
The f*ck?
You'll have to excuse my sister.
You know, she doesn't
have a professional bone
in her wrinkly old body.
I'll just come back
later and get the stuff.
[quiet music]
So let me get this straight.
She set up a threesome
for you and a dude?
Wait.
What did Frank say?
Frank's writing up
the amendment now.
You think your lawyer wife
is about to go for that?
Pthhpth.
I'll find out by tonight.
That's a horrible idea, bro.
You can't let him go out
like that, though, I mean,
unless he's into that type of...
Man, what the...
why is y'all always on
that type of time, bro?
Look, obviously, she's bluffing.
I don't know.
You know, some women are
into that guy-guy action.
I'm with Z, though, man.
Call her bluff.
What other choice does he have?
A man, I loose football.
Yeah, you can't lose football.
Bruh.
Listen, he got to
make a stand somewhere.
Okay, but I'm sure he don't
want to die on that hill.
More like Brokeback Mountain.
[snickering]
I knew I should have never
came to y'all for no advice.
Nah, nah, you know
why you come to us.
I wish I knew how to quit you.
So why don't you?
Why don't you just let me be?
What is that?
What y'all doing?
Is that "Brokeback Mountain"?
- No.
Speaking of, you got my Blu-ray?
First of all, listen, it's
a beautiful f*cking film.
Heartwarming as f*ck, bro.
Y'all take this
bromance way too far.
Out of all the movies y'all
could watch, that's what
y'all want to watch?
- How about this?
It'll prepare you for the
threesome you're about to have.
A threesome with a dude?
Don't.
Girl, you need your own
reality show at this point.
Well, he did say he
wanted a threesome.
1, 2, 3.
We all know you're bluffing.
Right?
Anna Ana Nicole.
Wow.
All of my names.
Okay, I am not the
biggest Dennis fan,
but you can't ask
him to do this.
But that's just the
thing, my sweet friend.
He won't.
So you're calling his bluff?
Exactly.
He will never go
through with it.
Dennis and another man?
No.
[laughs]
What if he does?
Oh, he won't.
I may not have
the best advice, okay?
But girl, I do not think
this is a good idea.
I don't have a good
feeling about this.
You're right.
I know.
You don't give the best advice.
I'ma let you have that
one because you're not
thinking straight.
Girl, don't mess around
and lose your man
trying to prove a point.
We're good.
I got this.
Mm-hmm.
You calling me crying.
[chuckles]
Happy?
No, man, not at all.
You said you were going
to write a way that
was hard for her to refuse.
The f*ck is this?
She'd have to have a heart
of stone to reject that.
Did you read what
you just wrote?
That says, dear Anna, please,
please, please, three please,
can you let my client
have more involvement
in the threesome process?
He allegedly doesn't want...
allegedly don't want
to bone another dude?
Thank you so much.
Frank Mann.
Attorney at law.
What the...
if begging was a legal route,
I could have did this myself.
So you want me to put it in
more robust legalese language?
Yes.
Esther.
Bring my thesaurus and paper.
Man, I ain't got time for this.
Before you go, can we...
can we discuss the fee?
The fee?
How much I owe you?
20?
You... man, you smoking rocks?
Who the...
15 for this Santa
Claus a*s letter?
You crazy, man.
Okay, okay, 10, but that's it.
I'm not a welfare recipient.
10?
You take credit card?
I prefer cash.
Man, I don't carry...
I'm not a rapper.
I don't care that
kind of money on me.
Strippers do.
I'm just calling the people.
I ain't got time for this, man.
Okay, five, but that's it.
Five?
All right.
I'ma go run to the bank.
I'll be right back.
There you go right there.
I see it right there.
Yeah.
Oh, $5.
Oh.
Yeah.
Here.
Here.
I got you.
Here you go.
Do your thing.
- Do you want a receipt?
- No.
I'm so good.
Keep the change.
Don't ever call me again.
Esther.
[rap music]
Look stacks of hundreds
About to throw it
Don't be teasing, baby
Show it
You're a freak
Yeah, I know it
Yeah, I know it
Yeah
See, my people got the pole
And he ain't
even at the show
Preaching I'ma blow it
This place was definitely
not on the agreements.
