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Muri and Ko (2024)

Comedy Movie Collection.
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Comedy Movie Collection.

Muri and Ko (2024)

Post by bunniefuu »

[pop music playing]

[pop music continues]

[indistinct dialogue]

[hailing] Ah, Muri oh!

What's up? Yeah. Small boy.

- Well done.

- Thank you.

Ah. My Auntie!

C'mon, everyone...

[Aunty in Pidgin] She's not at home.

- Ah-ah.

- Mm-hm.

Mama, calm down.

What do you mean she's not at home?

Are we quarreling?

Do you see me with sticks or cutlasses?

I said she's not around.

She's not at home.

You, you're not okay.

You're not okay.

Are you not ashamed of yourself?

You disgrace me every day.

You disgrace me in the morning,

in the afternoon and in the evening.

Are you not tired?

Where's my thrift money?

Pay me what you owe me!

You will get your thrift money.

There's money in here my pocket.

That pocket is torn.

It seems you've gone crazy.

It's all the money that tore my pocket.

- [scoffs]

- And I will spend it on you until you run.

Let me tell you something,

until you pay the interest you owe me,

I have seized all your belongings.

Pickers and loaders don't fight.

We stick together.

Shay, baby.

I just love you. I did not k*ll anyone.

- Take it easy with yourself.

- Is it because you love me

- that you want to suffocate me?

- [Aunty] Sorry.

- Sorry.

- Why do you suffocate me?

No problem. About the money...

Shay baby, I will send it to you.

But...

- What is it?

- Our relationship has ended.

- Take your smelly body out of here.

- Are you referring to me this way?

Wise man, well done.

Come in, wise one.

There's no chance.

Pay the money you owe. Debtor.

Shay baby.

- [Aunty scoffs]

- Muri's babe.

Muri the picker.

Shay baby

Muri's babe the great picker

Don't allow them matter

Beside the picker, eh, eh

- What is this?

- Shay baby

Muri's babe the great picker

Shay baby

Muri's babe the great picker

Don't allow them matter

Beside the picker

- Shay baby, eh..

- [Aunty] Ah!

Leave it to her! Yeah!

What is it? Step back!

But you know I love you.

Auntie, please let him enter.

Enter where? No way!

- There's no way you're coming in.

- My babe

- said I should enter.

- You cannot enter! No way!

Pay what you owe! Pay.

Shay baby, it shouldn't be like this.

You're just looking at me like that. Huh!

What?

Take your smelly body away from here.

Are you deaf? Leave here! Go away!

[phone chimes]

- No problem.

- No space for you here.

[lively music playing]

Why didn't Shay baby

let me change my clothes?

I stink like a he-goat.

Okay! The king is here.

What is happening on the streets?

This one won't have money.

She's carrying fake things.

Chukwudi! I'm sure

he only has a plier in his pocket.

What's happening today?

Aunty, get out! It's 400 naira she

withdrew at the POS stand.

[huffs] What's actually happening today?

Everywhere seems dry, eh!

[woman in English] I'm coming. Come

- to this place.

- [Muri] Nice one! I have found my prey.

Correct iPhone 15.

- [woman] You can't find me? Keep coming.

- C'mon, Muri, Muri...

-Muri...-

-You can see me.

- Yes.

- be smart.

[suspenseful music playing]

- Uh. Let go!

- Hey! My bag.

- It's gone.

- [woman yelling] Hey! My bag!

- [screams]

- It's gone.

- Help me! My bag!

- [man screaming] Thief!

[Muri] I succeeded

even though I almost had an accident.

What's this? [scoffs]

Does this lady get headaches?

What's she doing with Panadol? Ah-ah!

Is there no money here?

Ah-ah.

[laughs] Muri, you're the real deal.

Ah-ah!

Ah-ah!

Three thousand.

Three thousand! With all my action.

Ah! Muri, you're finished.

You own is finished. Three thousand!

Ah, oh sh*t.

Three thousand. Ah-ah!

Poverty has hugged this lady.

Poverty holds her tight.

Three thousand.

- [exclaims]

- [phone ringing]

[scoffs] Ah!

[scoffs]

- Hello?

- Raski.

[Raski] Ah-ah!

Muritala!

Muri Mezetto!

My brother, what's up?

What's up?

Ah, you don't sound okay.

What happened?

Guy, there's nothing outside.

I rented a bike and hit the streets.

I snatched a bag from someone.

Two thousand five hundred naira.

The owner of the bike

has collected 2500 and I'm left with 500.

Muri, why are you

always behaving like this?

You're still snatching bags at Sabo.

What is wrong with you?

Can't I eat?

POS is the new era.

People don't walk

around with cash anymore.

POS.

Look, my friend...

Let me blow your mind.

Do you know what happened to Lati?

- Yes, what happened to him?

- Just because he stole 500 naira.

500 naira.

He stole 500 naira and he was burnt alive.

Guy, I don't have a choice. Ah!

What is happening, Raski?

Spare parts is the new thing.

If you can remove the emblem

of a car, that is 2000 naira.

If you can remove a side mirror,

that's 5000 naira.

- It's a lie.

- You know what I'll do,

I will help you talk to Chukwudi.

I will help you beg Chukwudi.

Anytime you give Chukwudi

spare parts, he will give you cash.

You will just be selling

to Chukwudi, that's all.

Let's do it. Thank you.

Raski, let's do it. It's good of you.

[upbeat music plays]

[upbeat music plays continues]

I don't have money to give this woman.

See how this one is drinking water.

Uh! Semiat Alatadindin.

And I have eaten to my satisfaction.

See how this one is eating meat.

What will I do now?

I don't have money.

Muri, be wise.

Okay, good. Show her what you're made of.

Ah!

Hello? My friend, what's happening?

Which junction are you at now?

Do you have that jay with you?

Good, when you pass the vulcanizer,

you're 100 meters away from me.

I'm here.

I'm eating at Semiat's place.

Start coming!

If you pass the vulcanizer,

I'm wearing a red shirt.

I will just wait outside and stretch

my hand. When I stretch my hand...

Come back here.

Ah-ah, are you under a spell?

Are you under an evil influence?

Are they playing football on your head?

- Wait. Calm down.

- Please give me my money.

I want to go and collect it.

They are bringing it

and I will bring it to you.

What are they taking and bringing?

Who are you telling that nonsense?

- Pay me for the food you ate.

- Calm down.

Let me go and collect it.

What if he leaves?

- Don't let him go.

- Look,

Muri, you are looking for trouble!

You know you've been doing it for long!

You always come here to eat on credit!

Do you want

to send me back to the village?

- Okay. You've caught me.

- You don't have money?

You have caught me.

Then you will have to work for me.

- Ah!

- Yes.

[enthusiastic music playing]

[scoffs]

A whole Muri.

Muri the great picker has now

turned to Muri the dishwasher.

Because of what?

Ah-ah, what is it?

[sucks teeth]

[lady sucks teeth]

Get away from here.

If it falls and breaks,

it's none of my business.

[spoons clutter]

[sucks teeth]

[phone ringing]

- [sucks teeth]

- [in English] Who's calling now?

- Thank you, my brother.

- What nonsense!

[phone continues ringing]

Eh, yes, what?

What's happening there...

It's two people quarreling.

I'm on my lunch break.

You know I'm a detective.

I'm allowed some lunch break.

And I didn't trouble my boss this way.

Go and settle the matter.

If you can't settle it, call me.

Nonsense.

[utensil clinking]

[woman on TV] Every day,

I wake up to take care of my family.

Everyone asks

why I choose Smiley Cornflakes

as my kid's perfect breakfast.

Well, that's because it

contains every nutrient

needed for kids to thrive.

[detective in Pidgin]

I love this girl too much.

I love her too much.

You know that time

when they were still at Superstar House.

Hey...

[in English] so different.

I used all my salary to vote for her.

- What?

- Yes.

I used my salary. All of it.

Including some savings to vote for her.

[in Pidgin] Come off it. You used what?

- To vote for the girl.

- You?

- Yes.

- You can use your money

[in Pidgin] to vote

for somebody you do not know.

I've done what you asked me to do.

I have washed all the plates.

But based on what I observed,

the plates I washed were

more than the food I ate.

- What do you mean?

- So listen, you owe me

the king food.

Does this place look like your palace?

Give me my phone.

Muri, I have been warning you.

I tell you all the time,

the rubbish you're trying with me,

don't try it with me Semiat again.

It's not your family

that set up this business for me.

Give me my phone.

I have worked for tomorrow's food.

You owe me food for tomorrow.

Muri signs out.

-Look here,

-[Muri] One love.

Any day you allow

this young man come here to eat,

you will lose your job.

Madam, what did he do?

Detective, thank you for asking.

Ah-ah! Every time,

Muri comes to my shop to eat

but doesn't pay.

He eats on credit every time.

Are there other means he uses to pay you?

Perhaps you might have

some other businesses together.

Don't be angry, I'm a detective.

We need to ask the right questions.

Because the man I just saw looks bold.

[lively music playing]

[woman in English] But I'll really love

to see him this weekend.

Hm, Chidinma we talked

about this, remember?

Allow the boy to rest

before you carry camera

and put on his face again. Okay?

- But I really want to...

- Chidinma, [scoffs]

I know you, don't I?

I know you very well.

Please allow him to rest. Yes!

There's nothing wrong

with creating memories,

but I want to see my son soon though.

