02x03 - Puppy Love

[bunniefuu]

♪♪

Ah-hyuck.

H-h-h-hit it ♪

Like father, like son ♪

You're always number one ♪

Yes!

Best buddies, best pals ♪

Yeah ♪

You always seem

To work things out ♪

Can't you see

You're two of a kind ♪

Lookin' for

A real good time? ♪

Whaa-ooo-h*-h*!

A real good time ♪

Repor

To the goof troop ♪

And we'll always

Stick together ♪

Always

Stick together ♪

We're the goof troop ♪

The best of friends

Forever ♪

Side by side

Wherever we go ♪

We're always ready to roll ♪

Now gimme a beat ♪

We're the goof troop ♪

And we always

Stick together ♪

Gawrsh.

We're the goof troop ♪

The best of friends

Forever ♪

Now we're calling

Everyone ♪

Come along

And join the fun ♪

Report to

The goof troop ♪

La do be da bop

La ba do bop ♪

Yeah!

The real me,

A poem by wendell frinkman.

Ahem.

"I like coffee. I like tea.

I like recess.

That is me."

The end. Thank you.

Bravo!

All right, wendell!

Thank you, wendell.

That was verybrief.

All right,

Our next poet will be

Rose. Rose beckenbloom.

The real me.

"I am like a flower

"Hidden beneath

A shady path--

"Waiting for someone

"To bring my world

To light.

"Waiting for someone

Who will see

"That, behind my shy

And quiet eyes--

I am a rose,

Waiting to bloom."

[Laughter]

All right, settle down,

Settle down!

That was lovely, rose.

Relax, pj

It wasn't that bad.

No. It was beautiful,

Just like her.

Huh? What are you

Talkin' about?

Peej? Peej?

Peej, get a grip.

I know springtime

Makes folks crazy,

But rose beckenbloom?

Max, her words

Touched me right here.

The real me.

I gotta find her poem.

O.k., Bu

Show some dignity.

Romance

And stale meat loaf

Don't mix.

Somebody's coming!

Whoa!

[Pj]

Max? Max!

Ew!

Ah, great

Well, maybe she didn'

See the real you,

But you did

Find her poem.

Uh, and an exotic

New smell, too.

[Peg] petey-pie,

I'm worried about pj.

He barely touched

His third helping.

Do you think

It's the mumps?

Naw, it's probably

Just your cooking.

Har-har! Har-har!

Just your cooking!

Ha ha. Ha.

Guy humor. How amusing.

Now laugh these dishes

Off the table.

Uh, yes, peach-pits.

Ha-ha. h*-h*.

Curiouser and curiouser.

[Pj]

"I am like a flower,

Hidden beneath

The shady path--"

Hello. Love talk.

You're on the air.

I-- o.k. Well, I kinda

Like this girl, see? And--

Same old story, huh?

Oh, yeah. Right.

But she doesn't know

I like her, o.k.?

So what do I do?

Whatever you do, son,

Don't play

Your hand too soon

In this cosmic dance

Of the heart song.

Don't,

I repeat, don't--

Who ya

Talkin' to, pj?

Santa claus. Now beat it!

Is that clear?

Uh, yeah. Uh, thanks.

Happy love life.

Wow. Wait'll my friends

Hear about this.

You better not!

Gimme your tape deck,

Or I'll blab.

My tape deck?

Dream on, kid.

Pj's got a girlfriend!

Shh! O.k., O.k., O.k.!

You can have it. Shh!

Pj's got a girlfriend!

Shut up!

Whoa!

O.k. What gives?

Uh, just helping p*stol,

Uh, swallow her dessert.

Uh-uh, daddy.

Pj was stifling

My freedom of speech.

He doesn't want you

To know he's in love.

Oh, the big "l," huh?

Thanks, darlin'.

Scoot along.

Well, that's gratitude.

So cupid's dar

Has punctured

My little guy's aorta.

Ha ha!

Is the lucky lady

Under your spell?

Well, not exactly, dad.

She sort of doesn'

Even know I'm alive.

Now, son, if you

Want to rope a filly,

Ya gotta act like a man.

Now put these on

And stand cool, see?

Not like that, son.

Legs apart,

Thumbs hooked,

Head c*ck.

And keep your

Shirttails out.

Sloppy is sexy.

Here.

Boots reek of manliness.

Whoa. You got that right.

Let me see some muscles.

Yeah, but, dad--

Sleeves are only good

For wipin' yer nose,

Boy! Ha ha!

Dynamite! Now belch.

What?

Belch.

Let her know you're there.

[Burp]

No, son.

From your guts,

Like this.

