05x04 - Pregnant Paws

[bunniefuu]

Previously on Royal Pains...
Shelby Shackleford,

V.P. of Acquisitions
for Symphony Health.

We want to buy Hankmed.

This is a cease and desist order.

"The use of the home professional office"

"shall be prohibited."

- I'm gonna get even.
- Don't do it, Evan.

I'm gonna run for village council.

I cannot take this anymore!

I miss the old Jeremiah,

the one who was my friend.

I'm gonna have a baby.

You're gonna have a baby.

I share more than a surname with Boris.

You have the same genetic disease.

Hello, Hank.

My cousin and I were quite close
at one time, but he jumped

at the chance to hire Dima.

You've been spending a lot
of time here, haven't you?

Dima!

You stay here with me, okay?

You already d*ed. Now it's my turn.

Look... you still don't know
what Milos wants, right?

But maybe I can offer him
something he needs.

- Hank! Hey, let me help you.
- Shelby.

- Hi.
- Hey.

- Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.

What a surprise. Bear claw?

No, I'm a Southern girl.
I like 'em raised and glazed.

Huh. Okay.

So, I understand I'm on
your schedule later today

to discuss Divya and Jeremiah's
impressions of Savannah General?

Indeed you are.

Will we be discussing how much
they loved it?

You know, just so I can come prepared.

They called your hospital down there

nothing short of spectacular.

Ugh, I feel a "but" coming.

- But...
- Yep.

We've been dealing with quite
a few big changes lately.

I've been dealing with
a lot of change recently.

I just got back from Budapest,
I was meeting a new patient

there... who will require
a lot of my attention.

- So, that's a "no."
- No.

So, that's a "yes."

No, uh, I just need some more time.

I-I hope you understand.

Actually, I don't.

Anchoring yourself
to the stability of Symphony

while you go through these changes

seems like an ideal situation to me.

And, at some point, it may be,
but right now, I just...

I can't commit to anything new.
Well, we want to move fast

on incorporating concierge
medicine, with or without you.

And I would hate to be your competitor.

So, if you can't join them, crush them?

Oh, no pressure.

I'm sure it would be a while
before we crush you.

Hey. You're in the Hamptons?

Of course. Where do you want to meet?

Okay, I don't know that place.
What's the address?

Great. I'll see you in ten.

Marisa.

Hank.

It's good to see you.

It's good to see you, too.

- So.
- So.

How are you?

I'm... okay.

Boris isn't doing well either.

You know, I've known for a while now

that Boris's family
was dangerous, but...

to see Dmitri brutally m*rder*d
in the street?

I just... I can't imagine losing
a brother like that.

Or a patient.

Yeah.

Boris knows that, and he will
be forever grateful.

If you weren't in Budapest,

I think we both know
what could have happened.

- Well, I...
- And, that's one of the reasons

why I came here.

I wanted to thank you personally
for doing everything

you could do to save Dmitri's life.

And to keep Boris from making
any rash decisions.

I want to do more than that.

I want to help Boris see Milos
arrested and put away for good.

- There are risks.
- I know.

We're not only talking about
our medical licenses here.

I know.

If Milos finds out
the clinical trial is fake...

he could come after us.

Which is why you don't have to do this.

You don't have to risk your life
or your career.

Neither do you.

- He's my husband.
- He's my friend.

Despite everything,
he's still my friend.

And there's very little
I wouldn't do for him.

I'm in, Marisa.

Me too.

So, after an unfortunate 72-hour hiccup,

brought to us by the iron-fisted
rule of Blythe freakin' Ballard

over the village council,

Hankmed is back.

But, we still can't see patients here,

which is actually the perfect segue

for me to tell you all
something very important.

I'm running for village council.

Good luck, Evan.

Thank you, Jeremiah.

Thank all of you.

Uh, okay! Let's do this.

Hank, you are meeting
with Shelby later today.

Actually, I ran into her.

She said if we can't make up our
minds, Symphony might move on.

Yeah, that's a negotiating tactic.

She wants us, bad. We're fine.

Okay.

So, I think that's all the new business.

Actually, no, Divya.

Paige has something
that she would like to say.

I have an appointment today.

