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04x09 - Survivor: Part 1

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Game Changer". Aired: September 20, 2019 – present.*
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Show is based on one central theme: the players start the game knowing nothing.

04x09 - Survivor: Part 1

Post by bunniefuu »

- [Announcer] Get ready
for a Game Changer.

Tonight's guests

Ally Beardsley!

Brennan Lee Mulligan!

- Hiiiiiiiiiii.

- [Announcer] Lou Wilson.

- Hey. Cha cha ching cha cha ching-

- [Announcer] Erika Ishii!

[Laughing]

- Ooooohhh!

- [Announcer] And that's not all

Grant O'Brien!

- What!

- [Announcer] Katie Marovitch!

And last, but not least

Raphael Chestang

- Yeah, I'm back.

[laughter]

- He's back!

- And your host...me!

I've been here the whole time.

This is Game Changer.

The only game show where
the game changes every show.

I am your host, Sam Reich.

I am joined today by these seven -

Count 'em!

Seven lovely contestants.

Now, you all understand
how the game works?

- No

- It's the point.

- That's right.

Our players have no idea what game it is

they're about to play.

The only way to learn is by playing.

The only way to win is by learning.

And the only way to begin is by beginning.

So without further ado, let's begin

Players, this is without a doubt,

the most talent we have ever had

on the Game Changer set at once.

Unfortunately, it's time to say goodbye

to one of you.

- Oh. What?

- It's gonna be me.

- Already?

- Players.

It's time to vote.

- Oh, I knew it, I knew it!

[contestants chanting
a Survivor-esque tune]

[singing]

- I don't really know what's happening.

- Sam says we're going
to eliminate someone

right off the bat.

People are whispering to each other.

It's like, oh, it's Survivor.

We're doing Survivor.

- This is Survivor, for sure.

Which sucks because now I'm not

a good sport about it.

I love Survivor so much.

I wanna win.

- Ally. You're up.

- And what are we voting for?

- I can't believe it

- Samuel.

- Can we vote for anything?

- Yeah.

- Can we strategize amongst each other?

- Yeah.

- Wait, Ally

- What did you vote for?

- I'm voting for Sam.

- Yes.

[clapping]

- Brennan.

You're up

- Yeah.

- If Sam gets eliminated.

- Then one of us has to host.

- If Sam gets eliminated,
Grant hosts 100%.

- You strategized amongst
each other players.

But if you try to break by game,

it's only gonna blow up in your face.

- Oh no.

Lou!

- This is hard.

- Stay strong.

- There are too many of us for there

to be a true prisoner's dilemma.

And I trust you implicitly.

- I trust you implicitly

- What about me?

- I trust you implicitly.
- You trust me?

- No, we can't be forming
alliances already.

- You can't do that.

You can't do that to me.

- They've done studies of
the prisoner's dilemma.

It's only hard in abstract.

People solve it all the time in real life.

- Erika. It's your vote

- Okay.

- Katie, if they all vote for Sam,

and you and me vote for Lou,

we could really get some...

- Holy sh*t.

- Now we're playing the game.

- Do you need more

to vote for Sam than what just happened?

- I'm voting for Sam.



Don't worry.

- Grant O'Brien.

- Oh my Lord.

- What am I gonna do?

- Just don't do that.

[singing]

- That's how it ends?

- Yeah, exactly.

That's how it ends.
- ...it's a conch doing

- Katie Marovitch.
- ...I think, yeah.

- I think it's conch but I could be conk.

Well, any case people on the internet

will scream at me either way.

So that'll be great.

- Raphael Chestang.

- Come on, Raph.

- He's back, baby

- This is what we play for.

- Voting?

- In a way, it is.

- It's what George Washington played for.

It's what Thomas Jefferson played for.

- Wooden Teeth.

- All right. You're finished.

- Bye Sam

- f*ck' toast, my dude.

- So who'd everyone vote for?

- Sam.

- I voted for Sam.

