01x03 - Boeuf Bourguignon

[bunniefuu]

There you go.

First floor,

right off the staircase.

Has anyone seen my stapler?

Okay. Uh,

"State House Rules."

Where are we?

Doing great.

We got a nice lineup.

Did you get the mayor?

Not yet, but we're

working on it.

I want the mayor, Roger.

Make it happen.

Make me happy.

I'm Roland.

That's what I Yes, alright.

I think that's all,

friends and neighbors.

Whoa! Whoa.

Uh, synaptic misfire.

Almost forgot

the most important thing.

Where are we with

"The French Chef"?

It's been three days.

Oh.

Um

Right.

Look, yeah.

I know.

What do you know?

The show.

She's not a professional.

Uh-huh.

I mean, "A" for effort, right?

At least it didn't

cost us too much.

I liked it.

You did?

I did.

He liked it.

And Tilly loved it.

She made the coq au vin

Is that

how you say it? It sounds dirty.

But she hasn't been able

to stop talking

about Julia Child

with her friends.

Hunter Now, it's not polished,

Hunter Now, it's not polished,

but that's our job,

to figure out what it is,

and I'm intrigued.

Go draw up the numbers

and let's see

if this thing has legs.

Uh, hang on.

Hang on. Hang on.

I'm I'm confused.

We all saw

the same pilot, right?

You really want to choose that

over something like

"The Advocates"?

I mean

Does this plot thicken?

Hunter, Hunter,

with the fire and the move,

do we really have the financial

flexibility to be wrong here?

The funny thing

about being wrong, Russ,

is that right up

until you realize it,

it feels exactly the same

as being right.

I don't think you're going to

regret this, Mr. Fox.

I'll also say

that Tilly's cooking

usually makes me sad

and fearful,

but that meal was divine.

I slept like a baby afterwards.

There's wine in the sauce, sir.

Now, that's true, Rodney,

but either way, I'm compelled.

So off we go.

These are the revised

weekend schedules.

Russ: Wait.

Don't go.

Here.

The numbers for your blessed

Croque Madame.

Okay, well

maybe they don't

need to be this high.

Really? Because we still need

to build a kitchen,

and even if it's

the cheapest kitchen in Boston,

that's still three-quarters

of our budget right there.

Well, what if we were

able to take

And we can't pay Julia,

let alone support staff.

Hell, with those numbers,

we can't even afford food.

You are trying to k*ll this.

It's not tenable.

I don't care what Tilly wants.

Hunter's a bottom-line guy, and

after you itemize these costs

Yes, but we are

looking for something

that audiences want to watch.

You heard Hunter.

People want to watch her.

I'm sorry,

but the numbers are the numbers.

I'll let Hunter know.

Fine, but you're the one

telling her.

She worked

incredibly hard, Russ.

Call her in and give her

an explanation.

La donna è mobile

qual piuma al vento ♪

Muta d'accento

e di pensiero ♪

Sempre un amabile ♪

Leggiadro viso,

in pianto o in riso ♪

Well, if they say "yes,"

the show could be for men, too.

It's for anyone

who likes to cook.

And eat, so, voilà.

Medium rare for you, Paul.

Hockey puck for Pop.

Thank you, dear.

But, uh, cooking on TV?

Is that a thing people do now?

Oh, it is, Pop.

It certainly is.

John, may I offer you some wine?

Ah, no.

Julia, bring me another beer.

We finished them with lunch.

Try Paul's red.

It goes very well with the meat.

What are they paying you

for this kind of thing?

Well, I'm not sure yet.

What's the business model

down there?

Do they even have a business

model for public television?

Well, that's a good question.

Who's talking upsides? I don't know.

Who's talking upsides? I don't know.

Well, what do you know?

John

All I know is that

they've called me in

for a meeting

with the producers.

Now, I'm hoping

that's a good sign.

Pop, I'm being very clear-eyed

about this.

To be honest, I had my doubts

about the whole thing.

But then they saw

what you can do.

C'est pourquoi ils ont appelé

avec cette bonne nouvelle.

Oh, well, I certainly hope so.

Mmm.

