♪ ♪
[Woman]: Have those
printed out on my desk.
Mm-hmm. I'll be in in an hour.
Oh, I need to go
over the layouts
with the art department as well.
Yep. Same time as usual.
Uh-huh.
Yeah.
Okay.
Did you get my memo on
the testing results?
The tea caddy's gonna
be huge this year!
Coffee's king, but tea's
trending this season,
which reminds me,
I still have a lot
of serious concerns
about that lemon squeezer.
Uh-huh.
All right, we're all set to
finalize the catalogue...
It's black, white, touch of red.
Classic, but a little
bit of whimsy.
Uh-huh?
Okay, well then, what
time is the meeting?
Well, cancel it.
We're gonna have to
work through lunch.
Uh-huh.
So what did the memo say?
We're going to feature
the chafing dish
with the Brussels sprouts.
Because Brussels sprouts
are the new asparagus.
Alright.
No. No! That is not
what my father said.
We're gonna lead with the
electric pepper grinder.
Mm-hmm.
Okay. We still need to deal
with the cheese-slicer issue.
Perfect.
Thank you! Enjoy.
Cheddar's out. Jarlsburg's in.
Swiss, yes. I'm sorry.
Um... sorry.
Sorry. Can I...
One second. Yep.
Swiss, yes. Colby, no.
Havarti's the new parmesan.
Well, don't stop there.
What about cheez whiz?
Gridley?
Josie?
I'm gonna have to call you back.
Hi!
Hi!
Um, how long has it been?
Uh...
- High school?
- Yeah!
Oh, it's been, like, a
million years since... prom!
Uh, yeah!
- Oh! No...
- Oh! No.
- Yeah...
- Ugh.
Ah, I can still see
your parents' faces
when I opened that door.
Yeah, well, I'm still seeing you
in your shiny green tux.
It was festive!
It was pretty green.
Well, I can still see you
at the top of the stairs.
You had that sparkly dress
and your hair all...
- whatever...
- Big. Really big.
Whatever you call it,
with the flowers.
You were the prettiest
girl I'd ever seen.
Thanks.
What happened to you? You
really let yourself go.
Yeah. [Chuckles]
So I've heard all these
stories about you,
just traveling, all
over the place.
What are you doing
back here in the city?
- You remember Teddy?
- Yeah.
From high school?
Teddy who sat behind
me in algebra?
Yeah, so he sold
his tech company,
and I'm house-sitting
while he's in California.
Six months free rent,
plus valet parking.
Then I find a place of my own.
And I see, in the meantime,
you're dealing in driftwood.
Yes. Driftwood is
the new plywood.
Is it?
When they sell, I
do pretty well.
These are really amazing.
Thank you. And you're
running a corporate empire?
No, still working for my dad
at Mayfield's.
Oh, I just bought
one of your spoons.
Did you? Pasta? Salad?
I have no idea,
but it makes a
great minute-hand.
- That is pasta...
- Salad? Pasta.
It's pasta.
What is this? A sundial?
Yep. It's, uh, 7:30-ish.
Well, that's... I mean,
it's really 7:20.
Yeah, your watch says 7:30.
I set it 10 minutes
early, so I'm not late.
Why not 15?
Because that would be neurotic?
Mm. Funny.
I'm gonna go,
but would you like
to share contacts?
I don't have a phone.
- Okay...
- Anywhere.
But if you got a pen,
I'll write it on my hand.
- I definitely don't have a pen.
- Yes.
Are you gonna be here tomorrow?
Low tide all week.
Great. I will see you tomorrow.
- Alright.
- Behave yourself.
No promises. Hey!
Let me know how that
cheese thing turns out!
Pasta!
You're kidding me.
Greetings. I'm Josie Mayfield.
founded Mayfield's
right here in my
mother's kitchen.
Since then, the name Mayfield's
has been synonymous
with cookware,
bakeware, wooden spoons...
And this year, we are
thrilled to introduce
our new Mayfield's tea line
and lemon squeezer.
Ouch!
[Chuckles] Uh... ha.
Okay. Well.
Obviously, we will reshoot
the lemon mishap,
but you get the idea.
And I look at this as a
two-pronged approach...
We have a weekly video blog,
and a way to introduce
our customers
to new, exciting products.
Such as...
The Mayfield's home sodamaker...
For the serious soda aficionado.
Mayfield's is about
coffee and tea, not soda.
Yes, sir, I know,
but the 18 to 49-year-old male
is not drinking earl grey
while watching Monday
night football.
Josie, do you know why.
Mayfield's is still in business?
Yes, because we stay the course
and give the customers
what they expect.
- Exactly.
- We're not growing, dad.
We're not shrinking either.
[Sighs] Fine. Alright.
The reps are in. I
will handle them.
Francis in accounting
just had her baby,
so we sent her a very
nice gift basket
with a Mayfield bottle-warmer.
And the product testing
for the cheese-slicer.
Is tomorrow, that does it.
Not quite. You are coming home
for the party this weekend?
- Of course.
- Alone?
No. I'm bringing Richard.
Oh, I see.
Daddy, what is wrong
with Richard?
He's the perfect man.
On paper, yes.
He's... ambitious.
You love ambitious.
He talks too fast.
Really?
Alright, I don't know, exactly,
but there's just
something about him.
Fine. Is there anyone
I could bring home
that you would approve of?
I guess you're just
still my little girl.
Janet, where are those reports?
The client's been
waiting since Monday.
Hey. What are you doing here?
- I missed you.
- Mm-hmm?
And?
And I need five minutes
with your father.
He's not returning my calls.
Richard...
I know, but this
client's a perfect fit.
MBA from Penn, 10
years at P&G...
He could run Mayfield's
foreign sales
with his eyes closed,
and he speaks mandarin.
Trust me... The only mandarin
my father cares about
is "moo shoo pork."
Just put us in a room.
You have his ear.
I have his DNA.
And you two have been
in a room together.
It did not go well. I really
want him to like you.
He will!
No, he won't, if you
keep pitching him.
Plus, he thinks
you're a fast-talker.
What's wrong with talking fast?
Fast-talkers are untrustworthy.
I'll wear him down. You'll see.
What, like water
erodes a mountain?
Exactly.
You do know that takes
billions of years?
- I can wait.
- [Sighs]
Dinner tonight?
Uh, clients. Breakfast tomorrow?
Uh, reps. How about lunch?
Can't. Tied up all day.
Day after looks good.
Oh. 12:30? 1:00.
- Bye.
- Bye.
♪ ♪
This placement's not
a walk in the park.
We're not gonna get this
guy in a lateral hire.
He's got options.
Well, what do you want
me to say to you?
I'll call you back.
[Whacking all the buttons]
♪ ♪
Mr. Mayfield. Richard.
Richard Wright of
Wright, Silver,
and Gumm Executive Search...
Your daughter's boyfriend?
Yes. I remember.
Did you press all
of those buttons?
No, sir... some kid
must have been in here.
But while we're trapped in here,
I'd like to run
something by you.
♪ ♪
[Elevator doors ding]
So how's next week
looking for you?
Um...
Another time, then?
♪ ♪
Well, her invites are ecru,
so she'd like the napkins
to be the same color.
Alright, just please
remember the dessert forks,
sterling only.
Thank you.
Coronation?
Close. My parents are having
a party this weekend.
It's their 40th
wedding anniversary
wow! Congrats.
Send them my best.
Yeah.
On second thought,
why ruin their day?
[Laughs] What are
you making here?
I'm thinking camel.
Oh. Camels don't really sell.