- Hey, if we vote for Sam all day...

- Players.

I will now read the votes.

- Uh oh.

- First vote.

Sam.

Does not count.

- Oh, come on.

Oh, come on.

- Okay. Okay. Okay.

- The whole day is just voting.

- Second vote.

Sam.

Does not count.

- You're a write-in candidate!

- We're gonna have to vote again.

- Third vote.

Sam

Does not count.

- Interesting.

- Fourth vote.

Sam.

Does not count.

Fifth vote.

Sam.

Does not count.

- Uh oh.

- I wonder what the next one's gonna be.

- Sixth vote.

Sam.

Does not count.

- Okay at least I know I trust all of you.

- The first person voted out

of Game Changer: Survivor...

Katie.

- What?

- Who did it?

Who did it?

- I swear it wasn't.

- Katie. I would never do that to you.

- Who did it? You're dead to me.

- As God is my witness,

I wrote down Sam's name.

- Nobody did that.

No one did it. It's Sam

- He's turning us against each other.

That dirty little man.

- Yes.

- Do you have any last words?

- I think it was you.

And I think you're a bad man.

- You may leave the stage, Katie.

- You're gonna have to get security.

- Bye-bye!

Bye, everyone.

- Bye, Katie.

- The second I figured out

that it was like an elimination thing.

I was like, I'm always
gonna be first to leave.

I'm only gonna be here for five minutes.

- What you have, there is a fart machine.

An advantage that you can give

to someone else that you want to see win.

[fart sound]

- Interesting.

- That's right players.

You are in our first
ever elimination game.

In it, you will face challenges,

battle it out for immunity,

form alliances,

and if you're clever,

be the last person standing

here at the end of the day.

This is Game Changer: Survivor.

- Oh my God. Knockout,
Watchout, Dropout. I love it.

- The winner of this episode

will receive two round trip plane tickets

anywhere in the world

they would like to go.

- Wait. What? Really?

- Yes.

- No, no, no, no.

This is how it begins.

- Anywhere in the world?

Maldives?

- Sure.

- Madagascar?

- Keep going.

- North Korea?

- Ooh,

- Got you there, baby.

- I've been on Game Changer before.

The prizes aren't bullshit.

And so pretty quickly, I'm like

Well, I'd like to win.

- Six players left.

An even number,

which good for forming teams.

- We are gonna get buffs.

- This is insane.

- Ally.

- f*ck. I haven't watched Survivor.

I don't know...

- Oh my God,

this is kinkier than a buff.

- Come on, I want it.

- Come on, come on.

- Oh no!

[laughing]

- Oo.

- I don't like this.

- Wow.

- Okay, it's like team Ireland versus-

- The racial makeup is...

[laughing]

- This is sort of a Cook Islands callback.

- Okay guys.

Let's do this for white people.

[laughing]

- Can I request a transfer?

- I would like to also transfer.

- Good. Here we go.

Here we go.

- Blue team.

What is your team name?

- Don't you talk.

- Don't.

It's not up to you.

- Team Friendship?

- Team Friendship, question mark.

- Yellow team. What is yours?

- We're Martin Luther King's Dream.

- Wouldn't it be awful if we were to lose?

- That's what I was going to say.

- You were gonna suggest

Martin Luther King's Dream for us?

- But I got silenced by my teammates.

- Players, it's time for your first

immunity challenge.

- Oh my God.

- Here's how it's gonna work.

Standing in front of your stumps,

you will try to make each other laugh

using funny sounds.

- Sorry guys.

We've all seen my
episodes of Breaking News.

- It's okay.

- If you laugh, you are out.

If you make yourself laugh, you are out.

Let's have everyone stand.

You will go as I call your name.

The first team to have all three players

knocked out will be forced
to face elimination.

Ally.

- Um, a little help, please.

- Raph.

- That was a laugh from Ally

Ally, you may sit back down on your stump.

- Brennan

- [high pitched voice] Help me, please.