An interview, actually.
For an incredibly

prestigious internship
with Russell Berger,

the number one specialist
at Sutton and Chesterfield's.

Oh, he's probably interviewing


and there's no way he's gonna
hire a first-year student,

but still, I gotta go... mwah...
and not get it.

So, bye!

- Good luck, babe.
- Go get 'em, Paige!

So, if there's nothing else...

Hank! We haven't heard
your Budapest report yet.

How was your trip?

Did you bring home
any pictures or souvenirs?

Goulash recipes?

I met Boris's cousin, Milos.

He may become a patient.

That's it?

That's it.

Okay.

All right, good. That about does it.

Meeting... adjourned.

Thanks, guys.

Wait, Divya is trying
to tell you she's pregnant.

Whoops.

I guess this is what they mean
by a pregnant pause.

- Oh, my...
- Congratulations!

That's... so exciting!

Sorry.

Yeah.

Oh! Okay, you're choking me.

- Oh! I'm so happy for you.
- Oh, sorry. Sorry. Sorry.

Yeah, I...

I don't know where to start.

Except to say, possibly
we should discuss this later.

Oh, boy.

- You okay?
- How did this happen?

Well, when a boy and a girl
have unprotected...

No, don't... wha...

How could Divya tell Jeremiah before me?

I thought we were family, Henry.
I thought...

we were talking about Divya.

We are... we're talking
about Divya, okay?

Who's always been there for Divya?

- Me!
- Oh.

That's who, me.

When she broke off
her arranged marriage, me.

When her family disowned her, me.

When she was in financial
trouble, I was right there!

I'm like her best friend/
brother/father figure.

And she goes and she tells Jeremiah?

Evan.

Divya is going through
a huge change in her life.

I mean, you saw her.

She was completely off-balance,
just left.

Listen, we cannot freak out on her.

And we can't freak her out.

You're right.

Totally, you're absolutely right.

It just doesn't make any sense.
Jeremiah? Really?

Okay, maybe while you're still
wrapping your head around this,

you should just give her
some room to breathe.

I'm just not ready to have a baby.

Get it. Oh!

Good boy!

- That's good.
- Maya?

Hi, hunter. Oh, hi.

I'm Divya from Hankmed.

Oh, hey, just give me one second.

Go on, get it.

Oh, hey, George!

Hi! George, sit.

Oh! What a good listener!

You're getting so good at that.

Hank.

What are you doing here?

Oh, you know, I was in the neighborhood.

Thought you might need a hand.

- With a dog bite?
- Yeah, sure.

Okay.

Well, you guys brought a lot
of manpower for a little nip.

Uh, let's take a look, shall we?

Oh, yeah.

Oh, wow. That's gotten a lot worse.

Maya, the dog that bit you,

can we see the vaccination record?

I don't have it.

Nobody does.

It was a stray.

When it got a little red,
I called the dog's owners,

but they were out of town with the dog.

Their housekeeper said they
found him on the road last week.

Do you think it's rabies?

The odds of rabies are very slim.

This happened three days ago?

I know, I should have called
you guys earlier,

but I always get a little scratched up

playing with the dogs.

Well, Maya, this is more than
a little scratch.

And so are those scars.

- Occupational hazard.
- Yep.

This is quite a place.
Looks like a lot of work.

I have part-time help, but these guys,

they need full-time love
and attention, you know?

- Right.
- Oh, there's Bono.

Hank, say hello to Bono.

What's up, Bono. Give me five.

- He gave me five!
- Good boy.

Very impressive, Maya.
Good boy.



I have a fever?

Your wound looks like a simple
bacterial infection,

and that can produce a temperature,

so we'll give you some augmentin
to help.

And take blood and saliva samples,

make sure there's nothing we're missing,

and give you a rabies sh*t.

Just to be on the safe side.

Okay.

Look, I know, you're right.
I totally understand,

- Paige... Paige...
- But listen, Evan... Evan...

Evan, Evan, I gotta go.

I know you're freaking out about Divya,

but I'm freaking out about
this interview,

and we can't both be freaking
out at the same time.

So, could you just put
your freak out on pause?

- Okay, yeah.
- Okay, thank you.

- Okay, I love you. Bye.
- I love you, too. Bye.