Uh, donkey?
Ooh. Political connotations.
You don't want to
limit your clientele.
Alright. How about a horse?
Yes! Yes. Horses
are the number-four
favorite animal,
after dogs, cats, and dolphins.
Then a horse it is! Giddy-up.
Mm-hmm.
You know what? My boyfriend's
partners play polo.
This might look really nice
in their reception area.
You have a boyfriend?
Yeah.
Are you seeing somebody?
Not at the moment.
So...
Who's the lucky guy?
Ooh. Thank you. He is an
executive headhunter.
Ouch.
And what do your folks
think of this boyfriend?
Mm, you know my dad,
he doesn't think anybody's
good enough for me.
I know he didn't think I
was good enough for you.
Don't feel bad.
Richard has everything that's
on my father's checklist,
and he still doesn't approve.
Ah... the Mayfield checklist!
Good job, good family,
good manners.
Goodbye.
Pretty much.
Well, I'm just gonna
come out and say it.
You know why your dad's
repulsed by this guy?
I never said he was repulsed!
Look, it's his job.
No father wants his daughter
dating a cannibal in a suit.
He's not a cannibal.
He is a headhunter.
What's the difference?
Richard places clients
in employment positions,
and a cannibal chops people
up and eats them for dinner.
Tomato, tom-ah-to.
Hey!
Hey! Hey-hey-hey!
That's my minute-hand!
It's okay!
I'll get you another one.
I'll hold you to it.
[Laughs] Okay.
♪ ♪
Hello. This is Josie Mayfield.
Please leave a message.
[Machine beeps]
Josie, it's your mother.
I hope you're not bringing
that Richard person
to the party.
Your father had a most
uncomfortable incident
with him in the
elevator yesterday.
At any rate, get back to me
as soon as you can, dear.
[TV playing quietly]
Dad, you should go to bed.
You look tired.
♪ ♪
You're micro-shuffling again.
How else is this place
going to get in shape?
Claire, there's not a
napkin out of place.
There hasn't been in years.
Please. Just sit.
Rex, dear. Come.
[Slapping knees]
Rex.
Come.
Mindy's coming in tomorrow.
You do recall you
have two daughters?
When Mindy wants to
join the company,
I will muster more enthusiasm.
For heaven's sake...
Let the girl finish
college in peace.
She's been there for five years.
Josie finished in three.
Yes, dear. I know. I
was at the graduation.
♪ ♪
I just talked a little
business, that's all.
I spoke slowly.
He doesn't trust people
who speak slowly!
I thought he didn't trust
people who speak fast.
He doesn't! Honey.
Can we just keep
our relationship
separate from
Mayfield's business?
You're right. I'm sorry.
I thought we were
going to lunch?
We are, but first, I want you
to see a driftwood horse.
What?
I ran into a friend of mine
and I would like to buy
one of his sculptures
for your office.
Please! Just indulge me.
He's an old friend
from high school,
and I want to help him.
Why?
Because we were good friends.
You know?
We did all the nerdy
little clubs together,
like glee club and
prom decorating,
and he seems a bit lost.
Uh-huh.
Uh-oh. You'll lose your
head there, buddy.
Hi!
Hey. Corporate
takeover at the park?
Gridley, this is Richard,
Richard, this is Gridley.
Richard Wright.
Ah. So you are Mr.
"Right," literally.
Good to meet you.
You as well.
Oh.
So you two were friends?
Yep! Old friends.
Maplewood High.
Yeah, not to mention we
went to prom together.
Uh, sun tea, anyone? Fresh jug.
Actually, we're just
on our way to lunch.
But I wanted to Richard
to see your horse.
Right. About that...
I know you said
camels don't sell,
but I had to listen to my gut,
and my gut just said...
- Camel?
- Camel. Said "camel."
Now the only question is...
Dromedary, or...
- Bactrian?
- Bactrian. It's more dramatic.
Alright, well, now
that that's settled,
you kids ready for the
big anniversary weekend?
- Oh!
- Oh, by the way...
Do not wear a green tux.
They hate that.
Thanks for the tip, but
I'm actually not going.
My parents are being my parents.
Ah, well, don't
take it personally.
Mr. M gives all Josie's
boyfriends a rough time.
I mean, I probably
won't even go,
so it's fine.
Well, if you don't go,
they'll blame Richard.
There's no coming
back from that.
True. That is a lose/lose.
Well, we should head off.
Good luck with the, uh...
The camel.
Alright. Thank you.
Ooh! For you.
What's this?
The pasta and the salad spoon!
Thank you.
You're welcome.
Now I can add a second-hand!
[Laughing] Good luck.
I got it!
I got it!
Hey. What are you
doing this weekend?
Well, I'd have to
check my schedule.
Uh...
I'm wide open.
You know what would
make your parents
roll out the welcome mat for me?
Him.
What?
Bring him to the party.
I mean, your parents think
that there's somebody
better out there for you.
What if they see that
there's someone worse?
No offense.
Uh, none taken.
That's a terrible idea, Richard.
Uh, well, actually,
to be honest, it's kind
of a brilliant idea.
I mean, Mr. and Mrs. M
probably still hate me.
[Laughs] After a
weekend with him,
they'll think that I'm a prince.
Okay. I'm uncomfortable
with this,
and that's a bad
position to put you in.
Yeah, you're right, I don't...
Okay. Just a thought.
Okay.
- Bye.
- Bye.
[Richard]: So where do you
want to go for lunch?
Oh, I know this great new place.
You know what?
I'll do it.
Yeah?
Yeah!
Hey. Anything to help
you lovebirds out.
Alright! Well, we owe you.
What's this?
This is gas money.
It's a long drive.
Oh, no, no. My truck
runs on vegetable oil.
Converted it with a kit.
For vegetable oil, then.
No, I get a free supply
from the Chinese food place
across the street. Thank you.
Okay.
Are you sure you're
okay with this?
When do we leave?
♪ ♪
[Josie]: We're going to need
more testing on the sodamaker.
Well, it's just not up
to our standards yet.
Sorry about that.
[Gridley]: Boy, it
never stops, does it?
[Josie]: That is family
business for you.
We have to make it perfect
if it has the Mayfield name.
[Gridley]: Personal sodamaker?
Sounds expensive.
You know, you can buy
soda at the dollar store.
[Josie]: Well, I'm
sure it's not as good.
[Gridley]: No! It's terrible,
but it's a dollar.
[Josie]: Our target
market can afford it.
[Gridley]: So how is it
working for your dad?
[Josie]: You know,
the less things change, the
more they stay insane.
[Gridley]: Change is good.
[Josie]: Sometimes.
[Gridley]: It will buy
you a bottle of soda.
[Josie]: Touche.
Thanks again for
coming this weekend.
[Gridley]: My pleasure.
[Josie]: We owe you.
[Gridley]: Ah, what
are friends for?
[Car horn honks]
♪ ♪
Are you ready for this?
Absolutely.
We're here!
Hello, dear!
- Hi, daddy.
- Hello, sweetheart.
Mr. and Mrs. M.
- Happy 50th!
- 40th!
Well, 30, 40, 50...
The main thing is,
you're still together,
and so happy.
Who's this?
You remember Gridley,
from high school?
Yes.
Vividly.
[Chuckles weakly]
- Ah!
- Uh-uh.
Uh...
How do you want to
handle this, Mr. M?
Handshake?
High-five? Knuckle-bump?
Handshake. Um...
Your vehicle, it's,
um, it's leaking oil.
Ahh. Well, no worries.
It's vegetable oil.
