05x07 - Napoleon Bonafrog: Colossus of the Swamps

[bunniefuu]

♪♪ [theme song]

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Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Heroes in a half shell ♪

♪ Turtle power ♪

♪ They're the world's ♪

♪ Most fearsome
fighting team ♪

We're really hip.

♪ They're heroes
in the half shell ♪

♪ And they're green ♪

Hey, get a grip.

♪ When the evil Shredder
attacks ♪

♪ These turtle boys
don't cut him no slack ♪

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♪ Teenage Mutant
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♪ Splinter taught them
to be ninja teens ♪

He's a radical rat.

♪ Leonardo leads ♪

♪ Donatello does machines ♪

That's a fact, Jack.

♪ Raphael is cool,
but rude ♪
Gimme a break.

♪ Michelangelo
is a party dude ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant
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♪ Teenage Mutant
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♪ Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Heroes in a half shell ♪

♪ Turtle power ♪

Hurry, compadre.

Relax, Michelangelo.

Came out of sewers.

Scope it out.
My favorite literature.

Comic books!

Huh, likes comic books.
Amazing!

Mushroom Man?
Super Wombat?

The Teen Twinkies?

How can you read this junk?

Junk? Get off
the planet, bud.

I don't believe it.
It's not here.

What's not here?

The most ultramondo,

fantabulouso comic in the
entire universe, Bugman!

Likes Bugman,
unbelievable!

Excuse me,
mister news vendor dude,

but, like, what happened
to the new issue of Bugman?

Bugman? They don't
publish it no more.

What?

But it's the greatest
comic book of all time!

So go complain
to the publisher.

Now move along.
This ain't no library!

No more Bugman.

What am I going to do
with my spare time?

Well, there's
always the opera.

[laughing]
At last!

I can discover exactly
where their lair is.

Come on, Michelangelo,
so what if you can't get
the comic anymore.

You know the real Bugman.

Whoa, you're right.

I actually met the dude.

He told me how a lab accident
fused Brick Bradley's genes

with those of some insects.

And how whenever
he got cheesed off,

he'd turn
into a horrendous bug.

I even discovered
his secret identity.

Some secret identity--
the whole world knows about it.

Well, that's because
some dude spied on him

and then put all that stuff
in the comic book.

Oh, what a coup.

Soon I'll have
precise directions
to the Turtle's lair.

I think they went...this way.

So, if The Adventures of Bugman
was such a best-seller,

why'd they stop publishing it?

Better yet, how come you
never heard from him
after you saved his life?

Face it, Michelangelo,
fame just went
to his antennae.

Maybe we ought to go
check on the dude.

Nah, I'd rather just relax and
enjoy a little peace and quiet.

[alarm]

What is that?

It's the new sewer intruder
alert system I just installed.

[beeping]

Someone's heading
toward the lair.

We'd better
find out who it is before
they get too close.

I'll find where those Turtles
live no matter what it takes.

Uh-oh.

You! Hold it right there!

Hey, what are you doing
down here, pal?

Nothing.

Oh, yeah?

Well, you sure
picked a strange place
to do it in, pal.

What's this?

Also nothing.

He's got plenty
of nothing.

These sewers are dangerous.

You shouldn't be down
here unless you know
what you're doing,

like us.

[pipe creaking]

Time for me
to get out of here!

Whoa!

Well, at least
we're all okay.

Oh, no, we're not.

[Leonardo]
Come on, fellas, lift!

Man, where is that
little geekazoid?

[Donatello]
I'm afraid he's long gone.

My students, are you hurt?

Nah, only our feelings.

I've got the distinct
impression that guy
was drawing a map to our lair.

We must be on our guard against
anyone finding the lair.

But the disappearance
of Brick Bradley
troubles me more.

You're right, Master Splinter,

I have to find out what
happened to my compadre Brick.

Okay, the rest of us
will scour the sewers

and try to find
that little twerp.

Oh, sure, give us
the glamour jobs.