E di pensier ♪

E di pensier ♪

E ♪

Mm.

Pensier ♪

So she left Europe

to do a cooking show,

but, uh, what about you?

As we all know, John,

times change.

New administration, new rules.

The foreign service became

a young man's game.

Ah.

So, uh, what are you doing now?

Painting, Dad.

He's making art.

Ah.

Cambridge is a

Is a thriving town.

I'm finding plenty of ways

to keep busy.

Keep busy?

Most grown men I know

keep busy by working.

Well, we're certainly glad

you're still working, Pop.

It took this business trip

to finally get you

east of the Mississippi.

Don't remind me.

And can you admit

that you like the house?

Oh, I do.

It's beautiful.

A very solid house.

And good for the price.

Yes, we were very grateful

for the help.

I did notice, coming in,

the gutters on the south side,

they could use some tending to.

Well, okey-dokey.

Easy-peasy.

Paul, I know

you're keeping busy,

but would it be a violation

of your early retirement

and your delicate hands to tend

to the needs of your house?

Oh, you. Stop it.

Sweetie, you okay?

Julia, I

I wasted a '55 Bordeaux

on a man with no taste

or curiosity.

Let's just go to bed.

Well, you certainly

didn't waste it on me.

And after drinking

that extra glass,

I feel a little like

the farmer's daughter.

Randy and amorous.

I did not choose to retire.

He has no idea what happened

or how these things work.

And then to have to relive

the humiliation all over again

through those questions.

Delicate hands, Julia.

Really?

I practice judo twice a week.

These hands are lethal weapons!

Shh.

You can't take him seriously.

He has a sour word for everyone.

I've finally come to terms

with civilian life,

and and with what

this new phase means for us,

and he comes in

Your father just knows

how to make me feel very small

very fast.

Well, it's his gift.

He's just angry and

And old.

Yes.

When did that happen?

It's almost like overnight,

he's turned into this old man

he never used to be.

I'd love to be working.

You know that.

No, no.

Don't do that.

Don't undervalue what you do

and what we have.

If this meeting goes well

Of course it's going to go well.

This isn't the foreign service.

They don't call you in

to fire you.

Nothing's a done deal yet,

but if it does go well,

we'll be making

this show together,

and I wouldn't be able

to do it without you, Paul.

And I am going to work you

to the bone.

Mm.

Farmer's daughter, you said?

Farmer's daughter, you said?

Giddy up.

Mm.

But it's just a numbers game,

and at the end of the day,

the station can't afford it.

Oh, sh*t.

Yeah. We're sad.

Is this because of the pilot?

I know things got a bit lawless.

No, Julia, not at all.

Making television is chaotic.

We are all used to that.

And you should know that Hunter

is a big advocate of the show.

This decision is purely

a financial one.

Mm-hmm. We tried to wrestle

the numbers into submission,

but the the cold, hard truth

is that they don't add up.

The costs are too considerable.

Yeah.

How considerable?

Uh, I mean

Well, I could build you a set,

but then we'd have to worry

about covering food, and labor,

and

And it's a lot.

Mucho. Hmm?

Well, what's a lot?

Yeah.

I can do that.

Excuse me? Yes, I'll pay for it. Excuse me?

Yes, I'll pay for it.

I'll cover those costs.

Look, I-I know

you're disappointed

Oh, no, no.

No, I'm not disappointed.

This is actually exciting.

If money is our only concern,

I won't let it stand in our way.

Now Now, look

Julia, this is wonderful. No

Julia, this is wonderful. No

But you're you're sure?

Hmm?

Yes!

Let's do it.

John: And then

she fell down the stairs,

skinned both knees

Oh, my goodness.

And landed right at the feet

of Father Wilson

with her skirt over her head.

Yes, alright, Pop.

So yes, class clown indeed.

But always everyone's

favorite wingman.

Well, wingman no more.

Love, this time,

you're the pilot.

Of her pilot.

Uh, let me ask you something.

You're a reasonable,

reasonably attractive woman

of a certain age. Aren't you sweet?

of a certain age. Aren't you sweet?

Would you be prancing around

a kitchen set?