Swallow some air, see?

[Burp]

Releases calories, too.

And then you spit, see?

Do I hafta?

Do you wan

This girl or not?

Well, yeah.

Then do

Exactly like I say.

I guarantee any girl

Will fall for it.

Ha ha! Your mom did.

Son, you be cool.

You be tough.

And you'll always

Be the master.

[Peg] pete,

You get down here

And rinse ou

The creamer!

Coming, flower pot!

[School bell rings]

[Slurps]

[Burp]

Yo, mama.

Uh!

Wait! Rose.

Hey, dude,

Look at my shoes.

Um, I'm sorry,

Marty.

Ain't good enough.

Where have you been,

You bad boy?

The vet is waiting for you.

He's having trouble.

He thinks he's a dog.

Thinks he's--

Oh, yeah!

Ruff! Ruff ruff!

Grrrrrrr.

Bad dog. No kibble

For you tonight.

Aw, she hates me, max.

I know it.

I mean, first the

Dumpster, and now this.

Peej, do you need

A fire hydrant?

So where'd

You get this look,

Redneck monthly?

Dad's idea.

Max, he's ruining

My love life!

Relax, romeo!

I know someone who can

Help you win rose--

Really?

Yep.

An expert of emotions.

A healer of hearts.

Who?

A director of dating.

Who?

A guru of girlfriends!

Who?

Me!

Aw, this is

Gonna beruff.

I don't know

About this, max.

Look, rose is

The sensitive type,

So she's gotta

Like babies.

And if you save one,

She's gotta like you.

Well

Now go get ready.

Bingo!

Waah waah!

Oh, my. That sounds

Like a baby in danger.

Waah! Waah!

But do no

Dial 911, miss,

For I am a trained

Paramedic.

Aren't you a little short?

I'm a para-paramedic.

Waah waah!

You see, although

We are a rugged lot,

We are terribly

Sensitive and caring.

What about the baby?

The baby!

Help! Waaaaahhhh!

Gotcha, max. Whoa!

Ow! Ooo! Eee! Ow!

Yaaah!

[Coughing]

Peej? Peej!

Uhh. Dial 911.

At this rate, I'll never

Get to dance with rose.

Maybe you should

Ask out marty.

You see him enough.

Not funny, max.

Hey there, heartbreaker.

My advice must really

Be paying off, eh?

What?

Looks like those babes

Can hardly keep

Their hands off you.

Yeah right, dad.

Mob city.

How's it comin'

With that chickadee?

You ask her out?

Oh! Abso-tootin'-lutely, sir!

She can't wai

To go with peej here

To the spring fling.

Ha ha ha!

That's my boy.

A credit to your gender,

Just like

Your old man.

Max,

You lied to my dad!

You want him to give you

Some more pointers?

No.

Then show a little

Gratitude, dude.

O.k., But from now on,

No more advice--

Not from you, not from dad,

Not from anyone!

That's the spirit!

I got my own plan now.

I bought rose a present.

Well, all right.

From now on,

I'm gonna stand

On my own two feet!

Max?

Yeah.

Will you give it to her?

[Pj] o.k.,

Uh, all right, listen.

When she comes to her locker,

I'll tell you what to say.

Great.

Where will you be?

Uh, I'll hide in here.

Come on.

Gimme a hand, max.

You don't need a hand.

You need a bulldozer.

Easy! Ow!

Lemme just-- watch it!

Well?

You look like

A canned ham.

[Bell rings]

She's coming!

Hi, rose.

She's here.

Um, "I present this gif

On behalf of

A yearning heart."

I present this gif

On behalf of

A burning tart.

[Pj]

Heart!

I mean heart.

It's

Thank you.

Hey, wait!

We're not done!

Be right back, peej.

What'd you say?

[Pj] "so accept this gif

From my friend pj,

"Who worships

Your every move.

"Please find I

In your hear

To go to the spring fling

With me, my darling."

Oh, hi, marty.

You wanna play fetch?

Fur ball!

And pj?

Has anyone seen pj

Present.

Very well.

Take your seats.

What happened to you?

Marty showed me

His knuckle collection.

Sorry. Rose ran off,

So I had to follow her.

And you want the good news

Or the bad news?

The bad.

She loved the gift,

And she said yes to the dance.

What's bad about that?

She wants to go with me.

Ah, some pal.

While marty's rearranging

My face, you steal my date!

Hey, genius,

Rewind the tape.

You got me into this,

You locker loafer.

Whoa, time-out!

What's the problem?

Marty thinks

He's a dog,

And rose is barking

Up the wrong tree!

Don't tell me.