No, but it's a good place to
find what we're looking for.
Last-ditch effort, huh?
- I appreciate you coming.
- Mm-hmm.
And I had to try.
I had to.
[horn]
- Oh.
Oh.
- Here we go.
- They are aggressive.
- Oh, my gosh.
Sit down.
Sit down.
Just sit down.
Sit down.
Babe, there's money
stuck on my shoe.
Pick it up.
Pick it up.
Sneak pick it up.
Hi.
Oh.
Hi.
What's up?
Oh, you are right.
You are right.
This is the perfect place.
Hey, man, no disrespect, but
you ain't on the type of time
we are, so you can go
ahead and just move on.
Is it the nipple rings?
No, it's the p*nis.
We don't do that.
We ain't swinging.
It's just... this the
only d*ck in the room.
I'm not leaving in two minutes.
You don't have to.
You can chill.
You can go on.
Move on.
So what the f*ck is going on?
I don't know, but he's still
there, and he hasn't moved.
Yeah, he's still there.
You guys like the burritos here?
Oh, are they good?
Hey, we should try one.
- No, baby.
You are lactose intolerant.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, I'm lac... I can't do it.
You too?
Yeah, man.
I'm lactose.
I'll tell you guys what, if I
eat one single slice of cheese,
I blow O rings.
Oof.
Oof.
Don't ever use no words
that start with O again, ever.
[horn]
- Yes.
It's blowing out
of both ends, babe.
Did you just sh*t
yourself right now?
Woof.
Okay, goodbye.
Thank God.
Hey, I admit, babe, we
still have a rocky start,
but it's uphill from here.
[laughter]
You're right.
Babe... two for two.
The hell is this m*therf*cker...
he's got that black
Mexican wrestler...
hey.
Look, man, before
you even start,
you ain't even got to start.
Hey, Dennis.
You know me.
- Frank.
[laughter]
Man, what the hell
you got on, man?
That's my lawyer, man.
Frank Mann, attorney at law.
Gimpy is your lawyer?
Oh, yes.
Yes.
I've been representing
Dennis here on some contract.
- Shh. Shh. Shh. Shh.
- Oh. Oh.
Well, do tell, Gimpy Esquire.
[horn]
Oh, look at the time.
- No, no, no, no.
- What?
You stay.
You stay.
You stop talking.
That ain't how
speed dating goes.
Continue.
Now, you do know that I am bound
by client-attorney privilege.
I just can't tell you
whatever you want.
What he's trying to
say is I had him make
an amendment to the contract.
Why?
You know why, because you
tried to manipulate a loophole.
All I did was use the language
in the contract, Dennis.
No, you tried to
manipulate a loophole.
And that's childish,
and inconsiderate,
and disrespectful.
Oh.
Is that what we're doing
in front of company?
As your attorney, I don't think
you should utter another word.
I ain't going to
say nothing else.
Yeah.
I ain't going to say nothing
else because she trippin'.
I can get loud too.
As your wife, I would
suggest that you
listen to your attorney, your
professional, gimpy attorney.
See you tomorrow night.
Where you going?
Hey, baby, baby, baby.
- Bye, Mark.
Sorry this couldn't work out.
Baby.
Hey, I'ma call you...
I'm going to call you Gimpy...
Frank, whatever it is.
Hey, baby.
Hey, Frank.
Hey, buddy.
You think... having
burritos today?
[hip hop music]
What the hell?
What the f*ck?
You look nice.
You strike.
Dark chocolate.
Look at that.
Oh, I like me some chocolate.
Look at you.
How you doing?
Hello.
Yeah, Johnny Gill
would be proud.
My, my, my.
Steven.
Okay.
Dennis, right?
Big D. Big D's a popular name.
Hey, man, don't look at me like
that because tonight... listen.
No, listen.
You got to clear your mind, man.
Don't forget about the
no h*m*, the pose g*ng.
Tonight, you have to
prepare your mind,
your body, and your wife to
be entangled with another man.
Now, see, normally when
I do things like this,
I want to get right straight
to it, something stiff and hard
like a b*llet, you
know, bourbon whiskey.
But I decided to bring a nice
little bottle of wine instead.