On a television?

Okay, okay.

No, no, I'm I'm proud of you.

It's just that I think

Julia is a natural performer.

If I had half her charm,

I could rule the world.

And speaking of charm,

who wants to make a toast?

Not you, John.

Oh, Paul, no.

And caviar is on the way.

It's just too extravagant,

honey.

Nonsense.

We're celebrating.

We certainly are.

And I would just like to say,

I have had many,

many doubts along the way.

But I was wrong

about the cookbook,

and I hope that I'm wrong

about this television program,

as well.

Darling?

Excuse me for a moment.

Oh.

Sweetie.

Your father's got

some very sharp claws.

Oh, please, he's been

giving those toasts

since I was in the crib.

I don't care about that.

What bothers me is that Paul

went full high gussy

and ordered

a $100 bottle of champagne.

We're celebrating. Yes, and caviar?

We're celebrating. Yes, and caviar?

Does he think we're

the damn Vanderbilts?

Julia!

I said yes.

I said yes, Avis, and

I don't know what I was thinking

or how I'm going to

pull this off,

and I barely looked

at the numbers, and I agreed,

and I said to my father

I wouldn't say yes to anything

without knowing what's entailed,

but he's right!

I'm an irresponsible clown

who doesn't think ahead

Slow down. Slow down.

What are you talking about?

Well, WGBH picked up the show,

but they can't afford

to produce it,

so if I want it made,

I have to figure out a way

to cover food and labor,

and then I have to do it

for 26 episodes.

And I have some of my own money,

but it's not enough,

and if I tell Paul

what's going on, he'll just

think I'm crazy, and I am crazy.

If they want the show,

they should pay,

but the problem is

Yes, I know what the problem is.

I want to do it.

I don't care if it is nuts

or a terrible business decision.

And I supposed I don't even care

that I'd be lying to my husband.

I want it

more than anything, Avis.

Alright then.

Let's do it.

I'm early. I know.

I was just too excited.

I couldn't stay home.

No, come in. Where's the baby? No, come in.

Where's the baby?

I thought I'd be seeing

that little bunny.

She's in the living room,

napping in her carriage,

and I hope she never wakes up.

Ha!

Oh, Dorothy!

Today. I hope

she never wakes up today.

My kingdom for a nanny.

This is Norman's

second time around,

so the baby's my project.

Don't let a middle-aged man

impregnate you.

There are strings.

Well, we're very happy

you're here,

and it's wonderful

of you to help.

You're happy?

When Avis called and said

that you were holding

cooking classes for extra cash,

I just about hit the ceiling.

These women are gonna

fall sideways for this,

Julia, really.

Oh, hello. I didn't realize

we were entertaining.

I thought I mentioned it.

Uh, you certainly didn't.

And, uh, I hate

to be rude, ladies

You? Rude?

But I'll I'll need you

to vacate for a little while.

I-I thought you were going

to WGBH today.

That's tomorrow. First, I need

to take measurements

to pass along

to the set builders.

We can't have that kitchen

we had last time.

Oh, right, of course.

It's just

Well, I have some women

coming over for a cooking class.

A cooking class?

Why on God's green Earth

would you be teaching now?

We need to be focused

on the show.

Dad!

There are ladies present.

Well, good. Can one of them

make me a cup of coffee?

Do you really have time

for this?

This This doesn't

make much sense to me.

Darling

Paul, the classes

are for publicity.

These women will be her base,

and the audience

is the most important ingredient

in a cooking show.

Oh, see what I did?

Ingredient.

I get it.

Keep your day job, Avis.

You'll have to do this

another time.

Uh We start in an hour,

Uh We start in an hour,

and there is a lot to prep.

Many a chocolate mousse

will be mixed on that stove,

and do you know what "desserts"

spelled backwards is?

"Stressed."

And we don't want that

for Julia, do we?

A lot of technique

and a little bit of magic

go a long way.

I simply loved

teaching in Paris,

so I can't tell you

how excited I am

to share the wonders

of la cuisine

Oh! I'm sorry,

my dear. I was

To share the wonders of la

cuisine française here at home.

Would you mind for a moment?