A good hosing'll
wash that right off.
Something smells
like Chinese food.
Oh, yeah. That might be me.
Nan-king gardens... Good call.
Well, we appreciate you
bringing Josie home.
Can I get you a glass of
water before you leave?
Oh, no, mother,
he's not leaving.
He's staying for the weekend.
I don't understand.
He's my plus-one.
♪ ♪
Ugh. What is this?
We thought you were still
seeing that "Richard" person.
You didn't approve of Richard,
so I started seeing
other people.
He's on the back
burner for right now.
And Maxwell Gridley is
on the front burner?
Yes. I ran into him while
I was out jogging,
and we have a history
together, he makes me laugh!
He has a very contagious
outlook on life.
Let's hope that's all
that's contagious.
♪ ♪
Mindy?
Gridley?
[Laughs]
Ah!
Hey!
Look at you all grown-up!
You look great!
Oh, you need your eyes checked.
Nah. I'm 20/20.
Are you and Josie, like...
Ah, yes and no.
More "no."
You just getting here?
I wish. Just running errands
for mother superior.
What is that, a weapon?
"Grape scissors."
Ah... crucial.
Okay. Does the driveway
smell like Chinese food?
[Sighs] Come on.
Hiya, sis!
[Overlapping]: Hey!
Hi!
Honey, you look so good!
Guess who's in town?
Wade Wilson!
- Did you talk to him?
- No, I can't!
Invite him to the party.
Mom would be furious. You know
how she feels about the Wilsons.
So?
Besides, he wouldn't come.
Mrs. M, this place...
It's even better
than I remember.
Oh, wow!
Uh, don't touch that, please.
It's expensive.
It's Faberge.
- Oh.
- Dad gave that to mom...
for their first
wedding anniversary.
Our second anniversary.
Our first anniversary,
we were poor.
Well, poor in money,
rich in love.
Something like that.
Hey, who's this?
He's new.
Rex, come.
Rex?
Come!
Come!
Rex... come!
[Sighs] He doesn't like people.
Oh!
Hey, fella.
There you are.
Oh, that's a good boy.
Hi, Rex.
Hi. Oh!
Hey, fella.
[Television game show
playing quietly]
Gridley, you remember
my grandfather, right?
Yes! Of course.
How are you, sir?
You took me fishing
once, remember?
[TV program continues]
Oh, I love this show!
He doesn't speak.
It's been almost two years now.
Oh? Cool...
Like a vow of silence?
Dementia.
Oh! [Chuckles]
Well, who doesn't
have a touch of that?
[TV host]: "Which overweight U.S.
president got stuck"
in the presidential bathtub?"
Oh! I know this. I know this...
- [Game show buzzer blares]
- It's, um...
Wait! Yeah!
William Howard Taft.
Everyone.
I have a thrilling announcement.
It appears patience and hard
work really do pay off.
The Mayfield house has secured
the coveted "beautiful
homes" page
in this Sunday's Chronicle!
Kudos, Mrs. M!
Mom, that is so great.
[Mindy]: Yeah. You've
wanted that forever.
[Mumbling]: Or at least since
the Wilsons' house was selected.
There you go.
The Wilsons, huh?
They still live next door?
Unfortunately.
He doesn't drink.
[Scoffs]
Well, at any rate,
the photographer will
be here tomorrow night
to sh**t the party.
And it goes without saying,
everything has to look perfect.
And when hasn't it?
Thank you, dear.
To the Mayfields!
To the Chronicle.
To Josie and Gridley.
[Glasses clinking]
Mm! I almost forgot.
I brought presents.
That isn't necessary.
Ah...
Hey, this really
isn't necessary.
Ah, it's no problem.
Alright!
Mindy...
This is for welcoming me
so warmly into your home.
Sir.
I remembered how
much you liked hats.
That's your favorite
color, if I recall?
Thanks, Gridley.
Go on. I think you're
gonna like it.
I know you love the canines.
[Weeps]
Oh... he looks
exactly like Prince.
[Weeping]
Who's Prince?
It's her favorite dog.
He died last year.
Oh, that's terrible! Should I...
- No.
- [Sighs]
Oh, uh... [chuckles]
Bet you haven't seen one
of those in a while, huh?
No, I haven't.
Quite unexpected.
[Sniffing]
Hey, come on over here. Come on.
That's a good boy.
Mrs. M, I am so
sorry about Prince.
Let's just not talk
about it, shall we?
Come on. Let go.
[Both yelping and gasping]
[Thump]
I am so sorry! I'll clean it up.
[Huffs]: No! I've got it!
And take off that
ridiculous hat.
♪ ♪
[Mortified gasp]
Look what he's done to you!
[Gasps]
I rented a tux in
that color once.
Yes. We remember.
I think it looks festive.
Go wash that out right now.
Can you please
give us a moment alone
with our daughter?
Of course.
And don't touch
anything in there!
It's for the party.
Roger that.
What were you thinking,
bringing him here?
I don't even have
a word for him!
Well, I'm sure
you'll think of one.
It's a "big-mouth bass."
For the fisherman in all of us.
May I?
[Recorded singing plays]
♪ Way down upon the
Swanee River ♪
♪ Far, far away ♪
[yelps]
Well, let's begin, shall we?
Bon appetit.
Well, I don't know
about anyone else,
but I could eat a horse.
Or a camel.
I thought I told you
to wash that out?
I tried, it wouldn't come out.
Well, it better not
look like that tomorrow night
when the photographer gets here.
It's not the end of
the world, Claire.
Maxwell?
I assume you have appropriate
attire for the party
tomorrow night?
Don't worry, Mrs. M I
won't embarrass you.
Learned that lesson at prom.
Nevertheless, Mr. Mayfield will
lend you a jacket and a tie.
Ooh! Quite the selection.
You will have 30 dark suits
and 30 matching ties
to choose from.
Your father has always
been a creature of habit,
haven't you, dear?
Not always.
Well, this chicken is fantastic.
It's cornish game hen.
It's a bit dry.
It's like I always make it.
Yes. It is.
Tell me, Maxwell, what exactly
do you do for a living?
- And the inquisition begins.
- Well, to be honest...
there aren't enough
hours in the day
to do everything I'd like to do.
And what might those things be?
Gridley works with
driftwood, dad.
There's a living in that?
Well, my income ebbs and
flows with the tide.
Just like our business, dad.
But I can't say enough good
things about driftwood.
It's got character, it won't rot, and...
it's free!
Of course, I do have
other ventures.
Topiary. And I teach
water aerobics at the
community center
on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
Driftwood, topiary
and water aerobics.
Hmm. It appears you're
a triple-threat.
Thank you.
Mindy... do you
really need that?
Don't put it back. You've
already touched it.
There's more for you
and me, gramps.
Maxwell, you'll be staying
in the yellow room tonight.
The yellow room? Where's that?
It is as far from my
bedroom as possible,
without being outdoors.
♪ ♪
I don't know what in the
world she sees in him.
I should never have told her
that I didn't like Richard.
Oh! Richard's a dream
compared to this one.
♪ ♪
Okay, so what is going on
with you and Gridley?
I have to be honest with you,
out of all the guys that
you ever brought home,
he's the only one that
I ever really liked.
Alright, I'm gonna
tell you something,
but you do not say a
word to mom and dad.
Are we clear?
- Mm-hmm.
- Okay.
He's just here to make
Richard look better.
What?
He's doing me a favor. You
know how mom and dad are.
You're really gonna
like Richard.
Okay, well, uh...
What is he like?