Nice choice.
Thank you.
Speaking of choices,
besides this choice here...
[sniffs] Mm-hmm.
It smells like chicken.
Is that chicken?
Indeed, it is.
It is.
I bet it's succulent,
juicy, tender,
and just falls off
the bone, don't it?
Yeah.
You know, but before
it gets too awkward,
let's go suck on some of
your wife's meat, man.
I'm a breasts man myself.
Come on, man.
There's no way
you can make this.
That's insane.
It's no way you
can make this, dog.
I just whooped your
a*s for the whole game.
Man, whooped my a*s?
Bro, just go ahead and sh**t.
You want to make it double
or nothing on this shot?
Just go ahead.
Just go ahead and sh**t.
Double or nothing on the shot.
Hey. Yo.
What the f*ck, yo?
[laughter]
You dumb asses are just going
to sit here and let your boy
ruin his marriage?
Look, he's a
grown a*s man, okay?
He made his choice.
Now, your girl,
she's over there.
And this is her fault.
I know.
And it was dumb as hell.
Okay, so why didn't
you tell her?
- I did.
- Okay.
And why didn't
she listen to you?
I give horrible advice.
She never listens to me.
No, that's true.
You do give some
shitty a*s advice.
Okay.
You know what?
You remember that
time you told Jackie she
should break up with Harold?
Yeah, he was smoking weed all
day and playing video games.
And he's, like, a
billionaire game developer now.
She's a regional
manager at a shoe store.
Shoe store.
Bert and Ernie, can we go now?
- Coming in to f*ck up the day.
- Hey.
Hey.
You owe me money, bro.
I kicked your a*s.
- Bro, come on.
That's bullshit, man.
[upbeat music]
Yeah, I knew it was sucking.
I could suck on this for hours
with you, woman like that.
Mm, mm, mm.
So Anna, you're an attorney.
Yes, corporate.
Huh.
Interesting.
Yeah.
And Big D, engineer, huh?
Engineer and mechanical.
Okay.
All right.
Cool.
Like Tony Stark, huh?
- Something like that.
- Something like that.
Yeah.
So Steven, tell us a
little bit about you.
Sure.
Yeah, tell us about
you being a gigolo.
[laughter]
Wow.
I never heard that term
in a long time, man.
So sorry.
No, no, no.
He just took me back, you know?
That's my favorite
R. Kelly song, man.
- So sorry.
- No, no, no.
It's okay because it's hard
for a heterosexual man,
you know, to see his wife with
another man for the first time
and to be with another
man for the first time.
You know, that's...
that's really hard.
Or not, or not,
because you can still
have a heterosexual
threesome without the two men
having sexual
interaction, you know?
But it's still hard
to prepare for that,
for him to see his wife
sucking another man's d*ck.
So it comes with a lot of
trepidations, you know?
But to answer your
question, no, I'm a sex
coach and a holistic healer.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Now, that... that
sounds interesting.
Sounds like a long
way of saying gigolo.
You see?
You see?
The chakras aren't lining up.
The energy is off.
This entanglement is not
entangling, so I'm going to...
I'm going to get up
out of here because I
don't want any trouble.
All right?
Steven.
Please, we need you.
This man can't handle it.
I don't want to be in
the middle of y'all, okay?
- But Steven, please.
- No, look. Look. Look.
Look.
- Please stay.
We really need you
to stay, please.
It's hard to say
no to you, Chocolate.
All right.
Where's your bedroom?
[romantic music]
[suspenseful music]
[phone ringing]
He's not answering.
No, he's not picking up either.
Call Anna.
[phone ringing]
b*tch.
She's not answering either.
[tires screeching]
God damn, woman.
You a getaway driver
in your past life?
Calm down.
- You cannot drive like this.
- Why?
Because...
You're going to get car sick?
Not me.
Oh, hell... oh, no, no, no.
[panicking]
[tires screeching]
- Hold on.
Hold on.
[beep]
[rock music]
Is he kissing you?
Baby, just pay attention.
I need time for this year.
Hey, bro.
He's wilding.
Did this n*gga get his bare
feet on my f*cking bed?
Good energy.
Good energy.