If you'd just take that.

Oh, not at all.

Just go right to

the edge of the stove.

Yeah. Perfect.

So, let's roll up our sleeves

and marshal our wits

and dive in.

Oh, very good.

Now we want to add more butter.

And remember, we want it cold.

Don't be shy.

There's more in the fridge.

One second.

Oh. Excuse me. Excuse me.

Sorry, sorry, I

No, I Okay!

Okay.

And a little sprinkle of flour.

Just use your paring knife

to cut along the outer edge

of the shrimp's back.

Just

Oh.

Golly.

That's perfect.

Now

I'm a Tiger, too.

Oh, I bet you are.

Pop?

Well, that was fun!

- WoDelicious.

- WoDelicious.

- Oh, cheers.

- Cheers.

- Cheers.

- Yes.

This is the mock-up

I'm giving to Russ.

Oh, that's lovely, sweetheart.

Don't you have to write

your outline for Russ tonight?

I just don't understand

why you're doing all this.

We need to get him

out of her hair.

He nodded off.

I have to get her home,

but tell Julia

it was so nice

having something to do again.

I will.

Since Rosie's been born,

my brain has been pudding.

But after today,

as crazy as it was,

I might go home tonight

and work on my dissertation.

Well, look at that.

Mwah.

Ah.

Thank you so much.

Thank you.

Thank you.

That was just like

arts and crafts.

Oh.

Thank you.

Do you think

shrimp is an aphrodisiac?

Mrs. Child?

Oh, it's Julia, dear, please.

Oh, uh, Julia.

Um, my name is Babe,

and, uh,

I just wanted to say, um,

my mother died

earlier this year,

and, um, I've been very low.

My husband hasn't known

how to, uh

Well, it's been hard.

But today was the first day

that I felt like my old self,

so thank you.

Oh, no, Babe.

Thank you.

That means so much to me.

Yeah. Well,

I can't wait to tell my friends

and watch the show.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Have a good one. Good night.

Have a good one. Good night.

Avis:

Well, we got through that.

We did.

I'll stay and clean.

Oh, no, no, no.

You You go.

You've done more than enough.

And take a bottle of wine

with you.

I'll just straighten up here

and get started

on the next episode.

Well, we made just enough,

if it's any consolation.

Was just enough, huh?

To the penny.

Then I'll need to do this

every week.

It looks that way.

Oh, alright, then.

At least we made Babe laugh.

There's that.

Yeah.

Who's Babe?

And then what's really

nice is that in Episode 6

This is all you have for me?

Is that not enough?

No, it's not enough.

You only submitted 12 recipes.

We need 26.

We're doing 26 episodes,

remember?

Okay, 26. Got it.

And they need to be organized.

I don't want a babble of recipes

with no methodology.

Russ?

These counters won't work.

They're too low

for Julia's height.

I gave specific measurements.

Talk to the guys

with the hammers.

This is the schedule.

This is what we have to do

every week.

Script three days

in advance on Mondays.

Run-through on Tuesday.

Food shopping and tech

rehearsals on Wednesdays.

We sh**t Thursday.

Editing begins on Fridays.

Oh, my. Okay.

And you will need to think about

how the season is structured.

Structured? Like

Like which recipes come when.

Oh, structured.

Yes, of course.

I know what that is.

The The spacing isn't right

for the dishwasher.

That all has to shift over!

Our knowledge of television

is only two months old.

Between you and me,

we just got our first TV.

We're lucky to have you, Russ.

Yeah. Well

we'll see.

And uh, Russ, I think

we'll need another foot

between the island and the sink.

Like, I said, talk to

those guys over there.

I've got to get to the set

of "I've Been Reading."

Just wonderful.

Alright, you "guys over there,"

come here.

Come here. Come here.

Just These dimensions

are all wrong.

Just follow my lead.

Someone put a thumb right there.

Right there.

So, satisfy your inner scoundrel

and hie thee to the nearest

bookseller to purchase

"Whoresons and Pizzles: The Art

of the Shakespearean Insult."

Clarence, thank you so much

for joining us.

Thank you for having me, Albert.