Good thing I found
Brick's address.

I must find out everything
about Michelangelo.

[alarm]

Out of the way, wimp!

No, wait, we'll take
him as a hostage.

Michelangelo!
Save me!

Cowabunga!

Hey, dude, how'd you
know who I was?

You!

Me?

So like,
who are you anyway?

[Man]
Jerry Spiegel.

[Michelangelo]
How come you've been following
me and my compadres?

Don't go away!

Whoa, dudes!

Come out with hands up!

All right, Spiegel, I'm going
to ask you one more time--

Oh, that dude's as slippery
as a greasy pepperoni.

Maybe April has the
skinny on him.

[Irma]
Sorry, Michelangelo,

but April's out
covering a robbery at
a genetic engineering lab.

I'll see if the news files
have anything
on this Spiegel guy.

It says he achieved brief fame
as the writer and artist

of The Adventures
of Bugman comic book.

That little geek did
the greatest comic book
of all time?

But why's he following us?

I better find out just why
the bug book was cancelled.

It says here that
the editor of Bugman Comics
is Juliet Schmooze.

Why don't you ask her?

Mondo notion, dudette.

[Woman]
Ah, Miss Schmooze?

Someone's calling
from the Channel 6 newsroom.

Hmm, could be free publicity.
Julia Schmooze speaking!

[Michelangelo]
Yeah, I want to know why you
dudes cancelled Bugman,

the most totally epic
comic book ever?

I agree!

Bugman was the most original
comic book since Insect Man,

until it turned out
there really was a Bugman.

You see, the real Bugman
slapped us with a lawsuit

and we had to
cancel the comic.

Holy guacamole.

What's the matter?

I think the little dude
is planning to do
a comic book about us.

But if he tells the world
where your lair is,

and your favorite pizza place,

and how you're friends
with me and April--

Exactamundo.

We'll have the whole world
down on our shells,

not to mention Shredder
and Krang.

But why would anyone
steal insects,
Professor Higginbottom?

Here at Designer Genes

we produce only the finest
custom-designed life forms.

And what was unusual
about these missing insects?

They're termites.

But thanks to our genetic
alteration,

they eat metal,
concrete, and plastic.

One final question, Professor,

wasn't that kind
of a stupid idea?

What do you mean?

If those termites get loose,

they could cause panic
throughout the city,

along with mass destruction.

Well, I suppose
they could, but--

This is April O'Neil,
happy hour news,
signing off.

[phone ringing]

April here.

April, you're running late!

You're due to cover
the opening of the
Conspicuous Consumption

shopping mall in ten minutes.

I'm on my way, Chief!

They spurned me,
but I'll show them.

I stole you termites
for a very specific purpose.

The hypno ray will put
you under my command.

Perfect!

Now, my pets,
go out and destroy.

Soon, the whole world

will feel the deadly slap
of The Swatter!

Yes, my pets, bug off!

Ha ha ha ha!

Destroy for your master,
The Swatter!

Now to commence the next phase
of my master plan.

Being a bad guy is such fun.

Brick Bradley?

Why, I threw that
troublemaker out
months ago.

The insect enemy of injustice,
a troublemaker?

Sure, the place was swarmed
with comic book fans
day and night.

But the dude is the idol
of millions.

Oh, who cares?

At least now I've got some
peace and quiet around here.

Oh, here, he left me
this forwarding address.

Man, this is turning
into a wild bug chase.

[April]
The Conspicuous Consumption
shopping mall is empty now,

but in an hour
it will be filled with
hordes of shoppers.

The owners couldn't have asked
for a more perfect day.

The sun is shining,
the skies are clear,

and the only cloud
on the horizon

seems to be headed
straight toward us!

What in the world?

Ladies and gentlemen,
could these be
the genetically-bred

super termites
that were stolen from
Designer Genes?

Where are you going?
This is big news!

Make that bad news.

Well, that was a big
waste of time.

Yeah, there wasn't a trace
of that little weirdo.