Hi, Mr. Berger. I'm Paige Lawson.

You're early.

That's just as much of
an inconvenience as being late.

Oh.

Okay. Uh, well, let me begin by saying

it is an absolute honor

to finally meet you in person,
Mr. Berger.

It's pronounced "Bear-jhay."

B-e-r-g-e-r, Bear-jhay.

Of course.
I'm very sorry, Mr. Bear-jhay.

You have a, um, a lovely home.

I do, but this isn't it.

This is a client's home that
I'm cataloguing for auction.

They're renovating in the hopes
of selling it.

Financial times being
what they are and all.

Yes.

All right, let's get started.

Hank, what are you really doing here?

I just want to be here
for you, you know?

In case you need anything.

That's very sweet, but I am all set.

I'm sure you are,
but there are a lot of things

you may not have considered.

Like, I know it's gonna be tough
for you to tell Rafa.

Wait, it is Rafa's?

Yes, Hank, Rafa is the father.

Of course he is.

Well, I think the sooner you tell him,

the better you'll feel.

We could do it together.

I mean, you'll do it,
but I can stand next to you.

Thank you.
I've already spoken with Rafa.

- Oh.
- And I made it clear

that I have no expectations of him.

We have a lot of details to work out...

finances, visitations...
though, given his schedule,

he won't be around much and frankly,

I am relieved about that.

Got it. Good.

- Great.
- Now we should think about

how to tell your family.

For now, I'm not telling them
or anyone else

until the end of my first trimester.

And that was gonna be
my next piece of advice.

Then we are totally in sync. Bye!

Youuh... o... yeah. Okay.

All right, don't forget
to join us today,

Kiki and G, for our annual

wet and wild "life's a beach" party,

with very special guest,
radio host and fellow loudmouth,

Craig Carton.

Dude, you sound like Demi Moore

when she used to smoke a pack a day.

That's because I lost my voice
while yelling at you.

Folks, in case you missed it,

yesterday G got stuck in the elevator,

and I had an intern flood it
with packing peanuts,

and then...

Help me! I can't breathe!

Okay, I have had issues
with confined spaces ever since

you locked me in the trunk
of your car junior year.

Uh, yes, claustrophobia is
a legitimate anxiety disorder.

It can lead to serious panic att*cks.

- Huh.
- Uh, who the hell are you?

Dr. Jeremiah Sacani.

I called him.

Oh, a doctor who does house calls?

And he's got that sexy physician
thing going on, too.

- It's hot!
- No, bad Kiki, bad Kiki.

He's a real doctor.

All right, we're gonna break
for our sponsors.

Hey, we'll be right back with more

on Kiki and G's A.M. eargasm.

Hey, I'm Garrett.
My throat really does hurt,

and a DJ losing his voice
is not good radio.

Oh, all right. Let's get started.

All right.

- Hey.
- Hi!

I got your "911" text. What's wrong?

Sit. Sit, please.

Nothing's wrong, okay?

At all, nothing.

There is nothing for you
to freak out about, Divya.

- Why would I freak out?
- You wouldn't.

Okay, so, I called you here today

because I've been thinking a lot,

and my life has been so full lately,

with getting married,
and moving into Shadow Pond,

and Blythe Ballard, that I think

I forgot to water the delicate
flower that is Divya,

and that Divya flower felt neglected.

Okay, you're freaking Divya out.

Okay, Divya, we need to reconnect.

We are connected, okay?
But I'm really busy.

I checked your schedule.
You have this hour free,

so talk to me.

Talk to me.

Okay, what do you want to talk about?

About you.
Come on, about what's going on.

All right, I'll start. I'll start.

I read that pregnant women's
feet swell up like balloons.

So, have you thought about
what you're gonna do

with all your expensive shoes yet?

Why, would you like to stick your foot

in your mouth stylishly?

You see? Classic Divya/Evan.

We're connecting.

- This is what it's about.
- Yep.

Why don't we talk about

how big you're gonna get?
Like, ba-ba-bah-bum.

- It's gonna be hilarious.
- Stop talking.

Oh, if you're nervous about
the delivery at all,

we can talk about that, too.
Because I saw a video,

and it... it looks very painful.

More painful than this?

