01x10 - Close Encounters of the Weird Mime

[bunniefuu]

Ah-hyuck.

♪ H-h-h-hit it ♪

♪ Like father, like son ♪

♪ You're always number one ♪
yes!

♪ Best buddies, best pals ♪
♪ yeah ♪

♪ You always seem
to work things out ♪

♪ Can't you see
you're two of a kind ♪

♪ Lookin' for
a real good time? ♪

Whaa-ooo-h*-h*!

♪ A real good time ♪

♪ Report
to the goof troop ♪

♪ And we'll always
stick together ♪

♪ Always
stick together ♪

♪ We're the goof troop ♪

♪ The best of friends
forever ♪

♪ Side by side
wherever we go ♪

♪ We're always ready to roll ♪

♪ Now gimme a beat ♪

♪ We're the goof troop ♪

♪ And we always
stick together ♪

Gawrsh.
♪ We're the goof troop ♪

♪ The best of friends
forever ♪

♪ Now we're calling
everyone ♪

♪ Come along
and join the fun ♪

♪ Report to
the goof troop ♪

♪ La do be da bop
la ba do bop ♪

Yeah!

Okay. Earth,
venus, pluto, mars.

Round and round
the sun and stars.

Max: mars falls
out of orbit, take 11.

Peej, this is totally tweaked!

I thought you said this science
project was gonna be fun.

This is fun. See?

Please!

Just looking at it
makes my eyes yawn!

Come on! It's not
that bad, really.

Yes, it is. Really.

Look, bro, if you wanna
ace this project,

You need somethin' pizazz-ier
than a bent coat hanger!

Like what?

Think creative!
Visual! Cosmic!

With comets, quasars, novas!

Supernovas! Chevy novas!

Hey, yeah.

You need something
now and wow...

A video!

Wow! Just like in the movies!

Hey, wait a minute.

Don't movies take
a lot of time and work?

Trust me, space cadet!

Come, come, come, mr. Goof,
you must push, push yourself!

Think creative. Visual.

Okie-doke!

Shh. No, no, no, no, no, no.

Remember, remember,
mimes do not talk.

[Squeal]
good! Good! Good!

Now let us practice
the mime cards, shall we?

Ready?

Scissors!

Tree!

Chicken!

[Crowing]

Duck!

Oh! Interesting.

Congratulations, mr. Goof.

You have just passed the
arthur humanities school
of street theater.

Really? Gawrsh!
Wait till I tell max.

Now, get yourself
a flashy costume,

Then go out there
and dazzle 'em!

Dazzle. Yes, sir!

[Squeal]

Don't ever speak
while performing!

Nuh-uh!

Keep an eye out
for talent agents.

You betcha!

And remember!
Reach for the stars!

Ah-hyuck! Okie-dokie!

[Exclaiming]

Looks like I've trained
another genius.

Pj: what about costumes, max?

I mean, come on! We can't
invade earth in blue jeans!

I'll think of something.
I always do.

Ta-da! What do ya think?

Dad's taking
a pantomime class.

What's he wearing?

Tin-foil. Dazzlin', huh?

Guess what I am.

Gawrsh! Hey, max,

I'm headin' downtown
to perform my act.

Wanna come along?

Uh, oh... I'd love to, dad,

But I gotta help peej here
with his homework.

[Sighs] oh, okay.

Well, gotta go
reach for the stars!

Oops. Can't talk anymore,
starting right now!

Sheesh! Thanks, dad!
Come on, peej.

Wait, man! This is
gettin' kinda fun.

Later, mr. G.

Found it!

Nuts. I forgot
this needs a vcr,

And ours is broken.

Well, that's that.

I know! We'll use your dad's!

Hey, man! We touch my dad's
stuff, boom, he'll plaster us!

[Humming]

Peg: oh, pudgy-poo!

Over here, snookums!

Oh my, it looks wonderful!

Is it that pottery kiln
you promised me?

No, it's a barbecue! Ha ha!

This baby'll roast an ostrich.

Oh, then I better get
some food ready.

Oh, here. Try this.

Thanks, pookey.

You like it?

Yes! What is this stuff?

Tasmanian tar roast coffee.

It was on sale,
so I bought 50 pounds.

Yuck!

Hmm. Maybe I could use it
for charcoal lighter.

[Humming]

Mornin', son!

Whoa! Stop! Time out!
Hold it right there!

Oh, um, dad! Uh,
I need to borrow the vcr

For my science project.
And what happened

To the ping-pong ba*ls
I gave ya?

Uh i, I'm making a science
fiction video instead.

Well, forget it!

But why, dad? I mean, you...

You see, son, a man's
home is his castle,

So that makes me king.

King of the house,
the boat, the barbecue,

The bowling trophies,
and especially the vcr.

So that royal stuff
is off-limits

To peasants and such
like yourself.

You understand?