Energy.
Come on, champ.
- Come on what?
- Babe.
- f*ck no.
Together?
Want to do it together?
No the f*ck we can't.
Come on.
- God.
- Come on, baby.
Good energy.
Ain't no come on energy my a*s.
You can have that n*gga.
I'm...
No.
Come on.
No.
Good energy.
This n*gga crazy.
[upbeat music]
You know, Marvin
Gaye got it right.
Sexual healing.
Wow.
Hey, Eva.
I hope you're happy, man.
- Excuse me, young man?
- Excuse me, young man?
You know what's going on.
Our friend's f*cking
marriage is ruined, man.
I highly doubt that.
If you pulled out of your pants
what I know you pulled
out, she's ruined.
I thought you knew
I don't pull out.
But no, no, no.
Listen.
Listen.
Listen.
[distant moaning]
See that?
- That's disgusting.
Just needed a pep talk,
a little starter p*stol action,
a little battery in the back.
Speaking of putting
things in our backs,
can I get a ride with you?
I need a little ride home.
Well, you know I drive stick.
Well, you're going to
need all six gears for this.
That's what I'm talking about.
Hey.
Hold up. Hold up.
Ms. Stick, what about us?
- Oh.
Uber.
Uber.
Oh, you're just going
to leave us for some d*ck?
Figure it out.
Put your seatbelt on.
She got six kids, bro.
The hole is like this, bro.
Like that.
It's going to be like that
after she sit on that sh*t.
[distant moaning]
Sexual healing.
I should head out.
It's getting kind
of weird for me.
It's loud.
Loud as sh*t.
It's like... it's like
listening to your parents
f*ck, bro.
You heard your
parents f*ck before?
Every night when I was seven.
Why?
My parents were freaks, man.
Like... Okay.
Nasty sh*t too.
[upbeat music]
Hey.
I smell special pancakes.
I don't know how you got
the strength and energy.
What you make, babe?
Oh, hey.
- Hey.
- Baby, where you at?
Baby?
Where you at?
Where is my baby?
[indistinct]
There go my baby.
Here's my baby.
Love you always and forever.
You know what?
Hey, f*ck work.
Let's just get out and hang out.
And why don't we just
chill here, play hooky,
and just f*ck everywhere?
[laughter]
All I need is five minutes.
- Come on.
You had more than five
minutes last night.
Okay.
I love my... Okay.
This is a good one?
[banging on door]
What the hell?
Hold on.
Hold on.
Just give me one
second at the door.
Go.
Go.
Go.
Get rid of that person.
Go upstairs and get in bed.
I'm taking these pillows.
You know I like to
be right on top.
Open up, Dennis.
I finally nailed that amendment.
What we got here?
Yeah, everything's perfect.
I am so glad to hear that.
But I won't be needing it, man.
I'm good.
We're good.
I'm good.
She's good.
We're good.
Yeah, she's happy.
I'm happy.
No need for a contract.
This is the perfect
relationship,
so you can skedaddle.
Fine.
I guess, I'm glad to hear that.
Yeah.
Yeah, man.
I appreciate it.
Look, you know, love is
a very rare thing, Denny.
I mean, it's not always...
it never is a typical boy meets
girl thing, not for most of us.
Uh-huh.
I mean, sometimes,
you know... you get lucky
to have somebody who
has the heart to really
give you the true love.
Then when you lose it, it's
a pain worse than death.
Damn.
Did you lose somebody, man?
Maria.
She was one in a million.
She took care of me and mom.
It was my honor to take
care of her until the end.
Damn.
I'm sorry to hear
about that, Frank.
I really am.
But I appreciate you, though.
You've got one in a million.
Yeah.
You went through... you
went through slings.
You went through arrows.
You went through penises.
No, I didn't.
No.
That's your type of sh*t.
- Okay.
No judgment.
No judgment.
But you did it all for love.
That's got to count
for something.
For sure.
But I appreciate you, Frank.
Just... hey, when you
go out, make sure you
lock the door for me, man.
I love you.
You can keep the deposit.
[upbeat music]
Just the chiquita
I was hoping to see.
You think you're so
special, don't you?
Too good for us mere mortals?
