02x04 - First Shark

[bunniefuu]

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strange

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[Applause]

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with all of them

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ladies and gentlemen of the press may i

present vice president ripster press

secretary streaks security director jab

you're doing fine gentlemen couldn't do

my job without you

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tidy yourself up a bit director chap you

look like you buy your clothes at garage

sales

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i'll slam you for good this time

president slammer

never fear slammers here

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little bit lazy fins you gotta see this

yo slam ooh

where are you guy oh i was just uh jab

what's going on

come on check it out paranoid's in

washington

what are those things

yeah

these monstrosities are dr robert

bolton's work i've brought them here to

let the president see firsthand the

dangers of unregulated genetic

engineering

whoa

no way bud those things aren't going

anywhere near the president i designed

this security receptacle myself it's

made of impenetrable steel and has three

separate locking systems i must impress

upon president horn the horrors of gene

slamming

let me add you you you

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i'd be careful box they seem to like you

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today i am presenting the presidential

medal of honor to the world-renowned

scientist and pride of fishing state

university dr luther paradigm for his

invaluable contributions to genetic

science

dr paradise

huh chummer is he nuts who made that

bozoid the president shh

look thank you mr president genetic

engineering can be extremely dangerous

in the hands of mad men like dr bolton a

man who genetically combined his own

sons with savage uncontrollable shark

dna

that's not true

about dad

ah that sickoid liar he's gonna pay for

that

cool it guys why did paranoid have to

poison president horn against us

now i'll never get to meet him that

reeks uh who voted for that cheese ball

he's a great president who's he gonna

honor next dracula cool it guys

don't you see paranoid's up to something

why else would he take those slimoid

sevenths to dc

we gotta find out what

but how

we don't even know where his lab is yeah

so we better haul finn and find it

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i can always sniff a series

yeah i'm catching one up ahead

smells worse than a 10-day old trout

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here they come

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shrimp louie just who we were looking

for

oh yeah what a coincidence i was looking

for you too i've had it with doc piranha

face he treats me worse than a mangy old

dogfish so does that mean you might lead

us to a secret lab are you kidding sure

yeah put the creepers way out of

business

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come on this way

right in there

make my day show it down to sawdust okay

it's locked

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easily remedy

right let's trash the place first we

find out what paranoid's up to then we

trash the place

if you who are gonna get dressed

ah man we've been had by a shrimp well

three shots i hoped you'd come sniffing

around while i was away since you won't

be escaping this two-foot thick titanium

compression box anytime soon i might as

well let you in on my latest triumph i

refer to it as gene washing

shark attack

and if you do ever manage to get out

you'll find a brand new america

president horn will be totally under my

control

why you

gene slamming the president would be a

little too obvious for the american

people but gene washing is perfectly

undetectable think of it all those

millions of americans to experiment on

the possibilities are

staggering

farewells treat you

oh man the walls are compressing first

one on was a trip to d.c

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minimal indentation guys this isn't

working

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what a head case that paradigm seems as

if he's got a few chromosomes loose

himself dr paradigm is a genius he will

reinvent the world i don't know about

that

how'd you get in here didn't the vice

president tell you i brought some gene

slammed monstrosities so you could see

genetic engineering at its nightmarish

worst i've really been too busy dr p

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what

you will come with us

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what are you staring at nothing good

don't take your eyes off them boys

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uh

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[Applause]

i don't think so russell what's wrong

with you that's the beauty of my new

process called the gene wash mr

president it's undetectable

and for your information it was

developed especially for you

guys listen this isn't working how about

rolling the thing sure why not yeah

dorsal slam

dorsal slam

slam

dorsal slab

dorsal clamp

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all right burger time order that to go

munchmeister we gotta get to dc asap

relax mr president vice president

russell will do an excellent job while

you're away being gene washed you will

make the perfect team

and i'll have countless millions to

experiment on

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our nation's capital dudes can't get too

close or they'll send a couple of

fighter jets after us

security's tight be careful

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all right first stop the white house

