03x15 - Two for the Zoo/The Swine in the Stone

[bunniefuu]

♪ Hakuna matata ♪

♪ what a wonderful phrase ♪

♪ hakuna matata ♪

♪ ain't no passing craze ♪

♪ it means no worries ♪

♪ for the rest of your days ♪

♪ it's our problem-free ♪

♪ philosophy ♪

♪ hakuna matata ♪

♪ yeah! ♪

♪ Hakuna matata! ♪

♪ Timon and Pumbaa! ♪

♪ Hakuna matata! ♪

♪ It means no worries ♪

♪ for the rest of your days ♪

♪ it's our problem-free ♪

♪ philosophy ♪

♪ hakuna matata ♪

♪ Timon and Pumbaa ♪

Ooh!

Sorry, my bug-eyed morsel,

but I'm the predator
and you're my prey.

Hey!

Okay. Now you're the
predator and I'll pray.

I thought I didn't
have a prayer.

Bag one buzzard, check.

Another cage filled for the zoo.

The zoo? He's putting
critters in cages.

That's bad. Don't you
think that's bad, Timon?

No, Pumbaa, it's good.

Now those critters won't
have to hunt for lunch

while worrying about being
somebody else's dinner.

It's a win-win.

But they lose-lose
their freedom.

Pumbaa, Pumbaa.

Freedom's just another
word for nothing left to eat.

And as one very famished feline,

I think we should spruce
ourselves up, hose ourselves off

and get ourselves captured
in time for afternoon tea.

Well, if it'll make
you happy, Timon,

I guess I'll go ahead and let
myself be captured by the zoo.

Thank you.

Perhaps we should take a
little nap before we get started.

Wait, Timon, it's a trap.

Land one lion, check.

Sorry about that, Mr. Lion.

Now remember, Pumbaa,
we want to get captured.

So don't save us.

Now we'll simply stand under the
crate, let go of the rope and presto,

we're two for the zoo.

Here, hold this.

Can't be in the zoo without
proper dental hygiene.

- Okay, let's do it.
- Okay.

Huh?

Pumbaa, where's
the end of the rope?

If you had to secure the rope,

couldn't you have secured
it to something more secure?

Rustle up one rhino, check.

Okay, here we go again.

We pull down on the rope.
We're pulled up in the net.

Then it's feeding time at
the zoo. Got it, Pumbaa?

Got it, Timon.

Hey, Harry, could
you lend us a hand?

Grab one gorilla, check.

Ow!

Snag one snake, check.
All done. Thanks, boys.

Okay, last chance, Pumbaa.

We'll hitch a ride
by hiding inside.

They don't look
very happy, Timon.

They'll be happy
when they get there.

But maybe we should stay here.

You know, hold down the fort,
keep the home fires burning.

Save our skins.

You know, thanks to quint, it's no
longer abuzzard-lion-rhino-gorilla

and snake-eat-meerkat
and-warthog-world.

With them in the zoo,
there's no competition

and plenty of cuisine.

Oh.

Oh.

That does it. Tell me what's on
your mind before I go out of mine.

Timon, I feel bad
about the buzzard, lion,

rhino, gorilla and snake.

We shouldn't have
helped quint catch them.

We didn't help quint
on purpose, Pumbaa.

We accidentally helped him
because we're stupid, clumsy and inept.

Therefore, it's not
our responsibility.

We have an abundance of food.

And I'm not gonna get a bite while
they're behind bars, am I, Pumbaa?

Well, no.

Gee, Timon, taking
the bus to the zoo

was a lot easier than
trying to get captured.

Here's the deal.

I'll tell quint that
helping him capture

those critters was all
a misunderstanding.

Then he'll set them free

and you'll stop staring at
me with those big sad eyes.

- I know why you're here.
- You do?

Certainly, but usually the
snake food is delivered in back.

We're not delivering snake food.

Of course not.

You are the snake food.

Now this is a misunderstanding.

Don't even think about it.

Pumbaa, I don't think trying to rescue
these guys was such a good idea.

Are you kidding, Timon?
I think he's glad to see us.

He's giving us a... a hug.

When you land on a
porcupine, you sure know it.

Here's what I know.

We're leaving.

Oi. Pumbaa, that's more
painful than those porcupines.

All right, all right,
we'll free 'em, but

to do it we gotta
stay free ourselves.

Hey, you two. There's
a cage to clean.

Look, Timon, it's...
our worst nightmare.

Nothing's broken.

Maybe things are
starting to come our way.

You mean like that
hungry-looking lion?

Yikes!

I don't think this lion's
gonna be hungry much longer.

I thought so.

- Look, Timon.
- Huh?

Video games.

Pumbaa, don't touch that dial.

I'm not quite sure
what you did, Pumbaa,

but I'm pretty sure you
shouldn't have done it.

Oh!

Well, Pumbaa, you
wanted them to be free.

I hope you're happy.

You know, Timon,

I'm not quite as happy
as I thought I'd be.

You're very own cage. That
ought to keep you two out of trouble.

