05x13 - Rupert and the Whizz Watch

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Yahoo!

Whee!

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Strange.

That bottle is floating in the wrong direction!

Hey! Who in tarnation stole my parcel?

Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know it was yours.

Actually, it's the property of the Seas Postal Service.

Until I find A Master Rupert Bear of Nutwood, that is.

Ever heard tell of him?

Ha, ha! I know him well!

As a matter of fact, he's me!

Well, in that case, here ya go!

Rush delivery from Rocky Bay!

Goodbye! And thank you!

"From Young Tom,

care of the Rocky Bay Home for Retired Pirates".

I should have known!

Who else but a pirate would send me a note in a bottle?

"Dear, Rupert, you're invited!"

Invited? To what?

The First Annual Rocky Bay Pirate Pageant!

That's Young Tom, Bill Bottles, and Mr. Ribbons!

(Train whistle blowing)

It looks like Rocky Bay has been overrun with pirates!

Ahoy, Rupert!

Excuse me? I don't think I know--

Young Tom?

Good to see you lad! I hardly knows ye, ye be grown so much!

Going? But he just got here!

"Growing!" Young Tom says he be growing!

Oh, Aye! That he has, Bill Bottles!

We hardly recognize ye, Rupert!

I hardly recognized you either, Mr. Ribbons!

Oh, these be our costumes!

Aye, we was gettin' tired of folks thinkin' we was tourists.

(Laughing)

RUPERTA pirate pageant is a brilliant idea, Tom!

Aye! We're celebratin' the grand openin'

of he Rocky Bay Pirate Museum!

Thar she be off the port bow!

RUPERTIt's a pirate ship!

PIRATE CAPTAINSecure the deck gear!

DECKHANDAye, Captain!

CAPTAINSet the upward top sails!

DECKHANDAye, Captain!

This is fantastic!

Arr! What better place for a real Pirate Museum,

than aboard a real pirate ship?

Aye, puts ye to mind of the good old days, don't it, lads?

Arr! Arr!

Wow!

A treasure chest!

Aye, and she'll be the main attraction, too!

Mark my words!

(Gasping)

Treasure!

Is it real?

Course it be real! We's real pirates, ain't we?

All the lads at the retirement home

has chipped in what they could spare.

Wow!

But should it be on display out in the open like this?

You're not worried about pirates, are ye?

Don't fret, Rupert. We've hired a pair of crack security guards.

Hit the deck!

Check? Check what?

I say! Dreadfully sorry about that.

Must be using a bit too much of the old follow through, what?

(Goofy chuckling)

Heads up, old chap!

MANOww!

There's something very familiar about that security guard.

I say, topping shot, but you ought to be more careful, Cubby.

Nearly sent the ball over the rail.

Well, you certainly used the old bean that time, Cyril old bean.

Quite!

Rather!

(Goofy chuckling)

Cyril and Cubby!

The river pirates Constable Growler arrested in Nutwood!

They're posing as security guards

so they can steal the treasure.

I wonder if their Granddad is--

What h*, Cubby. Look who's here!

It's our old pal, Rupert, what!

They've spotted me!

I say, Cyril,

do you suppose he recognized us in the new team colours?

Only one way to find out. What say we chase the old boy down?

Oh, capitol idea! Lead on.

We'll head him off at the old crow's next, what.

Quite!

Phew.

I think I've lost them.

I've got to get ashore to warn the--

What h*, Rupert!

Oh, no!


Bit of a lark meeting you here, old boy!

Ahh...!

(Chuckling)

That Rupert's a regular swashbuckler, he is!

Reminds me of the good old days!

Whoa...!

Sorry, I was-- Ohh!

Hey, I remember you!

And I remember you!

Ahh!

Finally got you cornered, old sport!

You won't get away with--

(Camera flashing)

This?

Smashing! We'll add it to the old Nutwood album, what.

Arr! She be a small world and that's fer sure.

You've met old Ben and his grandkids afore has ye, Rupert?

I think they'd rather forget the day they met me.

Rupert here is the one who scuttled our river pirating

back in Nutwood!