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yeah

all cassette tapes

richard nixon huh

this could be interesting forget that

look it's a map of the white house and

it looks like we're

just about where we want to be

i smell sevious they were here

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arrest them who are you and where's the

president we were wondering about that

ourselves wise guy cough him ah no one's

cuffing me especially you flattop cool

it jab these guys are just doing their

job

they went this way guys hey where do you

think you're going i gotta save the

president stop him

gotcha paranoid

a secret tunnel

headbanging time

consider that medal of honor revoked

mr president

it's you it's really you street shock

grab him

whoa mr president this is such an honor

my friends call me slamoo pleased to

meet you any foe that maniac is a friend

of mine i was going to use this

president horn so you'd end up something

like that but since you're such a

charmer i think i'll use this

and you'll end up something like that

no

slam me not him

please he's the president how patriotic

however i pledge allegiance to myself

and to the science for which i stand

one geneticist who's answered his call

dedicatedly to bring genetic mutation to

all

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[Laughter]

a place in the history books is yours

the first gene slammed president the

first of a master race designed by me

no don't do it unfortunately the

american public probably won't stand for

it and russell will have to take your

place

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stop that shock i'm warning you kalimari

i can do far worse to you move it

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mr vice president soon to be mr

president this way please you've got to

believe us it's paradigm who's kidnapped

the president he's got this totally

undetectable process called gene washing

right i'm gonna believe this from you

take him away

what was that

that shark has got the president get him

they wouldn't listen to us guys so let's

kick some fin

about time

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hold your fire you morons you'll hit the

president what are you cia

oh now you gonna make me mad

oh that hurts

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let's go someplace a little quieter and

talk this over not back in the ground

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yeah thank you slammu you saved my life

it was an honor mr president

um well are you gonna introduce us oh

yeah uh these are my brothers ripster

jab and the homely one's streaks

gentlemen my heartfelt thanks i heard

you were outlaws but now i guess i know

better now it will be my honor to

correct this whole misunderstanding in

order vox to lock up that demented

paradigm and lose the key wait

they told you i had a new gene washing

technique didn't they yes but i didn't

believe them good because it's the

street sharks who have this incredible

gene washing ability they'll gene-wash

the president almost certainly already

have mr vice president what should i do

genetic science growth industry

amazing potential reduce unemployment

listen to the doctor he knows best if

the president starts spouting absurd

accusations like the street sharks are

innocent or they didn't kidnap me then

we'll know he's been gene washed

but who knows what they will make the

president do

you'll have to arrest him vox he'll be a

menace to national security and then the

vice president takes over

thank you sorry sir it's not gonna work

no rip he's gonna square everything away

if he tries to lock him up and toss the

key

barricade the door uh why what's going

on

why don't you just lock it it's seven

inch reinforced steel oh sure

uh i still don't get this piranha it's

got us in a bind we know you're in there

street sharks

we know you have the president open up

or we'll blow the door down there are

secret passages under the white house

right must not be much of a secret

anymore

listen i was gonna go out there and tell

the truth about you but now i have my

doubts

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hold it

as soon as he says the sharks didn't

kidnap him you'll know he's been gene

washed

arrest the street sharks they kidnapped

me hurry they're getting away

you heard the man don't just stand there

get those street sharks radial and

gilamari will pay for this it's all

their fault

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[Applause]

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these tunnels are wild which way

rush hour uh we're long gone out of the

white house somewhere in dc we set the

rendezvous for the washington monument

which

way uh what's that look like big tall

pointy pencil shaped building what do

you see

uh i don't know big old stone house on

the hill that's the capital this way

there they are enough with the

sightseeing bro hurry box is right on

our dorsal

this one i know

shout out

how can you think about burgers at a

time like this uh i always think about

burgers they're catching up let's hop in

i know that sound

that's ben's in the road river

yes buddy hey swinging around

whoa dude

yo ben we gotta find the washington

monument pronto it's right there dudes i

find

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am i pleased to see you

mr president our good blood bends bent

the president of the united states of

america cool

paradigm and that gene washed vice

president of mine convinced vox that if

i show the slightest suspicious behavior

like supporting you guys they'll have to

dump me out of office and lock me up gee

mr president you took a huge risk coming

to see us but don't worry i convinced

them i've blocked out what i know about

them but the least i could do was bring

you a token of my appreciation yamango

burgers extra mustard i'm voting for

this guy

enough with the mr president stuff call

me dave

sure thing dave as the president of the

united states i promise that i will not

rest until the world sees you for the

heroes you are especially you slammu i

owe you a special dent my friend what's

wrong oh maybe it's dumb but i always

dreamed about being president myself one

day now i'm always gonna be a fugitive

on the run you underestimate the power

of the presidency slammoo i will see you

exonerated and when i do who knows

anybody can become president in this

country of ours even a shark

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deep