[still high pitched voice] I need help.

[still high pitched voice]
I'm just a little guy.

- Lou.

- f*ck

- Of course I was gonna be bad at this.

This was designed to eliminate me.

This is like saying there's a height limit

for the show.

We all know how tall I am.

- Even before Lou spoke.

Next up,

Erika.

- [animal calling]

Damn it!

- Erika made herself laugh.

- It wasn't me.

I didn't make myself laugh.

It's it's looking at Brennan

and then just like seeing it all play out

in his face.

- We're all the way back

to Raph.

- [moaning]

- Well done, Raph.

Brennan.

[laughing]

- Raph is out.

- Oh no.

- Just looking at Brennan's
face for too long,

I just crumbled.

The two best men for that challenge,

were the two that were left standing.

- A heads up between two powerhouses.

- Yeah.

- Brennan,

[screaming]

Nothing from Lou.

Next, the ball's in Lou's court.

- Who's is it?

Is it mine?

I just want it back.

My knees.

My poor knees.

- Was that a laugh from Brennan?

It was close.

- Close

- Brennan.

- The meatball fall off

my little plate of spaghetti.

This spaghetti too slippery

for the little meatball.

She pop off so fast.

The strong wind blow all
the noodles off the plate.

Ragu on my niece and nephew.

[contestants laughing]

- Of all the things,

I did not expect a tiny sad Italian man.

- You didn't expect
stereotypes from this team?

Okay.

- Lou.

- Please let me win.

[laughing]

[screaming]

- Yes!

- I did the best I could, man.

I did the best I could.

Got these two dumb crackers
to either side of me.

Beardsley and O'Brien.

f*ck' fold like cheap suits.

Lou, there's not too
much you can do about.

He is a Titan.

- We had a dream!

- We had a dream.

- Martin Luther King Jr's Dream wins,

which means that Friendship?

will face elimination.

- Yeah,

- But before they do,

I will be bringing each
of you one at a time

upstairs to a green
screen for confessionals.

While I do that,

it would be a great
time for you to conspire

with your fellow players.

Form alliances and do
whatever you need to do

to stay in the game.

- Have you formed alliances
with anyone down there?

- Sure. I've formed
alliances with everybody.

- Little alliance, huh?

One,

two.

Okay, good. Two alliances.

- Right now.

Everyone's making alliances as bits

that I think are actually just alliances.

I think everybody's doing jokes

like we're on a team now,

but also I think we're
all just on teams now.

- Alliance! They did an alliance.

I'm gonna get you.

- There's joke alliances

that are just regular alliances now.

Should the three of us?

Should we finally make this thing happen?

- Yeah

- Do I understand these alliances?

Do I understand?

- No.

- I have never seen Survivor.

I don't think I've ever actually seen

an entire episode of a reality show

in my entire life.

- Let me learn you a thing
or two about Survivor.

- Okay. Okay.

- Hopefully, I think I can lean

on some of the people who are a little

more nervous about the
like competitive elements

and assure them that I've got their back

and that I'm gonna take care of them

and we're gonna make it together.

A white person can't win.

- It's just gonna be hard to
beat Brennan. Imma tell you.

- That's the thing.

Brennan is always the one to beat, but...

- Why do you think three of
us are talking right now?

Use them and kind of keep them

in a stable like sheep.

And I'll cut them loose
at a moment's notice

whenever need is be.

- They're trying to sow the seeds

of distrust amongst us.

- Yes.

- I don't like that.

It's us versus Sam.

- And the rest of the crew.

- True.

- And the crew?

- Well, maybe not the crew,

if the crew wants to be in on it?

- That's what I think.

I think we should lead
the revolt of the crew.

Hey, my guy! What are you doing right now?

What you know about an uprising, dog?

- We will bring you in on this.

We will cut you in.

- So who do you think
wrote down Katie's name?

- You.

You. Absolutely.

That was not any of us, right?

Or, just say if it was.

- No.