Until next week,

dear friends and readers,

I am your host,

Professor Albert Duhamel.

Audentes fortuna iuvat.

- And we're out.

- And we're out.

Um, sorry, folks.

Don't mean to interrupt.

Albert, looking good up there.

Where's Morash?

I went over to "The French Chef"

to find you.

Love the set, by the way.

It'll be beautiful.

Well, I have to be here

for tapings.

Oh, no. No.

No, no, no, you don't.

I want to get Julia moving.

I don't need you here.

This show can run itself.

What did you just say?

It's a figure of speech, Albert.

But I'm confident

the legs over here are strong.

Well, you can't take Russ.

I'm sorry to spring this

on everyone,

but this is where we are.

Russ, you're with Julia.

Albert, uh, you'll get Richard

as your new producer.

Well, who in holy Christmas

is Richard?

He can't be my producer.

He's right. I can't.

I don't read.

Alright, uh, well

Alice?

Hm?

Do you read?

W-Wonderful. Uh, you can stay

and assist these fine gentlemen.

Hunter, we should

talk more about this.

Mm, my circus, my clowns.

Thanks for being

accommodating, folks.

Can't wait to see

what we come up with.

I will not be upstaged

by a quiche.

Uh, well, we won't

let that happen, Albert.

You think you have what it takes

to be my producer?

I will certainly try.

Splendid.

Get me Nabokov.

Roland: Yeah, Alice.

Get him Nabokov.

Who's Nabokov?

Sweetie.

Sweetie, don't be scared.

It's me. I'm using my key.

Mom, what are you doing here?

That key is

for emergencies only.

Now, I know you told me

you were busy tonight.

But there was a sale

at Filene's

That's an emergency

And I couldn't not

pick you up some bras,

because that one I saw

underneath your blouse

last week was so dingy.

Thank you.

And I can't have my child

in the streets looking raggedy.

And I also brought you

some leftovers.

And on my way here,

I ran into Henry Jones.

Hmm. Who is so nice. Hmm.

Who is so nice.

But did you know he sweats

out the top of his head

when he eats spicy food?

I don't need dinner.

I cooked.

Excuse me.

These hands made that quiche

from scratch.

Oh, someone thinks

she's doing something!

Can you make another one for the

church's toy drive on Sunday?

I can't Sunday. I have to work. Alice.

I can't Sunday. I have to work. Alice.

When Philip is at the office

all night,

you don't give him a hard time.

When Fred and Sam are busy,

you don't say boo to them.

That's because they're married.

I don't have to worry

about them.

You don't have to worry

about me.

Oh, yes, I do.

Have you been dating? No, Mom.

Have you been dating? No, Mom.

I've been reading.

Well, being up to your eyebrows

in Norman Mailer

is no way to spend your youth.

Okay.

That's all I'm gonna say.

No, it's not.

You need to be ready

and available for opportunities.

The Lord can't find

a parked car.

What does that even mean?

Excuse me. Steer.

I meant the Lord can't steer

a parked car.

You have to have

a full tank of gas

and be in drive,

ready for action.

Join Dottie's bowling team

with me.

Mom, I am trying to work on

some important things right now,

and it doesn't make me feel good

when you say

that my life is meaningless

just because I'm single.

Ah, ah, uh, okay.

Okay.

Oh, uh, come on.

Honey.

I just

want you happy, tootsie.

Is there anything

Daddy and I can do

to help with the workload?

That depends. Do either of you

know Philip Roth?

No. But I do know Harold Roth

from the pharmacy,

and his son

just got back from Brown,

and Harold said he'd love

to make an introduction.

Unbelievable.

Oh, come on.

Sauté the bacon in oil.

- Julia.

- Julia.

Dry the beef in paper towels.

Sweetheart.

Oh, I'm sorry.

My head's a scrambled egg.

Russ is He's a tough teacher,

I'm realizing.

Mm.

Um, you know how we say,

"He who loves the rose

must respect the thorn"?

Mm.

I think I have

the best possible news

at the worst possible time.

I got a call from, uh, Antoine?

You know him?

His His gallery's underneath

my my judo dojo?