Well, he's sharp
and really driven,
and good-looking.
So... he's you.
[Sighs]
Definitely yellow.
Oh, there's nothin'
to see in there, pal,
but I did bring you
a little treat from
the dinner table.
Come here!
There you go.
I think today went pretty well.
Sort of.
I mean, as long
as Josie's happy,
I'm golden, right?
What do you think, Rex?
Did I pull it off?
Oh! You're easy.
♪ ♪
Oh, dear.
Is one of your daughters
dating a handyman?
I hear your son's in town.
I hope he hasn't
flunked out already.
Quite the opposite. He's a
perfect fit for an Ivy.
Joseph went to Yale.
Really?
And now he sells wooden spoons.
A lot of them.
Hmph.
Just saw that dreadful
Audrey Wilson.
Here's your egglette
and bagelette, dear.
Photographer's coming at 6:00.
I'll never have
everything ready in time.
I don't know why
you insist on doing
everything yourself.
Because that way,
I'll know things
will be done right.
I'm sure everything
will be fine.
[Whistles]
Morning, Mrs. M.
Mr. M.
Rex and I were just
about to go for a walk.
The dog'll get filthy.
I'll have to bathe him again!
It's a dog, Claire.
Rex, dear, come.
Rex...
Come!
Rex! Come on, boy.
[Panting]
Whoa-h*!
Oh, no!
Oh!
[Claire gasping]
[Rex whimpers]
What have you done?
It wasn't me, it was...
What am I talking about?
It was totally my fault.
I am so sorry!
It's not so bad...
The tray is fine.
This is a nightmare.
Mom! It's an accident.
It's just a cake.
No, this was my signature
Dulce de Leche cake,
that was going to be
featured in the Chronicle.
I can fix this.
Oh, you can't imagine my relief!
Just give me an hour. Two, tops.
Why not take half an hour?
Or 15 minutes? After all, I only
spend half the night baking it!
Claire...
Call Village Bakery. I'm
sure they can do something.
Oh, better yet,
why don't I send Mindy
to the supermarket
to get a frozen pie?
[Huffs indignantly]
Claire!
Are you protecting Rex?
Hey, he's got to live here.
Poor Rex.
[Laughing]
I'm gonna fix this cake.
Any ideas?
Oh, I don't bake, I don't cook.
I can't even use a
lemon squeezer.
Oh!
[Both laughing]
I haven't had a Twinkie
since we were little kids!
Yeah, I bought them on sale.
Look, Gridley, you
don't have to do this.
Yeah... I do.
The point was to
change her mind,
not break her heart.
Look alive.
She's not gonna like it.
We'll see.
Oops! You got it?
Yep, beautiful. Perfect.
Do you want it level
or do you want it staggered?
Do it level, slightly staggered,
a little cantilever.
It's like the arch
we made for prom.
Oh, yeah! That was awesome.
It was awesome till it fell
on all those poor
little juniors.
Oh, yeah! [Snickers]
That was awesome.
Stop it.
Alright, where does this go?
Tell me that isn't the same tree
that I, uh...
TP'd?
You knew?
- Yeah, I knew!
- Did your folks know?
Oh, no, they blamed
Wade Wilson for years!
Oh! Wade Wilson!
Whatever happened to that brat?
That's "Dr. Brat" to you, sir.
He's is first-year med school.
Well, I knew he'd never
amount to anything!
Right.
You remember that trick
that I used to do?
Don't do it!
- You remember it?
- Don't do it.
You mean this one? This trick?
- So annoying!
- This trick?
- It's like the most annoying...
- Look!
Ohh!
- You did not...
- Stop it! Be an adult!
Stop! My phone's ringing.
[Cell phone ringing]
Richard! Hi. How's golf?
What's in your hair?
Huh? Do I have frosting... I
have frosting in my hair.
Um, uh, Gridley's making a cake.
Really? So...
Things are going well then?
Mm! Mm-hmm. Fantastic.
Yeah. They hate me.
They do! They hate you so much.
- Hey!
- Ahh!
Honey, I gotta call
you back, okay?
Clock is ticking on this cake.
- Bye-bye!
- Sure...
[Slinky clack-swishing]
[Josie]: Mom! What do you think?
Well, it's not my cake,
but I suppose it will do.
I can give you the
recipe, if you'd like.
That will not be necessary.
Dodged a b*llet there, huh?
Could you please
put down that toy?
It's annoying.
Okay, girls, follow me.
We have work to do.
[Gridley]: Anyone up for a walk?
No, thank you.
Maybe I'll take granddad, then.
He won't go.
Okay. Rex?
He won't go either.
Alright. Guess
I'll go by myself.
[Panting eagerly]
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
I always loved this town.
I grew up near the gas
station up on hill.
Wasn't the most
glamorous address,
but we did have nice,
big old trees.
Oak.
They're sycamore trees.
Yeah.
Good call on that William
Howard Taft, though.
[Laughs] Wait!
I... I thought you didn't talk.
Dementia or...
Oh, no, no, no, no.
I'm-I'm-I'm sharp
as a tack, yeah.
Yeah.
This way, I get to
tune everybody out.
But that's...
[Laughs]
That's genius!
Who else knows about this?
Nobody, and I want
to keep it that way.
My lips are sealed.
Time to turn around.
But what about Josie and Mindy?
Ah, that's a tough one.
Collateral damage, I guess.
But don't worry... I'll
make up for it in my will.
[Gridley laughs]
- Ready?
- Yep.
I thought the party was inside.
Oh, it's just in case
someone looks out a window.
What are we doing?
Re-arranging the deck
chairs on the Titanic.
I wanted to mention to you
that Richard really does have
a lot of great contacts.
So if you're ever
looking for, like, a...
A real job?
Well, I mean, it's not
like you need one,
but should the driftwood
thing ever drift away...
I'll call Richard Wright of
Wright, silver, and gunk.
That's gumm.
- What?
- Gumm?
Oh, no, thanks. Trying to quit.
[Laughs]
Hey, I'm sorry about
the green hair.
Actually, I owe you an apology.
I lied. It does come out.
What?
I like having green hair.
Makes me feel like
I'm someone else.
Mindy, why would you want
to be somebody else?
Uh, because I'm invisible.
In this family.
I'm like an afterthought.
That's not true.
Come on, Josie.
You've always been the favorite.
You're the go-getter, like dad,
and I'm the Mayfield
black sheep.
Or the green sheep.
[Snickers]
Alright, look, you're not
supposed to know what
you're doing at this age.
Well, you did.
But you're in college still.
I dropped out.
Mindy... when?
Last year.
Please don't tell
mom and dad, okay?
They're just gonna freak out.
Look, I have a job.
At a coffeehouse.
I'm singing there.
The thing is...
I want to be a singer.
Like...
I know how incredibly
stupid that sounds...
No, it's not. It's not stupid.
Really?
No, remember?
We used to goof
around all the time.
Singing the oldies.
♪ Won't you come
home Bill Bailey? ♪
Yeah, but I was 8.
How come you didn't
tell me this before?
I don't know.
I guess I just assumed
you wouldn't approve.
That's crazy! Why
wouldn't I approve?
Uh... because you have an MBA,
and you went straight
into the family business,
and you pretty much haven't made
a misstep since you could walk.
Mindy.
You are a great singer.
You always have been,
and I'm really, really proud
of you for doing this, okay?
That other stuff, that's dad,
that's stuff he cares about,
not me.
Wait. Are you saying
that I'm like dad?
[Man]: Heads up!
Geez!