Right, h*! And we had quite a haul, too, eh Cubby?

CUBBYRather!

But here's old Rupert and his policeman chum giving chase.

RUPERTThat's Constable Growler!

CYRILQuite gung h*, that one.

Here's the Nutwood side giving the ol' River Pirate Squad

a jolly good run for their money!

Quite. Game, set, and match, I'm afraid.

Bit of a rum do, eh Granddad?

GRANDDADOh, that's all water under the bridge now that I'm retired.

I plan to spend the rest of my days here with my friends

at the Rocky Bay Home for retired pirates!

Took me and my grandsons in like we was family, they has!

Aye, whether ye sails rivers or the seven seas,

pirates is pirates and we looks after our own.

(Camera flashing)

ALLArr!

(Bell dinging)

Avast, lads! It'll soon be time for the treasure buryin'!

We best be gettin' into our good duds!

(Excited chattering)

I say, arrr!

Rather! A yo-h*-h* for the home side, eh Cyril?

Arr! The tourists is lined up

thicker than flies around a bilge pump!

We'll give them a show they won't soon forget!

(Oohing and ahhing)

Arr!

Haul the treasure ashore, ya scurvy sea dogs!

Arr!

Arr! I be too old for this. Mark my words!

(Crowd gasping)

Arr! "X" marks the spot where we buries our treasure!

Aye aye, Capt'n Bottles!

No clear thinking pirate ever done this.

But the tourists swallow 'er up like a sardine sandwich!

The fun ain't over yet, folks!

You're all invited to our "Meet the Pirate Picnic".

You'll keep a close eye on that treasure, won't ye lads?

Right h*, Granddad! We're on watch, old bean.

Arr! And all that rot.

I say, perfect weather for a match, what?

Rather.

(Accordion music playing)

Arr!

Ohh! What?

I say, Cubby, you certainly made a big splash

at the old pirate picnic, what.

Quite!

(Goofy chuckling)

Oww!

Sorry, old top! Your shot.

Sometimes I wonder about them two.

Everyone had a great time. I know I did!

Aye! I'd say we done ourselves right proud, Rupert!

(Seagulls squawking)

All right, lads. Step forward and claim what's yours.

(Gasping)

Gone, the whole lot of it!

Who would do such a thing?

Croquet ba*ls?

I say, shiver the old timbers.

(Growling)

Arr. There be nothin' lower

than a pirate what steals from his mates!

Steady on, old chums!

You've nabbed the wrong fellows, eh Cubby?

Quite! We play for the home side straight down the line,

right Granddad?

Oh, I suppose thieving is in their blood

and it's all thanks to me.

Bit of a sticky wicket, what?

Rather!

GRANDDADI'm to blame for leading them down a crooked road years ago.

RUPERTBut there isn't any proof Cyril and Cubby are the thieves.

And they insist they didn't do it.

Rupert's right. Ye gotta hand it to 'em, Ben!

It were a clever bit of work!

True! As clever a trick as ever was.

Not something you'd expect from them lads,


if you're following my course.

Aye! Both of them be a jib short of a full sail. Arr.

This be someone else's doing. Mark my words!

Oh, I need to lie down for a spell.

They takes us in like we was family,

and this is how them boys shows their thanks.

This be the spot, Rupert. But the clues, if there be any,

have been washed out with the tide.

You're right, Tom. Not so much as a footprint to follow.

Whoa!

What?

The tide be rising right quick!

Hey! What happened?

You be in some kind of a sink-hole, Rupert.

Hold on! I think I'm standing on something!

Whoa!

Rupert!

A trap door!

So this is how they switched the buried treasure!

I'm all right! I've found a tunnel!

Tom? Mr. Ribbons?

Ahh...!

Help...!

(Coughing)

Hmm. It looks like they carted it off in a wheelbarrow.

I'm sure whoever it was is long gone by now.

YOUNG TOMThis is a fine kettle of fish!

We shouldn't have let them get away on us!

BILL BOTTLESBah! I be too old fer this! Mark my words!

Bill Bottles?

YOUNG TOMRupert, that be you?

