04x05 - On a Roll

[bunniefuu]

[Music]

[Music]

Oh

[Music]

[Music]

[Music]

but great

[Music]

they're in Queens

too bad Eddie three deuces three twos

I'd be ashamed to take a pot with a hand

like that yeah it's funny how people are

different

[Music]

lend me a couple of bucks never seen the

40 bucks you're barred from me already

hey what do you want collateral take my

watch my shoes

how about Freddie for a week makes a

great watchdog if you keep hungry all

right here we don't five-card draw jacks

are better how create it all right

tell that to the collection agency pal

[Music]

give me one this time feel it from the

top of the deck Hill trying to draw to

those inside straight tiny there you go

why don't you just give us all your

money Royal Flush kids changing I can

feel it the golden boy is on a roll

[Music]

I hate to interrupt cleavers at play but

I have a matter of some concern

I'm sorry Freddie but I left my wallet

in the house no sir it's about my father

could I have a semi private conversation

please

you uh you only happen to know his

whereabouts would you seen him for a

couple of days not since our poker game

we haven't seen him since then either at

the game did he seem distraught or prone

to sudden bursts of anger of course

until we started winning winning my

father oh yeah he cleaned our clocks for

over 100 bucks now I'm really worried

with money in his pocket anything can

happen maybe we should call the police

my father gave me two strict rules when

I was a young lad never wake him up

before 9:00 and never cooperate with the

police and once they've got a warrant

all right I'll check the hospital now

you come with me we'll check all these

local hands anticipating your

benevolence sir I prepare to lift the

Tigerlily club Bennie's blast-off tab

let you keep a fleas booby trap what's

this one all right so place out on the

highway it hasn't got a name

not front of just those girls girls beer

and girls

[Music]

yes women over 40 remarry all the time

[Music]

to come in thank you for coming so quick

no problem

I'm lieutenant Bennett and this is

officer know which one of you is mrs.

Haskel sorry to disturb you ma'am

they'll be need more information for the

missing persons report could you please

describe your husband well he's tall

dark and handsome in a skinny sorta way

[Music]