[in Pidgin] No problem.

[in Igbo] No one will

take your child from you.

Just leave him here to rest.

Let him rest. Okay?

[sighs] [in English] Mommy,

- who said he's not having a...

- Ma'am, we are ready for you.

Um, Mommy,

I'll talk to you later, okay?

Okay.

Give Cole my hugs and kisses. Bye.

Okay. [laughs]

[man] Mommy!

They're calling you.

I think you forgot something there.

- Really? Okay. Thank you.

- Yes ma.

Thank you. What did I forget?

Ah-ah, what could I have forgotten?

Thank you. I'm coming. [sucks teeth]

[in Pidgin] Mama,

you didn't lock your car!

[suspenseful music playing]

Nice one, Muri.

Steal everything. Okay?

Muri takes it all.

Well done.

The great picker. Wow.

Eh, leave it for me.

Well done.

Let's go, move it.

[suspenseful music playing]

[in English] Your gate pass, sir?

Hey! My car!

My car! That's my car!

[in Pidgin] What gate pass?

Didn't you see me drive in?

[in English] I mean, your gate pass.

Sorry.

- Try to stop him! Thief!

- Please, calm down.

- Stop. [heaves]

- [guard panting]

- Madam, please come with me.

- [grunts]

Get out! Get out, idiot.

[thrilling music playing]

[Muri in Yoruba] I have escaped!

[lively music playing]

I have escaped.

[shrieks]

Muri, they said you cannot

be successful, but you have.

Let me not spoil it.

They said you cannot

be successful, but you have.

Muri for now!

Muri forever!

Muri with swag.

Wow!

The don has landed.

[chuckles cheekily]

Guy, if I sell this to Chukwudi,

I should get nothing

less than three million.

When I collect the three million... [tuts]

But Chukwudi is not okay.

That's the problem.

He could say...

let's just say, worst case scenario,

two point five million.

[exclaims, tuts]

But I don't trust Chukwudi.

He might cheat me.

Let me call Raski.

[phone ringing]

Ah-ah, who is calling me?

Hello?

[in Yoruba] Hello Raski, what's up?

A big fish has landed.

It has landed.

- Big fish!

- Ah-ah!

Muri Moratto!

Calm down.

What's up?

What is happening? Tell me.

Guy, it's a car.

Wait a minute.

Ah-ah, what kind of car is it?

- Jeep!

- Sport?

Listen up, do you have someone I can meet

that would be willing

to buy it immediately?

When I sell it,

I'll give Chukwudi a hundred thousand.

I'll give you money too.

Alright. Don't sweat it.

Go to Ikota.

I'll meet you there.

My guy, hurry.

Bad guy who lives beside a church.

Okay, let's do it.

Wow, guy.

My God, I thank you for this blessing.

Thank you for this big blessing.

Thank you!

Hey, leave the road!

[groovy music playing]

[Dinma's mom in English]

None of this is my business.

All I want is my car. Help me find my car!

- I want my car! [crying hysterical]

- [in Yoruba] What is going on?

[in English] What's going on here?

What's happening?

Come on. This is not a market place. Ah!

We were hearing your noise from outside.

[splutters] From outside!

What's the problem?

Sir, we've been trying

to tell her to calm down.

[sobs] Sir! Sir,

help me find my car. Please.

- [detective] Your car. What car?

- All I want is my car.

- What happened to your car?

- [splutters] They stole the car.

- They stole it.

- [detective] Really?

-They stole the car

-You car... stop shouting!

- Ah-ah!

- They stole your car.

[officer] Which...

If we check well,

it will be be a Camry 2003.

No, no, no!

It's a Changan. CS55.

Okay. Your Changan number, give it to him.

The plate number for the...

[officer 1] Plate number! [tuts]

Um... [gasps]

Don't you don't know

the plate number of your car?

Is the car not registered?

The plate number!

Um...

You don't know the plate

number of the car!

- [cries]

- How are we going to find the car?

- [officer 1] How?

- [detective] By texting it?

- It's my daughter's car.

- [detective] Ah!

- [officer 1] Your daughter...

- It belongs to my daughter.

- It's over.

- Where's your daughter now?

- My daughter's at work.

- Okay. At work.

You need to call her to come here.

...know a bit more of this

Dinma they see on TV.

No. They are not really

- interested in that...

- Or do you want us to go,

more private info like your love life...

-Love life? Oh my goodness

-Exactly. And like who's...

- if there's a mister...

- It's your mom.

- My mom. Alright.

- Oh,

- mic check? Check, okay...

- [chuckles] Give me one second please.

- Oh, no problem.

- [Dinma laughs]

- Hello?

- Chidinma?

- Mom?

- They have stolen the car!

What?

How? Where?

[dramatic music playing]

Where is Cole?

Wait...

Cole?

[in Yoruba] Muri, the boss.

- Muri, the big deal!

- Grandma, what's going on...

- [screams]

- [in English] What?!

Ha!

- I have to go.

- [producer] What?

Come and remove this thing.

Remove this thing. I have to go.

- What's going on?

- Remove this thing.

Quickly please! I have to go.

- What's going on?

- My son has been kidnapped.

Oh my God!

[interviewer] What's all this?

[tire screeches]

Wait a minute.

[in Pidgin] How did you enter this car?

[in English] I was on my iPad

since we were going to the mall.

Where is my Grandma?

Ah, Muri. Ah, Muri the great picker!

Car you were supposed to...

Ah, you messed up again.

Ah! Come down! You have messed up.

I don't know you from anywhere. Come down!

- [in English] Wh... What are you doing?

- [in Pidgin] Come down! Good boy...

- come down. Good boy.

- No.

- Come down. Come down.

- Wait.

Come down first. Hurry up.

- Wait.

- Let me show you something.

Come please. Hey,

good boy.

Stand there. Stand there first.

Standing by.

Don't stand on the road

or you'll be hit by a car.

Just stand there.

- Is it your car?

- [Cole] You can't leave me here. Wait!

[Muri in Yoruba] It's that boy. I'm sure.

Grandma, is this one of your pranks?

- Choco boy!

- [in Yoruba] Choco boy! Nice one!

- Whoa!

- We know you. What's up?

- What's up? It is well with you?

- Great child. Why are you

- behaving like you're not?

- Oh how are you? Stop there!

- Don't let him go!

- You can't escape!

- You're not going anywhere.

- Where do you think you're going?

- Where are you going?

- What is wrong with you?

- [thug 1] Big celebrity!

- What's wrong with you? I'll... I'll...

- [indistinct clamoring]

- [Cole screaming] Leave me alone!

- Big celebrity!

- Wow!

- Great child.

- [Muri] My people, what is happening?

Greetings, boss.

- What is happening, brother? Calm down.

- [thug 2] What's wrong with you?

- [Muri] My guys, what's going on?

- [thug 1] See him looking like

- [thug 1] Terminator.

- [Muri] Everybody, calm down.

- What is that...

- Anything for us?

- [thug 3] The Smoke, settle us.

- Alright. Okay. C'mon.

- The don! We hail you!

- C'mon, guys, hang in there.

- [Muri] Alright, c'mon!

- [thug 3] Guys, let's go!

[in English] Shoo! Shoo!

Go away. All of you.

[in Yoruba] Hey, young man. You're

just shouting. They could've taken you.

[in English] What made you come back?

- [thug crowd chatter]

- [Muri] What sort of problem is this?

- Ah, Muri the great picker!

- [Dinma in English] Where's your boss?

[indistinct chatter]

Hello. I'm looking for your boss.

[splutters] And my mother,

my mother and my son. Please.

Calm down. You're in the Police station.

[in Pidgin] Um, check cell two

for that old woman who is a prost*tute.

- Maybe she's the one.

- Her husband has bailed her this morning.

[in English] Where the hell is my mother?!

You're talking about an old woman...

[in Pidgin] Calm down!

And stop hitting the counter.

- Don't you see you're in Police station?

- [in English] Excuse you! I'm here to...

- What is...

- [detective] Oh my goodness!

[in Pidgin] Boss, do you know her?

[in English] What...

Is this you, Miss Chidinma?

Yes. Yes, sir.

So good to see you!

I'm... I'm a big fan!

You don't know her?

This is one of the biggest

- national treasures.

- [officers] Really?

This is a superstar!

- Welcome, Madam.

- You're in my station.

- Yes sir.

- Oh my... look please,

we need to take a selfie.

- No, no, no time for that.

- Pose, pose, pose.

I'm looking for my mother and my son.

My son was kidnapped.

My... my... He was in my car.

He was in my car and my car was stolen.

- And he's in the car.

- My God!

Wait. The son that was

in the car that was stolen?

Yes sir.

- That was your son?

- Yes sir.

And the woman that is making the

statement right now, that's your mother?

- That's my mother.

- Ah! Say no more.

Bring all the files!

[in Pidgin] Okay. But Boss you said

- we shouldn't file it.

- I will break you head!

- All the files here... Bring them out!

- Look for the file. Leave the road.

- [in English] Find file. Every file!

- [officer] Find the file.

[officer 1] I said,

bring out the files out.

- [detective] All hands on deck.

- [officer] Boss, what kind of file?

- We must find this child...

- Boss, we'll find them.

- and this car within the next two hours...

- We'll find it now, Boss.

- or you're dead.

- My Boss, we'll find it.

- Two hours.

- You, go and fuel the car.

- Miss Didi, come with me please.

