01x08 - Fish Floaters/Dollars and Fish

[bunniefuu]

[BUBBLING]

[SINGING] One, two, three, four

Who's that knocking at my door?

Five, six, seven, eight

Hurry up and don't be late

Nine, ten, eleven, twelve

Got a secret I can't tell

Flap your fins, flip your tail

School's out, ring the bell!

La la la la

Ooh

La la la la

Ooh

La la la la

Ooh

La la la la

One, two, three, four

Who's that knocking at my door?

Five, six, seven, eight

Hurry up and don't be late

Nine, ten, eleven, twelve

Got a secret I can't tell

Flap your fins, flip your tail

School's out, ring the bell!

[SNORING]

Look, I'm gonna level with you.

I haven't actually read today's chapter,

so I have no idea what to do
for the next 37 minutes.

-[DOOR OPENS]
-STICKLER: Baldwin!

Suspend all teaching immediately.

I have an announcement.

Oh yes, sir, Principal Stickler.

Class, if anyone needs me,
I'll be out wandering the halls. Mm!

Nurse Fishington, if you please.

Attention, students.

As you know, homecoming is almost upon us.

And, as is tradition,

we will need a grand float
to lead the homecoming parade.

Students, I want you to come up
with different themes for the float,

and we will use the best one.

Hmm. Ooh ooh, Principal Stickler,

I have an [SINGSONG VOICE] idea!

Oh yes, the fake redhead.

[GROWLS]

Ahem, I feel that the theme

which best captures
the essence of homecoming

is the theme of beauty.

[EXCITED CHATTER]

Eh, Principal Stickies!

You, the child who looks like a dinosaur.

My fellow classmates, I have an idea

that's way better than Bea's...

the theme of radical.

-I like it!
-I like it too!

[BOYS CHANTING "WHOO"]

Come on, Milo,

we already decided we were using my idea.

Hmm, a little friendly competition.
I love it.

All right, everyone, here's a new idea
I'd like to float by you.

-[RIMSHOT]
-Heh heh.

The boys will build one float

and the girls will build another.

Tomorrow morning at Freshwater Stadium

I will select which is worthy
of leading the parade.

This will also decide who is better...

boys or girls.

Well, good luck, Milo.
You guys are gonna need it.

Ha, more like won't,

because I have a plan.

All right, gentlemen,

what is, like, the radicalest thing
that you can think of?

-Ninjas!
-Rock 'n' roll.

-Brontosaurus?
-Uh...

Jocktopus!

Yeah yeah yeah.

Those are all pretty rad,
but not nearly as rad as...

-this!
-ALL: Ooh!

Wow, Milo, that's actually really good.

Yeah. With a float like that
we'll win for sure.

Oh yeah, I have total confidence

that nothing those girls can do
could ever touch this.

With that being said,
I think the first thing we should do

is send someone to spy on them
and find out what they're planning.

-That's a great idea!
-Yeah, but... but who?

Hmm, it should be someone
who's really good at talking to girls

and someone with really soft hair.

-[DOO-WOP MUSIC PLAYING]
-[GIRLS SCREAMING]

Oh, face it, Steve Jackson,
you are irresistible.

You have to be our spy.

Here here, take these notes, all right?

If anyone becomes suspicious,

just read what I wrote
and everything will be fine.

Hey, Finberley.

-[DOO-WOP MUSIC PLAYING]
-[GIRLS SCREAMING]

[GASPS] Steve Jackson,
you know my name!

Yeah, I'm really good with names.

Here, let me help you with that glitter.

Oh, thank you.

How about I help you carry it
back to your team?

On the way, I'll listen to you talk
about how your day is going.

I love you, Steve Jackson.

[NEW WAVE MUSIC PLAYING]

And for lunch I had another sandwich.

-[GIGGLING]
-Seriously? No way.

Hey, Bea, I'm back.

Great. Did you get the... [GASPS]

-[DOO-WOP MUSIC PLAYING]
-[GIRLS SCREAMING]

Steve Jackson! [NERVOUS LAUGH]

What are you doing here?

-Hey, Bea.
-Steve Jackson carried the glitter for me.

Oh, isn't that dreamy of him?

Yeah.

Wait, shouldn't you be helping out
your own team?

This is very suspicious.

Ah, use the note thingies!

Ahem, "Girl, you so fine.
You can trust Steve Jackson.

"Can me see float now?"

[NERVOUS CHUCKLE] Okay.