♪ ♪
[Hushed]: It's Wade Wilson.
What?
It's Wade Wilson. What do I do?
We gotta throw it back.
You hand it back.
And then what do I do?
Well, just think about
what your mother would do,
and do the exact opposite.
Okay. Now.
- No! No...
- Yes. Yes.
Yes. Good luck.
We should probably go.
Mindy?
Hey...
Thanks.
You're welcome.
I like your hair.
[Chuckles]
Thanks.
Is that Gridley?
[Mindy]: Yeah.
That guy got me blamed
for TP'ing your yard!
Yeah. I think there's still
some left up on our roof.
Hey,
so, um, how much longer
are you in town for?
Just the weekend. You?
Oh, just until my
parents' party is over.
We weren't invited.
Oh, lucky you.
What have you been
doing in school?
[Mindy]: Oh, you know...
Come on, let's give these
kids some privacy.
Hey, you don't think I'm
like my dad, do you?
Nah. You're way prettier.
Maybe a little.
I could be wrong.
No. You're right.
I mean, he's like a Swiss watch,
and I suppose I am, too.
I haven't had a spontaneous
moment in forever.
Hey! You invited me home.
He wouldn't have done that.
Oh, Richard invited
you home, actually.
And I got through the
front door this time.
Good work.
"Dulce de Leche?"
I think we just found your
mom's "signature" cake.
It's from a bakery.
I cannot believe that,
all these years,
she's been pretending
to make this.
I mean, what am I saying?
Of course I can.
Let's put it back.
[Trash crashing]
Who's out there?
It's just me...
Wade Wilson!
[Stifled laughter]
What are you doing?
[Laughing]
Alright, alright, but
what about the time.
Mrs. L put on the panda suit?
[Both cracking up]
And she was...
[Still laughing]
It was so dumb!
She was a good teacher.
Aw, she was alright.
Oh, man. How many times
did we skip chemistry
to play frisbee?
Well, it's because the
auditorium window
was always loose...
They made it too easy.
Probably still is.
Now?
♪ ♪
[Indistinct banter]
[Both laughing]
[Indistinct chatter]
Shh. Come on.
Maybe there's another
open window.
I'll go.
I'm gonna go, I'm gonna go.
Okay.
[Grunting]
Oh, my god.
- Watch out.
- Sorry.
We did it!
Get the door.
Okay.
♪ ♪
Good work.
Ah.
It's so small.
[Grunts]
- Nice!
- Yes.
- I'm home!
- [Josie laughing]
I wonder if they got the
number back on my locker.
No.
- No! Numberless.
- Is it?
And they took the green
day sticker off.
How dare they?
- Right?
- Ruined!
Where are our pictures?
Are they in the trophy case?
We have to look.
I mean, we were a
pretty big deal.
I mean, pretty big!
No, this is sports.
That was not...
We weren't even allowed
to look at this one.
Not us.
Gridley! Here we are!
"Senior Prom Decorating
Committee." Look at that.
Aw!
Why did you let me wear
my hair like that?
It's awful!
Well, clearly,
hair was my thing.
Well... no, you were captain
of building things.
Yeah. And sometimes,
they even stayed up.
It was all so much fun.
What happened? Why
did we lose touch?
We were such great friends.
I don't know. Life
goes on, I guess.
You went to Wharton,
I went to Walmart.
Hey, what did
happen with school?
I mean, you had
really good grades.
Yeah, I went. For a year.
Got a scholarship.
Where?
M.I.T. Engineering.
Gridley, you did not
drop out of M.I.T.
Well, you know, my mom got sick,
and I wanted to help out,
and then, after she died,
I just kind of lost
interest in school.
Hey, I didn't know any of that.
I'm sorry. That's horrible.
It's alright. I...
It pushed me in
another direction.
I groomed horses in Kentucky.
I taught english in Guatemala.
I did ski patrol in Utah,
I even crewed a lobster
boat in Maine.
Won't be doing that again.
- Oh!
- I know.
[Astonished sigh]
You've lived, like... 10 lives.
I can barely manage one.
Oh, I think you're
managing pretty well.
I should've defended
you back then.
No. It's alright.
It's not.
I mean, it did bother me
that your parents didn't
think I was good enough.
But it was a long time ago.
They were wrong.
They're wrong now.
I'm sorry. I want you to know that.
I'm...
I'm really sorry.
Apology accepted.
[Key scratches door]
Oh!
♪ ♪
[Laughing] Go, go!
♪ ♪
[Knocks]
I'm sorry to interrupt.
Apparently, I'm supposed
to borrow a dark suit,
a white shirt, and a tie.
You winning?
And losing.
[Inhales sharply]
Rook to queen's bishop.
I wouldn't have taken
you for a chess player.
Well, my dad taught me.
Hmm. Pull up a chair.
What does your dad
do for a living?
Mechanic.
Actually, he fixed
your car once.
He worked at the
station up on hill.
Yeah, it's a long time ago,
you probably don't remember.
Big guy, red hair.
[Chuckles]
That was him.
I do remember.
He did a really good job.
Very reasonable, too.
That he was.
He still working?
Ah, a little.
Moved to Florida
after my mom died.
- Aw, I'm sorry.
- Nah.
They had a lot of
good years together.
Not as many as you and Mrs. M.
We've had a lot of
years, I'll say that.
[Whistles]
That's a lifetime.
Sometimes, it feels
like two lifetimes.
She's working really hard
to make this party nice.
It must mean a lot to her.
What means a lot to Claire
is getting on the cover
of the Chronicle.
Your move.
Uh, by the way, thank
you for the slinky.
It, uh... Well, it reminds me
of a time when things
weren't so ordered.
You're welcome.
Check.
You know, it's good manners
to let your host win.
Not a chance.
[Both start chuckling]
♪ ♪
Wow!
You look...
Like my mother?
Well, I was going
to say beautiful,
but yeah, that works.
Well, look at you,
you're just like...
The C.E.O. Of "Driftwood, Inc."
Full-windsor, half-windsor,
eldredge, or cape knot?
What?
Half-windsor is the
new full windsor.
Eldredge is the
new half-windsor.
Oh, it's a tough call.
Eldredge.
Handsome.
♪ ♪
I'm gonna go fix that
before the national
guard gets called in.
Yes. Of course.
Okay, there we go.
Alright, easy now.
Watch your step.
Careful.
It's slippery. Careful.
- Careful.
- I'm fine.
I'm not fine! [Laughs]
Oh!
Whoa!
♪ ♪
- Oh!
- Oh...
Uh... Richard.
[Gridley sighs]: "Mr. Right."
Hi. Sorry to intrude.
The door was open.
I just wanted to drop off
an anniversary gift.
May your next 40 years be
as happy as the first 40.
Thank you, Richard.
You want to open it?
I know how much you like
coffee and tea products...
And this baby is straight
from Switzerland.
The next generation in
espresso machines...
Hasn't even hit the market yet.
I had a client pull
a few strings.
Oh, that's very generous.
Very.
Hi, granddad.
Richard, this is my granddad.
[Loudly and slowly]: Hi!
Nice to meet you... sir.
He can hear. He
just doesn't speak.
Oh.
It's okay.
And this is my sister, Mindy.
Hi, Mindy. I've heard
so much about you.
You too.
Posture, Mindy.
So I can see that you've all
got a lot going on here,
so I will just head out
before your guests arrive.
[Claire]: I won't hear of it.
You'll stay for the party.
Oh, no, thank you, but I've
got a long drive back.
Nonsense!
We insist you stay.
In fact, you'll spend the night.
