01x12 - Funny Gal

[bunniefuu]

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oh my queen said the royal sorcerer to

hatch upset

with this amulet you and your

descendants are endowed by the goddess

!sis with the powers of the animals and

the elements you will soar as the falcon

soars

run with the speed of gazelles

and command the elements of sky and

earth

three thousand years later

a young science teacher dug up this lost

treasure and found she was heir to

the secrets of !sis

and so unknown to even her closest

friends rick mason and cindy lee

she became a dual person andrea thomas

teacher

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and

!sis

dedicated foe of evil defender of the

wake

champion of truth and justice

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hey carrie

great you see a boy

what are you dressed up for this time i

am the ghost of the plus and the spirit

of the now

could be you do look a little spooky

hey listen uh speaking of ghosts i

thought you were gonna become one at the

destruction derby last saturday i never

figured you'd get out in one piece don't

be silly with all this blubber i carry

around they couldn't hurt me i don't

know why i bother with you you're

hopeless my lovely

what are you gonna do next oh something

worthy of my talents carrie you are a

nut but you're a million laughs i'll

catch you later later

nice to know somebody's happy

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now benjamin franklin had done this

experiment instead of playing with that

silly old kite

he sure would have looked funny

all right

[Applause]

follow me

just follow your little okay piper to

the land of hamburgers ice cream and all

that good stuff

that girl

runs do not walk

last bus to hamlin

leaving

what what

something's wrong carrie's in trouble

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[Applause]

by the iceland

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oh zebra winds would grow on high with

me now so i can fly

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let's see you laugh your way out of this

one fat kid

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[Applause]

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turn back to me

stop

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!sis wow thank you the throttle's back

and then the steering and the brakes

went out are you all right oh sure

what could happen to the queen of the

uglies that's a terrible thing to say

you should stop putting yourself down

that way

person's got to be realistic you're not

being realistic you're just being

foolish you can't expect other people to

like you unless you like yourself first

unless you know where i can get a body

transplant what's the life

your mind your sense of humor

you always keep the kids laughing maha

and as soon as it stops the guys go off

with the chicks you know the ones that

look great in bikinis nobody cares if

they got a mind carrie you are an

intelligent girl believe me i'd rather

not be so intelligent

i could just become prettier

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i brought some of my special homemade

fried chicken i had leftover from last

night and some potato salad and sounds

great i have a couple of deviled egg

sandwiches and a cucumber salad

what did you bring rick

what do you mean what did i bring

you guys invited me

invited you

well we just said why don't you have

lunch with us

well if that's not an invitation

what is

all right you can have some of my

chicken

i suppose you can have one of my deviled

egg sandwiches

you are two

wonderful human beings that's what you

are

you know something mr mason

i think you ought to get married

i'm going to

you are

when

as soon as i find someone who looks like

!sis

and cooks like you

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if that's your attitude towards women

you're going to end up a very old and

hungry bachelor

not to change the subject or anything

but

what are we going to do about carrie

anson

well why don't we just leave her alone

it looks like she's having a good time

with greg

she's a very unhappy girl rick

carrie thinks of herself as a big fat

zero

and i'm not trying to be funny that's

why she keeps putting herself down it's

her way of saying hey look at me i'm a

person well what do you want to do about

it

listen see if this makes any sense

the elections for student body president

are coming up right

right

what would happen if uh quote

spontaneous unquote campaign started to

get carrie elected

great idea cindy

that should convince her that people

really like her and respect her for

being just herself

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say greg's in one of my classes how

