02x47 - Ghost Fight at the O.K. Corral

[bunniefuu]

[Ray Parker Jr's "Ghostbusters" playing]

♪ Ghostbusters ♪

♪ There's something strange
In the neighborhood ♪

[alarm blaring]

♪ Who you going to call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters ♪

♪ There's something weird
And it don't look good ♪

♪ Who you going to call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters ♪

[tires screeching]

♪ I ain't afraid of no ghost ♪

[ghosts roaring]

♪ I ain't afraid of no ghost ♪

[whirring]

♪ Who you going to call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters ♪

♪ Who you going to call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters ♪

As the Mayor of Tombstone,

it is my great privilege
to introduce the man

{\an8}whose generous investment
will one day make Six-g*ns over Tombstone

the greatest Western theme park
in Southeastern Arizona.

Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Dewey LaMort.

[applause]

Howdy, partners.

And his lovely wife, Dorothy.

[applause]

The city of Tombstone
would like to present to you

a pair of boots that once belonged
to the earlier hero of the Wild West,

Wyatt Earp.

[camera clicking]

On behalf of myself
and my lovely wife Dorothy...

-[camera clicking]
-[man] Try 'em on.

What a picture.

[laughs]

Well, I don't know if anybody
can fill Wyatt Earp's shoes.

Yuck, but it looks like somebody has.

Huh, what the...

What?

-What's going on?
-I don't understand.

[all murmuring]

Well, at least you could
have had 'em cleaned.

What? Whoa!

[all murmuring]

What...What's that?

-Wha...Wha...
-Huh?

-[camera clicks]
-[people screaming]

[Dewey LaMort screaming]

[Dewey LaMort] Oh, no, oh, no, oh, no.

[man screaming]

-Yikes!
-[g*nshots firing]

[people screaming]

[Egon] This new ghost trap has twice
the psychokinetic energy suction

of the older model.

Ready, Slimer?

[mumbles]

[screams]

Now that's suction!

-[trap knocking]
-Huh?

[phone ringing]

Ghostbusters.

So, where's Slimer?

[all exclaiming]

More tests?

More tests.

[sobbing] [mumbles] More tests?

It's some guy named Dewey LaMort.

I think he's selling cemetery plots.

He keeps talking about a Tombstone.

Dewey LaMort?

The Dewey LaMort?

Who is Dewey LaMort?

Mr. LaMort? Slim Venkman here.

Slim?

Of course, Mr. LaMort.
We'll come out on the next plane.

Oh?

We're going to Tombstone, Arizona.

[indistinct mumbling]

My life is complete.

Who's Dewey LaMort?

He's the greatest
Western writer of all time.

I read his books all the time
when I was in college.

And I wasted my time studying.

He's written some great books.

There's Yamaho, Taglow,
and Gunnerbo and The Ratchet Brand.

The Ratchet Man...

The Night Glow, Barstow,
Ratchet Can, Dayglo...

I tell you, Dewey LaMort's a great writer!

[Egon] Right.

"He was a big man

with the broad shoulders
and lean hips of a desert rider.

There was trouble in his eyes.

And more trouble in the well-oiled colt
that he wore at his hip."

Which book is that from?

All of 'em.

[Peter]
There's something about the desert.

-Something that makes a man feel...
-Hot.

[fuming]

Yep, there goes the radiator.

Oh!

[Ray] It's over heated.

[Peter] I've always dreamed of this.
That's why I'm glad we left Slimer behind.

He'd ruin the feel for this place.

Why, a man could ride for days
in this country

and never see another living soul.

Hey, there's a car coming.

That must be Dewey LaMort!

Hey, stop.

-Wait!
-Hey!

Howdy, partners.

[all] Wait! Help!

-[tires screeching]
-[all coughing]

Hi, I'm Boris Mealey.

Mr. LaMort had to fly to New York
to attend a gala luncheon.

He asked me to show you around Tombstone.

Everybody else has left.

At least, everybody who's alive.

He had to say that.

-[Boris] I hate it out here.
-[Winston] Join the club.

-Why'd you come out West?
-It's my job.

I work for Random Choice Publishers.

I'm supposed to get publicity shots
for Dewey LaMort's new book, Earpo.

I'd like to k*ll the editor
who gave me this assignment.

[coughing]

[Boris] Go West, young man, go West.
I thought West meant Pennsylvania.

This is it, Boot Hill Cemetery.

Well, I guess this is a good
a place as any to start.

[Winston] As long as we don't end up here.

[mumbling]

Slimer? What are you doing here?

[mumbling]

Forget I asked,
just stay out of sight, OK?

If Peter sees you,
he'll send you back in a feed bag.

[gulps]

Men died with their boots on
in those days.

Yeah, now they're getting up
and walking around in them.

[Egon] I'm getting a PKE reading.

The trail leads into town.

-[camera clicking]
-[Egon] That's odd.

Now, there are four sets of footprints.

I'll bet those tracks belong to
Wyatt Earp's brothers, Virgil and Morgan.