You can have the blue room,
upstairs at the end of the hall.
Thank you.
You know, we used
to stock this line,
but the... The frother
always broke.
Not on this one.
This is a Jura Impressa
from Switzerland.
Top of the line.
Why don't you let me show you?
[Claire]: Let's go
to the kitchen.
[Mouths word]
This baby is the Lamborghini
of espressomakers...
All the bells and whistles.
Die-cast aluminum boiler,
uh, overheating
protection device...
[Bass fish singing]
I'm just going to plug
it in and fire it up,
and I will show you how am...
[Power crackles]
[All gasping]
♪ ♪
Oh! I don't believe it!
That stupid fish
knocked the power out.
What did I do to deserve this?
♪ ♪
Mom, where are the
extra candles?
I don't know! I
can't see a thing.
Joseph! Get a flashlight.
Flashlight app.
Thank you, Richard.
Where's the panel? I'll
check the breakers.
You've done quite enough.
[Grandpa]: How do I
get out of here?
[Knocking]
♪ ♪
[Knocking]
♪ ♪
You know what, Mrs. Mayfield?
I'll be happy to
check the breakers.
They're downstairs.
I'll help you.
♪ ♪
Do you know how hard it
is to get candle wax out?
Next thing you know,
there'll be a fire!
The electrician can't get
here until tomorrow.
This is a disaster!
The photographer's gonna
be here any minute!
You know, I saw a generator
in the Wilsons' yard.
We don't associate
with the Wilsons.
Claire! Take a deep breath.
Sit down, I'm sure
everything will be fine.
I don't see how.
♪ ♪
[Richard]: Which door is it?
[Josie]: Slow down. It's on the left.
Right here.
- Okay.
- Okay, shine the light.
It's over here.
What are you doing here?
Why were your arms around him?
Oh, Richard. I lost my balance.
This was a bad idea.
No! He's doing us a favor.
Oh, yeah?
Well, it looks like he's
having too good a time.
He's not.
Besides, my parents
just invited you
to spend the night.
You're right. I'm sorry.
I just... I saw you with him,
and I got a little bit jealous.
How crazy is that?
Right?
♪ ♪
Uh...
[He sighs]
Come on.
Do you know what
this reminds me of?
Our first date.
Oh, this is worse.
Well, the electricity went
out in that restaurant.
Don't remind me.
I forgot my wallet.
I know, I lost my contact lens.
I couldn't even pay the bill.
We couldn't pay a lot
of bills in those days.
[Gulps, then scoffs]
[Chatting and
laughing, indistinct]
Alright, this should
do the trick.
Oh, perfect! Thanks, guys.
Hey, no problem.
You know, it's nice
to see Mindy open up.
Maybe we should get
you some green hair.
Oh, no. No.
I'll stick with the gray.
Can I be honest with you?
Well... If you have to.
I kind of like being
in a relationship,
even if it's pretend.
Still pretend, huh?
Does it matter?
She's with Richard.
That guy's a stiff.
I don't know, gramps. I might
be in over my head here.
Let me tell you something.
If you never commit to anything,
you're gonna miss out
on some of the best
things in life.
You know you're a guy
who hasn't spoken to his
family in two years?
[Chuckles]
Alright. Fingers crossed.
[Generator chugging]
Oh!
Just in time!
[Gridley]: Easy.
Watch your step.
[Claire]: We can't
thank you enough.
[Joseph]: Well done, Richard.
- Bravo!
- My pleasure.
[Claire]: I don't know
what we would have done.
You gonna let that
suit take credit?
That's what I'm here for.
Well, if you say so.
[Claire]: Alright,
let's get going.
We have so much to do
before everyone gets here.
Joseph, go check on the food.
Richard, get... Get
those candles.
Um... sure.
[Claire]: Okay, dad, you
need to get dressed. Go on.
You, too, Richard.
How do we think today went, Rex?
[Rex whines]
Yeah. That's what I thought.
[Knocks]
Oh.
Thank goodness.
Help me get this
noose off my neck.
What are you doing?
Well, your parents love Richard,
they hate me... My
work here is done.
You're not leaving.
Well, you don't need me anymore.
Yeah, I do!
You do?
Gridley...
Just stay. It's a party, okay?
Okay, so let me get
this straight.
You want me to be
your plus-two now?
Or am I your plus-one
and Richard's your plus-two?
Just stay.
♪ ♪
[Claire]: Josie!
Where are you?
- So you're gonna stay? Okay.
- Mm-hmm.
But I'm stickin'
with "plus-one."
I was here first.
Thanks for fixing the lights.
♪ ♪
How do ya like that?
[Rex barks]
[Chuckles]
[Barks]
[Mindy]: It's not here.
[Joseph]: Well, it couldn't
have just disappeared.
[Claire]: Well, that's it.
- We've looked everywhere.
- What's wrong?
Your mother's Faberge
egg is missing.
We've combed the room!
It's gone.
I hate to be the one to say it,
but I think we all
know where it's gone.
What do you mean?
Where's Gridley?
Oh, you're not blaming Gridley?
What do you really
know about him, Josie?
Stop it! I've known
Gridley my whole life.
It's been a long time
since high school.
Gridley is not a thief!
He would never do
anything like that!
He doesn't care about an egg.
Do you know how much
that egg is worth?
Mother, yes.
We all know.
It'll show up, Claire,
and if it doesn't,
we'll get another one.
[Doorbell rings]
It's the Chronicle.
Did you take that egg
to make him look bad?
[Scoffs] No! He's done
that all on his own.
- So you didn't take it?
- Of course not.
Ready, Mrs. Mayfield?
Welcome to our happy home.
Smile!
♪ ♪
[Buzzing chatter,
background music]
♪ ♪
Hi, Richard.
Gentlemen! Over here, please?
Oh! Uh...
And can I get your names
for the Chronicle?
- I'm...
- Richard Wright, of Wright...
Silver, and Gumm.
This is my card.
Uh, Gridley.
Of, um... Well, just Gridley.
[Chuckles] Been there.
Haven't we all?
And who are you gentlemen
to the family?
I'm Josie Mayfield's boyfriend.
And I'm her...
He's, uh... an acquaintance.
But Josie and I did
go to prom together.
Maplewood High.
My alma mater.
You're kidding?
♪ Bear down, Maplewood
fight, Leafs, fight! ♪
Roots in the community,
enduring friendship...
The Chronicle loves this stuff!
Are you from here, too?
[Richard]: Sadly, no.
- But I'm...
- Miss Mayfield?
I'd love to get a shot of you
and your old
high-school boyfriend.
Oh, no, we only went
out the one time,
but it was memorable.
That it was.
Would you mind putting
your arm around her?
I think I can do that.
Perfect!
Great. Thank you.
- Honey... oh.
- Excuse me.
What are you guys, best friends?
Can you take that
around to the back?
Thank you.
Why aren't you socializing?
Because he isn't coming.
Who isn't coming?
Wade.
I invited him to the party.
Well, what do you expect,
with those horrible
parents of his?
Well, I like him.
And I thought he was
starting to like me, too.
You'll find someone
else, come on.
Mom...
What if I don't want
to find someone else?
Excuse me?
How about a picture of you two?
Of course.
Could you sh**t her
from the right, please?
Do you have to control
everything that I do?
Somebody has to.
You're right.
Me.
Put your hair behind your...
Look, mom! Mom...
I like the green hair.
And I'm keeping it.
Look, I know it doesn't fit
into the Mayfield image,
but I don't fit into
the Mayfield image!
Mindy... My whole life...
