01x06 - Dancing in the End Zone

[bunniefuu]

Spectators: [Cheering]

Woo! Woo! Woo!

[Whistle shrills]

Dixon, uh, you notice a problem here?

I'm glad you brought this up, Coach.

Somebody keeps painting
that out of bounds line

right where I need to step.

Who do we talk to about that?

Uh, look, Troy, now I know
you've only played two games

as wide receiver and you have
the potential to be great...

if you stay in bounds.

Now, look, we may have won this game,

but if you don't work on your balance,

we might lose the next.

Oh, yeah.

So? So what I trip once in a while.

It's just a side effect of my mad skills.

Michael Irvin had mad skills.

But he didn't have any "side effects."

Using my favorite player against me.

That's cold, Coach.

Do you know what's colder?

The bench.

Hey, I know it sounds crazy,

but do you know what would really help you

with your footwork and balance?

- What?
- Ballet lessons.

Boys: [Laughing]

Ballet? Are you trippin'?

No, but you are...

trippin' all over the field.

- Oh...
- Mm-hm.

That isn't even funny.

This may be the way to fix that.

Sometimes I help my mom
out at her dance studio.

You can take a beginner class.

Troy in a tutu.

Now that I'd like to see.

Make fun of my idea all you want.

But the truth is a lot of great athletes

use ballet to help their game.

Yeah, maybe, but no football player

would be caught dead in tights.

Hey, man, here's your sports stockings.

Thank you, Sawyer.

Psshht. Tights.

Yo, Troy, wake up.

Wake up, man.

Michael Irvin? Is that you?

Wow, you are not quick, kid.

Well...

actually, I am extremely quick.

Just have this little... [Clears throat]

side effect.

Yeah, you fall on your face.

That's why you need to take ballet, dude.

Do you wanna be a football legend like me?

You gotta get your "rond de jambe" on, son.

Now wake up so I can get
outta this froufrou tutu.

Whoa, where did that come from?

Don't ask me. It's your dream.

♪

♪ You won't find me in the bleachers ♪

♪ Yeah that girl is one of us ♪

♪ I'm made of spice and sugar ♪

♪ She's pretty...
she's pretty tough ♪

♪ Then add a little glitter ♪

♪ She off in a cloud of dust ♪

♪ And you get... you get... ♪

♪ A game changer, play maker ♪

♪ Take the ball She'll see ya later ♪

♪ I'm on a dreamlike, teamlike ♪

♪ Livin' like one of the boys ♪

♪ She got it goin',
goin', she got it goin' on ♪

♪ Play like Friday night ♪

♪ Kickin' like one of the boys ♪

♪ She got it goin',
goin', she got it goin' on ♪

♪ One of the boys ♪

[Piano accompaniment]

- Troy?
- Shhhh!

Don't say my name.

Call me by my alias...
Tito Moustache.

I can't believe you took my advice.

- This is so awesome, Toto.
- It's Tito!

Whatever. What made
you change your mind?

Well, this is gonna sound crazy,

but I had a dream where Michael Irvin

told me to take ballet.

It doesn't sound crazy.

Sometimes dreams help
us work out our problems.

So it wasn't really Michael Irvin

telling you to take ballet.

It was you telling you to take ballet.

Nah, I'm pretty sure
it was Michael Irvin.

I'm just glad you're actually
listening to one of my ideas.

Look, you just have to promise me

no one is gonna find out
about this ballet stuff.

I promise. I'm your QB
and you're my wide receiver.

That's a sacred bond.

Good because the rest
of the team looks up to me

and I don't wanna look stupid.

I look stupid!

Don't worry. It's what
everyone else is wearing, too.

Everyone else?

Yeah, it's a beginner class.

Hey. How're you doing, sweeties?

Move it, rookie.

♪

- Oh, no.
- This can't be happening.

Oh, um, Sophie, is there a problem?

Do you wanna talk about it...

perhaps over a pudding
cup or, I don't know,

a candlelit dinner?

