01x01 - Bubble, Bubble, Oil and Trouble

[bunniefuu]

[opening theme music playing]

[narrator] Spider-Man

[inaudible speaking]

[meow]

[inaudible speaking]

[roar]

[narrator] Spider-Man.

[Spider-Man] Boy, this is the life.

No stoplights. No traffic jams.

No trouble.

- [glass breaks]
- Uh-oh.

Speaking of trouble.

That sounded like someone
breaking into the museum.

A definite no-no if I ever heard one.

Might as well
get some photos for the Bugle

while ol' Spidey does his thing.

[chuckles]

I've done it.

Only the mechanical arms of Dr. Octopus

could've stolen this million-dollar ruby.

[Spider-Man] And only the wiggly webbing
of Spider-Man

is gonna make you wish you never tried.

You!

Hey, that's a crummy way to say hello.

You can stop worrying, blue eyes.

Here's Spidey.

What do I have to do to get rid of you?

For starters, you can try eating onions.

That does it.

I'm quitting your fan club.

Now, that the web spinner
is out of the way,

I can continue with my master plan
to take over the world.

Sheesh.

If I only had sinus trouble.

I don't get it.

Why would Octopus stolen that ruby
and left all the other jewels behind?

Oh, no. I forgot my homework.

The professor will skin me for this.

[keys clank]

[sighs]

No use.

Doc Oc wore me out.

Can't even keep my eyes...

Poor Peter. I hope he didn't
stay up all night

doing his homework again.

Peter, time to get up dear.

Oh, no.

If Aunt May catches me
in my Spidey threads, I'm finished.

[yawns]

Hi, Aunt May.

I... I must have overslept.

Well, you mustn't
be late for school, dear.

Remember, the early bird catches the worm.

Uh, speaking of worms,

anything on the radio about Doc Oc?

Who, dear?

Oh, look at that.

Why, I just love those adorable red socks.

Uh, yeah.

I guess I was in the mood
for something funky.

Well, don't forget
to brush your teeth, dear,

and wash behind your ears.

Sure. Sure. Thanks for reminding me.

Oh, Aunt May, don't ever do that
to me.

I've got to finish this history assignment
on the landmarks of New York,

or I'll flunk for sure.

And the only way for Peter Parker
to reach the library in time

is to go as our friendly
neighborhood Spider-Man.

Mmm, now to steal the second object
that I'll need for my master plan.

[laughs]

Boy, I better move it.

Only two hours left
to finish my assignment.

Oh. The old Spidey sense is tingling.

Well, there goes my homework.

Spider-Man, what do you want?

You try anything,

and I'll call campus security.

Forget security.
This looks like a case for Roto-rooter.

Spider-Man, you got to help us.

It's trying to steal
our priceless moon rock.

Uh-huh. Now, that you need me,
I become Mr. Wonderful, huh?

There.

Maybe that'll hold him.

Hey, cut it out! Let go!

Let go!

[thud]

Boy,

I got to be more careful of what I say.

Okay, Doc, if that's the way
you want to do it.

I blew it this time.

Doc outsmarted me.

He's got his metal arms on remote control.

Seems he's gotten away, Spider-Man.

Fortunately, he left
this valuable moon rock

and took a worthless piece
of quartz by mistake.

Forget it, lady.

Dr. Octopus doesn't make mistakes.

That piece of quartz meant more to him
than the priceless moon rock.

And it's up to me to figure out why.

[Spider-Man] Let's see, uh.

Landmarks of New York City.

Ah, here they are.

[phone rings]

Hello. Oh, how are you, Mr. Jameson?

Oh, fine, fine, fine. Never better.

Let me speak to Peter.

I'm sorry, Mr. Jameson. Peter's studying.

- Could I...
- Studying!

What do you mean studying?

The Diamond Exchange was just robbed.

I need him to cover it.

Well, you'll just have to get
someone else, Mr. Jameson.

Peter must finish his homework.

Thank you for calling.

You're so welcome.

- What was that, Aunt May.
- Oh, nothing, Peter.

Just Mr. Jameson
and something about a robbery

at the Diamond Exchange.

Mmm. Must be big stuff
for the man himself to call.

If Doc Oc is behind the robbery,
only Spidey can stop him.

And then this strange powerful tentacle
grabbed the diamond and...