You think the sun rises
out of that halfwits a*s.
I don't get it.
Seriously, I'm not in the
mood for your bullshit, okay?
Oh.
Maybe I could get
you in the mood,
you know, with some sage
oils and a packet of ribbed...
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
[screaming]
You are so f*cking fired.
Don't act like you've
never been burned down there,
you creep.
Dad.
Dad.
She just assaulted me.
I was looking for you, son.
I have formal complaints from
Sherry, Lori, Emma in payroll,
and Carmen in transportation.
Wow.
Really?
Carmen?
I know she's in a walker, but...
That's enough.
Come on, Dad.
We're going to address
these allegations.
And then I want you, son,
to clear out your desk.
What?
Finish up what
you're doing, Anna.
And get back to
work for me, okay?
Of course.
Of course, sir.
Yes, of course.
Son.
Come on, guys.
Guys?
Carmen?
Baby.
[dramatic music]
Godspeed.
[upbeat music]
And we welcome
our newest partners
of the firm, Anna Ana Nicole.
[applause]
[indistinct conversation]
[cheering]
[indistinct conversation]
[happy music]
[vomiting]
Oh, sh*t.
[suspenseful music]
You okay, baby?
Mm-hmm.
Yo.
Yo.
Yes.
My d*ck work.
My d*ck work.
[upbeat music]
I always find
interesting ways to address
somebody's daughter.
You know what I'm saying?
[rap music]
You know, something like...
I need a dime to fight with
About stuff in Bottega,
Prada, and Saint Laurent
I need a dime to fight with
Face down in my lap
Only time she sleeps
with the tongue
I need a dime to fight with
She down to hold the strap
When I slide with
it through the slum
I need a dime to fight with
Yeah
So I'ma be a player
till I find me one
Yeah
To be loved
To be loved
We light as Prince Hakeem
Send me by my nuts
Sitting inside my truck
Bumping something about
me that's unreleased
Nothing sweet
so back back and
Give me 50, boy
Like the younger
me, couple freaks
Wifey and the main hoe
Is it game?
No
I'm transparent
like a rainbow
They love my confidence
The goals that I
have accomplished big
My exes looking for closure
I told her buy a wig
I've probably
been the emperor
When?
In my former life
Million dollars
for the signature
I've been at
your [indistinct]
For them stormy nights
Left me out
Now my heart is frigid
And my thoughts invisible
I'm dodging prison
plus federal seats
Back and forth
from H-Town to LA
Trevor Ariza
Negative people, I despise
Shorty told me that I'm
never going to leave you
Hope she's laughing
I need a dime to fight with
About stuff in Bottega,
Prada, and Saint Laurent
I need a dime to fight with
Yeah, face down in my lap
Only time she sleep
with the tongue
I need a dime to fight with
She's down to
hold the strap
When I slide with
it through the slums
I need a dime to fight with
Yeah
So I'ma be a player
till I find me one
Look, I need a chick
That ain't constantly
on the ground
Double tapping all in
other people's business
Instead she got an LLC
Just this much paper
It's me
And her head game
always be consistent
She keep the
[indistinct] and the tote
Her knee high boots
match the Fendi coat
I want to pull her hair
But first we finna smoke
So she gave me sloppy
While I twist this dope
Then I made the box stream
Fire Stick remote
Hop up then I go,
but shorty understands
Why?
She knows I move different
See, I got 99 problems
that don't include women
I got to watch you
I kick it
We keep a cool distance
Birds of a feather
And lots of these
n*gg*s stool pigeons
Who isn't... who isn't
really these days?
Act like they a dog
But they really strays
I'm outside trying
to feel these places
Then make it home
So I don't need a girl
That's going to be
blowing up my phone
I need a dime to fight with
Bout stuff in Bottega,
Prada, and Saint Laurent
I need a dime to fight with
Face down in my lap
Only time she sleep
with the tongue
I need a dime to fight with
She's down to
hold the strap
When I slide with
it through the slums
I need a dime to fight with
So I'ma be a player
till I find me one
You know, I really don't pay
attention when a player speaks.
Nod your head if you understand.
Yeah.
That's a good girl.
So I'ma be a player
till I find me one
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