Than... oh.

Okay, I've got to take this now.

- Okay.
- Look, can we continue

this conversation never?

We can start a new conversation.

You have got to fix him
by this afternoon.

Craig Carton is our marquee guest.

Boomer and Carton?

Well, they're huge, which is why
I'm trying so hard

to put some fun back into our show.

Okay, we've moved on,
and our show is plenty of fun.

Says the man enjoying
a spot of tea.

Oh, Garrett, may I take a look?

Yeah, it's just Earl Grey.

This could be our one chance with Craig.

Who does sports?

And stunts, on the radio?

And he reached number one
in the arbitron ratings.

He can help us get to the next level.

If Craig wants to help us,
he's gotta like us for us.

And, we're back!

What's the verdict on G, Dr. Feelgood?

Uh, he has acute laryngitis.

I would rest your vocal cords
until the afternoon show,

stick with the tea, and gargle
with warm salt water.

So, can I just leave?

Hey.

- Didn't you get my message?
- I did, but I can handle it.

Being pregnant doesn't mean
I can't do my job.

Yeah, I know that, but I don't
want you to be exposed

to something that would be
dangerous for your pregnancy.

Oh, like what?

Well, Maya's symptoms line up
with toxoplasmosis.

This is called "The Pampered Pooch."

She boards dogs, not cats.

Maybe she boards both.

If she does, your health
could be at risk.

Okay, how about this?

I promise not to crawl into
a litter box.

- Okay.
- Hey.

- Thanks for coming so quickly.
- Absolutely.

If those oral antibiotics
aren't working,

we need to take a closer look.

Maya, do you board cats here?

No, we only cater to dogs.

Huh.

- Call me if you need any help.
- Yeah.

- So, what's going on?
- Well, my fever is up to 102,

and I have a headache,
and my neck is really stiff.

Does that sound like rabies?

They're much more likely
symptoms of meningitis.

That doesn't sound much better.

You'll need a spinal tap.

Hank!

I need your help.

Oh, oh. That's significant pressure.

Tube.

Significant how?

Well, the tap seems clear,
but there's a buildup of fluid.

We're gonna need to get
a C.T. scan of your head.

My head? Why?

We need to see what's causing
the extra spinal fluid pressure.

There you go.

But we're gonna be with you
the whole time.

What is your experience with



Uh, I... I took a class.

Um, it was on my resume.

- Second semester I...
- Fine.

Catalog this room and find me
when you're done.

Um, do you want me to divide
northern European from Southern?

Only if you want to do it correctly.

Okay, got it. Thank you.

- Okay, it looks clear.
- Great.

I'll go tell Maya.

Eh, bup, bup... radiation.

Honest to God, Hank, the machine is off.

Stop worrying. I'm okay.

Okay. Don't work too late.

Oh!

I thought you might be finished in here.

I just wanted to show someone
our new equipment.

Hey, guys.

Of course, you two know Dr. Van d*ke.

- Of course we do.
- Hank.

Good to see you, Paul.

- Paul.
- Divya.

I thought that you had moved
down to Miami

when the E.R. shut down.

I did, but I got a call from Shelby

telling me that Symphony
was now in charge,

and there were big changes
on the horizon.

I told Paul about our plans to start

a concierge business here,

and he jumped at the chance to visit.

- Hmm.
- She sent a private jet.

- Mm.
- Who says no to that?

- Right.
- Why don't I show you

- our new doctors' lounge.
- Great.

Guys, say hello to everyone
at home for me.

Will do.

Thanks again for squeezing us through.

Happy to help.

Dr. Feelgood, you're back.

Oh, it's Sacani.

Garrett texted me. Is he around?

Oh, yeah, he's taking a nap
before the beach party, so...

I would just like to do
a quick checkup before you go.

Garrett?

Garrett.

I just wan...

Hey, Dr. Sacani, you came.

Uh, you have something on your face.

Seriously?

How are you doing?

Oh, a little weak and dizzy.

I'd like to retake your temperature

and check your blood pressure.

G, remember in college
when I passed out drunk

at Burner Bailey's party?

You drew a giant snake
on my face, with a sharpie.

And you retaliated with
a facial drawing of your own.

