02x02 - Fire and Rain

[bunniefuu]

All right, Julia, wake up your guests.
Beginning simulated attack sequence.

JULIA: Just my lousy luck, Rhodey,
my wise-mouthed friend.

Fifty weapons trained on you
and none authorized to fire.

[CLEARS THROAT]

Ladies and gentlemen,
I'm Julia Carpenter,

Chief Operating Officer
of Stark Enterprises.

Say hello to Goliath,

Stark's answer
to your national security needs.

[ALL EXCLAIM]

Well, it's show time, folks.

JULIA: w*r Machine can maneuver
more quickly

than any hostile craft
you are likely to encounter.

What? Who turned out the lights?

[BEEPS]

GOLIATH: Emergency Defense Mode.
Response lock down.

JULIA: Uh-oh. Badjuju.

[ALARM BLARING]

The weapons, they're online.

w*r Machine, hustle your tin butt
out of there. Goliath is armed.

Julia, what're you trying to prove
down there?

Is this about me
not picking up the tab at lunch?

TONY: HOMER, what's going on
at that airbase?

Why is my system
firing at w*r Machine?

[STUTTERING] Sir, the city-wide power
loss appears to have triggered

Fort Goodwin's red alert.

And your generator's power spike
didn't do me a world of good, either.

TONY: Iron Man Armor, engage.

[LASER FIRING]

[w*r MACHINE GRUNTS]

Got to sh**t.

w*r MACHINE:
They've knocked out my power.

[w*r MACHINE GROANS]

Get me out of here!

IRON MAN: Hang on, Rhodey.
I'm right behind you.

Sure, why not?

I...

lam...

I am Iron Man!

I am Iron Man!

I am Iron Man!

I can see the headlines now,

"Tony Stark nailed
by his own missiles."

Why did I have to build
those things so well?

[w*r MACHINE GASPING]

It can't end like this.

Joey, grab the stick!

w*r MACHINE: Not like Joey.

Joey, Joey, J09]'-

w*r MACHINE:
Please, just not like this,

not trapped in this iron coffin.

[BEEPING]

Come on, Jimmy.
A joke's a joke, but this isn't funny.

Help your old boss man here, pal.

Iron Man isn't supposed
to let his friends die.

[PANTING]

[MUMBLES]

Rhodey.

No, Joey! I can't...

It's cool. Rhodey, you're safe.

Come on, Jimmy.

[PANTING] Tony. Oh, man.

You don't know how good it is
to hear your nasty old voice.

Watch your mouth, wise guy,

or I'll dock you
for lying down on the job.

I still write the checks
around here, you know.

Maybe. Maybe not.

The press has already lynched
Stark Enterprises for failing in its duty

to prevent the city's power outages.

We better start fixing things
or it's gonna get uglier than Jim here.

How nice to see you, too, chuckles.
What's going on?

The power is down throughout the city,

and three of our major operations
systems have gone kablooey.

The chaos is major.

Yeah? What about those 17 backups
and 28 fail-safes you always stick in?

I thought all Stark stuff was goof proof,

except, of course, for line man
over there.

As I assume you are referring
to me, Mr. Rhodes,

I must inform you that ongoing
diagnostic analysis has revealed,

as usual, no hardware malfunctions.

Perhaps you would like to help me
find the human error?

[FAST BEEPING]

JIM: Stinking computers.
Of course it's not their fault.

All they did
was sh**t me out of the sky.

See, it's not a malfunction, Tony.

It's personal.
Computers just don't like me.

Sir, incoming transmission.

People of the city, hear me!
The day of our liberation is at hand!

What's this? Time warp 1968?

Tonight's blackout was
a mere sample of our strength.

If $10 million is not delivered to us
by midnight,

the People's Freedom Front
will plunge the city

into an irreversible maelstrom
of chaos.

Firebrand has spoken!

Well, it sure was nice of him
to clear everything up.

- The man's a born entertainer.
-Even fools can be dangerous.

FIREBRAND: This corrupt world
will listen to us!

Our bold actions tonight
will force them to.

[PEOPLE CHEERING]

I will not be ignored.

Millions depend on our courage.

The people's exploitation by the rich
is a great tyranny,

and worst among many tyrants
is Tony Stark!

[PEOPLE CHEERING ON TAPE]

Go now, brothers and sisters!

We have much to prepare
before midnight.

History will honor our great triumph.

[PEOPLE CHEERING ON TAPE]

And if Stark's
personal bodyguard interferes,

[LAUGHING MANIACALLY]

so much the better!

JULIA: Any signs of
our angry, young firebug, Tony?

None yet, Julia, but I'll keep looking.

- Just be careful out there, okay?
- Yes, dear. I'll...

JULIA: Tony? Problem?

JULIA: Tony!

Tanker's heavy.

JULIA: Tony, answer me.

Tony! Ton]'-

Look, he's moving.

[COUGHING]

Hurry, get out of here.

Hey, man, we can't. The gas.

[MEN GASPING]

IRON MAN: Move!

[MEN CLAMORING]

[GASPING]

[GROANS]

Go to auxiliary power.
Either I've got iron poor blood

or it's time for a recharge

somewhere less exciting.

- Up for a spot quiz, HOMER?
-Yes, Mr. Tony?

Firebrand looks to be
targeting energy sources,

big ones. What's left?

[BUZZING]

Emergency override. Trouble at Stark.

[SIRENS BLARING]

This Firebrand jerk's really got some
big brass ones for hitting headquarters.

Keep it away from those transformers!

Welcome back.

Seems our system saboteur
just graduated himself to arsonist.

- Firebrand do much damage?
-JIM: It's weird.

The man was able
to mess with Stark systems

enough to shut down
the automatic sprinklers,

but then he only started
a couple small fires. I don't get it.