Uh, sorta.

Good.

Put it back.

Well, looks like we're
just gonna have to build
that model after all.

No way! Your dad said
we couldn't move the vcr,

But he didn't say we
couldn't plug in to it.

Huh?

Max: pipe wrench.
Pj: check!

- Hammer.
- Check!

- Saw.
- Bingo!

- Screwdriver!
- You got it!

Uh, are you sure
you hooked it up right?

Uh, yep! Piece of cake!

Most folks are techno-wimps
compared to me.

Now, all we gotta do
is load her up here

And start filming
back there.

[Whistling]

[Pete grunts]

Hmm! Shouldn't have bought
that cheap cement.

Now where am I gonna
find an audience?

There's someone, I think.

I'll try my chicken
impression.

Max: man, every so often,

Dad actually comes up
with a good idea.

I told you he looked
like an alien.

Okay, now talk weird
and make lots of threats.

Ready? Action!

Attention, earthlings.

We are tinfoilians
from planet luminum.

Uh, yeah. Luminum.

I repeat, we are tinfoilians

From planet luminum.

That is 3 zillion light years

From your miserable
little planet.

i am maxell tdk,
and this is...

pj: uh, c-3-p-j.

max: our mission?
quite simple--

to take over earth!

Pj: yeah, and shut down
all your schools!

that is right!
we demand to speak

to your leaders
immediately!

Uh, yes, sir. Uh,
we're getting a signal

From somewhere
in outer space sir.

a scout has been sent
to communicate our demands.

please cooperate
or we'll dust ya!

But, sir, he's got a weapon.

Well, it looks like some kind

Of sub-vacuous plutonic
extricater, sir.

[yelling over phone]

Panic indeed, sir.

Let's just hope the public
doesn't see this.

max: that is right,
earth-noids.

our scout has
super-alien powers!

he can disintegrate a building
with the wave of his hand.

[Gasping]

Hey, a whole crowd!

[Crowd mumbling]
did you hear that?

Find your own window. Aah!

Oh, boy!
A c*ptive audience!

[All gasp]

[Thinking] shucks.
They're already amazed,

And I haven't even started!

What is he doing?

Careful! I think he's
building a force field!

Gawrsh! Must be
talent agents.

I wonder if they
like my get-up.

Don't let him get away!

Get him!

Now, now, folks. Come on.

I'll still do free shows
after I'm famous. Ah-hyuck!

Gawrsh! Now I know
how elvis felt!

No autographs, please!

[Thinking]
gawrsh. I must be
in a tv studio.

Hey, this might be
my big shot at stardom.

Ah-hyuck!

Better practice
for my audition.

Amazing!

Why, he has the ability
to actually lean

Against invisible
gamma rays!

Observe, earthlings!

C-3-p-j is calculating
our attack.

we plan to steal
all your planes and food

and national monuments
and...

pj: and, uh, cordless shavers

and pogo sticks,
uh, and toothpaste!

Oh, oh, baby! I ain't nothin'

But the rembrandt
of rotisseries!

Daddy! Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!
Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!

Aliens have invaded
spoonerville!

You interrupted
my art alliterations
for a cheap joke?

But it's true, daddy!

Cosmic invaders bent on
planetary annihilation

Are out there
this very instant!

See? Now ya got
her doin' it!

Oh, shut your yap
and open your eyes!

Whoa! Ow, ow, ow! But, cereal!
But muffin cakes!

we are not joking,
earthlings. Observe!

this used to be
calamityville!

ha ha ha ha! And we liked
calamityville! You're next!

that broadcast
just seen moments ago.

now, please, folks, remember.

do not panic.

just run for your lives!

Both: told ya so!

M-m-m-martians?

Now, honey, now you've got
to hurry and pack your things

Because we have
to leave right away.

No! We stay!

Why, I worked hard
for this stuff,

And no drool-dripping moon-man

Is gonna lay
a tentacle on it, see?

We're gonna fight back!

He knows what a typewriter is.

Sirs, we've tracked down
the alien signal.

It's not coming from space.

It's being sent
from right here on earth!

Aliens have landed
in spoonerville!

Uh, um, um, peanut-brittle,

Are you sure we shouldn't
just leave town?

A man's house is his castle,
so I'm digging a moat.

No galactic goon
is gonna come along

And wreck my royal stuff.

Uh, petey, what exactly
are you doing?

Uh, well, I'm--i'm
building a blockade.

[Helicopter whirring]

It's them! Peg, get in the house
and block all the windows!

Oh, dear! Now I'll never
get that freezer defrosted.

Looks like everyone's
disappeared.

Wait, what's that?

You'll never grill on this
earth man's barbeque!

You cosmic creepos!

Guy's lost his marbles.

Fear, probably.

The moat! Gotta fill the moat!

Empty!

Tasmanian tar roast!