He's been coaching you

On "how to rope a filly"

And belching, yeah,

And spitting.

Oh! When it comes to women,

Your father is

Full of yams!

I kinda figured that out, mom.

Boy, I'd like to teach

That hamhock a lesson.

Yes! That's it!

Thanks, mrs. P!

You're welcome

I think.

So, max, if you're

Taking rose to the dance,

Why am I going?

So you can dance

With her, dipstick.

But she likes you.

Not after

We switch dates.

I don't have a date.

You do now.

Meet mallory.

Like, I'm totally

Pleased to meet you!

[Gasp]

I'm telling mom you've

Got a girl in your room!

She already knows, honey.

Mom!

And your dad

Will never have to know.

[Pete] pj, you up there?

Oh, yeah?

Hide.

So whaddya think?

Nice, dad. Uh,

Going to a funeral?

Wake up, pj

That's a chauffeur's uniform.

Right. I'm drivin'

You two romeos

To the dance

In a limousine.

He never takes me

Out in a limo.

Uh, thanks, sir,

But we'll walk.

Ya gotta dazzle

Dames with dough!

Speaking of which,

Here's a pair of

Earrings for your gal.

Your mom'll

Never miss 'em.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

[Peg squeals]

D'ju hear somethin'?

My dad probably

Stepped on waffles.

Well, let's get this

Cattle drive goin'.

Moo! Ha ha ha!

Yeah, great.

Meetcha downstairs.

Oooo! Oooooooo!

Not now, mrs. P.

Now run over to

Stevie lish's house

So we can pick you up.

All right, but before

The night's over,

I'm gonna dance

On his windpipe!

Yii!

[Crash]

And tell him max sent ya!

[Honking]

[Pj and max]

Awesome!

So where does this hot date

Of yours live, junior?

Uh, go one block,

Then turn left.

[Pete] ha ha ha!

Nice jalopy, huh?

Go right! Right!

I thought you said left.

[Max] no, right!

[Max]

She made it.

Oops. You were right.

We shoulda gone left.

[Ding-dong]

Wow. Hi.

Yeah, yeah. Hi.

Max sent me.

Max who?

Just let me in, twink!

Thank you.

[Honk honk]

Like, bye, little brother.

See ya later, fer sure!

That's your date?

[Pj] uh, yeah.

That's my boy! Ha ha ha!

[Pete]

Give her the box.

Oh, right. Uh, here, mom--

Mam-- mam-- mallory!

Oh, they're, like, wow.

In fact, they're totally

Like a pair I once had.

Aren't you a little

Old for pj?

Girls mature faster

Than boys.

Gaak!

Feisty

Little filly.

Sorta like peg

At that age.

When max and I get up

To dance tonight,

You talk to rose.

How 'bout I

Just move to siberia?

Relax. Now

Let's get rose.

Thanks for all your help,

Dad. You can go now.

Bye. So long. Leave!

Hmm. Think I'll stick around

And watch my little

Pupil at work.

Say, rose, do you

Like to fast-dance?

Oh, I'm--

I'm not too good at it.

Me, neither.

Aw, too bad,

'Cuz I love hot music!

Ooo, like, me, too!

♪♪

If we don't ge

Some real music,

Our whole plan is shot.

Leave it to me, mrs. P.

♪[Jazz]

♪[Playing along with radio]

They dance well.

Yeah.

Oh! Uh, do you

Want some punch?

O.k.

Yep, looks like

Our job's done.

[Peg] fer sure.

I'll get it.

Now we'll

Just tippy-toe

Outta here.

I'll just tippy-toe

Up your spine!

Hey, pj, I caught this little

Weasel stealin' your date!

Oh, man!

Sir, you don't understand.

Look, kid, I helped pj snag

This fox fair and square.

So you just stick with

Your own date, see?

[Sobbing]

When are you ever gonna

Learn to butt out?

Aw, clam up, missy.

You're worse than my wife.

Oh, that's it!

Muffin tin!

Thanks for

The earrings!

Food fight!

Go after her, pj.

And this time,

Just be yourself.

Thanks, mom.

Sic 'em, boy!

Grrr

Good thing, too.

I have rabies!

You want a napkin?

I only used it once.

Oh, thanks.

[Honnkkk]

Now I'd

Like to be alone.

Ahem.

"I am like a flower

Hidden beneath

The shady path."

That's--

That's my poem!

I kinda dug I

Out of the dumpster.

That was you?

[Pj]

Yeah. And the redneck

And the para-paramedic.

[Giggling]

I think I like

The real you more.

Me, too.

♪[Slow music]

I don't suppose

You'd want to

Sort of dance.

Um, o.k.