- [Officer 1] Is the car fueled?

Just... just um...

- Please come to my office. Please.

- Um, are you sure?

[indistinct conversation]

[detective] We will find all those

who did this and bring them right here!

[Cole] So you don't know me?

Who are you?

[sucks teeth]

Not even my mom?

Who is your mother?

What's my business with your mother?

Who is your mother?

Or is your mother... um... Okonjo Iweala?

I don't know your mother.

[in English] My mom is Didi.

But she goes by Dinma now. Remember?

[in Yoruba] I don't care

if it's didi or shuku,

[sucks teeth] or didindin.

[in English] Do you even watch

Next Superstars?

What's that?

What's my business with that? What's that?

Is it the name

of an animal, place or thing?

Look here, young man,

don't make me get angry at you.

Don't stress me.

Sit calmly and don't bother me.

Don't stress me.

Sit calmly. I'm thinking about money.

How I will get money.

How to sell this car is

the only thing in my head right now.

And you're stressing me already.

Such senseless statement.

[in English] "Do you know my mommy?"

What's special about your mother?

Do you know my own mommy?

[in Yoruba] Do you know

Muri's mother? [tuts]

[tuts] Leave me alone please.

[Dinma's mom in English] I'm so sorry.

I don't know how it happened,

- he was watching his favorite TV show...

- No, Mommy, it's fine. It's fine.

- Mommy, I don't blame you.

- [sobs]

I don't blame you.

Remember your blood pressure.

Please. Just... just be calm.

The detective was

just saying something about um...

Yes madam. I was just saying...

I was just saying that um, kidnappers

- are usually very close to the victims.

- Kidnap?

It's a crime of intimacy.

Yes. So um,

we're gonna speak to everybody.

Including the boy's father.

Um, you know.

How's your relationship with him?

Um... [clears throat] it's... it's rocky.

Okay. No problem. No sweat.

We'll bring him in for questioning.

- Officer.

- Sir.

Please, take madam now,

use that other office

with AC and put an officer

there to take her statement.

- All correct, sir.

- Okay?

And then come back.

You and I need to go on an assignment.

All correct, sir.

You are leaving?

Uh, no my queen. I'll never leave you.

We're just going to bring your

son's father here for questioning.

Do you know where we might find him?

Nice. Um, his name?

[suspenseful music plays]

It's Banji. [sighs]

Banji Adams.

Sure.

It's okay.

[Muri] What's your name?

Cole.

- What?

- Cole.

[in Pidgin] What name do

your mom and dad call you?

[In English] I said Cole.

Ko. Ah-ah!

[in Yoruba] Your mom and dad named you Ko.

Out of all the names they could've chosen.

They didn't name you

Muri, Biola, Abbey but Ko.

[cackles] Strange. Sorry, Ko.

[in English] You don't even know

how to speak English at all.

Did you even go to school?

[in Pidgin] Uh,

I went to school up to JSS 3.

I reached JSS 3

but didn't write the WAEC exam.

I went to school.

[in Yoruba] Don't think about it.

[laughing]

What's funny to you?

What's funny?

Oh, you think it's easy to attend school?

[pop music playing]

[in English] You guys are the best,

my new jam

just made its first entry in the top 100!

[whoop]

But guys,

let's take it to number one. Alright?

I need you to stream

my new jam, "Sho'wa". Let's go!

Remember to do

the TikTok dance challenge. Okay?

TiktTk dance challenge.

Okay? I love you guys!

I love you guys, man.

[melodious music plays]

Alright, bring it.

- It's live.

- Oh, still live.

Rose flower, I'll follow back. I love you.

Stream my jam!

[music continues playing]

- [sucks teeth]

- [officer] Hey!

[tuts] Am I not allowed to park here?

Hey! [sighs]

Banji Adams. Right?

Who's asking?

This is as regards what?

What?

I'm a musician,

Chatting with my fans

The police trying to harass me

Oh yeah

[harmonizes drily]

Mr. Singer, your son has been kidnapped.

[tense tone plays]

As we speak, Dinma is at the station

with her mother giving their statements.

And as um...

[chuckles drily]

as the father of the child,

we need you to come

with us and give your statement.

What is it? Do you have another song?

[officer chuckles]

There will be plenty

of time to sing there.

[tense music playing]

Raski!

[in Pidgin] Hello, Muri, where are you?

[man 1] Market is bad.

- [trader] Boss. Sir.

- Guy, don't break my glass!

Raski, I'm in the market, where are you?

[Raski] The car

you stole is a Toyota. Right?

Um... I said it's a jeep.

Um, Changan, Changan.

What are you saying? Changan?

Wait a minute, black color?

[Muri] Yes, you are right. Oh, no!

I will punch you people.

Don't break my windscreen.

That car is a target.

[siren wailing]

[Raski] A real hot target.

It's a lie.

The police are searching

for that car as we speak.

There will be trouble

for anyone they find it with.

Don't you read the news?

[Muri] Raski,

how am I supposed to sell this car?

How do we do it?

Let me just drop it here and go on my way.

Go to Owode. Go and meet Chukwudi.

I will call him for you.

- Uh, Chukwudi.

- [siren continues wailing]

Look, if you're caught with that car,

I will join them to burn you alive.

- What is wrong with you?

- Okay, okay, okay.

[tense music playing]

[tense music playing]

[suspenseful music playing]

[in English] Will you tell me how

you're planning to get back my son?

[indistinct dialogue]

Detective!

Hey, did you smoke something?

Look around you.

You don't get to talk to me

in that tone of voice, ever!

[tuts] Please take this nonsense away

and get his statements.

- Yes sir.

- Thank you.

Guy, come and write...

Excuse me, Madam.

Come and write statement.

[detective] It's not your fault.

- Tear a paper for this man to write.

- It's the internet that is making

very stupid people famous.

- And I am shocked. [tuts] Really shocked.

- Get the paper.

You and him? How?

You've been playing together so hard.

You even reproduced for him.

When you were in the house,

no one could touch the laces

of your shoes. But...

Ah-ah, come on!

That is why we were very happy

when you said it wasn't his.

Can you please

just go back to finding my son?

[blogger] You see all these things

about Didi right?

[messages chime]

- I'm not surprised.

- Pass me my walkie. Pass it.

However, a proper investigation

needs to be carried out,

-to prove that Cole

-[detective] All units, listen.

indeed belongs to Banji.

- All the stations around the area...

- Because everyone

- knows that all she does...

- [Dinma] Oh my God.

- is to use that boy for fame and money.

- [detective] ...where Cole was kidnapped...

- Didi...

- [detective] ...has been mobilized.

- tell us the truth.

- Everybody knows...

I need updates from you.

- And as a relationship expert that I am.

- All units, updates by the minute.

I will advised that

the children stay focused.

- Because...

- You have heard the boss, right?

Over, over! You've heard the boss. Right?

What the hell is wrong with you?

You! You are what is wrong with me.

[tense music playing]

Uh? You did this, right?

Please cut out all this pretense

and all this acting that you're doing.

- Did you do this?

- No.

It was when he entered the live

video when we were recording live.

- Sorry, when who entered what?

- So you knew?

[Dinma] Now my business

is everybody's business.

What kind of policing is this?

My Queen, it wasn't me.

- I... I... was...

- You were what?

Rather than hover around me

and make a mockery of the Police force,

of the... Do your job!

My son has been kidnapped, eh?

This is real life.

This is not a reality TV show.

[pensive music plays]

[detective sighs] Come with me.

Boss, this woman

shouldn't be shouting at you like this.

You're dead.

And you, Banji, [chuckle]

you're enjoying this, right?

It's making you happy.

- This is what you want.

- What's that supposed to mean?

Was I the one that lost our son?

He was kidnapped.

And where were you? Huh?

Let me ask, no where to be found. Hmm?

That is rich, so rich coming from somebody

who has never ever been

responsible in his life.

You shielded me from him!

Of course!

I had to shield and protect my son.

Protect him from people like you

that will use him to chase clout.

[Banji laughs wrly]

You've been planting

a camera up the boy's nostrils

since the day he was born!

Look at you, pot calling kettle black!

- You're a b*stard.

- You're a fool.

- You're a heavy b*stard.

- Dinma, if I don't find my son...

- What are you going to do?

- I will ki...

- Listen... Don't play with me.

- You're irresponsible.

- I will...

- [Dinma's mom] Shame on both of you!

This is not the place for this.

[wistful music playing]

[sighs] If you know you want

to continue like this,

then leave the Police station!

After all, Cole was

in my custody when it happened.

- I'm sorry, Mommy.

- [sighs heavily]

I'm sorry Mommy. Please.

I think you should go home now please.

Go where?

My grandchild is missing.

Mommy, he just might show up at home

-and somebody has to be there

-to receive him, please.

Please.

Margaret, please come and take Mommy home.

And please monitor

her blood pressure. Please.

[wistful music builds]

[reporter] It has been revealed that Cole,

popularly known now as Chocoboy,

son of former housemate

for the Next Superstar

and Social Media celebrity,

Didi has been kidnapped.

[suspenseful music plays]

[car engines reviving]

[Muri in Pidgin] What is the Police

doing here again for Christ sake?

I thought I avoided them on the express.

They are still here. What is happening?

[tense music playing]

Muri, hope you have

not passed the wrong road?

Hope you have not stolen

the wrong thing? Stay composed.

Ko,

look, don't come down from the car.