You know, Timon, you were right.

Being locked up in the
zoo isn't that bad after all.

How do you figure that, Pumbaa?

For one thing, now we're safe
from all our natural predators.

Yeah, but what about
our unnatural predators?

Here we are children,
the petting zoo.

Help! Help!

Pumbaa, that sword
ain't coming out of there.

Looks stuck pretty good, Timon.

Squires!

So how goes the sword-removing
business, your lordness?

Horrid, horrible.

I will remove the famed sword
Excalibur from this accursed stone.

One o'clock lunchtime.

- Great, I'm starved.
- Me too.

Not so fast.

I'm going to lunch.

You two are going to
pull Excalibur out for me.

We are?

Yes, and you will
do it by two o'clock.

For that is the hour when I am
to fight the really mean dragon

from over hill, and I need
the sword Excalibur to do it.

So if you do not pull that
sword out by two o'clock,

I'm going to be very,
very, very angry with you.

And you remember what happens

when I get very, very,
very angry, don't you?

Uh-oh.

What are you uh-oh-ing for?

It's just removing a sword
from a stone for Pete's sake.

How hard could it be?

Okay, Pumbaa, grab a
hold of my legs and pull me

and I'll pull this sword out.

I think it's almost out.

What?

How many times have I told you
not to talk with your mouth full?

Now what did you say?

I said I'm losing my grip.

You don't say? We're
gonna need a plan.

Why don't we just tell our knight
we can't get the sword out either?

I'm sure he'll understand.

Are you crazy, Pumbaa?

He'd k*ll us and
that's just the start.

Need a break. Must think.

I got it, Timon.

Why don't we suck the
sword out of stone somehow?

Wait. I got it.

We'll get a vacuum
cleaner to suck it out.

That's a great idea
you had, Timon.

But vacuum cleaners
haven't been invented yet.

Always with the logic.

There. One vacuum
cleaner invented.

Oops.

Pumbaa, our troubles are over.

I traded the knight's horse
for this sword magnet.

Sword magnet?

Yep, guaranteed to pull
a sword out of anything.

Hey, this thing doesn't
work. I've been ripped off.

Timon, the instructions say,

"for use on all swords
except Excalibur."

Oh, that's just great.

I don't want this thing.

What? I told you not to
talk with your mouth full.

I can't understand a
word you're saying.

I said if you just throw
the magnet away,

maybe the swords
will leave us alone.

Oh. Yeah.

Squires, come here.

You've pulled Excalibur then?

Well, your highness, we
tried, but, uh, you know...

Of course we did, your
armored lordishness.

Here you go. One
Excalibur sword.

Are you sure this
is the Excalibur?

Because if this is not Excalibur,
and you're trying to fool me,

I'll be awfully angry.

Could be a mistake.

At two o'clock, the real Excalibur
better be pulled and waiting for me.

Pumbaa, look, there's
some writing on Excalibur.

"Congratulations on the purchase
of your very own Excalibur.

"For tech support, call
the lady of the lake."

Who's the lady in the lake?

I have no idea, Pumbaa,
but we're gonna find out.

Well, this must be the place.

Oh, lady!

Oh.

Hey, you kids, stop
throwing rocks at my house.

Sorry, mister.

We're just looking
for the lady of the lake.

She ain't home right now.

I'm the man of the
lake. What do you want?

Well, sir, we have one
of your Excalibur swords

stuck in a rock and we
can't seem to get it out.

- Did you try pulling on it?
- Yes.

Oh. Well, the lady of the
lake usually handles swords.

What do you handle?

The pancake of doom.

Behold the pancake of doom.

Heyah!

It's a well-known fact that
dragons are notoriously afraid

of certain breakfast foods.

At two o'clock, I'm coming
back to get Excalibur.

You both know what's gonna
happen if it's not pulled when I return.

You know, Timon, that hurts.

Why don't we just tell 'em we
can't pull the Excalibur sword out?

Because I like life.

Hey, look, the rock cracked.

Pumbaa, that's it. We've
been doing this all wrong.

Instead of pulling the sword
out, let's just break the rock.

Almost two o'clock.

I hope this works, Timon.

Look!

We did it.

- Hakuna matata, Timon!
- Yahoo! Whee!

Okay, here it comes. I got it.

Timon, you think maybe
it's not such a good idea

to be trying to catch a three-foot
long, razor-sharp magical weapon.

Hmm. Good point.

Okay, squires, two o'clock.

Hand me Excalibur
and be quick about it.

Excalibur. Yes, of course.

Let me just finish
dusting it here.

The dragon!

My sword Excalibur.

Sir, I think this would be
a good time to tell you...

Your sword is ready.

At last Excalibur is mine.

I can't watch.

I give up! I give up already.

You two never pulled
the sword from the stone.

I wanted to tell you.

Actually, we did sort of.

And then it flew into
another rock and then...

Oh, please, not the face.

Well, I think I will
keep this new weapon.

How many times do I have to tell
you not to talk with your mouth full?

Sheesh!