More lewd than a snake, if I recall.

You two met in college?

We started a show together
at the college station.

Most popular show on campus.

And it's because we played pranks.

People did love us.

So now, you do me.

We'll both look ridiculous for Craig.

We don't need to look ridiculous.

All right, the material
we're doing right now

is strong enough on its own.

We need to maintain some integrity.

Oh, come on, don't take it off.
It's funny.

That's fine.

I already tweeted it.

Boom.

"Bring all your friends to Kiki and 'G's"

"life's a beach party."

"It'll be a drag without you."

Doc, isn't it funny?

Oh, sorry. Comedy isn't my field.

Forget it.

- Whoa! Um...
- Oh, sorry about that.

Evan.

What are you doing here?

Well, when a woman is pregnant,

she is going to have a...

I'll tell you what she's gonna have.

She's gonna have a fit
when you buy her all this stuff.

What... you cannot give
this cream to Divya.

Of course I can. Every woman needs it.

It says so right here. It's for...

Oh, my God.

- Okay, a pee-pee teepee?
- Yes.

- A pee-pee teepee?
- A pee-pee teepee.

You don't know that she's having a boy.

- Girls pee-pee too.
- Not in a teepee.

- What?
- I told you not to freak out,

and yet here you are
in this baby store with...

with a carriage full of freak out.

This is gonna overwhelm her.

You always overreact
when there are big changes,

since you were a kid. It's what you do.

Don't go there, okay? I'm not ten.

You can't just send me out to play.

Okay, shh. We're in a baby store.

- Oh, thank you very much.
- I'm sorry.

But Evan, this is Divya. Our Divya.

And this baby, this life,

it's... it's all so much bigger than us.

We have to make them both
feel safe and protected.

I understand that. I do, all right?

At least, I'm trying to understand it.

Okay, okay. Then try to understand that

this is not what Divya needs.

All right.

What does she need?

I have no idea.

Hey, Paul, how was your tour
of the hospital?

- Uh, impressive.
- Hmm.

Had I known six months ago

Symphony was gonna rescue this place,

I never would have bailed to Miami.

Ah, yes, Miami must be
torturous for you,

what with year-round sunshine

and all those models on South Beach.

Okay, you're right. It's pretty great.

But now, opportunity is knocking here.

Hey, I've got some time before golf.

You want to grab a bite?

No, thank you. I am swamped.

I mean, this whole summer
has been crazy.

Crazy good, or just crazy crazy?

- Crazy... different.
- All right.

Well, whatever is going on,
it's working for you.

You look great.

You're practically glowing.
And I'm not just saying that

so you'll say I look great, too,

'cause I'm comfortable with how I look.

You look great, too.

Is it my hair?
'Cause I got a new shampoo...

- Okay, I have to go.
- No, wait, wait, wait.

How about after golf?
A girl's gotta eat.

- No, thank you.
- Appletinis by the pool?

Oh, probably not a good idea.

Come on, what's your excuse? Boyfriend?

Pregnant.

Okay.
Okay.

Look, if you don't want
to go out with me,

a simple "no" would do the trick.

Pregnant? Wow, that is a good one.

I gotta say, I like the new you.

You're more relaxed, less uptight.

I'll see you around.

Your scan was clear, but your
temperature is still elevated,

so we'd like to put you on some
broad-spectrum antibiotics

which are more powerful than the
earlier medications we gave you.

Can I take those at home?

I really need to get back
to running the pooch.

The antibiotics have to be
administered intravenously,

and they can keep a close eye
on you here

while we're waiting
for your blood cultures

and your I.P. test results.

All the tests you've run
so far have come back negative.

What about the rabies test?

That takes a little longer,
but honestly,

we are not headed there yet.

"Yet."

Rabies is always fatal, right?

And you can't stop it.
I read that online.

So, if this is it, I don't want
to be stuck here.

I want to be home with my dogs.

Maya, the odds that
it's rabies are quite small.

Somebody has to be that odd statistic!

I know that you're frightened,

and I know that you want
to get back to business...

It's not just about business.

Look, I know it seems like
I'm going off the deep end here,

but ever since I was little,

the only thing that's helped
when I'm scared is my dogs.

They're more than just my livelihood.