I've run triple checks on every living
employee with level 1O clearance.

- They're all clean.
-Gee, what a surprise.

- Every living employee?
-That's right.

Well, looks like
it's time to raise the dead.

IRON MAN: Okay, HOMER,
lock and hold on frame 348.

HOMER: Searching.

IRON MAN:
Initiate enhancement program Orion.

[BUZZING]

Okay, so he's cleaner.
He's still one ugly...

Whoever he is,
he's never worked for Stark.

Initiate overlay Xerxes.

[GASPS] It's Simon Gilbert.

Wasn't he a member
of the Stark board?

JULIA: Yeah.
But he's been dead for years.

Yes, in part because of me.

Some bad investments ruined him.

He tried to embezzle
some of it back from the company.

Simon Gilbert wasn't a bad man.
I hated having to fire him.

He hated me for doing it.
Simon had a brilliant mind,

but he couldn't get past his rage.
He tried to destroy Stark Enterprises.

In the end, he only destroyed himself.

- He did, however, leave a son.
-JIM: An angry son.

TONY: You know something?
Simon could have passed on

a great deal of technical information
about Stark Enterprises before he died.

JULIA: These Stark fires
don't make sense.

If Firebrand wanted to destroy SE,

he certainly could have
done the job right.

That midnight deadline still bothers me.

He's not just threatening us.
He's threatening the entire

city. Wait a minute.
This was all a diversion.

- He needed to keep Iron Man busy.
-So he could do what?

Plunge the city
into an irreversible maelstrom of chaos.

Who do these kooks
get to write their speeches?

Fire up your w*r Machine Armor,
Rhodey,

and meet me at the Rockson refinery.

- Why there?
-Hey, the guy likes to blow things up.

Where would you go? Let's move.

Yeah, let's.

[BEEPING]

FIREBRAND: Pride goeth before the fall.

The city refused our demands.

Let the suffering be on their heads.
They shall pay for their arrogance.

[EXCLAIMS]

IRON MAN: Hello, pot? Kettle calling.

Fireworks are over, Firebrand,

or would you like
to be called Gary Gilbert?

You.

You and Stark k*lled my father,
and now you're going to burn for it!

[COUGHING]

[FIREBRAND CHUCKLING]

FIREBRAND: How does it feel,
Iron Man?

Struggling with no hope, like my father.

Inferno Armor, modify.

Stark and his greedy world must pay!

[BEEPING]

IRON MAN: We already did at the office.
Your father destroyed himself, kid.

Don't follow in those footsteps.

Huh?

HOMER, where's my power gone?

HOMER: Heavy exertions
with no solar recharging

have left your new armor
nearly depleted.

I believe you're simply out of gas.

IRON MAN: And nowhere to recharge.

Divert remaining weapons power
to thrusters.

Maybe I can keep my dance partner
busy till bogey's ready to tango.

If there's one thing
my father's death taught me,

it's always have a backup plan.

Can you hear it, Father,
the roar of your vengeance?

Not one Stark creation
shall be left standing,

no buildings, no people,
not one blade of Stark grass!

IRON MAN: What'd our grass
ever do to you?

FIREBRAND: No!

[FIREBRAND GRUNTING]

You can't stop it! No one can!

[BOTH GRUNTING]

Rhodey, where are you, pal?

No!

Adapt for Hydro Armor.

Not enough power.
The suit's not adapting.

I sure hope
I don't get water up my nose.

Divert energy to plasma map.

That used to work so well.

Uh-oh!

[COUGHING]

w*r MACHINE: Tony!

Not the water.

I can't.

[PANTING]

Gotta... Gotta do it.

IRON MAN: Thanks.

[IRON MAN COUGHS]

I was starting to think
you'd gone to a movie.

- I've seen all the good ones.
-Yeah, thanks, pal.

[BEEPING]

- Thanks for the power boost.
- I'll send Stark the bill.

Now riddle me this, boss man.

How do we keep
a billion gallons of water

out of those neighborhoods up there?

IRON MAN: Loosen up, w*r Machine.
It's time to improvise.

Hang on, Firebrand,
while I take care of your business.

NOW!

w*r MACHINE: Nice shot.
Flood waters in the side pocket.

Now to wrap up
one very soggy loose end.

[GRUNTING]

Justice! We demand justice!

IRON MAN: Funny, that's just what
these police do best.

Your paid lapdogs can't hold me.

Stark will pay
for what he did to my father!

IRON MAN: Kid, you'll never know
how much he already has.

JULIA: Stark Enterprises has
everyone's system back online.

[REPORTERS CHATTERING]

JIM: I gotta give her credit.

Julia's got the press
eating out of her hand again.

I guess Stark Enterprises dodged
a major laser blast tonight.

TONY: Thanks to a couple of lapdogs
in metal suits.

- Last time, partner.
-What?

You need that flying jail cell of yours
to keep you alive.

I don't. Don't ask me to wear it again.

Rhodey, you can't be serious.

Look, back at that flood,
I nearly bailed on you, man.

- I can't forget that.
-I don't know what to say, Jimmy.

I'm here for you on the ground, partner.
But up there,

you're gonna be flying
the unfriendly skies alone.

Rhodey, wait!

sl*ve MASTER: Faster, you sand rat!

[THE MANDARIN GRUNTS]

You'll have to do better than that
if you expect to see another meal.

A thousand apologies, O grand one.

[THE MANDARIN GRUNTS]

[MAN CHOKING]

[HORSE NEIGHING]

[HORSE TROTTING AWAY]

[THE MANDARIN CHUCKLING]

[THE MANDARIN
LAUGHING MANIACALLY]

I...

lam...

I am Iron Man!

I am Iron Man!

I am Iron Man!

'