about if i slyly insert the idea into

his head about starting the campaign

fantastic

that kind of thinking is worth two

pieces of chicken any day and a deviled

egg sandwich

marvelous

that's a super idea mr mason i wish i

thought of it oh my blessing's on you my

boy you know maybe it's the wrong word

to use but i've always been impressed

with karen well carrie's a very

impressive gal she does hide her iq

though yeah but well sometimes i'm

almost a little afraid to talk to her

how come well you get too serious with

her and she starts to climb around it's

like she doesn't want you to get too

close to her you know i know what you

mean

you know and the way she talks about

herself

carrie anson the female moby d*ck miss

20th century ugly

boy you know it's gonna be tough to

change that image into a contender for

student body president do you think you

can do it greg

sure mr mason hey if you know what our

campaign slogan's going to be

vote for carrie anson for student body

president

anything for a laugh

okay i'll see you later yeah all right

well

what'd you expect dummy that anybody

would really think you were good enough

to be student body president

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look

nobody's gonna take my running for

office seriously including you

i'm kidding of course i take it

seriously

okay

then will you see my new idea

turn your head don't don't peak until

i've blown it up

you're gonna love this i'm sure

okay okay wait

all right now look turn around

vote for the candidate who looks like

this neat huh

carrie when are you going to stop doing

this doing what putting yourself down oh

come on greg is just a joke i don't

think comparing yourself to a balloon is

funny okay you don't like that

how's this for an idea

i challenge my opponents

to an eat-a-thon a what

an eat-a-thon

we line up 500 pizzas on the school

track and the first one to eat his way

to the finish line wins

terry you're impossible and if you don't

like that i've got an even better idea

rick

this is the third time you've invited us

to go boating and this is the third time

we haven't even left the dock

is this about glued to its slip you

don't understand half the fun of boating

is the preparation

fun for who

for whom

okay fun for whom

look all of this preparation is very

necessary and i promise both of you that

the next time we come out here i'll take

you out into rick there's not going to

be a next time your sl*ves have just

emancipated themselves

i know what both of you need a nice cold

drink it's gonna take more than a cold

drink to straighten out my sore back

cindy you and i are too fairly

intelligent young women how did we let

him con us into this three times in a

row just lucky i guess

there now you relax and enjoy that

and uh i don't want either one of you to

dare do one lick of work for at least 10

minutes

10 minutes he's been out in the sun too

long

how's uh kerry's campaign going

not too good i'm afraid she seems to

have this picture of herself as a w*r

shot she just can't get rid of it well

greg's working really hard i know that

for sure i hope he can help her

break through that barrier she's built

up aim into that

well time's up let's get back to work

hippity-hop

hey wait a minute where are you going

come back here

that's mutiny

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hey carrie hold it

hi manager how's the campaign going well

according to my latest unofficial poll

we're gonna lose and for only one reason

nobody's gonna vote for me carrie you

could have this election locked up if

you wanted to come on greg

i know you never really believed i stood

a chance you do huh how do you know that

i

well i

i just know that's all why do you think

i've been beating my brains out laughs

what else like me

well thanks a lot for wasting my time

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miss thomas

carrie

you got a minute sure come on in

what can i do for you well

do you think you could talk mr mason

into lending me his boat

i think it would be easier talking him

to lending you his right arm i know but

i got a great idea for a publicity stunt

gary

you know the star trekker is his pride

and joy and i'm afraid he already knows

all about those publicity stunts of

yours miss thomas it's awful important i

just gotta have that vote

will you ask him

okay we're playing tennis later and i'll

ask him but i can't promise anything so

don't count on it

thanks

thanks anyway okay

see you later yeah

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no tennis yes of course but dr barnes

caught me just as i was leaving i'll go

to the girls gym and change no that's

all right i just got here myself there's

a storm coming in and i wanted to make

sure the boat was secure speaking of

your boat do you know who i almost ran

into well actually it was vice versa who

carrie anson she was coming into the

marina just as i was leaving

rick carrie asked me if i would ask you

if you would lend her your boat you're

kidding when i said i didn't think you

would she seemed very upset but you're

absolutely right i wouldn't think

you don't

think better check on the boat right

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oh zebra winds which go on with me now

so i can fly

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mayday mayday this is carrie anson

aboard the star tracker two

may day may day

star tracker this is the coast guard

what is your position

i say again star

we read your mayday give us your

position that doesn't make every

newscast in town i don't deserve to be

student body president

not just one more

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thing mr mason i owe you a new

microphone

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this is like looking for a needle in a

haystack

there's a storm moving

i guess it's time to head back

oh

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cindy

you're really late where's andrea i

thought she was with you well wouldn't

you know what every time there's an

emergency she disappears what emergency

what are you talking about oh come on

i'll tell you on the way to the marina

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where can she be

if i don't find her soon

there she

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hi is thank goodness i can't get the

motor started and there's a leak in the

boat

i pulled a really dumb stunt this time

and i'm in a lot of trouble more than

you know carrie there's a storm coming

in and i can't help you here and stop

the storm i need a little help on this

one

cut hear me take to flight

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now to find captain marvel

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there he is

tut bring captain marvel i need him fly

due west

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hang in there carrie help's on the way

thank you !sis

now to see if i'm holding off that storm

oh except for winds which flow on high

lift me now so i can fly

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looks like little housework is needed

here

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that

what is it

does you need me

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which way is she

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west of here all right i'll take care of

it from here

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oh

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have to pull that storm back until

captain marvel arrives to help karen

almighty storm that rolls so free now

roll back

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storm seems to be letting up

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of course that's it !sis can't hold back

the storm and still bring the boat in at

the same time

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captain marvel ice is sent for me now

let's see about getting you out of here

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so

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[Applause]

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i don't know how to thank you captain

marvel i do just don't get into a

situation where i'll have to do this

again

and you !sis same goes for me just don't

do it again oh don't worry i've learned

my lesson

two lessons

if people like you and captain marvel

and greg could go through what you did

just for me

well

maybe i'm not as worthless as i thought

good girl carrie what's the second

lesson

no more crazy stunts like this ever

i think you'll have some explaining to

do to the coast guard a false distress

signal is a very serious matter

i know

it was a dumb thing to do well anyway

you're safe and the boat's safe and let

me tell you i'm glad about that because

i put a lot of work into that boat

you

you put into it

what about me and andrea speaking of

andrea she missed all the excitement

again

you know !sis i'm beginning to think

that andrea's afraid of you

i mean you are pretty rough competition

for a woman really

what would you think of captain marvel

as competition for a man

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uh cindy and terry uh why don't i give

you ride home

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[Applause]

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