When I'm with them, I feel safe.

I feel the same way about my job.

But you're not going to be able
to take care of your dogs,

if you don't take care of yourself.

Hey, Evan, it's me.
Sorry I couldn't talk earlier.

This job interview has turned out to be

a lot more job than interview.
Okay, what's up?

But don't worry, I am still
on top of everything.

You know, that would be a lot funnier

if you could actually see me right now.

Well, I can see you now,

and I'm not amused in the least.

- This is not our home.
- Paige? Paige?

We do not make ourselves comfortable

under a Louis-quinze desk.

Ow.

All right!

And we're back

at the life's a beach party for K.I.Y.Z.

- With Kiki, uh-oh!
- And G-G-G-G! G.

And a very special guest today.

Wow. Oh, my God.

The one, the only...

Craig Carton!

Are you guys all right?

- I don't know, Craig.
- Wow!

I just want to say,
you're one attractive gentleman.

Your skin looks so smooth.

- Yeah, he is.
- Hang on one second.

Listen, I'll talk football
with you guys,

but we're not talking facials.

I'm serious, man.

You're... you're hot.

I would totally make out with you.

And we're definitely not going there,

- so back off.
- Okay.

We'll see about that.

- V.D.!
- Hey!

Hey, I heard you were back in town.

Yep, and happy to be.
Man, did I miss the Hamptons.

Yeah, we missed you, too.

Uh, let's just cut to the chase.

Did Shelby offer you the concierge job?

Uh, not yet.
She wanted to show me around,

get my thoughts first.
We're meeting again tomorrow.

Hey, I'm curious.

Why did you guys pass
on this Symphony deal?

Did you hear something dicey about them?

No, they check out very well.

And so do I, thanks to you.

Pretty sure the only reason
she called is 'cause

I used to work for Hankmed.

- Well.
- Man, if I move back,

we gotta hang out.

Appletinis, okay? My place.

See you, Paul.

You told Shelby it was a pass?

No, I said it was a "not now."

You're the one who said her moving on

was just a negotiating tactic.

No... now Van d*ke is here!

- All right, easy.
- Well, are you ready to just

lose this opportunity, then,

along with some of our business, too?

I'll call her. I will call her.

Well, good. Just come up with something

- better to say than "not now."
- Okay.

I have to admit, I'm rather
flummoxed by my patient.

- Which one?
- It's one of the DJs.

He presented with acute laryngitis.

He complained of dizziness and weakness,

and now he's exhibiting

- bizarre and erratic behavior.
- Yeah.

I used to listen to Kiki and G.

That's their thing.
That's like their trademark.

If anyone knows bizarre
and erratic behavior,

- it's this guy.
- Eh.

- Hey, what's up?
- Just checking up on a patient.

Uh, should we move into the shade?

It's a little bright... what?
Would you stop treating her

like candy glass?

She's pregnant, she's not
perishable, all right?

I got your back, Divs.

I don't need you to have my back,

or any other part of me.

- See?
- And I don't need any shade.

- Oh.
- Nyah.

- Nyah nyah nyah.
- Excuse me.

Well, this is not getting better.

Listen, trust your instincts.
Keep an eye on him.

If you still think there's
a neuro problem,

take him in for an MRI.

Okay, that was the hospital.

Maya's saliva tested negative
for rabies.

- That's great news.
- Yes.

But she checked herself out A.M.A.

before the test results came back,

and now no one can reach her.

I'm gonna go to the Pampered Pooch.

- Yep.
- And no help is necessary.

- Okay, but I...
- Stay!

Good boy.

I'm supporting you from right here!

I was just trying to help.

She doesn't want help.
She says she wants space.

When did she say that?

When I asked her.

You asked her?

Huh.

Maya!

- Is anyone here?
- Divya, is that you?

- Maya.
- Divya, I can't see you.

I can't see anything!

How are you so sure it's not rabies?

I... I'm blind. I don't want to die.

Try not to panic.
It is definitely not rabies.

All of your tests came back normal.

I promise you, were going to get
to the bottom of this.

Okay, here's Hank.

Hey!

Maya, we need to take you
to the hospital.

- Come.
- But what about my dogs?

Uh, I'll cover for you until
your assistant arrives.