Do you understand? Don't come down.

If you come down,

those boys will carry you.

If they carry you I can't save you again.

Do you understand?

Just sit down. I'm coming.

I'm coming now. You hear me?

Good boy.

[indistinct clamoring]

- [distorted quarrelling]

- [loud heartbeat]

[distorted quarrelling]

- [woman] Can't you see?

- [man 1] Leave me alone.

[tense music playing]

Hey! Guys, guys!

This is the car we've been looking for!

Here!

[siren starts wailing]

Come on, move!

[tense music intensifies]

[sirens wailing]

[in English] We got a report

from a patrol man

that they saw

a car that looked exactly like yours.

So why didn't they stop it?

Now, that part is not clear.

Okay so what do we do now?

We'll just keep searching.

We won't give up.

[suspenseful music playing]

Just thought to tell you.

[door squeals then bangs]

[Cole] Why are you even doing this?

Doing what?

Stealing.

You know there are

better ways to make money.

I don't understand.

[in Yoruba] Do you think, um...

Do you think everyone has a good life?

Look, it's not everybody.

If I had a choice... if I had a choice,

I won't be doing this.

I won't be doing this.

There's no work on the streets.

Everything is messed up.

Do you understand? And I have a mother.

I have three sisters and a girlfriend.

[in English] Huh? You have a girlfriend!

[in Yoruba] Ah-ah, what is wrong with you?

Who do you think I am?

I have a girlfriend.

Shay baby. Muri's babe.

The great picker.

[in English] Does your girlfriend know

you steal to give her money?

[in Yoruba] Look here,

young man, get some sense.

Mind your business.

Are you listening? Mind your business.

Look here, hey!

Don't let me get angry at you.

[Banji's PA in English] Post this?

[whispering] You can post it now. Post it.

Boss, we're also trending

number one on Twitter.

- [whispering] Number one?

- [Banji's P.A] "Sho'wa" is trending

- number one. I'm on it.

- Retweet.

Post, like, comment. Tell them to stream.

Major blogs.

- Just for, like, for free?

- Your song is doing well.

[Dinma] Why are you here?

Excuse me?

You've given your statement.

You're free to go.

[chuckles] Dinma...

[clicks]

You did not want me to keep this pregnancy

because you didn't want it

to dim your "star".

Don't you get tired of this thing, huh?

Okay, I did what I had to do.

You left.

You left when it mattered the most.

And then you waltz back in

when you saw

the roses were falling in on us.

Because somehow,

your life was a mess and you needed me.

What? [chuckling] Needed you?

You see, I don't care for all of that.

I don't.

What I cannot wrap my head around...

is how you would use a situation like this

to resurrect your

non-existent dead career.

Something that you should not even

be thinking about right

at this point in time.

It's not what you should be doing.

[tense music playing]

Using your PA.

Checking retweets!

Get out! Get out!

[bangs door]

[Dinma breathing heavily]

And you can leave too.

Mr. Man, you can leave.

Cole is my son.

I'm not going anywhere.

If you don't like it,

you can leave.

[Cole] So, what's the plan?

I don't understand.

[in Yoruba] What do you mean plan?

Who is planning with you?

[in English] Which plan?

As in, you stole a car and kidnapped me.

[in Yoruba] Look here!

What's that your name?

Look, don't implicate me.

You will not implicate yourself.

Who is kidnapped?

I didn't kidnap you.

I picked a car and you were in it.

I have business with the car not you.

Please, don't implicate me.

Was I not the one

who saved you from those th*gs?

Was I not the one who saved you?

When the Police stopped us,

why didn't you run?

Huh? When we stopped

at the Police checkpoint,

you could have run, but you stayed put

because you believe

it's your mother's car.

Don't say what you don't know.

Be sensible.

[in English] It's because

I don't want people

to be taking my pictures and autographs.

[in Yoruba] You're

not that popular, please.

- You're not popular.

- [in English] Oh really?

- Oh really?

- [tuts] Oh God, my iPad is dead.

I could have shown you some pictures,

- and videos.

- [in Yoruba] False. Forget that nonsense.

You're not... Do you know Pasu?

You don't know Pasu but Pasu knows Muri.

Pasu doesn't know you

so you're not popular.

Stop feeling like you're popular.

If you're popular,

you're rich. What is it?

They have deceived this one. [laughs]

[melancholic music plays]

[sighs]

[calm music playing]]

[in English] I don't

want to fight anymore.

[tuts]

Berate me all you want...

I deserve it.

I do.

But we shouldn't be fighting.

Not now.

[scoffs]

I'm just...

[sighs]

I'm just scared for my baby.

I don't know where he is.

I don't know what he's dealing with.

I don't know if he's hurt.

What if they k*ll him?

- No, no, no. Don't say that.

- [sobs]

- Shh. Don't say that.

- [groans]

- [groans]

- Only positive thoughts.

Okay?

- Cole is a smart boy.

- [whimpers]

He'll be fine.

[sobs] How do you know?

- How do you know?

- Shh. I just know.

I just know.

You raised him right.

-We'll find him,

-[sighs]

safe and sound.

Okay?

Okay.

Come here.

It's okay.

- It's okay.

- [sobs]

[Cole] I'm hungry.

You're hungry.

[in Pidgin] Alright look

in your Grandma's shopping bag.

You'll find soap and bleach.

[in Yoruba] Maybe you should eat soap

and wash it down with bleach,

to be full and be happy.

You're hungry. What do you want me to do

about your hunger? You're hungry.

Am I not hungry too? [tuts]

[in English] Please stop playing.

I'm really hungry.

Who's playing with this one?

[whines] I'm hungry!

I'm hungry! I'm hungry!

- [shouting] I'm hungry! I'm hungry!

- [in Yoruba] Alright.

I have heard. Don't shout at me.

Check inside the bag, your Grandma

must have bought you biscuits.

Are there no biscuits there?

Huh?

Look around the car, if you find any

loose change, I'll buy biscuits for you.

[in English] Grandma always

encourages a cashless lifestyle.

What did you say?

I'm not sure you're hungry.

You're not hungry.

Because if you're hungry,

you'll not be speaking big grammar.

- You'll speak what I can understand.

- [in English] She doesn't carry cash.

She doesn't carry cash.

[in Pidgin] Me too, I don't carry

cash because I don't have any money.

So, you're gonna be hungry.

- [in English] Check there.

- Check where?

- There.

- Ooh! What's all...

Alright, two thousand five hundred.

Or how much is this? 2500.

Alright, what do you wanna eat?

- [in English] Chicken and chips.

- Chicken and chi...

Cole has been... has been kidnapped,

and please we need your help to find him.

[suspenseful music playing]

- [Banji] So please If you have...

- [woman] You're enjoying your food.

- any information...

- English boy, hope you're enjoying it.

kindly contact the Police.

- Mm-hmm.

- [Banji] The information below

has the color of the car,

make of the car and the plate number.

[Dinma] We're also offering

a reward of ten million naira

-to anyone who has information

-[indistinct conversation]

- [indistinct]

- that will lead us to finding Cole.

[gibberish]

[mimicking Cole] Ye-yeah.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you very much.

Ten million naira?

Even the five million naira

is a struggle for me.

I just thought that

if we put a little boost, it would help...

Dinma... listen... We can't...

my life on social media is not...

- I don't have... I can't...

- Banji,

I know you don't have it

or any money for that matter.

I know.

So, do you have ten million naira?

For my son?

For Cole? Yes, I do.

[Muri in Yoruba] Hurry, hurry.

- [Cole groans]

- Don't waste time.

I don't have time for nonsense. Hurry.

Where's the toilet?

Which toilet?

Go and defecate there. Please.

[in English] Huh? I can't use that.

It's not hygienic.

It's not hygienic.

[in Pidgin] Go and defecate there.

Even your mom and dad have

defecated in the bush once.

Go and do your thing there.

- [Cole grunts]

- What is wrong with you?

Don't you know it's manure?

[Muri sucks his teeth]

[birds chirping]

- [Cole yelps]

- If you defecate here,

you know that it's fertilizer.

All these trees will grow.

Take, use it to clean your bum.

[in English] I can't use this.

Besides, I've never used it before.

There's toilet paper in the car.

Just go get that one.

[Muri sucks his teeth]

[in Yoruba] You're not truly pressed.

[Cole] Ow!

Hurry up so a snake

doesn't bite your buttock.

- Huh?

- Hey, do your thing.

No snake. I've told the snake to leave.

[Cole groans]

[in English] Please

bring the toilet paper!

Stop shouting, please.

[Cole] Ah! Jesus! [groaning]

[birds chirping]

[growling]

- Mm-m. What did you eat? Ah-ah!

- [groans]

- Take. Hmm.

- [Cole] Is it not the... [laughs, farts]

Mm-hm. Is that okay?

[Cole groaning] Ah! Oh!

Oh, thank you Lord.

- [sighs]

- [Muri sucks teeth]

[Muri huffs] Hurry.

Enter the car. Let's leave.

- [Cole] Ah!

- [birds chirping]

[Cole] Uh, God.

[Muri grunts]

[Muri] What's all this?

[Cole groans]

Oh God, I'm in trouble.

- Your defecation is taking too long.

- [Cole groaning]

God have mercy on me.

What kind of problem is this?

This boy should not die in my hands.

Ah Muri.

Muri, you've dulled yourself.

You should have left him on the street.