I've been under Josie's shadow,
trying to be who
you want me to be!
I'm not Josie, but I
am worth something!
And I dropped out of college!
What?
When did this happen?
Two semesters ago.
And where has my
tuition been going?
It's in a bank account.
You can have it all back.
I have a job...
I'm singing.
In a coffee house.
You can't be serious.
This is who I am!
And who exactly might that be?
[Wade]: Ahem.
♪ Won't... you come home ♪
♪ Bill Bailey? ♪
♪ Won't you come home? ♪
♪ She moans all day long ♪
Look, this really isn't app...
[Begins timidly]: ♪ I'll
do the cookin', honey ♪
♪ I'll pay the rent ♪
[more boldly]: ♪ I
know that I've... ♪
♪ Done wrong ♪
[begins playing piano]
♪ Remember that rainy evenin' ♪
♪ I kicked you out ♪
♪ With nothin' but a
fine-tooth co-o-omb ♪
♪ I know ♪
♪ I'm to blame ♪
♪ Ain't that a shame? ♪
♪ Bill Bailey, won't you
please come home? ♪
[Gridley]: Come on, everybody!
[Guests joining]: ♪ Won't you
come home, bill Bailey? ♪
♪ Won't you come home? ♪
♪ She moans the
whole night long ♪
♪ I'll do the cookin', honey ♪
♪ I'll pay the rent ♪
♪ I know that I've done wrong ♪
♪ Remember that rainy evening ♪
♪ I kicked you out ♪
♪ With nothing but a
fine-tooth comb ♪
♪ I know I'm to blame ♪
♪ Ain't that a shame? ♪
♪ Oh, Bailey won't
you please come... ♪
♪ Come on, Bailey, now ♪
♪ Bill Bailey won't you
please come home? ♪
♪ Oh, Bailey ♪
♪ Bill Bailey, won't
you please come... ♪
[Mindy]: ♪ Ba-doop
boop-a-doop, de-doo ♪
♪ O-o-oh... ♪
[Loud applause]
[Blowing air]
[Applause continues]
Yay!
Yeah, it's Richard.
I need a favor.
I need you to check
someone out for me.
[Party bustling with
guests chatting]
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
Enjoying yourself, granddad.
I noticed people were
starting to sweat,
so, finally, I walked into
the middle of the room,
and I said, "listen... If
you can't take the heat",
get out of the
kitchen business."
[Guests laughing]
Dad's telling jokes
and mom's laughing.
Who are these people?
Tell me they're
not going to turn
back into our parents again.
Hey, do you remember that?
Of course, I remember that!
Do you remember
what you were like
when you started the business?
You were so full of ideas!
Mayfield's was your idea.
Oh, no! I may have
contributed a bit.
More than a bit!
There would be no Mayfield's,
if it was not for your kitchen.
Thank you.
[Chuckles]
It was sort of fun
back then, wasn't it?
We were a team.
We were.
You know...
Oh, this probably isn't
the right moment,
but I have had a thought
about the business.
Oh, no. I shouldn't say it.
Of course, you should say it.
Well...
I was thinking about
a line of dogware,
for the kitchen...
You know, plates,
bowls, et cetera.
Do you remember
Prince's favorite bowl?
[Laughs] Didn't
he eat that bowl?
Yes! Yes, he did.
And...
Gentlemen, let me introduce
you to my daughters...
Josie and Mindy.
- Hi.
- How are you?
How do you do? And how's
business, Joseph?
[Joseph]: Oh, could be
better, right, Josie?
[Josie]: Oh, it could be worse.
We're certainly not shrinking.
The fact is, is that
we're not growing,
and, actually, Claire just
had a very interesting idea.
I think that Mayfield's
is going to introduce
a line of dogware.
A canine line!
Oh, mom, I love it! It's great!
And why don't we do a
line for cats as well?
Smiles, please?
Great! I've got
everything I need,
so you enjoy the rest
of your evening.
No! We were just about
to cut the cake.
I'll take care of it, Mrs. M.
Twist my arm.
♪ ♪
[All applauding]
To Mr. and Mrs. M...
Still together, after
all these years.
The tide may have taken
you here or there,
but true love...
Like driftwood,
reinvents itself and
stands the test of time.
♪ ♪
To love.
May it always find its way.
[Guests applauding]
Well, that is certainly...
Fantastic!
Yes. It is.
I love that!
Did you make this?
Uh, well, I...
Uh, she did!
It's not what she
normally makes,
but this time,
she decided to try something
a little different.
It's incredible, Mrs. Mayfield.
Thank you.
I'd love to get some shots
of the family with the cake.
Smiles, everyone.
What's that shiny
thing over there?
Oh! Uh, this is a, uh, Jura
Impressa coffee machine.
This is imported
from Switzerland.
Yeah, I'm getting a
reflection from that.
Do you think we could,
uh, move it somewhere?
Preferably out of the room.
Oh. Not a problem.
Could you grab that?
Yeah. [Chuckles]
Smiles, everyone!
Beautiful...
[Claire chuckles]
[Photographer]: What a cake.
What's it made of?
That's my little secret.
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
Cake?
Oh, thank you.
It's delicious, Mrs. Mayfield.
Thank you, dear.
What is that taste?
It's so familiar.
[Chuckles quietly]
It really is good, isn't it?
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
I need to know.
What's in the cake?
What's in the cake?
It's incredible!
[Whispering]
[Bike bell rings]
Oh, my!
I don't believe it.
We made the front page.
Congratulations, dear.
Oh!
When the Wilsons were in,
they only got page 9.
Oh! Listen to this.
"To my great relief,"
the Mayfield house was not
yet another picture-perfect
postcard...
Instead it was a
delightful combination
of whimsy, warmth and fun.
Claire Mayfield has
created a true home,
"and an anniversary cake
made of Twinkies..."
Twinkies?
I knew that tasted familiar!
Oh! [Laughing]
Congratulations
on the Chronicle,
after waiting all these years.
Yes, and the cover too.
I'm sorry. What page was
your little story on again?
You know, we're so
proud of our Wade.
It'll be so nice to have
another doctor in the family.
Perhaps he'll specialize
in plastic surgery.
And what are your
daughters doing nowadays?
You know, I'm so glad you asked.
Josie is still in wooden spoons,
and Mindy...
She sings in a coffeehouse.
Oh, dear.
She's very good.
In fact, we couldn't be prouder.
Enjoy your day.
Good grief, that
woman is a snob.
[Joseph chuckles]
You know what's funny?
I wanted this party
so I could get in the Chronicle.
I guess I was so caught up
in appearances
because they're all I have.
That's not true.
It is.
The girls are grown.
You and I... We've drifted,
like a piece of that wood.
I mean, until last night,
I'd forgotten what it was like
to have you listen to me.
I like being a team again.
So do I.
And suddenly...
[Chuckling warmly]
Our anniversary means
so much more to me
than any newspaper.
♪ ♪
Here it is!
So?
Better than I even imagined.
Oh, mom, I'm so excited for you.
Thank you, dear.
- Oh, my.
- Wow!
- Where's granddad?
- Oh, he went for a walk.
- All by himself?
- Oh, don't worry, Mrs. M.
He's been around the
block a few times.
Well, that's true.
Nonfat latte, Mr. Mayfield?
Thank you, Richard.
Gridley?
I thought you might be able
to use this for your vehicle.
Extra virgin olive oil?
This is the good stuff!
Of course! We are
Mayfields, after all.
I can get an extra five miles
to the gallon with this.
Thank you. I'll
put it by my bag.