Get away from me, tiny man.

I love our playful banter.

Shhh, stop talking.
We're watching "Baja Beach."

Where's Bella? Oh, she is missing this.

Who cares? It's just one
of them kissy girl dramas.

Oh, it is so much more than that.

Woman: Kiss me, Fernando.

- You were saying?
- Shhhh!

Man: Rosa, my love, I must leave.

A general belongs with his army.

Woman: If you go,

I swear I will marry your twin brother.

- No, Rosa!
- He's all wrong for you!

Correction... kissing
and lame.

Sophie & Pepper: Oh!

[Piano accompaniment]

That was really good.

You've made a lot of progress in a week.

You're starting to get it, Tater.

It's Tito.

And I am crushing it.

Hey, yo, Britney, check it.

Congratulations.

You're almost ready for
the seven-year-old class.

♪

Oh, and then Rosa told Fernando

she was going to marry his twin brother.

I can't even...

You have to watch with us tonight.

We're gonna drink velvet chai frappes

and glitter glow our faces.

I wish I could, but I have to cover for

my mom's ballet class again.

Um, Bella, don't freak out,

but Kyle the Smile just walked in.

Oh, boy.

Uh, we'll give you some privacy.

Wait. No. I'm not ready for this.

I don't know what to talk about.

What do I say?

Hey, Kyle.

Uh...

salt?

Oh, thanks. I like salt.

So, listen, I'm sorry
we never got to dance.

Yeah, me, too.

I was thinking maybe we could...

Hey, Mom, look. It's Tito
the terrible ballet boy.

Tito? [Laughing] What
kind of name is Tito?

And very far from my name.

You must be confused, little girl.

[Quietly] Go away, Britney.

- What's she talkin' about?
- I have no idea.

I'm sorry, I've gotta go.

Are you trying to put...

Kids and their crazy imaginations.

I blame television.
Let's go find your mommy.

This isn't over, Tito!

Wow, she really
seemed like she knew you.

I know. That's weird.
I'm offended. Let's go.

♪

Woman: Go away from me, Fernando.

I don't love you any more.

Man: This is confused
because I am not Fernando.

I am Juan, his twin brother.

What are you doin'?

Um, I was just lookin' for the, uh...

ice road monster truckers...

channel.

You're watchin' that kissy girl drama.

Okay, I was. But it's not just kissy.

It's got intrigue, plot twists,
and some very foxy ladies.

How could you ever get wrapped up
in some kinda of show like that?

- [Horse whinnying]

Hold your horses. Does
this take place on a ranch?

A ranch. A beach. A castle.

There's a general and his
twin brother, there's a goat,

a witch, and some crazy chick
named Rosa who has amnesia.

- [Horse whinnying]
- Quiet! The horses are back.

♪

What's taking Bella so long?

Probably some football thing.

Hey, have you tackled our missing Bella?

Rude, party of one. Your table is ready.

And, no. No, we have not.

Have you guys seen Troy?

No. Hm, that's weird.

You're really starting
to get that "rond de..."

[Clearing throat] Hey, guys.

Bella, there you are.

We've barely seen you this week.

Where have you been?

Oh, I've been, uh... helping Troy study.

Troy? Study? For what?

- Math.
- History.

Right, the history of math.

It's for smart people, so...

Anyway, gotta go.

Troy, is this a ballet shoe?

How would I know?

Oh, 'cause it fell out of your bag.

Oh, that's, uh, that's because...

It's mine.

What's your ballet
slipper doing in Troy's bag?

Uh, well...

Bella and I are dating!

♪

All: Dating?

Yeah, dating.

Those are the words that
just came outta my mouth.

For everyone to hear.

Uh, I'm just... pshooo!

This doesn't make any sense.

What happened to Kyle?

Kyle? Ha.

Oh, sure, he was smart and cute

and perfect in almost every way.

But now I'm into this guy.

Oh, the heart. It's so unpredictable.