What's wrong with you? Are you okay? Ah.

Ko, sorry.

Alright, sorry.

Alright, come.

Sorry.

I'll take you to the chemist.

They'll give you medicine.

Alright, sorry. Ko, sorry.

Who is here?

Pharmacist!

- Who's here?

- [pharmacist] What do you want?

- What's wrong with your son?

- [Muri heaving]

He's got diarrhoea and vomiting.

Just give me tetracycline?

Oh no. I cannot

just give you tetracycline.

- What is wrong with him?

- He's got diarrhoea and vomiting.

Okay.

Let him sit down.

[Muri] Sorry, sorrry Ko.

- Sorry. Just sit back, okay?

- Sorry.

- Just sit back. Okay? Sorry.

- [groans]

Sorry. For how long? How many times?

[in Yoruba] Um, he started with

diarrhoea after we ate amala.

- Sorry.

- He ate and started with diarrhoea.

It's been up to six times.

And he has vomited like three times.

Okay. I will need to give him ORS

for him to regain the water he has lost.

Which one is ORS?

It would be expensive.

- It's not expensive.

- Just give him Tetracycline.

Sir, it's just hundred naira.

I'll give you for free.

It's okay. Uhn? Calm down.

- Ah, thank you.

- Okay? Just calm down.

- [Cole groans]

- Sorry.

[in English] Sorry, I'm coming now.

[Muri] Sorry.

- I'm coming. I'm coming.

- [in Pidgin] Rest your head. Sorry.

- Sorry. Hold this for me.

- Sorry.

- [pharmacist] Mm.

- [Muri] You're a strong man.

- [Muri] Sorry.

- You'll drink it now and feel good.

- Sorry.

- [pharmacist] Sorry.

Okay? Alright. Shake it.

- Should I shake it?

- Yes. Shake it.

Okay. Sorry.

Drink it little by little.

When you get home too,

you should drink it little by little.

- Careful. Don't choke him.

- [Muri] Sorry.

[pharmacist] Alright. Sorry.

- Sit back.

- My guy, sorry.

- You're a strong man.

- Uh, it could be food poisoning.

Ah-ah! Food poisoning? How?

I also ate the amala.

Uh... just because you gave birth to him

doesn't mean

your bodies are the same. Right?

Okay. It's not strictly so.

It's not strictly so.

Don't worry, he'll be okay.

Let him sip it little by little.

[Muri] You're a strong man.

God help me. My sister,

can I get water to wash his body?

- Um...

- Let me bathe him.

No problem. I'm coming.

- You won't be implicated.

- Let him keep sipping. I'm coming.

God will not disappoint you.

- [pharmacist] Amen.

- You're a strong man, Ko. Look at me.

- [Muri] Sorry.

- [pharmacist] Sorry.

- Okay.

- Here's the water. Sorry.

- Stand up. Sorry.

- [groaning]

- Sorry. Carry him.

- Let's go.

- Should I follow you?

- Yes. Thank you.

- Careful. Sorry.

- [Muri] Sorry.

- [pharmacist] Sorry.

- Very strong man. Sorry.

- [Benji huffs]

- [Dinma in English] Detective.

Yes Miss.

When last did you handle a case like this?

Hmm. A few months ago.

But I must tell you,

it didn't end well.

But for many reasons.

You need to have faith.

I don't know.

How do you believe in the same person,

who can stop all this from happening

but still let it happen? How?

Fair enough.

But it's the same thing as being hopeful.

And in my experience

I've found that many times,

hope is much more than enough.

Let's remain hopeful.

[girl 1 in Pidgin] Only God knows

where the innocent boy is like this, huh?

[girl 2] The real issue

is why she chose to sleep

with Bjay of all people!

[in English] What's wrong

with sleeping with Bjay?

So if you're given the

opportunity, won't you?

No.

Oh please.

- [pharmacist in English] Good evening.

- [both girls] Good evening.

What do you want to buy?

The usual. But for my friend.

One minute.

- Did you see it?

- Yeah, I saw it.

[news intro music]

That's Cole.

Such a sweet boy.

I know, right?

Is that Didi's son?

Jesus! The one that they're looking for!

- [in Pidgin] Wow, didn't you know?

- [pharmacist] Ah.

- Where have you been?

- I'm in trouble.

He was bathing outside here.

Hah! He was bathing here.

- The boy...

- What's going on?

The boy that they're

looking for just left.

He just left here not too long ago.

- Are you sure?

- Yes. I even gave him ORS to use.

See the ORS. I gave him ORS.

He was bathing outside.

- [in English] And you're sure?

- Yes.

- [exclaims]

- Just call the police!

Call Didi!

[clicks] [in Pidgin] There's

a ten million naira reward to find him.

- Exactly. Ten million.

- What did you say?

Ten million. [chuckles] Where's my phone?

[in English] What car

did he come here with?

Did he come here with a car?

Car... [tuts] I did not notice.

[groans] Oh God.

He just came in here

to buy medicine for him.

Medicine?

Cole can't just take any medicine.

What drug did you sell to them?

He was vomiting and stooling

- so I give him ORS.

- [scoffs]

It sounded like food poisoning

- from the way he was describing it.

- Jesus.

What did he give my boy to eat?

It's okay. Did you get his name?

Something?

I did not ask

but I told him to give him water

to clean his system.

Clean his system?

How was he when he left?

He'll be fine, okay?

Did he say anything

about where they were going?

I don't know.

He just... He rushed in here with the boy.

He even bathed him outside.

What?!

That's strange.

For a kidnapper.

- Even for a thief.

- Hm.

[in Pidgin] He vomited

all over his body so,

he asked me for water to bathe him.

I gave him water.

He went outside to bathe him.

[in English] Oh God,

what did he do to my boy?

God.

[in Pidgin] I even thought

he was the boy's father

with the way he was behaving.

What?! No! He's not his father.

I'm so sorry. Sorry.

[in English] Can I get a selfie?

Sorry ma. Sorry.

Hey, this CCTV, are they working?

- Yes sir. They are.

- All of them.

- Oh well, I'll need to see the footage.

- Yes. Over there sir.

- Right here?

- Yes sir.

Cool.

Um... [grunts]

- Let's see.

- Mm.

That's Cole! That's my boy!

- Is that him?

- Yes. That is Cole.

He must be the kidnapper.

He must...

So, it's you.

[Banji] You know him?

[chuckles drily]

I know him.

I always knew he was up to no good.

[crickets chirping]

[pensive music playing]

[sighs]

[in Yoruba] God in heaven.

What kind of trouble have I

found myself in for Christ's sake?

- [coughs]

- Sorry. Sorry, Ko. Sorry.

Sorry.

I'm in trouble.

What kind of trouble have I found myself?

Can't I steal a car in peace?

[tuts]

What kind of problem have I found myself?

If this boy dies in my hands,

I will go to prison. Straight.

Straight to prison.

Uh...

Uh no. This one is not good.

[smacks] Uh,

it will not be well with you, Raski.

Because I was easily

snatching purses and wallets,

he said I should go and steal a car.

Now I'm responsible for someone's child.

What if he dies under my watch?

Sorry, Ko.

Sorry, okay? Sorry.

[tuts]

Or I should leave him here and go.

I'll go to Police station

and report that I found a child in a car.

They will arrest me.

Or should I leave him

in the car and disappear?

- Hey.

- Hmm?

My stomach hurts.

Rub your stomach.

You're a strong man.

Sorry.

Lord, if you get me out

of this problem I put myself into,

honestly, I'll become a pastor.

I will worship you. I'll preach.

I will become a pastor,

or I'll be a loader. Or a conductor.

Sorry, Ko. Oh boy.

I don't understand. Even you, Ko.

[tuts] Food that we

normally eat on the street

to be strong and survive,

you ate it and started throwing up,

stooling and farting. Sorry.

Ah, street!

Ah! Street! [sucks teeth]

God please.

I will count my loss. Please.

Let this boy not die on my hands.

Let him not die.

Sorry, Ko. Strong man.

- Sorry. It's daybreak already. Sorry.

- [Cole coughs]

[crickets chirping]

[lively music playing]

[man] Chukwu, it seems you have a call.

Really?

Yes.

Who is the person?

I can't see a face.

You didn't see a face

and yet you brought the phone to me.

Give it to me.

Thank you.

This useless boy has come again.

Muri!

Muri, where's my money?

[Muri] Did Raski not tell you?

I'm driving the car to you.

Chukwuchukwu.

As the car is now a target...

- Okay?

- don't pass through the express.

Okay. I won't pass the express.

So, you don't get an injury.

- Okay. Alright.

- Don't take the express.

I'm coming. Just a hundred

meters away. I'm coming.

Alright then, you've not... Touch my neck.

You're too much.

Even in the Bible, that's how it is.

[lively music continues]

[crowd shouting] Cole. This is Cole.

- [officer 1] Quiet!

- [women shouting]

[distorted arguing]

- See the Cole.

- Sir, this is Cole.

[man yells] Quiet!

This is Cole.

What's wrong?

- Officer, this is the real Cole.

- He looks like him. This is Cole.

Oh I see. So, everybody is Cole.

- Look here, me too I'm Cole.

- [woman 1] He's Cole.

- Don't make me hit your heads.

- [woman 2] This is the real Cole.

Officer, let me see

that picture of the real Cole.

- "I'm Cole". I'm also Cole.

- [woman 3] See his face.