I actually have the blueprints
right here and... Wait a minute!

Did Milo send you here
to spy on our float, Steve Jackson?

Well, yeah.
Can't blame a guy for trying, right?

I don't.

But now, as much
as it kills me to say it...

I'm gonna have to ask you to leave.

It's cool. Later.

[MOTORCYCLE STARTS, TIRES SQUEAL]

All right, ladies, listen up!

Those boys think they're clever,

trying to spy on us.

But two can play at that game.

We're gonna spy on their float,

and we will do so
using the stealthiest, cleverest,

most resourceful master of disguise
this world has ever seen.

I'm a man!

Uh, Milo, we have a situation.

Oscar, please.

I am trying to put together
a soundtrack for the float right now.

La la la

-Let's play sports!
-Hey!

I love my car!

I have to burp.

Look, Clamantha,
you can't be here right now.

Wha? Who is this Clamantha
you speak of?

I am a boy like you.

Let's do some boy stuff.

Like... jiu-jitsu.

Somebody please help me!

Huh? [GASPS]

Clam with a mustache!

Dah!

-[SCREAMING]
-[TIRES SCREECH, CRASHES]

-[CAR HORN HONKING]
-Oscar, what is all the commotion about?

Uh, I think the girls sent Clamantha over
to spy on us.

Wh... wh... what?
I cannot believe they would do that!

Oh h* h* h*, well,
three can play at that game,

only now the name of the game is...

sabotage.

OSCAR: A stink b*mb?

Nice!

So, uh, who's gonna do it?

Not nice.

Uh, hi.

What is taking him so long?

Green Apple to Blue Wizard.

Blue Wizard, do you copy?

BEA: So, thought you could
sabotage our float, huh?

[SCREAMS] What have you done
with my brother?

Don't worry. He's safe.

But he had to be punished
for that little stunt he tried to pull.

They're teaching me how to crochet.

It's actually really fun, Milo.

You monsters!

That's right.

From now on,
Oscar is crocheting for the girls' team.

He's our brother now.

h* h*, you have crossed the line, Bea.

I hope you're prepared
for the consequences.

Oh, we are ready for anything
you can dish out.

Well then, I guess we'll see you
tomorrow morning.

Tomorrow morning it is.

I... I hope that you have
a pleasant evening?

BEA: Bye, Milo!

Milo, wait!

It doesn't have to be this way!

It's too late for you, Oscar.

You've already been brainwashed
by their cooties!

Oh, boys, prepare to be humiliated,

because we're sure to win
when Principal Stickler sees... this.

[CHOIR VOCALIZING]

-ALL: Whoa.
-[WOLF WHISTLES]

Feast your eyes
on our beautiful Fish Mermaid Princess,

with matching handbag and accessories.

BOTH: What what?

Yeah? Well, that's...

nothing compared to this...

Our Radical Party Robot

with surround sound and lasers for hands!

[METAL MUSIC PLAYING]

I'd like to see your float
bring the party like this.

It's nice, but you know,

there's one thing your float is missing.

Ahh!

Albert, hit 'em with the macho laser.

Ahh!

Ha!

[SCREAMS] Shellsea, Piranhica,
defensive maneuvers!

[SCREAMS]

Clamantha, Koi, counter-attack!

All right, girl power!

[GRUNTING]

Guys, we were all hoping
this moment would never come,

but now there's no turning back.

Time to mess up their hair!

BOYS: Yeah!

[SCREAMING]

BOTH: Ahh!

Albert, get us out of here!

[GRUNTING]

My fins aren't strong enough.

Ahh! Everybody, jump for it!

Abandon ship!

Move your tail, Oscar.

-[ALL SCREAMING]
-[GASPS]

All right, what's going on?

Why is there so much exploding out here?

Oh my, this is the most...

-incredible thing I've ever seen.
-KIDS: Huh?

What finer way to celebrate homecoming

than with the greatest theme of all time?

Me!

Which team is responsible
for this masterpiece?

Uh, well, I guess it's sort of a...
collaboration.

Yeah!

Well then, that means...

everyone's a winner!

-[CRICKETS CHIRPING]
-[FARTS]

ALL: Hooray!

[CHEERING]

Oh, I'm sure glad
we're all back together again.

I mean, what would I do
without my favorite gal pal?

Yeah. I learned that
when it comes to boys and girls,

we're all equal.

And in this case,

we're all equally immature.

Oh well.