I, for one, am fully on team Trella.

I can see that.

Troy is like a diamond in the rough.

Really rough.

More rough than diamond.

Like a rock you might find in the yard.

Hello! Hi.

I'm standing right here.

And I have plenty of good qualities.

Tell 'em, Snookums.

Oh, there'll be plenty
of time for that later...

Pooh-pants.

Oh, they have nicknames.

Yes, we do.

Some of which may be temporary.

Great idea. Why don't
we talk about them now?

Can you guys give us a little private time?

Of course, we can. Let's go.

- This is all so weird.
- And exciting.

Mostly weird.

Pshooo! Pshooo!

We're dating?

You couldn't come up with
something better than that?

What else was I supposed to do?

Let them find out I'm taking ballet?

Look, you heard the locker room
laugh when you brought it up.

Those are my friends.

I'll never be able to show
my face in school again.

But I like Kyle.

And I kinda think maybe
he might like me back.

You wanna risk my reputation
on kinda-maybe-might?

Come on, you promised.

Wide receiver. QB. Sacred bond.

All right, fine,

but you are so gonna owe me for this.

Me? This whole ballet
thing was your idea.

So, I mean, if there's blame to be placed,

I believe we both know where it belongs.

- Yes, we do.
- Ah! Hey!

How could this happen?

I'm the one who's supposed
to have a boyfriend first.

I already set my reminder
in my calendar for next year.

His name will be "Henry."

Forget your girly problems.

Our wide receiver is
dating our quarterback.

What if they have a fight
in the middle of the game...

or worse, they start kissin'?

That's gotta be at least a 15 yard penalty.

Do you think I'm happy about this?

I mean, Kyle I understood,
but what does she see in Troy?

Are you kidding? He's a handsome,
natural-born leader.

Just like Fernando.

Oh, come on, no one's like Fernando.

Pepper: [Gasping]

I mean... who's Fernando?

I don't know him or Rosa
Gomez Tavarez de la Vega.

Wait a minute! You've
been watching "Baja Beach."

Uh, h-he started it.

Please don't tell anyone.

That depends. Are you on
team Fernando or team Juan?

Fernando. Duh.

Juan is just so...

- Oh, I can't even...
- No.

All: [Chattering]

[Classical piano music]

Look at him. He is so in the zone.

Yeah, he must be listening
to some serious thrash metal.

- [Whistle shrills]
- Hail up, Bulldogs!

Teammates: [Hooting, cheering]

All right. Listen
up. Listen up, everyone.

All right, we're on a winning streak.

But the Bears are tough.

So everybody keep your head in the game.

And your feet in bounds.

Let's go get 'em, Bulldogs!

Teammates: [Woofing]

All right, Troy,

just trust what you've been
doing all week in the studio.

You've got this.

Bella: Deep fade on two. Ready?

Bulldogs: Break!

Spectators: [Cheering]

Bella: Down! Set! Hut!

[Classical music]

[Classical music continues]

[Classical music continues]

- [Whistle shrills]
- Spectators: [Cheering]

I just can't get over that game, Troy.

I've never seen you so light on your feet.

- And I think I know your secret.
- You do?

- You're dancing...
- Dude, I...

on the wings of love.

Love, yes! Ha. That's it.

Pepper: Don't freak out,
but Kyle just walked in.

Why would she freak out?

She's with the yard rock now.

Yeah, lucky me.

Kyle's heading this way.

Oooh, this should be "Baja Beach" good.

Or none of our business. Bye!

Hey, Bella, great game tonight.

Thanks.

Yeah, you and Troy were really in sync.

Guess it makes sense. I
hear you're a couple now.

Oh, right.

I can't believe my timing.
I was gonna ask you out.

You were? Uh, I mean...

you were?

Yeah, but, uh...

guess Troy beat me to it.

Anyway, I'm just glad you
found a guy you really like.

Well, like is a strong word. [Laughing]

I mean, we are in a relationship,

but let's just say the honeymoon's over.