- There's a thumb on the scale, for sure.

- There was a sleight of hand.

- I think so, too.

Right? Okay.

- Sure.

- Something foul is afoot.

I do not suspect a single one

of those people out there.

Those are all good hearted comedians.

They're not that good at lying.

- You know, Sam's a trained magician

and I think Sam might have done some

sleight of hand to put Katie's name in.

- Your name, had an
underscore underneath it,

which is a little bit of flourish

that a hassled comedian
doing something on camera

would not put a beautiful little flourish

under the name.

That screams art department to me.

That screams someone who actually knows...

- Right now we have a big vote.

Me, a Survivor fan.

Brennan, a huge Survivor fan.

- Yul's one of my favorite
winners of all time.

- Yeah. Cause he's so humble

and he has like an actual,

like good head on his shoulders

- So sweet.

- Grant, not a Survivor fan.

- Are they talking to us?

- Oh my God. We're talking to each other.

- I asked them who they
were gonna get rid of.

And they both looked
at Grant very quickly.

Like super quickly.

- I should lose.

'Cause I'm single.

So I don't have anyone

to use two plane tickets on.

- Oh my God, Grant.

- So if you guys wanna
vote me out, that's fine.

- Clearly, if you've watched Survivor,

the move is to not vote Grant out

because he doesn't care

and get rid of your biggest competitor.

- I'm not gonna lie.

Brennan's the only person

that I'm actually afraid of.

- This is good B roll for

if people are talking
about me in another scene.

You can cut to me sort of eating sadly

on set here by myself.

That could be helpful.

I'm not a good prospect for anybody.

My reputation in competitive games

makes me impossible to
form a true alliance with.

Now, you can probably pull back

into a wide and make me look really small

in the composition.

- Oh man.

What have we got ourselves into?

- No idea.

But do you want an alliance for real?

- Of course.

Why do you think I brought you out here?

- I walked to go to the patio

and Lou and Brennan were out there.

So, I just listened at the door

and they made an alliance for the end.

- Don't tell anybody.

- No, this is us.

- Done deal.

- Hello.

- Hello Ally.

What did you hear out there?

- Oh, nothing.

Oh, couldn't help overhearing

because I was right on the other

side of the door.

- Oh, what'd you hear?

- Whoa.

Sick.

- Oh sh*t

- Wait, let's work out.

- One

- Bring it straight up.
- Two

- Yeah, this is is good.

This is an easy weight for you, huh?

- Is this what it's gonna be like

when we all go to jail?

- I walked up to Grant
and went it's Brennan

and Grant went, Okay.

So maybe that's what we're looking at,

but also maybe that's not very fun.

Maybe I don't wanna go
cutthroat right away.

Like obviously

I'll get voted out at the next turn.

'Cuz everyone knows that
I'm going for blood.

So maybe I should just play it chill

and vote Grant out.

I don't know.

- Before she left

Katie gifted you a fart machine.

- I'm gonna win.

Katie, I love you.

We're going to Europe, baby.

I think we should send Grant home.

'Cuz that's the easiest.

'Cuz he would like to go home.

But strategy wise,

I think we both know,

it would be best to get
each other out right now.

- Let's go to the patio and
talk about how we'll vote.

- Oh my God.

- Let's figure it out.

What are you thinking?

- I think I'm gonna vote you out.

- Cool.

- I'm also down to play it

not cutthroat immediately.

This feels exhausting.

- I feel totally groovy

however you wanna play it.

- Okay. Woo.

- We're back from the break.

And it's time for Friendship?

to face elimination.

Blue team, please step out.

Players, we have just
had a confessional break

where some conspiring
could have taken place.

The question for you is,

was there any conspiring?

Ally, I'll start with you.

- A bunch of different
people were conspiring.

I think there's a lot of ways

that this could go

and I'm deciding to be really cutthroat

in voting Brennan off.

Which I've told him.

- Leaping right into it, Ally.