- So this is the real Cole.

- Yes sir.

- Look at his face, sir.

- Okay. Hold this for me.

[woman 2] This is the real Cole sir.

Hey, shh!

[in Pidgin] Ah-ah, this is not Cole.

This is Kola.

- [woman 4] No.

- What's your name?

- Kola... Cole.

- [officer 1] You see it?

- [officer 1] Okay...

- [boy 1] It's a lie! I'm Cole.

- [officer 1] If you er...

- [boy 2] I am Cole.

- Really?

- [woman 3] Officer, see the real Cole.

- What? Please, please.

- [woman 4] Officer, see the real Cole.

- [woman 2] Cole, see him.

- You can't be Cole. Jesus!

[upbeat music playing]

[upbeat music continues playing]

[in Yoruba] Ah-ah! This is Muri.

[in English] Where can we find him?

- [in Yoruba] You're looking for Muri?

- Yes.

[laughs] Has Muri caused another trouble

like he always does?

What did he steal this time?

He stole a child.

Whose child?

- He kidnapped these people's child.

- Come again, Mr. Police.

I said he kidnapped

this wonderful people...

Come off it, please!

What nonsense are you saying?

Muri does everything.

We know he's a petty thief.

But Muri cannot kidnap a child.

- Say something else.

- [in English] Thank you for your witness.

- But where is he?!

- Where is he?

- Bring him out!

- [in Pidgin] Don't shout on my head.

Or do I look like Muri?

[huffs] Madam?

Ah-ah!

Wait a minute, detective.

Ah-ah! Isn't this that girl?

- [detective] What's that?

- I said it!

Semiat, your head is in the right place.

I said it. Is it not this girl?

The one we watch on TV?

I knew it. Mr. Detective,

are you and this girl not together?

- What do you mean?

- Should I say it?

[in English] What nonsense

are you talking about?

[in Yoruba] I will expose you.

There's no secrets with me.

[in Pidgin] Did you not say

you wanted to marry this girl?

Um...

Hold it...

- Hold it... See...

- You see?

- Look, she's joking. Shut up! Where's he?

- [scoffs]

- Wait! Stop shouting.

- Do I look like a joke

- to you?

- Are you joking with us?

Ah!

Okay. Do you know Malaika street?

- Yes?

- Do you know Shalewa?

Don't you know Shalewa?

- Um...

- The hairdresser that makes hair.

[in English] Okay. Thank you very much

for your help. Let's go, everyone.

[in Yoruba] Quickly.

- I'm hungry but you ate all the food.

- [Cole belches]

Enter the car quickly.

[tears paper]

Ah!

Where did you find bread and sardine?

Ko, where did you see bread

and sardine. Speak up now!

[in English] From the place

we bought bread and tea.

- Ko, you stole.

- No, no, no. It's not like that. No!

[in Yoruba] I'm in trouble.

Ko, you have become a thief.

You've started stealing.

How would... Ah-ah!

Ko, why did you steal bread

and sardine from the seller?

[in English] For you. You didn't eat

and I knew you were hungry.

[in Pidgin] Hey! Is that why you stole?

Is that why you stole bread and sardine?

[in English] So, now it's bad

when I steal but it's good when you steal.

[tuts] [in Yoruba] Ko, if I punch you...

Ah-ah?!

Oh, do you think I want to wake up

every morning and go about stealing?

No, you think a fresh Muri

like me desires to continue stealing?

Look here, Ko, everybody has a choice.

You have a choice. I have a choice.

I have made my own choice.

I steal to survive. You have a choice.

Why would you steal bread and sardine?

Do you want to go to prison?

You have a very bright future.

You future is bright.

You can't be...

[in Yoruba] Look, don't make me

say the wrong thing. Go and return it!

[in English] I should... I should...

I will... I will give you a blow.

Let's go back. Why would

you steal bread and sardine?

Come on!

Um, please come. Go. C'mon.

Um... [clicks tongue] Aboki.

[in Hausa] How are you?

Please come. Tell him. Speak!

Speak, please.

Don't be offended.

My son carried bread and sardine...

He stole bread and sardine.

- Wow!

- I asked him to return it.

[crying] [in English] Is it not

because you don't have anything to eat?

And I know you don't have the money.

That's why I took it.

[incoherent murmur]

Your father is a good man.

[in Pidgin] If all the parents

in the world train their children

like this,

the world would be a better place.

Little boy, come.

Don't steal again. Do you hear me?

What do you say? Uh?

-I'm sorry

-[Muri] Speak up! [mimics]

- No problem.

- [tuts] Thank you. Don't be offended.

Wait, let me fry you small egg and bread

because sardine is expensive.

Well done, my friend. Alright.

Ko, why are you crying?

Look at me.

- Take.

- Ko. Ko, hey!

Well done, my friend.

Don't put too much salt.

Look here, why are you crying?

[tuts] See, Ko, look at me.

[Shalewa in Yoruba] Please.

I don't want to look at your eyes.

Please! Please, start going.

[in English] Okay. I'm sorry

but do you have his number?

Ah-ah! I have his mother's

and father's numbers.

His sister's number and house number.

I have the numbers

of everyone in their house.

[in English] Please, can you help

us call him? We need to call him

so we can track him down.

[in Pidgin] Wait a minute, I hope

it's not that he stole something from you?

[in English] It's a bit worse than that.

He kidnapped their son.

[chuckles]

What's so funny?

[in Yoruba] I'm finished, oh sorry,

Muri is finished.

[laughing]

Sorry. I don't know. Madam, please.

- It's very serious.

- Stop it, please.

- Look at the mother.

- I thought you said you're an officer,

when did you start doing comedy?

Muri kidnapped a child... Sorry Madam,

did he kidnap your son

or steal your son's toy?

- He kidnapped my son.

- [laughing] Muri!

It's not as though

he's a serious criminal.

Muri is not like that.

For example, you spread

38 heads of corn, he steals three.

Or if you sell biscuits, he steals some.

Or you're selling sachet water.

The other day, he stole zobo

drink from one Michael's mom.

Is that the person you

you said kidnapped your son?

He is a fool but he still reasons.

- He can't kidnap a child.

- [in English] Please.

It's my son.

It's my son we're talking about.

That is the mother. That is the father.

Help us call him, please. Call him.

- Please. Help us to call him.

- [in Pidgin] You're not joking?

- Please.

- [huffs] If I call him now, what do I say?

What will I say is

the reason for the call?

We're just trying to know where he is.

So should I still call him?

[in English] But you

will come to the station.

Help us call him so we can track him.

Why... why... why do I have

to be at the station?

Because, did I steal?

- You're not under arrest.

- Did I k*ll? Did I commit m*rder?

We came to ask for your help.

- I... see... I don't... I...

- The reward is ten million naira.

Why have you been

standing behind all this while?

You're supposed to be in front.

Why have you been standing

at the back? Ten million.

You want to call him?

Actually, Me... I... I don't have credit.

- But I will borrow it.

- [in English] No, don't worry.

We'll provide credit for you.

- [in Yoruba] Sis, I will be back.

- [Ramota] Alright. Don't be long.

- Sorry. Alright. Good luck.

- I'm working with the police.

No, no, no.

[suspenseful music playing]

Ah-ah!

Ko, you're still crying.

Alright, sorry Ko.

Sorry that I made you cry.

- Are you listening?

- [sobbing]

Ko. Ko, you know

I would not support you stealing.

It's not good.

What is not good is not good.

Do you understand?

It's not good. Alright, sorry.

Or have you ever stolen meat

from your mommy's pot?

Have you stolen meat

from your mommy's pot?

Huh? Choko Ko!

Alright, sorry. Alright, do like this, Ko.

One love.

Peace out. Well done.

Choko Ko.

Let's reverse. This car is good.

Alright. Away, away.

[Muri] Hello, Shay baby.

[in Yoruba] Why are you calling me?

You heard I'm about to blow, yeah?

- That's why you wanna start being clingy.

- Somebody come to my rescue!

Can you see that you're not okay?

This guy is joking. Me, clingy?

I don't understand.

Am I a bedbug? Or what?

You're an unfortunate person.

Can you see the rubbish

I'm experiencing because of you?

Huh? Humor me, latest criminal in town.

- They said you stole a car.

- Is that why you called me?

Is that why you're calling me?

- Get off my phone.

- Nothing good will come your way.

And even if it does, you will not prosper.

And if you do prosper,

you will not have peace.

You will not have joy in your life.

You will never relax in peace.

Everybody in your house,

that congratulated your parents

when they gave birth to you will suffer.

You will suffer.

Are you mad?

I'm running around

for things I know nothing about.

Are you mad?

Remember we've broken up.

Get off my phone. Fool.

- Me, fool? Ah! I have suffered!

- [bangs table]

Get off the phone, fool!

- Why all the insults? Huh?

- [phone disconnects]

You asked me to make this nonsense call.

Please what's all this rubbish?

Please.

But you didn't tell him what we agreed.

Yes, what did we agree?

What did we agree on?

Someone that has pending curses from me.

And I've had the opportunity to say

some of it and they will come to pass.

Call him back.

Do you have a g*n?

Captain America. Put a g*n to my head.

- [in English] Call him back.

- What is wrong with you?!

[in Yoruba] Move back! What is...

Please, don't shout at me.

You're a star in your area

and I am a star in my area too.

If you come to my area.

Number one, One and only Shaly baby.