Okay, right this way.

I'm just opening the door.

Okay, okay, now...

Putting you in the passenger seat.

That's it. Okay.

Thank you for coming so quickly.

Of course.

Maya! You're not gonna believe it.

- Ruby needs you.
- Maya has another appointment.

Well, Ruby got skunked, again.

You think she would have
learned her lesson

after she cornered one two weeks ago.

Abyssinians are famous for their beauty,

- not their smarts.
- Abyssinians.

Hank, stop! I'll be right back.

Maya, I thought you said
you didn't board cats?

- I don't.
- Well, what about Ruby?

- My neighbor's cat?
- Yes.

I washed her once.

Maya, did Ruby scratch you?

Have you ever tried to wash a cat?

Escalating fever, headaches,
loss of vision.

- Everything lines up.
- You're right.

Maya, I need to do a quick exam.

Turn towards me, please.

Raise your arms, please.

Yep, swollen lymph nodes.

What's going on?

If we're right, you're
suffering from an infection

caused by the bartonella bacteria,

commonly known as cat scratch fever.

A scratch from a cat did all this?

Yes, but we can start you on
a cycle of rifampin,

to fight the infection, and prednisone,

to relieve the swelling
and to restore your vision.

You're going to be all right, Maya.

G, are you okay?

That's definitely an altered
neurological state.

G. G, I need to look at you.

We're having fun up there.

I just gotta keep my throat oiled.

No, no, no.
That's the last thing he needs.

Pulse is 30. That's dangerously low.

I would like to have you lo... oh!

Oh, my... what? What, oh, my God.

What... what... what is happening?
What is happening?

- He's not breathing.
- What? What?

G, hey.

Wake up, okay.

- Evan, come here, please.
- Yep.

- Okay, thanks.
- Oh, no, no, no.

I can't believe this.

Keep pumping, slow and steady,
every five to six seconds.

- Got it.
- What is happening?

What is happening?

His pulse is weak and thready.
He's bradycardic.

I have to get his heart sped up.
Will you call 911?

Already done.

- God, oh, my God.
- Oh, my God.

Okay, okay, G, G.

Okay, pulse is coming back up.
You can stop.

G? G, just lie still.

The ambulance is on its way.

G, I am so sorry. G, I am so, so sorry.

That's okay. You didn't do anything.

Did you replace his tea?

It's not the tea.

It's the honey.

It was just supposed to be a joke.

You didn't include
the Austrian Biedermeier.

I assumed you wouldn't be interested,

since the mahogany inlay
is a restoration.

Hmm.

A rather vulgar one at that.

Hmm.

Why don't we...

and by "we" I mean "you"...

tackle the dining room next?

Okay, I have been at this
interview all day,

and you are still asking me
to do more to prove myself?

I don't think so.

This isn't an interview.

This is your first day.

I have the job?

Unpaid internship.

And given the masochistic streak
you've revealed today,

toiling so hard to prove yourself,

I see no need to fire you.

Yet.

You will not be disappointed.

I am a very hard worker,

and masochism has nothing to do with it.

Potato, pot-ah-to, my dear.

But since I'm your boss
and not your therapist,

I see no need to quibble.

The rhododendron honey
you ordered online

is also known as "mad honey."

Yeah, it says here people take it

to become aroused and hypersexual.

Yes, but he overdosed.
The more tea he drank,

the more toxic honey he consumed,

the more his symptoms escalated.

You gave him grayanotoxin poisoning.

It... it was just supposed
to loosen you up,

make you a little crazy.

Luckily, now that G has
stopped ingesting the poison,

the effects will wear off.
He will need a cardiac work-up,

but he should recover.

Oh, G, I am so, so...

So gonna owe me for this one.

Abso-freakin'-lutely.

Krishna, Shiva, Vishnu.

That's not bad, we could
call it "Vish" for short.

"It"?

Have you noticed that
the mother-to-be isn't sparking

to naming her baby after a Hindu god?

Hey, sorry I'm late.

- Hi!
- I brought champagne.

And cider.

- Congratulations.
- Mm.

- Congratulations!
- Congratulations, Paige!

Thank you, guys.

All right.

- The champagne.
- Thank you, brother.