Yes, okay.

Well, it looks like

one of his artists

fell through

for an upcoming show.

Oh, Paul.

And he wondered

if I might want

to have a showing of my work.

Oh, my goodness!

I know.

It's It's terrible timing

with your show getting started,

and I worry I-I'd be leaving

when you're underwater

with all this work and and

your silly cooking classes

Oh, don't be a lunatic.

This is wonderful news.

Are you sure?

I If I did do it, I promise

I-I wouldn't take my eye

off the ball with you.

Paul, your art must be

your priority now.

Okay.

You can call that Antoine

and tell him oui.

A thousand times oui.

Okay.

Oh.

Oh, Pop, I'm sorry.

Did I wake you?

No, no.

I haven't been sleeping

so well lately.

"A difference

between"

"In your mouth."

"In your mouth."

"Of the oven."

Mm.

Here's to those

who wish us well.

And those who don't

can go to hell.

Ahh.

So this is the TV show?

Yeah, hopefully.

Making a single episode

is one thing,

but an entire season?

I feel like I don't know

what the heck I'm doing.

Well, never mind with all

that head-clutching nonsense.

You put one foot

in front of the other.

How did you grandfather open

his first bank in Illinois?

Brick by brick.

And how did I build

the ranch house in Montecito?

Board by board.

Alright, then.

There you go.

Cup by cup, Julia.

Hm.

What the hell is that word?

Boeuf.

Boeuf.

It means beef.

Well, why don't

they just say that?

But then first

I found myself wondering,

should we prepare

the bacon ahead of time?

Or since we have the sink,

should I simmer the rind

and bacon on-camera?

Oh! Heavens.

It works.

Indeed, it does.

So many details.

It's marvelous how

the pieces come together.

Makes me so excited

for what we can do,

and I can't wait to share my

little tricks and trade secrets.

And I was thinking,

I can show Americans

how to clean mushrooms,

which they don't know how to do.

And that would be good

in Episode 13,

when we do veal scallops

in mushroom sauce.

And this episode,

oh, Russ, you

Russ?

Yeah?

What is it?

I was just wondering

if you liked that idea.

Of me removing the bacon rind

before boiling the water?

Uh-huh.

- Well?

- Well?

I-I haven't heard

from anyone yet.

I thought you were my producer.

I am, Albert,

and I can call people,

but I can't make them

call me back.

And it might be

a little difficult

to secure an interview

with Nabokov

now that he's moved

to Switzerland.

Have you seen Julia's set?

With that sink?

I could get you

some more f-ferns.

She gets running water,

and I'm stuck with Roland!

There's nothing behind the eyes.

Well, you still have me.

Unbelievable.

Bobby Odell's directing a play.

Oh, gosh.

I haven't heard that name

in a long time.

Yeah.

What's the play?

It doesn't matter.

He's a hack.

Bobby was, what,

three years below me at B.U.?

And now he's doing

all this work?

It's a sign.

It has to be.

I need to quit my job.

Oh. I see.

Because here's the thing,

honey

I'm dying at the station.

I can't get anything I want

off the ground.

And I know being an artist,

truly pursuing it,

is a sacrifice,

but this is the time

to give directing a real shot,

because otherwise, Julia?

This can't be my life.

I need more.

Good.

I-I have more for you.

I'm pregnant.

Dr. Jenkins called

this afternoon.

I know that work is hard,

but, I don't know,

maybe it'll be easier when

you have a little bundle of joy

to come home to, crying

and screaming and pooping

and keeping you up all night.

We're having a baby?

Yeah. We are.

So can you hang in there?

And, I don't know,

maybe give me a hug?

Come here. Come here.

Of course. Come here.

Come here.

Come here. Of course.

Of course.

Mm!

Thank you.

Well, you're going to heaven.

When my father stayed with us,

I went right out

of my f*cking mind.

Oh, Dad likes you. Oh.

Oh, Dad likes you. Oh.

Wanted you to come to lunch

with us today.

I was grocery shopping

with Dorothy.

You're all set with

boeuf bourguignon for this week

and for class on Sunday.

Oh, great.