[stutters] And disappeared
into the air vent.

[Spider-Man] It's Doc Oc, all right.

But I don't get it.

Stealing little bits of jewelry
isn't his style.

I got to learn what he's really after.

[electricity crackles]

There. My tentacles are now

ten times as powerful as they were before.

At last, I'm ready to put
my most daring plan into action.

Now, to home in on Doc Oc.

- [man] Look!
- [woman] It's Spider-Man!

[man] What's happening?
He's going into the sewer!

Hey, Spidey!

Sorry, folks, no time for autographs.

Uh, but you may applaud if you wish.

Yuck. No wonder no one's ever
found his hideout.

He can have it.

Ooh, my spider sense
is ringing like a fire alarm.

So this is where I'll web my camera.

That's funny. There's no one here.

But my spider sense
has never been wrong before.

And it's not wrong now,

Spider-Man!

Hey, it's nice of you to greet me
with open arms, Doc.

This is will be the last greeting
you ever get, web-swinger.

You have any last words?

If it's all the same to you,
I like to start with

help!

I've had enough of you jokes, Spider-Man.

You sure? Did I ever tell you
the one about the

[laser-blaster fires] Hey!

You could've waited
till I got to the punch line.

Well, a little web shot will fix you.

Oh, great. It's clogged with water.

A pity, Spider-Man.

But my deadly tentacles are waterproof.

And this sonic quartz vibrator
will paralyze you!

- [high-pitched sound blares]
- Aah!

I can hardly move.

How lucky you are?

You'll be the first to see
how my new tentacles work

like this diamond saw!

Thanks for the free show.

When's the commercial?

Sorry, web spinner,

the show has ended for you forever!

[laughs]

Hey, ix-nay on the bath, Doc.

I never take one without my rubber ducky.

[laughs]

If I can't break these bars,
it'll be bye-bye Spidey.

I can't even budge 'em.

If I don't break loose,
it's the end of Spider-Man.

And even worse,
I won't get my homework done.

It's time to raise the periscope
and find my first helpless target.

There it is.

A super tanker
filled with millions of barrels of oil.

Now, for the final phase
of my master plan.

First, my laser tentacle
will stop the ship.

We've lost power!

Excellent.

Now to immobilize the crew.

It's no use.
We better call the Coast Guard.

[high-pitched beeping]

[all scream]

That noise!

My diamond drill
will cut through this tanker

as if it where butter.

Now, all I have to do
is pump the oil into my secret tanks.

Soon I'll control all the world's oil.

And with it, I'll control the world.

Boy, I never thought I'd envy a goldfish.

Hey, there's what I need.

A bottle of acid.

But how do I reach it?

A spider line is my only chance.

Don't fail me now, you little squirter.

Got it.

This has to work.

There isn't time for a second try.

[deep inhale]

[gasps]

Whew. I'll never take a bath again.

Uh-oh. Hope the water
didn't spoil my snaps.

Well, can't worry about it now,

not while that six-armed nutcase
is still on the loose.

[Jameson] Why isn't that
no-good Parker around when I need him,

all the photographers I can get?

All of New York's oil is being
drained away under our noses,

and he's doing homework.

Uncle Jonah, who needs
that pipsqueak Parker anyway?

I'll get you all the photos you need.

Hey, oh... [chuckles]
good idea, Mortimer.

- Take the Bugle's helicopter.
- Right.

And, Ms. Brant, try to get
a hold of Parker again.

And if his aunt answers,
say it's a wrong number.

Strange, there's no sign
of Doc Oc anywhere.

Extra! Extra! Read all about

the mystery of the vanishing oil.

Hey, can I believe
my little shell-like ears?

Get your Daily Bugle here!

Paper! Paper.

According to reports
from the U.S. Coast Guard,

super tankers are being
mysteriously drained

of all their oil.

I should've guessed.

That's what Oc is up to.

[beeping]

Uh-oh, there goes my beeper.

Must be Aunt May.

What's happening, Aunt May?

Peter, wherever did you run off to?

Uh, I had some more research to do.

Well, I hope you're not
studying too hard, dear.

I don't want you to exhaust yourself.

Uh, no. I'm taking it real easy, Aunt May.

But not too easy, Peter.

We still want you to get
an A on your homework.

Oh, boy. What a mess.