You and who? What's that?

If it's not negligence,

what is a child doing alone in a car?

What's all that carelessness?

I'll call him back once.

Once again.

[dial tone]

[line disconnects]

What did I tell you?

I said he's an unfortunate person.

- He didn't pick up.

- [in English] Oh, what is all this?!

[detective] Where are you?

- [in Pidgin] Excuse me, Mr. Police.

- Hmm.

This area that you circled,

which area is that?

[in English] These are

the possible places he can be.

- Really?

- [detective] Um, Ado, Atan, Owode...

- Owode.

- [detective] Hmm.

What? Do you something we don't?

[in Pidgin] No.

I don't know anything about Owode.

Please, don't implicate me.

[in English] Look,

if you continue to refuse to help us,

do you know I can get you

arrested for obstruction of justice?

- Ah-ah!

- [guard] You'll sleep in a cell.

[in Yoruba] It will not be well with you.

If you ever talk while I'm talking,

those words would be your last.

It means you have been called to glory.

Please I will call a lawyer now.

[in English] Please this is about my son.

Please.

If not because

of this woman, I won't intervene.

Look, nobody knows tomorrow.

That's why I want to help you.

[birds chirping]

[phone ringing]

[grunts]

[in Yoruba] They're calling you.

What do you mean,

"They are calling me?" What happened?

- Who is calling?

- Collect this from me.

Ah-ah! Don't let it fall into the well.

What do you mean, "They are calling me?"

Who is "they" calling me?

Is that why you're frowning?

It's Muri's wife that is calling.

It's Shalewa calling.

- Put it on speaker.

- Ah-ah!

Okay.

Hello Shalewa.

[Shalewa] Raski, Raski. Quick one...

- Chukwudi's place is at Owode, right?

- What is really happening?

Raski, talk to me. Please.

Shalewa, what is really happening?

I don't want trouble.

- What happened?

- Where exactly does Chukwudi stay?

- That's what I'm asking. Answer me.

- Shalewa, let me tell you something,

Muri loves you. He loves you a lot.

Ah-ah! Don't get into trouble.

- Don't get into trouble. What happened?

- [drily] Okay.

So, I don't love him, right?

I don't love him yet I've been up

and about because of him.

Tell me the place, please.

Okay.

Do you have a pen and paper with you?

[Cole in English] Why

are you driving so slow?

[in Pidgin] Ah Ko,

this car must not scratch.

If it scratches, it will ruin things.

My money will be reduced.

And my money cannot be reduced.

[in English] What do you want

to use that money to do anyways?

[chuckles] You're just being childish.

First of all, I'll give Chuwkudi

his money because I owe him some.

Do you understand me?

I'll give him his money first.

I'll then use what's left

to buy a korope bus.

[in English] Wait, what did you say?

Did you say ko...?

Korope. Say ko,

Ko

-Ro

-Ro

Pe

Pi.

Korope.

- Koropi.

- You're not intelligent.

You cannot know anything.

Anyway, I will buy

two korope buses for my friend and I.

That's like ten thousand each day.

So, if I collect ten thousand each day...

Look where you're going,

don't scratch my car.

If I collect like ten thousand each day,

I'll remove two thousand to buy fuel.

The remaining five thousand,

I'll give my mother,

my sisters and Shay baby.

That's my girlfriend.

You can't have girlfriend.

You're too young to have a girlfriend.

Don't have a girlfriend.

[in English] You think

I don't know that already?

[in Pidgin] We have arrived at the place.

[tense music plays]

We have arrived.

- [Cole sighs]

- Easy. Relax.

[hoots]

When you sell this car,

what will happen to me?

Will you just dump me on the road

or you'll take me back to my mom?

[soft gasp]

[tense music builds]

[Muri] I have brought it.

The container has landed.

Freshly baked, you can cut like a cake.

- I have arrived.

- [phone ringing]

Come on. Why are you calling me?

- Muri!

- I can hear you.

You don't pick calls here.

I don't plan to answer the call.

I'm here to collect my money. [chuckles]

Chukwudi!

With the way it is...

- Yeah?

- drop my money.

Uh, Chukwudi, on these streets?

You know your money

is in the sale of this car.

As it is, your money is in it.

This car you're seeing is estimated at,

give or take, five million.

But because of our relationship,

give me two million.

- And then we move from there.

- [Cole] What did you say?

Ignore him.

[in English] Did you call

this car two million?

This thing, did you call it two million?

This is a Changan CS55

and you're calling this two million.

This is 360 degree camera parking assist

which means this car can park on its

own and you call this baby two million?

[Muri exclaims]

[in Pidgin] Chukwu,

you have heard the update,

- the price has changed to three million.

- Hey! Keep quiet.

You've been yapping

like a parrot since you came in here.

- Guy, I'm selling a product.

- You sing like a canary. Are you bird?

- Relax.

- Chukwu, you see this small boy,

- his face is all over the internet.

- [Cole] What's your problem?

Why would you price this car...

- Hey, stop! you see..

- They say he's been kidnapped.

- There's ten million on his head.

- I'm gonna carry you, throw you in the...

- Look at it.

- [Muri] I'm gonna carry you into the

car and throw the key away. Relax.

- [thug] Ten million.

- [Muri] Did you hear what I'm saying?

Hey, Ko,

it's not everything you see you say.

- Do you hear me? Listen...

- [thug] [in Igbo] We'll do it as usual...

- So that...

- A stitch in time, saves nine.

saves nine.

[in Pidgin] We'll re-strategize.

That's what we should do.

- Muri!

- My Boss, Chukwudi. Give me money!

[singing] Give me the money

- Muri.

- Yeah?

As I speak to you, this boy is bad news.

- The Police is searching for him.

- I'm in trouble.

- [singing] It's been exposed

- It's been exposed

- Muri don't go and it's been exposed

- It's been exposed

The boy is not a problem.

Okay, face the other side.

The boy is not our business here.

Let's just talk

- about this car so I can go.

- Your face is on the internet.

Your face is also exposed.

- Me, Muri?

- Chukwu, explain to him.

- [Chukwudi and thug] It's bad news.

- It's bad news.

The Police are searching for this boy.

So it's better like this...

[suspenseful music plays]

The Police should come...

and arrest you.

I'll give you

the three million you're asking for.

- [thug] Confirmed.

- But you'd be headed straight to prison.

That's the truth.

Three to five years imprisonment for you.

While I keep your three million for you.

When you're released, guy,

you'll collect your three million.

Enough for you to start life afresh.

You won't go there

to suffer, nor to serve.

You're just going to enjoy

because our boys are there.

Even Larry will protect you.

You will come out to collect your money.

Hold on...

Muri can't go to prison. Guy wait.

Wait a minute, let's do it this way,

[clicks tongue] boss,

carry the car but give me five thousand

so Ko and I can go

with a public transport.

Go and get your bag let's go.

If you take a step, I'll sh**t you.

- You will get more from the others.

- [th*gs] Thoroughly!

- I will sh**t and the other will respond.

- Thoroughly!

Do you think we're joking here?

- Relax. Guy it's not... God, I'm in trouble.

- Chukwu,

let's do this thing quickly.

- There's money on the boy's head.

- [Muri] What will I do now?

[thug] There's no time.

Let me g*n this man down.

Let's take the boy

and get the ten million.

- Because a stitch in time saves nine.

- ...saves nine.

- When we do it quickly...

- Everything falls in place.

And then we see what happens.

- And then we see what happens.

- Yes, then we see what happens.

- Chukwuchukwu!

- And then we see what happens.

- [in English] Uncle Muri.

- Wait! Chukwuchukwu.

- Uncle Muri, I need to go ease myself.

- Oh God!

Please. Uncle Muri please.

Can I go ease myself please?

Please I need to go ease myself. Please.

[in Pidgin] Boss, do you have

a toilet here? Where's your toilet please?

What's this guy's problem?

So, after everything we have said,

toilet... To defeacate is your priority.

- It's for the boy.

- Hey, stand aside!

- Go, go now.

- Go that way!

- Follow me, please.

- To avoid trouble...

- Oh no, Ko!

- Please!

- Please.

- Give me five thousand so I can leave.

[Muri] This thing is taking too long.

Go, go! Go, Ko.

Leave the door!

You're frustrating me.

Go to the toilet.

- Go and ease yourself.

- [in English] Wait.

I don't actually want

to ease myself. Okay?

I just said that

to talk to you without them here.

[clicks tongue] Ko, I will punch you.

Talk to me, what... [clicks]

- Wait, wait. Wait!

- [groans]

Please. My grandma speaks Igbo to me.

- And so?

- So I understand what they were saying.

Nice one. How much do they want to pay?

They want to k*ll you and kidnap me.

- Huh?

- They want to k*ll you and kidnap me.

They'll take me away.

[tense music playing]

Ah-ah!

Chukwchukwu wants to k*ll me.

Yes.

And they're going to take me away.

[hailing himself] Muri! Chukwu...

Chukwu, this thing has taken too long.

[Cole and Muri panting]

- Okay, okay... go, go.

- [Cole panting]

- [in English] Ko, when I run, you run.

- [Cole] I run.

[in Pidgin] Go and check on that guy.

See what they're doing.

No problem.

[thug] Do it quickly.

Do it quickly.

[suspenseful music playing]

[thug] What did you say?

- The guy and the boy have moved.

- Ijoba!

I saw it in a vision.