And I learned that crocheting
is a fun leisure activity

for fish of any gender.

Look, I made you both sweater vests!

-MILO: Oh, uh...
-BEA: Oh, wow.

BOTH: Thanks, Oscar.

[NEW WAVE MUSIC PLAYING]

[SIRENS WAILING]

So, what up, guys?

-What...
-[SQUEALS]

It's Brandon Bubbler!

Shawty

You know how I do

I'd like to dance with a girl like you

So Shawty, don't let my dream unravel

Come with me

We'll kick it on the dance gravel!

That new Brandon Bubbler song
is [SINGSONG VOICE] on fire!

-Four flake shakes, please.
-Chocolate!

Chocolate gives me pep.

Who wants to go with me
to see Brandon Bubbler this weekend?

Albert, when did you get here?

Uh, I've been here the whole time.

Here, now we can see you.

Would you like to come with me
to get tickets?

Uh-huh.

Four flake shakes.

Slurp slurps!

Hiya, toots.

Ugh, Randy, what do you want?

Oh, why the cold shoulder, babe?

Is that any way to treat
your future husband?

She's not gonna marry you, Randy!

She's gonna marry me!

I... I mean meat-eating snails?

Sorry, I'm taken.

Randy, I told you before
I'm not interested.

Are you sure?
'Cause I got money, lots of money.

I could even buy you tickets
to that concert you wanna see.

-Money.
-No, thank you.

-We can afford tickets on our own.
-That's right.

Eh, it's cool. I can take a hint.

Actually, I don't need to take a hint.

I can buy as many as I want.

I'm Randy Pincherson!

-Let's get tickets to that show.
-All right!

Here's the money to buy mine, Oscar.

Looks like I've go... just enough. Yeah.

[ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYS]

-All right!
-Great!

So, who's paying for mine?

Uh, you are.

Ha, you guys.

You know I don't have any money.

I'm not even sure where money comes from.

Money comes from jobs, Milo,
like we have.

For example, I babysit.

Story!

And I tutor.

-Tutor!
-What's this?

-That's a book.
-Prove it.

Jobs are t-terrible.

Milo, you gotta get money somehow.

We won't give it to you
and neither will anyone else.

But they could
if they worked a little bit harder.

No. You need to work for your money.

We can't support you anymore.

We've done all we can.

If I were meant to be on my feet all day,

I'd be born with feet!

[SCREAMS]

[TIRES SQUEAL, CAR ALARM BEEPS]

We did the right thing, didn't we?

We did the best we know how.

[WHIMPERS]

OSCAR: Je suis exhausted!

I never wanna see another
fish French book again.

Yeah. Well, those guppies
cry for hours and hours at a time.

At least your students
can feed themselves.

Well, not really.

[CRYING]

Here. [SIGHS] It never ends.

Oh, hey, it's Milo.

I bet he's sorry now
that he knows how hard it is to...

-[HIP-HOP MUSIC]
-Make money

-Uh, let's get it...
-[ALL GASP]

-Money
-Unh, unh

Yo, make money

Let's get it
Unh, unh

What? I just put a bike rack out front.

Milo, what happened?

Well, a little of this, a little of that,

and mainly a whole lot of...

this!

Milo, did you get a job?

-No.
-Well, I guess this means

you'll be getting your own ticket.

Ticket? But of course.

Did somebody actually give you money?

Yeah. Randy Pincherson.

Randy Pincherson?

That doesn't make any sense, Milo.

Why would Randy just give you money?

Because he didn't just give him money.

That's bad business.

That was a loan.

Yep, a friendly loan,
also known as a donation.

No. If you recall our agreement...

This is a loan, Milo.

You have to pay me back, every cent.

This is not a donation.
Do you understand?

Absol-tively.

Hmm.

I got it!

Just give me another loan
and I'll pay you back with that.

Whoa there, cowboy.

You've gotta pay me back
with your own cash,

plus 300 percent interest by tonight.

And if you don't, you get the pinch!

Pinch pinch! Pinch pinch!

Pinch.

[WAILING]

You monster!

Please don't pinch me, Randy!

[SQUEALS] Anything but the pinch!

Fish gotta swim, crabs gotta pinch.

See you tonight.

I'm Randy Pincherson!

Dude, you really should have
just gotten a job.

Come on, kids.

This place stinks of death.

I'm gettin' pinched!

Darn it!

I was hoping to find
some cash under these cushions,

but all I found

was a half-eaten cookie
and an old baseball card.