- I don't like this
posture that I've taken,

but here I am.

- Now for those of you at
home who can't see this,

the rest of our players are standing by

off stage watching what's occurring now.

There are only three
people left at this vote,

which does make it easy for two players

to conspire against a third.

Brennan. How are you feeling right now

listening to what Ally's saying?

- Not great.

[laughing]

I would say that I'm coming into this game

with a pretty distinct disadvantage,

which is just the character persona

in the CollegeHumor,

cinematic universe that I play.

There's a whole Game Changer episode

about me being hyper-competitive.

So, anything I do to make
moves to defend myself

is just further proof to people

that I should be gone at
the nearest convenience.

So, I'm not holding my breath.

- Now Grant,

not being a regular Survivor watcher,

I wonder if you realize
what a position of power

you're in right now.

Ally is coming after Brennan.

Brennan has no choice,

but to go back after Ally.

You have the power

to swing this one way or the other.

- Mm.

- Without putting too
fine a point on that.

Your reasons for voting out Brennan

would be obvious.

The guy is familiar with Survivor.

He is known to be a strategic force.

And you have that opportunity now,

whereas you might not have it later

in the game.

- Hmm.

- What would be the
reasons to vote off Ally?

- There would be none.

- Welp.

- And with that,

it's time to vote.

Lou, can you hit that yell more time?

- Whoa

- That's the alliance.

- Ally, you're up.

Grant.

Brennan.

I will now read the votes.

If anyone has a loop de loop

and would like to play it.

Now would be the time to do so.

- What is a loop de loop?

- I don't know, but
I'm imagining it's a...

- This is a f*cking loop de loop.

- Oh my God!

- Do you think I f*ck around?

- There something back there?

Lou sees an immunity idol in the plant.

- That's totally a thing.

- Congratulations.

You have found a hidden
immunity loop de loop.

- The second I see that, I go, okay.

That thing I noticed on the urn earlier

is for sure an idol.

On the urn I notice a decoration.

The decoration is in the exact style

of the Game Changer set.

And if I had to bet dollars to donuts,

I'd say that's not a coincidence.

I rushed back stage to find Ash and Carly,

our wonderful assistants.

Sorry guys. Excuse me.

And I pull this off the urn.

This of course is an immunity idol.

This is not the immunity idol

that I'm gonna use tonight.

This is the immunity idol
I'm gonna use tonight.

You think I don't know

my head's on a f*ck' spike

the minute I let my guard down?

I go full Russell Hantz.

I go full Rick Devens.

What's up, my dude?

- My man's got that loop de loop!

- Loop de loop.

- I don't know what just happened.

How did he earn this?

- This is an immunity loop de loop.

Any votes cast for Brennan will not count.

- Oh my God.

- Wow!

- You think I'm gonna f*ck' roll over?

You look me in the eyes Beardsley

and say Brennan I think
it's your f*ck' time.

It'll be a cold day in hell,

when I go out like a f*ck' chump.

I'm not a f*cking fool, Sam.

- I am at a disadvantage

by not knowing the rules of the game.

Oh my goodness.

- Alright.

- First vote

Brennan.

Does not count.

- Wow.

- Second vote.

Sam.

Does not count.

Second person voted out
of Game Changer: Survivor

Ally Beardsley.

- Whoa, whoa.

- Obviously

- We agreed to vote for Sam.

I am a man of my word.

- This sucks.

- Ally, before you depart,

any last words?

- Thank you for having me.

[applause]

- Well.

- I got got.

The loop de loop got me.

I think the worst part is that

I got voted out with this in my pocket.

[fart sound]

He is playing like this is Survivor

where it's all like strangers.

But we are actual friends.

So, I will leave this to Brennan.

- Well, I think it's fair to say

that this vote has been

a Game Changer: Survivor game changer.

See you next time.

- Next time on Game Changer: Survivor

Five players remain.

Who will be the last one standing?

- What fun we're having.

[hysterical laughing]