BILL BOTTLESThank goodness you found us, lad!

YOUNG TOMMad? Of course I'm mad!

Why if I ever get my hands on the scurvy dog that-- Rupert!

What happened?

We was on the beach, fixing to haul you out of that hole,

when someone comes up from behind and bags us!

Aye! And then he hauls us off in some foul smelling old rig

and dumps us here.

A motor boat?

Aye! Chug-chug-chug she went.

Hmm. I think it's time we had a talk

with Cubby and Cyril's Granddad.

Old Ben? Why?

(Boat motor chugging)

You always were a clever lad, Rupert.

A might too clever by my way of thinking.

I knew Cyril and Cubby didn't steal the treasure!

Those clods? Ha!

A firefly is brighter than the pair of them put together!

We're going to report you to--

(Laughing)

Ahh!

(Gasping)

The tunnel is blocked!

Rocky Bay's only a mile swim round the point.

And by the time you and these old sea dogs manage that,

I'll be long gone!

(Evil laughter)

The Coast Guard can track him down. Let's get started!

Arr! Only problem, Rupert.

What's that, Tom?

Pirates don't swim.

Aye, it be a pirate's curse.

You swim to Rocky Bay, Rupert.

Don't be worrying about us. We'll stay here.

Shanghaied and marooned like a bunch of land lubbers!

We're a disgrace to the Jolly Roger.

Well, pirates might not swim,

but they know how to sail a boat.

Arr. But I don't see any seaworthy craft moored nearby.

I do!

(Oohing and ahhing)

Oo, I say, that was a good one.

Rather. What h*?

Now there's a something you don't see every day, Cyril!

Quite!

Arrr, this be the smallest skiff I've ever set sail in.

Aye, but she be as seaworthy a wheelbarrow as ever was!

If we hurry, we can still catch old Ben

before he gets away with the treasure.

I say, did he say, "Old Ben", old bean?

Not "Old Ben" as in old Granddad, old boy?

Rather!

I say, looks like we've been

sold down the river by the old river pirate!

Quite. Seems the captain of the home side

has put one past us! Bad form.

Arr! Look lively, men!

Haul anchor! Drop the main sail!

Secure the rigging!

off the starboard bow!

Aye aye, Rupert!

(Snickering)

What a clean getaway that was. Goodbye, Rocky Bay!

What?

Those old coots are after me!

This will slow them down!

We be closing the gap now, mates!

(Cannon firing)


Hit the deck!

Check? Check what?

We be under fire!

Load the cannon, Mr. Ribbons!

Where be the cannon ba*ls?

Arr! They be back at the home!

We was lawn bowling with them yesterday!

(Cannon firing)

Arr, we be scuttled now!

Chin up, Captain Bottles!

Cyril and I have a smashing idea!

Rather!

(Goofy chuckling)

Ha, ha! They'll be running up the white flag now!

What in blazes?

Topping shot, old Bean!

A bit more on the back swing and you're ready for the nationals!

Arr! Heads up, ye old river dog!

(Ball clunking)

Oww!

Oh, jolly good! Bang on the mark, hmm?

My hearing ain't what it used to be,

but I still has the deadest eye on the seas!

(Cheering)

I can't take no more of this!

I give up!

(Cheering)

It's an old fashioned boarding party!

Just like the good old days!

I say, Granddad! Say cheese, old boy!

Arrr!

So long, old boy!

Don't forget to write!

If I could only get my hands on the pair of you's!

I say, bit of a sore loser, what?

Rather. Bad show all round, I'm afraid.

What now, Cyril?

Now don't you worry, lads.

Yer welcome to stay on as part of the crew.

I say! Topping!

Yo h* h*, what!

Arr!

We be indebted to you Rupert, for recovering our treasure.

You deserves a reward, lad.

Aye! That be the pirate way, a full share of the booty!

But you've already given me my reward.

We has?

Yes. You've given me a day I'll never forget.

(Laughing)

Everyone say, "Arr"!

ALLArr!

CUBBYSmashing! This is one for the old family album, what?

CYRILRather!

(Goofy laughing)

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