01x09 - Untitled

[bunniefuu]

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hold on time take a deep breath for a

new kind of cartoon show

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we're cartoons and comics collide now to

take you inside and turn the pages near

your host Henry and June

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hi and welcome to KaBlam I'm Henry and

I'm June we're hosts tell us what that

one Henry not be shovel spoon why not

and I'm keeping this brand-new car

[Applause]

every week we bring you a bunch of the

blackest cartoons but like today's topic

Bigfoots stop it I'm confusing them

we're not taught to loose either your

guides to this and every issue of KaBlam

we are proud to present our pageant

winner one new Miss junior beast don't

mind June she's just excited to be on TV

but here's what we do best we turn the

pages for you so brace yourself for

action here's our first comic action

action lead now starring the flesh he's

super strong and super naked Thunder

girl she flies like thunder

stinky diver a former Navy commando with

an attitude as bad as his odor and melt

man with the power to

Mel's today's episode where pigeons dare

we find our heroes at the funeral for

Halina the 22nd

queen of the pigeons whose reign was

tragically cut short by a chance

encounter with a Buick LeSabre the Queen

died with no heirs to the throne only

four eggs in a nest quit screwing around

milkman we've got an important

assignment you guys have to protect

those eggs don't worry about a thing

chief actually I told you guys not to

play catch with the eggs what are we

gonna tell the chief sorry melty I guess

I don't know my own strength

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there's nothing I can do this is how you

protect those eggs the future of the

whole pigeon dynasty rest on our dang

injection-molded shoulders I want

24-hour surveillance and I want it now

milkman and I will take the first shift

action that's freezing

I'd loan you my sweater but it's fused

to my skin do you think the eggs will be

okay maybe we ought to move them inside

I don't know what if we break them relax

we're superheroes remember let me know

what I could let go okay yeah yeah yes

okay girl what is the difference between

melt man and a sack of manure this sack

hi guys you're early

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this will never work you can't replace

pigeon eggs with great a jumbo relax

when the other eggs hatch everybody will

be so happy nobody'll even notice hey

what happened to the other egg

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hey you kids will the action lead get

there in time or will our soft-boiled

superheroes end up with egg on their

expressionless faces stay tuned for the

action scrambled albumin of action now

that's it what happens well just have to

wait till later on in the show just

because we're hosts doesn't mean we get

special privileges now what are you

doing I'm trying to melt you know like

not man with the power to that's

impossible

not man a special training besides we

may be professional comic book

characters but we're not superheroes

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don't say it

all I was gonna say is here's our next

comic sniz and fondue

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[Applause]

captain optic sensors give liquid

they're called tears skin boy I'm gonna

miss you old gal starship hero

convention at the hotel funding special

guest speaker uh Rex tremendo the series

Oh captain slash limiting planet oh this

better books

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almost there 39:40 now start the Vader

backup will run out oxygen in here why

do chill and spot me some altitude good

what do you see

give me a mental pictorial we stopped me

record I'm gonna pry the doors opening

planetoid you're not gonna leave me here

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can't any of you think of a more

original question to ask me planetoid

[Applause]

[Music]

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there are many other space Rangers who

want autographs to please go to the back

of the line that's cute

now go the end of the line why are you

stealing I thought you went to get help

I did but clipping the wallet was the

only way I could get the cowardly phony

tapping flags to help us I'm gonna call

security

you didn't bring the real captain slacks

here because if you did I'd be rescued

in seconds flat so don't try to make me

feel better by telling me you brought in

speed

[Music]

plummeting planetoids oh you tell it

true I'm actually being saved by captain

okay see if you can jump high enough to

grab my wrists there's no way I can jump

that high come on only class a

Starfighter is allowed on this vessel

I'll show you an A an A+ amazing hey man

I said enough of this crud and pull the

jump to hyperspace

speaking of hyperspace what do you say

we go warp speed time to the dealer's

room absolutely hey keep your derriere

in your cherry air still to come life

with loopy Angela anaconda and more

action lead now right here

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welcome back - nice try June let me try

again

okay welcome back to while June tries to

make the perfect couple and sound

remember we're just moments away from

the exciting conclusion of actually but

first here's life with loopy hi I'm

Larry this is my little sister and this

is mom's mystery casserole

every Friday night we've had to eat this

disgusting concoction but we've never

been able to get mom to tell us what's

in it if I told you it wouldn't be a

mystery anymore would it now to loopy

this kind of logic is hard to swallow

and last Friday morning she just

couldn't stomach it any longer I gotta

know what's in that casserole

now who P figured its mom had secrets

she was probably keeping them in that

pantry of hers so at precisely Oh 800

hours she crossed over and plums

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nothing seemed too suspicious at first