- Cider.
- Thank you.

- Evan.
- Thanks.

Okay, we need a toast.

Excuse me.

To Divya.

I think I can add to that.

Uh, that was beautiful, Jeremiah.

When I first met Divya...
her in a white pantsuit,

me in my skivvies...

I never would have imagined
the day would come

when we would call you "mom."

"Mama Divs."

"Mamarishi."

- Okay, okay.
- Okay.

I think we got some good options there.

Sorry. I'm done.

Divya... to you.

We all love you,

and we will always care for you.

For both... for both...

- Okay, okay. Yep. Mm-hmm.
- Both of you. Okay.

Yep.

I am going to make this toast.

Since I found out this news,
I've been shocked,

a little worried, elated,

and possibly panicked.

But, watching the two Lawson brothers

adjust to my new circumstances,

I feel better about myself,

because I thought that
I was a basket case.

But now, I have seen
two real basket cases,

and I realize that I have been
bloody grace under fire.

Yes, you have.

I want to thank you, my friends.

Thank you for being yourselves,

and for being properly thrown
by this huge change.

I think with you beside me,
I can really, really do this.

So... to us.

- To us.
- To us.

Hello. Um, all the tests indicate

everything has returned to normal.

You should be released later today.

Oh, my God. Thank you so much

for saving my better half, Dr. Sacani.

We're going back to being ourselves,

and I promise to respect G's boundaries.

Mm-hmm. Good thing, too, since we have

a lot of work ahead of us
before we meet up

with Craig Carton in the city.

What?

He's introducing us to his agent.

So he actually liked the show yesterday?

- Mm-mm.
- No.

But he was impressed enough
with our new demo reel

that he's willing to forget
about that show.

Yeah, he thinks a guy
and a girl being best friends

and dissecting each other's
opposite lives

- makes for good radio.
- Mm.

- I wish I had thought of that.
- Mm.

I... I still don't get them.

Well, you certainly get Divya,
that's for sure.

It seems like you've progressed a lot,

since you had that crush
on her last summer.

I didn't have a crush on Divya.

I was in love with her.

I realize I was evasive
about that before.

While I was away,
I thought it had passed,

but then when I got back, I found that...

I had some difficulty concentrating.

I attempted to maintain
an appropriate distance,

but then in Savannah

I realized Divya needed a friend,

so I decided to be that.

You know, Jeremiah,
she made the right choice,

telling you first.

Oh, I wasn't the first. Paige was.

Okay, okay, okay.

It's okay, Hank.
Don't help me or anything.

Yeah, no, it looks like
you've got it under control.

Seriously, could you take a few?

Oh, that was my cue.

Sorry, I'm trying to be
a better listener.

- Yeah.
- Come here, boy.

- Come here.
- Here they are.

Oh, my God. Oh, come here, Hunter.

Looks like your vision is improving.

The lab confirmed cat scratch fever,

but you're gonna be fine and back at

the Pampered Pooch in no time.

Oh, I really appreciate you
bringing these guys to see me.

Well, we know how much comfort
they bring you.

Oh!

Those are certified service
dogs, right, Dr. Lawson?

Yes, they are, Dr. Shackleford.

We do everything at Hankmed by the book.

My hospitality only extends
so far, Hank.

Well, your hospitality has been

nothing short of impressive.

Well, I meant it when I said
patients come first at Symphony.

And I believe you.

Look, I know you're talking

- to Dr. Van d*ke...
- Mm-hmm.

But does that mean you're done
talking to Hankmed?

Well, it depends on what
Hankmed is saying.

So now it's a "yes"?

It's still a "maybe,"
but an interested "maybe."

- Mm-hmm.
- We'd like to get to know you.

If you're open to it,
we'd like to rent some space

at Hamptons Heritage, primarily
for your equipment and labs.

Deal. But no rent.

A free trial offer, for a limited time.

All this talking is gonna have
to lead to a decision, soon.

I understand.

Just out of curiosity,

why are you so open to change
all of a sudden?

Change is unavoidable.

Sometimes you need to embrace it
rather than fight it.

Hmm.

So, I guess I'll see you tomorrow.

- Don't forget the donuts.
- Raised and glazed.

Yep.