Stay right here.

- Now, the thing is...
- We need to talk!

Really?

- So, we have to break up.
- What?

No, we can't.

My game is so much better with... ballet.

And you're my cover.

I was your cover.

Kyle just told me he wanted to ask me out.

Oh, that's so cool.

Y'all should totally do that...

at... at the end
of the season.

That's almost three months.

Ooh, you're right. We
might make the playoffs.

Then there's championship

and we'll have to defend our
title at the end of the season.

I'm thinking two years tops.

I'm not letting a fake relationship

get in the way of a real one.

Trust me... a fake
relationship with The Troy

is way better than a real
one with a kid who wore

a Batman cape for the entire summer.

He was seven. People change.

And it was adorable.

As adorable as this?

Oh, you leave me no choice.

Whoa, what are you doing?

Sorry Troy. It's over!

Uh, Bella, please, give me a chance.

I can change.

It's not you. It's me.

Well, then you can change.

We can change together, Bella, please.

Don't give up on us.

You're my bae.

Aw, Bella, he's on
his knees. Have a heart.

Look, I'm begging you.

What you and I are doing
is helping the team.

Look, if you won't do it for
me, do it for the Bulldogs.

Please, Bella, take me back.

- Take him back.
- Take him back.

[Chanting "Take him back!"]

Okay, fine.

All: [Cheering]

You won't regret this.

Stay right here. I'll get
you your favorite smoothie.

What's your favorite smoothie?

Never mind, I'll surprise you.

Oh, hey, Kyle.

Hey, man, that was intense.

Yeah, well, you do what
you gotta do for love.

Anyway, I'm just glad she's happy.

Yeah. Real happy.

♪

Hey, Dixon, great job last game.

Whatever you're doing is working.

The technique is called love.

Yeah. I really didn't need to know this.

Bella: [Sighing]

Troy: [Sighing]

Actually, it's not love.

You see, Bella and I aren't really dating.

- You're not?
- Troy, what are you doing?

I just made that up
to cover up the truth,

and the truth is Bella's
been teaching me ballet.

Wow. Thanks, Troy.

And I don't wanna hear
anyone laughing. Understand?

I don't wanna hear how ballet

makes him look like less of a man.

I don't want anyone calling
him nicknames like Tutu Troy,

Ballerina Boy. You hear me?

- It's not funny!
- Bella, no one's laughing!

Right. [Laughing]

Just makin' sure.

That was a gutsy thing to do.

I'm really proud of you, son.

And you've given me
the courage to confess

- Sawyer and my's darkest secret.
- No, no, no, no, no!

We watch "Baja Beach" and we love it.

We're "Baja Beach" dudes.

Okay, I appreciate
what you're doing, Newt.

But my secret was actually real.

No man would ever ever watch "Baja Beach."

Actually... - Yeah,
yeah, you're right.

Shhhh! We're just trying to, uh...

We're your bros!

We're still gonna watch
later this weekend, right?

Of course. Think I'd miss
the wedding of the century?

Sawyer & Newt: [Giggling]

Look, I'm sorry I dragged you into this.

And don't worry about Kyle.

I'll make sure he knows
this whole dating thing

was just pretend.

Thanks, Troy. That's really sweet.

And, I mean, he'll understand pretend.

The guy was Batman for a whole summer.

Don't you start.

What? What's that over Gotham?

It's the Kyle signal!

To the Batcave!

This is gonna hurt a lot
more than a ballet slipper!

[Piano accompaniment]

Sawyer: Ow. Okay. Okay.

Where's Bella? I thought
she was gonna teach us.

Oh, she texted me.

Apparently, she and Sophie
and Pepper are celebrating

her freedom from what she called

the nightmare relationship with Troy.

Again, I'm standing right here.

Yeah, anyway...

she said we'd have a sub.

[Gasping] You?

Me!

I hope you guys brought your pads

'cause I'm about to bring the hurt!

Plié and one and two and three and four...

♪