Uh-huh.

Your troops are on it.

Yes, well, your general is not.

Oh, Avis, I don't know

if I can do all this.

You can.

Your next script's not due

until Monday.

When do I write it?

Saturday.

Well, when do I sleep?

Oh. Well,

at least you don't have Paul

underfoot this weekend.

How are he and Antoine

getting along?

Oh, Avis DeVoto!

Antoine Lawrence

is a very old friend

with very good taste

who owes me a favor.

Oh, my goodness.

I'm a terrible person.

First lying to my husband

about my show

and then lying to him again

about his show.

Oh

Don't pick that up.

And don't beat yourself up.

Antoine loved Paul's work.

He was happy

to give him a chance.

You see, I want

to do all this, I do,

but I may be at the end

of my rope.

And the teaching

is just too much.

And there's a limit to what

I can ask of you and Dorothy.

We're happy to do it.

But Dorothy needs a babysitter.

I feel like

I'm taking advantage.

And Antoine, good taste

notwithstanding,

I'm still lying to my husband.

Whether you tell Paul or not,

you still need the money,

and he's far too proud to let

you foot the bill yourself.

So in this case, my dear,

the truth will not set you free.

Are you sure?

My advice is, stop this

yakky yak and enjoy the ride.

And finish what's left

of your butter pecan.

Leave it to you to find

the one ice cream

actually made with butter.

And you're the one

eating rocky road,

which may be prescient.

Paulski,

can I borrow your brain

for just a moment

and ask for help?

What do you think

of these edits?

I need to get the changes

to Russ for the tech rehearsal.

Well, I'm all yours

if you'll help me figure out

how to arrange these pieces.

I'm trying to tell a story,

but I don't think

I've cracked it yet.

Oh.

Right-o.

Running water.

What the f*ck?

That's exactly what I said.

You two.

Ladies.

Sergeant Morash.

Sergeant Morash.

Alright, alright, alright.

Let's get started.

Okay, everybody.

First positions for rehearsal!

Let's get ready

to, uh, get ready.

Okay, Julia, let's start

with the pot on the burner

and take it off the heat,

remove the lid, give a taste,

and then put it in the top oven.

Jim, can you bring

your camera in here?

Avis and Dorothy, why don't we

keep you behind the counter

until she goes to the oven? Got it.

until she goes to the oven? Got it.

Julia.

I like those recipes

you submitted.

Oh, good.

A thought

Instead of structuring

the season like a meal,

appetizers followed

by entrees then desserts,

let's toggle between courses

so we don't have

five soup episodes in a row.

Oh, that's stupendous

thinking, Russ.

Avis, you have those onions?

Yes.

Peeled and unpeeled

and

cooked.

Great.

Now, Julia, I need you here

but looking into camera 2

as you cut through

the slices of beef.

And, Avis, you can trick out

the cooked onions

as the camera's tight on Julia.

Like magic.

Exactly.

So, I-I was thinking

What is it?

Which camera is which?

That was the problem I had

during the damned pilot.

Yes, it was,

so let's make this

a little more clear for you.

I stole these from the set

of "Karate Kats."

Maybe they'll help? Oh, yes!

Maybe they'll help? Oh, yes!

Friends!

Little friends to talk to.

This is Binky.

Binky.

He'll be your friend until

you go for that cutting board.

After that, you'll be

with Boochie.

Boochie. He'll be your main man Boochie.

He'll be your main man

until you start

on the mushrooms.

Oh, Russ, I have

so much to learn.

Yes, you do.

But that's what rehearsal's for.

Oh, holy Moses,

I'm going to get this.

Alright, folks, let's take it

from the top

and give it a go with food.

No, I Before

Before we begin,

I just want to thank you all

for taking this ride with me.

To have this opportunity

at my age is

Everyone's working so hard.

I can't believe how lucky I am.

I'm going to swing for the

fences on every single show,

and regardless of what happens,

at least there will always

be leftovers.

Yeah.

Albert: Alice! My fern!

May I?

Please.

Ah.

So that's how you paint

a pomegranate.

How much would someone pay

for something like that?

Well, I tend to

leave the business concerns

to other people.