And their friend Doc Holliday.

What are they doing here?

When you side with a man,
you stay with him.

Even when he's dead.

Yup, a ghost's gotta do
what a ghost's gotta do.

[all laugh]

The Old West is the essence
of American culture.

Didn't you ever play Cowboys and Indians
when you were kids?

I had a chemistry set.

I went to horror movies.

I played a lot of basketball.

You guys are hopeless.

[Winston] This place is like a ghost town.

It looks like they split up.

In four different directions.

-[camera clicking]
-We'd better split up, too.

Who would you like to go with, Mr. Mealey?

Uh, anybody but him.

Tinhorn.

[Boris] There's the OK Corral.

[Winston] Is this where the g*n fight was?

Well, actually, the g*n fight
was in that alley over there.

Across the street from
an old time photography studio.

Hey, a Foto Fast.

I'd better get some more film.

I'll be down the street.

Tombstone Epitaph. Hmm.

[machine powering up]

Uh-oh.

Bad news, fella.

Man, that was close.

Huh?

[screaming]

[Winston grunting]

Uh-oh.

[camera clicking]

-[Buzzing]
-[Ray] Hmm...

The tracks lead
into that dentist's office.

Peter said Doc Holliday was a dentist.

I'm getting a very strong reading. Gotcha!

Oh, no!

Oh, it's just you, Slimer.

So, what's up, Doc?

[yelps]

[whirring]

[Doc] Say, "Aah!" Or else.

[exclaims]

[grunts]

[g*nshots firing]

[yelling]

[both screaming]

I'll come back in six months.

[g*nshots firing]

[Slimer groaning]

[exclaiming]

Where'd he go?

He's around here somewhere.

This gown ain't big enough
for the both of us.

I think I've lost him. Hey, a saloon!

No ghosts in here.

Ah!

Place looks deserted.

Well, howdy, pilgrim.

[Wyatt Earp] Howdy, stranger.

Pull up a chair.

Actually, I need to be going...

[Wyatt Earp] I said, pull up a chair.

Western hospitality.

It's your deal.

What's your game?

Seven card high-low stud, draw,
roll your own, deuces, sevens, twos wild,

lavas tus manos, and full steam ahead.

Or whatever.

So, anybody need anymore?

[all] Aces to eights. Dead man's hand.

What have you got, stranger?

Four aces?

That's a lot of aces.

You know what this means.

We're using a canasta deck?

Somebody at this table is a cheat.

[thudding]

Good thing I didn't show 'em
that fifth ace.

Dance!

Only if I can lead.

[screaming]

[Mumbling]

Boy, talk about luck.

"Luck?"

[Peter] Yay!

[grunting]

Trouble?

With a tall T.

I wonder why these ghosts have come back
to haunt Tombstone now.

Maybe there's a clue somewhere in this.

I can't make anything out of this.
Here, have a look, Egon.

Could be some kind of code.

[all] The Code of the West.

It says the Earp brothers and Doc Holliday
had a shootout with the Clanton g*ng

at the OK Corral just before sundown.

You get some great light at sundown.

But the gunfight was a 100 years ago!

The newspaper is dated today.

[Egon] They ran this newspaper off
especially for us.

Like a challenge. This is our epitaph.

Start the car, Ray.

They must be planning
to clean up the town again.

And we're the trash.

Start the car, Ray.

[Egon] That's it, Winston.

The Earps have come back
to re-enact the gunfight,

with us as the Clantons.

[Winston] So, who won?

[Peter] Start the car, Ray.

[Winston] You're right, Peter.
We better get out of town before sundown.

[brakes screeching]

No, nobody tells me what to do, nobody!

I'm gonna stay right here.

This is Boot Hill, Ray.

[Egon] You can't run from a ghost.

You gotta face it head-on like a man.

We started this together
and we'll end it together.

And they said they didn't like Westerns.

[stutters] Don't look at me,
I just take pictures.

Let's go.

[all] OK.

[wind whooshing]

[groaning]

[mumbling]

[c*ck g*n]

[gasps]

Draw.

[g*ns firing]

[grunts] Ah!

[g*nshots continues]

[g*nshots]

[mumbles and screams]

My...my eyes!

[yells]

[groans]

Huh? Sixteen horseshoes.

This must be my lucky day.

[Ray] Run for it, Peter!

[g*nshots]

Let's go after 'em, boys.

[horses neighing]

[ghosts roaring]

[blows]

Well, at least we did better
than the Clantons.

I was starting to worry about you guys.

So, how did it go?
Did you catch the ghosts?

Yup.

Did they give you any trouble?

Nope.

You guys sure are tight-lipped
all of a sudden.

After all, you're just a dude.

Hey, when you call me that, smile.

-[all] You're a dude!
-[camera clicks]

Great shot, guys.

[Peter] And best of all, we did it
without Slimer getting in the way.

He'll never know what he missed.

[taunts] Na, na, na, na, na.

[blowing raspberry]

[sighs]

[snores]

[theme music playing]