You're welcome.
[Joseph]: You know, I was, uh...
I was thinking about
your driftwood.
Now, we normally go with
acacia on our salad bowls,
but I wouldn't mind
mixing things up a bit.
Now, I know you're not
exactly a corporate guy,
although you did look
good in my suit.
Can't argue with that!
Why don't you pop by the office
and we'll discuss some ideas?
Your schedule permitting.
My schedule? Um...
Yep, I'm wide open
at the moment.
[Laughs]
Sorry to interrupt, but
that's not exactly true...
Is it, Gridley?
Something on your mind, d*ck?
Actually, there is.
Just wondering why
you're leaving next week
on a one-way ticket?
Puerto Rico this time, is it?
What's going on?
I made a few calls
and I'm glad I did.
This guy moves every six months.
Obviously, he's running
from something.
Richard, why are you doing this?
I'm just trying to
protect you, Josie.
And your family.
Okay, but just so you know,
Gridley is going to Puerto Rico
because it's a place
he's never been before,
and a friend invited
him to crew on a boat.
You knew?
Of course I knew!
I mean, it's just
Gridley being Gridley.
No.
Josie... um...
Mr. Wright here is right.
I haven't been
completely honest.
Mr. and Mrs. M,
I have some confessions to make.
Um...
Number one,
I TP'd your house in 12th grade.
It was a brilliant job, but
I feel bad nonetheless.
[Chuckles]
Number two...
I do move around a lot.
I've never stayed
anywhere for very long
because I never really
had a reason to.
But I think I might
have a reason now.
Here you are.
And three...
I still have feelings
for your daughter, sir.
Josie, I...
My egg!
Oh...
Oh, no.
And I was just
starting to like you.
I have no idea how
that got in there.
This is... This is
just disappointing.
Mrs. M, I didn't... I
didn't take your egg.
I don't even like eggs.
Well, I'm sure there's
an explanation.
Isn't there?
Probably.
I don't have one.
Look, I am a lot of things
that you don't approve of,
but I am not a thief.
[Uneasy chuckle]
I think I should go.
Aw, Rex. You're a good boy, hey?
Go to Mrs. M.
♪ ♪
Oh, Rex.
Gridley!
I know you didn't take the egg.
Thank you.
Um... look, about
what I said in there,
I shouldn't have put you
on the spot like that,
but I meant every word.
I don't know.
I just... I don't know.
Oh, hey. Hey, don't.
Don't. It's okay.
What did I expect? I mean,
this wasn't the plan.
Everything worked out the
way it was supposed to.
I just want you to be happy.
♪ ♪
Well, this brunch is excellent.
Thank you, Richard.
Mr. Mayfield,
if you have a moment
before we leave,
um, I'd love to talk with
you about my client.
Well, how about right now?
Great! Because this guy is
perfect for your foreign sales.
He's an international
marketing genius
and he speaks Mandarin.
Mandarin? [Chuckles]
[Forced chuckle]
What is it?
Well, I was just thinking
of Gridley's van
running on Chinese food.
Do you know how hungry I was,
driving up in that thing?
All I could think about
was beef and broccoli.
I would k*ll for some
orange chicken right now.
Kung pao shrimp!
Moo goo gai pan!
I just can't believe he
was gonna steal my egg.
Mother, he wasn't gonna steal your egg.
We've been over this.
- I know, but...
- Claire.
Forget the egg.
How can I?
Because...
Because it's a fake.
What?
I couldn't afford to buy
you a real one back then.
I was just trying
to impress you,
and I know you were disappointed
on our first anniversary.
I wasn't disappointed.
But it was only a rose.
♪ ♪
I've kept that
rose for 39 years.
♪ ♪
Alright. Ahem.
Here we go.
My signature Dulce
de Leche cake?
From a bakery.
Never made it. Not even once.
I never liked that cake.
Neither did I.
[All laughing]
Oh, Josie, I have
some news for you.
I believe your mother's is gonna
be returning to the company.
Oh, mom!
Mom, that's... I
mean, it's perfect.
It's perfect!
You can have my office!
You can redecorate, you
can do anything you want!
I don't understand.
I will always be
your little girl,
but...
You've laid my whole
life out for me.
Daddy, I don't care
about tea caddies
or mixing bowls... I don't cook!
It's like I woke up one
day and I was in my 30s,
and I can't even take a
walk without mapquesting.
What are you saying, then?
Are you quitting?
I just think I definitely need
some time to figure things out.
Isn't this a bit sudden?
Actually, I think it's
very long overdue.
Well, maybe you're right.
Maybe you're right.
We trust your decisions.
If you and Richard
want to be together,
it's with our blessing.
Oh! Honey... Isn't that great?
And we trust your
decisions, too, Mindy.
Even if they involve green hair.
I don't know what to say.
Me either.
What if we say it's about time?
Well, uh...
Wade's coming to hear
me sing next week.
Maybe you guys could come, too?
We'd love to.
Wouldn't we, Joe?
You haven't called
me "Joe" in ages!
[Laughs]
Hey! That's... That's my watch.
[Claire]: Rex!
♪ ♪
Oh, Rex.
What did you do?
Oh, Rex!
Well...
There's your thief.
So, Gridley was
telling the truth?
Excuse me.
♪ ♪
You know, if this
client works out,
I've got another one
in distribution.
He's a genius.
Why don't we just stick
with the one for now?
Yeah.
So... what now?
What do you mean?
Josie...
You've been bringing guys
home like Richard for years,
and just using dad's disapproval
as an excuse to say goodbye.
That's not true.
Okay. Well... It
just seems to me
that if you ever really
liked any of them,
you'd have fought for them.
Okay. I'll, uh,
I'll talk to her,
and I'll call you right back.
Hi. Babe, I just
got off the phone
with my guy at R&L.
I think I can get you a job,
but I have to act fast.
Richard...
I can't.
You don't... You
don't want the job?
No. Okay.
You and I don't make sense.
Maybe we do on paper,
I'm just...
I'm so sorry.
I don't...
I don't understand.
Well, that's the problem.
Is this about your little
high-school sweetheart?
[Scoffing]
You can't be serious
about Gridley!
I mean, the guy is
a complete loser.
No, he's not.
And I let him walk
away once before...
I can't do it again.
Take my car.
Jo...
Josie!
[Mindy]: You're going
after Gridley!
Oh!
You go, girl.
What?
I knew it!
[Granddad laughing]
[Claire]: Dad!
Huh?
Oh!
I-I...
Guess I have some
explaining to do.
You certainly do!
How long have you
been able to speak?
[Laughing] I don't care!
Oh... dad.
Oh!
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
Bet you regret tearing
up that ticket.
I didn't really think
it all the way through.
This weekend didn't turn out
like I thought it would.
Nothing ever does.
I have a confession
to make, too.
What kind of confession?
I don't want Mr. Right.
- No?
- I want Mr. Wrong.
Mr. Totally Wrong.
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
Welcome to our World! Where we serve you cookies to ensure you get the best viewing experience on our site.
Did you know that you can remove censorship board-wide, use our advanced search functions, be notified when new content is posted, join our memberships, set episodes to show in any order you want & more if you are logged into your account?
Register or sign in here: ucp.php?mode=register
Did you know that you can remove censorship board-wide, use our advanced search functions, be notified when new content is posted, join our memberships, set episodes to show in any order you want & more if you are logged into your account?
Register or sign in here: ucp.php?mode=register
Surprised by Love (2015)
Moderators: Maskath3, sidolanters, GabrielAlejo2341