Maybe I can sell it?

But who'd wanna buy a half-eaten cookie?

-[DOORBELL RINGS]
-Who is it?

-RANDY: You've got my money?
-[CLAWS SNAPPING]

Uh, Milo's not here right now.

Can you come back later?

Yeah okay, sure.

Oh. Ha ha.

Well, that worked better than I thought.
Right, Randy?

[SCREAMING]

So, you got my money?

Would you take a cookie instead?

Hey hey hey, thanks.

Pinch!

That was just the warm-up.

No money, you get the big pinch.

Ah, no no, not the big pinch.

[DISTORTED] Pinch.

[WHIMPERING]

Why didn't I just get a job?

OSCAR: Randy, what are you doing?

We paid his debt,
so you wouldn't have to pinch him.

Ah, man, I was just messin' with him.

Can't a crab have some fun?

S-so, you guys paid Randy back for me?
[GASPS]

So, I'm not getting pinched?

Not today.

I'm Randy Pincherson.

Oh, thank you, guys!

I learned that friends
always come through.

And if you wait long enough,

everything gets taken care of for you.

That's not the moral of this story.

Ugh, we paid your debt
so Randy wouldn't pinch you.

Because of your recklessness,
we're broke!

What are you saying? [GASPS]

No matching shirts at the concert?

No shirts and no concert!

We had to sell our tickets
to get enough money.

Poor Bea is beside herself.

[SOBS] I saved for years to see Brandon.

MILO: That's impossible.

You guys were loaded.

So were you... yesterday.

[SNIVELING]

I'm so sorry, guys.

You were selfish, stubborn and lazy.

That's not being a good friend.

Oh, well...

[SOBS] I guess you'll wanna take me
to lunch now.

Take you to lunch? Ooh!

This was the last time, Milo!

You get no more chances.

Come on, Bea,

let's get out of... here.

Oh. [GASPING]

[FARTS]

Yeah, let's go.

Oh, they're gone!

Randy should have pinched me.

I've gotta get my friends back
with a little thing called... work.

Chief, I'm here to work.

Everything's under control.
I don't need any...

[CLEARING THROAT]

[CUSTOMERS CLAMORING]

All right, fine. Come with me.

The only thing punks like you
are good for

is operating the cash register.

No!

Pfft. Look, all you do
is press the button here

and put the money in the tray there.

You... monster!

Hey, it's really really simple.

A baby could do this.

Even this baby?

Sure.

Hey, listen, I gotta get back to cooking.

Don't screw this up.

[SOUL MUSIC PLAYING]

Shawty, you know we gots to work

So, when I see you needin' money

I just pull up my finstraps

-And oh
-All good

Money...

Whew.

Shawty, we got a long way to go

But if we get the money, yo

It's all good.

Let's see how you did.

Okay, it's all...

Wait, what's this?

What? What did I do?

Oh no, there it is.

Okay, here you go.

I... I earned it.

I worked.

This isn't enough.

Not enough to pay back my friends, dude.

Well, take that thing and sell it, genius.

[SINGING ALONG]
I got a case of l-u-v, you see

I'm like, O.M.G.

Shawty, wanna be with me?

F-i-s-h to the... to the l-u-v

[SINGS] Friends are friends for eternity!

-Get outta here, Milo!
-No no no.

-I got us tickets.
-BOTH: What?

But that's not all.

[BOTH GASP]

Milo, this is everything you owe us.

Yeah, count it. It's all there.

Milo, does this mean you worked for this?

[BEA SHRIEKS]

That's right.

Now, are my two favorite fish
ready to party?

Hooray!

I'm like, O.M.G....

Ah, we're here.

I'm here for you, Brandon!

F-i-s-h to the l-u-v

I've got a case of l-u-v, you see

I'm like, O.M.G.

Shawty, want to be with me...

[SNORING]

F-i-s-h to the l-u-v.

SNAKE: What's in the bag, Mouse?

Well, I got quite a deal, my friend.
Big shoe sale!

Mid-and low-rise boots,
mid-calf casual dress boots,

platform pumps,
ooh, the girl righteous pumps,

short-cut booty cuffed,
short-cut booty regular,

ballet flats, cha-cha heels,
high-heeled boots,

slouch leather clogs,
slouch leather clogs wide...

-And all on sale.
-Oh, that's nothing.

I always get half off. [CHUCKLES]

MOUSE: Oh, please.