Let's see them bug-eyed,
pointy-eared tin-heads

Get past this!

Now what's he doing?

[Laughing]

- What's that?
- A smoke signal?

This is flying duck to homeboy.
We found the alien landing site.

Send all units.

Surrender now, earthlings!

Resistance is useless!

So is that
an a+ project or what?

Oh, yeah, I liked the part

About turning
lincoln's memorial

Into a video arcade!

Come on, let's go
watch the tape.

[People clamoring]

Whoa! What happened
to my house?

Since the alien broadcasts
began this afternoon,

Nasa has been able to capture
this martian scout.

And authorities now believe
other aliens have landed here

And are holding this family
c*ptive.

Take this, mr. Spock!

[Screams]

Max, what have we done?

Shh! Look, there's only one
way to clear up this mess.

- Fess up?
- No, cover up!

First we gotta save dad!

[Grunting] you sure they got
your dad in here?

[Grunts]
nasa headquarters, right?

Now hustle your buns.

Hmm. This looks bad.

It is bad, gentlemen.

And just who are you?

Greetings, colleagues!
I am doctor maximillian,

And this is professor
peejfield.

Uh, we, we're from the
federated league of, uh...

Um, uh...

Intergalactic body language!

- Yes, thank you, professor.
- My pleasure.

Wait, I've never
heard of the fed--

Oh, no! Professor,
do you see that?

- Max: this is terrible!
- What is it?

He says he's, uh, uh,
cutting out of here!

Why would he do that?

Pj: uh, 'cause he's
not feeling well.

Uh, we thought so.
What's wrong?

Quite simply, he's got
the cosmic chicken pox.

Is that dangerous?

Well, first your teeth
all change position,

And then--and then
your ear wax melts.

This is followed
by house-itosis,

Bloated liver and onions,

And male pattern baldness.

And worst of all,
it's very contagious.

[Stuttering]
uh, uh, contagious?

Every man for himself!

Run! Run!

Come on, dad!
Let's vacate!

We gotta get
out of here right now!

But everyone's gone! See?

Gawrsh! What happened?
I was doin' so well.

What are you
talking about, dad?

The tv try-outs!

But this isn't a tv--

I wanted to make you
proud of me.

Ah! But I am, dad.
I thought you were great.

No, I was terrible.
Now I'll never get on tv.

Oh, yes, you will!

Gawrsh! What's goin' on
at pete's house?

Uh, they're filming
a science-fiction show.

And they want you in it.

- Really?
- Yeah.

The talent agents
told us about it.

- They did?
- Shh!

Now, put your helmet on,
dad, and I'll fill you in.

Okie-dokie.

First, you gotta make
a grand entrance.

Peej here will help you.

[Chatter]

Eat hot phosphorus,
you venusian varmints!

Death rays! Death rays!
[Yelling]

Quick, mommy! Those disreputable
martians are trying to get in.

Fire!

[Screaming]

[Crashes]

I think we goofed.

Wake up, sugar-socks.

Uh, those aliens
must've got you!

Can we stay for
the cartoons, mama?

Ow! Say, p*stol-pumpkin,

How about a nice glass
of water for daddy, huh?

No thanks. I'm not thirsty.

Scientist:
we come in peace!

We want to talk to you!

Never, you purple
people-eaters!

Let 'em have it, jelly-jar!

Fire!

You want my bowling trophies?

Well, come and get 'em,
you solar sissies!

This is danielle wrathmaker
signing off.

Ahem, uh, excuse me!

I have an
announcement to make.

The alien has escaped. Look!

- [All gasping]
- he's gone.

There's one on my roof?

Allow me to interpret for him.

The martian says

The walls of mankind
are closing in on him.

So he's decided to return
to the windy plains of mars.

And he, he's not going to
destroy earth after all.

He's leaving now!

Farewell! adios, muchachos!

It's working, peej.
It's working!

Yikes! It's not working!

Oh, no, you don't.

You don't wreck my house
and get off scot free!

[Grunting]

[Goofy exclaiming]

Look, the aliens
have left for good!

[All whooping]

See, peej? Nothing to it.

Hey, where you goin'?

I'm gonna look for those
ping-pong ba*ls and start over.

Gawrsh! By the time
I woke up,

The tv crew had gone.

That's okay, dad.

I think we're too good
for television anyway.

I was thinkin'
the same thing, max.

That's why I dug up
this here brochure

On hopi indian dancing.

Now, classes start monday.

You and I could work up
a great routine

And take it on the road
or somethin' like that there.

[Groans]

Look what them slime-dripping,

Flat-footed martians
did to my barbecue.

Boy, if I 'em here,

I'd make 'em sorry
they were ever hatched.

It's a good thing you're
a million light-years away,

You foil-covered morons!

[Yells] alien eggs!

[Exclaiming]

Oh, so that's how
you make mashed potatoes.