Not a trace of Doc Oc,

and at this rate I'll never
get my homework done, either.

How will I face Aunt May?

Hey, wait a minute.

Why didn't I think of this before?

If I can rewire my radio

to the frequency to Doc Oc's
sonic oscillator,

I may be able to hone in on him.

[beeps]

It's working.

Okay, Doc, ready or not, here I come.

There's no sign of trouble anywhere.

I got to get some photos
and show off that flaky Peter Parker.

Hey, what's that?

It's Spider-Man!

Quick, follow that no-good web-slinger.

These tankers have no defense
against my superpower tentacles.

Mmm, everything looks okay from here.

I'll just set up my camera
and check down below.

Sheesh. That guy's got more
tricks up his tentacles

than a magician.

Well, ol' Spidey knows
a trick or two himself.

The oil's off. It stopped.

Something must have jammed.

I better check the surface.

Spider-Man!

I'll take care of that
meddling wall-crawler

once and for all!

Hi, neighbor.

Greetings from your welcome wagon.

Forget it, fool.

Nothing can penetrate
this atomic glass I created.

Why am I tackling
the most dangerous crook on Earth again?

I ought to have my pointy head examined.

Hey, look, it's Dr. Octopus.

And he's really singing it to Spider-Man.

Hey, Oc, you keep this up,

and it'll be the end
of a beautiful friendship.

Whoa. Any lower,
I'd never need another haircut.

Hey! Now you've gone too far.

[beeping]

Great! [Laughing]
Spider-Man just got nailed!

And for once, I'm scooping Peter Parker.

Uncle Jonah will jump for joy
when he sees the photos I took.

Someone's spying on me
from that helicopter.

This will stop them.

Dr. Octopus!

He's spotted us! Let's get out of here!

Oh, no! He's got us!

Hmm. Looks like I'm about
to become shark bait.

Stop struggling, or I'll put
soap flakes in your fishbowl.

Oh, no! The doc's got Mortimer trapped
in the Bugle helicopter.

Almost hate to break it up.

Those two deserve each other.

I'll teach those fools
to snoop on Dr. Octopus.

[ship's horn blows]

We've slipped his grip.

Let's get back to the Daily Bugle.

Wow. Just what I've been waiting for.

All I have to do is trick
Doc Oc into going there.

[chuckling] Yeah. That's all.

Surely that web-headed weasel
doesn't think he can escape me so easily.

You've run out of tricks, web-slinger!
This is the payoff!

You can say that again, doc!

[alarms blaring]

What's the matter, blue eyes?
Cat got your tongue?

This is Captain Gerard
of the United States Navy.

We'll take him from here, Spider-Man.

Uncle Jonah?

- Hey, Uncle Jonah!
- Huh!

What is it? Can't you see I'm...

Oh. Mortimer. It's you.

I got great news!

I just took some pictures of Spider-Man
getting finished off by Dr. Octopus.

Spider-Man finished?

Well, don't just stand there.
Let me see 'em.

Haven't even seen them myself,
Uncle Jonah.

- Just got them from the lab.
- Quick.

What... These pictures are totally blank!

Is this some sort of joke, Mortimer?

Oh, no. That laser blast
must have ruined them.

I swear, they were incredible,
Uncle Jonah.

Dr. Octopus sent Spider-Man
to the bottom of the harbor.

Funny. That's not the way I saw it.

It was Spider-Man
who clobbered poor Doc Oc.

Well, uh, hey.

Say, these...
these are pretty good, Parker.

If you didn't waste
so much time doing homework,

they'd probably be a lot better.

Oh, no. My homework assignment.

It's due in 10 minutes.
I'm gonna fail for sure.

Well, you can't win 'em all, my boy.

The important thing is
we got these great shots

of Spider-Man web-swinging
all over New York.

All over New York.

That's it!

See you later, J.J.!

Wait! Where are you going with my photos?

Parker!

Why, Peter, you got an A
in your history class.

That must have been a really
excellent report you wrote.

Well, uh, I didn't exactly
write a report, Aunt May.

Instead I used the pictures
I took for the Daily Bugle

to make a photo essay

on the landmarks of New York City.

The prof loved it.

Why, they're lovely, Peter.

But they would have been perfect

if that horrible Spider-Man
hadn't been there

to ruin every one of them.

[closing theme music playing]