I even dreamt about it.

Chukwu, that guy has swindled you.

[tense music playing]

- [Chukwudi] Hey!

- [th*gs] Problem!

- Hey!

- Problem!

Listen up, there's an alien in town.

He's with a little boy.

And we can't sit

and watch with pepper in our eyes.

- Right?

- [all] Right!

- [Chukwudi] Hey!

- Problem!

As I speak to you now, go and find him!

k*ll him!

[all cheer]

[tense music continues]

[indistinct market chattering]

[sirens wailing]

[tense music beats]

Choco boy!

Choco boy.

[Muri] Shhh.

Mom Choco... Mommy see choco boy.

[woman] Eh! Choco boy, what happened?

- [in English] There are some...

- Men.

Men that want to kidnap Choco boy.

- [woman] Uh, kidnappers?

- Yes.

You know what you'll do now?

Go to the back of this house,

turn back this way, you will see the bush.

- Okay.

- Then enter the bush.

From bush, you will go to the express.

- I'm in trouble.

- Wait. [gasps]

[indistinct]

[suspenseful music playing]

[tense beats]

[yelling] If you move, you die!

[Cole] Hey!

- [yells] Uncle Muri!

- [Muri] Hey!

Uncle Muri!

[thug shouts]

Muri, you can't tell me

you don't know how things are done.

You can't tell me that! Leave me!

[apprehensive music plays]

[indistinct far off chatter]

[sirens wailing]

No!

[sirens wailing]

And who is that?

[steel fencing clattering]

Who are they?! Hey!

- [officer 1 in English] Drop your weapon!

- [officer 2] Drop that g*n down!

[officer 3] Drop your weapon!

- Drop your weapon, drop your weapon!

- Drop it now!

I said drop your weapon!

[Dinma] Where's Cole?

- Eh!

- Where's Cole?

- g*ns!

- Where's my son?

- [Shalewa] g*ns!

- Stay back!

- I don't care! Where's Cole?

- Where's the boy?

[in Pidgin] Did you see anyone here?

Did you find anybody here?

We see the car. But we don't see the boy.

- [Chukwudi groaning] There's nobody here!

- Where's Cole? [gasps]

[Shalewa] Hey! Madam! Madam has fainted!

- [in English] Dinma! Help me!

- [in Pidgin] Problem! Where's Muri?

[pensive music plays]

[calm music]

You can go.

It's okay.

- Do you want to hit me?

- Boss man.

How are you? How's work today?

Where are your particulars?

What are you carrying?

Don't worry. Let me check for myself.

[dramatic music playing]

[in English] Sir.

[detective] Yes?

Reports coming to me

from the radio is that we have good news.

We have seen the boy.

Boy. What about Muri?

We caught him as well, sir.

- In the station?

- Yes sir.

Nice job. Your boy is here.

- Huh?

- Let's go get your boy.

- We'll see the boy. We've found the boy.

- You found him?

- Detective!

- We found your boy.

- Where is he? Where?

- [laughing]

- Oh yeah! Yeah, yes.

- Detective, are you sure?

We have seen Cole!

Well done. Nice work.

[door knob twisting]

Oh! Cole!

- Cole!

- Mommy!

You're an unfortunate human being.

- Ah!

- [Dinma] My baby.

Muri, you kidnapped a whole child.

- Police, do your worst.

- What are you doing?

- You're sick in the head. [mumbles]

- Leave me.

- [Dinma] You!

- [Muri screams]

[Muri] They're beating me. Elbow!

- She hit me with an elbow!

- Hey! Why are you fighting here?

- What's going on here?

- [Muri groaning]

- [officer 2] Let it be.

- [Muri] They're hitting me with elbows.

[officer] Hey, hey, hey!

- Remove your hand!

- You are fighting in the station.

What's happening here? What's happening?

[in English] He kidnapped my son!

[Cole] No, Mom!

Uncle Muri didn't kidnap me.

- Are you sure?

- Yes.

He saved me and protected me.

Welcome, sir.

[Dinma sighs]

[Muri groans]

So, let me get this straight.

[in Pidgin] The other day,

you were at Semiat's canteen,

where you ate and refused to pay.

- [officer] Is he lying?

- [detective] Hmm?

You steal food.

Now you graduated.

You now steal children.

- You kidnapped a child.

- Mr. Police, I did not kidnap the child.

- I didn't kidnap the boy.

- Did I give him to you?

Sir, truthfully I...

Ko, did I... I didn't kidnap him.

- Stop lying!

- Poke him.

Wait!

You have to trust him.

- For real?

- [Cole pants]

Mom, you see,

he carried me off from the road

and since then

he has been taking care of me.

- Stockholm syndrome.

- In fact, this morning,

when I was so hungry, he bought me bread

and tea even though

he didn't have any money.

We even had to beg

a truck to bring us here.

- And when some bad guys wanted to...

- Bad guys?

Yes. Wanted to take me away,

he stood up for me,

even though they offered him money.

I didn't take it.

He didn't, even though he needed

it to pay his girlfriend.

- [in Yoruba] Uh, my husband, stand up.

- [grumbles]

[in English I owe you

an apology. I'm so sorry.

[mid tempo music playing]

[Muri heaves and sucks his teeth]

Thank you.

[in Yoruba] Sorry, my husband.

Hmm? Sorry, okay?

Sorry. You have suffered a lot.

[in English] Madam Didi, you know

we have an eye witness statement

that they saw this man

at the pharmacy with this boy.

[in Yoruba] Please don't bring that up.

What eye witness is that?

You have started. The Police has started.

[detective] We also have

CCTV footage of him...

[in Pidgin] The child said

he wasn't kidnapped.

And I've said

the same thing from the beginning.

You see Muri, he can do everything,

like stealing 50 naira or 1000

but not to kidnap a whole child.

When it's not like I don't know him.

My love. My heart.

My joy. The one after my heart.

My happiness. My life.

And you're here saying

he kidnapped someone.

He didn't kidnap anybody.

[in English] Please,

this is not the time to talk anyhow.

I'm gonna ask you,

for your own sake, be quiet now.

[in Pidgin] Nobody can scare you.

Hey, Code, did he kidnap you?

[in English] No, it's Cole. Not Code.

- But no, he didn't.

- Oh.

[in Yoruba] Did you hear that?

He said he wasn't kidnapped.

What other evidence do you want?

Where did you see the worthless witness?

[in English] I'm not going

to say it one more time,

shut up.

Tell me the truth, did he kidnap you?

No, Mom. He didn't.

He's innocent.

Detective, my son doesn't lie.

I believe him.

[detective] He's a great guy.

He's a good boy.

He's trying to help him.

You know, at least, he stole the car.

How do we know?

We found the car with the th*gs.

They say he brought it there.

Detective. Please.

Thank you very much for finding our son.

It's been a long 24 hours.

[splutters] We just want to take him home.

Look at him. Our boy is tired! Please.

Please.

Okay. You can go.

[in Pidgin] Remove the cuffs.

[officer] Hey, give me that key.

[Shalewa scoffs]

Evil doers.

[Banji sighs]

[in English] I'm sorry

for all the things I said.

It's okay.

You shouldn't be the one saying sorry.

You're the glue that binds us together.

I should be the one saying sorry.

And um, thank you

for being a great mom to him.

[officers mumble]

[Dinma titters]

Let's go.

Excuse me, Mommy Ko. Daddy Ko.

Sorry.

[in Yoruba] They said there's

a ten million naira reward.

I'm not asking for ten million.

- Can I at least get five million?

- Uh! [tuts]

Calm down. Even if we get

one million, isn't that fine?

Shut up and let's go.

- Shameless person.

- [in English] You don't want 20 million?

[in Pidgin] Sir, alright. Transport fare.

Let's just collect transport fare

and we'll be on our way.

[tense music playing]

Here's your key.

[clears throat]

[in English] How come you have the key?

We have caught him.

How did you get the key?

Do you want to hear it from the stick?

[in Pidgin] Um,

it's Ko that gave it to me.

[in English] Oh, wow!

What about how you told us

that you ran away from

the kidnappers who he said had the key.

- Detective.

- What?

Why are you asking all these questions?

We're not pressing any charges.

I know. But stealing is

a crime against the state.

I appreciate you being kind

but you know a crime

has been committed here.

And we've spent the last few hours just...

In too much because of you.

I'll give you two options.

One of two options.

In the spirit of what's going on here...

One, let me investigate

this guy thoroughly

about how he came about that car key.

Which I know for sure

he would not survive it.

Or he can just spend a night in jail.

A night in jail.

Wait. Wait.

Uncle Muri, I just wanted to say

thank you for all you've done for me.

I really had fun with you.

Strong man.

Cole, just because the person is nice

doesn't mean

they haven't committed crimes.

Remember that.

Armed robbers are nice too.

- [officer] Go inside!

- [in Yoruba] My husband, don't worry.

A lot of big people

in the society also went to prison.

Prison is not a big deal.

- Go inside.

- One day, one week or one year,

I will still be here for you.

And I know you want

to implicate him

but I will not take it easy with you.

It won't happen.

[in English] With a girlfriend like you,

now I know why he's a criminal.

[thrilling music plays]

[female voice]

Welcome to the relaunch of Choco milk.

With our brand ambassador, Choco boy

and his sidekick, Choco Bobo.

[crowd cheering]

[lively music]

[crowd singing along]

[music playing]

[outro song]