I wonder what he's
up to anyway.

Let's see what's on the news.

This is April O'Neil,

live from the
Conspicuous Consumption mall,

which is being eaten
by a bunch of super termites.

Uh-oh.
Do you know what
this means?

Oh, no, let me guess.

We're about to go shopping.

All right, you insects,

this building now
belongs to The Swatter!

Yes, go on, get!
Shoo-fly, shoo!

Now, to the roof.

Kazam! Ha ha!

With this transmitting
equipment,

I can complete my trap
for those Turtles.

I've got to get out of here.

[buzzing]

Oh, no!

I've heard of being bugged,
but this is ridiculous.

Got you!

Leonardo.

Boy, this place sure
is falling apart.

April, I scoped out
your crisis at a TV store
and came most pronto.

Where have you been?

You know that little dweeb
who's been following us?

Well, he followed
Brick Bradley, too.

He put all of Brick's
secrets in a comic book

and he's going to do
the same thing to us
if we don't stop him.

Uh, guys, we have a bigger
problem at the moment.

Right, termites!

What are we going to do?

There isn't enough
bug spray in the entire
city to stop them.

My bud Brick Bradley
could stop him.

With his super-insect powers,

he'd make that whole
swarm buzz off.

Forget it, Michelangelo.
Your bug man has bugged out.

What the heck?

[Swatter]
Attention.
I am The Swatter!

The Swatter?

Just what this city needs,
another super villain.

[Swatter]
You have seen what damage
my little pets can do.

I want the
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

You will meet me at the top
of the Entire State Building

in one hour, or else
my faithful little bugs

will chew this city apart.

Michelangelo, now you have
to find Brick Bradley.

Why? We can shellac
this jerk easily.

Him, yes, but we need Bugman
to stop those termites.

I have Brick's new address.

Well, go find him.

The rest of us will try
to find out

what this Swatter
character is up to.

And I'm going to follow
those termites.

Happyvale Meditation Center.

Omni...money...

Whoa, Brick, old compadre!

Michelangelo, peace,
my brother.

Like, dude, what are
you doing in this place?

After people found
out I was Bugman,

I was hounded by fans,
reporters,

would-be super villains,

but thanks to
the meditation techniques
I've learned here,

I've found inner peace.

I can completely
control my anger.

I don't ever have
to worry about turning
into Bugman again.

Omni...omni...

Oh, man, did he ever
pick a bad time
to find inner peace.

Thanks to the inner tranquility
I've gained here,

I never get angry,

and I'll never have to worry
about becoming Bugman again.

That's, like,
totally bodacious, Brick,

but us Turtles
have a serious problem.

Sorry, I'm feeling far too
serene to worry about it.

But the whole city's in danger.

Hey, that's
the city's karma, man.

Omay...Larry...

Curly...Shirley...

Sorry, dude, but you
are coming with me.

I am one with the universe.

Nothing can make me
turn into Bugman.

But you have to turn
into Bugman.

And if that means
making you angry,

dude, I intend
to seriously honk you off.

[Vernon]
I don't believe it.

What's going on?

April just phoned.

It's a swarm of super termites!

She's out in the field
covering it!

Oh, I just hope
they don't cover her.

[Vernon]
Is it just me, or do they seem
to be heading this way?

They're heading this way.

Then I'm heading that way.

Where are those
miserable Turtles?

I can't wait
all day for this!

The wait is over, Swatter!

At last.

Exactly what is so amusing?

[Raphael]
What are you supposed to be,

a cheap imitation
of Shredder?

Wait until old Shred Head

finds out you
ripped off his costume.

I'll teach you
to laugh at me!

You are about to be swatted
by The Swatter!

[Michelangelo]
Come on, Brick,

you just got to get angry
and turn into Bugman.

The city's on the brink
of total disaster.

[Brick]
The city must take
responsibility

for its own space, man.

But those bugs are trashing
entire buildings.

I cannot be concerned
with material things.