good maybe you should just show him the

photograph does he have any distinctive

features like a tattoo or a scar well he

does have a pretty strange laughs well

it kind of goes like hey hey hey no Gert

I think it goes more like you mean hey

no it's actually kind of

okay okay now mrs. Haskel I'm going to

ask you some questions that may not be

so pleasant but we're only doing our job

go ahead lieutenant thank you

has your husband ever disappeared like

this before and do you know if your

husband has ever consorted with other

women yes has your husband ever dealt

with known criminals or other

undesirable yes you know if there's

anyone that might want to hurt your

husband on your husband will circulate

this photo and file a report with every

division I'm sure he'll turn up in no

time

thank you again officers good afternoon

mrs. cleaver forgive me if I don't come

up with an appropriate compliment on

your outfit today I'm a little down oh

that's all right Freddie just a house

dress can you Tracy your father

no but it's comforting to know so many

others share my concern there's six

bookies who are anxious to find him as I

am his mom much better we finally got

her out of the crawlspace

think hard what is this supposed to cook

itself for an explanation huh oh my god

he's robbed a bank well I can see you

two have a lot to talk about

Seaver before you go I just wanted to

say that man you've always been a beacon

of light for me both in my somewhat

turbulent youth and in the calm waters

of adulthood I just want you to have to

hmm what the heck here's a little

something for you Mary Ellen put it

towards that tummy doll this money come

from Curt life is full of ups and downs

so far mine's been nothing but downs I

never got the cute girl in school or won

the ribbon at the fair not to mention

your numerous business failures thank

you son

but once in every man's life a street

comes along the lucky streak of a

lifetime

Curt my time has come I'm on the roll of

my life what are you talking about the

fortune cookie don't you see it

predicted the whole thing after I

cleaned out all those saps at Wally's I

needed bigger fish to fry so I made a

beeline for Atlantic City Oh Eddie you

know that judge ordered you to stay out

of New Jersey it was amazing everything

I played I won at craps roulette I even

picked the winning numbers in keno using

Bombers birthdate 514 75 excuse me sir

but Palmer was born in January it's in

front of the hotel lobby with all this

dough only what's my next move and then

I see this big bus and suddenly it hits

me the bus know the answer there he was

and stretched out fast muscular and then

he winked at me the Greyhound on the

side of the planet

and I knew why I'd been put on this next

better job behind the ears we have to

talk

can't you see I'm busy Oh Eddie please

don't little bit don't gamble this money

away we could use it we could pay off

the mortgage fix the water heater oh I

could finally buy myself a new bra

what's wrong with the one you've got

you've got it all wrong Gert I'm not

gonna lose money I'm gonna make it have

your toothbrush back to you put my tooth

right in his mouth i boiled it first Bob

is not just a dog Bob is a four-legged

colon be a champion sir of course not

you can't take good odds on a champion

I'm even gonna teach you model ma'am

there nobody will bet on him my little

fuzzy wuzzy

sir perhaps you haven't had time to

fully evaluate this particular venture

Freddie you don't get it I'm on a roll

let me demonstrate

flip a coin sure I don't think that flip

it it's gonna be tails

what'd I tell you I gave miss sir once

again we find ourselves drifting on the

river of opportunity on one shoreline to

land the financial stability and growth

on the other that of high risk in broken

dreams and I think we're going over the

falls again I'm very disappointed in you

and it's a shame because you would have

looked quite handsome in that new

Corvette Convertible mom dad's got

something there I mean we have to strike

while the iron's hot

Freddie you ought to be ashamed of

yourself I am ashamed mom but I really

want that new vet no Eddie this time I'm

putting my foot down

I've taken a lot of bumps from you over

these years you've embarrassed me to the

point where I can't even go to the

beauty parlor anymore why throw good

money down the drain everything for you

the first time you went bankrupt you

stood there and promised me you'd be a

better provider the second time you got

down on your knees and promised me you

change well I'm still waiting and it's

bath time she doesn't know what she's

saying dad she hasn't eaten much since

you've been gone it's sucking up the Sun

Kurt you win what take it you can have

the money take the thirteenth hours for

two thousand fifteen thousand thirteen

five but why quibble over a few pennies

I'm on a roll all I need is a few bucks

to start bobs career and I'm in Fat City

again really

gertrude haskell come on down

it doesn't take like make the woman

happy

50,000

[Music]

you call that a workout he's not even

sweating sir dogs don't sweat they pant

Fredrick open your mouth

if Bob doesn't win tomorrow's race

you can kiss those gold fillings goodbye

I think I could squeeze a few drops out

of them

hey Wally old buddy where you been I

like to ask you the same question

you're supposed to be remodeling my

living room did we sign a contract yes

well you're my lawyer get me out of it

PS we're not made to build houses yeah

I'll say

these hands were made for counting money

for dialing a car phone for saying you

bring me another drink and after

tomorrow's great that's all these hands

are gonna do how can you be so sure you

don't know the first thing about

training greyhounds when you're on a

roll like mine but to know Eddie off

streaks and sooner or later you see

those two flies on the windowsill yeah

what are you gonna put your screens back

up which one you think is gonna leave

first who cares I see the one on a right

you see that I can't miss Eddie will you

listen to me for a minute fellas you

have a wife and two kids who depend on

you

you can't keep betting their future on

roulette wheels and card game look damn

it I wanted to hear sermons I wouldn't

take my walkman to church

come and get it Roberto is Yvonne

[Music]

it's one thing

kidding all right right since I'm gonna

be moving there's fine for use my coin

way

I meant two out of three flip it again

Eddie and if your luck has changed agog

every starting gate

wait what are you open up open up hey

give me my money back I didn't know what

I was doing I was on medication ready

for the start of the game

Pilar needs to like luminous eco and Bob

Pollin quickens it around my neck ever

since you are pudgy the rich kid weighs

[Music]

every day anyway

and at the wire the lousy mileage anyway

the money you won in Atlantic City is

enough to pay off all our debt we're

finally in the black for the first time

in it all because of you

wake up Kurt stop living in a fantasy

world of course I did

I had a sure thing Oh Freddie a Corvette

mom what could I do

well Wally was right Who am I to sh**t

for the stars every time I do they sh**t

back the worst part is that I let my

family down League Young I saw Bob

I know it's not much but here's a

thousand bucks

she won Freddie deserve it a balance a

good time to run hit your wagon from

this old workhorse I'll be leaving now

you deserve better I'm a nag a loser did

I mention I'm a loser you're not a loser

Annie you're just not a very good

gambler we don't want you to leave okay

I'll stay you leave I think what mom

fainted our place is with you kidding

you really want to stay with a bum like

news

then you won't be needing that button

what do you say we have that big t-bone

I've been saving in the freezer who left

something but you really shouldn't be

cooking tonight you were pretty cool

grab your coats it's the least I could

do

oh honey do you think we really should

be spending money in a restaurant who

said anything about a restaurant because

there's a cleaver in which a free meal

[Music]

five thousand nine what do you got what

are you talking about I have a date with

Danny she'll be here in 20 minutes

you can't leave a poker game when you're

winning now sit down and let's play

cards

dad shut up and deal except aces EE and

five dollars after the fair

[Music]

tonight at 7:00 Eastern TBS presents a

movie for anyone who's ever been in love

who's ever felt the happiness or the

pain and learned that love means never

having to say you're sorry

Ali MacGraw and RINO neo love story but

now it's another hilarious adventure of

the new Leave It to Beaver next on CBS

[Music]

you