Ah.

The art and the expression,

they're the

They're what get my attention.

I got to tell you, Paul, words

like "art" and "expression"

send me right to the crapper.

It's funny. I didn't think

you could turn a hobby

into a career at your age.

But then, what do I know?

I didn't get into it

for the money.

Of course you didn't.

Well, I suppose every man

must have his arena.

Evidently, this is yours.

Is there anything else

I can help you with, John?

Uh, no. No,

I'm driving into Boston

to meet with an associate.

I should get moving. Take me

five hours to find parking.

I know what you're thinking.

I know what you mean,

and it's not true.

What am I thinking, Paul?

That I married Julia

for her money.

Why else?

How sad that you can't see

what I see.

Well?

Julia, it looks wonderful.

Oh, Alice, come see.

It works!

Oh, I've heard all about

the running water from Albert.

Oh, is that where you've been.

With Duke?

I've missed you.

We've all missed you.

Paul was ready to send out

the search brigade.

I was pulled off your show.

Yes, I know.

I heard.

I have found that I've had

the most success

when I've figured out

how to make myself

absolutely necessary

and indispensable.

For such a talent as you,

dear Alice,

I can't imagine that being

too difficult.

Oh.

Ham and pickle,

no crust, no mustard.

Thank you, dear.

You okay, Big John?

Oh, yeah. I'm fine.

Um, I was gonna drop this

in the mail,

but, uh, now I can save

a stamp this month.

Well, thanks, Pop.

You sure you can't stay?

You'd get to watch the show

being taped.

You'd be my very first

live audience.

No, I'm sorry.

I really need to get down

to my meetings in New York.

Business is business.

Well, you should know

all about that by now,

what with everything

you've got on your plate.

Yes, I feel like you and Gramps,

taking big risks and

this leap of faith.

You're your

father's daughter now, are you?

I am.

Let's not let another year

go by.

I'm going to be sad when you go.

It's been such a nice visit.

It certainly was.

Phila and I will look forward

to your next trip out west.

And if you wanted to come alone,

that would be even better.

Dad?

Yeah?

Oh, it's nothing.

Can I give you a hand?

I'm alright.

Why won't you let me help you?

We're all here to help.

Julia.

Be a lady?

Be a lady.

I am a lady, Dad.

Just not your type.

And that's okay.

You always gave me

everything I needed,

and I love you for that.

Well, good.

And I need one more thing.

Like Jayne Mansfield.

Oh!

Isn't she a Playboy bunny?

It's never too late, love.

I agree. Beautiful.

Thank you.

Maybe on Sunday

we can celebrate

with some champagne on the pier.

We have class on Sunday.

No, we don't.

I've found a way

to cover expenses for the show.

And I'm paying for a babysitter.

Oh, I couldn't.

Oh, you can, and you shall.

WoJulia, we need you.

Alright, crazy kids,

let's give this a try!

Everybody in positions, please.

One moment, please.

Very nervous.

Don't be nervous, darling,

whatever happens.

Thank you.

Mm-hmm.

Here we go with Episode 1.

Talk to Binky. Talk to Binky.

Talk to Binky.

And quiet on set, please!

We're ready in 5, 4, 3

Welcome to "The French Chef."

Welcome to "The French Chef."

I'm Julia Child.

Things look swell,

things look great ♪

♪ Gonna have the whole world on a plate ♪

♪ Starting here, starting now ♪

♪ Honey, everything's

comin' up roses ♪

♪ Clear the decks, clear the tracks ♪

♪ We got nothing to do but relax ♪

♪ Blow a kiss, take a bow ♪

♪ Honey, everything's comin' up roses ♪

♪ Now's our inning ♪

♪ Stand the world on its ear ♪

♪ Set it spinning ♪

♪ That'll be just the beginning ♪

♪ Curtain up, light the lights ♪

♪ We got nothin' to hit but the heights ♪

♪ We'll be swell, we'll be great ♪

♪ I can tell, just you wait ♪

♪ That lucky star I talk about is due ♪

♪ Honey, everything's coming up roses ♪

♪ For me and for you ♪