I've got to make
this dude mad.

You call yourself a hero?

you're nothing
but a wimped-out crumb.

Your insults don't bother me.

I've found true tranquility.

Hey, who's supposed to be
getting ticked off here,

him or me?

Hiyah!

I can see this calls
for some serious bug tactics.

Come on, Turtles!

Oh, good tactic, Swatter,
hit us with a sheet.

Eww! Yuck!

What the heck is this...stuff?

Now, you're trapped
by my super fly paper!

But where's Michelangelo?

And where's that Bugman?

Maybe they got stuck someplace.

They better show up.

In the mean time, I have
a few questions for you.

Like what?

Well, like, who are your
favorite rock stars?

What's your favorite thing
to put on pizza?

Tell me everything
about you!

A villain we can
handle, but a fan?

Look!

[loud buzzing]

Say, Brick, old amigo,

didn't you have kind
of a thing for April O'Neil?

April?

Yes, a truly evolved
young woman.

I thought she
and I might be soul mates.

Well, I got news
for you, dude,

that's where she works,

and if those little
motor mouths

chow that building down,
you can kiss her good-bye.

What?

Those nasty insects
threatening my
would-be soul mate?

All right!
He's getting bummed out.

It makes me so mad
to think about it!

A poor, sweet,
innocent flower like April

menaced by a bunch
of wretched bugs!

Brick, is that you?

Oh, hi, April.

Those filthy, horrible bugs!

Poor April! April?

Oh, man, talk
about rotten timing.

What a relief.

I thought you were in danger.

The whole city
is in danger, Brick.

What are you doing
in that stupid get-up?

What do you mean stupid?

Well, frankly, you look like
a pile of unwashed sheets.

These are the robes
of one who has found
true tranquility!

You don't sound very
tranquil to me.

Oh, yeah?

It so happens,
I've spent months
practicing inner peace.

Is that why you're turning
red in the face?

I'll have you know,

I'm a very peaceful person!

All right,
April, you did it!

You made him mad!

Bugman lives again!

All right, dude!

Now, get rid
of those termites!

Hear me, fellow insects,
leave this place.

Go back to where
you came from,

and never harm
anyone again!

Bodacious, now let's
go swat The Swatter.

What's your favorite
vacation hideaway?

If you could be a tree,
what kind would you be?

Who's the most
dangerous super villain
you ever fought?

I don't know,
but you are easily
the most annoying.

Now don't get fresh
with me, Turtle.

I want to know everything
about you, do you hear?

Everything!

All right, Swatter,
prepare to be bugged.

Bugman!

I've been waiting
a long time for this.

Hang on, compadres.
I'll cut you loose!

Oh, you infernal insect!

My bug zapper rays
will clip your wings.

Come on, get me loose
before I go buggy.

These rays don't sting
as much as I will.

This will
exterminate you, roach.

Bug spray!

Thanks, Donatello!

Uh-oh.

[Turtles]
Turtle power!

All right, bug brain,
just what are you after anyway?

And why are you
dressed up like a cheap
rip-off of Shredder?

Bugman,
you may do the honors.

[sirens wailing]

[All]
Jerry Spiegel?

All right, nerd noggin,
spill it!

I had to learn
everything about you guys

to do my new
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle
comic book.

Wouldn't it have been easier
just to think up
an original idea?

Original idea?
What's that?

I've never had
an original idea in my life.

Well, you'll have
plenty of time to think
some up...in jail.

[Brick]
Thanks to you Turtles,

I can find a new
secret identity

and live a normal
life again.

And we won't have to worry

about the whole city
knowing where we live.

So long, green friends.

If you ever need
help fighting crime,

you can count on...Bugman!

Can you imagine anyone

publishing a comic book
about us?

Aw, man, that has got
to be the dumbest idea
I've ever heard.

You're right, dude,
the whole concept
is mondo bizarro.

Come on, admit it, dudes.

You read it, too.

♪♪ [theme]