but before Law Group II started to

notice that a lot of mom's food was

definitely past its expiration date

unfortunately the next thing to expire

looked like it was going to be loopy you

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[Applause]

fools are you blind can you not see that

this creature is related to the great

chef herself begone you cretins I would

like to have words without honored

guests the condiments and you are a

naughty little girl you couldn't wait

till dinnertime good yeah well my dear

your diligence shall be rewarded go

ahead taste me go on don't be shy

discharge cyber blade it is I've

fabulous fabulous fish sauce delicious

nutritious and purer than slug slime

what I've never been so insulted in my

life don't just stand there you cretins

can this tasteless creature

do you have any last words yeah Yoko I

bet you're the worst taste in food in

the pantry I'd rather eat pickled hams

in you hey did you hear that

dare you how dare you compare me with

this common country pablum labels with

these boots and pounds of cut-price I'm

the king I'm the tasty one and that was

the end of mom's casserole yep thanks to

loopy Friday nights would never be the

same again sorry kids

no casserole today I thought I'd try

something new

mom's pickled yam loaf

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what you doing June whipping the crowd

into a friends and for our next cartoon

anything I can do to help nope just hold

on tight

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[Applause]

cute

action lead now when last we left our

story pigeon Queens

dead heirs to the throne will it be over

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what do you think clear come on breathe

darn it it's over melt man you did

everything you could

let's get back to the nest there's still

one egg there's still hope what now we

wait and so with the faith of pigeons

civilization hanging in the balance the

Action League conducts their lonely

vigil

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get up you lazy sons of plastic you're

lucky I'm in a good mood

those eggs hatched last night one Prince

and three princesses chief they haven't

touched yet have two I just came from

their nest their nest wait a minute

then whose nest is this

[Music]

[Applause]

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you're okay melt man

relax I look great in snakeskin

[Laughter]

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and

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Wow hey KaBlam Boyd's now's the time in

our show where we take a look at some

surprising shorts hey surprising those

kind of shorts this coming

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and now to today's story starring me and

not starring man net man walk

my mom doesn't usually drive me to

school

I miss the bus and I had to wear my

brother's underwear which I don't care

because today is our class and my dad

has let me borrow his authentic airforce

aviation Solar sunglasses and nothing

can ruin my day

nothing except oh it is her man nickname

wha man wha pronounced like an idiot and

she's not even a French did you even

dress normal for the class picnic and so

what if you sit next to Johnny a body he

still loves only me nimiipuu good

morning children

is everyone ready for our class picnic

yes dear I'm more than prepared but at

the moment I'm in direct sunlight and

you know how sensitive my skin is oh

dear and you are just as fair as a china

doll

um mrs. Briggs yes Angela I'll trade

places with her my skin isn't too

sensitive well that's actually very

thoughtful of you Angela

Koren glasses

but take off those ridiculous sunglasses

miss this isn't Baywatch mrs. Franks

since the chewing of gum isn't allowed I

wonder how come there's all this chew

like chewing gum under Angela anacondas

death anyone who cares about us eep-eep

last pick me for the clap

I can't hear you I will tell her on

account of I got gum stuck in my ears

because they're so sensitive to the wind

why Nicky Wicky Doris thread is a

spaghetti sauce here this fresh-made bug

juice will cool you here let me protect

you in this my dear best friend in the

whole world

Nina wasa of the dimwit now you must be

careful of this steepest hill ever that

we just

uh ugh

repulsive I can't believe you're wearing

boys underwear Angela anaconda but our

laundry wasn't finished and and I was

late for school and I had to whatever

excuse me please I believe I left my

homemade gelatin in here which all the

children and mrs. Brinks are dying to

try wait till they hear about your boys

Underpants

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well KaBlam woods we've run out of

action and we've run out of time what's

with you

every show right about now we come out

here turn the last page and then it's

all over

but but what if we didn't turn that page

we could we could be on forever get

alive I'm doing it Hank Skeets

are you with me oh yeah looks like we're

going into overtime

hey turn those back on come on join us

again next time same KaBlam time same

KaBlam Network

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Henry get me out of here